Heart Of Courage

A commotion at the unit’s door had Sophie whipping around to see what was going on. The room spun. Grabbing at the nearby table, she held on until her head returned to normal.

‘Sophie? Captain Ingram?’ Cooper was before her, reaching for her arms.

She stepped back on shaky legs. ‘I’m fine, Captain.’ There was no air in the room. Her feet were leaden. ‘I’m fine,’ she repeated more forcefully.

‘I’ll see what the racket is about.’ His lips were tight and his eyes were shooting daggers in her direction.

Just then an MP and a soldier pushed inside, the sergeant she’d released held between them, his head lolling forward.

‘Put him on the bed,’ she ordered as she focused on work and not the pounding behind her eyes. ‘What happened?’

Someone told her, ‘He was halfway back to his quarters when he dropped. Out cold, he is.’

Cooper lifted the man’s legs and helped manoeuvre him onto the bed. ‘This the guy who hit his head on the kerb?’ he asked her.

Nodding, she picked up the sergeant’s arm to check his pulse. ‘Concussion for sure. He was denying any symptoms, and I couldn’t nail any, apart from his obvious headache. I want him sent into the city hospital for a scan. Simone?’

‘Onto it,’ was the reply.

Silly man. Why did he let pride get in the way of receiving the correct treatment? Even if she hadn’t foreseen him losing consciousness she’d have been better prepared to treat his symptoms.

Cooper nudged her shoulder lightly with his. ‘You did your best.’

‘Pulse is low.’ She raised the eyelid on the man’s good eye. No one home.

‘Respiration rate is low,’ Cooper commented.

It felt good having him working beside her. ‘He’s coming round. Sergeant, can you hear me?’

The sergeant’s eyes opened briefly.

Thank goodness. It was a start in the right direction. ‘You blacked out. We’re going to send you for a scan.’ She spoke slowly and clearly.

He opened his eyes for a little longer.

‘That knock on your head is more serious than I first thought.’ Not that she’d had much to go on. ‘Has your headache got worse?’

He nodded once, then put his hand up to his mouth.

‘Bucket,’ Cooper called loudly.

Simone returned to say the ambulance was backing up to the door.

Since Cooper was dealing with her patient Sophie filled out a form for the hospital ED. ‘Simone, I want you accompanying him after we’ve finished checking him over.’

‘No problem.’

Fifteen minutes later the unit was quiet, empty of everyone except Sophie and Cooper, who was putting the kettle on to boil.

‘Want a cup of tea? Or hot milk?’ he asked.

Sinking onto a stool, she felt shattered. So not up to speed. The heat and her pregnancy were taking their toll. ‘I made a mistake not insisting he tell me his symptoms.’

‘I heard some of your conversation. He was never going to admit things in front of his men.’ Cooper dropped teabags into two mugs. ‘Tea it is.’

‘I should’ve known to take him into another room.’

‘He should’ve known to talk to you. Are you on parade at zero seven hundred?’

The thought made her feel even more tired. ‘Yes.’ Four more days to go. ‘Never thought I’d say this but I’m looking forward to stopping work, and I haven’t even been busy in here.’ She glanced at the stack of notes from their earlier patients. ‘Most of the time, at any rate.’

‘You could ask to be stood down.’

She raised one eye brow at him in reply.

‘I figured,’ was Cooper’s only comment.

While she drank her tea she cruised the internet for places to rent in Auckland.

‘Can’t that wait?’ Cooper asked with his usual bluntness.

‘The sooner I set up appointments the sooner I’ll find somewhere and can get my mess sorted.’

‘There is an alternative, Sophie. You can bunk down at my place for a few days if you’re still determined to find your own place.’ He was frustrated with her. It showed in his tone and the tightness of the hand holding his mug.

It was more than she needed right now. Shutting down the laptop, she took her tea and headed for the door. ‘See you after parade.’

* * *

‘Attention,’ shouted the sergeant leading the parade.

Boots slapped the tarmac as rows of soldiers stood straighter than straight.

Cooper was to the side of the ground, standing at attention but not part of any unit. Sophie was at the front of the medical corps, eyes to the front. She hadn’t said a word to him over a hurried breakfast in the canteen. Exhaustion had rippled off her like heat waves in the desert. Her fatigues needed straightening and her hair could do with being tied tighter but far be it for him to point that out. Someone on the parade ground would do it and cop her wrath for their effort.

List stood at the front, ready to talk to the troops. He glanced Cooper’s way, and then at Sophie. A frown appeared on his brow, and he dipped his head at Sophie.

What? Cooper’s gaze returned to her. She seemed to be struggling to stay upright, swaying on her feet. Her chin was pushed forward as though she was willing herself to stand erect. As he made to step out and head to her she slumped in a heap.

Cooper ran. ‘Sophie.’ Instantly dropping to his knees, he reached for her, felt for a pulse. It was slow but at least it was there.

Simone had been standing two away and was as quick to reach her as he’d been. ‘Sophie, what’s happening? Did you faint?’

‘Let’s get you inside out of this heat. I need to check your BP.’ Low blood pressure would explain what had happened. Might explain a few incidents where she’d appeared to lose focus briefly. Like when she’d lost her balance outside Harry’s on the day he’d arrived. It made Cooper think he was on the right track.

Sophie flopped against him, blinking and trying to rub her head. ‘What happened?’

Cooper held her gently and looked up to growl at the man next in line. ‘Get a stretcher. Now.’

‘Yes, sir.’

‘Sophie, can you hear me?’

‘Yes. I’m fine.’

‘You’re not fine. When did you last have your BP checked?’

Simone answered for her. ‘I did it two weeks ago. It was normal.’

‘Two weeks and you haven’t had a reading since?’ No wonder he needed to keep an eye on her. She wasn’t doing a good job of looking after herself. ‘What about blood sugar?’

‘Shouldn’t we talk about this inside?’ Simone glared at him before tilting her head towards nearby troops. ‘Sir.’

List appeared, saving him having to answer. Simone was right. ‘Captain Ingram? Are you all right?’

She nodded. ‘I’m fine. Please continue with the parade. With your permission, Sir, I’ll go to the medical unit.’

‘Permission granted,’ List snapped. Then he leaned down and said quietly, ‘Take the morning off, Sophie. You’ve got to look after yourself.’

Whatever she’d been about to say was forgotten, instead her eyes widening as the soldier arrived with a stretcher. ‘That had better not be for me. I’ll walk, thank you very much.’ Instantly she struggled to stand up.

Cooper put a restraining hand on her arm. ‘No, you don’t. You’ve just taken a tumble, and before you say a word, think about the baby.’

The look she sent him should’ve frozen him to the spot for eternity. At least she sank back down to the ground and muttered, ‘All right.’

Cooper sighed. She had landed on her knees and tipped forward but had gone sideways just before her baby tummy could hit the ground. Still, he wanted to check her over, make sure Sophie and the baby were fine. And find the cause of these light-headed incidents she was having. This definitely wasn’t the first, and he doubted it’d be the last until they knew more.

Above them List pressed his lips together, no doubt smothering a smile at Sophie’s reluctant concession to Cooper’s order. ‘Right, soldiers.’ He nodded to Simone and the soldier who’d brought the stretcher. ‘Take Captain Ingram inside.’

Cooper felt for the two as they reached down to lift the stretcher once Sophie had slid across onto it. She had plenty more of those icy glares and wasn’t worried about sharing them around.

List leaned close to murmur, ‘Go with her. Make sure she’s all right.’ Then he marched back to the front of the parade.

Cooper muttered, ‘Try and stop me, mate,’ and strode after the stretcher bearers. Now the fun would really start.

Except Sophie surprised him. ‘I’m feeling stupid. There’ve been a few times when I’ve experienced light-headedness but I put it down to the heat and lack of sleep. What sort of doctor does that make me? It’s not a good start to motherhood, is it?’ Her eyes lifted to him, imploring him to go easy on her.

She didn’t have to ask. He wasn’t about to rip into her, only wanted to make sure she and baby were safe. The sadness and worry blinking out of those green eyes hit him hard. She wasn’t as confident as she made out. Yet she insisted on going it alone. Not on his watch she wasn’t. Not now, not ever. They were in this together. Even if not living under the same roof, he’d make absolutely certain he was always there for her. ‘I heard doctors usually made the worst mothers, always thinking of all the horrific things that can go wrong. It’s cool that you’re not like that.’

Suspicion clouded her eyes. ‘You don’t think I’m too casual?’

‘No, Sophie, I don’t. You look fit and healthy. I haven’t seen you do anything you shouldn’t, like go jogging in the heat or drink alcohol. Our baby is in perfect hands.’

She gasped.

So did Simone.

Cooper slapped a hand on his forehead. ‘Sorry.’ He’d forgotten they weren’t alone. ‘I shouldn’t have said that.’

Simone was smiling as she looked at Sophie. ‘Don’t worry. I know nothing.’ Then she leaned over to give Sophie a hug. ‘Knew you were more than friends.’

Sophie looked surprised. ‘Actually, we’re not. Not really.’

Time he was out of there. Partaking in a discussion with the hard-nosed sergeant about their relationship was not happening. ‘I’ll get the sphygmomanometer and phlebotomy kit.’ And some air that wasn’t laced with Sophie scent and filled with words he wanted to refute. They weren’t friends, not in the true sense of the word, yet he wanted to be. More than anything. He wanted to be able to spend time with Sophie and say anything he liked, help her without wondering how she’d interpret his actions. At the moment they were leery of each other, and he was past putting up with that.

Neither woman tried to stop him going, but when he returned with the equipment needed to take a BP reading and some bloods to send to the lab Sophie was on her own, looking glum.

‘Hey, you’re doing fine.’ Cooper ran a hand over her shoulder.

Tears glittered out of the eyes she raised to him. ‘You think? I’m feeling so hopeless.’

Pressure built in his chest, and the need to be there for her expanded further. This wasn’t just about his responsibility towards her and the baby. This was about that friendship they didn’t have yet. ‘There’s not a hopeless bone in your body.’

‘I’d say thanks but, really, you don’t know me at all.’

‘I know you’re stubborn, kind, fun, sexy...’ Now, why had he added that? Friends and sex were a mismatch. Except sex had led to them being tied together with a child. Now the friendship had to start. Which meant sex was off the list. ‘Did I mention annoying and adorable?’

Now she looked disappointed. ‘It’s been said before: you’re a charmer.’

He’d meant every word and hadn’t been trying to get his own way about anything. He’d been wanting to make her relax and stop fretting about how she was coping. That wasn’t good for her or the infant. ‘Let’s find out what’s going on.’ He held up the BP cuff.

Holding out her arm, she told him, ‘You can’t do a glucose test. I ate breakfast.’

‘We’ll start with a non-fasting and if that’s even slightly raised we’ll follow up with a fasting blood tomorrow.’ No more stalling.

Sophie sagged, her chin hitting her sternum. ‘Get on with it.’ There was no strength in her words, just defeat.

That unsettled him further. He preferred the fighting, stubborn Sophie to this one. Watching the monitor until it beeped, he felt out of his depth. Sure, reading BPs and taking bloods was basic medicine, but cheering up his patient when he was so involved was more complicated than he’d expected. And he was about to add to her gloom. ‘BP’s too low.’

‘I figured.’ She shook her head. ‘Gestational diabetes is looking more likely by the minute.’

‘They don’t necessarily go hand in hand,’ he argued.

‘I know.’ She held her arm out again and watched quietly while he drew some blood.

* * *

Three hours later Cooper found Sophie munching on a healthy salad and reading files in her office. ‘Your glucose is a little too high.’

‘So tomorrow I’d do a glucose tolerance test. Can we start early? I get hungry all the time.’

‘I’ll take the fasting sample twelve hours after your dinner tonight.’ And fingers crossed the final results would be normal.

They weren’t. ‘I’ve got gestational diabetes.’ Sophie put the phone down the following afternoon and stared at Cooper.

‘I was hoping otherwise.’ But he wasn’t surprised at the result.

‘You and me both. Guess I’m off the ice cream.’

‘They can relax in the canteen. There’ll be enough left to go round everyone from now on.’

Her smile was tired. ‘Home is looking better and better all the time.’

Home meant a lot to do, if what he’d gleaned from their conversations was true. ‘You made those appointments for viewing properties yet?’

‘I’ve got four lined up the day after we touch down.’

Of course she had. Tired she may be, inefficient she wasn’t. ‘Anything that really excites you?’ Would it be wrong to hope not? He might’ve got off the hook when she’d turned down his offer to live with him for a while, but more and more the need to be there with her for these weeks leading up to the birth was dominating his thoughts. She needed pampering. He was going to pamper Sophie? Yep, and why not?

‘Yes, all of them,’ she replied in the flattest voice he’d heard in a long time.

‘Better than nothing you like.’

She didn’t answer.

CHAPTER SIX

THE TEMPERATURES FINALLY EASED, for which Sophie was grateful. The heat had been all-consuming. By the time she boarded the air force plane bound for home she was almost sorry to be leaving.

‘Thanks for everything you’ve done for me,’ she told Alistair as she stepped up to kiss his cheek. ‘You’ve been a pal.’

He wrapped her in a bear hug. ‘Keep me posted on junior, and take care of yourself. I want a photo as soon as she arrives.’

‘You’ll get one.’

She was surprised to see his eyes glistening before he turned away to Cooper and said, ‘Hey, man.’

Sophie watched them do the man hug and thump on the back thing, and almost laughed out loud. Guys. These two were close. She’d been a part of their camaraderie over the past few days, going with them to the pub for dinner twice. Theirs was an easy friendship grown out of hard times during active duty. She’d have liked that with someone. The closest friend she’d made in the army was Kelly, and she’d missed her every day since she’d been evacuated from Bamiyan.

‘Come on, let’s get on board the tin can.’ Cooper took her elbow.

Sophie promptly pulled free. ‘I’m not an invalid,’ she said, but there was no annoyance in her words. She seemed to have run out of steam since her collapse on parade. Learning about the diabetes had knocked her sideways too, and made her ultra-careful about everything she ate.

‘But you are proud.’ Cooper grinned. ‘Don’t want anyone to see you being helped up that ramp, do you?’

She glanced across the shimmering tarmac to the plane. ‘It’s not Everest.’ Not quite. When she got home she was not going to go for power walks ever again. Neither would she do press-ups or sit-ups or take up running once her baby was born. She was so over exercise. Though she did quite like her sculpted figure—if it was still there.

The aircraft interior was stifling. Sweat prickled her back instantly. ‘Can you leave the ramp open on the flight?’ she asked the young girl overseeing the last crates being loaded.

‘No, Captain. That would be dangerous.’

‘Fair enough.’ She laughed and turned away from the serious face staring at her as though she was crazy.

Cooper led the way to two empty bucket seats. ‘These’ll do. I’ll stow our rucksacks.’

Kick. Laying her hand on the spot, she rubbed. Kick.

We’re going home, sweetheart.

Home. A foreign word in her vocabulary. Home was apparently where the heart was. So whatever flat or apartment she rented, her heart would be there for her baby. She hadn’t experienced making a home for herself, had usually rented a room in a house filled with colleagues and got on with working until the next trip. As for furniture and kitchen utensils, there was a lot of shopping coming up.

It wasn’t easy lowering her butt all the way down to the seat almost on the floor.

‘Hey.’ Cooper was there, holding her elbow to prevent her from sprawling on her face.

‘Thanks.’ Kick, kick. ‘I think little miss is aware we’re off on an adventure. She’s not letting me forget her.’ As long as she didn’t decide to make her grand entrance in mid-air. Shoving aside that fear, she asked herself if that would make her daughter an Australian or a Kiwi.

‘What’s causing that confused look on your face?’ Cooper asked.

‘When did you last deliver a baby?’ Why had she asked? It wasn’t what she’d been thinking at all, and she didn’t really want to know the answer if Cooper hadn’t delivered for a long time.

‘A while ago.’ He still sounded confident, but he’d been a surgeon for four years and surgeons always sounded confident.

‘Define a while.’

‘Sophie, are you having pains? We can get off now, but you’ll have to be quick. We’re due to take off in five.’ He started to get out of his seat.

‘Easy,’ she gave back to him. ‘Just passing the time with inane conversation.’ But all her fingers were crossed. Having a baby on the plane, surrounded with air force personnel, was not her idea of fun. Probably wasn’t Cooper’s either, she realised as she shifted her butt to get comfortable.

Behave, little one.

* * *

Cooper held his breath all the way across Australia and the Tasman Sea, not letting it out until the west coast of New Zealand came into sight. Even if the ridiculous happened and Sophie started labour now they’d be on the ground within a very short time and there’d an ambulance and midwives and a hospital in case their baby needed special attention.

But even as those thoughts zipped through his head he couldn’t help wondering what it would be like to be there when his daughter was delivered. He crossed his fingers he wasn’t tempting fate. Sophie would hate to have her baby thirty thousand feet up in the air surrounded with people she’d never met before. She’d also intimated she wasn’t having him anywhere close during the birth. Somehow he had to persuade her to change her mind.

Shock jerked him. Being at the birth would be very intimate. She’d told him a friend was planning on being there for her. That irked. He should be there. He’d got her pregnant, hadn’t denied his role, so surely he could see it through to the end? The more Cooper thought about it the more he knew he had to be at the birth. Would it make her more comfortable with his presence if he promised to stay at the top end of the bed? He’d hold her hands and give her water, wipe her brow. Yeah, right. He’d never make a good nurse. But this was Sophie. A woman he was beginning to treasure: to care for as a special friend.

Friends didn’t have the kind of hot sex he’d been imagining with Sophie every night in his room at Darwin.

‘You’d finally relaxed, and now you’re all tense again. What’s up? Are we nearly home?’ Sophie mumbled against his chest, where she’d been sleeping for the last couple of hours.

‘There’s land beneath us.’ His arm had gone numb ages ago, but he hadn’t moved in case he woke her. Those grey smudges under her eyes had been a dead giveaway. She was exhausted. Which meant she was in no shape to take a taxi home to her parents’ and deal with explaining her situation. As far as he knew, they weren’t expecting her, which could add to her problems, given there wasn’t a strong bond between them all. Neither did they know they were about to become grandparents.

Nor did his father. Cooper was saving that for when they got together over a beer and played catch up. The old man would be okay with it. Might even be ecstatic. Then again he might roar with laughter and ask what Cooper had been thinking to get a woman pregnant. The straight answer was there hadn’t been any thinking going on at the time.

Sophie sat up and stretched her legs in front of her. ‘You heading for your house as soon as you’re through quarantine?’

‘That’s the plan. What about you?’

‘I’m staying on the base for the night.’

No way. What if she went into labour? She’d be alone, no friends, no midwife that she’d got to know. ‘Why?’

‘Easier. I’ll head into the city for those appointments tomorrow and decide what I’m doing after that. Probably visit Mum and Dad, suss out their reaction.’

Cooper was shaking his head at her. ‘You’re coming home with me.’

‘No, I’m not.’ But there was no substance to her words, and hope had briefly flicked through her eyes.

‘No argument. It’s a done deal. One night, if that’s all you want. Then you can sort things out and decide what you’re doing. But today, after this long, uncomfortable flight, you need a hot shower and a decent meal and then a good night’s uninterrupted sleep. Something that’s not guaranteed on base.’ Now he was sounding condescending. But he cared, all right? Someone needed to be looking out for Sophie, and at the moment he was the only person on hand.

‘Put it like that and I’m finding it hard to turn you down. One night only, right? That’s the deal. I’ll be out of your hair tomorrow.’

‘If that’s what you want.’ It was for the best. They couldn’t live under the same roof permanently. How could he bring a woman home knowing Sophie slept down the hall? If he wanted to, that was. Huh? Since when didn’t he bring females home?

You haven’t even looked at another woman since landing in Darwin and seeking out Sophie.

Get real. Sex had been non-existent since Sophie. Not even a casual hook-up. Opportunities had been endless. It had been his own interest that had been lacking. Captain Ingram had spoiled him for other women.

But that didn’t mean he was making Sophie the centre of his attention. She might be gorgeous and fun, and pregnant with his child, but she wasn’t the love of his life. Would never be. No one would. He enjoyed, preferred, being single and he wasn’t prepared to give that up. Not even for Sophie and his child? Especially for them. They had the power to hold him down. Every decision he made would be tempered with what was best for them. While that wasn’t so bad, his unreliability as a father and partner was.

He had a lot to be grateful to Sophie for. Turning him down had shocked him but she was right. They wouldn’t be able to sustain an enjoyable relationship, platonic or otherwise, under the same roof for ever. It would certainly be unfair on their daughter.

His mother had opted to desert him by taking her own life, and while that was different it had set him to becoming independent, and he’d started closing his heart to loving with abandon. He and Dad had been lost without his mother, and he wasn’t prepared to go through that again with anyone else, or inflict a similar loss on someone.

So thank you, Sophie, for being strong and turning me down.

The woman putting him through the wringer these days flicked him a tired smile. ‘You sure there’ll be hot water? Your dad won’t have forgotten to leave it on?’

‘If he has we’ll pay him a visit.’ Cooper dropped an arm over her shoulders and tucked her close. ‘Everything will be just fine. You’ll see.’