Riley's Baby Boy

With the windows open Brenna heard night sounds she’d forgotten. She was used to lights and sirens blaring, and horns honking and trucks rumbling even at night. She wasn’t used to the silence any more, the call of the owls, the rustling of branches, the sometimes utter stillness. Scents of sage and pine drifted in the window as she heard Riley moving about in his room, heard the creak of his bed, the sound of the light switching on and off. Was he as restless as she was?

Maybe a bowl of cereal would help. That is, if Riley had cereal. She could always just have a glass of milk. The small crib on wheels they’d bought was set up beside the bed now. A mobile dangled on one side. She stood by it, looking down at her sleeping son. He was practically her whole world. Overnight she’d gone from a self-absorbed career woman to a mom. Derek had changed everything about her life.

But the career woman in her still had a to-do list. She’d have to check in with her store manager tomorrow, then with her fabric supplier, not to mention her PR consultant.

Time to get that cereal, she decided, stopping the racing thoughts.

Rubbing her hand in a full circle over Derek’s back, she finally left him and went to the kitchen.

After opening two of the upper cupboards, she found what she was looking for and she had to smile. This was the same kind of cereal Riley liked in high school—sweet and sticky. Old times were the best times? Maybe that was true for her and Riley.

She was pouring cereal into a bowl when he entered the kitchen. She looked up and her breath practically stopped. He was shirtless and the waist button of his jeans was unsnapped. She couldn’t seem to pull her gaze from all that black hair running a route down his chest.

“Want some company?” he asked.

“Can’t sleep, either?” she might as well just ask.

“My head’s too full of everything that’s going on, about Derek and things I should do for him.”

“And about me being under your roof? My parents not liking that idea one little bit?”

When he approached her and stopped right beside her, she wished she’d stayed in her room. He was all man, all temptation, all Riley, and he was close enough to touch.

“Having you under my roof is keeping me awake, too. Add that to your list.” Desire was in his eyes and she could feel an answering response to it in her belly. So he wouldn’t see it, she turned away, went to the refrigerator and pulled out the milk.

“You’re running, Brenna.”

“I’m not running. I’m turning away from what shouldn’t happen. I’m getting a midnight snack. Do you want one or not?” She knew she was being defensive and that she wasn’t handling the attraction between them very well. But she had to put some kind of barrier between them or they wouldn’t only tumble into bed, they’d tumble into heartache.

He caught her arm and she stopped moving. Gazing up into his so-blue eyes, she felt her resistance melting away, and that wasn’t good.

“Exactly how long are you going to stay in Miners Bluff?”

So that’s what was bothering him. “A month. I have to get back to be ready for my fall show.”

He looked somewhat relieved as if he’d expected her to say she’d be leaving at the end of the week.

She asked a question that had been in her mind all afternoon. “When are you going to tell your dad and the rest of your family about Derek?”

“I have to figure out the best way to do it.”

“Best way?”

“My father’s sober now. He has been for the past five years. I don’t want to do anything that’s going to rock that boat.”

“My father never meant to destroy your dad’s life. You’ve got to know that.”

He appeared to measure his words carefully as he said, “No, I don’t know that. I know your father was a ruthless businessman. All he cared about was expanding his department store. When my dad couldn’t pay rent to him, your father took advantage of that. He stepped right in, and kicked him out.”

“It was a business decision!”

Now Riley’s composure cracked a little as bitterness seeped out. “Maybe he should have looked behind the business of it. My dad was already sinking financially and that made sure he sank. Then my mom didn’t stick around because she was tired of four kids pulling on her, tired of hardly making ends meet, tired of being with a man who couldn’t get back on his feet. After she left, Jack Daniels became Dad’s best friend. Sometimes, I swear, he didn’t even know we were around. If I hadn’t worked at the grocery store and gotten day-old bread and expired meat, I’m not sure what would have happened.”

Brenna had never known that things were that bad for the O’Rourkes. Oh, yes, she’d known her father had pushed Liam O’Rourke out of the restaurant so he could expand his department store. But she’d never known the rest.

“Riley, I’m sorry. I never knew. Even in high school, you never said.”

“Back then, I was afraid of your opinion. I was afraid of anyone’s opinion. The O’Rourkes stood on their own. They made do. They got by. Now we’re all on our feet, even Dad. I don’t want to do anything that might make him pick up that bottle again.”

Maybe so. But Riley was forgetting something. “We went to my father’s department store together and stopped for gas. Tomorrow we’re going to the pediatrician. You know Miners Bluff. If your dad doesn’t hear it from you, he’s going to hear it from someone else very soon.”

Riley’s gaze told her he’d already thought of that, and he was worried about it.

Brenna stepped back to the cupboard and took out another cereal bowl, but Riley shook his head.

“Never mind. I think I’m going to go outside on the porch for a bit. Enjoy your snack.”

She wanted to tell him he needed a shirt. She wanted to tell him the temperature had dipped like it always did at night here. But she didn’t get the chance to tell him anything because he left the kitchen and went out the front door.

Riley still didn’t want her pity. He still had his pride. He’d rather be cold than sit in the kitchen with her.

That thought tightened her throat.

Chapter Three

On Saturday morning Derek suckled as Brenna sat in the wooden rocker in her room. She rocked back and forth before the sun was up, wondering if there was any new mother in the world who wasn’t sleep deprived. Not that she minded. She knew these moments with her child in her arms were precious because he was already growing fast. After all, she’d read all the baby books. Before long he’d be rolling over, sitting up, standing, crawling. She didn’t want to think about all of that. She just wanted to enjoy Derek in her arms.

However, rocking couldn’t prevent her from thinking about yesterday and the appointment with the pediatrician. She’d held Derek while the doctor swabbed the inside of his cheek and hers. Then she’d left the room with her son, knowing Riley was having his cheek swabbed, too.

She hoped just having the DNA test done would convince Riley he could trust her. Whenever they were in the same room, they didn’t seem to know how to act!

After the appointment she’d taken Derek to visit with her mom for a few hours but her father had been at the store. She wanted to find her way somehow to a new father-daughter relationship better than the one she’d had since she’d left home.

Sounds suddenly broke the early morning quiet. Riley was up and about. Why? It was only 5:00 a.m. She heard the shower running and did her best not to imagine him under it. Then she heard drawers opening and closing. She’d been hoping to catch a few more hours of sleep. Instead, however, after she burped Derek and laid him back in his crib, she belted a robe tightly around her, opened her door wider and stepped out into the hall where shadows were thick and dark.

When Riley’s door opened, he emerged, startling her. He took one look at her in her robe and frowned. “Problem?”

“No problem,” she was quick to assure him. “I was feeding Derek and I heard you. What are you doing up?”

“Clay’s coming by to pick up some gear. He’s taking over my tour this morning so I can stay with you.”

“There’s no need for you to do that. I’m fine here with Derek on my own.”

Riley took a step closer to her, maybe to see her better in the dim light that was glowing from his room into the hall. “This house is in the middle of nowhere. That’s fine for me. But for you and the baby, I’m not so sure. I was supposed to take a group on a trail ride this morning and a tour out to Feather Peak tomorrow. If I do that, I’ll be out of cell phone contact.”

“You can’t hover, Riley.” She gave him a dark look and he knew exactly what that meant. Her parents had hovered all her life and she hadn’t liked it one bit. It was one of the reasons she’d left.

His frown turned into a scowl. He looked as sexy as ever, dressed in a T-shirt and jeans, all muscles and fitness and virility. So much for not thinking about the night they’d spent together. It would be so easy to fall for him all over again, and she couldn’t let that happen. She didn’t want her heart broken. She knew exactly how Riley felt about marriage and couldn’t forget the heartbreak from when she’d left before.

He was looking at her as if he’d like to unbelt her robe. He was looking at her with protective instincts that made her feel safe, yet seemed to threaten her at the same time. She didn’t want to think about him as safe because nothing about Riley O’Rourke was secure.

Her independence was a cloak she wore easily and she wrapped it around herself now and stood up to him. “I’m a capable woman, Riley. I know I have a new baby, and who knows what can happen? But my parents are only a short drive away if I need anybody. You can’t stop your life because of me and Derek. I wouldn’t want you to.”

Eyeing her warily, maybe not sure she meant what she was saying, he took another step closer. Riley within kissing or touching distance was not a good thing. But she didn’t back away.

“Did you get much sleep?” he asked, suddenly changing the subject.

“Some,” she answered cautiously.

“You know, if you’d let me give Derek a bottle you could get more sleep.”

“And you’d get less.”

“Fifty-fifty. Isn’t that what parenting is about?”

She wasn’t sure how to answer that one. Yes, she wanted her son to know his father. But they had different lives, lived in different places, and she didn’t know how they were going to settle that.

“I’ll start using a bottle with Derek some of the time. If you want to feed him, you can.”

“I’d like that.” His voice had gone all low and husky and she heard the emotion in it, something Riley usually hid. Was it the idea of taking care of his son? Experiences he’d had that had shown him how precious life could be?

As quickly as he’d taken a step toward her, he took a step back.

“All right,” he said, going back to their earlier conversation. “I’ll call Clay and tell him I’m taking out the tours. But today I’ll be back by 1:00. I need to call my family and let the fallout begin.”

She’d watched him pace at times yesterday, pick up his phone and then put it down. He had a lot more family than she did, so there would be many more judgments to combat. No wonder he’d waited until he knew what he wanted to say … and do.

“I’ll be here,” she said softly. “While Derek sleeps, I need to work.”

“Work as in—”

“New sketches, new designs, phone calls. I have good people working for me, but they still need to consult with me.”

He nodded as if he understood. Then as if he couldn’t help himself, he reached out and touched her cheek. “Go back to bed. You have blue smudges under your eyes.”

Abruptly he turned away and headed for the kitchen.

As Brenna returned to her room, she knew she was probably going to have blue smudges for the next few months. Who did Riley see when he looked at her? The girl he’d known? Or the woman she’d become?

It really didn’t matter … because nothing had changed between them. On the other hand, everything had.

Riley was supposed to meet the tourists he’d be leading on a trail ride at the Rocky D ranch. Zack Decker guided a few horses into the corral to choose from—a pretty gray-spotted appaloosa, a bay, a chestnut, and Riley’s favorite, Silver Star, a beautiful pewter-gray gelding who was as reliable as he was durable. He was Riley’s pick every time.

Zack grinned at him as Riley strode up to the horse and gave him his hand to smell.

Silver whinnied a greeting.

Riley gave him a “hey, boy,” and stroked his neck.

“What’s on for this morning?” Zack asked.

“Three businessmen who decided to take a vacation together and come West.”

“Do you think they know how to ride?” Zack asked with wry sarcasm.

“They say they’ve had some experience. But trail riding in the foothills of Moonshadow Mountain is a heck of a lot different than riding on groomed lanes outside a big city. So we’ll see.”

“Do you think you’ll be able to ride out and be back by lunch?”

“It’ll be tight, but we should do okay. I really don’t want it to go long.”

As Zack walked around Silver and checked the lead on another horse’s nose, he said, “You usually don’t care if the trail ride goes all day.”

“The men are driving to Flagstaff and have a meeting about hiking down the Grand Canyon.”

“What’s the but?” Zack asked bluntly.

Zack never beat around the bush. As a movie producer and director as well as co-manager of the Rocky D with his wife Jenny, he could put his thumb right on the pertinent point even when you didn’t want him to. Riley knew Brenna’s presence in town wouldn’t be quiet forever. He was going to put in that call to his father when he got back and meet with him later today.

But for the meantime there would be no harm in telling Zack because he’d become more than a former classmate—he’d become a loyal friend.

“I had a surprise the other day.”

“Good surprise or bad surprise?” Zack asked, propping a foot on the bottom rung of the fence, tilting his Stetson back with his other hand.

“Brenna McDougall returned to Miners Bluff and ended up on my doorstep.”

“I heard you were talking at the reunion and left together. Family feud over?”

“Hell, no. But … I didn’t tell you why she came back.”

“If she was on your doorstep, then it was to see you.”

“Did you take a class in deductive theory?”

“Get on with it, O’Rourke. You want to tell me something. You know you do. You’re just having trouble doing it.”

Riley sighed, gazed off into the distance where pines and aspen, larch and laurel gave the Rocky D its special charm. “Have you ever done anything foolish, Zack? So foolish it changed the rest of your life?”

“Not speaking to my father for all those years was foolish. Not convincing Jenny to go with me out of high school was foolish. Holding grudges for too long without knowing the real reason behind them was foolish. So, yeah, I’ve done foolish things.” Zack had reconciled with his father Silas and had married Jenny less than a year ago. He sure seemed happy.

But Riley didn’t believe in marriage. He’d been too hurt by his parents. He didn’t believe two people could make promises that would last forever. His mother couldn’t stand the heat and she’d gotten out of the kitchen. His mother’s abandonment of her family had driven his dad to the bottle. Liam O’Rourke had never gotten over loving his wife and not being loved in return. Those difficult years had had a profound effect on Riley.

And if Brenna hadn’t been able to stand by Riley during the tough times, had she ever really loved him?

He had to admit when he saw Zack and Jenny together, they looked at each other as if they were each other’s worlds. He realized the same was true for Clay Sullivan and his wife, Celeste, who had also reunited after the reunion, as well as Mikala Conti and Dawson Barrett who had been classmates and were now expecting a baby. But besides his own parents’ divorce and that of his brother Patrick, he’d seen his sister lose a husband she’d loved.

The bottom-line truth was all of that plus Riley’s tours of service had affected him deeply. He didn’t want to be tied down. He wanted room to roam and that prevented romantic entanglements from going any further. Still …

Whenever he thought of Derek, he thought about a life built around his son. He just couldn’t envision it yet.

“Brenna knocked on my door and when I opened it she was holding my baby,” he blurted out.

Zack didn’t react at first. Then he asked with that perception Riley didn’t know if he admired or hated, “This happened the night of the reunion?”

“Yeah.”

“What are you going to do about it?”

“I’m a dad. I’m going to act like a dad.”

“She has her picture in magazines, doesn’t she? Jenna told me she’s a well-known bridal gown designer. Mikala wore one of her gowns for her wedding.”

“Seriously?”

“Dawson told her whatever she wanted and that’s what she wanted. Small wedding, really nice gown. Not that I noticed much, with Jenny in a dress Brenna designed, too.”

“Yeah, she’s famous—in New York, anyway, maybe in L.A. We haven’t gotten into it.”

“Well, you’d better. I imagine her life is as busy as life could get.” Zack shook his head. “How did you ever get involved with her again? Your families will never see eye-to-eye.”

“Not even over a grandson?”

After a moment of letting that question sit, Zack asked, “So, what’s his name?”

“His name’s Derek.”

“Don’t think Derek is going to solve all your problems. Especially not the ones between you and Brenna.”

“How do you know we have problems?”

“You hooked up the night of the reunion. She went back to New York and you were here. Did you have contact with her afterward?”

“No,” Riley said tersely.

“Like I said, problems. What are you going to do?”

“Let it play out a little. Then I have to decide if I’m ready to make any changes. Derek is important to me, Zack. More important than anything ever has been.”

“Then you’ll figure it out.”

The sound of a Suburban’s engine signaled the arrival of Riley’s businessmen. This morning he was going to try to forget about Brenna and Derek. He was going to focus on the trail and his clients and appreciating everything this beautiful country had to offer.

Riley turned into the lane leading to his house. A quarter of a mile and a curve later he saw the truck parked in his driveway and he stomped on the accelerator, leaving a rooster tail of gravel behind him. His father’s truck. His dad was in his house with Brenna and the baby. He could only imagine what might be going on in there.

Leaving his trail gear exactly where it was, not even grabbing his hat, he climbed out of the vehicle, slammed the door and rushed up the front walk. After he pushed open the door and stepped inside … he froze.

Brenna was hovering by the sofa, looking worried. His father was sitting on the couch, holding Derek carefully in the crook of his arm. He’d been running his finger over his grandson’s chin when Riley opened the door.

Now he stopped and turned toward his son. “Just when were you going to tell me about this?” he demanded.

Riley hated the fact that this had happened to Brenna, that she’d had to deal with his dad all on her own. He just wished he knew what she’d said and how she’d explained it all. He just wished he’d picked up the phone yesterday.

Brenna looked upset, maybe a little tense, but not angry. Another woman in this spot might have been furious this had happened to her.

Score another point for Brenna.

“Brenna just arrived a few days ago,” Riley said, knowing that was a lame explanation. He felt grimy, as if he’d ridden through a dust bowl—and he practically had.

His father shifted Derek a little, still looking down at him. Then he turned his attention to Riley again. “Brenna told me the two of you told her parents and then you went to the doc to get a DNA test yesterday.”

Riley’s gaze shot to hers.

She gave a little shrug.

“You don’t think you’re the dad?” Liam asked, now staring straight at him.

Riley stroked his hand down over his face. “This is private business between me and Brenna.”

His father studied him. “Maybe. Maybe not. Tell me when you were planning to notify me I had a grandson.”

“Today, Pop. I was going to call you when I got back from a trail ride this morning.”

Liam looked at Riley for a long moment and then nodded. “You don’t lie. I know that. I just feel a little … out of the loop. Do your brothers and sister know?”

“They will now,” Riley muttered.

“Mr. O’Rourke, can I get you something to drink?” Brenna asked. “I have iced tea, soda—”

Again Liam looked at Riley, giving him a half smile, as if to say, She’s acting as mistress of the house. Riley was a little surprised at that, too, but maybe she just wanted to escape the room. Maybe she was really angry but not showing it. Maybe a lot of things.

“Do you have any coffee?” Liam asked. “I’m working the supper shift and will be at the restaurant till late. Some caffeine roaring through my veins would be great.”

“Is the coffee in the canister, Riley?” Brenna asked.

“You don’t drink coffee?” Liam asked.

“Not while I’m breastfeeding.”

Liam had black hair shot with silver, blue eyes and a ruddy complexion that just grew ruddier. “I see. Never thought of that. I admire women who put their baby’s welfare first.”

Riley and Brenna both knew exactly why that was. Shawna O’Rourke hadn’t had the fortitude, or the compassion, or the love a mother should have for her children, to stay.

His father shifted toward Brenna now. “So, what did your parents have to say? I’ll bet your dad popped a blood vessel.”

To Riley’s relief, Brenna retained her composure. “I’ve been living in New York ever since I left after high school, so I’m on my own. I make my own decisions, Mr. O’Rourke. Now I don’t depend on my parents for anything. Not even their opinion of what I should or shouldn’t do.”

“But you did once.”

“Yes, I did.”

“I knew you and Riley were an item, even if they didn’t. But Riley wanted to keep it a secret, so I pretended I didn’t know. My gut tells me Miners Bluff was just a little too small for you.”

“I wanted a career Miners Bluff couldn’t give me.”

“And you got it. Do you think your life’s a lot different than it would have been if you’d stayed?”

“Pop! Stop with the questions,” Riley erupted.

“I’m just trying to figure out what’s happening now. How are you going to be a father to your son when he’s in New York and you’re here?”

That was the question they were all asking.

“I’ll get that coffee.” Brenna didn’t move right away. Rather, she went to Derek first to make sure he was safe in Liam’s arms.

“I held four kids at one time or another,” he assured her. “I never dropped one of them. And I’m sober. Have been for five years.”

“I didn’t mean to suggest anything otherwise. He’s just so small. Even when Riley holds him, I feel I want to put a safety net underneath him.”

His dad chuckled at that and really looked at Brenna. “We didn’t get to know each other when you were in high school.”

“No, sir. We didn’t.”

“You really are an honest woman, aren’t you?”

“I hope so. I picked up a box of cookies that aren’t home-baked, but they’re good. Be right back.”

Riley couldn’t look away from her for a couple of moments. She’d tied her hair back in a ponytail. She was wearing jeans and a beaded T-shirt. Her belted waist showed her slimness. Her legs were long and curvy. Her feet were bare.

While his father played with Derek’s fingers and toes, Riley followed Brenna to the kitchen. At the doorway, he lowered his voice. “I never expected this to happen.”