His Best Friend's Baby

“Last house on the right. The one with the veranda light on.”

Ryan pulled his car to the curb. He looked at her house. It appeared well cared-for. A rosebush grew abundantly in the front yard. An archway indicated the main door. The only light shining was the one over it.

“Is anyone expecting you?”

“No.”

“You live by yourself?”

“Yes. Did you think I lived with my parents?”

“I just thought since Joshua was gone and you were having a baby, someone would be nearby. Especially as close as you’re obviously getting to the due date.”

“No, there’s no one. My parents were killed in an auto accident the year before I married. My only brother had moved to England two years before that. We were never really close. There is a pretty large age difference between us.” The words were matter-of-fact but she sounded lost.

“Surely someone from Joshua’s family is planning to help out?”

“No.”

“Really? Why not?”

“If you must know, they didn’t want him to marry me. They had someone else picked out. Now that he’s gone, they want nothing more to do with me.”

“That must have been hard to hear.”

“Yeah. It hurt.” Her tone said she still was having a hard time dealing with that knowledge. He couldn’t imagine someone not wanting to have anything to do with their grandchild.

“Not even the baby?”

She placed her hand on her belly. “Not even the baby. They told me it would be too hard to look at him or her and know Joshua wasn’t here.”

“You’ve got to be kidding!” Ryan’s hands tightened on the steering wheel.

“No. That isn’t something that I would kid about.”

“I’m sorry.”

“So am I. But I just think of it as their loss. If that’s the way they feel, then it wouldn’t ever be healthy for the baby to be around them. We’ll be better off without them.”

Ryan looked at the house one more time. By its appearance, the baby would be well cared for and loved. “I’ll see you to the door.”

“That’s not necessary.” She opened the car door.

He climbed out and hurried around the automobile. She’d started to her feet. He held out a hand. After a second she accepted it. His larger one swallowed her smaller one. Hers was soft and smooth, very feminine. So very different from his. A few seconds later she seemed to gather strength. She removed her hand from his and stood taller.

“Come on, I’ll see you to the door.” Even to his own ears it sounded as if he was ready to get rid of her.

“I’ll be fine. You’ve already helped enough by driving me home.” She started up the walk lined with flowers and stopped, then looked back at him. “I’m sorry to have bothered you.”

Ryan waited to see if she would turn around again, but she didn’t. When the light went out on the porch he pulled away from the curb.

Phoebe closed the door behind her with a soft click. Through the small window she saw the lights of Ryan’s car as he drove off.

What had she expected? That he would immediately say, “I’ll take care of you, I’ll be there for you”? She moved through the house without turning any lights on. She knew where every piece of furniture and every lamp was located. With the exception of the few times that Joshua had been home during their marriage, no one had lived with her. Nothing was ever moved unless she did it.

Their marriage had consisted mostly of them living apart. They had met when she was eighteen and fresh out of school. The tall, dark man dressed in a uniform had taken her breath away. Joshua had made it clear what it would be like, being married to a serviceman, and she had been willing to take on that life. She was strong and could deal with it.

It hurt terribly that his parents had said they wouldn’t be around to help her with the baby. He or she needed grandparents in their life. With her parents gone they were the only ones. She’d been devastated when she’d received the letter stating they would not be coming around. They had sent some money. Phoebe had thought about returning it but had decided to start a fund at the bank for the baby instead. Not knowing their grandchild would be their loss.

For her the baby was about having a small part of Joshua still in her life. Her hope was that Joshua’s parents might change their minds. Either way, right now she was on her own. Not a feeling she enjoyed. In a moment of weakness she’d gone to Ryan’s house, but she didn’t plan to let him know how bone deep the hurt was that Joshua’s parents wanted nothing to do with her. How lonely she was for someone who’d known and loved Joshua.

She turned on the lamp beside her bed and glanced at the picture of her and Joshua smiling. They’d been married eight years but had spent maybe a year together in total. That had been a week or two here, or a month there. They had always laughed that their marriage was like being on vacation instead of the day in, day out experience of living together. Even their jobs had been vastly different. Joshua had found his place in the service more than with her. She’d found contentment in teaching. It had given her the normalcy and stability that being married to a husband who popped in and out hadn’t.

Each time Joshua had come home it had been like the first heart-pounding, whirlwind and all-consuming first love that had soon died out and become the regular thud of everyday life. They’d had to relearn each other and getting in the groove had seemed harder to achieve. As they’d grown older they’d both seemed to pull away. She’d had her set life and routine and Joshua had invaded it when he’d returned.

Removing her clothes, she laid them over a chair and pulled her pj’s out of the chest of drawers. She groaned. The large T-shirt reminded her of a tent that she and Joshua had camped in just after they’d married. The shirt was huge and still she almost filled it.

Pulling it over her head, she rubbed her belly. The baby had been a complete surprise. She’d given up on ever having children. She and Joshua had decided not to have them since he hadn’t been home often enough. She wasn’t sure whether or not she’d cared when they’d married or if she’d believed he would leave the army and come home to stay. The idea of having a family had been pushed far into the future. It had become easier just not to consider it. So when she’d come up pregnant it had been a shock.

Her fingers went to her middle, then to her eye, pushing the moisture away. She’d grown up with the dream of having a family one day. Now she was starting a family but with half of it missing.

She pulled the covers back on the bed and climbed in between the cool sheets. Bringing the blanket up around her, she turned on her side, stuffing an extra pillow between the mattress and her tummy. The baby kicked. She laid her hand over the area, feeling the tiny heel that pushed against her side.

The last time Joshua had been home they’d even talked of separating. They’d spent so little time together she’d felt like she hadn’t even known her husband anymore. She not only carried Joshua’s baby but the guilt that he’d died believing she no longer cared. Friendship had been there but not the intense love that she should have had for a husband.

CHAPTER TWO

THE NEXT MORNING Ryan flipped on the light switch that lit the stairs that led down to his workshop. He’d picked out this town house because of this particular space. Because it was underground it helped block the noise of the saws from the neighbors. The area was also close to the hospital, which made it nice when he had to be there quickly.

Going down the stairs, he scanned the area. A band saw filled one corner, while stationed in the center of the room was a table saw. The area Ryan was most interested in right now was the workbench against the far wall. There lay the half-made chair that he had every intention of finishing today. He would still have to spend another few days staining it.

Picking up a square piece of sandpaper, he began running it up and down one of the curved rockers. He’d made a couple of rockers when the nursery of the hospital had needed new ones. A number of the nurses had been so impressed they’d wanted one of their own. Since then he’d been busy filling orders in his spare time.

Outside the moments when a baby was born and offered its first spirited view of the new world with a shout, being in his shop was the place he was the most happy. Far better than his life in the military.

When he could stand it no longer, he’d resigned his commission. He’d had enough of torn bodies. He ran his hand along the expanse of the wood. It was level but not quite smooth enough. Now he was doing something he loved. But thoughts of Phoebe kept intruding.

He couldn’t believe that had been Joshua’s wife at his home the night before. Ryan had been living in Melbourne for five years. Joshua had always let him know when he was home, but in all that time he’d never met his wife. It had seemed like his friend’s visits had come at the busiest times, and even though the two of them had managed to have a drink together, Ryan had never seen her. Now all of a sudden she had turned up on his doorstep.

Even after he’d gotten her calmed down he hadn’t been sure what she’d wanted. It didn’t matter. Still, he owed Joshua. He should check on her. But first he’d see what Sophia could tell him.

The next morning, at the clinic, Ryan flipped through his schedule for the day. He had a number of patients to see but none had babies due any time soon. Maybe he would get a few days’ reprieve before things got wild again.

“You look deep in thought.”

He recognized Sophia’s voice and looked up. “Not that deep. You’re just the person I wanted to talk to.”

The slim woman took one of the functional office chairs in front of his desk. “What can I do for you?”

“I was just wondering what you know about Phoebe Taylor.”

“Trying to steal my patients now?” Her eyes twinkled as she asked.

Ryan gave her a dubious look.

She grinned. “She’s due in about five weeks. What’s happened?”

“She was waiting for me when I got home yesterday. At first I thought she’d gotten my name and address from you. That you were sending her to me because you would be on your honeymoon when it was time to deliver.”

Sophia shook her dark-haired head. “Oh, no, it wasn’t me. But I remember she mentioned you at one of her appointments and said she had your address.”

“I thought maybe she was looking for a midwife. She later told me she was the wife of an army buddy of mine.”

“Yes, she told me that you were good friends with her husband. Did she seem okay?”

“Not really. It was all rather confusing and she was quite emotional. I let her get warm, gave her something to drink and took her home.”

“She’s usually steady as a rock. I’ll find out what’s going on at her next appointment.”

“Thanks, Sophia. I owe her husband.”

“I understand. You are coming to my wedding, aren’t you?”

Sophia was marrying Aiden Harrison in a few weeks and she wanted everyone there for the event. Ryan wasn’t into weddings. He’d never been so close to someone he’d felt like marrying them. After his years in the military he was well aware of how short life could be. Too young to really understand that kind of love when he’d entered the army, he’d soon realized he didn’t want to put someone through what Phoebe Taylor had been experiencing.

He didn’t understand that type of love. Knew how fleeting it could be. His parents sure hadn’t known how to show love. His foster-parents had been poor examples of that also. They had taken care of his physical needs but he’d always been aware that they hadn’t really cared about him. The army had given him purpose that had filled that void, for a while. That had lasted for years until the hundreds of faces of death had become heavier with every day. He well understood that losses lasted a lifetime. Even delivering babies and seeing the happiness on families’ faces didn’t change that. Those men he’d served with were gone. Yet, like JT, they were always with him.

He smiled at Sophia. “I plan to be there. I’ll even dust off my suit for the occasion.”

“That’s great. See you later.”

Ryan had seen his last patient for the day and was headed out the glass doors of the Prenatal Clinic in the hospital. A woman was coming in. He stopped to hold the door for her, then glanced up. It was Phoebe Taylor.

“Ah, hey.”

“Hello.” Her gaze flicked up at him and then away.

Phoebe must have been coming here for months. How many times had he passed her without having any idea who she was? She looked far less disheveled than she had two days ago. Her hair lay along her shoulders. Dressed in a brown, tan and blue dotted top over brown slacks and low-heeled shoes, she looked professional, classy and fragile.

“Are you looking for me?” Ryan asked.

“I’m here for my appointment with Sophia.”

Another mother-to-be came up behind Phoebe. She moved back and out of the way, allowing the woman to go past her. Ryan held the door wide, moving out into the hall. He said to Phoebe, “May I speak to you for a minute?”

A terrified look flicked in her eyes before she gave him a resigned nod. He had the impression that if she could forget they had already met, she’d gladly do so.

Before he could say anything she started, “About the other evening. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have put you on the spot. I had no right to do that.”

Here she was the one apologizing and he was the one who should be. “Not a problem. I should have visited you after Joshua died.”

Her look was earnest. “That’s all right. I understand. Well, I have to get to my appointment.”

Apparently whatever she’d needed had been resolved.

“It was nice to meet you, Phoebe.”

“You, too.” She walked by him, opened the door and went through it. With a soft swish it closed behind her.

Why did he feel as if he needed to say or do more?

Ryan made it as far as his car before curiosity and a nagging guilt caused him to return to the clinic. He waited until Phoebe was finished with her appointment. Phoebe might not agree to him taking her to dinner, but he was going to try. He needed to know why she’d come to see him and even more if there was some way he could help her.

Now that she had contacted him he felt like he owed Joshua that.

On the way to his office he passed a nurse and asked that she let him know when Mrs. Taylor was finished.

Thirty minutes later the nurse popped her head in the door and said Phoebe was on her way out.

Ryan hurried to the waiting room and spotted her as she reached the door. When he called her name she stopped and turned. Her eyes widened in astonishment, then filled with wariness.

“I thought you had left.” Phoebe sounded as if she had hoped not to see him again. After his behavior the other night he shouldn’t be surprised.

“I came back. I wanted to ask you something.”

She raised her brows.

Phoebe wasn’t opening the door wide for him. She wouldn’t be making this easy.

Thankfully this late in the day the waiting room was empty. “I wondered if I could buy you dinner?”

Phoebe turned her head slightly, as if both studying and judging him. He must have really put her off the other evening. He prided himself on his rapport with people, especially pregnant women and their families. He had let this one down. The guilt he’d felt doubled in size.

“Please. I’d like to make up for how I acted the other night.”

“You don’t owe me any apologies. I’m the one who showed up on your doorstep unannounced.”

“Why don’t we both stop taking blame and agree to start again?”

Her eyes became less unsure. “I guess we could do that.”

“Then why don’t we start by having a burger together?”

“Okay.” She agreed with less enthusiasm than he would have liked.

“I know a place just down the street that serves good food. Andrew’s Burgers.”

“I’ve heard of it but never been there.”

“Great. Do you mind walking?”

“No, I haven’t had my exercise today.”

Ryan looked at her. If it hadn’t been for the baby, she would have been a slim woman. With her coloring she was an eye-catcher, pregnant or not. Her soft, lilting voice was what really caught his attention.

“If you’ll wait I’d like to lock up my office.”

She nodded. When he returned she was sitting in one of the reclining chairs in the waiting room with her hands resting on the baby.

“I’m ready.”

Phoebe looked at him. She pushed against the chair arm to support herself as she stood. “I think this baby is going to be a giant.”

“Every mother-to-be that I see thinks that about this time.”

As they made their way down the hall to the elevators, Ryan asked, “So how’re you and the baby doing?”

A soft smile came to her lips. “Sophia says we’re both doing great. I’ll have to start coming to clinic every week soon. I just hate that I’m losing her as my midwife. I’ve become very attached.”

“You are getting close.”

“I am.”

There was depression in her tone that he didn’t understand. He knew little about her, but she struck him as someone who would be ecstatic about holding a new life in her hands and caring for someone. Yet he sensed a need in her that he couldn’t put a finger on.

They went down the six floors to the lobby of the art deco building and out into the sunlight. The restaurant was a few blocks from the hospital.

“Let’s cross the street. I know a shortcut through the park.”

She followed him without question. A few minutes later they exited the park and were once again walking along the sidewalk. A couple of times they had to work themselves around other people walking briskly in the opposite direction. Ryan matched his stride to her shorter one and ran interference when someone looked as if they might bump into her.

“I can walk without help, you know.”

He glanced at her. She was small but she gave off an air of confidence. It was in complete contrast to her actions that night at his house. Something was going on with her. “I know, but I wouldn’t want you to accidentally fall and Sophia would have my head for it.”

“I think they gave up chopping off heads in Australia a long time ago,” she said in a dry tone.

“Still, I’m kind of scared of Sophia. I don’t know if I could face her if I let you get hurt.”

That got a smile out of her. “Here we are,” Ryan said as he pulled the glass door of the restaurant open and allowed Phoebe to enter ahead of him.

She wasn’t sure sharing a meal with Ryan was such a good idea. He’d asked nicely enough and she hadn’t eaten out in so long she hadn’t had the heart to say no. She suspected either his curiosity or some kind of obligation he felt toward Joshua had made him ask. No way had he changed overnight into being the emotional support she’d naively hoped he might be. A nice meal shared with someone was all she expected to get out of the next hour.

When Ryan was asked if they wanted a booth or table he glanced at her middle and grinned. He had a wide smile and nice even teeth. “I guess we’d better go for a table.”

They were directed to one. The restaurant was decorated in a 1950s diner style, all chrome, red-covered chairs and white tile on the floor. Lighting hung over each booth and table. It was still early for the dinner crowd so it wasn’t noisy. Phoebe wasn’t sure if she considered that good or bad.

She took a seat. Ryan sat in the chair across the table from her.

“So I need to order a hamburger, I’m thinking.” Phoebe took the menu out of the metal rack on the table.

“They have good ones. But there are also other things just as good.”

The waitress arrived and took their drink order. Phoebe opened a menu but Ryan didn’t. When the waitress returned with their glasses, she asked what they would like to order. Phoebe decided on the burger without onions and Ryan ordered his with everything.

The waitress left and Ryan asked, “No onions?”

“They don’t agree with me.”

“That’s typical. I know a mother who said she couldn’t cook bacon the entire first three months of her pregnancy.”

“Smells used to bother me but that has become better.”

Ryan crossed his arms and leaned on the table. “So do you know if it’s a boy or a girl?”

“I don’t know.”

“Really?”

Phoebe almost laughed at his look of shock. “Don’t want to know. I like surprises.”

“That’s pretty amazing in this day and age where everyone is wanting to know the sex and you don’t. I wouldn’t want to know, either. One of my favorite moments during a delivery is the look on the parents’ faces when they discover the sex.”

Phoebe got the impression that she’d gone up a notch in his estimation.

“You know, I don’t know any other male midwife.”

“There are only a few of us around. More in Australia than in the US.”

“So why did you become one?”

“I wanted to do something that made me smile.” He picked up his drink. “I was tired of watching people’s lives being destroyed or lost when I was in the service. I wanted to do something that involved medicine but had a happy ending. What’s better than bringing a life into the world?”

He was right. What was better than that?

The waitress brought their meals. They didn’t speak for a while.

It fascinated Phoebe that they were virtual strangers but seem to be content sharing a meal together. This evening stood in sharp contrast to when they had met. Being around this Ryan put her at ease for some reason. After their first meeting she would have sworn that couldn’t be possible.

She ate half her burger and chips before pushing them aside.

“You’re eating for two, you know,” Ryan said with a raised brow.

“The problem is that when this baby comes I don’t want to look like I ate for three.” She wiped her mouth with her napkin and placed it on the table.

“How’s your weight gain?”

Phoebe leaned back in her chair. “That’s certainly a personal question.”

“I’m a midwife. I ask that question all the time.”

“Yes, but you aren’t my midwife.”

He pushed his empty plate away. “I’ll concede that. But I’m only asking out of concern.”

“If it’ll make you feel better my weight is just fine. I’m within the guidelines.”

“Good. You look like you’re taking care of yourself.”

“I try to eat right and get some exercise every day.” She looked pointedly at her plate. “Not that this burger was on the healthy chart.”

He shrugged. “No, it probably isn’t, but every once in a while it’s okay.”

They lapsed into silence again as the waitress refilled their glasses and took away their plates.

A few minutes later Phoebe said, “I know this might be tough but I was wondering if you might be willing to tell me some stories about Joshua. Something I could tell the baby. Something about him outside of just what I remember.”

Ryan’s lips tightened and he didn’t meet her gaze.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

After a moment he met her look. “What would you like to know?”

“I guess anything. I feel like you knew him better than me. You spent far more time together than we did. I was wondering how you met?”

Ryan’s gray eyes took on a faraway look. “The Aussie and the US troops didn’t always hit it off, but JT and I did. We didn’t usually work together, but I was asked to go out on patrol with his platoon. Their medic was on leave and the replacement hadn’t made it in yet. My commander agreed. It was supposed to be an easy in and out of a village under our control. All went well until we were headed out, then all hell broke loose. The Iraqis had us pinned down and we couldn’t expect help until the next morning.

“A couple of JT’s men were seriously injured. While we spent long hours hunkered down together we got to know each other pretty well. He told me about you, and I told him about growing up in Texas.