The Secret Child

She took a deep breath as if to calm herself. “Oh. I read about the lawsuit. You‘re being sued for copyright infringement, aren‘t you?”

Cole nodded, disappointed she preferred to keep their conversation on an impersonal level. “An overzealous employee duplicated a program and sold it as ours.”

Marni‘s brow creased. “Why don‘t you just settle?”

Cole lifted the beer bottle in his hand and took a quick drink before answering. “We‘ve tried, but the guy who developed the program wants blood.”

A hint of a smile touched her lips. “You‘re fighting a losing battle, Cole. Juries don‘t take too kindly to the big guys stealing from the little guys.”

“We haven‘t gone to trial. We only arbitrated today,” he told her. “I didn‘t ask you here to talk law, Marni. How have you been?”

The smile disappeared, and Cole could almost see the protective barrier she drew around herself again. “Fine. I‘ve got a good job, a nice little house by the beach. I couldn‘t be happier.”

That wasn‘t what he wanted to know. “Married?”

“No.” She answered too quickly, as if the subject was off limits. Cole let it drop, for the time being.

He brought the conversation back to business. When she talked about her work, she didn‘t seem so damned nervous. “You been with the D.A.‘s office long?”

“Six years.” She lifted the glass of beer to her mouth.

Cole watched with interest as her lips settled on the rim. The first stirring of desire pulsed through him, settling in his belly. He attempted to douse the provocative thoughts with another shot of beer and failed.

Marni regarded Cole carefully. He‘d acquired a polished veneer over the years. Even from across the table he looked powerful. And the man had a definite monopoly on virility, whether he realized it or not. Cole was pure male, and he affected her more than she cared to admit.

An uncomfortable silence stretched between them, and Marni didn‘t know how to break it. She was a successful lawyer, fast on her feet and able to shift tactics without missing a beat. Speaking to juries and judges nearly every day, she‘d rarely been at a loss for words, but she stared mutely as Cole lifted his beer bottle to his lips. She averted her eyes and concentrated on the beer label, willing the memories of Cole to go away. Absently she fingered the label and began to peel it off the amber bottle.

“How‘s your mother?” he asked her.

She sighed. “We–I lost my mother a few years ago.”

Cole caught her slip and could only wonder about it. Who was us? She‘d said she wasn‘t married. Could it be an ex-husband?

“What about your family?” she returned politely.

Cole shrugged. “My sister married Don Turner and claims to be miserable because he works all the time. Daily shopping consoles her. She has two great kids, though.”

A small smile touched her lips. “Janelle has kids?”

“I know. Janelle hated kids until she had her own. Two adorable little girls.”

“And your parents?”

Cole noticed the barely laced sarcasm in her voice. “Mom and Dad will never change. Dad‘s talking about retirement now, and Mom complains about the lack of male grandchildren to carry on the Ballinger name.” He saw an odd light flicker briefly in Marni‘s eyes before she glanced at her watch, and he wondered if she had a date. A surge of jealousy he didn‘t understand vibrated through him. He spoke without thinking. “I‘ve missed you, Marni.”

“How‘s your wife, Cole?” Her voice was hard, cold.

He creased his brow in surprise. “How did you know about Elizabeth?”

The hardness in her voice was reflected in her eyes. “Your father told me. I wasn‘t gone more than two months before you were on your honeymoon.”

His irritation returned at her accusatory tone. “Hey, you dumped me, remember? Besides, Elizabeth was a mistake.”

Her short bark of laughter held no humor. “Was it?”

“Marni, it‘s a long story–”

“And I‘m sorry, but I don‘t have time to listen to it now. I have to be somewhere.” The coldness of her voice clawed at his heart with icy fingers.

Marni attempted to slide from the booth, but Cole reached out to stop her. His hand settled over hers. Her soft, smooth skin evoked memories of the night they‘d made love by the lake. Candlelight from the glass globe on the table flickered, and for a moment Cole thought of Marni‘s skin shimmering in the moonlit night. His eyes held hers. “Don‘t go, Marni.”

“I have to.” She spoke calmly, without emotion, but the heat burning in her eyes told him she was just as affected as he was by the simple touch.

“Elizabeth tricked me into marriage,” he said, unsure why he felt compelled to explain. He owed her nothing. “She said she was pregnant and then conveniently ‘lost’ the baby a few weeks after the wedding.”

“Elizabeth was pregnant?” Her voice was a choked whisper. “You slept with her while we were together?”

Cole watched as the blood drained from her face. Pain, fierce and tangible, flared in her gaze. A heaviness settled in his chest when she looked away.

“No,” he said. “Not then.” Guilt he didn‘t understand washed over him. He‘d gotten drunk in an attempt to drown his anger when Marni had broken up with him with no explanation. “Why did you give me the brush-off?” he asked, turning the tables.

“How is Elizabeth?” she countered.

Cole didn‘t miss the censure in her voice, or the fact that once again she‘d evaded his question. “Elizabeth and I divorced more than ten years ago. Last I heard, she was living in Europe.”

She lifted her gaze to his, anguish evident in her deep brown eyes. He wished he was privy to her thoughts. God only knew what went on in Marni Rodgers‘s mind.

“I have to go,” she said hastily. “I have an early day in court tomorrow.”

“How about dinner? You need to eat.” Cole was reluctant to let her get away from him. He told himself it was because he wanted the past resolved, not because he wanted to delay her departure.

“I‘m not hungry,” she said. She truly doubted she‘d be able to eat a thing after the blow Cole had just dealt her. He‘d married Elizabeth because she said she was pregnant. Marni ached with the same inner pain she‘d experienced when she‘d first learned he‘d married Elizabeth. When had Cole made love to Elizabeth? How long had she been in California before he turned to someone else? A week? Ten days? Not much longer if he‘d married Elizabeth within two months of her departure from Kansas.

“Come on, Marni. I haven‘t seen you in nearly thirteen years and you can‘t even spare a few hours to have dinner with me?” His voice was soft and coaxing. Reaching across the table, he covered her small hand with his large one.

Marni pulled her hand free. “It won‘t work, Cole.”

“I‘m not asking you for a lifetime, Marni. Only dinner.”

“I can‘t,” she said firmly. Why couldn‘t he just leave her alone?

He threw up his hands. “Okay, okay, don‘t get upset.”

Marni‘s sigh of relief was short-lived.

“I‘d like to see you again.” He spoke with a huskiness that unnerved her.

“Dammit, Cole,” she snapped in irritation. “I can‘t see you. It‘s out of the question.”

“Why?”

Marni looked at his face. His gentle eyes belied the demand of his tone. “Can‘t you just accept it? I don‘t want to see you.” Her voice shook with emotion. “I thought we had this conversation thirteen years ago.”

“We did, but you‘re still lying,” he stated matter-of-factly.

With a confidence she didn‘t feel, she rejected his words as nonsense. She was over Cole. He meant nothing to her any longer.

Liar! her inner voice shouted.

“I have to go,” she said again, scooting out from behind the table.

Cole frowned at her and slid out of his seat. “I‘ll walk you to your car,” he said, dropping a couple of bills on the table. When they reached the entrance of the restaurant, he moved in front of her and held the door. She cast a quick glance at him, but his face was somber and she couldn‘t tell what he was thinking.

“Where are you parked?”

“In the back. The white Prelude.” They walked together in silence in the crisp evening air.

“There.” She pointed when the sleek car came into view.

Marni retrieved her keys from her purse and disengaged the car alarm. A high-toned bleep pierced the silence between them.

“How about dinner tomorrow?” he asked.

Marni sighed heavily. “No.” She could just see Cole pulling up in front of her beach house and Jenna bounding down the steps to greet him. Pain twisted Marni‘s heart as she fantasized about father and daughter together as they should have been. Images of Jenna in a high chair at eighteen months, her green eyes and sable hair so like Cole‘s, while a battle of wills ensued over a jar of strained carrots. Cole teaching Jenna how to ride a bicycle or helping Jenna understand the theory behind multiplication tables. Dreams, only dreams, of a life not meant to be. Memories Marni and Jenna had been cheated of because of her self-doubt and her concern about her mother‘s failing health. Carson Ballinger had played on her insecurities and financial problems expertly, finally convincing Marni he was right. She wasn‘t good enough for Cole.

“You‘re not married, right?” Cole asked her again, his voice pulling her back to the present. Back to the harsh reality of the truth.

“No, Cole. I‘m not married.”

“Involved with someone?”

For an instant, Marni thought about lying to him. “No.”

“Then have dinner with me.” The look he gave her told her he wasn‘t going to give up until he got his way.

“I can‘t,” she repeated emphatically.

He opened the car door for her. “I‘ll pick you up at your office at five tomorrow.”

“Please don‘t do this to me, Cole,” Marni whispered.

“Not unless you give me a good reason why not.”

Marni could give him not one, but two, great reasons–his father and Jenna–she thought bitterly.

“I‘m waiting.” Cole‘s voice was husky, the expression in his eyes unreadable.

He radiated a vitality that still drew her, and if she wasn‘t careful, she could easily get caught up in his potent sexual magnetism again. She was already fighting the tingling in the pit of her stomach. “Then you‘ll have a long wait,” she said, determined not to give in to her physical reaction to Cole. She looked at him then, wishing she could call the words back. Faint lines of pain were etched around his eyes. She recalled that look from the balmy summer night when she‘d ended their relationship.

Tell me why, Marni. You aren‘t making any sense. I‘m waiting.

Then you‘ll have a long wait.

“I have to go,” she said, choked with emotion. She slipped behind the wheel before she made a complete fool of herself. Cole‘s hand on the car door prevented her from closing it.

“I‘ll call you tomorrow,” he said, a hard glint of determination in his eyes.

Marni shook her head in exasperation. “Why, Cole? Why is this so damned important to you? I wasn‘t so important thirteen years ago when you married Elizabeth Wakefield, was I?” She didn‘t care if she sounded jealous, or even that she had no right to be angry with him.

“You were the one who walked out, remember?” The harsh tone of his voice made her wince all the same.

Marni yanked the door out of his grasp and slammed it shut. Slipping the key into the ignition, she gunned the car to life. She promptly found Reverse and pulled out of the parking slot.

The car easily slipped into first gear, and Marni stepped on the gas. When she reached the driveway, she glanced in the rearview mirror and searched for Cole. The darkness prevented her from seeing his expression, but she had a pretty good idea he wasn‘t too happy at the moment. The Cole Ballinger she knew wasn‘t accustomed to being turned down and she seriously doubted he‘d changed over the years.

CHAPTER TWO

“J ENNA!” MARNI CALLED from the kitchen. “We‘re going to be late.”

After rinsing her coffee cup, she pulled back the white lace curtains over the sink. She cracked open the window, allowing the early morning sea breeze to waft into the cozy blue-and-white kitchen, and thought about Cole.

The shock of seeing him, talking to him, touching him, brought back every precious memory she‘d kept close to her heart over the years. Unfortunately, pain followed close behind. Marni wondered if Cole had really loved her as he‘d claimed. How could he have when he turned to Elizabeth so quickly? Carson predicted Cole would tire of her sooner or later. Seemed that Carson had been right.

A part of her, a very selfish part, wanted to see Cole again. Regardless of how foolish the idea, she knew to allow him into her life again would only be a mistake. A disastrous one. How long would it be before he learned the truth?

“Mom!”

Marni turned to see Jenna standing in the doorway, her arms crossed over her chest, impatience evident in her sea green eyes. “What were you thinking about?”

Marni mentally shook herself. “Nothing in particular.”

“I called you a dozen times and you just kept staring out the window.”

Marni gave a nervous laugh. “A dozen, indeed. Are you ready?”

“I have to get my books.” Jenna turned to leave, then stopped. “Oh. You left these in the dining room.” She held the message slips Marni had stuffed into her pocket on her way out of the office last night, and laid them on the white tiled countertop before scampering off.

Marni read the messages. One was from the public defender on the Kendell case, two others were from defense attorneys on minor offenses she was handling, and there was one from Cole. Her hand shook. The message was only a reminder to meet him at Muldoon‘s. He must have called her office right after they ran into each other on the courthouse steps. Marni crumpled the pink slip and tossed it into the trash bin under the sink. What if Jenna had seen the message? She was not a dull-witted child; she knew her father‘s name. What were the chances of another Cole Ballinger calling? She resolved to be more attentive in the future.

After dropping Jenna off at the junior high school, Marni drove straight to the courthouse. Fridays were devoted to felony arraignments. When she entered the courtroom, the prisoners had already been led into the jury box. Marni perused the prisoners as she took her seat at the prosecutor‘s table. Three men and one woman in chains. The remainder were more than likely arrested on drug offenses.

Marni glanced at the defense table to see who she‘d be opposing. She saw a couple of young public defenders and sized them up quickly. They‘d provide no problem. She recognized a few criminal attorneys and her friend and former classmate, Rebecca Parks, a family law attorney. Probably representing a deadbeat dad, she surmised.

The bailiff directed the court to order. After the judge was seated, he called the first case. The chained woman glared hard at Marni and stood.

Marni quickly located and scanned the file. She stood to address Judge Bickerman. “The state requests the defendant be held over for a bail hearing, Your Honor.”

Rebecca stepped forward, her rich, straight black hair pulled away from her face in a tight knot at her nape. Sharp blue eyes assessed Marni, their friendship forgotten for the moment. “The defendant has no record of any prior convictions.”

“None in this state,” Marni said before turning her attention back to the bench. “Your Honor, we‘ve just received word from Tulsa, Oklahoma, of an outstanding bench warrant. The defendant has a history of failing to appear.”

The judge, a hulk of a man with a thick patch of gray hair, shuffled through the paperwork in front of him. “I see no record of this in the court‘s file, Ms. Rodgers.”

Marni held up a piece of paper.

“Hand it to the bailiff,” the judge instructed, an inflection of boredom in his tone.

Rebecca sent Marni a baleful glare. “I request a copy, Your Honor.”

The judge reviewed the arrest warrant, ignoring the request. “A hearing to establish bail will be heard Monday at two o‘clock.” He stared hard at Rebecca. “Do you have any further objections, Ms. Parks?”

Rebecca lowered her eyes. “None, Your Honor.”

Marni cringed inwardly at the judge‘s harsh tone. Poor Rebecca. She didn‘t deserve such treatment, but Judge Bickerman obviously hadn‘t forgotten Rebecca had represented Mrs. Bickerman in their divorce three years ago.

When the last prisoner was led from the courtroom, Marni gathered the armload of files together, then turned toward the low swinging door separating the attorneys from the audience. Rebecca Parks held the door for her.

“I‘ll see you get a copy of the bench warrant.” Marni smiled at her friend. “What are you doing here today?”

“The firm‘s criminal attorney is on vacation.” Rebecca grimaced. “Free for lunch?” Their earlier courtroom demeanor dissolved as they slipped into a familiar and easy friendship.

They walked side by side out of the courtroom. Marni looked up and down the corridor. She half expected to see Cole, but she was relieved to find he wasn‘t there. He continued to occupy her thoughts; she knew he wouldn‘t let up until he got his way. “I‘d love to, but I haven‘t even been to the office yet,” she explained. “How‘s next week?”

Rebecca shifted the bulk of files in her arms and pressed the button for the elevator. “Hectic. I‘m stuck with criminal arraignments on top of my regular caseload. How about dinner next week? You and Jenna can come over and I‘ll cook.”

“Actually, I do need to see you,” she said turning serious.

“Sure. Problem?”

Marni shook her head. “Not yet. I just need some legal advice.” She glanced above at the bank of elevators and watched the flashing lights behind the floor numbers, ignoring Rebecca‘s questioning blue eyes.

A low-toned ping signaled the arrival of the elevator car. The center door slid open and Marni gasped. Cole stepped out dressed in khaki slacks and a navy blazer. The whiteness of his shirt emphasized his golden tan and the color of his eyes. A blue paisley tie completed the picture of a well-dressed man.

Recovering quickly from her shock, she stiffened both her spine and her resolve not to let him into her life again, no matter how much he affected her. “What are you doing here?” she asked. Her tone was harsher than she‘d intended, if the perplexed expression on Rebecca‘s classically beautiful face was any indication.

Cole graced her with one of his disarming smiles, the corners of his eyes crinkling. “I came to take you to lunch.”

Marni sighed. “Cole, I can‘t.”

“Are we going to have that old argument again?” He turned his attention to Rebecca. “She needs to eat, right?”

Rebecca eyed Cole appreciatively. “Absolutely. Now I understand why you turned me down.”

The silky purr of Rebecca‘s voice made Marni bristle. No one could claim her friend wasn‘t a smart woman, but at this moment, she was simply a woman who appreciated a handsome man. And that man was Cole Ballinger.

“I didn‘t know he was–” Marni began as Rebecca stepped through the open doors of the elevator.

“Don‘t worry about it.” Rebecca gave a deep, throaty chuckle. “I‘ll talk to you later,” she called as the door slid closed.

Marni was left alone with Cole.

He reached for the files in her arm. “Can I take those?”

“No.” Marni pushed the button to signal for another car. “I have to get to the office.” She kept her eyes on the lights above the elevators. “I have a busy day.”

The smile on his face disappeared, only to be replaced by a tensing of his jaw. “There are a few questions I want answered.”

Now, what was that supposed to mean? Fear gripped her, but she shook the sensation away. “Cole, please. Leave me alone.” She concentrated on the indicators. Two more floors and she‘d be free of Cole.

“Why?” he demanded.

“I have a lot to do this afternoon.” If I don‘t look at him, he‘ll go away.

“You can‘t be all that busy.”

Marni‘s shoulders sagged. So much for mind over matter. “I am. Now, please, just go away. It‘s been great seeing you, but really, I just don‘t have the time.”

When the elevator finally arrived, Marni stepped inside, trying desperately to ignore him. She punched the button for the garage and prayed the door would close before Cole could step through the portal.

Her guardian angel must have been on a coffee break, because Cole sauntered into the lift and stood close beside her. Her shoulder rested against his upper arm in the crowded car. Marni could feel the muscles bunch beneath the fabric of his blazer. His cologne mingled with his masculine scent, tickling her senses. God, he smelled good. Marni‘s pulse quickened as she cast him a sideways glance. He smiled down at her, but the look in his eyes said something she wasn‘t ready to analyze.

The doors opened on the third floor, and a few people pushed their way forward. Cole rested his hands on her shoulders in a possessive gesture and stepped behind her. His fingers lightly brushed the side of her neck, and Marni closed her eyes against her increased awareness of him.

The doors closed and Cole released her, moving again to her side. She could sense his eyes on her but willed herself not to look in his direction. She had to find a way to escape him. She couldn‘t have Cole following her to her office. She rarely dated, and if Cole came waltzing into the D.A.‘s office, surely people would talk. Lawyers were the worst when it came to gossip. Maybe if she had lunch with him he‘d be satisfied and not bother her again. Besides, he‘d tracked her down to the courthouse, he could just as easily discover where she worked–or lived. Then he‘d be sure to find out about Jenna, and Marni refused to even think about the possible ramifications.

They reached the garage and Marni stepped out of the elevator, Cole on her heels. “All right. I‘ll have lunch with you, but I have to be back in the office this afternoon.”

Cole said nothing but followed her to her car. She opened the trunk to place the files and briefcase inside. Alarm sparked through her. A box full of clothes Jenna had outgrown sat in the center of the trunk. Marni had planned to drop them off at the Salvation Army but hadn‘t gotten around to it. She struggled to fight back rising hysteria. Practically throwing the files in the trunk, she bent to pick up the briefcase, but Cole held it in his hands. Before she could stop him, he set the case in the trunk. He‘d barely moved out of harm‘s way when she slammed the lid closed, praying he hadn‘t seen the contents of the open box.

“Where do you want to eat?” She spoke quickly, hoping Cole wouldn‘t detect her nervousness.

“I‘ll drive,” he told her. He placed his hand on the small of her back and steered her away from her car before she could argue.

Seated within the confines of Cole‘s sleek black Jaguar, Marni was surrounded by the scent of new leather. She concentrated on the country song flowing through the elaborate sound system. At least they still had the same taste in music, she mused, wondering when Cole had stopped listening to the heavier rock music of their younger days.

“Where are we going?” she asked, noting they were leaving the downtown area.

“A little place I found. I think you‘ll like it,” he told her while he guided the Jag onto the freeway on ramp.

About twenty minutes later, Cole pulled into a hamburger stand. Waitresses dressed in short spandex skirts and T-shirts a size too small roller-skated around the cars. Cole pulled into one of the parking slots, killed the engine and rolled down the window.

“This is it?” Marni asked incredulously, unfastening her seat belt. She wasn‘t certain what she‘d expected. A dark restaurant, maybe. Candlelight, perhaps. Certainly not a drive-in with carhops.

Cole shrugged, his expression noncommittal. “I thought you‘d like it.” He unfastened his own safety belt, then turned the key in the ignition so they could listen to the stereo as they ate.