A Baby Between Them

Her words infuriated him and he had to struggle to reply calmly. “Not true.”

“If you weren’t trying to avoid me, then why did you stop making monthly visits to Pittsburgh once I was made divisional VP?”

“I trusted you to handle the job.”

“Oh, really? And the switch from the conference phone calls you used to make to divisional VPs to group e-mails—that must have been another example of your great trust? It wasn’t because you didn’t want to hear the sound of my voice?”

“You’re reading too much into all that. And forgetting how busy I’ve been, with Harrison out of the office so much….”

Since he’d married Justine, Harrison had started working eleven months of the year from here on Summer Island. It had fallen on Aidan, who’d been promoted and given a huge raise, to fill in the gaps.

“Right.” She looked at him scornfully. “You’ve been busy. You haven’t been avoiding face time with the employee you screwed. And when I say ‘screwed,’ of course I’m speaking literally and figuratively.”

Aidan paced to the far corner of the room. He needed space to think. He needed to be calm and rational. But every time he looked at Rae’s enormous belly he felt as if he was about to have a panic attack.

Focus on something else for a minute. In front of him, the Kincaid china cabinet was filled with French Provincial serving dishes, teapots, ornaments. He felt like smashing the lot of them.

So much for calm and rational.

He turned to face Rae again. “What were you expecting me to do? We shouldn’t have slept together. It was a mistake and we both should have known better.” He let out a huge sigh of exasperation. “Because of my position of authority, I recognize that I shoulder the majority of the blame.”

She blinked and her head jerked back a little, as if he’d slapped her.

What had he said wrong this time? Surely she couldn’t deny that what they’d done had been ill-advised, to say the very least.

“Look, we’re two ambitious people, who in a moment of weakness…” He paused, remembering that moment of weakness, and how truly incredible it had seemed at the time. That night he’d wanted her so badly that he hadn’t cared about consequences. About any consequences. For the first time in his life he’d been so carried away that he hadn’t used a condom.

He hadn’t even asked if she was protected. Which, clearly, she hadn’t been.

“Rae, even if you think I’m the biggest jerk in the world…”

“Sounds about right.”

He decided to ignore that. “I still deserved to be told you were pregnant.”

“Really? Why?”

Her answer stunned him. “Because I’m the father.”

“So what? You contributed the sperm. Big deal.” With her hands still covered in protective mitts, she picked up the pan and tipped the loaf of bread on it into the trash. “This smell is making me sick. Or maybe it’s you. I’m not sure.”

Fighting words, again. But throwing insults back and forth wasn’t accomplishing anything. Aidan tried to see her side of the situation. “You’ve been through a lot. Maybe you’ve got reason to be upset with me. But at least you could have told me. Given me a chance.”

“A chance to do what, Aidan? Marry me?” She took off the oven mitts. Tossed them to the counter, as if she were issuing some kind of challenge.

“Is that what you want?” he asked quietly.

“Jesus, Aidan!” she exploded again. “I don’t even like you anymore. Why would I want to marry you?”

Okay, that hurt. But why? Wasn’t this exactly the real reason he’d sent her away? So that their feelings for each other might cool to a point where they’d be able to continue their professional relationship without the risk of messy emotional entanglement?

“As the father, I have responsibilities. At the very minimum, there will be support payments.” He pictured years and years of tidy monthly bills, and the thought of this obligation—which he was certainly capable of following through on—calmed him somewhat.

Rae crossed to the closest of the windows and opened it, allowing a fresh breeze into the room. Leaning her forehead against the frame, she fixed her attention on the ocean.

For a moment, Aidan admired the beauty of the woman. Rae had strong, compelling features, with thick, dark hair, rosy cheeks and a lush, wide mouth. Since the day he’d met her, he’d been attracted to Rae. Then, she’d been lean and fit, with small, high breasts and a curvy bottom he couldn’t tear his gaze from. Now, he was surprised to find that her new shape held a certain fascination for him, too.

He was so focused on the picture she made, outlined against the bright sunlight outside, that he almost missed her next words.

“This baby won’t need your support payments, Aidan.”

He took a moment to process that. “I know you earn a good living and you’re capable of handling everything on your own. But I can’t let you. It isn’t right. I’ll pay my share. And I want to be involved in other ways, too.”

That last bit startled him, as much as it obviously surprised Rae. She turned to him, her dark eyes narrowing skeptically.

When had he decided he wanted to be a father in a real sense? Aidan didn’t know. But it was true. He wasn’t going to walk away from this responsibility, no matter how much he didn’t want it.

She glanced out the window again. “That won’t be necessary. In fact, it won’t even be possible.”

So, he wasn’t good enough for their baby. He wasn’t surprised that she would think that. But what about financial support? Surely she didn’t mean to turn her back on that, as well. “You don’t want anything?”

“Not from you.”

This should have filled him with relief. Instead, Aidan was furious. With her, and with himself. He clenched his fists, and asked himself what kind of man felt like shaking a pregnant woman? Because that was certainly his urge right now. He wanted to grab her by the shoulders and make her look at him. He jammed his hands back into his pockets.

“You’re just saying that to hurt me.”

“I’m saying it because it’s true. You won’t have any responsibilities for me or anyone else.”

“But…”

“Aidan, listen.” She spoke sharply, her eyes flashing. “You won’t need to look after this baby, and neither will I. I’m not keeping it.”

FOR THE SECOND TIME that afternoon, Aidan looked utterly stunned, and Rae knew he wasn’t faking it. Even Johnny Depp couldn’t act that well. Still, it was hard to believe he hadn’t heard she was pregnant. Although they worked in different cities, there were constant phone and e-mail communications between the various branch offices and subsidiaries of Kincaid Communications. Surely someone would have told him?

But maybe everyone had assumed he knew. That she’d told him. Because the rumor mill had figured out their night together and, from that, had worked out the most likely reason she’d been banished to Pittsburgh.

And she had been banished, no matter how many times Aidan described it as a promotion. All acquisitions and mergers were handled out of the Seattle office, and that had been the reason Harrison had brought her into the organization in the first place. To handle those sorts of special deals.

Frankly, the everyday business she supervised in the Pittsburgh office, even though it did amount technically to a promotion in terms of salary and title, bored her silly. Aidan had to understand that. He was the same way. He thrived on the chase, just as much as she did.

It was one of the things she’d liked most about him, one of the reasons she’d thought maybe she’d finally met her match, in the romantic sense of the word. She’d never been attracted to men who weren’t as smart as she was, as driven and competitive.

Aidan had been all of these things. In addition, Rae had thought he was honorable and principled, too. That was the way he did business, at least.

But he’d slept with her, and then he’d shown her the door. Which made him a bitter disappointment…not the man she’d thought he was, at all.

Clearly still reeling from the emotional one-two punch Rae had just delivered, Aidan opened the sliding doors that led to the patio. He walked to the railing and, after a moment’s thought, she followed him there. This view had been a solace to her over the few days she’d been here. Now she gazed over the becalmed sea and wondered what it must look like during the winter storms. This would be a bleak place in December, she suspected.

“Why are you giving up the baby?”

“I would have thought that was obvious.”

In profile, Aidan’s chin was set, his mouth drawn in a long, disapproving line.

“I’m a career woman. Not the mothering sort. The baby will be happier with a mom and a dad. Parents who really want it.”

His gaze brushed against hers for a moment, conveying disbelief. “And you don’t? Want it?”

“Of course not.” What was he thinking? “You can’t be suggesting I became pregnant on purpose?”

“No.”

“That’s good. Because I didn’t. Men aren’t the only ones who can get carried away by…lust.” She chose that word because he, like most men, believed in lust and understood lust.

Whereas for her that night had been about magic and once-in-a-lifetime opportunities, but she’d be damned before she’d admit to him that she’d ever held such idealistic notions.

“You don’t think it will be hard? To give up the baby after it’s born?”

“Naturally it will be hard. This whole pregnancy business has been hard! Nine months has never seemed so long.”

Aidan reached out a hand to touch her, then withdrew it. “I’m sorry, Rae. You’ve been through so much. And coped with all of it on your own.”

She closed her eyes, hating the fact that he sounded so sincere and caring. He wasn’t really the kind of man a woman could count on. It was just that every now and then he happened to say exactly the right thing to make her crumble.

“When did you find out?” he asked softly.

“I suspected I was pregnant soon after the move.” Her breasts had been so tender and she’d been atypically tired; a drugstore kit had confirmed the news, all too easily.

“And you never considered…termination?”

“Why? Is that what you wish I’d done?”

A light shifted in his eyes and he made a noise of reconciliation. “Sorry, I forgot. You were raised Catholic.”

She’d told him so much about herself on that one night together. Far too much. They’d talked for hours, in between their lovemaking sessions. She’d felt as if she’d found her soul mate. He’d been so easy to confide in.

Later, she’d been mortified to realize that she had been the one doing most of the talking. She’d wondered if he’d even been listening.

Apparently he had. At least to some of her ramblings.

He was right about the Catholic upbringing, at any rate. She rarely went to church anymore and her mother had been dead for years, but still those childhood teachings rang in Rae’s ears.

So, no, abortion hadn’t been the right choice for her.

“Has it been tough, Rae? Were you sick at the beginning?”

“Yes, and I still get sick now, even though all the books say the nauseous stage is supposed to end after the first few months.” She turned her back to the railing and leaned against it. The wind in her hair was refreshing. What had possessed her to try baking a loaf of bread in this heat?

“It’s no fun looking like a house, either,” she continued. “Or having to drink all that milk, which I hate, by the way. Lately, I’ve had the worst heartburn. And just this week my feet have become so swollen I can only squeeze them into one pair of sandals.”

She saw him look down at her bare feet. In the past, she’d kept her toenails painted all the time—no matter what the season. But now they looked terrible. Even clipping them was difficult.

“Basically, being pregnant is rough. Anyone who says they like it must be crazy.”

Aidan listened to all her complaints without saying a word and she wondered what he was thinking. Was he judging her—and finding her lacking? There had to be something wrong with a woman who didn’t like being pregnant and didn’t even want to keep her own baby. Maybe he’d sensed this deficiency in her all along. Perhaps that was why he’d exiled her to Pittsburgh.

“Do Justine and Harrison know you’re pregnant?”

His question surprised her, but she nodded. “Sure.” Harrison had made a trip to the Pittsburgh office a month ago and Justine and Autumn had come with him. It was shortly after that visit that Justine had called her with the offer to use this house for the month of August.

Aidan rubbed his chin, thoughtfully. “So we were set up.”

“What are you talking about?”

“You told me Justine invited you to use this house, right?”

“Yes.”

“Well, Harrison extended the same invitation to me.”

“He did?” She thought of the duffel bag Aidan had brought inside. It was big. Obviously, he wasn’t here for a weekend jaunt. “So…what are we going to do?”

“Under the circumstances, we can’t stay under the same roof. Since you were here first, I’ll find lodgings elsewhere.”

She stared at him, wondering why his oh-so-rational plan didn’t sound at all appealing to her. It must be the hormones scrambling her thinking.

“I’ll be out of here as soon as possible, Rae.”

“Good. The sooner, the better.”

She tried to deliver her parting line with as much scorn as she could summon. Then she hurried inside, because damned if she didn’t feel as if she was about to cry.

CHAPTER THREE

AIDAN WATCHED RAE’S rushed exit from the patio. She was clearly upset and he knew he should follow her and try to calm her down.

But he wasn’t in any shape to help anyone right now. He held up his right hand. Sure enough, it was trembling.

Rae Cordell was pregnant with his baby.

He could not believe it.

His life plans had never involved getting married or having a child. Woman were too distracting. He’d learned that lesson at age sixteen, watching his friends make fools of themselves over Simone.

He’d wanted none of it for himself. Women were great, as long as you kept the upper hand. If you found that power slipping away, the smart thing to do was to back away immediately and find someone safer.

As he had backed away from Rae. Just one night together had been too much. He’d woken in a panic, knowing he’d made a terrible mistake. It wasn’t just that they worked together. He recognized something in Rae that he’d seen in Simone, too.

Like Simone, Rae had a natural ability to command attention. Call it confidence or charisma, or whatever the hell you wanted. Rae wasn’t a performer like Simone, but she still had star quality.

He’d wanted her the first time he’d met her. That on its own had signaled trouble, and so he’d tried to convince Harrison that the company didn’t need Rae Cordell. But Harrison was concerned about Aidan’s workload. He’d insisted they hang on to Rae, and so Aidan had been trapped. He’d done his best to keep one-on-one encounters with her to a minimum.

But the Triumph merger had undone all his best intentions. Late nights, last-minute negotiations and an out-of-town meeting had all added up to an impossible situation. One he hadn’t been strong enough to resist.

The morning after, he’d panicked. He’d slipped out of the hotel room without showering and caught an early flight to Seattle. Once back at the office, he’d immediately started working on damage control.

All the while, he’d berated himself. Why had he slept with her in the first place? He’d gone against all his principles. And presuming Rae had the contraceptives covered had to be one of the dumbest moves he’d ever made. Next to the night his mother died…

No. Don’t go there now.

Aidan rubbed the back of his neck, wincing at the thought of what Rae must have gone through these past months. She’d already shared some of the physical indignities of pregnancy…but what about the emotional burden?

Was she as blasé as she sounded about giving up the baby?

And what about the situation at work? He’d bet she hadn’t told anyone who the father of the baby was. But he guessed someone had figured it out. Which meant the entire company knew by now.

Everyone but him.

How was it that he hadn’t heard the rumors? Aidan thought back to a few occasions when he’d walked into an office or a meeting room and encountered a sudden, uncomfortable silence.

Well, of course no one had said anything to him. He was the boss. No one had dared.

Anyway, they must have assumed he knew. That Rae would have told him.

And she should have. Damn it, she should have told him about the baby.

TEN MINUTES LATER, Aidan went to the kitchen and found the Summer Island phone book. There weren’t any motels or hotels on the island. For the most part, the locals discouraged tourism. But there were a number of bed-and-breakfast places. He dialed Jennifer’s number first and was relieved when she answered in person and he didn’t get the standard recording.

“Hey Jenn, it’s Aidan. I’m here on the island and looking for a place to stay.”

“Aidan, you’re not kidding? You’re really here?”

“I’m on vacation.”

“You never take vacations.”

“I know. For good reason, apparently.” This one sure wasn’t going so hot.

“What do you mean?”

“Long story. I’ll fill you in later. For now, just please tell me you have room at your B and B. A single bed is all I need. I’m willing to share a bathroom.”

“Aidan, it’s August.” There was mild reproach in Jennifer’s voice.

Which meant she didn’t have room. And all the other B and B places in town would probably be booked, too. “What about a foldout couch?”

“We have one in the study. And I’d let you stay there, no problem, but that’s where we set up the crib.”

“Crib? Did someone forget to tell me something?” Was this a new trend? Had every single woman he knew gotten pregnant in the past nine months?

“I’m taking care of my brother’s baby while he and his wife are in Argentina. He’s teaching a four-week course.”

“You’re kidding.” He knew Jennifer already had to look after her father, who’d suffered a stroke many years ago, and an elderly aunt who’d moved to the island recently. Now she’d taken on her brother’s baby, as well?

“Afraid not. Look Aidan, I’m so sorry I can’t help you. Where are you now?”

“At Harrison and Justine’s.”

“They’re in Seattle for the month, aren’t they? Why don’t you just stay there?”

“Because while Harrison gave me a key to the place, Justine also gave a key to Rae Cordell. Rae works for Kincaid Communications, too.”

“Do you know each other? The house is certainly big enough for two….”

Not in this case. “I’ll figure something out. Not to worry.” Aidan heard a squawk. The baby?

“I’m dying to see you, Aidan. Why don’t you come for dinner tonight?”

He wanted to see Jennifer, too. But it sounded as though she had her hands full. He didn’t want her going to the work of preparing a meal for company. “How about I pick up some sandwiches in town and bring them over?”

“That would be great. I’ll make a few salads to go with them. Do you mind ordering enough for my dad and Aunt Annie, too?”

“No problem.”

“And why don’t you bring your friend Rae along, as well?”

He hadn’t said Rae was a friend. But before he could explain, the baby started squawking again, this time louder than before.

“I’ve got to go. I’ll see you and Rae later, Aidan. I can’t wait!”

JENNIFER WAS a naturally kind and hospitable person, so Aidan wasn’t surprised she’d extended an invitation to someone she’d never met. That didn’t mean he had to pass it on. However, if he didn’t, then he’d have to admit to Jennifer that he hadn’t, and then she would want to know why.

Aidan decided it would be easier to just invite Rae and let her say no.

He found her in the living room, feet up on the sofa, reading Forbes. He told her about the invitation. “Don’t feel as if you have to come.”

She amazed him by replying calmly, “That was very nice of Jennifer. Yes, I’d love to go.”

“You would?”

“Sure.” Her eyes betrayed nothing. No hint of the anger from earlier. No angst, no trauma, just…nothing.

“What time do you want to leave?” she asked.

“Half an hour,” Aidan said, giving her yet another reason to bow out. Not many women could get ready in that amount of time.

“Fine.”

True to her word, Rae was ready within thirty minutes. She’d combed her hair, put on a voluminous sundress and lipstick. She regarded her reflection in the full-length mirror of the foyer despondently. “I look like a puffer fish.”

She didn’t. She looked beautiful. It choked Aidan to admit it, but it was true. He’d never paid much attention to pregnant women before—he’d never had cause to. But despite her complaints, her insistence that she didn’t intend to keep the baby, there was an aura about her.

Rae grabbed her handbag, then waited while Aidan opened the door for her.

“Do you mind if I leave the top down?” he asked, as he helped her into the front seat of his car.

“It’s so hot—that would be nice.”

She needed a hand sitting down and he guessed she’d need help to get out, as well. He leaned down to find the lever to push the seat back and make more room for her bulk. Inadvertently, his shoulder brushed against her belly. It was surprisingly firm.

He stood up, embarrassed, yet oddly excited by the brief contact. That was his baby in there. And he’d touched her. It was still so incredible to him. Unbelievable and…amazing.

Wanting to touch again, yet knowing he couldn’t, he headed for the driver’s seat. As he reversed the car out of the driveway, Rae asked, “How far to your friend’s house?”

“Lavender Farm is on the north end of the island. About a thirty-minute drive.”

They stopped at the Cliffside Diner to pick up the packages of sandwiches that Aidan had ordered, then continued on the main road that circumnavigated the island.

Though paved, the route had many dangerous curves and the posted speed was low. Still, Rae’s long hair was whipped by the wind as Aidan accelerated. He leaned over to open the glove compartment and a navy silk scarf fell out.

“Use that.”

Rae gave him a questioning look, maybe wondering to whom the scarf belonged, then tied her hair back, as he’d suggested.

As the miles disappeared, Aidan began to relax. It was good to be on Summer Island again. The land to his left broke away to the ocean below with twenty-foot cliffs. The other side of the road was dotted with cultivated farmland and pastures that had been carved from the ancient rain forest. He slowed, in order to pass a small herd of cattle. A portion of the pasture fence had collapsed.

“Aren’t they beautiful?” Rae said. “I’ve never seen such black cows before.”

“Those are Kerries, an extremely rare breed of dairy cattle. They don’t produce as much milk as a Jersey or a Holstein, but the taste is incredibly creamy.”

Rae was surprised by Aidan’s detailed answer. “How do you know so much about cows?”

“For a couple of summers I worked at that farm. Mr. Olsen ran his operation the old-fashioned way, and I milked the cows by hand.”

Aidan could still remember the smell of the barn, the feel of the cows’ bellies against his head as he crouched low to access the fat, warm teats. There’d been a knack to coaxing the milk out of those teats and he’d been damn proud when he finally heard the satisfying metallic resonance of milk streaming into the galvanized pail held steady between his legs.

“I can’t imagine you milking a cow.” Rae looked at him speculatively.

“I loved that job. We’d carry the pails into the kitchen and Mrs. Olsen would run the milk through the separator. Once a week she’d give me a bottle of cream to take home to my mother. It was so thick, Mom had to spoon it into her coffee. But boy did it taste great on a bowl of fresh blueberries.”