Getting Rowdy

“I’m not upset!”

At her raised voice, he lifted a brow.

Inhaling in a bid to regain control, Avery said more calmly, “What you do in your own time is your own business.”

“That was my own time—time I wanted to spend with you, but you weren’t interested.”

Dropping the shirts, Avery propped her hands on her hips. “That’s your excuse?”

He eased closer. “Sorry, honey, but I don’t need an excuse.” Oh-so-gently, he smoothed back a curl that had escaped her ponytail. “I’m a grown man, it’s my bar and I wasn’t expecting anyone to show up so early, especially not you.”

“Perfect!” She snatched up the shirts again, anxious to be on her way. “I guess that’s settled then.”

Rowdy caught her arm. “Hold up.” She started to jerk free, until he said, “Come on, Avery, give me a chance to explain.”

It wasn’t the smartest move, because every second with him chipped away at her resistance, but she paused anyway.

“All right, let’s hear it.” This ought to be good.

But then again, maybe not.

* * *

TO GIVE HIMSELF a moment to think, Rowdy took the garments from Avery and tossed them back on the table. With her looking so mulish—and so damned cute—he would have preferred backing her up to the wall and following his instincts instead of talking.

But he could just imagine how she’d react to that.

Rubbing a hand over the back of his neck, he tried to figure out what to say, and how to say it.

Overflowing with belligerence, Avery crossed her arms. “Any day now.”

“Give me a second, will you?” He propped a hip on the tabletop and scrutinized her. “You might not know this, but I’ve never explained myself to a woman before. That is, a woman other than my sister. But even with Pepper, it was generalizations. Never anything detailed about when, where or with who I had sex.”

Avery bristled. “You don’t have to explain to me, either.”

“I think I do, but it’s complicated by the fact that you work for me.”

When he said no more, she lifted her chin. “How so?”

Rowdy had never had a problem with plain speaking. He saw no reason to start complicating things now. “I have a major jones for you, Avery. You know that.”

Her jaw loosened. “Oh, my God. You are so—”

“But as your employer,” he interrupted, “I could cross a line here if I’m not careful.”

She choked. “Seriously, Rowdy? This is you being careful?”

To hell with it. Brushing his knuckles over her cheek, down her throat, he said, “I want you. All the fucking time.” Even when I’m with other women. He opened his hand on her shoulder, urged her closer. “And it’s not going away anytime soon.”

She softened the tiniest bit, but still said, “Looked to me like it went away just fine this morning.”

Seeing the hurt she tried to hide with sarcasm, he shook his head. “No, honey, not even close.”

Her mouth tightened. “So your date was just—”

“You’re confusing things now. I don’t date. What you saw was sex, plain and simple.”

“Oh, my God.” She pressed her hands to his chest, but not with any real conviction at pushing him away. “I don’t want to hear this.”

“She knew what it was.” Rowdy easily held on to her. “I didn’t sugarcoat things, and she agreed one hundred percent.”

Anger darkened her blue eyes and lowered her voice to a rasp. “I can’t imagine why you’re telling me this.”

Because what you think of me matters. Rowdy slid his hand to the back of her neck, keeping her near. “I get the feeling you saw me with her and you took it personally.”

“Your ego is showing.”

Knowing he’d hit a nerve, Rowdy dipped his head, brushed his nose over her hair. “You think it was a rejection or something.” He inhaled her scent, and tightened all over. God Almighty, the way she stirred him...

“Honestly,” Avery whispered, “I don’t know what to think.”

“Think about saying yes instead of no.”

She drew back a small fist and punched his ribs.

Grinning, Rowdy hugged her. After the long day at work, it felt better than good to hold her. “I shouldn’t tease?”

“Definitely not.”

“Okay.” He kissed her temple and leaned her back so he could see her face. “Seriously then, I’m sorry if it hurt you in any way. Never my intent, believe me.”

She looked up at him, her blue eyes big and soft, her hands now curled into his shirt—holding on to him. “Then why did you do it?”

At least she wasn’t storming off, Rowdy told himself. She sounded far more reasonable than he could have hoped for. “I didn’t want her in my new place, and she didn’t have any privacy in hers.”

Eyes flaring, Avery finally shoved him away. “Ass!”

To be on the safe side, Rowdy moved to lean in the doorway, but she didn’t try to leave.

She only went to the other side of the table—out of his reach. “That’s not what I meant. Yes, I’m surprised you’d do such a thing here at work. But I was asking...” She shook her head. “Never mind.”

No, he wouldn’t let her do that. “Why was I with her in the first place?”

After a long hesitation, she gave one sharp nod.

He didn’t want to detail the extent of his own failings, but he also didn’t want to end the night with her pissed off. He considered making up a believable story, but he knew he wouldn’t lie to her.

What he saw in her beautiful eyes touched him.

She wanted him to have a good excuse because she wanted a reason to give in to him.

To chase off his personal demons, he’d spent the night in a sexual marathon. He should have been well spent, and he had been.

Before Avery.

But now, with her so close, being alone with her, seeing that particular look in her eyes, he instead felt like he’d spent a month being celibate.

He’d tell her the basics and it’d have to be enough. “Women have usually come easy to me.”

“There’s a newsflash.”

From the day they’d met, before he’d bought the bar, Avery had seen him picking up women. Not something he was proud of, but not really anything he’d try to hide, either. He was a grown man and he more than enjoyed sex.

Determined to stay on track, Rowdy ignored the gibe. “When I get turned down, it doesn’t matter.”

“Why would it?” Like an accusation, she said, “There’s always another woman waiting.”

He shrugged, accepting the inaccurate claim. “That’s not the point.” Once again, he moved toward her. He couldn’t seem to help himself. From day one, Avery had drawn him, not just physically but in other, more disturbing ways—ways he didn’t want to analyze too closely. “I’ll try to explain if you let me.”

She crossed her arms. “I’m all ears.”

No, she was all backbone and pride and, even when trying to conceal it, hot sensuality. “When I get turned down, and believe me, I do, it doesn’t matter because I don’t care enough for it to matter.”

She half turned away. “Guess I should remember that, huh?”

Rowdy brought her back around, and though it unnerved him, he admitted the truth. “With you, it matters.”

She searched his face, but wasn’t convinced. “That’d be easier to believe if I hadn’t busted you just this morning.”

He needed to get her past that. “I needed a distraction, that’s all.”

Dubious, she asked, “Sex?”

“Best distraction I’ve ever found.” He’d still been in his early teens when he’d learned that girls brought light to the darkest shadows. He’d always been big for his age, always looked older, and girls had taken his quiet, cautious nature as maturity.

While other boys were busy playing ball or...fuck, maybe G.I. Joe for all he knew, he’d been running interference for his little sister. He’d defended her verbally, and when that didn’t work, he’d protected her physically. For as long as he could remember, he’d done his best to shelter Pepper from the reality of their lives—which often meant accepting the brunt of the abuse himself. As a result, turmoil sometimes exploded inside him.

Thanks to a high school cheerleader, he’d lost his virginity at fifteen. What an eye-opener that had been. He’d learned that grinding release had a profound way of emptying his mind and body of pent-up tension. With sex as a stress reliever, he could cope with whatever life threw at him.

But none of that had anything to do with Avery.

“Rowdy?”

That gentler tone set him on edge. She’d watched him get lost in thought, and damn it, he never did that. Definitely not with women. “What?”

“Is something wrong with the bar?” Concern softened her expression. She touched his arm. “With you?”

“No.” Did she honestly think he’d go mewling to a woman if he did have a problem?

“Then why did you need a distraction?”

Damn it. He’d said too much. “It’s getting late.” He checked the time. “You’re going to miss that bus if we don’t get moving.”

“Oh, shoot!” Jumping away from him, she shrugged into her lightweight jacket and gathered the new shirts and aprons together. After slinging her purse strap over her shoulder, she rushed to the break room door and...hesitated. “Are you leaving now, too?”

Right behind her, Rowdy took the shirts from her. “I’ll walk you out.”

Her shoulders loosened. “Great. Thanks.”

Expecting an argument more than easy acceptance, Rowdy asked with suspicion, “How often do you take the bus?”

“Always.”

So night after night she left on her own? At two in the morning? And here he’d always thought her so sensible. Had he known, he’d have been walking her out every night.

They weren’t in the best area, and even though the street never completely emptied of passersby, it could still be dangerous for a woman alone. There were a lot of alleyways, parked cars and deserted buildings where a woman could disappear.

Since he’d locked up earlier, Rowdy turned off the remaining lights as they went to the back door. He couldn’t quite keep the irritation out of his tone when he asked, “Is there a reason you take the bus?”

“Yup.”

While waiting for her to expound on that, he opened the door, stepped out with her and then locked it up again. When she said nothing more, he prompted, “Care to share?”

“Sure.” Already striding ahead, she said over her shoulder, “Soon as you tell me why you needed a distraction.”

So he hadn’t thrown her off the track at all, huh? Avery wasn’t like other women. She wouldn’t take a hint, and she sure as hell didn’t defer to his wishes.

Taking several long steps, Rowdy reached her as she headed to the bus stop at the front of the bar. Unfortunately, at least from her point of view, the bus had just turned a corner and was disappearing from sight.

“Great.” She glanced around in what looked like worry, then dropped onto a bench, opened her purse and started digging around.

Rowdy stood over her. “What are you doing?”

“Finding my phone so I can call a cab.”

Not happening. “Why don’t you be reasonable instead and let me drive you home?”

She found her phone and lifted it out.

“Avery.” Crouching down in front of her, Rowdy took her small hands in his. She was so petite, so fine-boned and feminine.

“What?” Something showed in her eyes, maybe anxiety. Possibly even fear.

Protective instincts jumped to the forefront of his brain. “You don’t trust me?”

“It’s not that.”

“Then what?”

Slumping back, she gave him a narrow-eyed glare. “If you have to know, I’m not sure I trust myself.”

Now, that was interesting. “You mean with me?”

Grudgingly, she muttered, “You are a temptation.”

Still? Even after she’d busted him getting head from a one-night stand? That surprised Rowdy, and sent a rush of lust through his bloodstream. “Then...”

She got huffy. “Get real, Rowdy. All the women want you.”

Her perceptions of him were a bit skewed, but why disillusion her? “Not all.”

Chin up, she stated, “I won’t be just another body in a long line of one-night stands.”

Like one night would even come close to taking the edge off. And yeah, that was unusual. One night was normally more than enough...with other women.

Apparently not with Avery.

As independent as she might be, his little bartender had a very old-fashioned way of looking at things. “Why not look at it as mutual fun?” He gave her his most wolfish smile. “We both know eventually you’ll be in my bed.”

“Really?” Never one to disappoint, Avery said, “Why don’t you hold your breath waiting for that to happen?”

He laughed, kissed her knuckles and said, “Just for that, I’m going to make you ask real pretty.”

“That,” she said, “isn’t going to happen. The other... Well, I have enough common sense to know I don’t want to go there.” Her gaze dipped to his mouth, and she sighed. “Not yet.”

Not yet? Meaning... “Maybe soon?”

She shrugged.

Well, that had his dick perking up. In some instances, a shrug was as good as a resounding affirmation. His shoulders knotted with restraint, but he managed to say, “Okay, then,” without too much satisfaction.

He’d sort through things, figure out her reasons for waiting and find a way around them. But until then, he didn’t want to scare her off. “Let’s agree that there’s no reason for you to splurge on a cab. I made you miss the bus, so I’ll see you home.”

She studied the moon shadows lurking between buildings, frowned at a few dark cars parked near the curb. A stranger walked up the street, head down, hands in his pockets.

On a deep breath, Avery checked her watch—and bit her lip.

Taking that as another sign of agreement, Rowdy rose to his feet again. “It’s late. No way will I leave you out here alone, so run up to my apartment with me, okay? I’ll grab my car keys.” He took one step off the curb, ready to cross the street—and realized that Avery hadn’t moved. He turned back to her. “Coming?”

Clutching her purse, she stared at him with confusion. “I don’t understand.”

With anticipation surging, he turned to face her. “About?”

“So many things...” She looked up and down the street again, at a few people loitering on the corner, back at the bar. After palpable hesitation, she rose from the bench and approached him.

“Like?” He watched her eyes and saw her sort through a dozen issues before settling on one.

“Where exactly is your apartment?”

“Right here.” Rowdy indicated the big brick building on the opposite side of the street from the bar. “I just moved in a week ago.”

CHAPTER THREE

IT HAD BEEN a very long day, but Avery wasn’t tired. Not anymore. While watching the bus leave her behind, she’d experienced an odd disquiet.

Not because of Rowdy. Even when he tried to be intimidating, his presence provided only reassurance. He wouldn’t hurt her, and he wouldn’t let anyone else hurt her.

But someone had been nearby, watching her, waiting. She shivered in dread. She wanted to blame it on bad memories, on dread from that earlier phone call, but she knew better. She’d learned to trust her instincts.

And her instincts told her the night wasn’t safe.

Now, trailing behind Rowdy, her hand held in his, she worried that she might be leading trouble to his door. He could handle it, of that she had no doubt.

But her problems were her own, and she didn’t want them dumped on him.

Looking back again, she still saw nothing.

“Worried someone will see you with me?” He shifted his hand to the small of her back and urged her inside.

She was, but not for the reasons he thought. “I heard something,” she lied. She’d heard only her own turbulent thoughts.

Taking her seriously, he glanced back, his gaze searching everywhere. A few doors down, a couple got into a car and pulled away. Across the street, three men laughed drunkenly as they made their way down the sidewalk. In the distance, a siren whined and a dog barked.

Seeming distracted, he murmured, “The night echoes everything and makes it sound closer than it is.” After another scrutiny of the area, he turned back to her. “You don’t need to be nervous with me.”

“If you say so.”

The building they entered used to be a warehouse, but had since been divided into four rental units. It had a certain industrial appeal, with concrete interior walls, metal stairs and open ceilings. Overall, it suited Rowdy, being strong and sturdy like him, but also polished in a nice way.

“I’m on the second floor.”

Avery looked up to a huge skylight in the very high ceiling. “Wow.” Holding on to the welded handrails, she went ahead of Rowdy up the open, diamond-plate stair treads. Everywhere she looked, she saw something cool, like the exposed ductwork and pipes.

“This way.” Rowdy took her to a thick steel door, opened several locks, pushed the heavy door open and flipped on overhead fluorescent lights.

They stepped into a small landing above the rest of the living area. Following Rowdy down four clattering metal steps brought her to a sparse sitting area that held a worn couch and chair, one table and lamp, and a moderately sized flat screen television on an entertainment stand.

Only the television looked new.

Beyond that, at the far side of the room, freestanding L-shaped bookshelves formed a wall to separate the kitchen and laundry area on the left from the bed, dresser and nightstand on the right. Avery assumed the one and only closed door led to a bathroom.

She took in the wall of tall arched windows that would overlook his bar, then to the polished wood-plank floors.

“It was close,” Rowdy said, as if defending his choice.

“It’s pretty impressive actually.” Especially compared to where she now lived. She touched a thick round metal support beam in the middle of the floor. “Doing a little pole dancing of your own?”

He crossed his arms. “No, but if you feel like giving it a try, go ahead. I’ll wait.”

She fought off a grin. “No thanks.”

“Spoilsport.” He headed off to the kitchen area.

Still taking in the uniqueness of his apartment, Avery said, “Know what I don’t understand?”

“I can guess.” His boots made little noise on the thick floors. “You’re wondering why I didn’t just hook up here, instead of in my office.”

It did make her very curious. “Wouldn’t it have been a lot more...convenient?” He had a bed at his disposal instead of a desk chair. Not that he’d let it hinder him, from what she’d seen.

“Probably,” he agreed. “But I didn’t want her in my place.” He flipped a switch and more light spilled from the kitchen.

Avery realized that not only could he see his bar, but now, with the bright lights on inside, anyone on the street would be able to see him, too. She made sure to stay out of view. “Why not?”

From the counter, he lifted a set of keys. “I’m private, that’s why.”

Unbelievable. “You could have been a lot more private here than in your office!” While Avery found his living space pretty awesome, it was bare-bones, not a single personal item on display. No photos, not even of his sister. That disappointed her. She’d never met Pepper, and she was very curious.

He did have a nice display of books on his bookshelves.

“I told you, I wasn’t expecting anyone to show up.” He returned to her, the keys jangling in his hand. “This is the first permanent place I’ve had. Before this, it was rotating motel rooms. If I took a woman there, no big deal because by the next day I’d be gone.”

So no woman would be able to track him down? That attitude concerned her, but wondering where he’d moved, and why, took precedence. “Gone where?”

“It’s a long story.” He tried to steer her back to the stairs.

Avery held on to the pole, resisting him.

He eyed her, worked his jaw and said, “You’re not going to let it go, are you?”

This might be her best chance to get insight into his background. How could she pass that up? “Is it a big secret?” she teased. “Were you on the run from the law? Dodging child support? A transient?”

Rowdy narrowed his eyes—and stalked toward her. “On the run, yeah. But not from the law.”

“Seriously?” That so surprised her that it took her a moment to see that particular look in his eyes. She’d only seen it a few times—right before he’d kissed her. One of those times happened while hiding him in a storage closet at the bar because a gang of ruffians wanted to take him apart.

Since then, he’d only stolen a kiss or two—and she always craved more. Dangerous.

But maybe that incident was indicative of his life. “Do you always have people after you?”

“Often enough.”

He said that without jest! Hastily, Avery back-stepped behind the pole, considered going farther, but really, where did she have to go? The couch was against the wall, the chair too far away....

Catching her wrist and pulling her around to him, Rowdy said softly, “Don’t run from me.”

“I wasn’t.” But her heart pumped as if she’d been on a five-minute sprint.

With the back of one finger, he caressed the pulse in her throat. “Fibber.”

“I’m not afraid of you.” Whatever secrets Rowdy had in his history, he wasn’t a threat to her. She’d known dishonorable men, and she knew Rowdy was different. “Maybe you’re the one who should stop running.”

“From you?”

Was she chasing him? Mmm...pretty much. Until now, she just hadn’t realized it. “Yes.”

His gaze warmed. “I don’t run from anyone.”

Knowing it would spur him on, she whispered, “Good.”

But when he started to pull her against him, she flattened both hands to his chest.

He drew in a breath. “No?”

Disappointment kept her voice low. “You were with another woman just this morning.”

He looked struck, almost like he’d forgotten. “Yeah, sorry.” Releasing her, he stepped away. “Guess for a woman like you, that puts a damper on things?”

For other women it wouldn’t? She curled her lip. “Yeah, afraid so.” But she wished it was otherwise. “Why were you on the run?”

Resigned, he said, “It had nothing to do with dodging my duty, so forget that.”

“No little Rowdys running around?”

“Hell, no. I’m always careful, but if it did happen, you can bet I wouldn’t bail on them.”

She believed him. From what she’d seen so far, Rowdy never shirked his responsibility, whatever he decided his responsibility might be. “Okay.”

Maybe thinking she mocked him, he studied her a moment before being satisfied with her sincerity. “I would never do that to a kid.”

Hands behind her, she leaned back against the pole. “So...why did you move around?”

“Mostly because the idea of settling down never appealed to me.”

“Wanderlust?” Before her life had taken such a drastic turn, she’d enjoyed traveling everywhere in the States and often around the world. Before she was twenty, she’d already been to more than two dozen hot tourist spots.

“Hardly. I stayed in the area.”

“The area being Ohio?”

He shrugged. “My sister was here. Still is, but now she’s with Logan and she doesn’t need...” He stopped, cursed low and let out a long breath. Indicating the couch, he said, “If we’re going to do this, you want to sit down?”

“This, meaning talk?”

His mouth quirked. “Unless you have something else on your mind.”

She had all kinds of things on her mind, but none of them were appropriate. “Talk it is.”

“Then I’ll give you my bare-bones history.”

Jumping on that promise, Avery headed for the couch. “Why only the bare bones?”

Rowdy sat close beside her and stretched out one arm along the back of the couch. “It’s a long story, it’ll be morning soon and I don’t feel like rehashing it all.”

“I suppose you’re tired.” From what she could tell, he’d been up all night. If he’d slept at all, it would only have been for a few hours before coming in to work again. That should have made her feel guilty for keeping him awake, but she remembered why he hadn’t slept and it irked her.