Victor Serenus

“O Cassia, well beloved! my soul’s earnest longing is that thou also might have regard to this truth, for its value is above rubies! Wilt thou not open thy heart to its sweet spirit? My love waxeth strong towards thee, but I am constrained to make known everything concerning myself. Thou freely gavest me the love of thy heart and thy steadfast promise of faithfulness, but perchance thou wilt not regard me as the same Saulus that possessed thy warm affection. But with all humility I am persuaded that my present state is not to be compared with the former time, when I was given over to angry disputations, yea, and fiery persecutions, which are among the base things that I forever have put behind me.

“In the place of hatred for all but the straitest sect of the Chosen People, I now exercise love towards all men. Dost thou not see, O my Cassia! that we were altogether fettered in our doctrine; for a Godly religion aboundeth in peace, joy, and good-will. If thy soul yet yearneth with affection towards thy lover, I pray thee that it may go out even more strongly in the favor of this great and living Faith!

“Behold we were altogether mistaken about the evil intent of the followers of the Nazarene! Through false report and a perverted mind we believed these children of the Light to be idolaters and unclean. But verily, they have a ministry of goodly service and longsuffering.

“It is meet that I should write unto thee, O my little Cassia! with mine own hand, to give assurance that my soul’s affection for thee abideth single and true. I pray thee that thou consider well that the new and all-abounding joy that I have in the New Faith hath not rendered me unfaithful. But I can in no wise abate one jot or tittle of my devotion to a great future work,—to bring all men, so far as I am able, to a knowledge of the truth. This new and higher way was made manifest for all the world through the despised prophet of Nazareth, whose disciples I have so grievously smitten and afflicted aforetime.

“To thee, O Cassia! I remain with all constancy, if thy heart’s affection still aboundeth to me-ward, not the same self-willed zealot thou hast known, but the devoted Apostle of the Most High, and the earnest minister of the New Faith to all men. But with my love in no wise abated towards thee, nothing on earth, not even the utter loss of thy devotion, can in the least tempt me to turn back to my former manner of mind. If thou hast no desire to receive the new Saulus in the place of him whom thou hast known, behold I freely give thee release from all thy plighted faith, so that thou mayest be fully free.

“Perchance divers rumors have come to thine ears concerning me, but I beseech thee to give them no place. Howbeit, in this epistle I have fully opened my heart unto thee.

“Of all the company that left the Holy City under my leadership, Amoz alone remaineth with me.

“Again I declare my love, and send greetings to all thy father’s house!

“Peace to thee, Cassia!

“Saulus.”

On the same day that the above was written, Saulus wrote the following to Rebecca, who was now in her Tarsian home. Both letters were despatched by Amoz to the station where they would be taken by a passing caravan.

Marcheshvan, VIIIth day.

“In a Cave at Horeb,

“Sinaitic Wilderness, Arabia.

“O my dear Rebecca!

“I would fain pour out my heart unto thee! Behold, my beloved sister, thou wilt have unwonted astonishment when this epistle reacheth thine hand, to know that thy hard-hearted but now contrite brother dwelleth in a cave in the land of Arabia. But thou wilt marvel yet more greatly, when I declare unto thee that I am a disciple of the New Faith. I, Saulus! so long exceeding mad against those of that Way, am a miracle unto myself! I well nigh feel my soul to be twain in one body,—the Old and the New; but I live and move, now and henceforth, in the New.

“It is meet that thou, my sister, companion and guardian of my tender years, shouldst now receive some acknowledgment of the abundance of thy gentle goodness and great patience to me-ward throughout my whole unrighteous course of life. While I persuaded myself through deceitful belief that I was faithful to the Chosen People, and even doing God service in my threatenings and slaughter among the saints of God, there was a Spirit giving utterance deep within my soul which never ceased to rebuke me. But I was stiff-necked, and would not listen to that Voice, which I now know to have been the judgment of the Most High. The Eternal Spirit was prone to touch my spirit, but in my blindness I would have none of it. In due season that inner reverberation became like the sound of thunder! I vainly strove to stop my ears and to drown its persuasion by scrupulous ceremonial service, and withal by persecuting all who were not of the straitest sect of the household of Israel.

“But why set before thee afresh those things which thou knowest too well, and which must needs only provoke my shame. From this day I leave them behind, and hold them no more in remembrance. Thou didst ever strive to guide my feet in the higher way, but in my pride and vainglory I despised thy counsel! Of all who abode in the house at the Sheepmarket, thou only didst discern some reflection of truth in the lives of the followers of the manifested Light!

“Honor to Serenus! I was hardened against that pure wisdom in him which thou didst so clearly perceive! Perfect contentment can never again possess me until I behold him face to face, yea, and sit at his feet, and learn more of that Spirit of Truth which so clearly shone through him, after the pattern of the Nazarene. The remembrance of his unfailing virtue will remain with me and yield inspiration. Hast thou any knowledge of his place of sojourn since I banished him from the Holy City? Moreover, hast thou heard any tidings from Amabel, the daughter of the Rabban, who departed from her father’s house, yea, and the Holy City also, for the sake of the New Faith?

“Regarding my own present state, I am persuaded that I have some beginnings of that Spirit which filled Jesus of Nazareth. I patiently wait that I may learn more of his life from those who were outwardly taught of him.

“The solitude of the wilderness, the joy of the Unseen Presence, and rest from the turmoil of the world and the differences of men, are my meat and drink. In due time they will heal the wounds of my repentant soul, and be manifested in new strength of body, howbeit a weakness yet remaineth with me. Peradventure it is a messenger to rebuke any spiritual pride that may beset me, and also that through its overcoming I may wax stronger in the inner man.

“If any disciples of the New Faith should journey so far as Tarsus, I beseech thee that thou be further taught of them. I also am minded that, by the goodness of thy life, thou wilt commend the Truth to our beloved father and mother.

“In the fulness of time I will return and be among men, that I may publish abroad the glad tidings of the new kingdom to all who will listen. Nothing can hinder me, and no enemies can stay my zeal in the work whereunto I am appointed. In the strength of God, and through the power of his might, I will give myself to the teaching of all nations.

“My faithful friend Amoz abideth with me, and the cave at Horeb is a goodly habitation. Behold it hath been hallowed by the Godly men and prophets of past generations, and their living but unseen presence yieldeth a benediction.

“I trust that in due season I may receive a letter of goodly size written by thine own hand.

“Some one of the caravans from Cæsarea that cross the desert of Ettyh Paran to the land of Midian will bring it nigh to Horeb.

“May the Spirit that filled the Nazarene be in and with thee!

“Peace and greetings to our father and mother!

“Saulus.”

The days that followed passed serenely with the two inmates of the cave. Saulus steadily gained in strength of body, and his vigor of soul also increased day by day. Often during the morning hours, with Amoz and the camel, he made short journeys in the adjacent region, generally returning by the sixth hour of the day to their wonted solitude.

Amoz felt a growing concern touching the experiences and plans of Saulus, whom he learned to love with a deep devotion, and to whose teaching he listened with gladness and profit. One evening an unwonted long silence succeeded the period of Saulus’s weakness, and Amoz was moved to inquire concerning the nature of his self-communing.

“O my dear friend and teacher, I would know the secret of thy meditations! Behold, when thou art silent with thine eyes closed, thy face almost seemeth to shine with joy! Tell me of thy thoughts! When I fain would rest my mind, it is full of troubled waves, and I find no peace.”

“Thy inquiry concerneth a great truth to which the eyes of the world are yet holden. It hath been made known to me through the working of my great tribulation. A little while aforetime my former bitterness and persecutions stood out before my soul by day and night. The thoughts of my innumerable transgressions scourged me without measure, and I knew of no escape. Vainly I strove to put them to flight, but their hellish faces of reproach gathered thick, and stared at me in season and out of season. Wherever I turned, my tormentors followed, and my soul was affrighted. But a new and higher way hath been revealed unto me. I fasten my meditation upon God,—the Omnipresent Good,—and upon everything that is true and beautiful and of good report, and behold the former things flee because they have no place!”

“Behold that is a path to freedom that I have not understood! My former life hath not been given to persecutions, but even those things that appear much smaller greatly disquiet me. Slumber forsaketh mine eyelids by reason of many things that seem against me. My soul is filled with manifold fears that have taken up their habitation in me and will not be removed. But thou hast given me much light, and filled me with hope. I thought it wise to hide these things from thee, but now rejoice that I have invited thy counsel. I will fasten my thoughts upon the Good and not the evil. But the way seemeth not easy, for the strong who possess a fortress will not be put out except by a stronger.”

“Thou judgest rightly. It is not a light thing, but patience will accomplish her perfect work and in due season be rewarded. Because all things rest in the bosom of God, Good is stronger than all else, yea, it is all! Behold we ignorantly magnify evil by our mistaken thoughts until it covereth everything! To the pure eye and the right thought adverse appearances become friendly. All things were created good, but man formeth them anew for himself by his thought. God is too pure to behold iniquity, because only he who hath in himself some measure of evil hath the perverted vision to recognize it.”

“Behold, O Saulus! thy wisdom leadeth into the light, and thou hast planted my feet upon a rock! I bless the day upon which I turned my steps into the wilderness with thee! By thy interpretation it well nigh appeareth that every man, through his own thoughts, shapeth to himself the whole world in which he dwelleth!”

“Thou speakest a hidden truth, which in the fulness of time will become plain, and thereby the kingdom of Heaven will be set up in all the earth! The world groaneth and travaileth through the fear of things that it hath recreated through its own vain imagining. As to unseemly fears, they abide not only with thee, but with all men. Because our fathers have feared God instead of loving and seeking him, they have filled the earth with trembling and weakness. Fear hath torment, and bringeth forth an all-prevailing harvest of pain and sorrow, and also sickness of mind and body! Our fathers at this very mountain did quake and tremble because they thought God, like a fretful man, was angry, and therefore sent a tempest of thunderings and lightnings. To give our souls to the dominion of things that are seen also bringeth us into subjection to evil. They are but outward appearances, while unseen verities abide forever.”

“I give judgment that thou hast learned all these things since thy departure from the Holy City?”

“Thou thinkest rightly! They came not from the traditions of men, nor the teaching of schools, but are revealed only from within!”

The next day Amoz made a visit to the halting-place of the caravans, and upon his return handed a sealed package to Saulus. It was a letter from Cassia, and ran as follows:—

“Jerusalem, Chisleu XVIth.

“O thou false-hearted Saulus!

“My hand well nigh refuseth to render me service!

“How hath the joy and desire of my heart turned to ashes!

“How proudly didst thou mount thy steed, and depart from the Holy City at the head of thy goodly company in the service of the Chosen People!

“How brave and valiant didst thou appear as thou turned thine eyes up to the casement of thy Cassia and waved a salutation, and then, in the lead of thy procession, wound thy way through the streets of the Holy City!

“And now thou dost send me a constrained epistle from a lonely cave in the wilderness, where with one base follower thou dost hide thy shamefacedness!

“Thou who didst chastise heretics and blasphemers, and pursue them from house to house, and take them to prison—fallen! so that they even put thee to disgrace!

“Thou! whose penetrating search after the followers of the Nazarene was like an eagle after his prey—THOU a Nazarene!

“I have mourned thee sore! Rumors came to me from Damascus, but I believed them not, and remained faithful to Saulus—the love of my heart!

“The night-watches have witnessed my weeping and desolation!

“I have clothed myself in sackcloth and mourned!

“My face is bowed in the dust, and my tongue cleaveth to the roof of my mouth!

“Behold the fountains of my tears have dried up!

“I have wandered in the streets of the Holy City, vainly hoping that I might see thy face!

“In my distress I have walked to and fro in my chamber, and anon gazed down through the casement—where thine eyes rested as thou departed—looking for thy return!

“Once I perceived something like a shadow of thy form, and felt thy breath upon my cheek, and a kiss out of the dim light seemed to rest upon me, but in all I was mocked!

“Was all thy former love and devotion but vain deceit, or hast thou gone mad? It hath been so reported, and I am constrained to believe it!

“Would that I had never seen thy face!

“I hold in contempt the love which thou dost now profess for me!

“Thou hast despised not me only, but my family and people and religion, and all which thou—when thou wert Saulus—rightly honored!

“My heart is bruised, my face blanched, and my form shrunken!

“I shall die! but many deaths would in no wise turn my heart in thy favor!

Cassia.”

The visage of Saulus as he read the missive to the end was pale but placid. Not a word escaped his lips, but with careful deliberation he slowly tore the delicate parchment into small pieces, and scattered them in one of the deep chasms of the cave.

* * * * * * * * * *

Often during a stormy evening, when the elements seem chaotic, and the gusty night wind sweeps the broken clouds or dark mist rapidly along, a brilliant star will burst into full view for a moment, and then disappear.

So down through the kaleidoscopic procession of the ages, at intervals some great soul shines out in full-orbed strength and beauty. The light of history reveals that these are they who have passed through tribulation.

The diamonds and other precious jewels owe their beauty to the intense fusing to which they have been subjected in the Plutonic blasts and glowing flames of Nature’s laboratory. The cruder natural settings in which they are clasped are baser, because they have never found their way into her crucible.

As the rough block of marble is chipped, broken, and seemingly almost destroyed before the imprisoned form of beauty can be set free, so the trip-hammers of Fate, whose terrible blows well nigh crush out the very life of their victim, by a strange paradox finally render him shapely beyond compare. The towering spirits that have worn material embodiment are those whose earthy cords, deemed so vital by the world, have, one by one, been snapped, until they found their life by losing it.

Saulus, the son of Benoni, was a casting from the furnace of such an order of development. Even the persecutions which had been waged by him doubtless had a place among the lurid flaming tongues which, in a white heat, contributed to the shaping of the new Saulus.

Cassia’s letter severed the last subtle cord which tethered him to the earthly. He was emancipated. Not, be it understood, that celibacy, asceticism, or other-worldliness are normal, or worthy to be sought, but that in the moral and spiritual economy of humanity, there are souls whose rounding and polishing come only through infinite travail.

But if the white flower of truth and spiritual attainment seem to blossom most perfectly when its roots have struck deep in the slimiest moral soil, let it not be forgotten that the viscous mass is not the cause, but only the occasion, of its supernal beauty. The divine germ hath all potency within itself; but it becometh expedient that it be plunged into low conditions, until through the exercise of lifting itself therefrom, it not only nourishes its own strength, but finally transforms its base environment.

On the evening of the day upon which Cassia’s letter had been received, the two friends felt an unwonted nearness and soul-contact. Saulus had said nothing of the contents of the message, but Amoz divined the whole matter as fully as if he had read it word for word. Though not greatly skilled in the learning of the schools, there was in him a simple spiritual sensitiveness which made everything plain. His life with Saulus had brought them into close touch, and he measurably reflected his leader’s experiences, and there was oneness in heart and interest.

Saulus was not cast down by Cassia’s unequivocal decision, but instead there came a consciousness of freedom and spiritual growth. A soul-burden had been lifted. His great regard for Cassia would in no wise be lost, but the special love which had possessed him was transformed into simple compassion. Barred as he was from any possibility of leading her into the light himself, she must wait for the slower education of event and experience.

The evening being cool, the two mused before a small fire, for the service of which the spacious cave afforded ample opportunity. The hour grew late, and they long had been sitting side by side, no word being spoken. Perfect harmony prevailed with a stillness that seemed mystical.

At length Amoz opened his lips, but his voice had a strange sound. Saulus turned and looked into his face. His eyes were closed, but not with sleep. There was a calm, sweet expression upon his countenance, but it was unfamiliar—plainly not that of Amoz. A slight tremor shook his frame, but only for a moment.

But harken! what saith the voice?

“Saulus, behold thou art my beloved brother!”

Saulus drew nearer, and warmly grasped the open hand which was extended towards him. While filled with wonder, there was nothing to disquiet him. He saw at a glance that some other soul possessed the body of his companion.

“The words of thy greeting are warm, and touch my heart, but I would know thy name, and why thou hast come to me?”

“I am Stephanos! aforetime of the Holy City. I come to manifest my love, and give thee words of encouragement!”

There flashed before the mind of Saulus the Holy City! the mob in the synagogue! the throng, which with jeers and curses, surged up the hill to the Sanhedrin! the mockery of the trial in the Hall of the Squares! the heroic young victim! the boiling passion! the tragedy without the walls! the angelic face! and—his own leadership!

“O my God! I cannot bear it!”

He bowed his face to the ground.

“Be of good cheer, O Saulus! I greet thee only with love!”

“O Stephanos! thou here! and thou lovest me! Am I not dreaming? Canst thou forgive?”

“I am here, and it is no delusive dream! From the beginning thou hast been forgiven, and my love abideth with thee! Forget all that is behind, and press forward, for behold great things wait for thee!”

Continuing the warm clasp of hands, they sat down, face to face.

“And thou art Stephanos! what joyful tidings! For a season my guilty soul had rest neither day nor night. But now thou hast confirmed the peace which hath been growing in me since my sojourn in the wilderness.”

“I have knowledge of thy good estate. Behold thy soul will become mighty, and thou will open the eyes of much people! I am but one of an unseen cloud of witnesses who will give thee strength and inspiration!”

“I am but newly born of the Spirit, and have much to learn. I fain would know how thou art employed, and how thou dost come to me?”

“Behold they, who while in the fleshly body ministered to the needs of their brethren, continue their ministry unbroken by the change of condition. There are manifold ways in which we of the Unseen move upon the minds of men which language would fail to express, and which thou couldst not now fully understand. Love lendeth us wings, and so far as the souls of men are open to the entrance of the truth, we are able to reflect some light to them. But the multitude are ignorantly closed! They count themselves to be fleshly in being, therefore the things of the Spirit are hidden from their eyes. They believe not in ministering spirits, neither care they for any understanding of the things of the higher life.”

“Do all who have passed thither engage in the ministry of love and good-will?”

“Nay! There is a great throng whom no man can number who have laid off the flesh, but who are yet entangled in the meshes of the fleshly mind! They are spirits who are in prison, and the loving guidance of the free spirits have much exercise in their release.”

“Hast thou a body and members when thou dost not possess the form of Amoz through which thou speakest to me?”

“Yea, verily! Our bodies, though lighter than air, as known to you, are vastly more substantial than the seen shadows which men count as themselves. It is only the invisible which has real being! The seen man is but an incidental manifestation of MAN!”

“I behold the beauty and truth of thy wisdom! Wilt thou not teach me further?”

“There are even more refined bodies than ours! When that which is perfect is come, behold we shall have laid off these for those that are still more internal and subtle! The path from glory to glory towards the perfect Love is ever away from the grosser in every degree. But that which is gross hath its place; for the seed of the divine life must needs have an early planting in coarse soil, that through the exercise of its growth back towards the Father’s House it may consciously recognize its quality, and interpret its real nature!”

“Is the other life very near to this?”

“There is but one life, but it hath many expressions. While in the flesh, the quality of thought and mind of each is closely veiled from others, but here the intent of the heart is openly manifest! The inner character standeth out, fully rounded, and none can mistake it! But in due time knowledge increaseth, and those who are lower are taught and inspired through the guidance of some who already have attained to greater power and glory.”

“It seemeth that all things work together for good.”

“Thou judgest rightly! We live in Spirit; for God is Spirit, and we have his image, whether in the flesh or out of it! But to live in the flesh is not to live of it!”

“I am much beholden to thee, for thou hast made many mysteries plain. And now hast thou any instructions which thou wouldst have me follow?”

“Nay. Take no man for authority, whether he be dwelling in the seen or the unseen! Men may aid and cheer and teach thee, but determination cometh from thy free will when illumined by the inner Word. Follow the divine leading within thee, and thou shalt have true freedom! Behold the Anointed Leader—the Christ—must be uncovered in every soul! My spoken words are at an end. Peace and joy abide with thee, and to Amoz blessing and good-will. Thanks be to him for the service which he hath rendered us.”

A mild sweet fragrance and light filled the cave, but soon all was as before.

CHAPTER XXVIII

LEANDER VISITS A MYSTIC SHRINE