Modern Romance May 2020 Books 5-8

Sophy avoided his eye. ‘Something like that, I think.’

Apollo cursed. And then he said, ‘The truth is that she wasn’t that far off the mark. As soon as I saw you again I wanted you.’

Sophy’s face got hot again. She risked a glance at Apollo, who looked grim. He might be admitting he hadn’t stopped wanting her but it didn’t feel like a compliment. More an accusation.

‘And if this crazy plan of hers had worked and you’d managed to seduce me and get pregnant, then what?’

Sophy felt sick. ‘I don’t know. I don’t think she’d thought it through... I certainly had no idea what she’d planned. It sounded like gibberish to me.’

Apollo hated to admit that if Sophy had returned to the villa in Athens in the place of Sasha, and he’d wanted her as much as he wanted her now, she could very well have seduced him.

It was a bitter pill to swallow. He wanted her now. He was acutely aware of the buttons on the shirt-dress—how easily they would come undone, baring her to his eyes and touch.

No make-up. No adornment but her exceptional natural beauty. How could she have ever thought she was less attractive than her sister? The minute Sasha had turned up in his office in London he’d had an adverse reaction to her. Much to his relief.

At first you were disappointed.

He ignored that unwelcome reminder.

Sophy looked at him and he noticed the shadows under her eyes. He felt wrung out. He could only imagine how she felt.

‘What happens now? I expect you want me to leave as soon as possible.’

Apollo couldn’t stem the visceral rejection he had to that suggestion. He told himself it was incredulity that she could think she could walk away so easily, not the pulsing ever-present desire in his blood.

He shook his head. ‘I’m afraid that’s not possible.’

Sophy hated the little jump in her pulse when he said that. He must despise her after everything. She wasn’t even sure if he believed her. ‘Why?’

‘For one thing, we have a situation on our hands. Obviously we won’t need to divorce now. But I’ve been seen out in public with a woman who is not my wife. A wife who has been deceased for some weeks.’

‘We’ll have to announce the accident and her death and the press attention will be intense. You’ll be hounded when they find out she had a twin sister and that you were also in the car, but we can try to delay that until her death has been announced and the press moves on to the next story.’

Sophy frowned. ‘How can you do that?’

‘By taking you back to the island for a couple of weeks when the news is announced tomorrow. It’ll keep you insulated from the press and it’ll take about that long to process the repatriation of your sister’s body. By then, the press should have moved on. Also, it’ll give the authorities time to return your personal items.’

CHAPTER NINE

AND THEN WHAT? That was the question that had been reverberating around Sophy’s head for the past twenty-four hours since they’d landed back on Krisakis. Olympia had shown her back into her bedroom, separate from Apollo’s. Sophy chastised herself. What had she expected? For them to blithely continue where they’d left off before her memory had returned?

Yes.

Her conscience stung. How could she be so selfish when her sister was dead?

Because it was your sister who was selfish in the first place, betraying your trust, going behind your back to try and seduce Apollo to further her own ends. Lying to trap him.

Sophy sighed deeply and hugged her knees tighter to her body. Yes, she could blame Sasha for so much, but also it had been her who had set this chain of events in motion by not revealing her true self because it had been easier to hide behind her sister, rather than believe that someone like Apollo could possibly be interested in her.

The waves lapped up gently onto the shore near her feet. It was soothing. It was also very quiet here on the beach in the late afternoon. The heat was less intense now.

Since they’d arrived on the island, Apollo had been busy, either in his study in the villa or when he went to visit the construction site. They hadn’t talked about anything since that last conversation.

Sophy knew she should be feeling some sort of cathartic weight lift off her shoulders, with her memory returned and full knowledge of what had happened, no matter how painful it was to face.

But she felt more tangled up than ever. Aware that her feelings for Apollo ran far deeper than she liked to admit. And she hated the sense that she was now a burden for him to deal with until the press attention died down.

Because surely he was just waiting for the earliest opportunity to let her go? Get on with his life? Say good riddance to her, and Sasha.

He couldn’t want her any more. Surely his desire was well and truly eclipsed by disgust for what her sister, and she, however unwittingly, had done to him?

Sophy shut down her circling thoughts. Torturing herself like this was getting her nowhere. Apollo was keeping her here to protect himself as much as her from the adverse press attention.

The water was lapping at her feet now, refreshingly cool. She was about to move back but she was too slow as another wave on the incoming tide rushed in faster, soaking her bottom. She jumped up with a little squeal.

She was about to step back out of the way but another wave broke over her bare feet. Suddenly she was filled with a sense of longing to feel the water on her body. Even though the thought of walking into the sea terrified her. She remembered now why she couldn’t swim and with a kind of sickening predictability it came back to Sasha.

They’d been very little and she and Sasha had been playing in a pool while on holiday. When their parents had been momentarily diverted, Sasha had taken the opportunity to dunk Sophy’s head under the water, holding it there until Sophy had panicked and taken in a lungful of water, nearly drowning.

She’d been too terrified to swim after that, refusing to take lessons. Until Apollo had taken her into the pool that day.

Something defiant rose up inside Sophy. Anger and an impotent sense of rage at her sister—for all that she had done, for all that Sophy had allowed her to do, and for dying, before Sophy had got to tell her that she loved her one more time.

Tears were sliding down Sophy’s cheeks before she could stop them, emotions overflowing. Obeying an urge she couldn’t ignore, she stripped down to her underwear, pulling the sundress she was wearing over her head.

She wanted to feel a wave breaking over her head, as much to prove to herself that she wasn’t scared as to cleanse something inside herself. Something she couldn’t even really articulate.

At the last moment she looked around. The beach was entirely empty and private. Not another soul.

She could almost hear her sister’s voice in her head. ‘Go on, Soph, don’t be such a scaredy-cat.’ It spurred her on.

She stripped off her knickers and bra and threw all her clothes to a safe distance from the incoming tide and took a step into the water.

It felt glorious—the cool water on her sun-warmed skin. She took another step and the waves crashed around her knees. Another step. She gasped as the water reached her hips and lower belly.

Another wave was approaching, bigger, and taking a deep breath, heart pounding, she ducked down, letting it break over her head. Instantly she sprang back up, sucking in deep breaths, skin tingling all over from the cold and exhilaration, and the decadence of being naked in the water.

Another wave was coming, and she ducked down for that one too, spluttering a little as she came back up, but suddenly she realised she was in deeper water that came almost up to her breasts and another wave was coming, breaking over her head. When she emerged again there was another wave almost immediately and suddenly she couldn’t get her breath.

Before panic could set in, a strong pair of hands was under her arms, lifting her out of the oncoming wave. She blinked and spluttered, hands going out and landing on a wall of muscle.

‘What do you think you’re doing, you little fool? You don’t know how to swim, you’re not ready for the sea yet. You could drown out here.’

Apollo.

Waves were breaking around them now. Apollo’s hair was slicked back from the sea. His face stark. He looked down and she saw his cheeks flush. ‘You’re naked.’

Sophy was gasping. ‘I...didn’t bring a swimsuit... I wasn’t going to get into the water...but I just...wanted to feel it against my skin.’

Her teeth started chattering, as much in reaction to Apollo as because the water was cold.

Apollo was grim. ‘There’s a storm coming, this tide is coming in fast.’

He swung her effortlessly into his arms and carried her out of the water. It was only then she realised how far in she’d wandered. Her arms were around Apollo’s neck, her bare breasts pressing against his chest.

She burned with mortification but also something stronger.

When they reached the shallows she said, ‘You can put me down, I’m okay now.’

He ignored her, long legs striding back up the beach. She could see a towel on the ground, near her discarded clothes. Apollo put her down and picked up the towel, wrapping it around her shoulders. He caught the ends and pulled her towards him.

She was very aware that he was naked too, apart from swimming shorts that hugged his body, leaving little to the imagination.

‘What were you thinking? You could have drowned.’

Sophy blinked up at him. ‘I wasn’t thinking... I didn’t expect it to get rough so quickly.’

She didn’t even realise she was still trembling until Apollo cursed and started rubbing her skin with the towel. She wanted to say she wasn’t cold—it was his effect on her. His eyes dropped and his hands stopped moving. She didn’t have to follow his gaze to feel its effect on her breasts, nipples tight and sensitive after brushing against his chest.

She wanted him with a desperation she’d never experienced before. That recklessness that had sent her into the water rose up again and for a heady moment Sophy wondered if this was the real essence of herself that she’d repressed for so long, while she’d hidden in Sasha’s shadow?

She dislodged his hands and the towel fell off her shoulders. There was something very elemental about being naked in front of him like this. Apollo’s eyes flared bright green. His jaw clenched. ‘What are you doing?’

Sophy also realised in that moment that she desperately needed Apollo to make love to her. To Sophy. To know who he was making love to this time. To call out her name. Exorcise Sasha from their past.

She opened her mouth but then she went cold inside. She’d just imagined seeing his reaction to her. He didn’t want her any more. How could he after everything that had transpired? All her bravado leached away and she crossed her arms over her chest, looked for the towel. ‘I’m sorry... I know you can’t still want—’ She spied the towel and bent down to retrieve it but when she straightened up Apollo took it out of her hands and pulled them apart, baring her to his gaze again.

‘I can’t still want what?’

‘Me.’

‘Theos. If only I didn’t want you, my life would be infinitely simpler.’

He tugged her towards him and she stumbled slightly, landing against him, a sense of relief rising inside her. He took his hands off hers and cupped her face, tilting it up to his. Then he bent his head and covered her mouth with his in a kiss that was so explicit and carnal that Sophy lost all sense of time and place.

When he pulled back she felt dizzy, plastered against his body. She could feel the bulge of his arousal through the thin material of his shorts and put her hand down there, exploring tentatively.

He put his hand on hers. His voice was rough. ‘Stop, unless you want to make love right here, right now.’

She must have communicated her desperation silently because Apollo muttered something unintelligible and let her go briefly to pull down his own shorts and spread the towel on the sand.

He pulled her down alongside him on the towel, shielding her from the rough sand with his body. His hands stroked along every curve of her body, sending her into a frenzy of need. Big hands cupped her buttocks, squeezing, kneading. Her hands moved over the wide muscled plane of his chest, mouth seeking and finding the blunt nub of his nipple, hearing his sucked-in breath when she explored with her tongue and teeth.

He put a hand in her hair, tugging her head back gently. Her vision was blurry.

‘Sophy... I want you, now.’

Hearing her name on his lips made her feel absurdly emotional. She ducked her head into his neck. ‘I want you too...’

He moved her over his body so that her legs were astride his hips. The centre of her body was embarrassingly hot and damp, but before she could dwell on that her entire being suffused with pleasure when she felt the head of Apollo’s erection nudge against where she was so hot and needy.

He looked at her. ‘Okay?’

She nodded. He notched the head inside her and she sucked in a breath. He put his hands on her hips. His expression was strained. ‘Move up, and back.’

She bit her lip, every part of her being focused on doing as he asked. She came up and felt him under her, power barely leashed...and sank down, taking him inside her. It was the most exquisite agony she’d ever experienced as she felt herself stretch to accommodate his hard length.

She moved experimentally, up and down. Apollo’s hands were on her hips, but not controlling her movements, letting her take the lead. It was heady.

A rhythm slowly built and built until Sophy couldn’t control it any more. Apollo held her hips then, showing her how much restraint he’d exercised as he pumped powerfully up and into her body. She couldn’t stay upright as she convulsed with pleasure, curving over him as he followed her over the edge and into an ocean of total and utter sated bliss.

As the after-shocks pulsed through their entwined limbs, neither one of them was aware of the incoming water lapping around their heated bodies.

Apollo hadn’t intended to make love to Sophy. He’d intended to bring her to the island and put some distance between them. Giving himself time to assimilate everything. Absorb the reality that she was who she was. A different person. The same person.

And for about twenty-four hours it had worked out that way. He’d kept his distance—gone to the site, stayed in his study.

But then, this afternoon, he’d seen her far below on the beach. He’d seen her taking her clothes off, her pale body gleaming like a pearl against the azure sky and ocean, like some ethereal being. Not human.

Then she’d looked around, taken her underwear off. Stepped gingerly into the water. Then she’d waded further in, ducking under the waves. Apollo had felt like he was intruding on a very private moment and then he’d realised she was in danger of getting out of her depth. And that she couldn’t swim.

When he’d reached her his insides had been in a knot and he’d hauled her up out of the water, her slim body far too light and puny against the might of the sea. He’d been angry.

Scared.

He’d also noticed that her eyes were red and he didn’t think it was from the water. She’d been crying. Mourning.

He hadn’t intended making love to her there and then. But she’d blasted through any resolve to resist her just by looking at him. Never mind being naked, her skin wet from the sea. Red hair in long silken skeins over her shoulders. Like a water nymph sent to tempt him. Or a mermaid.

The more he had of her the more he wanted. It made his skin prickle with a sense of panic. Exposure. The same kind of exposure he’d felt when he’d realised she had been a virgin, because he’d wanted her too much to look for the signs of innocence, and in hindsight they’d been there. He’d just ignored them.

Today had just proved her effect on him.

Dangerous.

He said, ‘We didn’t use protection today.’

Sophy’s hand tightened on the stem of the wine glass. Heat suffused her body again to think of how carnal she’d been on the beach earlier. She barely remembered Apollo putting the dress over her head afterwards, dressing her. Leading her up the steps. Putting her to bed. She’d woken in her room, alone, as the sun had been setting outside.

She’d taken a shower and come out to find Apollo sitting in the dining area, clean-shaven, hair damp, as Olympia had laid the table for dinner. For a moment she’d almost been afraid she’d dreamt up the beach, but the storm he’d mentioned was lashing at the windows now.

They hadn’t used protection. Because she’d all but begged him to make love to her.

She fought the rising tide of heat under her skin. Apollo looked at her and shook his head. ‘It’s amazing that you can still blush...’

That only made her blush even harder. ‘It’s okay... I’m at a safe place in my cycle.’

Apollo saw the worried look on Sophy’s face. She couldn’t hide her expressions. He had to acknowledge uncomfortably that he trusted her word.

‘It won’t happen again.’

Her face was still pink. Her hair was down around her shoulders. She’d appeared for dinner in long loose trousers and a loose silk top. It kept slipping off one shoulder.

The pink leached a little from her cheeks. She said, ‘I think you’re right, it’s not a good idea.’

Apollo dragged his gaze up from where her pale shoulder was bared. He frowned. ‘What are you talking about?’

‘Making lo—’ She stopped. ‘Sex. It’s probably not a good idea. Considering everything...’

A visceral rejection of what she’d said rose up from somewhere deep and primal inside Apollo. He might have come here intending to keep his distance but after this afternoon that was an impossibility.

He shook his head and reached out a hand, finding Sophy’s across the table and tugging her up out of her chair and over to him. He pulled her down and she landed on his lap, sliding into place like a missing jigsaw piece.

It’s just desire, repeated Apollo like a mantra in his head.

He said, ‘That’s not what I meant.’

Sophy hated the way her heart leapt. ‘What did you mean?’

‘I meant that I won’t be careless again, but we will be making love again. I don’t see why we can’t make the most of this. The chemistry between us is more powerful than anything I’ve ever experienced. It’s unprecedented for me. But it will burn out. It always does.’

It will burn out. Sophy felt something inside her rebel at that assertion. This feeling that she’d never get enough of him...she couldn’t imagine it ever fading away.

As if he could read her mind, he said carefully, ‘Sophy, nothing has changed. I am not in the market for a relationship or family. It’s not something I ever want to experience. If anything, believing that I might become a father has only confirmed my vow not to have a family. I had a family and I lost them, I won’t put myself through that again.’

Sophy’s heart constricted. His words, painful as they were, actually helped to clarify how differently her very similar experience had shaped her. ‘I lost my family too...but I know I won’t feel whole again until I have a family of my own.’

Apollo tensed under her body and she held her breath. But then he said in a voice devoid of emotion, ‘And I’m sure you’ll have that one day. With someone else. What I’m offering is very transient. A couple of weeks to explore this insane chemistry before we part ways and get on with our separate lives. Once and for all.’

Sophy knew that she should stand up and step away. Tell Apollo that she wasn’t interested in a transient affair. She wanted more. She’d always wanted more. It was why she’d still been a virgin long after her sister had lost her innocence.

But Apollo wanted her for now. Maybe that was enough. Maybe she would wake up one morning and not feel this insatiable need. Maybe she would be able to move on. Could she stand up and step back...from this? This energy pulsing between them even now?

She knew the answer. No way. Memories might be cold bedfellows in the future but she knew she didn’t have the strength to walk away. Not yet. He’d been her only constant for the last few turbulent weeks. She needed to feel anchored again. Rooted. Even if it was only temporary.

She slid her arms around his neck. ‘Okay, then.’

Apollo smiled and it was a smile of pure male satisfaction as he drew her head down to his and took her mouth in a searing kiss. A promise of what was to come, what he was offering, and she, like a miser, would take it.