Robert Falconer

‘Robert!’ said Mary, in a tone which, had he not been so eager after his end, he might have interpreted as one of displeasure.

‘Ye maun hearken till me, mem.—Whan I was oot at Bodyfauld,’ he began methodically, and Mary, bewildered, gave one hasty brush to her handful of hair and again stood still: she could imagine no connection between this meeting and their late parting—‘Whan I was was oot at Bodyfauld ae simmer, I grew acquant wi’ a bonnie lassie there, the dochter o’ Jeames Hewson, an honest cottar, wi’ Shakspeare an’ the Arabian Nichts upo’ a skelf i’ the hoose wi’ ‘im. I gaed in ae day whan I wasna weel; an’ she jist ministert to me, as nane ever did but yersel’, mem. An’ she was that kin’ an’ mither-like to the wee bit greitin’ bairnie ‘at she had to tak care o’ ‘cause her mither was oot wi’ the lave shearin’! Her face was jist like a simmer day, an’ weel I likit the luik o’ the lassie!—I met her again the nicht. Ye never saw sic a change. A white face, an’ nothing but greitin’ to come oot o’ her. She ran frae me as gin I had been the de’il himsel’. An’ the thocht o’ you, sae bonnie an’ straucht an’ gran’, cam ower me.’

Yielding to a masterful impulse, Robert did kneel now. As if sinner, and not mediator, he pressed the hem of her garment to his lips.

‘Dinna be angry at me, Miss St. John,’ he pleaded, ‘but be mercifu’ to the lassie. Wha’s to help her that can no more luik a man i’ the face, but the clear-e’ed lass that wad luik the sun himsel’ oot o’ the lift gin he daured to say a word against her. It’s ae woman that can uphaud anither. Ye ken what I mean, an’ I needna say mair.’

He rose and turned to leave the room.

Bewildered and doubtful, Miss St. John did not know what to answer, but felt that she must make some reply.

‘You haven’t told me where to find the girl, or what you want me to do with her.’

‘I’ll fin’ oot whaur she bides,’ he said, moving again towards the door.

‘But what am I to do with her, Robert?’

‘That’s your pairt. Ye maun fin’ oot what to do wi’ her. I canna tell ye that. But gin I was you, I wad gie her a kiss to begin wi’. She’s nane o’ yer brazen-faced hizzies, yon. A kiss wad be the savin’ o’ her.’

‘But you may be—. But I have nothing to go upon. She would resent my interference.’

‘She’s past resentin’ onything. She was gaein’ aboot the toon like ane o’ the deid ‘at hae naething to say to onybody, an’ naebody onything to say to them. Gin she gangs on like that she’ll no be alive lang.’

That night Jessie Hewson disappeared. A mile or two up the river under a high bank, from which the main current had receded, lay an awful, swampy place—full of reeds, except in the middle where was one round space full of dark water and mud. Near this Jessie Hewson was seen about an hour after Robert had thus pled for her with his angel.

The event made a deep impression upon Robert. The last time that he saw them, James and his wife were as cheerful as usual, and gave him a hearty welcome. Jessie was in service, and doing well, they said. The next time he opened the door of the cottage it was like the entrance to a haunted tomb. Not a smile was in the place. James’s cheeriness was all gone. He was sitting at the table with his head leaning on his hand. His Bible was open before him, but he was not reading a word. His wife was moving listlessly about. They looked just as Jessie had looked that night—as if they had died long ago, but somehow or other could not get into their graves and be at rest. The child Jessie had nursed with such care was toddling about, looking rueful with loss. George had gone to America, and the whole of that family’s joy had vanished from the earth.

The subject was not resumed between Miss St. John and Robert. The next time he saw her, he knew by her pale troubled face that she had heard the report that filled the town; and she knew by his silence that it had indeed reference to the same girl of whom he had spoken to her. The music would not go right that evening. Mary was distraite, and Robert was troubled. It was a week or two before there came a change. When the turn did come, over his being love rushed up like a spring-tide from the ocean of the Infinite.

He was accompanying her piano with his violin. He made blunders, and her playing was out of heart. They stopped as by consent, and a moment’s silence followed. All at once she broke out with something Robert had never heard before. He soon found that it was a fantasy upon Ericson’s poem. Ever through a troubled harmony ran a silver thread of melody from far away. It was the caverns drinking from the tempest overhead, the grasses growing under the snow, the stars making music with the dark, the streams filling the night with the sounds the day had quenched, the whispering call of the dreams left behind in ‘the fields of sleep,’—in a word, the central life pulsing in aeonian peace through the outer ephemeral storms. At length her voice took up the theme. The silvery thread became song, and through all the opposing, supporting harmonies she led it to the solution of a close in which the only sorrow was in the music itself, for its very life is an ‘endless ending.’ She found Robert kneeling by her side. As she turned from the instrument his head drooped over her knee. She laid her hand on his clustering curls, bethought herself, and left the room. Robert wandered out as in a dream. At midnight he found himself on a solitary hill-top, seated in the heather, with a few tiny fir-trees about him, and the sounds of a wind, ethereal as the stars overhead, flowing through their branches: he heard the sound of it, but it did not touch him.

Where was God?

In him and his question.

CHAPTER XX. ERICSON LOSES TO WIN

If Mary St. John had been an ordinary woman, and if, notwithstanding, Robert had been in love with her, he would have done very little in preparation for the coming session. But although she now possessed him, although at times he only knew himself as loving her, there was such a mountain air of calm about her, such an outgoing divinity of peace, such a largely moulded harmony of being, that he could not love her otherwise than grandly. For her sake, weary with loving her, he would yet turn to his work, and, to be worthy of her, or rather, for he never dreamed of being worthy of her, to be worthy of leave to love her, would forget her enough to lay hold of some abstract truth of lines, angles, or symbols. A strange way of being in love, reader? You think so? I would there were more love like it: the world would be centuries nearer its redemption if a millionth part of the love in it were of the sort. All I insist, however, on my reader’s believing is, that it showed, in a youth like Robert, not less but more love that he could go against love’s sweetness for the sake of love’s greatness. Literally, not figuratively, Robert would kiss the place where her foot had trod; but I know that once he rose from such a kiss ‘to trace the hyperbola by means of a string.’

It had been arranged between Ericson and Robert, in Miss Napier’s parlour, the old lady knitting beside, that Ericson should start, if possible, a week earlier than usual, and spend the difference with Robert at Rothieden. But then the old lady had opened her mouth and spoken. And I firmly believe, though little sign of tenderness passed between them, it was with an elder sister’s feeling for Letty’s admiration of the ‘lan’less laird,’ that she said as follows:—

‘Dinna ye think, Mr. Ericson, it wad be but fair to come to us neist time? Mistress Faukner, honest lady, an’ lang hae I kent her, ‘s no sae auld a frien’ to you, Mr. Ericson, as oorsel’s—nae offence to her, ye ken. A’body canna be frien’s to a’body, ane as lang ‘s anither, ye ken.’

‘’Deed I maun alloo, Miss Naper,’ interposed Robert, ‘it’s only fair. Ye see, Mr. Ericson, I cud see as muckle o’ ye almost, the tae way as the tither. Miss Naper maks me welcome as weel’s you.’

‘An’ I will mak ye welcome, Robert, as lang’s ye’re a gude lad, as ye are, and gang na efter—nae ill gait. But lat me hear o’ yer doin’ as sae mony young gentlemen do, espeacially whan they’re ta’en up by their rich relations, an’, public-hoose as this is, I’ll close the door o’ ‘t i’ yer face.’

‘Bless me, Miss Naper!’ said Robert, ‘what hae I dune to set ye at me that gait? Faith, I dinna ken what ye mean.’

‘Nae mair do I, laddie. I hae naething against ye whatever. Only ye see auld fowk luiks aheid, an’ wad fain be as sure o’ what’s to come as o’ what’s gane.’

‘Ye maun bide for that, I doobt,’ said Robert.

‘Laddie,’ retorted Miss Napier, ‘ye hae mair sense nor ye hae ony richt till. Haud the tongue o’ ye. Mr. Ericson ‘s to come here neist.’

And the old lady laughed such good humour into her stocking-sole, that the foot destined to wear it ought never to have been cold while it lasted. So it was then settled; and a week before Robert was to start for Aberdeen, Ericson walked into The Boar’s Head. Half-an-hour after that, Crookit Caumill was shown into the ga’le-room with the message to Maister Robert that Maister Ericson was come, and wanted to see him.

Robert pitched Hutton’s Mathematics into the grate, sprung to his feet, all but embraced Crookit Caumill on the spot, and was deterred only by the perturbed look the man wore. Crookit Caumill was a very human creature, and hadn’t a fault but the drink, Miss Napier said. And very little of that he would have had if she had been as active as she was willing.

‘What’s the maitter, Caumill?’ asked Robert, in considerable alarm.

‘Ow, naething, sir,’ returned Campbell.

‘What gars ye look like that, than?’ insisted Robert.

‘Ow, naething. But whan Miss Letty cried doon the close upo’ me, she had her awpron till her een, an’ I thocht something bude to be wrang; but I hadna the hert to speir.’

Robert darted to the door, and rushed to the inn, leaving Caumill describing iambi on the road behind him.

When he reached The Boar’s Head there was nobody to be seen. He darted up the stair to the room where he had first waited upon Ericson.

Three or four maids stood at the door. He asked no question, but went in, a dreadful fear at his heart. Two of the sisters and Dr. Gow stood by the bed.

Ericson lay upon it, clear-eyed, and still. His cheek was flushed. The doctor looked round as Robert entered.

‘Robert,’ he said, ‘you must keep your friend here quiet. He’s broken a blood-vessel—walked too much, I suppose. He’ll be all right soon, I hope; but we can’t be too careful. Keep him quiet—that’s the main thing. He mustn’t speak a word.’

So saying he took his leave.

Ericson held out his thin hand. Robert grasped it. Ericson’s lips moved as if he would speak.

‘Dinna speik, Mr. Ericson,’ said Miss Letty, whose tears were flowing unheeded down her cheeks, ‘dinna speik. We a’ ken what ye mean an’ what ye want wi’oot that.’

Then she turned to Robert, and said in a whisper,

‘Dr. Gow wadna hae ye sent for; but I kent weel eneuch ‘at he wad be a’ the quaieter gin ye war here. Jist gie a chap upo’ the flure gin ye want onything, an’ I’ll be wi’ ye in twa seconds.’

The sisters went away. Robert drew a chair beside the bed, and once more was nurse to his friend. The doctor had already bled him at the arm: such was the ordinary mode of treatment then.

Scarcely was he seated, when Ericson spoke—a smile flickering over his worn face.

‘Robert, my boy,’ he said.

‘Dinna speak,’ said Robert, in alarm; ‘dinna speak, Mr. Ericson.’

‘Nonsense,’ returned Ericson, feebly. ‘They’re making a work about nothing. I’ve done as much twenty times since I saw you last, and I’m not dead yet. But I think it’s coming.’

‘What’s coming?’ asked Robert, rising in alarm.

‘Nothing,’ answered Ericson, soothingly,—‘only death.—I should like to see Miss St. John once before I die. Do you think she would come and see me if I were really dying?’

‘I’m sure she wad. But gin ye speik like this, Miss Letty winna lat me come near ye, no to say her. Oh, Mr. Ericson! gin ye dee, I sanna care to live.’

Bethinking himself that such was not the way to keep Ericson quiet, he repressed his emotion, sat down behind the curtain, and was silent. Ericson fell fast asleep. Robert crept from the room, and telling Miss Letty that he would return presently, went to Miss St. John.

‘How can I go to Aberdeen without him?’ he thought as he walked down the street.

Neither was a guide to the other; but the questioning of two may give just the needful points by which the parallax of a truth may be gained.

‘Mr. Ericson’s here, Miss St. John,’ he said, the moment he was shown into her presence.

Her face flushed. Robert had never seen her look so beautiful.

‘He’s verra ill,’ he added.

Her face grew pale—very pale.

‘He asked if I thought you would go and see him—that is if he were going to die.’

A sunset flush, but faint as on the clouds of the east, rose over her pallor.

‘I will go at once,’ she said, rising.

‘Na, na,’ returned Robert, hastily. ‘It has to be manage. It’s no to be dune a’ in a hurry. For ae thing, there’s Dr. Gow says he maunna speak ae word; and for anither, there’s Miss Letty ‘ill jist be like a watch-dog to haud a’body oot ower frae ‘im. We maun bide oor time. But gin ye say ye’ll gang, that ‘ll content him i’ the meantime. I’ll tell him.’

‘I will go any moment,’ she said. ‘Is he very ill?’

‘I’m afraid he is. I doobt I’ll hae to gang to Aberdeen withoot him.’

A week after, though he was better, his going was out of the question. Robert wanted to stay with him, but he would not hear of it. He would follow in a week or so, he said, and Robert must start fair with the rest of the semies.

But all the removal he was ever able to bear was to the ‘red room,’ the best in the house, opening, as I have already mentioned, from an outside stair in the archway. They put up a great screen inside the door, and there the lan’less laird lay like a lord.

CHAPTER XXI. SHARGAR ASPIRES

Robert’s heart was dreary when he got on the box-seat of the mail-coach at Rothieden—it was yet drearier when he got down at The Royal Hotel in the street of Ben Accord—and it was dreariest of all when he turned his back on Ericson’s, and entered his own room at Mrs. Fyvie’s.

Shargar had met him at the coach. Robert had scarcely a word to say to him. And Shargar felt as dreary as Robert when he saw him sit down, and lay his head on the table without a word.

‘What’s the maitter wi’ ye, Robert?’ he faltered out at last. ‘Gin ye dinna speyk to me, I’ll cut my throat. I will, faith!’

‘Haud yer tongue wi’ yer nonsense, Shargar. Mr. Ericson’s deein’.’

‘O lord!’ said Shargar, and said nothing more for the space of ten minutes.

Then he spoke again—slowly and sententiously.

‘He hadna you to tak care o’ him, Robert. Whaur is he?’

‘At The Boar’s Heid.’

‘That’s weel. He’ll be luikit efter there.’

‘A body wad like to hae their ain han’ in ‘t, Shargar.’

‘Ay. I wiss we had him here again.’

The ice of trouble thus broken, the stream of talk flowed more freely.

‘Hoo are ye gettin’ on at the schule, man?’ asked Robert.

‘Nae that ill,’ answered Shargar. ‘I was at the heid o’ my class yesterday for five meenits.’

‘An’ hoo did ye like it?’

‘Man, it was fine. I thocht I was a gentleman a’ at ance.’

‘Haud ye at it, man,’ said Robert, as if from the heights of age and experience, ‘and maybe ye will be a gentleman some day.’

‘Is ‘t poassible, Robert? A crater like me grow intil a gentleman?’ said Shargar, with wide eyes.

‘What for no?’ returned Robert.

‘Eh, man!’ said Shargar.

He stood up, sat down again, and was silent.

‘For ae thing,’ resumed Robert, after a pause, during which he had been pondering upon the possibilities of Shargar’s future—‘for ae thing, I doobt whether Dr. Anderson wad hae ta’en ony fash aboot ye, gin he hadna thocht ye had the makin’ o’ a gentleman i’ ye.’

‘Eh, man!’ said Shargar.

He stood up again, sat down again, and was finally silent.

Next day Robert went to see Dr. Anderson, and told him about Ericson. The doctor shook his head, as doctors have done in such cases from Æsculapius downwards. Robert pressed no further questions.

‘Will he be taken care of where he is?’ asked the doctor.

‘Guid care o’,’ answered Robert.

‘Has he any money, do you think?’

‘I hae nae doobt he has some, for he’s been teachin’ a’ the summer. The like o’ him maun an’ will work whether they’re fit or no.’

‘Well, at all events, you write, Robert, and give him the hint that he’s not to fash himself about money, for I have more than he’ll want. And you may just take the hint yourself at the same time, Robert, my boy,’ he added in, if possible, a yet kinder tone.

Robert’s way of showing gratitude was the best way of all. He returned kindness with faith.

‘Gin I be in ony want, doctor, I’ll jist rin to ye at ance. An’ gin I want ower muckle ye maun jist say na.’

‘That’s a good fellow. You take things as a body means them.’

‘But hae ye naething ye wad like me to do for ye this session, sir?’

‘No. I won’t have you do anything but your own work. You have more to do than you had last year. Mind your work; and as often as you get tired over your books, shut them up and come to me. You may bring Shargar with you sometimes, but we must take care and not make too much of him all at once.’

‘Ay, ay, doctor. But he’s a fine crater, Shargar, an’ I dinna think he’ll be that easy to blaud. What do you think he’s turnin’ ower i’ that reid heid o’ his noo?’

‘I can’t tell that. But there’s something to come out of the red head, I do believe. What is he thinking of?’

‘Whether it be possible for him ever to be a gentleman. Noo I tak that for a good sign i’ the likes o’ him.’

‘No doubt of it. What did you say to him?’

‘I tellt him ‘at hoo I didna think ye wad hae ta’en sae muckle fash gin ye hadna had some houps o’ the kin’ aboot him.’

‘You said well. Tell him from me that I expect him to be a gentleman. And by the way, Robert, do try a little, as I think I said to you once before, to speak English. I don’t mean that you should give up Scotch, you know.’

‘Weel, sir, I hae been tryin’; but what am I to do whan ye speyk to me as gin ye war my ain father? I canna min’ upo’ a word o’ English whan ye do that.’

Dr. Anderson laughed, but his eyes glittered.

Robert found Shargar busy over his Latin version. With a ‘Weel, Shargar,’ he took his books and sat down. A few moments after, Shargar lifted his head, stared a while at Robert, and then said,

‘Duv you railly think it, Robert?’

‘Think what? What are ye haverin’ at, ye gowk?’

‘Duv ye think ‘at I ever could grow intil a gentleman?’

‘Dr. Anderson says he expecs ‘t o’ ye.’

‘Eh, man!’

A long pause followed, and Shargar spoke again.

‘Hoo am I to begin, Robert?’

‘Begin what?’

‘To be a gentleman.’

Robert scratched his head, like Brutus, and at length became oracular.

‘Speyk the truth,’ he said.

‘I’ll do that. But what aboot—my father?’

‘Naebody ‘ill cast up yer father to ye. Ye need hae nae fear o’ that.’

‘My mither, than?’ suggested Shargar, with hesitation.

‘Ye maun haud yer face to the fac’.’

‘Ay, ay. But gin they said onything, ye ken—aboot her.’

‘Gin ony man-body says a word agen yer mither, ye maun jist knock him doon upo’ the spot.’

‘But I michtna be able.’

‘Ye could try, ony gait.’

‘He micht knock me down, ye ken.’

‘Weel, gae doon than.’

‘Ay.’

This was all the instruction Robert ever gave Shargar in the duties of a gentleman. And I doubt whether Shargar sought further enlightenment by direct question of any one. He worked harder than ever; grew cleanly in his person, even to fastidiousness; tried to speak English; and a wonderful change gradually, but rapidly, passed over his outer man. He grew taller and stronger, and as he grew stronger, his legs grew straighter, till the defect of approximating knees, the consequence of hardship, all but vanished. His hair became darker, and the albino look less remarkable, though still he would remind one of a vegetable grown in a cellar.

Dr. Anderson thought it well that he should have another year at the grammar-school before going to college.—Robert now occupied Ericson’s room, and left his own to Shargar.

Robert heard every week from Miss St. John about Ericson. Her reports varied much; but on the whole he got a little better as the winter went on. She said that the good women at The Boar’s Head paid him every attention: she did not say that almost the only way to get him to eat was to carry him delicacies which she had prepared with her own hands.

She had soon overcome the jealousy with which Miss Letty regarded her interest in their guest, and before many days had passed she would walk into the archway and go up to his room without seeing any one, except the sister whom she generally found there. By what gradations their intimacy grew I cannot inform my reader, for on the events lying upon the boundary of my story, I have received very insufficient enlightenment; but the result it is easy to imagine. I have already hinted at an early disappointment of Miss St. John. She had grown greatly since, and her estimate of what she had lost had altered considerably in consequence. But the change was more rapid after she became acquainted with Ericson. She would most likely have found the young man she thought she was in love with in the days gone by a very commonplace person now. The heart which she had considered dead to the world had, even before that stormy night in the old house, begun to expostulate against its owner’s mistake, by asserting a fair indifference to that portion of its past history. And now, to her large nature the simplicity, the suffering, the patience, the imagination, the grand poverty of Ericson, were irresistibly attractive. Add to this that she became his nurse, and soon saw that he was not indifferent to her—and if she fell in love with him as only a full-grown woman can love, without Ericson’s lips saying anything that might not by Love’s jealousy be interpreted as only of grateful affection, why should she not?

And what of Marjory Lindsay? Ericson had not forgotten her. But the brightest star must grow pale as the sun draws near; and on Ericson there were two suns rising at once on the low sea-shore of life whereon he had been pacing up and down moodily for three-and-twenty years, listening evermore to the unprogressive rise and fall of the tidal waves, all talking of the eternal, all unable to reveal it—the sun of love and the sun of death. Mysie and he had never met. She pleased his imagination; she touched his heart with her helplessness; but she gave him no welcome to the shrine of her beauty: he loved through admiration and pity. He broke no faith to her; for he had never offered her any save in looks, and she had not accepted it. She was but a sickly plant grown in a hot-house. On his death-bed he found a woman a hiding-place from the wind, a covert from the tempest, the shadow of a great rock in a weary land! A strong she-angel with mighty wings, Mary St. John came behind him as he fainted out of life, tempered the burning heat of the Sun of Death, and laid him to sleep in the cool twilight of her glorious shadow. In the stead of trouble about a wilful, thoughtless girl, he found repose and protection and motherhood in a great-hearted woman.

For Ericson’s sake, Robert made some effort to preserve the acquaintance of Mr. Lindsay and his daughter. But he could hardly keep up a conversation with Mr. Lindsay, and Mysie showed herself utterly indifferent to him even in the way of common friendship. He told her of Ericson’s illness: she said she was sorry to hear it, and looked miles away. He could never get within a certain atmosphere of—what shall I call it? avertedness that surrounded her. She had always lived in a dream of unrealities; and the dream had almost devoured her life.

One evening Shargar was later than usual in coming home from the walk, or ramble rather, without which he never could settle down to his work. He knocked at Robert’s door.

‘Whaur do ye think I’ve been, Robert?’

‘Hoo suld I ken, Shargar?’ answered Robert, puzzling over a problem.

‘I’ve been haein’ a glaiss wi’ Jock Mitchell.’

‘Wha’s Jock Mitchell?’

‘My brither Sandy’s groom, as I tellt ye afore.’