Sarah's Secret

‘No.’ She hesitated. ‘Both my parents are dead.’

‘I’m sorry.’ Jake reached across to touch her hand fleetingly. ‘That must be doubly tough on you with a little girl to look after.’

Not a man to shirk sensitive issues, approved Sarah. ‘It was at first. Davy was so inconsolable I had to bottle up my own grief to try and help her through it. But don’t let’s talk of sad things,’ she said briskly. ‘I don’t want to spoil your evening.’

‘There’s no way you could do that,’ he assured her, and tapped the menu. ‘So what would you like to start?’

Sarah cast an eye down the list. ‘These all sound so tempting. I adore this kind of thing, but if I order one I never get through a main course.’

‘Then don’t have a main course. I vote we choose two or three starters each, then share the lot.’

‘Can we do that?’ she said, smiling in delight.

‘You can do anything you like,’ he assured her softly, with no smile at all.

CHAPTER THREE

PREPARED from the first to enjoy the evening, Sarah found her pleasure increased by the minute as they worked their way through baby asparagus wrapped in parma ham, crab cakes, a millefeuille of goat’s cheese with roasted red peppers, spicy chorizo sausage, fettucine with smoked salmon, and a platter of home-baked bread. And she was well aware that not all her enjoyment came from the food. The intimate process of dipping into each other’s plates was an ice-breaker which rapidly created a rapport between them new to Sarah since her student days.

‘Have some bread to fill up the corners,’ said Jake, buttering a slice for her.

‘This was a brilliant idea,’ she assured him indistinctly. ‘Are you sure you won’t have more corners to fill? This is a pretty light meal by average male standards.’

‘I object to the label of average male,’ he retorted, grinning. ‘Anyway, I ate a large lunch. How about you?’

‘I eat a sandwich at my desk every day.’ She shrugged. ‘As I said, I finish work at three, so I never take a lunch break.’

He frowned as he speared a slice of chorizo. ‘Don’t you get tired without a proper break?’

‘I’ve been doing it for years. I’m used to it.’

‘So, besides work, what else do you do?’

‘Cinema, theatre, and so on. Usually with women-friends.’ She hesitated. ‘And until recently I went out with a man on a more or less regular basis.’

‘What happened?’

‘He jilted me last Tuesday.’

‘Good God, why?’ demanded Jake blankly.

Sarah’s eyes danced. ‘He found someone else. Besides, he felt he wasn’t cut out to be a stepfather.’

Jake eyed her searchingly. ‘Was there any likelihood of that?’

‘Not the remotest chance! It wasn’t that kind of relationship. Besides, Davy didn’t like him. Though my grandmother did.’

‘Is your grandmother’s approval vital to you?’

‘Fortunately, no, because it’s hard to come by where I’m concerned. Her soft spot is reserved for Davy.’

He pushed the asparagus towards her. ‘You have that; I’m not keen on it.’

‘Really? I love it. I’ll swap for the chorizo.’ Sarah eyed the plates with respect. ‘These are all very generous for starters.’ She looked up in sudden suspicion. ‘Wait a minute. Did you—?’

‘I told them to be generous,’ he said, unrepentant. ‘At lunch today I was given allegedly king prawns the size of my thumbnail for a first course, so it seemed best to be on the safe side tonight.’

Sarah shook her head, laughing, and applied herself with relish to the asparagus.

‘Do you see much of your grandmother?’

‘We live with her.’ Sarah explained the arrangement in Campden Road.

His lips twitched. ‘Did you tell her how we met?’

Sarah laughed. ‘I could hardly avoid it. She was there when I arrived looking like a drowned rat.’

His eyes locked on hers. ‘I’m sorry I knocked you over. But on the plus side, if I hadn’t I wouldn’t have met you. And, as must be perfectly obvious to you, Sarah Tracy, I’m very glad I have.’

‘So am I.’

Their eyes held for a couple of heartbeats, then Jake said abruptly, ‘How about some pudding? They do a great one here with pecans and honey ice-cream. But you must eat a whole one yourself, or you don’t get coffee.’

‘I don’t want coffee, but I will eat the pudding,’ she assured him, because ordering it and waiting for it, and eating it, meant more time spent alone with Jake Hogan in the pretty garden which was empty now, as the evening grew cool. And she had other plans for coffee.

‘We could go inside if you’re cold,’ he offered, as their plates were cleared away.

‘I’d much rather stay here.’

‘Good. So would I.’ He gave the order for their puddings, then moved his chair closer. ‘Sarah, maybe it’s too soon to ask this, but when you know me better—as I fully intend you shall—you’ll find I tend to go straight for what I want.’

Sarah raised an eyebrow. ‘That sounds ominous.’

He smiled, his teeth showing white in the dusk. ‘Not really. I just want to repeat this kind of evening as soon as possible. Are you by any miracle free this Saturday?’

She shook her head regretfully. ‘I’m afraid not.’

Jake leaned closer, his eyes probing. ‘You mean you really are tied up, or am I rushing things, taking too much for granted?’

‘No,’ she said candidly. ‘You’re not. But this is where problems always arise with my social life. I’m never free at weekends because of Davy.’

‘Where was she last Saturday?’

‘Enjoying her very first sleepover with a school-friend.’

Jake eyed her thoughtfully. ‘But if you live with your grandmother wouldn’t she look after Davy for one night?’

‘I never leave Davy on the only two nights she spends at home.’ Sarah touched her hand to his to emphasise her regret. ‘Otherwise, Jake, I’d be only too happy.’

His hand captured hers and held it. ‘That’s some comfort. But I’m disappointed. Now I shan’t know what to do with myself on Saturday.’

‘What do you normally do?’ she asked, looking at their clasped hands.

‘Like you, I also had someone in my life until recently.’

‘Just the one?’

‘Absolutely. Though there were others in the past before her.’ He gave her one of his straight blue looks. ‘But just for the record, Sarah, I’m strictly a one woman at a time type.’

She returned the look steadily. ‘So what happened with your lady?’

‘Like your friend, she preferred someone else—ah, here comes pudding.’ Jake released her hand without hurry, but remained close as they ate, chuckling at Sarah’s unashamed sounds of appreciation.

‘That was wonderful,’ she sighed, scraping up the last smear of sauce. ‘All of it. In fact I enjoyed this meal more than any I’ve had in the most expensive hotel in town.’

And not just because of the food.

‘So have I.’ He leaned closer. ‘Did the idiot who jilted you take you to the Chesterton a lot, then?’

‘No,’ she said, and gave him a demure little smile. ‘Brian liked the one near the Pump Rooms.’

‘Ah! So that’s why you turned it down tonight.’

‘Partly. Though when you mentioned eating in a garden it was no contest.’

At last, with a reluctance Sarah shared, Jake got up. ‘It’s getting cool. Would you like to go inside?’

‘Not really. It looks very hot and crowded in there.’ She turned to look up at him as he helped her on with her jacket. ‘Would you like some coffee at my place instead?’

His smile was answer enough. ‘Just give me a minute to settle the bill.’

Sarah’s mind worked at top speed while she chatted on the short journey home with Jake. The leap of heat in his eyes at her suggestion warned her to make it clear, without offending him, that coffee meant just coffee. It was not a habit of hers to invite anyone back to share it. Sarah had always met Brian in town, and rarely asked him back to Campden Road to avoid encounters with the all too obviously approving Margaret. Oliver Bryce, the man she’d known before that, had always been in a hurry to get home to the babysitter after their evenings out, so the coffee situation had never arisen with him, either. Not counting visits from college friends, Jake Hogan, if he only knew it, was being granted a rare privilege.

When they arrived Sarah led the way to the sitting room, for the first time that evening ill at ease. ‘Do sit down. I shan’t be long—’

‘Sarah, don’t bother with coffee.’ Jake caught her by the hand, his eyes very serious. ‘Which doesn’t mean I’m about to leap on you. I meant I’d sooner have a glass of water.’

She flushed, feeling ridiculous. ‘Right. Water it is.’

When she got back with it Jake turned away from the photograph, looked at her closely for a moment, then turned back to study Davy again. ‘Exactly the same tortoiseshell eyes and shiny brown hair. Something in the expression, too. The resemblance is remarkable,’ he added.

‘Would you like to take off your jacket?’ she asked, to attract his attention away from Davina.

Jake put his glass on the table near the lilies he’d sent her, and removed his jacket, his eyes teasing as he grinned at Sarah. ‘Relax,’ he ordered. ‘I never ravish a lady on a first date, I swear.’

Sarah laughed awkwardly, feeling her colour rise. ‘I’m glad to hear it. Won’t you sit down?’

‘Yes,’ he said promptly. ‘If you will, too.’ He took her hand and drew her down beside him on her sofa. ‘Now, tell me why you’re on edge, Sarah. Bad experiences in this situation before?’

‘No, not at all.’ She braced herself. ‘I’ve never asked anyone back here before.’

He gave her an incredulous look. ‘Never? How long have you lived here?’

‘Nearly four years.’

‘Is this because your grandmother shares the house?’

‘Not really. She converted the house into separate flats for the express purpose of privacy for both of us.’

Jake took her hand. ‘I’m hoping against hope I know the answer, Sarah, but why me?’

Sarah shrugged. ‘I was enjoying the evening, and it’s not very late, so it just seemed the natural thing to do.’

His grasp tightened. ‘Actually, you pre-empted me. I was just about to suggest coffee at my place. Would you have come?’

She smiled a little. ‘You didn’t ask so we’ll never know.’

‘I’ll ask next time,’ he warned.

‘Is there going to be a next time?’

‘Damn right there is,’ he said, and kissed her. Then stared in astonishment as she immediately scrambled out of reach, her face flaming at the blank surprise on his face as he promptly removed himself to the other end of the sofa.

‘I meant what I said,’ Jake assured her. ‘No ravishing on the first date, Sarah. Just a kiss, I swear.’ He drew in a deep, unsteady breath. ‘Though from my point of view it was a rash move to share our meal in that particular way.’

Afraid to trust her voice for a moment, Sarah raised a questioning eyebrow, and Jake smiled wryly.

‘I meant, Miss Tracy, that for me the entire meal was a subtle form of foreplay. Couldn’t you tell?’

‘No. I thought we were just getting on well together.’ She hesitated. ‘So if you had asked me back to your place, and I’d agreed, you would have taken it for granted I was saying yes to a whole lot more than coffee?’

‘No, Sarah, absolutely not.’ Jake stood up, holding out a hand to help her to her feet. ‘Like you, I simply wanted to prolong our time together.’

She looked up into his eyes. And believed him.

‘So when can I see you again?’ he went on, as though the awkward little incident had never happened. ‘You said Saturday’s out, but how about Sunday evening?’

Sarah felt an overwhelming rush of relief. She had been so sure Jake would give up on her after her embarrassing little rejection. She couldn’t tell him that if she’d followed her instincts she would have let him kiss her as much as he wanted. Because with him she wanted it too. But that way danger lay. As she knew better than most, instincts had to be reined in, not followed blindly. Yet even on such short acquaintance she was sure that Jake would never force her to anything. And she wanted to see him again. She always felt a bit down after taking Davy back to school. Time spent with Jake Hogan would be the perfect antidote to her usual Sunday evening blues.

‘Yes. I’d like that,’ she said at last.

‘That took a long time,’ he said dryly. ‘What shall we do?’

She smiled at him. ‘If it’s fine I’d like a drive to somewhere pleasant with a view, then a long, leisurely walk.’

‘That’s a first,’ said Jake, laughing. ‘No lady in my past ever asked to go hiking before.’

‘No hiking—just a Sunday evening stroll, please!’

‘Whatever you want. What time do you get back from Davy’s school?’

‘About six.’

‘I’ll be here soon after, then.’ He looked down at her for a moment, then bent and kissed her forehead. ‘Goodnight, Sarah Tracy.’

‘Goodnight, Jake Hogan.’ She stepped back, her eyes suddenly serious. ‘Thank you for this evening. I enjoyed it very much.’

‘So did I.’ Jake followed her to the front door. ‘Next time you can introduce me to your grandmother,’ he said with a grin, and crossed the pavement to his car.

Sarah watched him get in, raised her hand in response to his wave as he drove off, then went back in the house and closed the door, her eyes wistful. The man was a charmer. Unlike comfortable, friendly Oliver, or staid, unimpassioned Brian, it would be all too easy to fall in love with Jake Hogan.

CHAPTER FOUR

SARAH was about to leave the office on Friday afternoon to collect Davy, when Alison Rogers rang her cellphone number.

‘Sarah, I’m in a fix. My car won’t start, and Don’s in London until tonight—’

‘No problem, I’ll pick Polly up,’ said Sarah promptly. ‘You just caught me; I’m on my way right now.’

‘You’re an angel! I’ll ring the school and let them know. See you soon—I’ll have tea and buns waiting.’

When Sarah collected them later Polly and Davina were in tearing spirits to be going home together, and full of their practice for sports day. They piled into the car, straw boaters askew, gingham dresses rumpled, both of them excited because Davy had beaten everyone in her class in the sprint.

‘But Polly came second at skipping,’ added Davy.

‘Well done, both of you!’

Polly smiled at Sarah expectantly. ‘Are you staying to tea? Mummy always bakes stuff on Friday, ready for when I come home.’

‘Please can we?’ urged Davy, hovering as Sarah stowed their belongings away.

‘Yes, but we won’t stay long. I’m sure Polly’s mummy saw quite enough of you last weekend. Now, tell me what else you two have been up to this week, besides races. How about boring stuff like sums, and so on?’

When they arrived at the Rogers house, Alison came running out to greet them. ‘You saved my life,’ she said gratefully, after embracing her daughter. ‘Take Davy off to wash hands, Polly. Sit down, Sarah,’ she added, ‘you look tired. Hard day?’

‘No more than usual. It’s just a rush on Fridays to get off on time to drive to Roedale.’

‘Davy told me you work at home in the evenings as well.’

‘Part of the deal with my employers. It only takes up an hour or so.’ Sarah shrugged, smiling. ‘In my circumstances the arrangement’s very convenient. When Davy’s home I work after she’s gone to bed.’

‘Hard graft just the same.’ Alison put plates of cupcakes and cookies on the table, went to call the girls, then sat down to pour tea.

‘Thank you,’ said Sarah, accepting her cup. ‘I rang my grandmother before I left to tell her we’d be later today.’

‘I’ve heard a lot about Grandma. Though I thought she was your mother.’

‘No, she dotes on Davy, but she’s actually my grandmother.’

Davina came running in with Polly, very much at home in her friend’s house. The girls polished off several cakes and cookies, swallowed down large glasses of the milk Davy always objected to at home, then rushed out to play in the garden.

‘Peace at last,’ said Alison with satisfaction, and refilled Sarah’s cup. ‘Have another cookie to assuage my guilt.’

‘Why guilt?’ said Sarah, amused.

‘It suddenly struck me that you’ll be picking Polly up next week as well.’

‘I don’t mind in the least. But I’ll have that cookie. They’re delicious.’

‘With the life you lead I don’t suppose you get much time for baking,’ said Alison with sympathy.

Sarah shook her head, laughing. ‘Actually, I do. Since Davy started boarding I have a lot more time to myself, socially and otherwise. But no baking. I’m hopeless at it. Lucky for us, my grandmother’s an expert. She also makes Sunday lunch for the three of us.’ Sarah smiled. ‘But during the week I fend for myself, or go out. Something I do a lot more than I used to now Davy’s in school. Beforehand I hated the thought of parting with her, even on a weekly basis, but now she’s settled in I confess I’m rather enjoying my new freedom.’

When she was finally able to tear Davy away Sarah drove home to find a message on her machine, but she sent Davy off to find Margaret before she allowed herself to listen to it.

‘Jake, Sarah,’ said familiar tones. ‘Just reminding you about Sunday.’

As if she needed reminding! But she played the message again twice, just to listen to his voice. Like a schoolgirl with a first crush, she thought sheepishly.

Margaret came down with Davy to announce that she was going out shortly, and had taken the liberty of making the sauce for their pasta supper.

Davy’s eyes lit up. ‘With lots of tomato in it? Goody.’

‘Thank you, Grandma,’ said Sarah shortly. ‘But I could have managed.’

‘Out of a jar, no doubt,’ said Margaret, after Davy rushed off to change. ‘By the way,’ she added coldly, ‘more flowers came for you today. I put them in water in the kitchen.’

‘Who are they from?’ said Sarah, surprised.

‘I’ve no idea. The card was addressed to you.’

Sarah hurried to the kitchen to take a card from the envelope propped beside an enormous bunch of brilliantly coloured zinnias. ‘They’re from Jake Hogan,’ she told her grandmother, who had followed behind to find out.

‘Again,’ commented Margaret. ‘He obviously enjoyed the evening with you.’

‘We both did. I asked him in when he drove me home.’

‘You’ve never done that before,’ said Margaret accusingly.

‘Don’t worry. He didn’t stay long.’

‘I know. I heard him leave.’

‘Then you know exactly how long he stayed,’ said Sarah evenly.

Margaret’s mouth tightened. ‘I don’t mean to be hard on you, Sarah, but you’re obviously attracted to this man, so do please be careful. Try to look at things from my point of view.’

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