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Child Wanted
Lindy wanted to simply agree and be done with it, take the job and spend her summer with Jerry until she got her son back for good, but that seemed way too easy. “Mrs. Bowers, I appreciate this opportunity. And I really need and want the job, but I have to be honest. You haven’t said anything about me filling out an application, and you should know that I don’t have any experience. In fact—” her voice hitched “—there are no real reasons you should hire me.”
Savvy’s grandmother leaned forward in her weathered brown desk chair, watching Lindy with undeniable kindness, as if she were sitting with her own granddaughter. “Honey, which part of me praying for you, and then you walking in didn’t you understand?” She placed her hand on top of Lindy’s as she spoke, and the warmth of it radiated up Lindy’s arm and straight to her heart.
“Mrs. Bowers, I can’t tell you how much your trust in me means, especially since you just met me.” Truthfully, Lindy couldn’t understand why the couple would have that kind of faith in a woman they didn’t know.
“Sweetie, my trust is in God, and He hasn’t steered me wrong. He sent you here today, I’m certain of it.” She gave Lindy an exaggerated wink.
In spite of what Lindy had learned about God from the prison ministry, she still wasn’t certain how much He could actually do. Or how He could keep her past from crippling her future. And her past would come out, along with the fact that, even though she was innocent of murder, she hadn’t protected her child. But regarding this position, she had no one to vouch that she’d be a good employee. Her grandmother had passed away six months after Lindy had been convicted. “I don’t have any references.”
“God sent you. That’s the only reference I need. And from what Savvy said, you don’t have a place to stay in Claremont yet. Is that right?”
Not only did she not have a place to stay, she didn’t have much of anything else either. She’d need more clothes for sure, but she’d seen a cute little consignment shop on the other side of the square that might have decent clothes at a price she could manage. “I don’t have a place to stay,” she admitted.
“Well, then, I meant to tell you that part of this job includes staying on-site, in case we have any after-hours deliveries and things like that. We have a little apartment upstairs where you can live, so that you’ll be here to help us out for those kinds of things.”
Lindy couldn’t help but ask, “Mrs. Bowers, was that a part of the job before you knew I needed a place to stay?”
“Now, sweetie, I know you’re not trying to talk me into fibbing,” she said, tilting her head in a “don’t go there” gesture that melted Lindy. “It’s a part of the job now, and that’s what matters. And the place isn’t anything fancy, but it’ll do.”
Lindy swallowed thickly, nodded and felt another batch of tears coming. She’d gone three years without a single droplet, and now the floodgates had opened.
The woman pointed a finger at Lindy. “Hey, now, we don’t allow tears in here. That’s cause for firing, you know.” Then she laughed, which sounded more like a teenager’s giggle than a grandmother’s. “Just kidding. Let me find you a tissue.”
“It’s okay. I have this.” Lindy held up Ethan’s handkerchief, wiped at her face and again smelled that crisp masculine scent that reminded her of the man who seemed so perfect. She finished dabbing at her face and put the handkerchief away. “I’ll be fine. I just haven’t had anyone be this nice to me in...a while.” Except for the heart-stoppingly handsome man who had given her the handkerchief...and who wanted her son.
“Well, then, we both had prayers answered today, I’d say.” Mrs. Bowers peeked around Lindy. “Oh, hello. You must be Ethan. Savvy told us about you, and how you’re planning to adopt that precious little boy.”
Lindy turned, surprised to find him behind her and wondering how much he’d heard. She hated the way her heart tripped over itself at the sight of the good-looking man, the same way it had fluttered the first time she’d seen Gil Flynn. When would she ever learn? She was in no place to think about romance. In fact, the only thing she should be thinking about—focusing on with every fiber of her being, rather—was her son.
Ethan cleared his throat, one corner of his mouth lifting as though he knew how his mere appearance affected her heart rate. “I apologize for interrupting, but Mr. Bowers said you would have the supply list for the Fishers of Men program, and it looks like I’m going to need to purchase some fishing equipment for me and Jerry.”
“Is that so?” Mrs. Bowers clasped her hands together. “Well, isn’t that nice?” She shifted toward the desk and moved stacks of papers and files and sports magazines aside. “You know that you do have the option to rent the equipment, if you’d rather not have that kind of investment in it.”
“Brodie told me, but to tell you the truth, I don’t want Jerry to see anything I do with him as temporary. I want him to know I’m here to stay.” The other side of his mouth joined in for a full, pulse-skittering grin.
But Lindy was nowhere near smiling in return, especially after hearing he planned on a long-term commitment...with her son.
Mrs. Bowers, however, grinned broadly. “That’s so wonderful!” She withdrew a sheet of paper from a manila folder and handed it to Ethan. “Here you go then. We’ve got a bunch of kids signed up from Willow’s Haven, and the church is still matching them with mentors, but we should have all of our supplies in the store and ready to get started by Monday.” She handed the file to Lindy. “You’ll be the main one running the program, so I might as well give you this.”
Lindy accepted the folder, opened it and glanced down at the list of supplies, which included a fishing schedule at the bottom of the page.
“So we fish twice a week?” Ethan must have noticed the same thing.
“You do. Either Monday and Wednesday, or Tuesday and Thursday. You’re welcome to come on Fridays and Saturdays, too, if you want, but we don’t open on Sunday. That day is for the Lord,” Mrs. Bowers said, then turned her attention back to Lindy. “And you’ll be helping them with supplies, manning the store at the fishing hole while they’re all fishing, that type of thing. It isn’t a difficult job, but you’ll be busy.”
“I see that,” she said, still scanning the schedule, “but that’s okay. I like being busy, and I sure need the work.”
Mrs. Bowers gave her another wink and clicked her tongue against the roof of her mouth. “You’re gonna be a pro at this, I can tell.”
“I hope so,” Lindy said, praying that she would also be a pro at interacting with her son and proving that she deserved him in her life again.
Mrs. Bowers tapped the paper. “They have forty-eight kids at Willow’s Haven. We’ve divided them into two groups, so you’ll have twenty-four who come Monday and Wednesday with their mentors, and then the others come Tuesday and Thursday. And like I told Ethan, they all have the option of fishing on the weekends, too, if they want. That may be more work hours than you had intended.”
“It’s fine,” Lindy said. More than fine, because she’d be showing the court that she could earn an income while also getting more time with Jerry. “In fact, it’s perfect.”
“Wonderful!” Mrs. Bowers clasped her fingers beneath her chin as though Lindy really had been the answer to her prayers.
And maybe she had.
Lindy leaned forward and hugged the lady. “Thank you, Mrs. Bowers. This—this is perfect.”
“No. Thank you, dear.”
Ethan cleared his throat. “Well, since I’m going to be mentoring Jerry, I guess we’ll be seeing each other on a regular basis, too.”
Lindy’s stomach roiled. “I guess we will.”
Chapter Three
Lindy unpacked an assortment of fishing tackle on Monday morning, her skin bristling with nerves about the day ahead. Surely she’d interact with Jerry, and hopefully she’d hear from the attorney about starting the process of getting her son back in her life. The two things she’d yearned for—prayed for—throughout the weekend.
But she’d also see Ethan Green. And she certainly hadn’t yearned for that. He was too appealing and way too charming. The kind of guy a court would believe had Jerry’s best interests at heart and could supply his every need.
And the kind of guy who might be a bad parent behind closed doors, the way Gil had been.
“Would you mind putting a bunch of those colorful sponge fish in the new display out front? I want the Willow’s Haven children to see some of their choices in the window before they enter the store.” Mrs. Bowers smiled. Lindy realized she did that quite a lot. She hadn’t seen a lot of smiles, if any, over the past three years. She attempted one in return, but she feared it came out as timid as she felt.
Thankfully, the woman didn’t seem to notice. She pointed toward the checkout counter. “There’s a new box over there by the cash register if you want to use those. Sound good?”
“Sure, I’d be happy to.” Lindy scooped up the box and carried it to the front, climbed around the curtain separating the display from the store and opened it to view a rainbow of soft sponge fish that the kids would use to practice casting. She withdrew a bright red one and squeezed it between her thumb and forefinger. Jerry had always preferred his red toys as a baby. His red rattle. His red plastic truck. She suspected he’d select at least one red fish for his practice bait.
She placed the squishy fish near the window, then began situating the other colorful sponges in and around the seams of aqua blue tulle that created the “water” in the window. The kids were due to arrive in an hour, and she, as well as Mr. and Mrs. Bowers, had been busy all morning getting everything ready.
So intent on making the area look nice for Jerry and all the other Willow’s Haven children, Lindy didn’t notice anyone enter the store, or she’d have been marginally prepared for the startlingly handsome man with an equally shocking husky voice who suddenly joined her in the tiny space.
“Can I help?”
Lindy dropped a fistful of fish, so that a clump of the vibrant bait covered one of the seams and looked more like a multicolored loofah than individual fish. But what woman would be able to concentrate—or hang on to those miniature sponges—with Ethan Green this near? He was tall, dark and dangerous. Maybe not dangerous to everyone, but definitely to Lindy, since he planned to adopt her son.
She prayed the new attorney, Ted Murrell, would take her case and that she could get away from—and get Jerry away from—this intimidating man.
“Sorry.” His mouth inched into a crooked grin that somehow made him even more appealing. “I didn’t mean to scare you. I assumed you heard me enter.”
But the goosebumps traveling up her arms had nothing to do with his sudden appearance and everything to do with how the mere presence of the mesmerizing male made her pulse race.
When would she ever learn?
Lindy moistened her lips, gathered her composure and accepted the fact that the man working his way into the display window had no intention of leaving. “No, I didn’t hear you. I—had my mind on other things.” Like wondering if red was still her little boy’s favorite color. And praying that she could somehow get a court to pick her over Ethan.
“I get that way sometimes, lost in my thoughts, usually when I have one of my students on my mind. So many kids growing up in broken homes, you know, and they bring that with them to the classroom.” He shrugged and reached for a handful of fish. “Sometimes I’m the only father figure in a kid’s life. I know I’m the teacher and not the dad, but it’s still a big responsibility, having that kind of impact in a child’s world.”
Lindy found her hand in the box at the same moment that he reached inside. Their fingers brushed, and she yanked hers out without capturing a single fish.
He noticed, studying her hands, now clenched against her stomach, and then looking at her with confusion...and speculation.
Don’t ask why I’m so jittery. Don’t. Ask.
Except for the prison guards and, on rare occasions, her state-appointed attorney, she hadn’t been around any men over the last three years. And she feared this one more than any other because he was eerily similar to the male who’d fooled her so well—and hurt her so deeply—in the past. Charming. Disarmingly good-looking. And appealing in an “I could be your very best friend and also an absolutely amazing husband” kind of way.
Before he could mention her nervousness, she tried to get the conversation back on track. “It’s nice that you’re a father figure to those kids.” She picked up the discarded fish and placed them sporadically around the fabric. “Is that what made you want to adopt Jerry?”
Of all the kids needing a good home, why had he selected her son?
His eyebrows dipped and his mouth eased to the side as though he wasn’t sure he wanted to answer. Had she said too much? Could he tell how badly she wanted to know why he’d picked her kid?
“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. That was probably too personal of a question for me to ask.” She pushed the fabric of her skirt aside to place more of the fish in an empty space, ignoring the way his eyes studied her, making her feel as though he somehow sensed the torment in her soul.
She needed her son in her life, and this magnetic man was her biggest obstacle.
God, please help me.
He took a deep breath, let it out and answered, “I’ve wanted to adopt Jerry for three years now, ever since I saw his story on the news.”
Lindy’s pulse accelerated so quickly she could feel her blood pushing in her veins, but she managed to hang onto the sponge fish and quietly asked, “His story on the news?”
“You may have seen it—” he shrugged “—or not. I made a point to watch for it each night after I heard about what happened. He was just over a year old and had been abused. I couldn’t stand the thought of a child being hurt, beaten by his father.”
“Bless his heart.” Though anyone would make the same statement, no one would mean the words as much as Lindy. She hated that Jerry had been hurt, and she’d done her best to stop it.
She just hadn’t been strong enough.
“I decided that I wanted to take care of him, to adopt him. I wanted to be the kind of father to him that he never had.” He lifted a shoulder. “I missed him this weekend. I just met him, and I missed him already. Hard to believe, huh?”
“Yes.” Did she believe him?
“I went back to Birmingham for the weekend,” he said.
“So you aren’t staying in Claremont?” If he was driving back and forth from Birmingham, a two-hour drive each way, he’d have less time to spend with Jerry.
“Oh, no, I’m staying here for the summer.” He scooted backward to rest against the wall, settling in as though he planned to chat a while. “I just had to go get my things from my house.”
Lindy pushed her back teeth together to fight the urge to frown. He wasn’t driving back and forth each day. And he owned a house. A place where Jerry could live that probably had a neighborhood filled with potential friends, a big backyard where he could play and maybe even keep a puppy, and was undoubtedly located in a good school zone.
The kind of place she’d always wanted to live with her son.
She, on the other hand, was staying rent-free in a small room above the sporting goods store. Free, until you get on your feet, Mrs. Bowers had said.
How long would that take? And would the court believe she could ever get on her feet? Would anyone trust her to take care of her son?
The first attorney she’d contacted after being released had homed in on the fact that would hurt her the most in court. Regardless of whether or not she abused Jerry, she hadn’t stopped Gil or reported him to the authorities. Lindy knew she should have, but she also knew that he would have killed her if she did.
Then who would’ve protected Jerry?
That attorney had turned her case down, but the one from this morning had sounded as though he was considering representing her.
Ethan shifted his large frame against the wall, and Lindy found her attention focusing on his broad shoulders, the hard plates of his chest, visible in spite of his shirt, and biceps that didn’t appear to have come from merely lifting papers in a classroom.
More goose bumps traipsed across her skin. She was so easily captivated by this beautiful man.
“I hadn’t planned on staying here for the summer,” he admitted, while Lindy tried to focus more on his words and less on his appearance. “I actually thought I could pick Jerry up last week, take him home and foster him until the adoption finalized. I went through the ten weeks of fostering certification classes and everything, but then the social worker and the state decided I should spend more time with him first, so he doesn’t end up going through another placement that doesn’t work out.”
She was glad she’d been focusing on his words; she hadn’t heard anything about a prior placement for her son. “What do you mean, another placement that doesn’t work out?” She knew very little about what had happened to her baby over the past three years, but this hint at Jerry’s past didn’t sit well with her. What had happened to him?
“The previous family decided they didn’t want him.” Ethan shook his head. “Gotta tell you, it’d probably be a very good thing if I never meet that couple who’d decided not to keep him.”
Lindy’s stomach instantly churning, she turned to face him as he tucked more fish in and around the blue water. “Why didn’t they want Jerry?” She’d assumed he’d always been in homes like Willow’s Haven. Of course, Lindy had only learned bits and pieces about Jerry’s location from the state social worker who’d had pity on her after she’d been released from Tutwiler Prison. She’d had to put the woman’s cryptic clues together to even find out where the state had placed him. But she’d found him. And now she had to figure out how to get him back in her life permanently.
“Hard to believe, isn’t it?” The concern in his tone sounded sincere. “Apparently, he wasn’t as social as they’d have liked, and he cried too much.” In his left hand was a fish, and Lindy watched as his right one curled into a fist.
Was he like Gil?
“I don’t have any sympathy for people like that, turning their backs on a child because of what he’s been through, as if he could control his past. Kids need someone they can count on.”
Lindy swallowed. “Yes, they do.” And Jerry could count on her. He could. If only a court would agree.
Ethan leaned a few fish against the corner. “I couldn’t wait to get back to Claremont and see Jerry this morning. I think that’s why I showed up so early.” He grinned. “And to help a lady in need with her window display.”
“I don’t need anything,” Lindy said quickly. Too quickly, from the way his eyebrows inched up and his mouth flattened. She cleared her throat. “I mean, I could’ve handled it, but I appreciate the help.”
A lie. An outright lie. But it was out there, and Ethan didn’t look as suspicious, so she let it stand.
Sorry, God. I’m out of my element here, and I’m clearly slipping.
A tap on the window caused both of them to turn toward a little redheaded, freckle-faced boy who was waving, while his mother stood behind him, also waving at the pair in the window. Lindy held up a hand, and Ethan did, as well. Then the two passed by the store and headed toward an old-fashioned barber shop, complete with a red-and-white-striped pole by the entrance.
“Maybe I’ll take Jerry there for a haircut one day, since we’ll be in Claremont for the summer. That’ll be some good father-son bonding, too.” He picked up a green fish and held it toward Lindy as he spoke. “I sure hadn’t planned on spending the summer fishing. Don’t know the first thing about it.” He shrugged slightly and gave an easy grin. “But it’ll be fun learning with my little man.”
His references to her son bothered her immensely, but she did her best to hide the emotion and prayed again that Ted Murrell would take her case, in spite of her inability to pay him anytime in the near future.
A group of children darted across the grass in front of the fountain, and Lindy leaned toward the window. “Is that them?” she whispered anxiously, then felt more anxious being in closer proximity to the man beside her. She cleared her throat and scooted back, glad that he didn’t seem to notice.
The cluster of six or seven kids entered the Tiny Tots Treasure Box, the toy store on the opposite side of the square.
Ethan checked his watch. “We still have twenty minutes until eleven, but I’m anxious to see them, too. Really looking forward to spending time with Jerry again.”
“I saw him yesterday.” She wasn’t sure why she divulged the information, but she’d started now, so she’d finish. “At church. I went to church with Mr. and Mrs. Bowers, and all of the Willow’s Haven kids came together.”
He put the fish against the window and nodded. “Candace mentioned that they all go to Claremont Community Church, and I plan to attend, as well. I couldn’t yesterday, of course, since I was in Birmingham. How did he seem? Did you get a chance to talk to him? I thought he started coming out of his shell a little on Friday.”
His concern seemed so genuine that Lindy was momentarily taken aback. Did he already care about Jerry? Really care?
But then she remembered the doting-father act that Gil put on in public.
“I didn’t get to talk to him.” The words hurt, because she’d hoped to communicate with her little boy, but the Willow’s Haven children all sat together, and Mr. and Mrs. Bowers had kept her busy meeting all of their friends after the service until the bus filled with children had returned to the home.
“Right. I’m sure there were a lot of people at the service. Not sure why I thought you would have talked to my little man.”
The “my little man” thing hurt, but she didn’t want him to think she didn’t care about Jerry. “I would have, but I didn’t get the chance.”
“Well, we’ll both see him—and all of the other kids from Willow’s Haven—soon, won’t we?”
Soon? She’d been counting the minutes. “Yes, we will.”
Scanning the display, he asked, “Do you have fishing rods that go with these practice fish? Maybe we could put a few against the sides so the kids can see them.”
Lindy had been so wrapped up in thoughts about her son and trying to avoid the effect Ethan Green had on her senses that she nearly forgot why they were sitting in the store window. “We have several boxes in the back. I’ll go get one.”
He held up a palm. “Let me. You have a lapful of fish.” He pointed to her fish-covered skirt and then moved the curtain aside to exit the display area.
Lindy hadn’t realized what she’d done, but she’d been so determined not to accidentally touch him again that she’d grabbed an abundance of fish from the box, rather than risk slipping her hand inside...and finding his.
God, I’m struggling here. I need Your help. She thought of her little boy, placed in a home where he wasn’t happy and where the parents didn’t soothe him when he cried. And please help Jerry to be okay. And let me help him, Lord. Let me have him in my life again. I need him. I need him so very much.
“Found them.” Ethan entered the display area holding one of the boxes filled with child-sized rods and reels. But with the box of fish already centering the display, there was hardly room for the man and the additional props.
“Maybe I should put them out on my own. It’s getting a little crowded.” Lindy reached for the box of fish so she could move it toward her, and her hands met the cardboard edge at the same moment as his. But this time, his palms covered hers, and when she jerked her attention to his face, he looked at her as though wondering just how badly she wanted to remove them.
* * *
Ethan had been trained to spot children who had been abused. In fact, he’d been required to view an extensive video series on the subject that had made him extremely uncomfortable. However, he had been able to spot the signs more clearly after learning what to look for.