The Real Mr Right

“Thanks for the vote of confidence,” Kelly said drily, then finally sat on the very edge of the sofa, jerking a limp red curl behind her ear. Her mouth pressed flat for a moment before she said, very softly, “I’m scared.”

Point to him. “For you? The kids—?”

“Both.”

“Your ex hurt you?” When her eyes shot to his, he said, “You started to say something. Earlier.”

“Right.” She blew a short, humorless laugh through her nose. “Depends on how you define hurt.”

Matt released a slow, controlled breath. “You have custody?”

Nodding, she rubbed her hands against her jeans. “Except Rick is not happy about that. At all. Sure, he has visitation, but more and more he keeps showing up unannounced to see the kids. At first I let it go, thinking at least it showed he cared. That he’s trying.” Her mouth thinned again. “But even before tonight, it was unsettling. For the kids, I mean. Well, me, too...”

She mashed her lips together. “The frustration, the hurt, the anger—I understand that. Rick has every right to be disappointed. To be bitter. Hey, I’m pretty bitter and disappointed, too. I did love him,” she said, her eyes filling. “With all my heart. But the day came when I realized that love alone wasn’t enough to fix our broken marriage.”

If it was one thing Matt had learned in his work, it was that one rarely got a straight shot at the truth, that more likely than not there’d be a few side trips along the way. But without those side trips, you were likely to miss something crucial. “Broken how?”

Kelly leaned back, grabbing a throw off the sofa’s arm to wrap up in. “We met in college. Dated for... Gosh. Four or five years before we got engaged. Didn’t get married for another year after that. Certainly long enough that I felt pretty sure Rick was, well, normal. He was... He made me feel secure. Safe. Like...” She sighed. “Like my dad used to. Over and over, Rick assured me that I could lean on him, that’s what he was there for.

“And he was a good provider. A good dad. We were happy. For a while, anyway. He is—or at least was—a gifted salesman. And I was good with being a stay-at-home mom. I even liked my in-laws,” she said with a flicker of a smile. “Except, when...when Aislin was about six months old, Rick lost his job. And another one didn’t exactly land in his lap. I’d been doing a few small catering jobs here and there—mostly friends of his parents, that sort of thing—so I figured that was as good a time as any to expand. I had a little money, from my dad’s life insurance policy, so I invested it in my business.” Alf switched allegiances, chuffing over to rest her chin on Kelly’s knee. She smiled, plowing her fingers through the dog’s thick fur. “It blossomed, more than I could’ve dreamed. But Rick...”

Her hand fisted. “Instead of supporting my work—which was keeping us from losing the house—he resented my success. I don’t doubt,” she quickly added, “that his pride had taken a huge hit, that he was hurting because he couldn’t keep his promise to provide for us. Having watched my father go through the same thing when he got sick, I understood that. But...”

Kelly folded her legs underneath her to prop her elbows on her knees, leaning her head in her hands. “I didn’t want a divorce. Not for a long time. Especially after Rick’s father died and I didn’t want to cause him any more pain. And in any case, I kept thinking—” dropping her hands, she sighed “—that this was one of those ‘or worse’ times and that somehow, we’d work through it. He was my husband, Matt,” she said at Matt’s pissed sigh, briefly meeting his gaze. “The man I’d promised to love no matter what...”

For a moment, she seemed to disappear inside herself, then said, very softly, “And it wasn’t as if we hadn’t weathered rough patches before. Except then,” she said on another sigh, “Rick started drinking more than usual. And his behavior became more...irrational. He’d either fly off the handle over nothing—especially to Coop, who he’d pick on mercilessly—or sink into this bottomless depression that was almost worse than the anger. And when Coop’s grades started to slip, when he started overeating...”

A sad smile preceded what she said next. “I finally told Rick it was over, I was done trying to hold our marriage together single-handedly. But until I actually handed him the divorce papers I’m sure he thought I was bluffing.”

“How long ago was this?”

“Almost three years.” Her eyes filled. “And despite everything, it broke my heart. Even though, yes, I’ve finally accepted that whatever’s going on in Rick’s head has nothing to do with me. But on some level—” another sigh “—it still kills me that I couldn’t figure out how to fix things.”

Yeah. He knew how that went, didn’t he? Knew, too, the folly of that particular mind-set, thinking if one person wants things to work badly enough, it can happen. “And sometimes, the only way to fix something is to walk away.”

Silence shuddered between them for several beats before, on a long breath, she sagged back into the couch. “Yeah. I know.” Her eyes lowered to the dog’s ginormous head, still on her lap. “Except the divorce didn’t end the...problems.”

“The drinking, you mean?”

“That, and the emotional outbursts. If anything, they got worse.” Kelly lifted her eyes again, and the fear Matt saw there knifed him in the gut. “In fact, Rick’s only supposed to be with the kids when his mother’s around. Since he lives with her now.”

“Are you okay with that?”

“Very. I’d trust Lynn with my life. And my kids’. She’s devastated by what’s happened. And as frustrated at not being able to get through to Rick as I was. Am. So this seemed a reasonable compromise. Except, as I said, he keeps coming over. And about a week ago, I noticed this...blankness in his eyes. And that...”

Her lower lip briefly quivered. “I’ve tried talking to Family Services to get a restraining order but they don’t issue those on hunches. On feelings. On things that...” Pressing her lips together, she gave her head a quick shake. “On what might happen. And since he’s never actually harmed the children...”

Something in her voice... Matt’s eyes narrowed. “So what changed things?”

A moment or two passed before she said, “Rick called, long after the kids were asleep, wanting to talk to Coop. I said no and he went ballistic. More than usual, I mean. Then he insinuated...” She swallowed. “He said if he c-couldn’t have the kids whenever he wanted, then neither of us could.”

Matt froze. “And you took that to mean...?”

“Something I can’t even think about. And what really scared me was that he wasn’t drunk. Not that I could tell, anyway.”

For several seconds, Matt stared at her profile as she kept her gaze fixed on the coffee table between them. He would never have figured the Kelly he’d once known for a liar—Sabrina wouldn’t have kept her as a friend if she had been. But he didn’t know this Kelly, did he? “You think he was serious?”

She lifted tear-filled eyes to Matt again. If she was pulling one over on him, she was doing a bang-up job. “I sure wasn’t going to stick around and find out, was I? Court orders be damned.” She sighed. “So. Here we are. Still want to help me?”

Matt sat forward, like that would relieve the agita. In theory he understood the impossibility of mitigating every potential nightmare. No police force in the country had those kinds of resources. Also, in theory, as an officer of the law he was bound to uphold that law. And for God’s sake, not be a party to someone breaking that law.

Except he’d also seen firsthand how often inaction led to unimaginable horror. And even more unimaginable grief. Maybe he couldn’t say for sure she was telling the truth, but his gut told him she was. At least, mostly. Because his gut was also telling him she was holding something back. Something he’d pry out of her later, for sure.

But not tonight.

After a long moment Matt got to his feet and looked past Kelly into the kitchen. “You sure nobody can connect you to this place? Your ex? His mother?”

“Positive.”

“But they can contact you?”

“They have my cell number, yes. And no, it can’t be traced. I checked.”

He almost smiled. “I couldn’t—and won’t—even try to advise you on what to do. In fact—” he finally met her gaze “—this conversation? Never happened. Got it?”

A frown momentarily dug into her brow, then eased. “Yes.”

“Then you can stay here, at least for the moment. Until you—we—figure something out. I’m sure Dad would agree. And in any case, he won’t be back for a week. By that time... Well. Anything can happen, right?”

Kelly stood and shoved her hair away from her face. “And Abby?”

He’d forgotten about his sister. Crap.

“Tell her whatever you think seems best. People come through here all the time. She probably won’t think anything one way or the other.”

“But you’re still putting your butt on the line.”

“True. But so are you.”

“Why?” she said softly, and he knew what she was asking.

“Frankly? I have no idea.”

Kelly blinked a couple times, then crossed the floor to put her hands on his shoulders, standing on tiptoe to kiss his cheek. “Thank you,” she whispered, then padded out of the room, leaving Matt pretty sure he wasn’t going to sleep worth crap tonight.

Chapter Two

When Kelly’s phone buzzed at some ungodly hour the next morning, she checked the display, then stiffened. However, tempting as it was to let the call go through to voice mail, she knew Rick would only keep calling until she answered. More than once, she’d considered getting a new number. But even as messed up as things had been, she still hadn’t been able to completely cut him off. Not that she could have, anyway, with the kids.

After last night, however...

Still dressed, she unwrapped herself from the heavy Pendleton blanket that had been folded at the foot of Sabrina’s bed and crunched forward, forking her fingers through her tangled curls before answering.

“Where the hell are you?” Rick said.

Meaning he’d been by the apartment. Squeezing her eyes shut, Kelly hugged the brightly patterned blanket to her cramping chest, reminding herself of how far she’d come, that she was brave and strong and no longer vulnerable to Rick’s guilt trips. To his threats, veiled or otherwise. That she was nobody’s victim, dammit. “You don’t need to know that right now.”

“The hell you say. And that’s not answering the question.”

Anger propelled her off the bed, even if she did cling to the bedpost for support as she shoved her still-socked feet into her sneakers. “Yes, it is—”

“It’s not right, Kelly,” Rick whined in her ear, “not knowing where my kids are. Why are you punishing me like this?”

Dear God—was he serious? She sank onto the edge of the rumpled bed, her free arm strangling her trembling stomach. Had she dreamed last night? Or misinterpreted things that badly?

Then she remembered his voice, low and cold, uttering words she would have never dreamed she’d ever hear come out of his mouth, even at his worst, and her strength returned. “This isn’t about punishing you, it’s about protecting our children—”

“That’s bull—”

“You threatened them, Rick!” she whispered, praying the kids were still asleep. “Said if you couldn’t have them, then neither of us could.”

“What? Where the hell are you getting this?”

“From you. Word for word.”

A beat or two passed before he said, “Even if I did say that, you’ve got it all balled up, I couldn’t have possibly meant—”

“I know what I heard, Rick. And how you said it. You telling me you don’t remember—?”

“I don’t, swear to God. Whether you believe me or not.”

Kelly sighed so hard it was almost painful. “Well, you did. Whether you believe me or not. Look, I know we’ve had this conversation a hundred times already, but I’m going to say it again—you need help. And if what went down last night doesn’t bring that home for you, I don’t know what will. And until you get that help—” she fisted her free hand “—I’m not letting you anywhere near the kids. End of discussion, I’m done.”

Shaking slightly, she disconnected the call as Matt appeared at the open bedroom door, startling her, his arms crossed as if nothing short of a tornado would budge him. While she probably looked like a headlight-blinded possum a split second before splat.

Wondering how much he’d heard—and deciding she didn’t care—Kelly splayed her fingers through her hair again, then let her hand drop.

“Kind of hard to have a meltdown with you gawking at me like that.”

“You think I’ve never seen a meltdown before?”

“Not from me you haven’t. And trust me, it’s not pretty.”

“Somehow, I doubt you can top Sabrina in that department—”

“Matt! For heaven’s sake—don’t you have someplace, anyplace, to be?”

He shoved his fingers into his jeans’ pockets, revealing a dark green corduroy shirt underneath a beat-up leather jacket. Black, of course. To go with the beard stubble, even more pronounced than it’d been last night. “Yeah, actually,” he said on a rush of air, “I’m expecting a delivery at the house, then I’m headed into the city. But it can wait—”

“No. Really. We’ll be fine.” Kelly tried to smile, failed, went with a frustrated growl instead. “Dammit—I thought I’d feel relieved once we got away. Instead I feel... I don’t know. Like...like maybe I overreacted.”

Matt’s expression darkened. “And what was the alternative? Stick around until something bad did happen? Like you said yourself, sometimes you gotta listen to that voice.”

“Then why can’t I trust that? If it’s so right, why am I second-guessing myself?” Her hand shot up. “Never mind, don’t answer that. Not that you could. And, anyway, you don’t need to get sucked into this any more than you already are. But thanks. For letting us stay here.”

“No problem,” Matt said, then extended his hand. “Give me your phone.”

She pressed it to her chest. “Why?”

“So I can plug in my number, why do you think? And I want yours, too.” When she hesitated, he pushed out a breath. “I’m not gonna stalk you, for God’s sake. Just give me the damn phone.” So she did, and watched with the strangest mixture of relief and worry as he deftly added his number to her contacts. “You need anything, you call, you hear me? And before you give me any this-is-my-problem-not-yours crap... I get that, okay? Doesn’t mean you have to deal with it alone.” He handed back her phone, then dug his out of his jacket pocket. Waited.

She sighed, told him then frowned. “Why are you being so nice to me? I mean, for all intents and purposes we’re strangers—”

“Like hell.” Matt slipped his phone back into his pocket, then slammed his hands into his jacket pockets. “I mean, yeah, on the surface, you have a point. But we saw each other nearly every day for years. That hardly makes us strangers. In fact, I’m guessing both Sabrina and my dad would say you were family. Not to mention my mom, if she were still here. And they’d all three wring my neck if they thought I’d left you to swing in the breeze. So deal with it.”

She almost smiled. “Is there another option?”

“No.” He started to leave, turned back. “Abby should be up soon, the dog’s already been out and everything’s fair game in the kitchen. I’ll be back by two, but if you need anything—”

“Yeah, yeah, got it. Thanks.”

He gave her a long, disquieting look, then huffed out a breath. “Just so you know? I’m not entirely unconflicted about this. Like you said, I’ve only got your side of the story. That said, I’ve worked my fair share of domestic abuse cases, saw more times than I can count women who didn’t follow their instincts, who either didn’t see or didn’t want to see the warning signs. Or were too scared to act on them. So if what you’re saying is true...then what you’re doing? Takes balls.”

With that, he finally left. Only somehow his presence remained, all that ubermacho protective energy vibrating around her. Through her. And she thought, This is bad.

Because what she had brewing here was a perfect storm of overwrought, celibate woman colliding with honorable hunk...to whom, alas, Kelly wasn’t less attracted than she had been in days of yore.

So, yeah. Hell.

By rights, she should have felt more safe, more secure, that Matt took his protective role so seriously, his justified ambivalence notwithstanding. He’d keep her babies safe, and that was all that mattered. And God knew it would be so easy to simply...let go, let someone else do the thinking, the planning, the worrying.

Except leaning on men—her father, then Rick... She’d done that her entire life. Until that support got ripped away and she’d nearly drowned in her own insecurities.

A ragged breath left Kelly’s mouth as she squatted to dig clean clothes out of the jumbled mess inside her suitcase. She wasn’t stupid. And heaven knew if pride had been an issue she wouldn’t even be here. But there was a fine line between knowing when to ask for help and expecting other people to fix your problems for you. Having barely figured out the difference, for damn sure she wasn’t about to slip back into old habits. Not just for her sake, but especially for her children’s.

Meaning as much as the old Kelly ached to let Matt be Matt, the new one didn’t dare.

* * *

Showered and dressed in at least a clean variation of what she’d worn the day before, Kelly checked on her still-sleeping children before following the heady aroma of brewing coffee to the kitchen. By now the sun had hauled its butt up over the horizon, blasting the space with light and making the countertops glisten more than the patchy snow outside. Matt, bless his heart, had made enough coffee for half the town, and Kelly gratefully filled the huge mug sitting by the maker.

She took that first, glorious sip and sighed. Amazing, what a shower, sunshine and a shot of caffeine could do to brighten one’s mood. Or at least make one feel...hopeful. What tomorrow—shoot, the next hour—would bring, she had no idea. But right now things were better than they had been last night. And that she could work with.

The Newfie clicked over to the French doors, parked her big old nose against one of the panes and rolled back one eye. “No,” Kelly said, and, with a heavy sigh, the dog lumbered off to plop down in a pool of sunlight. Wow. If only the kids were that easy to wrangle.

Inside her jeans’ pocket, her phone vibrated in tandem with her mother-in-law’s ringtone, and the hopefulness wavered.

“Hi, Lynn,” she said softly, searching for something, anything, the kids would eat, since her cooking skills were totally lost on them.

“You really took the kids away?”

Lucky Charms! Yes! “I really did.”

“Far?”

“Far enough. Doubt Rick and I will run into each other in the supermarket.” An unlikely possibility, in any case, since Rick hadn’t seen the inside of a grocery store in decades. She unearthed a pair of plastic bowls from the cupboard, set them on the counter.

“Why now?”

Kelly leaned against the counter, her heart hammering as she squinted into the sun pouring into the formal dining room through two sets of French doors. Since the last thing Kelly wanted to do was add to Lynn’s pain, she’d refused to gripe to the woman about her son, either before or after the divorce. Now was no different. One day, maybe, she’d tell her...everything. But not this morning. So a little fudging was in order. “Because, for one thing, he keeps showing up drunk—”

“Showing up where? To your place?”

“Yes.”

“When the kids are there?”

“That would be his point, unfortunately. And when he’s drunk he’s...not a nice person And last night he called—really late—and he got pretty...belligerent. And I just felt we needed to get away. At least for a while.”

“Without telling Rick where you went?”

“Yes.”

A moment’s pause preceded Lynn’s quiet comment. “So what you’re saying is he’s getting worse.”

The despair in the older woman’s voice seared Kelly’s insides. “I’m so sorry, Lynn, I know this must feel like I’m punishing you, too—”

“And why should you be sorry? This isn’t your fault.”

Kelly swallowed, trying to ease the thickness in her throat. “I was afraid you wouldn’t believe me.”

“For God’s sake, sweetheart... I do have two eyes in my head. Okay, maybe I had a hard time at first, accepting the truth—what mother wants to believe her own son could turn into...” Kelly heard Lynn take a shaky breath, and tears welled in her own eyes. “Into s-somebody she doesn’t even recognize anymore. But I saw how hard you fought to keep your marriage together. And frankly, if it’d been me in the same situation? I don’t know if I could’ve held out as long as you did.”

Her former mother-in-law’s kindness nearly did her in. And only further muddled the whole sordid mess.

“Thank you,” Kelly whispered, and Lynn made a sound that was half laugh, half sigh.

“For what?”

“Being...you.”

That got a snort. “Like I’m going to be somebody else? So maybe this’ll be the kick in the pants Ricky needs. Maybe one day—soon, God willing—he’ll pull his head out of his butt and see what he’s doing, get back on track. And who knows? Maybe the two of you could work things out—”

“Lynn. Please...don’t.”

Another sigh. “I know. It’s just... I want you to be happy, sweetheart. For all of us to be happy again. Like we used to be. That’s not such a bad thing, is it?”

Finally, Kelly picked up the box of cereal, started to pour it into the bowls. “Not a bad thing at all. And I won’t keep the kids from you, I promise—”

“Hey. That’s mine.”

At the young woman’s Jersey-tough voice, Kelly dropped the box, sending little marshmallow and sugary oat bits skittering across the kitchen floor and the dog into a feeding frenzy. Wresting the box from underneath the Newfie’s elephant-size paw, she heard Lynn say, “Okay, I gotta get going. But you call me anytime, okay? I love you, baby—”

The person attached to the voice clomped across the floor, snatched the box off the counter. Glowered at Kelly. Who pointed to her phone, then said into it, “I love you, too, Lynn.”

“I know, honey. I know.”

Her chest aching, Kelly disconnected the call and slipped her phone into her pocket, then faced the wiry little blonde in jeans, hoodie and a scraped-back ponytail who probably didn’t weigh as much as Coop. Without makeup, she looked about twelve. And yet, as Kelly watched Abby dump cereal into a bowl and clomp back toward the island—in a pair of the ugliest work boots on God’s green earth—she decided in a barroom brawl, her money was on the pipsqueak.

“Abby?” she said, even though Kelly would have known her anywhere, she looked exactly like her mother. If leaner and meaner.

“That’s me, yep.” The bowl set, Matt’s sister veered back toward the coffeemaker, only to glare at the mug in Kelly’s hand. Oops.

“Matt told me to help myself to anything, I didn’t realize the cereal was yours—”

“And the mug.”

“O-kay! Here, I’ll find something else—”

“Fuggedaboutit.” Twisting her ponytail in her hand, Abby slammed open a cupboard door, grabbed another mug. Banged the door shut hard enough to make things rattle. Opened the fridge, grabbed milk, slammed that door, too.

“Um... I take it you’re not a morning person—?”

One hand shot up, cutting her off. The other poured her coffee, lifted the mug to her mouth. Two, three sips later, Abby let her head loll back, her eyes drift shut. She opened them again, took another swallow then sighed.

“Sorry. I’m a bear before my coffee.”

“I can relate. I’m Kelly, by the way.”

“Yeah. Matt texted me, told me you and your kids were here.” She made a face. “That I should be nice.” Abby turned, smushing her skinny little butt against the edge of the counter. “Like that’s even an issue, I’m always nice.”

Kelly smiled. “So you don’t remember me?” At the young woman’s head shake, Kelly said, “Your sister and I were best friends. I remember when you were born. In fact, I used to change your stinky diapers.”