Her Sweet Surrender: The First Crush Is the Deepest

‘You really are serious about retiring?’

‘Totally,’ Amber replied and smiled at Saskia. ‘But talking to you two has reminded me where my real priorities lie.’ And then she reached out and squeezed Saskia’s hand for a second. ‘Your aunt Margot gave me a sanctuary at Elwood House, and I haven’t forgotten it. I owe you. This is why I’m thinking of doing something rather rash.’

‘What do you mean by rash?’ Saskia asked in her low, calm, gentle voice.

Amber took a long drink of coffee, well aware that both of her friends were waiting for her to speak.

‘When you told me all about your plans to convert Elwood House into a private meeting and dining venue I was amazed that we hadn’t thought about it before. Your dining room is stunning.’

Her voice drifted away dreamily. ‘I gave my first piano recital in that house. I’ll never forget it. The crystal chandeliers. The flickering firelight. It was magical. This is why I want to do as much as I can to help make Elwood House a success.’

Saskia shook her head. ‘You have already invited half the fashion models in London, their agents, their posh friends and the music industry to your birthday party this week. I couldn’t ask for better publicity.’

‘And yet you still don’t have a decent website or booking system or photo gallery to showcase the house. And that. Is where I come in. And you can stop shaking your head; I know that you won’t take my money. So I am going to ask a professional photographer to come over and put together your full marketing package and organise the website. Free. Gratis. Won’t cost you a penny.’

‘Really?’ Saskia replied and lifted her mug towards Amber in a toast. ‘That’s fantastic. Is he one of your fashion pals?’

Amber licked her lips and took a sip of water before answering.

‘Not exactly. I think Sam Richards is calling himself a photojournalist these days. More tarts, anyone?’

Amber paused and looked at Kate, who was groaning with her head in her hands. ‘Don’t worry about Sam. He knows that he has to be on his very best behaviour if he has any chance of that interview. Saskia needs those photos and Sam seems to know which end of a camera to point. And no, I haven’t forgiven him yet. Think of this as part of the payback. So please don’t kill him. At least not in front of the party guests. Saskia does not want bloodstains on her nice carpet.’

The words had barely left Amber’s mouth and the shouts were still ringing in her ears when the oven timer bell rang and Kate shook her head slowly from side to side before diving back into the kitchen to get fresh supplies of snacks.

‘Don’t burn your mouth by eating them straight out of the oven,’ Saskia called out to Kate, but then her mouth relaxed into a half smile. ‘Payback. I suppose that is one way of looking at it and I have no doubt that he would do a good job. But sheesh, Amber. I am worried for you.’

Amber was just about to rattle off a casual throwaway remark, but instead she paused before answering one of her few real friends in the world. The old Amber would have laughed off her friend’s concern with a flippant gesture as some sort of silly joke, but the new Amber was slowly getting used to opening up to people she loved and trusted. ‘You always did like Sam, didn’t you?’

Saskia gave a brisk nod. ‘I suppose so. Not in any sort of romantic way, of course, nothing like that, but yes, I did. His dad had driven my aunt Margot around for years and sometimes he brought Sam along with him. I suppose that’s why I suggested that your mum use his limo service to take her to venues.’

Saskia lifted one hand. ‘I think I might even have introduced you. So blame me for what happened. But yes, I thought he was okay.’ Her brow squeezed together. ‘Why do you ask me that now?’

‘Because it was so weird. Over the years I sometimes imagined what I would say if I met up with Sam unexpectedly at some airport or hotel, or if he came to one of my performances. But when I saw him yesterday? All those clever, witty put-downs just fled. He was still the same Sam, working in his dad’s garage. And I was right back to feeling like a gawky, awkward, six feet tall seventeen-year-old with big feet who was trying to sound all grown-up and clever around this handsome, streetwise city boy.’

Amber looked up at Saskia and shrugged. ‘I trusted him then and he let me down just when I needed him the most. How do I know that I can trust him now? The orphanage in India is too important to me to see the real message buried under some big celebrity exposé which is around the world in seconds. Can you imagine the headlines? “Brave Bambi DuBois cheats death from meningitis. Career in tatters.” Oh, they would love that.’

‘Which is why you are taking control. Maybe there is too much history between the two of you for him to be objective. But we agreed that we would give him an audition for the job, and that is what we are going to do. Okay?’

‘Absolutely okay. If he can stand it, then so can I.’

‘Right. And on the way you can make sure that Sam gets the message that you have moved on to even more handsome and successful boyfriends. But fear not. Kate and I will make sure that we rub it in at regular intervals that he made a horrible mistake when he let you go and you are so totally over him.’

‘Saskia! I didn’t say anything about being cruel. And as for being over him? Sam only had to smile at me yesterday and I got the tingles from head to toe. Which is so ridiculous I can hardly admit it. The last time that happened I ended up on a plane to Kathmandu with a suitcase full of evening wear and piano music and no clue about what I was going to do when I got there.’

‘Mark the mountaineer?’

Amber nodded. ‘And three years before that it was Rico. Racing car driver. One kiss on the cheek and a cuddle in the pits and I smelt of diesel fumes for months.’

Amber sighed dramatically and slumped back. ‘I am a hopeless case and I know it. I mean. A mountaineer? What was I thinking? I got the tingles and that was that.’ She blinked a couple of times. ‘The only scientific explanation is that I was cursed at birth. You know how it goes. The good fairy godmother blesses me with some musical talent, and the evil one says, “Oh, that’s sweet, but in exchange you are going to fall for men who will only ever be interested in their obsession. So you had better get used to the idea.”’

‘You weren’t thinking. You were taking a chance on love with remarkable men,’ Saskia replied wistfully. ‘You know. Not all of us have had a chance to be cuddled by racing car drivers or kissed at Everest base camp. I envy you for having the courage to take that risk.’

Amber instantly sat up and wrapped her arm around Saskia’s shoulder. ‘You’ll meet someone—I’m sure of it. Especially now you’re opening up Elwood House. Think of all the handsome executives who will be queuing up to sample your tasty treats.’

‘From your lips... But in the meantime, where does that leave our Sam Richards? Because, to me, this little plan of ours could go in one of two ways. Either you keep your cool and freeze out his tingle power so that you can finally get Sam out of your system and your life. Or...’

Saskia smiled and pushed out her lips. ‘You might be tempted to try out the new and improved version to see if the quality of those tingles has improved over the years. And don’t look at me like that. It’s a distinct possibility. Dangerous, scary and not very clever, but a possibility...and that worries me, Amber. I know how much you cared about Sam. I was there, remember? I don’t want to see you running back to Elwood House in tears over Sam Richards.’

‘Sam?’ came a squeaky voice from the bedroom and a second later its owner appeared on the patio and she was not carrying more snacks.

Kate was wearing a huge fascinator in the shape of a red tropical flower on her head and several strings of huge beads cascaded below bundles of silk scarves. ‘You don’t have time to think about boys, woman!’

Kate gestured with her head towards the dressing room, which had long since given up any hope of being used as a second bedroom. ‘Amber DuBois, you are officially one of the worst hoarders I have ever seen. And I make clothes for women who are still wearing their mother’s hats. You have been crushing stuff into those cupboards for years. I am frightened to open those wardrobes in fear of avalanche.’

Amber waved one slender hand in the air. ‘I know. I spent most of yesterday trying to root out casual day clothes to wear and ended up going to the shops. I have got so used to just dumping my stuff here that when I want something I cannot find it.’

Amber frowned and pushed her lower lip out. ‘Is it normal to have more performance dresses than pants? I love dressing up for my audiences, but I find it so hard to refuse when designers start giving me free gorgeous things to wear. Most of those dresses have only had to survive one recital. It does seem a shame to just stash them until they gather dust. Unless, of course...’

She grinned and looked from side to side. ‘Ladies. I have been looking for some way of raising funds. What do you say to a spot of dressing up in the name of decluttering? I am talking Internet auctions and second-hand designer shops.’ A wide grin creased her face as she was practically deafened by shrieks from Saskia and Kate. ‘I’ll take those screams as a yes. Right. Then let’s get started on those ball gowns. But girls—there is one condition. You do not touch the sacred shoes. Okay? Okay. Let’s do it. I’ll race you.’

SIX

Sam Richards leant against the back wall of the elevator, propped his camera bag against his foot and crossed his arms as he enjoyed the view.

Two tall, very slender brunettes dressed from head to toe in black had rushed in at the last minute from the cream and caramel marble reception area to Amber’s apartment building, gushing thanks and flooding the space with giggling, floral perfume and an empty garment rail which took up the whole width of the elevator. Judging by their sideways glances, indiscreet nudging and body language, they were not too unhappy with being crushed into the space with him, and any other time and place he might have started chatting and enjoying their company.

But not today.

His morning had already got off to a poor start when his dad had phoned from France saying that he was going to stay on a few more days because for once the weather in the Alps was perfect for a spot of touring.

Perhaps it was just as well. His dad had not exactly been sympathetic when Sam had told him about Amber’s little scheme. In fact he had laughed his head off and told him to behave himself.

As if he had a choice.

Sam pressed his hands flat against the cool surface of the elevator wall.

Amber had the upper hand and he was going to have to go with it, but it didn’t mean to say that he liked it. One. Little. Bit. He had stopped being at other people’s beck and call the day he’d left London and there was no way he was going to step into the role of Amber’s fool and like it.

But he would get through it and move on. He could survive being pulled back into Amber’s high class life as a diva for a few days.

If she could stand it—then so could he.

Sam inhaled the perfumed air, which was suddenly overheated and cloying. He had no interest in this world of fashion and celebrity—he never had. The A-list party and clubbing circuit had long lost their appeal for him. It was his job and he worked hard to create something interesting and new out of the same old shallow gossip and the relentless need for fame and riches fuelled by the public obsession for celebrity—an obsession he helped to foster, whether he liked that fact or not.

Past tense. He had paid his dues and earned the right to sit behind that editor’s desk, doing the job he had been trained for. And he wasn’t going to let that slip away from him without a fight.

He had come a long way from the raw teenager with a fire in his belly that Amber had known.

Man enough for the job? Oh, yes, he was man enough for the job all right.

Even if he had no clue what the actual job was. Her text message had asked him to bring his camera bag and a screwdriver over and they were all the clues she had given him.

Sam rolled his shoulders back as the elevator slowed and the girls starting fidgeting with the clothes rail.

The elevator doors slid open on the floor number Amber had given him but, before he could stride forward with his bag, the girls swept out into the wide corridor of pale wood and pastel colours.

Interesting.

Unless, of course...

With a tiny shoulder shrug Sam slowly followed the girls towards the penthouse apartment. Lively disco dance music drifted out through an open door towards him, the beat in perfect tune with the rattle of their high heels on the fine wooden floor.

Disco music? If this was Amber’s place, she must be out shopping for the morning. The only music Amber DuBois liked was written by men with quill pens and dipping ink hundreds of years ago.

The girls rolled the garment rail into the apartment, waved at someone inside, then swept back past Sam out into the hallway, arm in arm in a flutter of perfume and girly giggles.

He paused for a second to admire them, then turned to face the door.

This was it. Show time. He took a deep breath, pushed the door open another few inches, stepped inside the apartment and instantly went into sensory overload.

What looked like the entire contents of a large fashion boutique was scattered over every surface in the living room. Handbags, shoes, hats and assorted female fripperies were draped across sofas, chairs and tables in a wild riot of colours and patterns, illuminated by the daylight streaming in from the floor to ceiling patio doors at the other end of the room.

His first reaction was to step back into the corridor and call the whole thing off. Right then and there. Apparently there were some men who enjoyed going clothes shopping with their wives and girlfriends. He had never understood how they could do that. There was probably medication for that kind of mental self-affliction.

He had never done that kind of crazy and he had no intention of starting now.

But he couldn’t leave. And she knew it. Which meant that Amber had to be here to witness the payback in person.

Time to get this over with.

Sam sniffed, pushed his shoulders back, stashed his bag behind the sofa so that it was out of the mayhem and by stepping over the entire contents of a luggage department, he wound his way through the obstacle course that was the corridor towards the source of the disco music.

He had been on racing circuits which had fewer chicanes than this room.

Sam paused at the open bedroom door and leant casually on the door frame, his arms crossed.

It was a long, wide room but surprisingly simply furnished with a large bed with an ivory satin quilt, a small sofa covered in a shiny cream fabric with flights of butterflies painted on it and a wide dressing table next to more patio doors.

One complete wall was covered with a floor to ceiling mirror.

And standing in front of the mirror were three girls he had last seen together at Amber’s eighteenth birthday party, what felt like a lifetime ago.

Amber, Saskia and Kate were wearing lemon-yellow oversized T-shirts with the words ‘ALL SIZES’ printed on them in large black letters. Kate was in the middle, moving her hips from side to side and jiggling along to the disco music and holding a hairbrush to her mouth as a microphone. Saskia and Amber were her backup singers. Kate could not be more than five feet four inches tall in heels, Saskia was a few inches taller in flat shoes and Amber—Amber had been six feet tall aged sixteen.

It stunned him to realise that he could recognise Amber’s voice so easily. She could sing like an angel and often had at Christmas concerts and birthday parties. Kate was the best singer in their little schoolgirl clique so Amber had left her to it and stayed on the keyboard, but she had such a sweet, clear voice. He had missed that voice. And whether he liked it or not, he had missed the sound of Amber whispering his name as she clung on to him with her arms looped around his neck.

Sam pressed back against the door frame.

A memory of those same three girls wearing those same yellow T-shirts at Margot Elwood’s house came drifting back. It was someone’s birthday party and the girls had put together a little musical routine for Saskia’s aunt and Amber had asked Sam to join in the fun. Strange. He had not thought about Elwood House in years.

These three girls looked the same—but he knew that they had all changed more than he could have imagined. But these three girls? In those T-shirts? It was a blast from a happier time when they all had such wonderful dreams and aspirations about what they were going to do with their lives.

This was a bad time to decide to become sentimental. Time to get this started.

He banged hard on the door with the back of his knuckles and called out in a loud voice, ‘Is the lady of the house at home? The help has arrived.’

They were so intent on singing along to the words of some pop tune from the nineteen nineties that it was a few seconds before Saskia even glanced in his direction.

She instantly stopped dancing, put down her can of hairspray microphone and nudged Amber in the ribs before replying, ‘Hi, Sam. Good to see you.’

‘Hey. We were just getting to the chorus,’ Kate complained, then turned towards him and planted a fist on each hip and tutted loudly, but Sam hardly looked at the support band.

His whole attention was focused on the girl who was peeking out at him over the top of Kate’s head.

In contrast to the fresh, floral Amber who had waltzed into his dad’s garage, this version of Amber had donned the uniform of the full-on casually elegant fashion world.

The T-shirt was V-necked and modest enough to cover her cleavage but fashionably off centre so that a matching azure bra strap was exposed over one shoulder as she moved. Her collarbone formed a crisp outline.

Amber had never been overweight, but it seemed that she was paying the price of working with fashion designers.

She was too skinny. Way too skinny.

She had tied her broken wrist into a long blue scarf with pink and gold threads which ran through it to form a kind of halter neck.

The shade of blue matched the colour of her violet eyes. Perfectly. And, without intending to, Sam’s gaze was locked onto those eyes as though he was seeing them for the first time.

Her hair was clipped back behind her head in a simple waterfall. She wasn’t wearing any make-up from what he could see and did not need any.

He wondered if she realised how rare that truly was. Yes, he had met stunning girls in Los Angeles—the city was full of them.

But Amber DuBois was the real deal.

No doubt about it.

The lanky, awkward girl who had never known what to do with her long legs and arms and oversized feet was gone.

For good.

Replaced by a woman who looked totally comfortable and confident in her own skin.

This was the Amber he had always known that she would become one day, and he was suddenly pleased that she had realised just how lovely she truly was. And always had been.

Now the world had the chance to see Amber the way he had once seen her. As a beautiful, confident woman with the power to take his breath away. Just by looking at her.

‘Hi, trouble,’ she replied casually with a bright smile as though she were greeting an old friend, which was about right. ‘You are right on time.’

He gave her a mock salute. ‘Reporting for duty as ordered.’

Her small laugh turned into a bit of a cough, then she turned back to Kate and Saskia and pressed her cheek lightly to each of them in turn. ‘Thanks, girls. I’ll see you the same time tomorrow. Oh—and don’t forget to check online about the shoes. Bye. Bye for now.’

Amber stepped past Sam and waved to Kate and Saskia as they carefully wove their precious cargo of bags and suit carriers down the hall towards the front door, laughing and chatting as they went, with only the occasional backwards scowl from Kate over one shoulder to indicate how pleased they were to see him again. Not.

Only then did Amber turn back to face Sam, her hand resting lightly on one hip.

‘I cannot believe that you actually came.’

‘So you weren’t serious about the audition? Great!’ Sam replied, pushing himself off the door post and dusting his hands off and patting his pocket. ‘Shall we get started now? I have my trusty tape recorder right here.’

Amber exhaled explosively and held up both hands. ‘Not so fast. I was perfectly serious—you have to audition for this gig.’

Sam lifted both hands as he grinned at her.

‘Well, here I am. This is me proving that you can trust me to keep my word and do whatever it is you need me to do. Your personal slave is ready for action. So let’s get started.’

‘Oh, now don’t tempt me,’ Amber murmured under her breath, then she lifted her chin and peered at him through creased eyebrows. ‘You had better come into my bedroom.’

Sam blinked several times. ‘I am liking the sound of this already.’

She closed her eyes and shook her head. ‘And I am regretting it already. Do not even try and flirt with me because it won’t work. Okay?’

‘Methinks the lady doth protest too much,’ Sam replied, then winced at the searing look she gave him. ‘Okay, I get the message. I am a snake who cannot be trusted. So. Let’s get this game of charades started. What is the first thing on that long list of yours?’

Amber pressed her forefinger to her full, soft pink lips and pretended to ponder.

‘You may have noticed that I am having a bit of a declutter at the moment.’

‘Declutter? Is that what you call it? I have to tell you that, despite reports to the contrary, my knowledge of female clothing is not as great as you might imagine. So if you are looking for fashion advice...’

Amber jabbed her finger towards the bedroom wall right in front of them, which was covered with a framed collection of artwork, portraits of Amber and old sheets of music manuscripts.

‘I need someone to take my pictures down so I can decorate. It is a bit tricky one-handed and some of them are quite valuable. I vaguely recall that you can handle a screwdriver. Think you can manage that?’

Sam stepped forward so that they were only inches apart.

‘Bambi, I can handle anything you throw at me.’

She took a step closer, startling him, but there was no way that he was going to let her know that.

‘Oh, this is only the start. I have a very, very long list.’

‘I expected nothing less.’

He turned to go back into the living room, and then looked back at Amber over one shoulder. ‘And don’t worry. I won’t tell anyone that you couldn’t wait to drag me into your bedroom the first chance you could get.’ He tapped one side of his nose with his forefinger. ‘It will be our little secret.’ And with that he strode away from Amber, leaving her wide-mouthed with annoyance, delighted that he had managed to squeeze in the last word.

SEVEN

Two hours later Sam had taken down the framed pictures from the walls of two bedrooms, a kitchen and a hallway, covered them in bubble wrap and packed them into plastic crates already stacked two high along the length of Amber’s hall, before starting on the living room.

The barrage of noise, telephone calls and visitors had slowly faded away as the morning went on so that by the time he had unscrewed the last of the huge oil paintings and modern art installations in the living room, he didn’t have to worry about stepping on Amber’s peep toe sandals as she worked around him, or accidentally brushing plaster dust onto some fabulous gown which had been casually thrown over a chair or garment rail.

It took superhuman effort but for most of that time he kept his eyes on the rawl plugs and loose plaster behind the pictures instead of the long, lean limbs of the lovely woman who brushed past him at regular intervals in the hallway, leaving a trail of scented air and a cunning giggle in her wake.