Caring For His Baby

For a man who’d evidently been a bachelor a little more than a year ago, he seemed extraordinarily happy with the way things had turned out. They were in the garden, sitting in the shade of a big old tree and looking out over the sea, and every few seconds his eyes would stray to his family, an indulgent smile touching his mouth.

Harry could understand that. His own eyes kept straying to Em and her children, her revelation about their father still ringing in his ears.

He walked—well, ran, actually. I haven’t seen lightning move so fast.

Bastard. Fancy leaving them. Although maybe it had been better to leave them with Emily who clearly adored them than to stay and make them feel unloved and unwanted, and then at the first opportunity pack them off to boarding school and to their grandparents in the holidays…

‘So where are you staying? Georgie said something about your grandmother’s house.’

He wrenched himself back to the present and gave a rueful smile. ‘Well, that was the idea, but it’s had tenants since she died ten years ago and I haven’t been back since the funeral. To be honest, it was a bit of a shock, seeing it. The agents told me it needed some cosmetic attention, but I think they were erring on the kind side. It needs gutting, frankly, so I think we’ll have to rent something.’

Georgie lifted her head and frowned at him. ‘Is it really that bad?’

‘It needs total redecoration, and if I’m going to live there long term it’ll need a new kitchen and bathroom at least, but for now a lick of paint and some clean carpets would work wonders. I don’t suppose your father knows anyone reliable?’

Her eyes flicked to her husband’s. ‘We could send in the A-team.’

Nick chuckled. ‘Indeed. We’ve got a whole range of trades,’ he explained. ‘They’re used to working together, they do a good job, their prices are reasonable and at the moment they’re not busy because there’s been a hold-up on a development. So—yeah, if you want, we could send them along to give you a quote.’

‘Fantastic. That would be great.’

And if they could do half at a time, he could stay there. It was summer, after all, and he and the baby could spend most of their time in the garden.

He didn’t let himself think too much about why it seemed so important to stay there rather than rent another house—one that wouldn’t be next to Em. After all, she’d already made it clear she wasn’t interested in being Kizzy’s new mummy.

Not that he was about to ask her, or had even really thought about it for more than a moment, but he thought about it now—couldn’t think about anything else, in fact, however foolish he knew it was. If he had any sense he’d keep well out of her way and not indulge the foolish fantasy that they, too, could have a fairy tale ending like Georgie and Nick…

Emily was stunned.

If I’m going to live there long term?

He was considering it? Really?

She’d thought he was back for a few days—just a quick visit to sort out the house ready for the next tenants. It had never occurred to her that he might be coming back for any length of time—or maybe even for good!

But if he was back for good—no. She couldn’t let herself think about it. Daren’t let herself think about it, because her heart couldn’t take any more. She’d been stupid over Harry Kavenagh once too often, and she wasn’t going to do it again.

‘So when can you start?’

‘Tomorrow? We’ll strip all the wallpaper and rip out the old floorcoverings, decorate throughout and then you’ll be ready for the new carpets. Should take a week at the most with the team on it.’

‘A week?’

‘Uh-huh. Some of the windows need quite a bit of work, unless you’re going to replace them?’

‘Um—I hadn’t intended to. I was hoping to live here while you do it.’

‘With the baby?’ The foreman shook his head. ‘No. Sorry, I really wouldn’t recommend it. Not with all the old lead paint. It’s OK when it’s left alone, but when it’s disturbed it can be harmful to children, and she’s so tiny.’ His face softened as he looked down at the baby in Harry’s arms, and Harry’s eyes followed his gaze and his eyes locked with Kizzy’s.

Wide and trusting, fixed on him.

‘No, you’re right,’ he said, wondering what on earth he did now. ‘Come tomorrow. I’ll find somewhere to go. It’s not like there’s much here to worry about in the way of furnishings. I’ll get carpets and stuff organised for when it’s done, so it won’t be for long.’

He waved them off, hesitated on the doorstep and then went round to Emily’s house and rang the doorbell.

‘Oh. It’s you,’ she said, wondering if there would ever come a time when her heart didn’t hiccup at the sight of him. ‘I thought you would have come through the fence and knocked on the back door.’

He smiled a little awkwardly. ‘I don’t want to take advantage.’

‘You aren’t taking advantage.’ She opened the door a little wider. ‘Come on in. I was just about to have coffee. Join me.’

‘Thanks.’ He followed her down the hall and into the kitchen, perching on the stool awkwardly with Kizzy snuggled against his chest, and watched her while she made their drinks.

‘Still off coffee?’ she asked with a smile, and he shook his head, his mouth kicking up in an answering smile.

‘No. I need caffeine today. I’ve just had the decorator round. He’s coming tomorrow, but they’re going to hit the whole house at once and strip it all right out. I need to find a hotel for us for a week. I wondered if you’d got any ideas or recommendations?’

‘A hotel?’ she said, and then, knowing she was going to do it and utterly unable to stop her mouth making the words, she said, ‘Don’t be silly. You can stay here. It’s only a week. You’ll be no trouble.’

No trouble? Was she out of her mind? And what was she thinking, only a week? That was seven nights! Well, five if she was lucky and he was talking working weeks, but it was Monday now, and if they’d said it would take a week then there’d be a weekend in between and so it would be properly a week before the decorators left, and then the carpets would have to be fitted and the furniture delivered. So, next Wednesday at the earliest. Oh, rats. Still, the house was plenty big enough and there were three bathrooms. They wouldn’t be tripping over each other at least.

Besides, it was too late, because he was accepting, hesitantly, reluctantly, but still accepting, and only a real bitch would say, ‘Actually, no, I’ve changed my mind, I didn’t mean it at all!’

Or a woman whose life was complicated enough, whose heart was finding it altogether too difficult to be so close to the person who’d held that heart in the palm of his hand for so very many years…

‘I’ve found my old baby sling,’ she told him, putting the coffee down in front of him and lifting the sling off the end of the worktop where she’d put it ready to give him.

‘Baby sling?’

She smiled and handed it to him. ‘You put it round your shoulders and over your back, and the baby lies against your front, without you having to hold her all the time, so she can hear your heart beat and you have your hands free. They’re wonderful.’

He studied the little heap of soft stretchy cotton fabric with interest. ‘I’ve seen things like this all over the world—women tying their babies to them so they can work, either on their fronts so they can feed them easily, or on their backs.’

She nodded. ‘The so-called civilised West has just cottoned on. It’s a big thing now. They call it baby-wearing, as if they’d just invented it, but since you seem to be doing it anyway I thought you might like to borrow that to make it easier.’

‘Thanks. You’ll have to give me lessons,’ he said, putting it down again with a defeated laugh. ‘It looks like a loop of fabric to me.’

‘It is. Here.’

And just because it was easier to show him than to put it on him with the baby still in his arms, she looped it round herself, adjusted it, took the baby from him and snuggled her inside it, close against her heart.

Kizzy shifted, sighed and snuggled closer, relaxing back into sleep without a murmur. ‘See? Then you get your hands free.’

He gave a cheeky, crooked grin. ‘Or I could let you carry her, since you seem to be the expert.’

She laughed, sat down and sipped her coffee, relishing the feel of the little one against her, warm and curiously reassuring. No. She mustn’t let herself get too used to it. It was much, much too dangerous. Her heart had already been broken by this man, and there was no way she was going to let his daughter do the same thing.

‘I don’t suppose you want to come carpet shopping with me?’

She met his eyes over her cup. ‘Can’t you cope?’ she asked, desperately trying to create a little distance, and then could have kicked herself because she would have loved to go carpet shopping with him.

He shrugged dismissively. ‘Of course I can cope. I just thought it might be more fun.’

‘What, with Freddie in tow and Mini-Dot here yelling the place down? I don’t think so.’

‘She’s not yelling now,’ he pointed out. ‘Maybe she’s stopped that.’

Foolish, foolish man.

The baby began to stir almost before he’d finished speaking, and within seconds she was bawling her tiny lungs out.

‘I’ll get her bottle,’ he said, standing up, but Emily got up, too, extracted Kizzy from the sling and handed her to him.

‘I’ve got a better idea. You take her and deal with her, and when she’s settled, you can take her carpet shopping. And I can get on with my work.’

A fleeting frown crossed his brow. ‘I’m sorry. I didn’t realise you were working,’ he said, and took Kizzy from her arms. ‘We’ll get out of your way. And don’t worry about having us to stay. We’ll find a hotel.’

‘Harry, no!’ she said, angry with herself for upsetting him.

‘No, really,’ he said, his voice a little gruff. ‘I’m sorry. I can’t just come back here after all these years and expect you to welcome me with open arms.’

Oh, Harry, if you only knew, she thought, and her hand came out and curled over his wrist, holding him there with her. ‘I didn’t mean it like that. It’s just—I do have work to do, and Freddie is having a nap and it’s my one chance. Please, come and stay. I can’t let you go to a hotel. Not with the baby. Anyway, Freddie and Beth will love having her here. Please?’

His eyes were serious, searching hers for an endless moment, and then, finally satisfied, he nodded briefly. ‘OK. But we’ll try and keep out of your way so we don’t stop you working.’

She felt the tension go out of her like air out of a balloon. ‘Still want help with the carpet shopping?’ she said with a smile.

CHAPTER THREE

HE HADN’T realised just what an expedition it would be, shopping with three children.

Kizzy was more than enough trouble, but by the time he’d got her fed and settled and Freddie had woken up, Beth had come back from playing with a friend, so they were all going together.

And then, of course, because she was so tiny and seemed to be hungry every three minutes or so, he needed to take feeds for Kizzy, and because she was just like a straw he’d need nappies, and because he was so rubbish at putting the nappies on she’d need a total change of clothes…

He bet they took less equipment on an Arctic expedition.

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