The Blackcoat Rebellion

He wrapped his arms around me protectively, rubbing circles on my back, and the heat of his body warmed me from the inside out. If I could have stayed like this for the rest of my life, I would have. “You have nothing to be sorry for. Those fireworks scared me, too.”

“Leave it to Daxton to figure out a way to terrorize me at my own birthday party,” I grumbled. “How long do you think we’ll have before Knox comes looking for us?”

“Not long enough,” he said, and I sighed. It was never long enough.

The doors slid open, and together Benjy and I headed into the fourth floor wing. My suite was down the hall from Knox’s, and I would have given anything to drag Benjy inside and disappear for the rest of the night. But the party wasn’t the only thing happening tonight, and I wouldn’t have missed another Blackcoat meeting for anything. I was already behind enough—immediately after Augusta had died, Knox and the Blackcoats had seized the opportunity and sent me around to several cities across the country to rally supporters while Daxton was still too busy recovering to pay close attention. Denver, New York, Seattle, Los Angeles—I’d traveled for over a week, and by the time I’d returned, everything within the Blackcoats had shifted. Lila and her mother—Daxton’s sister, Celia—had gone underground to hide, leaving Knox in control. Even now, weeks later, I was still catching up on the plans they’d come up with while I’d been away. I couldn’t miss anything else.

The lights in Knox’s suite turned on automatically as we stepped into the sitting room. Even though my knees had stopped shaking by now, I let Benjy help me to the couch, eager for as much contact as we could get before Knox returned. It had been days since I’d been able to steal as much as a simple hug from Benjy, who, as a legitimate VI, had earned his place as Knox’s assistant. But with Knox constantly hovering over us, raising an eyebrow each time I so much as dared to smile at Benjy, it was next to impossible to find any time to just be with him. And that, above all else, was what I missed about my old life.

“I’m sorry I didn’t find you earlier,” I said, tucking my legs underneath me on the sofa. The navy leather was cool against my skin, and after spending hours in the sweltering ballroom, I welcomed it.

“Don’t be. It isn’t your fault.” Benjy sat beside me and draped his arm over my shoulder, and I wasted no time curling up against him. “I nearly punched Minister Bradley for the way he was looking at you, though.”

I grinned. “That would have made the whole thing infinitely more interesting.”

“Until I was sent Elsewhere,” he said. “Then it wouldn’t have been as funny.”

My smile vanished. I touched his cheek, turning his head until he was facing me. “You know I won’t let that happen, right? No one’s going to hurt you, not while I have something to say about it.”

“I’m not the one you should be worried about.” His gaze met mine, and he leaned in slowly until his breath was warm against my skin. “Promise me you won’t take any more chances, Kitty. What happened tonight—”

“I couldn’t help it,” I said. “I didn’t even know what was happening until it was over.”

“That isn’t what I meant,” he said softly. “I overheard what you said to Knox. You’re doing this for the right reasons, all right? I know it’s hard sometimes—”

“You have no idea.” My face grew hot, and frustration boiled inside me, threatening to burst the last ounce of self-control I had left. “Having to be someone else all the time—never getting to be me anymore, having my every move watched... I’m losing myself, Benjy. Sometimes I look in the mirror and forget this isn’t my real face. And sometimes—sometimes I feel like Kitty Doe died, and even if Knox lets me walk away from this tomorrow, I’ll never find her again.”

Heavy silence settled over us, and Benjy’s gaze bore into mine as he traced my lower lip. Lila’s lower lip. “She didn’t die,” he whispered. “I see her every time I look at you. You are vivacious, and no one—not even Lila Hart—will ever drown you out. I don’t care what you look like. The real you will never fade.”

He had no idea how badly I needed to hear that right now—or maybe he did, and that was exactly why he’d said it. I slowly gravitated toward him, my entire body aching to be as close to him as possible. But before I could kiss him, he shifted and slipped his hand into his suit pocket.

“I almost forgot—I made you a birthday present,” he said, and I sat back, disappointment washing over me.

“It isn’t my birthday,” I said. “It’s Lila’s.”

“Then consider this a belated birthday present. Or an early one. Whichever you’d like.” From his pocket he pulled a white cloth napkin, the sort that had been folded into peacocks around the buffet. He’d refolded it into a simple square, and I raised an eyebrow.

“It’s...lovely,” I said. “Thanks?”

He laughed, a deep, throaty sound I would never get tired of hearing. “Open it.”

I unfolded the napkin, and my eyes widened. On the inside was a simple ink drawing of a house on a lake. Sitting in a field beside the lake were two stick figures—one with long hair, and one with Benjy’s freckles. They cuddled together as the sun shone down on them, and a lump formed in my throat.

“I can’t make this better right now,” said Benjy, “but I can promise that it will be one day. We’ll have our cottage in the woods, or our cabin on the beach—whatever you want. I’ll go anywhere as long as you promise you’ll be there with me. I’m going to spend my life with you, Kitty, and I don’t care if the entire country tries to stop us. You’re my future. It’s always been you for me, and it always will be.”

Finally he closed the distance between us and kissed me—a sweet, gentle kiss that held within it every single one of the thousand days I’d loved him as my everything, long after I’d begun to love him as a friend. I shifted into his lap, not caring whether or not someone could walk in at any moment and see us. I needed this. And after all we’d been through together, Benjy and I both deserved this.

He wrapped his arm around me again, safe and secure as I ran my fingers through his hair. He tasted like home. Like everything I missed about my old life, where we would spend the evening curled up together as he read to me. We would never have those moments again, but as soon as we were free of this place, we could make new ones. I’d spent so much of my time worrying about the present, worrying about being Lila, that I’d never let myself stop and think about what my future might hold. It seemed almost like asking too much—like I was challenging the universe by thinking about a life with Benjy as far away from the Harts as possible.

But Benjy had always been an optimist. He’d always seen good in the world where I wasn’t so sure it existed. And this kernel of hope, this ink on cloth, was exactly the future I wanted. I knew in that moment, as I deepened the kiss between us, that I would do whatever it took to get it.

“Kitty,” he whispered, breaking away long enough to glance anxiously at the door. “We shouldn’t be—”

“I am so sick of being told what I should and shouldn’t do,” I murmured. “Everything will be fine. Trust me. Knox agreed to let me stay in here tonight. He’s pretending I’m sleeping in his room, but he’s going to let us have the night together.”

Benjy’s gaze snapped back to me. “You mean—?”

I nodded. “I think it’s about time, don’t you?”

Even though we’d been together for years, finding a moment alone in a group home with thirty-eight other kids hadn’t exactly been easy, and neither of us had wanted it to be rushed. Now that we were both seventeen, I was Lila Hart, and Benjy was my fiancé’s assistant. It was dangerous, but behind closed doors, with Knox willing to cover for us—we would finally have that freedom. I wasn’t wasting it.

“The wedding’s less than a month away,” I said. “We might not have another chance before then, not like this. And I’ll be damned if I’m marrying Knox without showing you exactly how much I love you.”

Benjy blinked, looking torn between eagerness and confusion. “Is that why you want to do this? So Knox isn’t—”

“If he thinks I’m ever letting him touch me no matter how married we are, he’s going to lose his hand,” I said. “I want to do this, Benjy. More than anything. If you don’t, we can wait, but—”

“I want to.” He sounded breathless, and he pressed his lips together, his eyes locked on mine. “Like you said, more than anything. I love you. I just don’t want Knox to be the reason you’re doing this.”

“He’s not, and he never will be.” I brushed my lips against his again. “You’re the only reason I need.”

“Ahem.”

I sprang apart from Benjy, my heart racing. Knox stood framed in the doorway, his arms crossed and his brow furrowed. “Ever heard of knocking?” I said, glaring at him.

“Considering it’s my suite, no.” He pushed off the wall and closed the door. “If you keep this up, it’ll only be a matter of time before someone catches you. I won’t be able to protect you then.”

“So I’ll tell them the truth—sometimes a girl just needs to be kissed instead of slobbered on.” I tucked Benjy’s drawing into the pocket of my dress. “Is the party over already?”

“No, but I couldn’t very well stay down there while my fiancée was ill upstairs. Speaking of, how do you feel?”

“Better,” I said, doing my best to look like nothing was bothering me at all. “When are we going?”

“We are not going anywhere.” Knox moved to his desk and bent down to touch the screen. “I am leaving now.”

“What? But—”

“Do you really think I’m going to let you come, after what just happened down there?” said Knox. “You need your rest.”

“That wasn’t my fault.”

He straightened. “Fainting aside, you’re having a bad day, and the last thing you need is a long night. The last thing I need is to worry about whether or not you’re holding up all right.”

“I’m fine,” I insisted. “Knox, please. We’re in this together. You said so yourself—”

“And right now that means I have to look out for you and your health. You’re exhausted. Your temper’s shorter than it’s ever been. Look at you—you’re practically shaking. You’re a liability, Kitty, and tonight is too important for me to take that kind of risk. I’ll fill you in when I get back, but right now, I need to go.”

I gaped at him. “You can’t just cut me out like this—”

“I’m not cutting you out,” he said steadily, but there was an edge of impatience to his voice. “It’s one meeting.”

“I’ve already missed three because of the speeches.”

“There will be plenty of others,” said Knox. “And look on the bright side—you’ll have even more time to spend with Benjy.”

Tempting as it was, staying behind meant missing the entire reason I had agreed to put up with this and people like Minister Bradley in the first place. I would have the rest of the night to be alone with Benjy—right now, I wanted to be a Blackcoat. I wanted to do what I was here to do: be the voice of a rebellion that, if successful, would mean Benjy and I would one day have that cottage by the lake. It would mean never looking over our shoulders again, worried someone might see us and catch on to who I really was. It would mean being Kitty Doe again instead of Lila Hart. It would mean finding myself and being the person Benjy saw when he looked at me. The more meetings I missed, the more excuses Knox would have to dismiss my opinions and push me aside. I was here to fight. Not to be his prop or his mouthpiece. And no matter how much he insisted I wasn’t, everything he had done that evening had said otherwise.

I cast a frustrated look at Benjy, and he slipped his hand into mine, giving it a reassuring squeeze.

“It’s probably better if you relax tonight,” he said. “I think you’ll like this new book I bought the other day. I’ll read some of it to you, if you’d like.”

“Enjoy some time with your boyfriend, Kitty,” said Knox. “I’ll be back soon enough. If anyone checks on us, tell them I’m in the shower.”

“Yeah, taking a cold one,” I grumbled. He didn’t rise to the bait, and instead he disappeared into his closet and up through the secret passageway that lay behind it. He’d shown it to me one of my first nights in Somerset, and it was the only safe way we had of leaving the property undetected.

As soon as he shut the door, I stood. “I’m going after him,” I said, tugging down the hem of my dress. Not the outfit I would have chosen, but I didn’t have time to change. “Cover for me.”

Benjy stood as well, reaching out as if to stop me. “Kitty, you heard him—”

I twisted away from his grip. “If it wasn’t for him, we’d have this by now.” I gestured to the napkin sticking out of my dress pocket. “We wouldn’t have to worry about the Harts or the wedding or fireworks driving me crazy. We’d be happy, and we’d never have to think about this nightmare again. Instead, Knox asked me to stay, and I did. Not for him, not for Lila, not for the parties or the jewelry or the private planes, but because of this.” I jabbed my finger toward the closet. “If I’m not there, then what’s the point of doing any of this anymore? I’m not his property, and he doesn’t control me. I’m not letting him leave me behind.”

Benjy sighed, but at least he didn’t argue. “Then I’ll go with you.”

“Someone has to stay behind and make sure no one finds out we’re gone,” I said. He opened his mouth to protest, but I cut him off. “Please, Benjy. It’ll be safer if it’s just me anyway.”

He gritted his teeth, and a muscle in his jaw twitched. “Okay. Just—be careful. And here, take this.”

He shrugged off his suit jacket and draped it over my shoulders. I slipped my arms inside the sleeves, the fabric warm from his body. “Thanks,” I said, softening. “Make sure no one discovers we’re gone, all right?”

“I’m sure I’ll figure something out,” said Benjy, scowling. I stood on my tiptoes and kissed him.

“I love you. When I get back, I’m yours for the rest of the night. Okay?”

He nodded, and without giving him another chance to talk me out of it, I stepped inside the closet. Knox may have thought he owned Lila, but I wasn’t her. Tonight, I was Kitty Doe again, and I wasn’t going down without a fight.

II MIDNIGHT MEETING

The passageway above the fourth floor was as dusty and dirty as ever. Without a flashlight, I was plunged into darkness, and even after my eyes adjusted to what little moonlight filtered in, I couldn’t see more than a few inches in front of me. Cobwebs caught my hair and cheeks, and once I thought I felt a spider running down the back of my dress, but I forced myself to stay calm and move forward. I’d taken this route a dozen times before. I could do this.

At last I found the staircase that led downward, and from then on out, it was only a matter of not tripping. The heels I wore made that more difficult than it should have been, and twice I had to catch myself on the wooden bannister. By the time the creaky steps turned into the dirt tunnel underneath the grounds of Somerset, I’d collected two splinters in my palm, and I was fervently wishing I’d stopped long enough to grab a pair of boots.

The tunnel was pitch-black. I ran a hand across the dirt wall to guide me, keeping my ears peeled for any sign of Knox. But I would have seen the light from his flashlight if he was still in the tunnel, and satisfied that I was alone, I picked up the pace. I had no guarantee I’d be able to slip into the bunker undetected. By now the guards knew me, but I didn’t have the codes, and I’d have to catch up to Knox if I wanted access. Even then, it was entirely possible he’d tell me to go home, though if he thought I would listen after his little speech in the suite—

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

A hand clamped over my wrist, tugging me away from the wall, and I swore loudly enough that they probably heard it back in Somerset. Yanking my arm away, I thrashed wildly in the darkness. “Let—me—go!”

Light flooded the tunnel, and Knox stood with his free hand still wrapped bruisingly around my wrist. “Not until you answer my question.”

“I will kick you again,” I said, squinting against the brightness.

“Still not an answer.”

I scowled. “What do you think I’m doing? I’m coming with you.”

“No, you’re not.”

“Yes, I am.”

His eyes narrowed, and for a long moment, we stood face-to-face, both waiting for the other to back down. Neither of us did.

“Do you understand how delicate this situation is?” said Knox. “If you and your aversion to obedience say the wrong word to the wrong person—”

“Maybe if you stopped acting like I’m an untrained dog and started treating me like a person who’s as much a part of this as you are, I’d stop pulling against your invisible leash,” I said. “I have every right to be there, and you know it. If you keep acting like I’m a liability—”

“I wouldn’t if you stopped being a liability.”

“—then I’ll leave,” I finished, ignoring him. “If I can’t work with the Blackcoats, then I don’t have any reason to be here anymore.”

“Oh?” Knox arched an eyebrow. “And where would you go?”

“It doesn’t matter. I’m here because you asked me to be part of this, and I agreed, because it is the right thing to do. But this—leaving me behind, treating me like I’m incapable of making a right move without you—this isn’t what I signed up for. If you don’t let me go to that meeting, then I’ll disappear. I don’t care how many Shields you have searching for me. Scour the entire country. You will never find me.”

His brow furrowed, and a muscle in his jaw twitched. “I asked you to stay because I thought you’d cooperate and help us. The more time I spend chasing after you and cleaning up your messes, the less time I have to focus on the rebellion. Do you understand?”

“The more you treat me like a child, the more likely I’ll be to act like one,” I said calmly, keeping a tight rein on the anger boiling inside me. I wasn’t about to give him any reason to dismiss me. “Do you understand?”

He narrowed his eyes. “Fine. You start behaving, and I’ll start trusting you.”

“Good. Now let go of me.”

Knox released my wrist, and I rubbed it, hoping it didn’t bruise. Purple would be hard to hide against Lila’s porcelain skin.

“Come on, we’re going to be late,” he said, and he led me down the dirt tunnel, the beam of light swinging with each hurried step. “Celia and Lila are supposed to be there tonight, which means you have to watch what you say, all right?”

“Watch what I say about what?” I said, concentrating on putting one foot in front of the other without stumbling.

“They still don’t know Daxton’s an impostor,” he said. “No one does.”

I blinked. “Wait—you mean you haven’t told any of the Blackcoats?”

“Of course not. One of them will inevitably leak the information to Celia, and as soon as she finds out, she’ll storm Somerset and throw our entire plan into jeopardy.”

I frowned. Celia, Lila’s mother and Daxton’s sister, was the reason so much of this had happened in the first place. After Daxton had brutally executed her husband, she’d created the Blackcoats, an underground army bent on seeing the Harts stripped of their power and the ranking system abolished for good in favor of the democracy on which America had been built. In the process, she’d used her only daughter, Lila, to captivate the crowds and ensure even more support from the higher ranks for her rebellion. Lila had been reluctant, though, and as the target on her back grew and word of her impending assassination reached their ears, she and Knox had formed a plan: fake her death and hide her underground, where Daxton would never find her. No one else, not even Celia, had known.

The only thing they hadn’t counted on was Daxton having someone else Masked to take Lila’s place—me. And as soon as they discovered what had happened, my education about the real horrors of the country had begun. They’d involved me in the Blackcoats’ plans ever since, and like hell was I giving up my chance to make a difference just because Knox said so.

But Knox had kept Celia in the dark about nearly everything. Even she hadn’t known about her daughter still being alive until she had kidnapped Greyson, Daxton’s son, in an attempt at retribution. She’d never wanted to harm him, but the Harts hadn’t known that, and in the process of rescuing him, they thought they’d killed Celia—and me, for that matter. Luckily for both of us, we’d survived.

While I had agreed to take Lila’s place on a more permanent basis, however, Celia had been forced underground. Not that I thought she minded, but Knox was right: if she found out Daxton wasn’t really Daxton after all and she—or Greyson—should have been ruling the country instead, she would have unleashed the Blackcoats on Somerset without a second thought. Or a cohesive plan in place.

“We have to tell Sampson and the others eventually,” I said. “If they know, maybe they can strategize—”

“It won’t matter,” said Knox as we reached the metal door that opened up to an abandoned alleyway. “They could try to out him, but the media is in Daxton’s pocket. Anyone who went to press with the news would be labeled a traitor and executed before sundown. No one should have to make that sacrifice for nothing.”

The cold December night made me shiver, even with Benjy’s jacket. But it wasn’t far to the bunker, and I hugged myself and toughed out the chill. “The Blackcoats don’t have contacts in the media?”

“Of course we do,” he said. “That doesn’t change the fact that it won’t make any difference. There are a million ways Daxton could spin it, and he’ll never let anyone close enough to prove it.”

“What about Greyson?” Daxton’s eighteen-year-old son was less than enthusiastic about following in his father’s footsteps, but even inexperienced, he would be infinitely better than Daxton.

Knox’s mouth formed a thin line, and he wrapped his arm around my shoulders. Normally it would have been a sweet gesture, but tonight it felt more like a threat. “Do you want to see the masses go after him once the rebellion begins?”

“You mean it hasn’t already?” I said, but he didn’t answer. I bit my lip. Greyson was one of my only friends, and the last thing I wanted was for him to get caught in the cross fire.

We were meters from the bunker when Knox stopped and faced me, his dark eyes bearing into mine. “Listen to me, Kitty,” he said in a low, hurried voice. “Telling the others about Daxton doesn’t outweigh the risks of Celia finding out—and if the other Blackcoat leaders know, she will find out sooner rather than later. And what happens after that is anyone’s guess. Do you understand me?”

“But maybe one of them could think of a way to get the word out and turn Daxton’s supporters against him,” I said. “Too many people have already died—”

“Those people were willing to risk it,” said Knox. “We’re all willing to risk it.”

“I’m not willing to risk Benjy’s life,” I said. “He didn’t agree to any of this, and if there’s a war on Somerset, he’ll get caught in the middle.”

“I’ve already promised to protect you both—”

“You’re not a god, Knox,” I said. “You can’t guarantee we’ll both get out of this alive, and you know it. If we tell them, we could find a way to replace Daxton and have a revolution without anyone else dying—”

“There’s no such thing as a bloodless revolution.”

Knox’s voice cracked like a whip through the alleyway. He glanced around quickly, as if to reassure himself we were alone, and then leaned in close enough for me to smell the champagne on his breath. Not strong enough to knock me over, but it was a stark reminder of the evening we’d had.

“I’ve made you a lot of promises, Kitty, and I intend on keeping them. But I can’t do that if you second-guess every move I make and insist on being in the middle of everything. Do you want a rebellion, or do you want to keep things as they are? Because this isn’t a problem that a single bullet will solve. Even if we cut Daxton out of the picture, we still have the entire government to worry about—including all twelve Ministers of the Union, who will see a chance to seize power for themselves and do everything they can to make it happen. Daxton will be removed from his position one way or the other, but there are countless other steps we have to take in the meantime before we even consider putting that plan into action. People are going to die no matter what we do. Right now, all we can do is try our best to minimalize the casualties.”