Passport to Happiness

‘That’s it then, you’re all set for the time being.’ She smiles at me as she pulls up her goggles and reaches for her poles. ‘You’ve got enough basics now to enjoy the bunny hill for the rest of your stay. Did you say you’re off home tomorrow or was it Friday?’

‘Tomorrow morning actually.’ I shuffle alongside her, watching as she effortlessly seems to glide. ‘It’s been a great break but reality beckons. Back to the grind I go.’ Laughing lightly, I feel a sense of dread at the thought of home and the mountain of work that awaits.

‘Reality is what you make it,’ she says matter-of-factly, turning to me with a bemused expression. ‘I couldn’t imagine being back in Russia or doing any other job but this. I really enjoy my life here.’

Following her gaze, I stare at the expanse of snow-tipped mountains surrounding us, against the backdrop of an icy blue sky etched with sun rays. ‘It’s picture perfect here. You’re really lucky.’

Elena shakes her head, a wry smile on her face. ‘Luck doesn’t have anything to do with it. I just worked hard and took the risk to come here. Life is only ever about the risks you’re prepared to take. In my case, it paid off.’

Chastised, I nod my head in agreement. ‘You’re right. I guess I need to start taking some more risks then!’ Smiling, I turn in the direction of Café Matterhorn. ‘Thanks for your help with the lessons. Sorry for being a bit useless.’

‘Not at all useless!’ She laughs. ‘But perhaps just not a natural.’ She grins and pushes off with her poles. ‘Enjoy the rest of your holiday.’

The warmth of the café hits me as I take refuge inside. Shaking off my jacket, I slot myself into a corner seat and check my mobile. I’m surprised to discover that Tilly has already replied to the catch-up email I’d sent her after my night out with Emir. What with her usually hectic work and social schedule, it’s rare to receive anything back in less than a week. I begin to read and unsurprisingly find myself giggling within seconds. It seems I’m not the only one with a disastrous string of dates of late. By the time I get to the end of the email, she’s picked up on my original hint that I would like to visit her and there’s an overwhelming, eager demand for me to ‘Book that flight ASAP!’

Filled with excitement at the green light to visit her in just a few short months, I’ve barely started typing a response when she appears online and a new message pops up:

‘Can I call if you’re free?’

‘Strange,’ I mutter to myself, wondering if something’s wrong and typing an immediate reply.

‘Yes, I’m free. Call now.’

By my calculations of time difference, she’s mid-morning at work and should be snowed under.

I answer on the second ring, just as a tall thin glass of hot chocolate topped with cream and marshmallows is set down in front of me. ‘Hey, how are you? It’s been a while…’

Tilly’s giggling scoff bounces loudly at me. ‘A while! It’s been about three months since we last spoke. You need to up your game, miss.’

‘I guess I do, but you know how it is, places to go, mountains to see…’ I joke, feeling instant relief that things are fine and she obviously just wants to chat.

‘Sounds like you’re having a great time. Except the bloke part of course. I mean, it’d be nice for one of us to have some decent guy news for once. But no, the world is full of assholes.’

‘Yep, tell me about it.’ I sigh, thinking that if Tilly, with her slim, enviable figure and long, poker-straight brown hair, not to mention endless long legs, can’t meet a decent guy, then I definitely don’t have any chance.

‘So, Switzerland?’ she prompts. ‘Let me guess, you thought the slopes would be full of rich, handsome, single, athletic men?’

‘I haven’t met one.’ I laugh, realising that it’s true. ‘But yeah, Switzerland was a bit of a whim to be honest. I was fed up, Tilly. School’s getting me down a bit and I just needed a break.’

‘God, I know the feeling. I’m under such pressure here at the moment. My boss is being a bit of a bastard too. I swear, he thinks I’m after his job. You should’ve told me when you booked it, I would have joined you.’

Taking of sip of my hot chocolate, I listen as she fills me in on the past couple of months, in turn updating her with my news and most especially, my revelation that I need to be a bit more adventurous and live a more purposeful life.

‘You do! You’re absolutely wasted at that school. For as long as I’ve known you, you’ve put every hour under the sun into giving them 150 per cent and they shaft you every time. I don’t know why you don’t look for a different school.’

‘It’s funny you say that…’ I begin, relaying my findings about teaching internationally and all the opportunities I’d seen online.

‘Oh Everly, you have to do it!’ Tilly cuts in. ‘Coming here to Bermuda was the best decision I ever made. I’ve never been so happy or settled and I can’t imagine what life would be if I hadn’t.’

‘You’re different to me though, you’ve always been more of a risk-taker.’ I say, reminded of Elena the ski instructor’s words. ‘You’ve always applied for jobs beyond your ability, invested in things that others think are nuts and…’

‘And it’s always worked out!’ she replies, exasperation in her voice. ‘It didn’t mean I wasn’t scared or questioning it every time though.’

‘I know,’ I say quietly, knowing it’s true. I remember having to spend many a night encouraging her that her decision to relocate to Bermuda was a good one. ‘I really want to do it.’ I hesitate for a second, thinking of my conversation with Amy. ‘I just don’t know if it’s a mistake to do it at this point.’

As soon as I say the words, I realise that’s what’s holding me back from making serious changes. ‘I mean, I’m thirty-three. Surely, it’s time to be thinking about marriage and babies, not upping my life and beginning from scratch elsewhere.’

‘Oh, quit the crap. You were at the marriage and babies stage with Jay and look where that got you! You’re only thirty-three. So am I for that matter, and I’m in the same boat – single and childless. And we both should know by now that it doesn’t matter where you are, you can’t manipulate meeting the right guy. It’ll happen when it’s supposed to.’

Sighing loudly at the cliché, I roll my eyes. ‘Yes, I know.’

‘Oh god, I’ve got to go,’ Tilly says, her voice hushed in annoyance. ‘My boss is back, and he’s got a right face on him. Promise me you’ll think about the teaching abroad thing though.’ Tilly’s tone is serious.

‘I will.’ Hanging up, I take a long sip of my now-cold hot chocolate and glance at the time. If the last two days has taught me anything, it’s that I’d underestimated the physical toll of skiing and the comatose power of being subjected to continual fresh, mountain air. It’s not the evening for making life-changing decisions. Instead, I decide on heading back to the hotel and a hot bath and room service. My last night in Switzerland will be spent relaxing.

*

‘Plus your lemon cheesecake and your apple crumble with the coconut topping?’

Amy laughs at the other end of the phone. ‘Yep, I’m doing those too. I knew you’d ask. Besides, Lily already made me promise her I’d make them. I swear she takes after you with her love of food.’

‘So what if she does? At least she won’t be a skinny rake like you.’ I listen as Amy huffs and pretends to be insulted but we both know she naturally takes after our super-slim mum. ‘I’ll be at yours for three o’clock then. My flight doesn’t land until one.’

‘Perfect. See you tomorrow. And don’t forget Harry’s magnet.’

‘Of course not.’ I smile and hang up, glancing across to the small metal Swiss flag I’d bought earlier for Harry, my nephew.

Putting my mobile to one side, I shift myself from the bed, tightening the fluffy bathrobe I’ve donned and begin to put my belongings in my small case. It’s only nine o’clock but I’ve decided on an early night. I’ve barely managed to fold three things when a message notification dings loudly. I pad across to the bed and noticing it’s Tilly, scan the content, heart racing as my eyes dance across the words and linger on the final paragraph.

‘It’s a six-month maternity cover at the international school just ten minutes up the road from my place. As I said above, they need someone ASAP so I’ve put your name forward (don’t be mad at me!). I’ve told Carolyn you’ll be in touch with your CV.’

I stop reading as my heart threatens to burst from my chest. ‘She can’t be serious. Surely not?’ I whisper to myself, breathless with anticipation and adrenalin. Before I think twice, I’ve fired off a reply.

‘Oh my god! But where would I even live?? PS. I don’t even know what the pay is!’

It’s less than a minute later and the response makes my breath catch in my throat.

‘You’ll live here with me, of course! As for the pay – it will undoubtedly be at least double that which you’re earning. This is Bermuda baby!!!! It’s going to be awesome. Send that CV!’

‘Oh, my goodness. Are you really going to do this Everly?’ I say aloud, wondering how this has even happened in the space of three hours since our phone call. And what if this is ‘it’. That chance I’ve been looking for to lead me into new circumstances…

It doesn’t take much convincing, and I find myself spending the next hour preparing my CV and trying to ignore the niggling doubts that float through my head, that small voice of insecurity taunting me as I dare to dream that I’ll be successful in the application.

It’s almost midnight by the time I feel confident enough with what I’ve prepared and after taking a deep breath and scrolling back through my messages with Tilly to find Carolyn’s contact email, I copy and paste it into the ‘To’ field, letting my finger hover over the ‘send’ key.

‘Do it Everly, this could your change life.’ I’m aware of the words I’m speaking to myself as I tap on ‘send’ and in a final gesture of hope, close my eyes and send up a silent plea.

‘Please, let this be what I’ve been waiting for.’

And that’s all I can do now. Wait.

Chapter 5

‘Are you out of your flipping mind?’ Amy looks at me incredulously and Lily stares wide-eyed, her spoon mid-air. ‘What will you do with your place? Not to mention the fact you’ll be a maternity cover.’ She purposely says the word slowly, empathising her point. ‘It’s ridiculous, you’re going to be giving up your entire life and security for a six-month jolly in the sunshine. And then what?’

I open my mouth to respond but she’s not yet finished. ‘I’ll tell you what. Then you’ll be back here with your tail between your legs with no job and nowhere to live. That’s what.’

‘But I’ll have an amazing tan?’ I venture, wondering why on earth she’s so riled up and trying lightly to defuse the situation. Fair enough, I hadn’t expected Amy to take the news of my application breezily, but I wasn’t expecting such harsh reality either.

‘This isn’t a joking matter, Everly.’ She looks at me earnestly and I feel myself relenting. ‘I just don’t want to see you throw away what you think is a boring life, for something that is only a short-term fix.’

She has a point. But I’m not about to let her know that. I’ve spent the last seven hours contemplating how I really feel about this opportunity. Yes, it’s great in theory and it is everything I could have hoped for, but I also can’t help but wonder if I might be making an impulsive, irrational decision. On the other hand, I’ve just recounted my entire Switzerland trip to Amy and mused about how much fun I had, how enlivened I felt and how many opportunities popped up as a result of that impromptu journey.

Sighing, I try not to let her negativity rub off on me. ‘Well, I’ve only put my CV forward at this stage. It’s not like they’ve actually offered me the job. So maybe it’s best we shelve this whole idea until I get an answer.’ I pick up the serving spoon and cut myself a large second helping of crumble, winking at Lily as I do so and noting her best efforts to stuff the last spoonful of cream into her mouth. ‘Besides, I’m certain they’ll have loads of applicants already in Bermuda and won’t even need anybody flown in from overseas.’

‘That’s true. You probably won’t get it anyway,’ Amy says, standing as she picks up her plate. ‘Oh, and before I forget…’ She stops talking and scoops up crumbs from the table with a used napkin. ‘Jack wants to know when you’re free for this get-together with his colleague?’

‘Not interested.’ I try not to show my exasperation, but I feel my frown deepening, boring yet more lines into my forehead. Gee, thanks Aim.

‘Oh, don’t be like that. This could be the man of your dreams.’ I watch as Amy turns towards the sink and then glance at Lily and roll my eyes. She smiles back in amusement, knowing full well her mother is annoying me. Unaware, Amy carries on. ‘Anyway, stop getting so bitter about men. Jay might have ruined your life as you always put it, but you’re lucky to be able to jet off on holiday and be wined and dined. Even if you often meet losers, you still get to have fun.’

There’s really no point arguing with my sister about this, she’s clearly on a mission to keep me working locally or marrying me off to whoever will have me. It doesn’t appear to have sunk in to her brain that I’m unhappy with the way things are going. In her eyes, I’m free, independent and able to do as I please. Therefore, I’m not allowed to be disgruntled with life.

‘Oh, you never told me about Natalie?’ Deciding to change the subject, I stand up from the table, collecting the remaining empty bowls as I do so. I hear my mobile ring in my bag on the adjacent worktop just as Amy launches into her story, so I ignore it. It’s an hour later by the time the washing up is done and we’ve finished discussing the ins and outs of Amy’s neighbour’s marriage.

‘Auntie Everly, do you want to watch Barbie’s vacation with me?’ Lily asks, padding back into the kitchen in her unicorn motif pyjamas.

I glance at the clock, knowing that if I don’t make a move soon, I’ll have limited time to prep for the start of school next week. ‘Sorry darling, I’ve got to go home now. But I’ll see you next weekend and we can watch it then, yeah?’

‘Okay then.’ Lily pulls a disappointed expression that tugs on my heartstrings and for a brief moment I long for a little Lily of my own.

Grabbing my bag from the worktop, I bend down to kiss my little blonde niece on the head. ‘Bye darling. Don’t forget to give your brother his magnet.’

‘Actually, they should be home from football practice soon,’ Amy says, looking at her watch as we walk to the front door.

‘Thanks for dinner.’ I lean in to hug her slim frame. ‘Tell Jack I said hello and give Harry a kiss from me.’

‘I will do.’

Opening the door, I’m not surprised to see the beginning drizzle of rainfall. Pulling my cardigan tightly around me, I run to my car, thinking of all the things I still need to do when I get home – namely, unpack. I sigh at the mundaneness. So much for an exciting Friday night.

By the time I get home my head is imploding with the to-do list of things that need to be addressed. School starts back up on Monday and even though I’ve got the entire weekend, I’m way behind. Panicked, I put the kettle on and decide a coffee is in order.

My phone beeps and I’m suddenly reminded of the missed call from earlier. Retrieving it from my bag, I glance at the display and my stomach jumps into my throat. There’s a missed call and a voice message from an international number. It can only mean one thing. Quickly calling my voicemail, I place my mobile on loudspeaker, setting it down on the dining table.

‘Hello Ms Carter, this is Carolyn Smith from Bermuda International School. I’ve received your resume in response to the maternity vacancy we are looking to fill, and I’d be very interested to talk with you further regarding this. Please can you call me at your earliest opportunity.’

Hands shaking, I glace at time on my screen – 7.30 p.m. – and calculate that it’s still only early afternoon in Bermuda. Without letting my nerves get the better of me, I decide it’s now or never. Pressing the call button, I hold my breath and cross my fingers.

It only takes three rings before it’s answered.

*

‘Why are you packing that?’ Cynical, Amy shakes her head and tuts.

‘Can you stop interfering in my clothes choices and instead take those bags out to the hall?’ I nod at the two holdalls that are blocking the doorway of Lily’s bedroom. AKA my temporary bedroom of late.

‘You’re going there to work though, not to go clubbing.’

Sighing, I don’t rise to the bait. For the fiftieth time this morning, she seems to want to remind me that my new job in Bermuda is solely for work, no fun allowed. She’s wrong though. Tilly’s already got loads of events lined up. She’s even decked out the spare room for me. Still, I won’t be telling Amy that – it’ll only annoy her even more. She already thinks I’m insane, irresponsible and reckless to have accepted this job. It’s been made worse by the fact that I decided to rent out my flat, fully-furnished, on a yearly contract. It’s taken her the last two weeks to come to terms with the fact that I’m OK with someone else using my sofa, and no, I won’t be homeless if I come back early, because there’s always our parents to stay with, or even here until I sort something.

‘Are you really sure about this, Everly?’

Trying not to roll my eyes, I finish packing the final pair of shoes into my suitcase. ‘Yep, I’m certain. And please can you quit asking me because even if I did have doubts – which I don’t by the way – it’s a bit late to be backing out now. I’ve already left my job, my flat, basically my life here and my flight is less than twelve hours away. It’s a done deal.’

I still can’t get my head around the turn of events. I went from phoning Carolyn back, to being interviewed the very same evening via Skype and offered the job. Luckily for me, my skillset in my particular curriculum had been hard to find locally. And even more surprising, I’d been the only overseas applicant – owing to Tilly giving me the heads up before they’d officially had time to advertise. The salary and package had been an even bigger incentive than the picturesque photos I’d browsed of the school location. It was double and a half what I was earning, plus a relocation package and inclusive flights. There was absolutely no way I was going to say no. Even if this just turns out to be six months of a new life, surely that’s better than six months of same old? Besides, it’s my new mantra to be more of a yes to adventure person.

Marching back into the room, Amy watches as I secure my case. ‘Are you going to eat dinner with us?’

‘Of course, unless you plan to turf me out early with an empty stomach?!’ Laughing, I stand up and take in her drawn, anxious expression. ‘Oh Aim, come here.’ Stepping towards her, I take her into a bear hug and stroke her back. ‘You need to stop mothering me, I’m going to be absolutely fine and Tilly will look after me.’ Releasing her, I notice the tears in her eyes.

‘I’m just going to miss you. I’ve gotten so used to you being nearby since you and Jay split.’ She looks at me shyly and takes a deep breath. ‘I guess, I just don’t want you to leave because then I’ve lost my best friend.’

‘I’m going to miss you too, you silly moo, but six months will pass so quickly.’ Lily bounds into the room and giggles at us both standing face to face holding hands.

‘Can I join in?’ She’s clutching a raggedy teddy and with her sweet little toothless grin, I feel my heart melt.

‘Of course, let’s all do a group hug,’ I say, smiling at Amy as we huddle together. It’s just moments later that we break off as the doorbell rings and they rush off to answer it, leaving me alone in the bedroom.

Before I can help myself, I wipe a tear away from my eye. I am going to miss the children and Amy so much, despite the newness that lies ahead. If I’m honest with myself, they’ve been the ones that have filled the void of Jay since he left. They’ve been the support I needed and relied on. What if it is a mistake to leave?

Dismissing the thought, I instead tell myself that the heavens must have a plan for me. Just like the song says…

Because if it wasn’t for that awful date with Florian, for the impromptu, ill-thought out trip to Switzerland, for Frederick, even for Emir making me realise it’s not about finding love just yet, but about trying to discover more purpose and fulfilment – there wouldn’t be a new life waiting for me in Bermuda, would there?

Everything is just the way it’s supposed to be and I’m going to trust that the new adventure I was hoping for, has begun. I pick up my case and half-drag, half-carry it to the hallway, my stomach fizzing with nerves and excitement.

I notice my bikini on the radiator and quickly retrieve it and shove it into my holdall. Who’d have thought I’d end up working in a place where rich people holiday? Smiling to myself I make my way to kitchen, trying not to get carried away with thoughts of myself beaching and boating.

It’s Everly dream come true…

*

I draw in a sharp breath. ‘Wow, it’s out of this world, absolutely stunning.’ But even that doesn’t feel quite enough to describe the view. Crystal clear turquoise water shimmers along the horizon in front of me, the sweet smell of sea and heat filling my nostrils. I’m unable to draw my eyes away, but I’m aware of my cardigan clinging to me and discreetly notice sweat patches already forming on my top. ‘Gosh, it’s so hot.’

Tilly laughs and brushes a stray hair from her face. ‘It’s the humidity that gets us here. It’s intense. Hope you thought to bring light clothing.’

We stop at a traffic light and I marvel at how tropical everything looks. Lush greenery and colourful plantation greet me everywhere I look. Houses with white pitched roofs painted in every pastel colour imaginable line the horizon at varying levels. It’s an assortment of colour and beauty, and I’m full of delight as the road leads us closer to the sea, it’s shimmering vivid, intense blue-green allure causing me to smile. ‘It’s so beautiful, I’m never going to want to leave.’

‘You will, give it a couple of months and you’ll have rock fever. You’ll be itching for fast-paced civilisation and better shopping like most ex-pats.’ She grins and turns back to the wheel. ‘I can’t actually believe you’re here, you know.’

Laughing, I drink in the scenery as we pass a stately mansion and a group of businessmen in braces and Bermuda shorts. ‘Neither can I. Thank god I don’t start work until next week, I will need at least a week to settle in and find my way around.’

‘Well, don’t get too comfy, I’ve already got us a night out planned for later. Don’t think you’re in for a tea and sofa evening. No way, missy!’ Tilly grins, flashing her overly white teeth at me and I know for sure that means she’s arranged something epic.

The thing is, until Tilly arrived at airport to collect me, I’d sort of forgotten just how animated she is. There’s this crazy vibe about her, the type of energy that is both magnetic and slightly unhinged. In the past I’ve seen her go from overly excited to wildly depressive within minutes. It’s hard not to want to be around her – she’s infectious with her zest for life and living to the full. However, I know I also need to try to keep a bit of distance from her unrestrained antics, especially if Bermuda is going to be my new home. Tilly isn’t always the best influence…

‘And tomorrow I thought we could have a beach day?’ She’s looking at me zealously again. ‘I’ve also got to walk down to the marina to check on my new boat.’

My eyes open wide in shock. I’m confused. ‘A boat? You bought a boat?!’ I turn to her, noticing that the car is slowly stopping, and she’s clicked on the indicator to turn left. ‘And aren’t you supposed to be working tomorrow?”

She shrugs and dismisses me with a wave of the hand. ‘Meh, work schmerk. And yes, I bought a boat. It seemed a waste for me to have a free marina space with my apartment and not make use of it.’