For the Sake of His Child

She waited beside a glider on the porch, her face partially hidden by flower-filled hanging baskets, though he caught a quick impression of her tall, slim form and long golden hair. As before, the Border collie stood by her side.

Picking up a suitcase and taking his daughter’s hand, he climbed the wide steps to the porch. Jake couldn’t help feeling as though he and Andrea were new kids on the first day of school.

Brynn stepped closer, gesturing to the entry-way. “Andrea, your room is at the top of the stairs, first door on the left.”

Jake gripped the large suitcase more tightly, glancing at the backpack hanging from his daughter’s other hand. When Brynn offered to help her get settled in, Andrea stepped back, and Jake sensed her distress. “I can carry the suitcase upstairs, get her unpacked.”

“That will be fine. I made some sandwiches and lemonade. I’ll carry them out to the terrace.”

Grateful for her sensitivity, Jake climbed the stairs with his daughter. The room Brynn had chosen for Andrea was both soothing and cheerful. Freshly picked sunflowers and other wildflowers he couldn’t identify were arranged in vases around the room, providing bursts of color. Sage-green walls framed the wide, tall window.

Andrea listlessly accepted his help, not caring where her belongings were put. She dragged her feet as they walked downstairs. Even though he knew this stay was for her benefit, Jake couldn’t repress his guilt, sensing her confusion and fright.

“Annie, Mrs. Alder’s going to help you. And I’m only a phone call away.”

She didn’t look reassured.

His heart heavy, Jake draped one arm over Andrea’s shoulders as they walked out to the cobbled terrace.

Brynn waited for them at a redwood table also decorated with sunflowers. As they approached, she poured the lemonade. “I’m always parched after a long drive.”

“Looks good,” Jake agreed, accepting a glass.

Andrea ignored the cool drink as Shamus settled beside her. Hesitantly, the girl petted his shaggy head. Remembering how she’d responded to the dog on her first visit, Brynn was encouraged. Often animals could reach children when no human could.

Once they’d eaten, Brynn took them on a tour of the house and immediate grounds. Inside the hazy, sunlight-pricked interior of the barn, bales of clean hay were stacked in a stair-step fashion, and a small tack room smelled of aged leather. Six horses were stabled in generous stalls. The Fords had always loved riding on the land they owned.

Julia was the last of her family, and the ranch was important to her. Even though these days she didn’t live on the old homestead, Brynn was certain her friend would never sell the property. It meant too much to her.

Walking farther into the barn, Brynn spotted Roy Bainter, a local man who had cared for the Fords’ horses for decades. He and his wife, Mary, lived close to town. To date, Roy was the only local she’d met. Brynn had found that he was kind but taciturn, with a soft spot for kids.

“Hello, Roy. I’d like you to meet some new friends.”

The older man removed his hand from the mane of the horse he was grooming. The animals loved Roy, and the horse nudged his shoulder with her muzzle.

Jake chuckled. “Looks like we’re making the filly jealous.”

Roy met Jake’s gaze with an appraising one of his own. “You know horses?”

Jake nodded. “I took lessons, then rode regularly at a stable in the city. But that was a lot of years ago.”

“Mebbe. But a man doesn’t forget the things that count.”

The men shook hands.

Brynn continued the introductions. “And this is Jake’s daughter, Andrea.”

Roy glanced down at the girl, who didn’t speak. “Good, a quiet one. She’ll do.”

Andrea’s eyes showed a glimmer of surprise.

“You know anything about horses, girl?”

Brynn didn’t think she would answer. But then Andrea slowly shook her head.

“Well, you’re young enough to learn. This here’s Lizzie. Most of the time she’s a good old girl. Now and then she thinks she’s the queen of England and I gotta call her Elizabeth.” Roy glanced up at Brynn. “Mary baked an extra pie. I put it in the kitchen.”

She hadn’t noticed either the pie or his entry, Brynn realized. But it was the custom of the area, and doors weren’t kept locked. She’d tried to take Julia’s advice and not panic at the innocent gestures. “Thank you, Roy. We’ll enjoy it.”

Seeing that Andrea was intrigued with the horses and not paying attention to her father, Brynn touched Jake’s arm, gesturing toward the wide, open double doors.

Jake accompanied her outside. But he looked back, his gaze lingering on Andrea, his expression troubled.

Watching him, Brynn understood the unspoken emotion. Although he’d fought to bring Andrea here, he hated leaving her. “Once Andrea and I become more acquainted, I think we’ll get on well.” She smiled gently, hoping he could take reassurance from the words.

“I’m sure you will.” He shifted his glance from his daughter. “I’m going to stay in Walburg for a few days, to be close by.”

Brynn frowned.

“What is it?”

“I don’t know much about Walburg, but I doubt there’s a motel.”

He looked at her curiously. How could she live in this remote area and not know much about the closest town? “I’ll find something. Now I’d better say goodbye to Andrea.”

Retracing his steps, he approached his daughter and took her hand. “Remember, Annie, Mrs. Alder is going to help you.”

He nearly lost his resolve when a tear escaped her eye. Instead, he bent down for a final but fierce hug.

“I’ll phone,” he promised after releasing Andrea. “And you have my cell number.”

Roy turned away, busying himself with the horse feed.

Realizing Andrea wasn’t going to reply, Jake forced himself not to look back as he left the barn.

Brynn stood beside the corral. “I know you’re worried about her. I would hate to leave a troubled child of my own with a stranger.”

Jake searched her face, hoping he’d made the right decision, that he was wise to place his trust in this woman.

Her kind smile seemed to say that she understood his concerns, that it would be all right.

Even though she shut the gate quietly after he passed through it, the closing sounded so final. Realizing that lingering wouldn’t help Andrea, he climbed into his SUV and drove back to the main road.

Once he reached Walburg, it didn’t take long to drive its meager streets. He spotted a church, a school, various stores and small businesses, an old-fashioned hamburger place and even an additional small eatery. But he didn’t see a motel or inn.

He stopped at the gas station and began pumping fuel. Jake didn’t see anyone until the he’d replaced the pump, his tank full. A man dressed in neat but well-used overalls emerged from the garage. Jake handed over his credit card. “Is there a motel or boardinghouse nearby?”

“The closest is probably in Kalochton. Not much of a place, but it’d do in a pinch.”

“How far is Kalochton?”

“About fifty miles.”

An hour’s drive. He wanted to be closer. “And if it’s full, how far is another one?”

“Another fifty miles. But the place in Kalochton’s never full except during Octoberfest.”

Jake accepted his receipt. “Thanks for the information.”

“Thanks for your business. Stop by again if you’re in town.”

The unexpected small-town courtesy reminded Jake of days past, when hospitality had been the trademark of small businesses. A time before one-stop superstores had changed rural America. “I’ll do that.”

Encouraged by the man’s friendliness, Jake considered it a good sign that Andrea would be close to this community.

Traveling on the two-lane road, he found it took an hour and a half to reach Kalochton. All that could be said for the motel was that his room had an adequate bed—although it had to be pulled out from the wall. And once down, the Murphy bed filled the room. There was no desk on which to spread out the contents of his packed briefcase, and between a very spare shower stall and a small sink, the minuscule bathroom had just enough space to turn around in.

Unconcerned about the accommodations, Jake phoned the ranch. Mrs. Alder answered, saying there was nothing to report. She didn’t attempt to falsely assure him that all was well. They both knew Andrea was far from well.

Although exhausted by the emotional upheaval, Jake knew he couldn’t nap during the day; his restless energy never allowed it. He was accustomed to staying in hotels around the world, where his work always absorbed him. But now, even after he’d unrolled a set of plans, he couldn’t concentrate. All he could see was his daughter’s tortured face, the pull of her pleading eyes. And the woman who might well be Annie’s last chance.

BRYNN RUBBED HER FOREHEAD, trying to fend off the beginnings of a headache. It had been a long day, this first one with Andrea. That wasn’t uncommon. Most young teens initially resented being sent to her. Andrea, however, didn’t display resentment, but rather hopelessness. And that, Brynn knew, was far more difficult to overcome.

She’d had one small victory. Convincing Andrea to drink a fortified milkshake wasn’t a huge accomplishment, but the steps to recovery were often small.

Now, Andrea had gone to bed. She was docile about accepting the rules. But the apathy was hard to take. Brynn glanced at her watch. Enough time had passed that Andrea should be asleep.

Walking quietly, Brynn entered the guest room, accompanied by the quiet clicking of Virgil’s toenails. The small night-light she always left on glowed in the still room. Shamus, who had stuck close to Andrea all day, was stretched out beside the bed.

Stepping around the dog, Brynn studied the girl. Even in sleep, she looked agitated. Brynn gently stroked back the hair that fell over Andrea’s cheek, remembering how she had often done the same to her daughter. It was one of the many things she missed. In twelve years of tucking Sarah in, no day had been complete without that ritual.

Sighing, she stepped back, stooping to pat Shamus, then went out quietly, leaving the door ajar so she could hear Andrea if there was a problem in the night.

Once back in her own room, Brynn strolled to the window. Outside, the sky was clear and dark, unmarred by city lights. The quiet, the peace…it had helped her these past months. But the nights were still bad—the loneliness of her bed, the lack of someone with whom to talk over all the big or little events of the day.

Her cats, Bert and Ernie, were curled up on the pillow next to hers. The terriers, Molly and Duncan, were stretched out on the thick rug beside the bed. But Virgil wouldn’t rest until she did. After climbing into bed, Brynn picked up the book on her nightstand. But her mind traveled from the page to the child down the hall. After an hour, she gave up trying to read and turned off the light. Sleep was usually elusive, but she hoped it would come tonight.

Some time later, in that blurry state before being truly asleep, Brynn jerked awake when she heard a piercing scream. Heart racing, she touched her lips, wondering if the scream had come from her own mouth, as it had so often in the past, the product of her continuing nightmares.

But the wail continued. Jumping from her bed, Brynn tore down the hall and into Andrea’s room. The child’s eyes were still closed, her body rigid, held in the grip of a nightmare.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, Brynn gently grasped the girl’s shoulders. “Andrea, wake up, sweetie. Come on. Wake up.”

Andrea’s eyes opened and she flinched. A rapid pulse was visible in her thin throat. Patting her back, Brynn spoke motherly, comforting words, but Andrea didn’t respond. Terror convulsed her, then huge, wrenching sobs erupted.

“Andrea, it’s all right. It was a nightmare. Scary, I know, but not real.”

Andrea shook her head in denial. “It’s real! I’m here!” Through the words, she gasped for breath.

It hit Brynn what she meant. Apparently feeling abandoned by her father, Andrea thought the nightmare was her life. Brynn couldn’t let the child believe her father would desert her as her mother had. “Annie, do you want me to call your dad?”

The girl’s quivering head finally bobbed up and down.

“I’ll go phone. Shamus and Virgil will stay with you.” Directing Virgil to stay, Brynn hurried downstairs to locate Jake’s number. She didn’t want to explain the nightmare in front of Andrea, yet she worried about leaving her alone for long. Luckily, Jake grasped the situation quickly and agreed to come at once.

Back upstairs, Brynn did her best to comfort Andrea, but the girl’s sobbing continued. Brynn knew how it felt to have her heart broken. But it was worse, far worse, seeing it happen to a child.

CHAPTER FOUR

THE BEDROOM WAS QUIET when Jake entered. Andrea was curled in the fetal position, her face red and puffy. The dog that had taken a liking to his daughter stood beside the bed, watching him carefully.

As Jake sat down on the edge of the bed, the mattress dipped under his weight, alerting Andrea. As soon as she saw him, she broke into tears, the sobs wrenching her thin body.

Instinctively he drew her close to his chest. “Annie, it’s me. You’re safe now.”

But her sobbing continued.

“I told you I was only a phone call away.”

She pulled back, staring at him doubtfully.

Jake searched her eyes, remembering Brynn’s words. She thinks you’ve abandoned her. Could Brynn be right? Did Andrea really believe that? “Annie, you’re here only because you need help that I don’t know how to give.”

“Will you stay with me?” she pleaded.

“Why don’t I sit with you until you fall asleep?”

Her eyes clouded and Jake wondered what he’d said that was wrong. Since Val had left it seemed nothing he did was right. After several minutes passed, he patted her shoulder. “I need to talk to Mrs. Alder, then I’ll be right back.”

He could hear Andrea’s continued sniffling as he left the room and headed downstairs to the den. Wordlessly, Brynn handed him a mug of steaming coffee.

“Thanks,” he murmured gratefully.

“I thought you might need it. How’s Andrea?”

“A little better. I told her I’d stay with her until she falls asleep. Actually, I’d like to stay with her the night. Will that wreak havoc with your house rules?”

“No. Andrea needs you tonight.”

“Thank you, Mrs. Al—”

“Call me Brynn, please. You’ll find an extra blanket in the bedroom closet.”

“That’s kind of you.”

“It’s going to take time with Andrea, Mr.—”

“Jake,” he interrupted.

“Jake,” she repeated, her soft voice giving his name a lilt he’d never heard before. “But, however long it takes, I won’t give up on her.”

Gratified, Jake nodded. “I’d better get back to Andrea.”

“I’ll leave the lights on in the den, and if you need me, my room is at the end of the upstairs hall.”

Once back in Andrea’s room, he moved the desk chair next to the bed. She watched him, her eyes anxious.

“Try to sleep, Annie.”

“You won’t leave, Daddy?”

His heart clenched. It had been a long time since she’d called him “Daddy.” He thought that had gone the way of Santa Claus and the tooth fairy. “No, I won’t leave.” At least not tonight. Surely her reaction was simply first-night jitters.

Watching as Annie’s eyes began to droop, he hoped Brynn had a touch of magic in her arsenal.

AFTER A NEARLY SLEEPLESS night, Brynn gave up the battle and rose early, deciding they would all need a substantial breakfast. She’d checked on Andrea twice during the night. Both times she was asleep, but her father wasn’t. It didn’t look as though Jake had moved. He’d lifted his gaze long enough to acknowledge Brynn’s presence each time, but neither of them had spoken, not wanting to waken Andrea.

Reaching the kitchen, Brynn opened the door for the dogs. All of them, except Shamus, who hadn’t left Andrea’s room, loped outside. Ignoring the frisky animals, Bert and Ernie strolled behind them, delicately stretching until the path was clear.

Measuring the coffee, Brynn decided to make it strong. For a moment she stared out through the kitchen window, thinking of her daughter. Why hadn’t she seen the symptoms? So caught up in her grief over Kirk, had she simply not seen what was right in front of her?

Remembering how Sarah had loved French toast, Brynn whisked the egg mixture, hoping it might appeal to Andrea, too. Although she hadn’t seen Andrea when she was well, Brynn suspected that rather than going through an abrupt change, the child had slowly faded, emotionally and physically. Faded away until her state of mind was painfully obvious. Thinking again of Sarah, Brynn bit down on her bottom lip as a stray tear escaped. How could she have blinded herself to the most important thing in her life?

Hearing Jake clear his throat from across the room, she hastily swiped at the tear, composing her face. “Is Andrea awake?”

He looked at her curiously but didn’t pry. “Yes. She’s getting dressed. Coffee smells good.”

Swallowing the lump in her throat, Brynn managed a small smile. “The mugs are in the cabinet on your right.”

Pouring his own coffee, he glanced at the food she was preparing. “Looks good.”

“After a rough night, I thought we could all use the reinforcement.”

“I remember when Andrea used to consume a stack of pancakes, a bowl of cereal, and then be ready for more within an hour. These days…”

Hearing the wistful note in his voice, Brynn wanted to offer him some encouragement. “Yesterday she drank a milkshake. I’d added vitamin-infused protein powder, disguised by ice cream. I think it was a step in the right direction.”

He looked at her gratefully. “Your reputation is well earned.”

“There’s still a long way to go, I’m afraid. A lot of depressed kids lose their appetite. That’s why I keep the protein powder and ice cream on hand. It’s hard to resist a milkshake.”

“By the time I realized Andrea had a problem, I couldn’t tempt her with anything.”

Brynn thought of her own failure to recognize Sarah’s pain. “Don’t beat yourself up about it. You’re doing something now.”

Nodding, he sipped the steaming coffee.

Brynn added cream to her own coffee. “Let’s see how today goes. After breakfast, I want to work with Andrea on my own.”

“I’ll be at the motel in case…” His words trailed off as Andrea silently entered the kitchen. Jake remembered the many times he’d pleaded for quiet when she’d bounded into a room, a flurry of movement and noise. “Morning, Pooh.” The old nickname slipped out, one he’d affectionately called her years before when she’d become obsessed with Winnie the Pooh.

She looked startled. “Morning.” The word was mumbled, but at least she’d replied. Shamus entered the kitchen with more noise than Andrea had.

“Would you let him out?” Brynn asked.

“Okay.” As Andrea did, the other dogs rushed in, pushing past her to look for their own breakfast.

“I hope you like French toast,” Brynn commented.

Andrea shrugged thin shoulders. “I’m not hungry.”

“Then I’ll only put a small portion on your plate.”

Jake noticed Brynn hadn’t put the food on a serving platter, instead arranging it on individual plates. Andrea didn’t have to reach for anything, and the food was harder to ignore when placed right beneath her nose.

Flanked by adults, Andrea stared at her breakfast, then finally took a bite of the fragrant toast.

Jake glanced up, meeting Brynn’s encouraging gaze. It was a small step, but he felt a bit of hope. And for today it was enough.

AFTER JAKE LEFT, Brynn worked to breach Andrea’s apathy. First she assigned her a small chore, that of checking the pets’ needs—their drinking water and sleeping quarters. The job was a simple one, but Brynn knew Andrea needed some responsibilities. And Shamus was by the girl’s side again.

Brynn smiled at her. “Shamus has never taken to anyone so quickly or completely before.”

Andrea gave her usual shrug, but couldn’t conceal the spark of light in her gaze.

“Dogs are the best judges of people, you know.”

This time there was no shrug.

“I spoke to your doctor yesterday morning. With his approval, your dad and I agreed to begin easing off your meds.”

This time Brynn was certain she saw interest in Andrea’s expression. “Is Dad coming back tonight?”

“Why don’t we see how it goes this evening?” she suggested.

Andrea retreated again, until Shamus pushed his head against her arm. She hesitated, then petted the adoring animal. “When do we start with my meds?”

“Tonight. How does that sound?”

She petted Shamus again. “Okay.”

Studying her expression, Brynn saw the barely concealed desperation. But she wasn’t going to fail this child. This child so like her own Sarah.

MINDFUL OF ANDREA’S fragile state, her susceptibility to a suicide attempt, Brynn had come to a difficult decision. That evening, she’d phoned Jake, asking him to bring an overnight bag. Now he paced the den as she outlined her suggestion that he stay at the ranch.

She saw the indecision on his face. “I’ve been trying to assess what she needs. And my instincts tell me that she needs you more than anything.”

He paused. “I understand that.”

“I’m not sure you do.” Brynn leaned forward. “Jake, you and Andrea need to learn how to communicate all over again.”

He frowned. “She’s ill because her mother left.”

“And because your relationship with her isn’t filling the void.”

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