Studio «BAN»

«But that’s with people watching,» Sam said.

«What did you think? That it was going to be a hidden camera?» Marcus asked.

«In porn, there are no outsiders,» Stavros added.

Shifting his weight from one foot to the other and glancing around, Sam asked:

«How much are you offering?»

«Five hundred.»

«A thousand,» Sam said without hesitation. But Stavros countered just as quickly, executing a swift calculation in line with his sharp way of thinking: «Girls get a thousand, and that’s only if they’ve got business-class bumpers.»

«Eight hundred,» Sam countered.

«Let’s go,» Marcus said, gesturing toward the exit. He and Stavros turned to walk away, but they had only taken a few steps before Sam called out: «Alright. I’m in.»

Marcus and Stavros walked back at a much brisker, less theatrical pace than when they were leaving. After a short pause, Stavros said:

«Are you sure you won’t chicken out at the critical moment? Get this through your head: we’re sinking crazy money into this, so if you even think about backing out, I’ll realign your orientation real quick. Capiche?»

The moment Stavros mentioned how much money the film was costing them, Marcus recalled the massive bouts of diarrhea he’d endured during the medical experiment to fund it.

Sam gave a couple of jerky nods without making a sound.

«Are you eighteen?»

Sam nodded silently once more.

Marcus added:

«All that’s left is to check the caliber.»

Five minutes later.

Marcus and Stavros stepped out of the restroom, and Stavros said:

«If we dress him up in the right gear, he’ll do just fine.»

Later that evening, Marcus and Stavros were sitting in the dorm room, scanning through porn clips. Over the span of a couple of hours, they had reviewed footage from more than two hundred movies.

Watching yet another scene from a video that had racked up 197 million views, Stavros said:

«Now, if Barbara could pull off a position like that, it would look incredible. But I guess that’s not an option for us.»

«Why’s that?» Marcus asked, surprised.

«Did you forget? According to our script, it’s a rape scene. If she positions herself like that, it looks way too consensual.»

«Fair point,» Marcus agreed.

After a brief pause, Stavros said:

«Let’s go back to that video with the Black guy with the long braids. In the second half, his movements sort of look like a struggle.»

«Should we bookmark it?» Marcus suggested.

«Good idea. We might want to weaponize that scene later.»

Every time he clicked another link, Marcus looked at the view count, multiplying one or two percent of those views by a couple of dollars for a download of their own film, preferring to calculate the financial potential based on the lowest baseline. And all he saw before him were millions of bucks. The thoughts were blowing Marcus’s mind. He calculated the theoretical metrics, and every single time, he came up with seven-digit figures. He could already taste the new life waiting for him.

Stavros, meanwhile, was pondering the scheme he had mapped out from the very beginning. Marcus suspected nothing, and Stavros knew his friend had no business knowing. Marcus was laser-focused on solving the immediate tasks, but developing a backup plan was completely alien to him. Stavros, on the other hand, chose to ignore the main exit, instead wondering exactly how many fire escapes the building had.

6. MAINTENANCE

Marcus was already about the call Barbara and Sam to set up a meeting at the clinic, where they were supposed to get tested for STDs. However, Stavros told his friend to put the brakes on. He enlightened Marcus on something that the would-be éminence grise of international politics, alas, didn’t have the brains to figure out himself. Stavros suggested talking the actress and actor into getting tested at their own expense, on the condition that if their systems came back clean, they would reimburse the costs out of pocket. In the event that either the actor or the actress turned out to be a venereal weapon of mass destruction, Marcus and Stavros wouldn’t compensate them for a damn thing, since any involvement in the shooting process would be completely off the table.

«It’s called ’budget optimization,»» Stavros added at the end.

Marcus thought the idea was brilliant, but he decided not to admit it openly and did his best to keep a straight face.

Since Sam was running late, Stavros stayed behind to wait for him in the clinic lobby, while Marcus and Barbara headed off to the lab.

After giving his blood sample, Sam approached Stavros, holding his arm bent with a cotton ball pressed against the vein. But before he could even open his mouth, Stavros said:

«If everything checks out, you’ll take another rapid test the night before the shoot. Until then, you’re dismissed.»

«What about the results?»

«Don’t sweat the results.»

«And what’s next?»

«I’ll call you.»

Sam headed back to the institute, while Stavros stayed to wait for the lab report. He adjusted his messenger bag, tugging the strap over his shoulder, and walked toward the nearest bench. At that moment, a nurse, looking to be about thirty, walked past. Stavros followed her with his eyes, evaluating the contours of her body through her white scrub pants. His first thoughts were about how good this little nurse would look in front of a camera lens, and she’d certainly have no trouble getting into character. Then he thought that maybe he should go over and try to pick her up. As soon as those thoughts let go of him, Stavros realized with a pang of sadness that working on the pre-production for a porn movie was starting to take too much of a toll on him. In any case, mentally, he had started veering off the main road onto the shoulder every single time he caught a glimpse of an attractive female silhouette.

He urgently needed to clear his head, Stavros thought to himself.

An hour later.

Barbara and Marcus were sitting in the clinic’s cafeteria, already holding the finalized lab results. While waiting for Stavros, they chatted about the upcoming battles with their own weaknesses, vices, and fears.

«Tell me, does it bug you — what’s going to happen when your parents find out?» Marcus asked, finishing his coffee.

Barbara propped her chin up with her hand, staring blankly into space. Her voice sounded a bit drained:

«You guys said yourself that this is all going to be paywalled. I don’t think my parents are the type to watch porn on a subscription basis.»

«Yeah, but screen-recording software exists. Some asshole is bound to pull that trick, and then our production will leak online for anyone to see. That drastically increases the risk that someone your parents know will recognize you and immediately want to ask them if they’re aware.»

Barbara paused to think, then said:

«Either way, I’m just going to hope there’s too much porn on the internet for ours to stand out from the crowd.»

«But still, what if the news actually reaches them?»

Barbara dropped her hand to the table, leaned back in her chair, and let out a deep sigh:

«It’ll mean it’s time for me to order a tombstone.» A brief silence hung in the air before Barbara continued: «But I need that brokerage account, and I need as many assets in it as possible. I have no intention of waiting until retirement age for my investment portfolio to start yielding a financial return. I want to start spending money on a comfortable life as soon as possible. Even better, I want to be able to afford a move somewhere like Spain or Greece.» Looking at Marcus’s curious face, Barbara leaned in and asked: «Well, what about you? Will your parents be cool with you just being behind the camera?»

«Well, I’m thinking of using a pseudonym in the credits. And once the payoff is tangible, my folks will probably lecture me for a bit, but given the financial metrics, I’m hoping they’ll get over it pretty quickly.»

Barbara averted her gaze, sinking even deeper into her thoughts, and said:

«Yeah. Your dilemma isn’t nearly as terrifying.»

A mix of materialism, ambition, anxiety, and a thirst for freedom played across her face.

«Oh!» Marcus exclaimed. «Look, here comes our guy.»

Stavros approached their table and, sitting down at the edge between Barbara and Marcus, said:

«Well, our rapist is clean.»

«That means we can keep moving forward,» Marcus said, clapping his hands together and rubbing them briskly.

Unlike him, Barbara’s appearance radiated zero enthusiasm. In her mind, she was cursing Marcus for getting her to open up about her relationship with her parents.

Marcus mentally checked off another box in his business plan, feeling like he had just advanced one step further.

Closer to evening, Stavros set up a meeting with Sam on campus. They crossed paths in the courtyard, which wasn’t as crowded by that time of day.

Glancing around to make absolutely sure no one was nearby, Stavros pulled a contract form out of his messenger bag, handed it to Sam, and said:

«Sign it.»

Sam’s mouth hung open for a few moments while he processed what was happening.

«My parents will literally rape me themselves if they find out,» he said, holding the form in his hands.

«Nobody’s asking you to show this piece of paper to your parents. And besides, in porn, nobody looks at the guys. Everyone’s only tuning in to gawk at the women. Come on, quit jerking around.»

Overcoming his own hesitation, Sam signed it anyway.

7. «LIGHTS-CAMERA-STRIP» COLLECTION

Marcus and Stavros thought this task was simple enough to handle on their own. After all, they still had plenty of time. But as it turned out, staging a set isn’t as simple as taking out the trash. The two producers quickly came to the conclusion that they needed to hire a designer — someone who could fix up the master bedroom and dress Barbara and Sam in the right gear. Their top candidate was Gloria Yaz, with whom Stavros was on excellent terms. Marcus knew Gloria too, though not as closely, and he completely agreed that if anyone could solve their problems with a snap of her fingers, it was her. All that was left was to see if she’d agree, though both of them suspected that money would hardly play a deciding role, given the kind of crazy ideas that rattled around inside Gloria’s head.

«Ah, boys,» Gloria said, opening the door to her dorm room when she saw Marcus and Stavros on the threshold. «Come on in.»

Gloria rocked a short blonde haircut with side-swept bangs and short strands framing her temples. She was slightly above average height (though, considering her passion for high heels, she was actually significantly above average), not too thin, and always bursting with an excess of energy that came through in her gestures and her voice. If Gloria ever decided to became a brand ambassador, she’d definitely be the face of Duracell.

She was majoring in Art, Culture, and Technology.

The guys stepped inside, and their eyes were immediately drawn to an unusual creation on Gloria’s desk. For her latest practical project, Gloria was crafting a multifunctional, transforming cabinet. Four months of work had turned the piece into something mind-boggling. Multiple layers of plaster, each with a different shape and contour, rotated on various pivot points. As a result, the cabinet could take the shape of Marilyn Monroe’s face, but when certain layers were rotated to a specific marker, Guy Fawkes’s face would emerge.

«Holy shit,» Marcus said when Gloria pulled off the trick, spinning the plaster layers.

«Just wait till I paint it, it’s gonna look completely different.»

As it rotated, the cabinet’s storage capacity shifted, revealing hidden pockets and a false bottom where valuables could be stashed. Overall, Gloria’s creation resembled a complex combination lock; to open each of the internal compartments, the plaster layers had to be aligned in a specific position, and there were nineteen of them in total.

«Don’t you think you’re a little too smart for this major?» Stavros asked.

«Thanks, Tiger,» Gloria replied. She had never been one to mince words since the first time she saw Stavros with his edgy haircut — the one with the horizontal shaved lines on the sides. She compared them to tiger stripes, and ever since, she called him «Tiger» whenever they met, completely ignoring his actual name, which was her habit with many of her friends and acquaintances.

«So, what did you guys want to talk about?» Gloria asked, her chin tilted up, playing into the wild curiosity that had consumed her ever since their phone call. She stood in her usual stance: her left arm held horizontally, while her right arm rested vertically against it, her fingers rubbing her palm.

Scratching the tip of his nose, Marcus said:

«We’re shooting porn.»

Gloria’s face twisted into a vivid grimace, though it was hard to tell if she was surprised or wondering, «Why the hell did you come to me with this?»

«We need a designer,» Marcus added. Gloria began pacing back and forth across the room as Marcus continued: «We need to pick out the right wardrobe for the actors and set up the room.»

«So,» Gloria started, not breaking her stride and pressing her index finger to her chin, «interior and wardrobe. Look, boys, clothes are a non-issue. We’ll definitely find something at the malls. The real question here is the combination and the context — and yours is quite scandalous. What exactly is going to happen in front of the camera?»

«A teenager rapes his friend’s mom.»

«Fascinating!» Gloria emphasized with sheer enthusiasm. «So, a mature woman and a total half-baked punk. Yeah, the archetypes are clear enough. Now, as for the interior…»

The guys already knew that her answer was a definitive yes. Gloria’s face was practically glowing with the anticipation of getting to work. It seemed as though, just by turning the tasks over in her mind, she was on the verge of having an orgasm herself.

«No. I’ll deal with the interior once I see the room. You do have the space already, right?»

The guys nodded in unison.

«Wonderful. The only thing we can do right away is buy a bedding set.» Gloria paused to think for a moment, then said: «Alright, here’s the plan. Tomorrow afternoon, I’ll have a three-to-four-hour window. Get your cast together, and we’ll all go hitting the shops.»

When it came to clothing, Gloria viewed the world rather simply. She either saw an expression of subtle taste on people, or just sheer junk and basic rags.

At the appointed time, Marcus, Barbara, Gloria, and Stavros walked into the women’s clothing department of the mall, while Sam was left sitting on a bench, waiting for his turn.

Despite her high heels, Gloria walked with a pace so fast and energetic that the others could barely keep up with her.

Passing the entrance to the department, Stavros abruptly slowed down, and then stopped altogether. His attention was caught by a girl checking out customers at the register. He forgot about the purpose of the mall trip, the porn, and everything else in existence. The only thing occupying his brain was a girl who looked suspiciously like his ex — Vivian. He had dumped her after she started throwing herself at some descendant of the victims of slavery. And they clearly weren’t talking about segregation, but rather the opposite — close integration.

But that had only been the last straw. Before that, Vivian had managed to completely drain Stavros’s sanity. She was annoyed by his ringtone and his constant requests to fuck in the cowgirl position. She began demanding that he get rid of his T-shirt featuring a rabbit screaming, «Long live freedom!» Soon after, the moment Stavros let his guard down for half a minute, she went through his texts with his friends and his cousin, whom Vivian mistook for a mistress. But to top it all off, she attacked his most sacred territory — his edgy haircut and the earring in his left ear. In short…

Seeing the girl at the register, Stavros couldn’t help but think of his ex. The resemblance was so striking that all the worst moments of the last months of their life together began flooding back into his memory. It seemed like the sight of this girl should have triggered pure negativity in him. Yet Stavros was certain that the world couldn’t possibly contain a second bitch of that magnitude.

Meanwhile, Gloria, Marcus, and Barbara were already standing near the mannequins displaying evening gowns.

«Alright,» Gloria began, evaluating a dress in meticulous detail, «we need something that adds about ten to twelve years to your age.»

Barbara looked at the dresses and pictured herself in them. On a bed. Raped. Three times over.

Marcus walked up and whispered almost directly into Gloria’s ear:

«You do realize that we absolutely cannot do without high slits and a plunging neckline, right?»

Gloria gave a reassuring reply:

«My sunshine, you don’t have to worry about a thing on that front. I’m going to turn her into the most explosive bombshell. We’ll dress her up so well that every impotent guy within a mile radius will be instantly cured.» Sorting through various clothing styles for a couple of minutes, Gloria asked Marcus: «Tell me, is the mommy rape scene the only thing you’ve got planned?»

«No. We’d like to do something else too. It’s just that the raped mom is going to be the main feature. Do you have some suggestions?»

Gloria said, maintaining a thoughtful look:

«I know it sounds cliché, but how about a queen and a rebellious slave? Or, say, a female boss coercing her young subordinate into sex… No! Better yet, an intern, but the sex suddenly shifts into rape as revenge for all the humiliation he took from the boss. How does that grab you?»

Following those words, Marcus’s imagination flared in vivid color. He said:

«That’s interesting.» He looked around and called out: «Stavros…»

But Stavros was nowhere to be seen.

While Gloria continued inspecting the dresses, beckoning Barbara over, Marcus searched for Stavros through the aisles. Soon, he spotted his head bobbing above the clothing racks. Stavros was walking toward Marcus, clearly deep in thought about something, and kept glancing back toward the cash register in a highly suspicious manner.

By the time Stavros walked up, Gloria had finished picking out the dresses and moved on to selecting pants, skirts, and blouses.

They approached the fitting rooms, where Barbara began trying on the wardrobe tailored for women in the 35-to-40 age range.

The moment Barbara stepped out of the fitting room in the first dress, the first complication hit. Marcus found himself trapped in the classic paradox of women’s fashion aesthetics: the sexier a woman was dressed, the faster you wanted to strip her naked. He stared at the cream-colored dress, which put Barbara’s left thigh on full display along with a cleavage window that he desperately wanted to cup.

If nothing else, it was clear that Gloria knew her stuff.

«Well, how do I look?» Barbara asked, spreading her arms and tilting her head up slightly. She closed her eyes as she did it, as if expecting to be ambushed at any second by either a crowd of screaming fans or a sex crazed maniac.