His Best Friend's Baby

“When I told him that I was tired of having to patch up people that another human had destroyed, he encouraged me to do something different. Even suggested I move to Australia for a new start. He joked that if he ever left the army he’d use his skills to become a police officer.”

Phoebe had never heard Joshua say anything about wanting to do that. He had told Ryan things he either hadn’t wanted to share with her or couldn’t. It made her sad and angry at the same time. She and Joshua had just not been as close as a married couple should have been.

“After that kind of night you know each other pretty well. We started getting together for drinks whenever we had leave at the same time.” His eyes didn’t meet hers. “JT found out that I didn’t get much mail so he shared his letters with me.”

For seconds Phoebe panicked, trying to remember what she had said in her letters. Misery overtook the panic. During the last few years of their marriage her letters had been less about them personally and more about what was happening with her students, how Melbourne was changing, what she was doing at the house. It had been as if she’d been writing to a friend instead of her husband.

“I always looked forward to your letters. They were full of news and I liked to hear about your class. The letters your students wrote were the best. There was something about them that helped make all the ugliness disappear for a while.”

“I’m glad they helped. My students liked writing them. Thank you for telling me about Joshua. I guess I just wanted to talk about him. This is his baby and he isn’t around. Just hearing about him makes him seem a little closer. But it’s time for me to go.” She needed to think about what Ryan had told her. The fact that someone had known her husband better than she had made her feel heartsick.

Ryan stood and Phoebe did also. She led the way to the door. Outside Ryan turned in the direction of the hospital.

“I need to go this way to catch the tram. Thanks for dinner.” She turned toward the left.

“I’ll give you a ride home,” Ryan said.

“I don’t want you to drive all the way out to my house.”

“I don’t mind and you don’t need to be so late getting home. Don’t you own a car?”

“No, I can take the tram to almost anything I need.”

“But you’re making two-hour round trips to see Sophia. In America we can’t live without a car. There isn’t public transportation everywhere.”

“Yes, but that’s only once a month and it’s worth it to have Sophia as my midwife. I wish she was going to be there for the delivery.”

“I realize that I live in Australia, but I can’t get used to prenatal care being called antenatal. It took me forever to tell the mothers I saw that they needed to come to the antenatal clinic. I just think prenatal.”

“The ideas and ways we grow up with are hard to change.”

“Yes, once an idea gets fixed in my head it’s hard to make me budge. And with that thought, not to make you feel bad, but you look like you could use some rest. I’m driving you home.”

“I am tired and I know now that you won’t change your mind. I’m going to accept the ride.”

“Good.”

Ryan escorted Phoebe back to the hospital and to his car. The sidewalk wasn’t near as busy as it had been earlier. It had been a long time since he’d done something as simple as stroll through a park with a woman. He couldn’t remember ever doing so with one who was expecting. People smiled and greeted Phoebe. She returned them. A number of times they turned to him and offered their congratulations. The first time he began to explain but soon realized it was a waste of time. Instead, he nodded noncommittally.

“I’m sorry,” Phoebe said after the first incident.

“Not your fault. You can’t help what they think.”

He had hardly pulled out of the parking area before Phoebe had closed her eyes. She was tired.

Ryan got a number of reactions when he told someone he was a midwife. He’d gotten used to it. But the one thing he couldn’t get used to was not being able to understand all the nuances of the female body when a baby was growing inside it. The sudden ability to go to sleep anywhere and in any position was one of those. It must be like being in the army. He had learned to sleep anywhere at any time.

Phoebe blinked with the small jolt of the car stopping. She’d fallen asleep again. It was getting embarrassing.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to go to sleep.”

“Not a problem. You’re not the first woman I’ve put to sleep.”

Phoebe gave him a questioning look. She bet she wasn’t. What had her thinking of Ryan in that suggestive way?

“I’m the one sorry this time. I didn’t mean it like that.”

“Like what?” She gave him her best innocent look.

“You know, like …”

Phoebe enjoyed his flustered expression and the pinkness that began to work its way up his neck.

She rested her hands on each side of her belly. “I’m well aware of the facts of life and how a man can satisfy a woman.”

He grinned. “You’re laughing at me now.”

Phoebe chuckled. “I guess I am.” She opened her car door. “Thanks for the burger and the ride. Also thanks for telling me about Joshua. You have no idea how much it means to me.”

“Hey, wait a minute.”

Before she could get completely out of the car Ryan had come round and was standing on the path, reaching to help her. His hand went to her elbow and he supported her as she stood. He pushed the door closed behind her and it made a thud.

“Listen, if there’s anything that I can do for you …”

He sounded sincere. “I appreciate it … Uh, there is one thing I could use some help with.”

“What’s that?”

His voice held an eager tone as if he was looking for a chance to atone for his earlier behavior. She hated to ask him but couldn’t think of another way to get it done before the baby came. “I had a bed for the baby delivered but it needs to be put together. I would pay you.”

Ryan looked as if she had slapped him. “You will not. How about I come by Saturday afternoon? If I have to work I’ll call and let you know, otherwise I’ll be here on Saturday.”

“Thank you, that would be wonderful.” And she meant it. She’d spent more than one night worrying over how she was going to get that baby bed assembled.

“Not a problem. Do you have tools or do I need to bring mine?”

“You might want to bring yours. I have a few but only necessities like a hammer and screwdriver.”

“Then it’s a plan. Why don’t you give me your number?” Ryan took out his cellphone and punched in the numbers she told him.

“I’ll be here after lunch on Saturday, unless you hear differently from me.”

“Thank you.”

“No worries. Furniture I can do.”

Something about Ryan made her believe that he had many talents if he was just willing to show them.

“Come on. I’ll walk you to your door.”

Phoebe didn’t argue this time.

“See you Saturday.” With that he turned and left her to enter her home.

She was putting her key in the lock when she noticed the curtain of her neighbor’s house flutter. Mrs. Rosenheim had been watching. She would no doubt be over the next afternoon to get all the particulars about who Ryan was and how Phoebe knew him.

Ryan was as good as his word. He was there on Saturday just after lunchtime with a tool bag in his hand. Mrs. Rosenheim was sitting at Phoebe’s kitchen table when the knock came at the door.

“I won’t stay but I am going to check this boy out before I go.”

Phoebe would have argued but it wouldn’t have done her any good. Despite the fact that Mrs. Rosenheim was probably older than Phoebe’s grandmother would be, she was a commanding presence and was only concerned for Phoebe’s welfare. They had started taking care of each other two years ago when Phoebe had moved in.

Joshua had only been home once since she’d been living there. He’d not been impressed with Mrs. Rosenheim, calling her the “old busybody bird.” Phoebe had learned to appreciate her concern. If nothing else, she knew someone would miss her if she didn’t come home.

She opened the door for Ryan. “Come in.”

“How’re you doing?”

The question sounded like he was making pleasant conversation, but he was also looking at her with a trained eye. He smelled of sawdust with a hint of citrus. It made her want to step closer. Take a deeper breath.

“I’m feeling fine.” She smiled and he nodded.

“Good. I told Sophia that I would check.”

Mrs. Rosenheim shuffled into the room.

Ryan looked from her to Phoebe. “Ryan, this is my neighbor, Mrs. Rosenheim.”

He sat his tool bag on the floor at his feet and extended a hand. “Nice to meet you.”

“You’re American.”

“Yes, ma’am. Texan.”

Mrs. Rosenheim made a noncommittal sound low in her throat. Ryan gave Phoebe a questioning look. She shrugged her shoulders.

“So you knew Mr. Taylor.”

A guarded look came over Ryan’s face. “Yes, JT and I served in Iraq together.”

“Bad thing, leaving Phoebe here all by herself all the time. A man should want to be at home with his wife. She needs someone to watch over her. Help her.”

Phoebe didn’t miss the color wash out of Ryan’s face.

“It was his job. The army,” Phoebe said quietly.

“I know, sweetie. But a woman not only wants a man to help put a roof over her head but to be around when the times are hard.” She directed the last few words at Ryan.

“Uh, Mrs. Rosenheim, I think we need to let Ryan get started on the bed. I’m sure he has other places he needs to go today.” Phoebe shook her head at him when she started to say something.

“I’m next door if you need me.” Mrs. Rosenheim made her way out with a last glance at Ryan.

“Formidable lady,” Ryan said with a grin.

“Yes. She and Joshua didn’t like each other on sight, but she’s been good to me. She was with the men who came from the military department to tell me about Joshua. I don’t know what I would have done without her shoulder to cry on. She’s also the one who realized I was pregnant when I started being sick.”

Phoebe suddenly needed to focus on something else. She shook away the memories. Ryan was the first male to have come into her home in over a year. He seemed to take up the entire space. “Anyway, let me show you where the bed is.”

Ryan followed Phoebe down a hallway that had four doors leading off of it. She stopped at the next to last one and nudged the door open.

Against one wall was a large brown box that Ryan guessed was the baby bed. That didn’t surprise him. What did were the piles of books stacked around the room and the desk painted in a folk art style with a chair of the same kind sitting in one corner. The walls were painted a dark gray. Two cans of paint sat in another corner. He fully expected to see a room decorated in all the frills and with toys waiting for a baby. He’d listened to enough mothers talk about what they had done in the baby’s room or were going to do to know that Phoebe was far behind in her preparations.

She placed her hand on the box. “This is the bed.”

“Great. I’ll get it put together.”

Walking to the door, she looked back at him. “You didn’t have to agree to this, but I really appreciate you doing it.”

“Not a problem.”

He’d been working for an hour when Phoebe returned to stand in the doorway. His back was to her but he felt her presence.

“I brought you something to drink.” She moved to the desk and placed the drink on it.

Ryan stood from where he’d been tightening a screw on the back of the bed. He picked up the glass, took a long swallow of water and put it back on the desk again.

Phoebe had an odd look on her face that quickly disappeared.

Ryan said, “I guess I’m doing pretty well. I don’t think I’m going to have but two screws and one thingamajig left over.”

She laughed.

Had he ever heard anything more beautiful? It was almost musical. He vowed then to give her a reason to laugh often.

“My father always said that if you didn’t have parts left over then you didn’t put it together correctly.”

“Where did you grow up?”

“In a small town about fifty miles from here.”

“Is that where you met JT?”

“Yeah. We had a military base nearby. I worked at a local restaurant and Joshua and some of his mates came in for dinner one night and sat at my table.”

“And, as they say, the rest was history.”

“Yes, it was. I was wondering if … uh, you might like to stay for dinner? I do most of my cooking on the weekends so that I don’t have to stand up any more than necessary during the week. How do grilled lamb chops with three vegetables sound?”

When had been the last time he’d eaten a home-cooked meal? Ryan couldn’t remember. He grabbed what he did eat from the hospital cafeteria or from a fast-food place. The thought of sitting down to a real meal was more than he could resist. “That sounds great.”

“Good. Then I’ll go finish up.”

She’d already moved to leave when he said, “Phoebe, I couldn’t help but notice that you don’t have this room set up for a baby.”

Making a slow turn, she faced him. “I don’t need you to make me feel ashamed. I bet you think I sank so far into feeling sorry for myself that I didn’t pay attention to getting ready for the baby. I was still in shock over Joshua when I found out I was pregnant. I just couldn’t bring myself to do anything for a while. Anyway, it has been pushed back. Maybe I’ll have time to do something after the baby comes.”

That wasn’t going to happen. Ryan had also heard the new mothers talking about how they never got anything done any more. “I didn’t mean to make you feel ashamed or defensive. I was thinking I could help. I see you have paint. How about letting me do the walls for you? I could also move this desk and chair to where you want it and the books.”

“I hate to have you do all that.”

“I don’t mind. All you’d have to do is tell me where to put everything.”

She rested her hand on her middle. A wistful look came to her eyes. “It would be nice to have the room ready for the baby. I had planned to buy some stuff for the walls.”

“We could do that together.” It was the least he could do for Joshua. This was practical stuff that needed doing. He had a strong back and could take care of them. He couldn’t fix the fact she was having this baby all by herself but he could help with the everyday aspects of adding a new person to her household.

“That sounds like I’m asking too much.”

“You’re not asking. I volunteered. I’d like to do it. If JT were here, he’d be doing it. This will be my way of helping him out, like he did me.”

Her eyes darkened for a second and then she nodded. “Then thanks. I’ll gladly accept your help, but I’m going to warn you that you may wish you hadn’t.”

“How’s that?”

“I have so many ideas for this room you’ll get tired of me telling you what to do.”

“We’ll see. I’ll be through here in about ten minutes, then I’d like to get started on the painting. Do you have any paint supplies?”

“They’re in the shed in the backyard. When you get done, come to the kitchen and I’ll take you out and show you where they are.”

“Will do.”

He watched her leave. Even with the bulk she carried she had a graceful stride. What had possessed him to get this caught up in doing a baby’s room? He made a practice of not getting involved.

Guilt, pure and simple.

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