Bachelor Father

“Things will get better,” she predicted. “You just have to patient.” She arched her back, again placing a hand at the base of her spine. “I wonder how much longer it’ll be before we can go in? I could use a chair about now.”

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

She smiled weakly and nodded. “I’m just tired.” She put a hand on her stomach. “And it doesn’t help that your nephew has decided today is the day to practice his soccer kicks.”

“Why don’t you go home?”

She shook her head. “Can’t. I promised Megan I’d be here when she woke up.”

“She’s probably not going to know who is and who isn’t here tonight,” he noted.

Lori glanced apprehensively at the closed door. “I am tired,” she admitted.

“Then do me a favor and leave. On top of all of this I don’t need the wrath of my brother on me. He’s not happy that I made him go to the boat show in the first place, and if he comes home and finds you’ve run yourself ragged while he’s been gone, he’s going to be all over me.”

“It’s a good thing he is there,” she remarked. “Your grandfather can’t really handle a show on his own anymore.”

“I called Bill Grainger and he’s going to fly out first thing in the morning to help in any way he can,” Adam told her.

“That’ll be good.” She placed a hand on his arm. “I’m sorry you had to leave in the middle of the show. I know how excited you were about the Seababy.”

He shrugged. “Things happen.”

Although Adam often oversaw construction at Novak Boats, his first love was design. It was why he was the company’s best spokesperson. He knew every inch on each custom-designed yacht that came out of the factory. Boat shows were the perfect place for him to showcase the cutting-edge technology that had earned him numerous industry awards. This year it was the Seababy, a midsize motor yacht, that was his pride and joy and already the buzz in the boating world.

But then Novak Boats often was at the center of attention in the industry. What his grandfather had founded as a small family business to build pontoons for local lakes had evolved into an internationally known yacht manufacturer creating pleasure cruise boats easily handled at sea. From a single employee to nearly one hundred and fifty, the company had earned its place in the boating world with a reputation envied by many.

Building boats was a passion Adam had discovered at an early age. While some kids went to nursery school, Adam had tagged along with his father to the factory where his grandfather had put him to work fetching tools. He’d learned the art of boat building at the knee of a master, and by the time he went off to college to earn his engineering degree, he knew every aspect of the business, including how to represent Novak Boats at the various shows across the country.

When the door to Megan’s room opened and a lab technician came out carrying a tray of medical supplies, Adam asked, “Is everything okay?”

The woman nodded. “You’ll be able to go in in a few minutes. Her nurse is just finishing up in there.”

“Is she asking for me?” Lori wanted to know.

“Oh, yes. I think she must have said ‘I want my mommy’ at least five times.”

Lori’s startled glance caught Adam’s before she said to the tech, “I’m her aunt. Her mother died last fall.”

The tech grimaced. “Oooh. I’m sorry. I thought…”

Lori shook her head. “It’s okay.”

“It’s probably the medication confusing her,” the tech said with an apologetic shrug, then disappeared down the hall.

The door opened again and this time a nurse stepped out. “You can come in now.”

Adam introduced himself and asked, “How is she?”

“She’s resting comfortably. She was having quite a bit of pain so I gave her something to help her sleep,” the nurse explained. “Mr. Novak, if you’d like to spend the night, we can put a cot for you in her room.”

Lori looked at Adam. “One of us should probably stay in case she wakes up.”

He nodded. “I’ll stay. You go home and get a good night’s sleep.”

“What if she asks for Christie again?”

“I doubt she will.” He dismissed her concern with a shake of his head. “But if she does, I’ll clear things up.” As he watched his sister-in-law walk away, he realized it was a heck of a time for him to hope to improve communications with his daughter. But he would. Somehow. Someway.

CHAPTER TWO

WHAT THE NURSE CALLED a bed was actually a padded vinyl chair that collapsed in the middle so that it resembled a cot. There were times when being six foot three had its advantages. This was not one of them. As Adam tried to stretch out on the makeshift bed, his feet dangled over one end. After a period of tossing and turning in search of a comfortable position, he put the chair back into its original position. It wouldn’t be the first time he would have to sleep sitting upright.

Not that he expected to sleep. He needed darkness and silence. Megan’s hospital room had neither. If there wasn’t some piece of equipment blinking, there was an electronic machine beeping. Then there were the frequent visits by various medical staff.

And, of course, there was Megan herself. She was not a quiet sleeper. Although she wasn’t tossing and turning, she made little sounds that were a cross between a groan and a hiccup. The first time he heard one he thought that she was in distress. He’d jumped up from the chair and called for the nurse who had assured him Megan was not in any danger.

To his surprise he finally was able to get a couple of hours of sleep. When he awoke he discovered someone had pulled the drape around Megan’s bed, separating him from his daughter. Although he couldn’t see the two people on the other side, he could hear them.

“It hurts,” Megan cried.

“I know it does, dear. I’m going to give you some medicine to help make you feel better.”

When the only sound to be heard was Megan’s whimpering, Adam called out, “Is everything all right?”

“Everything’s fine, Mr. Novak,” a woman’s voice answered from the other side of the curtain. “We’re just taking care of some business.”

Then he heard Megan say in a voice that was slightly hoarse, “Is Adam here?”

Adam. Being in the hospital hadn’t suddenly made his daughter want to call him Dad. He wondered if she would ever regard him as her father.

“If you’re referring to your dad, yes, he is here,” Adam heard the nurse say. “He’s been here all night actually, and as soon as I’m finished we’ll open the curtain and you can see him.”

“I’d rather see my mommy. Can you get her for me?”

Adam frowned. It had been almost six months since Christie had drowned. Megan knew her mother had died and gone to heaven, so why was she asking for her now?

The nurse didn’t answer her question about her mother but went on to advise Megan to be very careful and lie still because it was important that she not disturb the bandages on her tummy.

Adam could see nothing but darkness through the sliver of an opening in the window blind. He glanced at his watch. It was five-fifteen. He had a crick in his neck, his clothes were wrinkled and he was in desperate need of a cup of coffee. Thinking he might take a break and find a coffee machine, he was about to ask the nurse how long she’d be with Megan when the drape swung open.

“How is she?” he asked in a low voice.

“She’s still pretty sleepy, but she’s doing much better, aren’t you, Megan?” the nurse said, walking over to write some numbers on a white board hanging on the wall.

Adam moved closer to the bed. Although Megan still looked tiny and frail, her face wasn’t as pasty as it had been when he’d first seen her. The medical equipment surrounding her reminded him, however, that she was one very sick little girl.

“How do you feel?” he asked her, wishing he could do something to make her more comfortable. She reminded him of how she’d looked the first time he’d seen her. It had been in the attorney’s office and she’d stood perfectly still next to the lawyer, as if she were afraid to move a muscle for fear of something horrible happening to her.

“It still hurts,” she replied in a voice that begged for his sympathy. “Lori told me the operation would make me feel better.”

The nurse came back to her bedside. “It doesn’t hurt as badly today as it did yesterday, does it?”

“No.” The response was barely audible.

“Each day it will hurt a little less,” the nurse told her. “Once your tummy heals you’re going to feel as good as new. Now I’m going to leave you so you can get some more sleep.” She checked the IV unit next to the bed, then said, “If you need anything, you know what to do, right?”

“I push the button,” Megan said weakly.

“That’s right.” On her way out, the nurse said to Adam, “I’ll just be down the hall if you need me.”

He nodded. “Is there someplace where I can get a cup of coffee?”

“There’s a lounge near the elevators with vending machines, but at this time of night, the coffee’s pretty strong. You might want to go across the street. There’s a small diner that’s open twenty-four hours.”

Adam thanked her then took the place she’d vacated next to the bed.

Megan glanced at him through half-closed eyes. “Where’s Lori?”

“She’s at home.”

“She said she was going to stay,” Megan said in a voice that was on the verge of tears.

“She wanted to, but she was tired so she went home to get some sleep. She’ll be back in the morning. I’m here if you need anything.” He noticed a cup with a straw in it on the tray table next to her bed. “Would you like a sip of water?”

She shook her head. “Did you come home on an airplane?”

“Yes.”

“Didn’t you like the boat show?”

“Yes, I did, but I wanted to be here with you.” It was the truth. The moment Lori had called with the news that she’d taken Megan to the hospital his first thought was to get home as quickly as possible so he could be with her.

She scrunched up her face. “I feel funny.”

“Funny how?” he wanted to know.

“Like my head’s fuzzy,” she murmured.

“That’s from the medicine. The more you sleep, the less fuzzy you’ll feel.”

“But I don’t want to go to sleep,” she whined. “I want to find her.”

He leaned closer to her. “Who do you want to find?”

“Mommy. She’s here in the hospital, you know. I saw her. When the man was pushing me in my bed.” Megan yawned, her eyelids fluttering as she fought to stay awake.

So that was the reason for her confusion. While she’d been sedated she had seen someone who resembled Christie and mistaken her for her mother. Adam knew he needed to correct her. He couldn’t let her go on believing that she’d really seen her mother, yet he wondered if she would even remember such a conversation tomorrow morning? What she needed was sleep. There would be plenty of time to talk about what she did or didn’t see tomorrow.

“Shhh. Don’t talk now,” he told her. “You need to rest.”

Megan’s voice trembled as she said, “I wish she’d take me home with her.”

Adam felt as if two hands reached right into his chest and squeezed his heart. “You’ll get to go home when you’re feeling better,” he said gently. He took her small hand in his and brought it to his lips, kissing the knuckles ever so gently.

“Will Mommy be there?” The question came out on a pathetic little whimper, then before Adam could answer, she had closed her eyes and succumbed to sleep.

It was obvious Megan was still not over the death of her mother. He supposed it shouldn’t have surprised him. She was so young and innocent—too young to have to cope with the loss of a parent. Now the trauma of surgery had been added to her already-confused emotional state. He could only hope that once she recovered from the effects of the anesthetics, she wouldn’t be asking about her mother.

As he watched her sleep, he stared at her face, trying to see why his relatives thought she looked like him. All he saw was a younger version of Christie. With her blond hair, blue eyes and small rounded nose, Megan definitely looked more like an Anderson than a Novak. Lori insisted that she had his smile, but he was reserving an opinion on that one until the space where her tooth was missing had been filled.

His brother, Greg, had pointed out that Megan had several of Adam’s mannerisms, like biting down on her lower lip when she concentrated and wiggling her feet while she slept. He glanced to the end of the bed, knowing that if he watched it long enough, he’d see the blanket twitch. After only a few seconds it did wiggle and he smiled.

Adam thought it was strange that she should have any of his traits considering they’d spent so many years apart. Again he looked at her face, so peaceful in slumber. She had so much potential, so many possibilities ahead of her. From the day he’d first seen her he’d promised himself that he would make up for the years he’d missed in her young life.

And he would. He was going to do his best to protect her from getting hurt again. And he would spend more time with her. Ever since she’d come to live with him he’d been working like a fiend getting ready for the debut of the newest Novak yacht. He’d had little free time to do the fun things that fathers and daughters were supposed to do. But that was going to change. As the sun’s first morning rays slowly appeared through the slits in the window blinds, he pulled out his Palm Pilot to see where he could schedule her in.

AFTER SPENDING THE NIGHT in a chair, Adam needed a shower and a change of clothes. While his sister-in-law kept his daughter company, he took his laptop and went home where he was tempted to grab a few hours of sleep, but chose instead to call his brother in Miami to get a report on the boat show and to take care of several other business matters.

It was after noon when he returned to the hospital. Before going up to see Megan, he stopped at the gift shop in the lobby and bought a bouquet of balloons and a small white bear that had Get Well Soon embroidered inside a pink heart on its chest.

When he walked into Megan’s room, he saw Lori was sitting next to the bed reading her a story. The blinds were open, allowing a stream of sunshine in and Megan’s bed had been raised so that she was no longer lying flat on her back.

“Oooh, what pretty balloons,” Lori cooed when she saw what was in Adam’s hands. “What do you think, Megan?”

“Are they for me?” she asked, a gleam of interest in her eyes.

“They certainly are.” Adam set the bear down next to her on the bed. “Along with this guy, they’re supposed to help you feel better,” he told her, giving her a smile.

As he glanced around for a place to put the balloons, Lori said, “You can probably tie them to the foot rail. That way Megan can see them even if the curtain is drawn around her bed.” She reached for the bear and moved it closer to her niece, tucking it under the covers so that it was beside her. “Isn’t he soft?”

Megan nodded, her small hand closing around the bear and bringing it to her face. “He’s very soft. Thank you,” she said politely.

“You’re welcome. How are you feeling?” he asked, taking the chair on the opposite side of the bed from Lori.

“Okay,” she answered without much enthusiasm.

“Dr. Lindgren was here earlier and said that she should start feeling much better once she’s able to eat,” Lori told him. “She’s going to try some Jell-O for lunch.”

“Yes, I heard. That’s good news,” Adam said.

“And the other good news is that while you were gone, she got up and went to the bathroom,” Lori told him.

“That has to be a good sign,” Adam acknowledged.

“I didn’t like doing my business in that pan,” Megan said with the frankness of a child. She told him several other things she didn’t like about being in the hospital before asking him the one question he didn’t want to hear. “Have you seen Mommy today?”

Lori’s eyes met his and she shrugged helplessly. He sat down in the chair next to the bed and said, “Megan, you know we can’t see her. She’s in heaven.”

“Not anymore she isn’t. She came back,” Megan said in a small voice. “Will you find her for me?”

He leaned closer to her. “I can’t do that because she’s not here.”

She licked her lips with her tongue before saying, “But I saw her yesterday when I was getting a ride in my bed.”

“You mean you saw someone who looked like her,” he corrected her.

“Uh-uh. I saw her,” she told him.

Adam reached for her hand and clasped it within his. “We’ve talked about this before, Megan. From time to time you’re going to see women with blond hair and blue eyes who remind you of your mother. That’s only natural. You loved her very much and you miss her.”

“But this lady was my mommy,” she insisted.

“No, she wasn’t,” he said gently, but firmly.

She pulled her hand away. “I knew you wouldn’t believe me.” It was an accusation accompanied by a look that reminded Adam of all that was wrong in their relationship.

“It’s not that I don’t believe you. I think you’re confused because you saw someone who looks like your mother,” he said.

“It was her,” she stated as emphatically as she could considering she had very little strength. “She smiled at me and she blew me a kiss. Mommy always did this when she said goodbye.” She raised two fingers to her lips, then held them up in the air as if sending a kiss his way.

“Lots of people blow kisses, Megan.”

“It was my mommy,” she stated. Her gaze shot to Lori. “You believe me, right?”

Lori sighed. “Oh, sweetie, it’s not a question of believing you. I’m sure the woman you saw looked a lot like your mom….”

Realizing neither of them thought she’d seen her mother, Megan couldn’t stop her lip from quivering and the tears from falling. Pain tightened Adam’s chest.

“It’s only natural that you’d be thinking about her while you’re here in the hospital,” he said. “She used to comfort you when you were sick, remember?”

Megan nodded. “Sometimes she’d climb into bed with me to keep me warm.” She hiccupped as she struggled not to sob. “She could make my tummyaches go away without having to have an operation.”

“I know.” He brushed a stray blond hair away from her cheek. “Unfortunately your mommy’s not here. She’s in heaven.”

“Maybe she came back.”

The hope in her eyes had the same effect on him as a punch in the stomach. “People don’t come back from heaven, Megan. Once you go there, you stay there forever.”

“But you came back,” she told him.

Adam exchanged glances with Lori before saying, “No, I didn’t. I was never in heaven.”

“Mommy said you were.”

Again he caught Lori’s glance and it was filled with empathy.

“Well, your mommy made a mistake. She only thought I’d gone to heaven,” he explained, trying not to feel frustrated with something over which he’d had no control.

“Maybe you made a mistake and Mommy didn’t really go to heaven, either,” she argued.

His anger with Christie for keeping Megan’s existence from him surfaced. He could only imagine how different things would be this very moment if instead of disappearing from his life, Christie had told him she was pregnant with his child.

“Other people believe your mommy’s in heaven, too,” Lori said. “Even your uncle Tom knows she’s there.”

“Maybe he made a mistake, too,” Megan countered innocently.

Adam could see that he was accomplishing nothing by trying to convince her she hadn’t seen her mother. If there was one thing he’d learned in the short time he’d known his daughter it was that once she had her mind made up about something, she wasn’t about to change it. He could see this was one of those times.

“Tell me why you think she’s here in the hospital, Megan,” he said patiently.

“When I saw her she told me she works here. She rocks the babies,” she answered.

“She told you that?” he asked, wondering if there actually was an employee who rocked babies.

“Yes. In the child-care center.”

He looked at Lori who said, “It’s on the first floor.”

He thought for a long moment before getting to his feet. “I’ll tell you what. I’ll go downstairs and look for this woman so we can find out what her name is.”

“I know what her name is. She’s my mommy.” Megan’s voice sounded weary, reminding Adam that she had a long recovery ahead of her.

Lori raised a finger to her lips. “Shh. Don’t talk, just rest. Let your dad go and see if he can find her.”

Adam glanced down at his daughter. “I’ll be back as soon as I’ve talked to her, okay?”

Megan’s response was a satisfied grin. On any other occasion it would have made him happy. Today it only made him anxious.

Lori looked at Adam. “I’ll walk with you to the elevators.” As soon as they were in the hallway she said, “I’m worried about her, Adam. She really does believe that she saw Christie.”

“I know. Last night I thought it was simply the medication, but she’s lucid today and she’s still asking for her,” he said as they walked toward the bank of elevators at the end of the corridor.

“She thinks people can come back from heaven,” Lori said on a sigh.

“Yes, and we know why.” He found it difficult to hold back his frustration with Megan’s mother. “All of this could have been avoided if Christie had simply allowed me to be Megan’s father from day one.” Impatiently he raked a hand through his hair. “I still don’t know why she never told me she was pregnant.”

“You said it was a one-night stand, Adam,” she reminded him, as if that explained Christie’s behavior.

“That didn’t give her the right to keep Megan’s existence from me,” he argued. “I may not have been the most mature guy seven years ago, but I wouldn’t have turned my back on my own daughter.”

“Of course you wouldn’t,” his sister-in-law said in a tone definitely meant to appease him.

Lori had been married to his brother long enough to know that he had strong family values. She’d also seen enough women come and go in his life to know that making a commitment to one wasn’t a priority in his life. Although she rarely commented on his personal relationships, he knew that she hoped that marriage and a family would be in his future. One of the reasons they got along as well as they did was because they had an unspoken agreement between them. He didn’t interfere in his brother’s marriage and she respected his privacy when it came to his love life. Now that he had Megan, he could see she was finding it difficult to honor her end of the agreement.

They’d reached the elevators and stood facing each other. “It does no good to wonder what might have been,” Lori told him. “We need to get this resolved and soon. Megan can’t go on thinking her mother’s come back from the dead.”

Adam pressed the call button. “It will be resolved. If this woman she’s mistaken for Christie works in the child-care center, I’ll find her. Will you stay with Megan until I get back?”

“Of course. I do have a doctor appointment later this afternoon, though.”

He nodded. “This shouldn’t take long.”

An elevator car arrived and he stepped inside. As the doors slid shut, he tried not to think about how fragile and vulnerable Megan had looked as she’d asked about her mother. He’d wanted to take her in his arms and tell her that nothing would ever harm her as long as he was around.

He hadn’t. And not just because of the hospital equipment connected to her. She had given him no reason to believe that she wanted him to be her father. If anything, she’d shown him in a hundred different ways that she didn’t regard him as her parent.

She wanted a mother, not a father. It’s why she preferred to be with Lori rather than with him. He wondered if it also wasn’t the reason why she wanted so badly to believe that she’d seen Christie in the hospital.

He tried not to feel as if he’d flunked another fatherhood test, but after six weeks of being a parent, he’d made very little progress in earning her trust and love. That had to change. How it would happen, he wasn’t sure, but he knew it had to start with finding the baby rocker.