Her Valentine Hero

Coming home and hearing Erik’s name had dredged up the bad feelings and her guilt. Now she had to work at disposing of them and forgiving herself for her pitiful decision. One thing she’d learned about maturing. Strength and wisdom came with age and experience. At least it had for her, all except one thing. Though she knew the Lord forgave her for her mistake, she hadn’t forgiven herself. But that was years ago, and now she’d learned even more about herself and about men in general. She had her fill of them. Nothing would make her change her—

“Hell-o.”

The singsong greeting jarred her thoughts. She gave Rainie a guilty smile. “I was on a little time travel.”

Rainie tilted her head. “Any place interesting?”

“Not really.” She didn’t want to get into her mental mess even if Rainie was her best friend and her confidant. Her intimate relationship with Erik was the one thing she’d never shared.

“Come on. What were you thinking?”

Her friend’s persistence could drive her loco. “High school. The prom.” She ran her hands along the soft fabric. “That’s the last time I wore a formal.”

Rainie’s grin sank. “You and Erik.” She shook her head. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to bring that up, but then that should be water over the dam as they say.” Her grin returned.

“Lots of water.” She managed to grin back. “Jonny told me Erik’s divorced.”

“Right. He is.” Her eyes widened. “When did you see Jon?”

Neely’s pulse skipped. “You call him Jon, too.”

“What else? Now that he’s six foot two and built like an athlete, Jonny doesn’t fit him.” She curled up her nose. “Don’t you think?”

“I suppose, but he’ll always be Jonny to me.” Her chest tingled, and the reaction jarred her. She pushed the feeling away and gazed down at the gown.

Rainie nodded. “I’m so glad you like the choice. Do you think the bridesmaids will?”

Neely ran her hand down the bodice of the silky fabric. “What’s not to like? I think it will flatter most figures.”

“I thought so, too.”

She turned toward Rainie. “Why didn’t you tell me what a great-looking guy Jonny turned out to be?” Another sensation trilled along her skin, like a wisp of hair she tried to brush from her face but could never find.

Her eyes widened. “He’s my brother. Why would I tell you about his looks? I don’t think about it.” She drew back. “Anyway you always called him a pest and ignored him, so why would I mention him?”

Jonny had said the same, and she still didn’t have an answer that made sense. Rather than trying to sort it out, she eyed herself in the mirror again. “I can take the gown off, can’t I? We both love the style.” She turned her back to Rainie, and motioned her to unzip the dress.

When she stepped out of it, Rainie hung it on the hanger and then faced her. “The bridesmaid dresses are just like yours except they’ll be a deeper shade of spring green.”

“Sounds pretty.” Neely stepped into her jeans and pulled them up.

Rainie eyed her a moment. “You still didn’t answer my question about Jon. When did you see—”

Neely waved her words away. “On the high school track.” As she dressed, she gave her a short summary, anxious to change the topic.

“And you had dinner?” Rainie’s eyebrows touched her hairline. “That’s interesting.”

Her expression roused Neely’s curiosity. “Why?”

“I think you’re the first girl he’s taken to dinner in a long time.”

She waited for more, but Rainie just looked at her. “Doesn’t he date?”

“A guy that good-looking would, but he never seemed to get serious about any of them until a year or so ago, and then I expected to hear wedding bells.”

Her chest constricted, picturing Jonny with a wife.

“He dated Jeannie longer than anyone else.”

Neely drew air into her depleted lungs. “Jeannie? Anyone I’d know?”

“I suppose you do. Jeannie Hunt.”

“Jeannie Hunt?” The question shot out of her like a bark. “The cutesy little cheerleader from the tenth grade?”

“The same.”

That knocked the wind out of her. Now that she thought about it, Jonny hadn’t told her anything about himself when they’d talked. She faced the mirror again, eyeing her dark hair, a face that could be lost in a crowd, and a figure that she hid beneath loose fitting apparel like her jogging pants. Jeannie had been a petite blond with curves in the right places and a face that could have been on a Barbie doll. She spun around again. “What happened between them?”

Rainie shrugged. “I don’t know. He stopped talking about her, and when I asked, he just blew it off.” Rainie slid the curtain aside, and stepped into the alteration room as if the subject had ended.

Neely’s mind was stuck with the image of Jonny and the Barbie doll.

Rainie spun around. “Before we leave, would you like a peek at my wedding dress?”

Though her thoughts lingered on other things, she couldn’t ignore Rainie’s excitement. “I’d love to see it.”

Rainie darted away, and as she vanished through the doorway, Neely kept fixating on Jonny. He’d grown into a hunk—a really nice hunk—but what did that have to do with her? No way could she turn her relationship with him into a romance no matter how good-looking or sweet he’d become.

When Rainie returned, Neely slammed the door on her pondering. Seeing her friend’s glinting eyes made her focus on the moment. A saleswoman appeared behind her, carrying the wedding dress.

Neely’s heart stood still. The soft white gown floated in the woman’s arms, organza flanges and tulle swirls of fabric skirt sweeping into a cathedral train. “You’ll be the most beautiful bride in the world.”

Tears flooded Rainie’s eyes, and she wrapped her arm around her friend’s shoulders. “One day I’ll be your matron of honor, and then it will be your turn to be the most beautiful bride in the world.”

The idea warmed her, and she closed her eyes, envisioning her father—healthy and happy—walking her down the aisle. Ahead of her, she gazed at the groom, his eyes tethered to hers, and her heart stopped. She drew in an urgent breath.

“Neely, what’s wrong?”

She gathered her wits. “Nothing. I only hope my dad is still alive to see that day.”

“Oh, sweetie.” Rainie folder her into an embrace, but Neely struggled to clear her mind of the vision she had seen beside the altar. It was Jonny’s spectacular blue eyes that drew her down the aisle.

* * *

Jon peddled faster, his thoughts keeping up with the bike’s speed. Exercise provided therapeutic release to his struggling emotions. He’d always prayed Neely would come back in his life now that age and success were on his side. But he never expected the Lord to answer his far-fetched request.

He gripped the metallic bar, and in a moment eyed his pulse rate. Excellent. He upped the resistance and dug in to the pedals giving the bike another five minutes to deepen the burn. The old motto, no pain no gain, flashed through his thoughts but not nearly as often as Neely’s image. Since he’d talked with her, his emotions roller-coastered through his chest until he wanted to rip up the tracks.

With her back in Ferndale his hope rose again. Maybe her return was part of God’s plan. Knowing Erik was out of the picture cheered him, too. Now he needed to spend time with her so she could know Jon Turner the man, not Jonny Turner the boy who hung out in the shadows and tripped her up with his attempts to watch her every move. He ran errands for her and Rainie just to spend time with Neely.

In his early twenties, he finally understood what about her mesmerized him. First, she was pretty, like sunshine on dew. He cringed at the poetic thought, but that’s what she was like—fresh and open to newness. Even when she put him down, her smile softened the blow, and it felt more playful than serious. And sometimes he had deserved it.

But it wasn’t her good looks that interested him. Lots of girls were pretty. Neely showed a depth of spirit that captured him. He admired her determination and her self-reliance. Most of all her generosity. She’d demonstrated the same trait by leaving her life in Indianapolis to come home to her family who needed her.

Slowing the pedals, he let his muscles cool as his mind reverted back to his plan. Somehow he had to get her back into his life. If she bought a gym membership, he could see her here. If not, maybe the church could be their connection. Or maybe a charitable activity. Even as a teenager, Neely involved herself in more charity events than he could count. The idea sent his pulse surging far beyond what registered on the heart rate monitor. He grinned as he slowed, and then stopped. Now to put his plan to work.

While he showered and slipped back into street clothes, he devised his approach. If he wanted to involve Neely in an activity that connected them, he needed a plan, short range and long range.

Plan A would involve fun times. Time to talk. Since exercising seemed one of her goals, he could begin there. When he stepped from the locker room, he eyed the desk, and Cindy flashed him a grin.

He sauntered over, hoping to look casual. “I have a question.”

“Anything you want, Jon.”

Calling him by his first name tickled him. No one at the center seemed to know who he was, but Cindy always did. “An old friend of mine moved home for a while, and I told her about the fitness center. I wondered if she’d joined.”

She tilted her head. “A friend?”

He shrugged. “She’s my sister’s friend. Neely Andrews. Do you know if she’s a member?”

She studied him a minute as if he’d asked for Neely’s address or phone number.

“I’ve known her for years. I’m just curious.”

Without a comment, she opened a file on her computer. “She joined three days ago. She hit us on a good day. We were running a special.”

“Great.” He stepped back, weighing the ogling grin on her face. “Thanks for the information.”

“Anything else I can do for you?” She closed the file with a click and rested her cheek on her fist. “Anything. Just ask.” She flashed him another smile.

Feeling uneasy, he slipped his hands in his pockets and backed away. “Nothing else today.” He spun around and headed out the door, wondering what was up with Cindy.

His uneasiness vanished when he hit the sidewalk. Neely had a membership, and he hoped he’d run into her there, but he feared she’d come during the day when he was at work. Then he’d have to revert to plan B. As yet, he didn’t have a solid one. But he’d work on it.

* * *

Neely stretched back her shoulders to release the strain. Being away from the gym the past weeks had taken its toll, and though she’d tried running the school track, she didn’t have the commitment that investing money motivated. She’d joined the gym a week ago, and already she saw a difference on her scale.

Her legs burning, she forged ahead, determined to focus on the stair machine. She’d jumped from treadmill to bike to weights and now the steps. She hated them, but her personal trainer in Indianapolis explained the importance, for both toning and for general good health. Having someone guide her worked better than wandering from machine to machine with no method.

Although a trainer would be best, it was expensive. She had to be sensible now that her only income was workers’ compensation, and she wanted no part in depleting her savings. She longed to buy a house of her own.

The exercise accomplished something else important. It cleared her mind. At home with only her dad to talk with, she’d let herself bog down with thoughts of Erik and her history with him. The memories swelled like an abscess. Instead of the fun memories of their earlier time together, she remembered only the bad ones. After she’d started college, the situation struck her hard. She fought the desire to contact him, but as more time passed, when she finally arrived home, she learned through friends that he’d been dating, and she was frustrated that he’d used her with promises of commitment, and then moved on without making an attempt to win her back.

Since the night she gave in to his pressure, she’d never been the same. Instead of beautiful memories of an intimate relationship between husband and wife, her mind was bogged down with shame and a sense of being soiled. She wondered what Jonny would think if he knew. She could only guess he’d be disappointed since he seemed to think she was so great.

Burying the thoughts for now, she studied her surroundings. Since arriving, her eyes kept shifting to the doorway, and the involuntary reaction irked her. She’d wondered if she would see Jonny one late afternoon, but he hadn’t appeared. Disappointment zapped her each time a tall, masculine frame strode through the entrance, and when she focused on the man, she’d see it wasn’t Jonny. Then she spent the next few minutes chastising herself for caring who came through the door. Jonny could be a friend. Nothing more.

She eyed her watch and settled on another fifteen minutes, ten to exercise and five to cool down. She tackled the stair machine, keeping her eyes on the digital screen and holding back a groan with each step.

“You’ve worked up a sweat.”

Her heart skipped. Amazed, she lifted her eyes to Jonny’s. “I like to call it glowing.”

He stood beside the machine, a grin on his face.

“You won’t believe this but I was just thinking of—” She caught herself. Jonny would want to know what she was thinking, and when she told him, he would ask, “Why were you thinking of me?” And she didn’t know why.

“Thinking of what?”

“Winding down.” Saved. She didn’t want to lie, but that was also the truth.

“I was doing laps in the pool.” He gave a head toss in that direction. “I decided to do something different today.” He flexed his shoulders. “Swimming gives different muscles a workout.”

She nodded, her concentration failing.

He stood still, watching her as she slowed her steps for the cool down, but her mind slowed, too, and all she could do is gaze at the new Jonny. His gaunt jaw had strengthened and molded into a square chin, today with the hint of dark bristles. She’d never thought of him as rugged, but that’s what he’d become—strong features, classically handsome, with well-shaped lips, cheeks with the glint of a dimple, short dark wavy hair contrasting with his amazing blue eyes.

She managed to find her voice. “I took your advice and here I am.” She gestured to the workout room. “No personal trainer, but I’m trying to follow the advice from the one I had in Indianapolis.”

“They’re helpful.” He looked thoughtful. “I think you get a free hour of personal training with your membership, don’t you?”

“Yes, but I haven’t scheduled it yet.” She slowed to a stop and stepped off. “I’m finished for today. My muscles can’t take another step.”

“I know a lot about exercise so if you have any questions, just ask. I keep my boys pretty fit back at school.” He dragged the towel from the bar where she’d hung it and daubed her cheeks and forehead before handing it to her.

Her heart skipped, and it irked her. Those unexpected sensations threw her off balance. This was Jonny. She had to remember that. He looked at her as if waiting for a response. “Thanks for the offer and your assistance.” She dangled the towel in front of him. “You were very gallant.”

“I wouldn’t call it ‘gallant.’ ‘Practical’ is better. Glow can burn your eyes.” He sent her a coy look. “If you’re heading for the locker room, I’ll walk with you.”

She gathered her towel and water bottle, took a long swig, and trudged beside him to the locker room. Her legs trembled with each step, and she wasn’t sure if the sensation was her muscles groaning or her unexplained reaction when she was with him.

When she reached the women’s locker room, he kept going but before she was out of earshot, he called over his shoulder. “By the way I have a proposition for you.”

Talk about a heart skip. She dragged air into her lungs. “What kind of proposition?”

He motioned down the hallway. “I’ll wait for you near the door.” And he was gone.

Proposition. The word piqued her interest. While the shower splashed against her skin, easing her aches, nothing eased her mind. She stood in the spray, sorting through her foolish reaction to Jonny. If she’d met him on the street as a stranger, her resistance would have vanished, but their past relationship ruined that.

Her body humming with warmth and the apprehension of hearing Jonny’s proposition, she turned off the water, toweled down and donned her street clothes. She ran a comb through her hair and peered at her unadorned face in the mirror. Usually after exercising she didn’t bother with makeup, and even today, reality reminded her that Jonny had seen her looking worse than she did today, but the more she gazed at her drab face, the more the image of Jeannie Hunt’s turned-up nose filled her mind.

Releasing a sigh, she drew out her makeup bag, brushed blush on her cheeks, dragged the mascara brush over her lashes, and guided lipstick over her mouth. She couldn’t fool him with cosmetics, but at least she felt better. She dropped her towel and damp clothes into her duffle bag, then slipped her makeup and comb into the little zipper compartment and strode toward the exit.

Jonny smiled as she approached, and pushed open the outside door.

“Did you wait long?”

His eyes captured hers. “Seems like a lifetime.”

The comment held a lilt of humor, but she sensed something deeper in his words. She walked beside him, her tight muscles sending messages to her brain that she’d overdone her exercise today, but she didn’t care. She kept pace with Jonny’s long legs, waiting to hear what he had to say.

“Which is your car?”

She pointed to her sport sedan, wondering if he’d forgotten about his proposition.

“Nice. I like the copper color.” He strode beside her in silence.

When they reached her car, she hit the unlock button and gave up wondering. “I thought you had something you wanted to propose.”

He rested his back against the side of her car. “Right. I do.” He tucked his hands into his jacket pocket. “When we were talking about Rainie’s engagement party, I meant to ask if you’d like me to pick you up. No sense in both of us driving.”

Proposition had held more promise than the offer of a ride. “You don’t have a date?”

“Me? No.” His smile faded. “Unless you’ve already made plans.”

“No plans. I thought I’d go alone.”

His face darkened.

Her pulse skipped. “But I don’t need to go alone. I’d be happy to have you pick me up if you don’t mind.”

“I don’t mind at all.” He gazed at her a moment, and then extended his hand.

She eyed it, realizing he was waiting for a shake. She slipped her hand in his, feeling the heat roll up her arm to her chest.

He squeezed her fingers, gave a faint nod and released her hand. “I should have asked the other day, but I know you were dealing with little Jonny the pest, and I didn’t know if—”

“I’m sorry, Jonny. I don’t mean to make such a big deal out of it, but those memories seem to stay in my mind.” Along with the other dark ones she couldn’t get rid of, either.

“It’s okay, Neely. Maybe in time.”

In time. Maybe. She studied his classic good looks, his dark hair with those crystal-blue eyes. Maybe one day she’d even remember to call him Jon.

Chapter Three

“Auntie.”

Joey’s squeal made Neely smile before she climbed from her sedan. She opened her arms as he leaped forward, and held him against her, his legs kicking in delight. The feel of her nephew’s cheek against hers, the tightness of the two-year-old’s arms, warmed her inside and out. “Where’s your mama?”

“In.” He swung his chunky arm toward the house, and she balanced his weight on her hip as she trudged to the screen door and pulled it open. “Ashley?”

Her sister darted into the kitchen, and when she saw Joey, surprise lit her face. “Was he outside?”

“Looks like it.” She gave the toddler a bounce, and set him on the floor.

Ashley knelt in front of him and shook her head. “Joey. You can’t go outside without Mama. You know that.”

He pointed to the heavens. “Birdies.”

She gave Neely a helpless look. “Yes, birdies, but ask Mama to go out with you, okay?”

Joey studied her a moment, as if he wanted to digest her request.

She shifted his chin so he faced her. “Do you want a time out?”

His head swung back and forth like a flag in the wind.

“Then you ask Mama so we can go outside together. Okay?”

“’kay.” His decisive response rang with agreement. Apparently the time out did the trick.

Neely glowed, seeing again the intelligence of her nephew. His speech and abilities seemed ahead of his age. He had his daddy’s smarts and his mama’s loving ways.

Ashley shook her head, her expression wearing the look of defeat as Joey ran into the next room. “I don’t know what I’m going to do with him. He’s already a handful at two.”

Neely chuckled “The terrible twos. But he’s verging on three. Hopefully it won’t be long.” She wrapped her arm around her sister’s shoulder, and guided her through the doorway where Joey had settled on the living room floor with a pile of blocks and miniature cars. “How are you?”

Ashley sank onto the sofa and motioned her to an easy chair. Moisture shone in her eyes and twisted Neely’s heart. Almost two years had passed since Ashley’s husband died for his country in the Middle East, but the pain of losing a soul mate couldn’t be marked by years. The sorrow lasted a lifetime.

Her sister brushed away her tears. “Sorry, it still hits hard once in a while, especially days when Joey’s antics are involved. I wish Adam could have known him, even for a little while.”

Neely rose and settled beside her sister, grasping her hand. “Ash, he knew Joey. He knew him from the photos and all that you shared in your letters.” Her words sounded empty. “You want more than that. I understand. But they’ll meet one day, and what a glorious reunion they’ll have.”

Ashley rested her head on Neely’s shoulder. “In heaven, you mean.”

She could only nod, struggling to swallow the lump in her throat.

“You’re right, sis.” She raised her head followed by a ragged breath. “God gave me part of Adam when he blessed us with a son. I can be grateful for that, and for the time I had with Adam. I have to remember he died doing what he thought was right.” She lowered her head with an easy wag. “Think of the many men and women who died in Afghanistan and left no children behind.”

Her own lack of a family tinged her mind. “You’re right, Ash. God gave you a wonderful gift.” She motioned to Joey, absorbed with his cars and the block structure he’d devised. “And he’s so bright. His hand-eye coordination is amazing.”

Ashley smiled. “He takes after Adam.”

Neely’s purpose for stopping by became trivial in the midst of their conversation. She longed to say so many things that were brilliant and helpful, but she was lost. At this point in her life, she had no husband, no children, no way to deeply relate to her sister’s sorrow.

Ashley’s grieved expression smoothed away. “Let’s talk about you. I haven’t heard from you for a few days.”

The reference to her absence made her feel enveloped in failure. She’d come home to spend time with her father and sister, but for the past few days her mind had been on running into Jonny and jolted by his reference to Erik. “I’ve been trying to get Dad settled. He needs to accept his condition and take better care of himself.” Her excuse sounded feeble. A phone call took minutes.

“If anyone can do it, you can.” Ashley nudged her. “Determination.”

Neely grinned but didn’t bother to respond since she had no rebuttal. Ashley’s point was too true. “Another thing I’ve done is started to exercise, and I’ve joined a gym.” She gave her rounded hip a couple of pats. “I need to get back in shape.” She gazed at her slender sister, aware that grief had taken off her pounds. “You remember my friend Lorraine Turner. Her brother Jonny told me about a new place called Tone and Trim Fitness Center. Remember him? He was such a pest?”