Jack Hinton: The Guardsman

The Castle clock struck two. I started up, somewhat ashamed of myself at not having complied with O’Grady’s advice, and at once threw myself on my bed, and fell sound asleep. Some confused impression upon my mind of a threatened calamity gave a gloomy character to all my dreams, and more than once I awoke with a sudden start and looked about me. The flickering and uncertain glare of the dying embers threw strange goblin shapes upon the wall and on the old oak floor. The window-curtains waved mournfully to and fro, as the sighing night wind pierced the openings of the worn casements, adding, by some unknown sympathy, to my gloom and depression; and although I quickly rallied myself from these foolish fancies, and again sank into slumber, it was always again to wake with the same unpleasant impressions, and with the same sights and sounds about me. Towards morning, however, I fell into a deep, unbroken sleep, from which I was awakened by the noise of some one rudely drawing my curtains. I looked up, as I rubbed my eyes: it was Corny Delany, who, with a mahogany box under his arm, and a little bag in his hand, stood eyeing me with a look, in which his habitual ill-temper was dashed with a slight mixture of scorn and pity.

‘So you are awake at last!’ said he; ‘‘faith, and you sleep sound, and’ – this he muttered between his teeth – ‘and maybe it’s sounder you’ll sleep to-morrow night! The Captain bid me call you at seven o’clock, and it’s near eight now. That blaguard of a servant of yours wouldn’t get up to open the door till I made a cry of fire outside, and puffed a few mouthfuls of smoke through the keyhole!’

‘Well done, Corny! But where’s the Captain?’ ‘Where is he? Sorrow one o’me knows! Maybe at the watch-house, maybe in George’s Street barrack, maybe in the streets, maybe – Och, troth! there’s many a place he might be, and good enough for him any of them. Them’s the tools, well oiled; I put flints in them.’

‘And what have you got in the bag, Corny?’

‘Maybe you’ll see time enough. It’s the lint, the sticking-plaster and the bandages, and the turn-an’-twist.’ This, be it known, was the Delany for tourniquet. ‘And, ‘faith, it’s a queer use to put the same bag to; his honour the judge had it made to carry his notes in. Ugh, ugh, ugh! a bloody little bag it always was! Many’s the time I seen the poor craytures in the dock have to hould on by the spikes, when they’d see him put his hands in it! It’s not lucky, the same bag! Will you have some brandy-and-water, and a bit of dry toast? It’s what the Captain always gives them the first time they go out. When they’re used to it, a cup of chocolate with a spoonful of whisky is a fine thing for the hand.’

I could scarce restrain a smile at the notion of dieting a man for a duel, though, I confess, there seemed something excessively bloodthirsty about it. However, resolved to give Corny a favourable impression of my coolness, I said, ‘Let me have the chocolate and a couple of eggs.’

He gave a grin a demon might have envied, as he muttered to himself, ‘He wants to try and die game, ugh, ugh!’ With these words he waddled out of the room to prepare my breakfast, his alacrity certainly increased by the circumstance in which he was employed.

No sooner was I alone than I opened the pistol-case to examine the weapons. They were, doubtless, good ones; but a ruder, more ill-fashioned, clumsy pair it would be impossible to conceive. The stock, which extended nearly to the end of the barrel, was notched with grooves for the fingers to fit in, the whole terminating in an uncouth knob, inlaid with small pieces of silver, which at first I imagined were purely ornamental On looking closer, however, I perceived that each of them contained a name and a date, with an ominous phrase beneath, which ran thus: ‘Killed!‘or thus: ‘Wounded!’

‘Egad,’ thought I, ‘they are certainly the coolest people in the world in this island, and have the strangest notions withal of cheering a man’s courage!’

It was growing late, meanwhile; so that without further loss of time I sprang out of bed, and set about dressing, huddling my papers and Julia’s portrait into my writing-desk. I threw into the fire a few letters, and was looking about my room lest anything should have escaped me, when suddenly the quick movement of horses’ feet on the pavement beneath drew me to the window. As I looked out, I could just catch a glimpse of O’Grady’s figure as he sprang from a high tandem; I then heard his foot as he mounted the stairs, and the next moment he was knocking at my door. ‘Holloa!’ cried he, ‘by Jove, I have had a night of it! Help me off with the coat, Jack, and order breakfast, with any number of mutton-chops you please; I never felt so voracious in my life. Early rising must be a bad thing for the health, if it makes a man’s appetite so painful.’

While I was giving my necessary directions, O’Grady stirred up the fire, drew his chair close to it, and planting his feet upon the fender, and expanding his hands before the blaze, called out —

‘Yes, yes, quite right – cold ham and a devilled drumstick by all means; the mulled claret must have nothing but cloves and a slice of pine-apple in it; and, mind, don’t let them fry the kidneys in champagne; they are fifty times better in moselle: we’ll have the champagne au naturel, There, now, shut the door; there’s a confounded current of air comes up that cold staircase. So, come over, my boy; let me give you all the news, and to begin: —

‘After I parted with you, I went over to De Vere’s quarters, and heard that he had just changed his clothes and driven over to Clare Street. I followed immediately; but, as ill-luck would have it, he left that just five minutes before, with Watson of the Fifth, who lives in one of the hotels near. This, you know, looked like business; and, as they told me they were to be back in half an hour, I cut into a rubber of whist with Darcy and the rest of them, where, what between losing heavily, and waiting for those fellows, I never got up till half-past four; when I did, it was minus Paul’s cheque, all the loose cash about me, and a bill for one hundred and thirty to Vaughan. Pleasant, all that wasn’t it? Monk, who took my place, told me that Herbert and Watson were gone out together to the park, where I should certainly find them. Off, then, I set for the Phoenix, and, just as I was entering the gate of the Lodge, a chaise covered with portmanteaus and hat-boxes drove past me. I had just time to catch a glimpse of De Vere’s face as the light fell suddenly upon it; I turned as quickly as possible, and gave chase down Barrack Street. We flew, he leading, and I endeavouring to keep up; but my poor hack was so done up, between waiting at the club and the sharp drive, that I found we couldn’t keep up the pace. Fortunately, however, a string of coal-cars blocked up Essex Bridge, upon which my friend came to a check, and I also. I jumped out immediately, and running forward, just got up in the nick, as they were once more about to move forward, “Ah, Dudley,” cried I, “I ‘ve had a sharp run for it, but by good fortune have found you at last” I wish you had seen his face as I said these words; he leaned forward in the carriage, so as completely to prevent Watson, who was with him, overhearing what passed?

“May I ask,” said he, endeavouring to get up a little of his habitual coolness; “may I ask, what so very pressing has sent you in pursuit of me?”

‘“Nothing which should cause your present uneasiness,” replied I, in a tone and a look he could not mistake.

‘“Eh – aw! don’t take you exactly; anything gone wrong?”

‘“You ‘ve a capital memory, my lord, when it suits you; pray call it to your aid for a few moments, and it will save us both a deal of trouble. My business with you is on the part of Mr. Hinton, and I have to request you will, at once, refer me to a friend.”

‘“Eh! you want to fight? Is that it? I say, Watson, they want to make a quarrel out of that foolish affair I told you of.”

‘“Is Major Watson your friend on this occasion, my lord?”

‘“No; oh no; that is, I didn’t say – I told Watson how they walked into me for three hundred at Rooney’s. Must confess I deserved it richly for dining among such a set of fellows; and, as I have paid the money and cut the whole concern, I don’t see what more’s expected of me.”

‘“We have very little expectation, my lord, but a slight hope, that you’ll not disgrace the cloth you wear and the profession you follow.”

‘“I say, Watson, do you think I ought to take notice of these words?”

‘“Would your lordship like them stronger?”

‘“One moment, if you please, Captain O’Grady,” said Major Watson, as, opening the door of the chaise, he sprang out. “Lord Dudley de Vere has detailed to me, and of course correctly, the whole of his last night’s proceedings. He has expressed himself as ready and anxious to apologise to your friend for any offence he may have given him – in fact, that their families are in some way connected, and any falling out would be a very unhappy thing between them; and, last of all, Lord Dudley has resigned his appointment as aide-de-camp, and resolved on leaving Ireland; in two hours more he will sail from this. So I trust, that under every circumstance, you will see the propriety of not pressing the affair any further.”

‘“With the apology – ”

‘“That» of course,” said Watson.

‘“I say,” cried Herbert, “we shall be late at the Pigeon-house; it’s half-past seven.”

‘Watson whispered a few words into his ear; he was silent for a second, and a slight crimson flush settled on his cheek.

“‘It won’t do for me if they talk of this afterwards; but tell him – I mean Hinton – that I am sorry; that is, I wish him to forgive – ”

‘“There, there,” said I impatiently, “drive on! that is quite enough!”

‘The next moment the chaise was out of sight, and I leaned against the balustrade of the bridge, with a sick feeling at my heart I never felt before. Vaughan came by at the moment with his tandem, so I made him turn about and set me down; and here I am, my boy, now that my qualmishness has passed off, ready to eat you out of house and home, if the means would only present themselves.’

Here ended O’Gradys narrative, and as breakfast very shortly after made its appearance, our conversation dropped into broken, disjointed sentences; the burden of which, on his part, was that, although no man would deserve more gratitude from the household and the garrison generally than myself for being the means of exporting Lord De Vere, yet that under every view of the case all effort should be made to prevent publicity, and stop the current of scandal such an event was calculated to give rise to in the city.

‘No fear of that, I hope,’ said I.

‘Every fear, my dear boy. We live in a village here: every man hears his friend’s watch tick, and every lady knows what her neighbour paid for her paste diamonds. However, be comforted! your reputation will scarcely stretch across the Channel; and one’s notoriety must have strong claims before it pass the custom-house at Liverpool.’

‘Well, that is something; but hang it, O’Grady, I wish I had had a shot at him.’

‘Of course you do: nothing more natural, and at the same time, if you care for the lady, nothing more mal à propos. Do what you will, her name will be mixed up in the matter; but had it gone further she must have been deeply compromised between you. You are too young, Jack, to understand much of this; but take my word for it – fight about your sister, your aunt, your maternal grandmother, if you like, but never for the girl you are about to marry. It involves a false position to both her and yourself. And now that I am giving advice, just give me another cutlet. I say, Corny, any hot potatoes?’

‘Thim was hot awhile ago,’ said Corny, without taking his hands from his pockets.

‘Well, it is pleasant to know even that. Put that pistol-case back again. Ah! there goes Vaughan; I want a word with him.’

So saying, he sprang up, and hastened downstairs.

‘What did he say I was to do with the pistols?’ said Corny, as he polished the case with the ample cuff of his coat.

‘You are to put them by: we shan’t want them this morning.’

‘And there is to be no devil after all,’ said he with a most fiendish grin. ‘Ugh, ugh! didn’t I know it? Ye’s come from the wrong side of the water for that. It’s little powder ye blaze, for all your talking.’

Taking out one of the pistols as he spoke, he examined the lock for a few minutes patiently, and then muttered to himself: ‘Wasn’t I right to put in the ould flints? The devil a more ye ‘d he doing I guessed nor making a flash in the pan!’

It was rather difficult, even with every allowance for Mr. Delany’s temper, to submit to his insolence patiently. After all, there was nothing better to be done; for Corny was even greater in reply than attack, and any rejoinder on my part would unquestionably have made me fare the worse. Endeavouring, therefore, to hum a tune, I strolled to the window and looked out; while the imperturbable Corny, opening the opposite sash, squibbed off both pistols previous to replacing them in the box.

I cannot say what it was in the gesture and the action of this little fiend; but somehow the air of absurdity thus thrown over our quarrel by this ludicrous termination hurt me deeply; and Corny’s face as he snapped the trigger was a direct insult. All my self-respect, all my self-approval gave way in a moment, and I could think of nothing but cross Corny’s commentary on my courage.

‘Yes,’ said I, half aloud, ‘it is a confounded country! If for nothing else, that every class and condition of man thinks himself capable to pronounce upon his neighbour. Hard drink and duelling are the national pénates; and Heaven help him who does not adopt the religion of the land! My English servant would as soon have thought of criticising a chorus of Euripides as my conduct; and yet this little wretch not only does so, but does it to my face, superadding a sneer upon my country!’

This, like many other of my early reflections on Ireland, had its grain of truth and its bushel of fallacy; and before I quitted the land I learned to make the distinction.

CHAPTER XIV. THE PARTING

From motives of delicacy towards Miss Bellew I did not call that day at the Rooneys. For many months such an omission on my part had never occurred. Accordingly, when O’Grady returned at night to the Castle, he laughingly told me that the house was in half-mourning. Paul sat moodily over his wine, scarce lifting his head, and looking what he himself called nonsuited. Mrs. Paul, whose grief was always in the active mood, sobbed, hiccupped, gulped, and waved her arms as if she had lost a near relative. Miss Bellew did not appear at all, and Phil discovered that she had written home that morning, requesting her father to send for her without loss of time.

‘The affair, as you see,’ continued O’Grady, ‘has turned out ill for all parties. Dudley has lost his post, you your mistress, and I my money – a pretty good illustration how much mischief a mere fool can at any moment make in society.’

It was about four o’clock in the afternoon when I mounted my horse to ride over to Stephen’s Green. As I passed slowly along Dame Street my attention was called to a large placard, which, in front of a house opposite the lower Castle gate, had attracted a considerable crowd around it. I was spared the necessity of stopping to read by the hoarse shout of a ragged ruffian who elbowed his way through the mob, carrying on one arm a mass of printed handbills; the other hand he held beside his mouth to aid the energy of his declamation. ‘Here’s the full and true account,’ cried he, ‘of the bloody and me-lan-chc-ly duel that tuk place yesterday morning in the Phaynix Park, between Lord Dudley de Vere and Mr. Hinton, two edge-du-congs to his Grace the Lord Liftinint, wid all the particulars, for one ha’penny.’

‘Here’s the whole correspondence between the Castle bucks,’ shouted a rival publisher – the Colburn to this Bentley – ‘wid a beautiful new song to an old tune —

“Bang it up, bang it up, to the lady in the Green.”’

‘Give me one, if you please,’ said a motherly-looking woman, in a grey cloak.

‘No, ma’am, a penny,’ responded the vendor. ‘The bloody fight for a halfpenny! What!’ said he; ‘would you have an Irish melody and the picture of an illigint female for a copper?’

‘Sing us the song, Peter,’ called out another.

‘This is too bad!’ said I passionately, as, driving the spurs into my horse, I dashed through the ragged mob, upsetting and overturning all before me. Not, however, before I was recognised; and, as I cantered down the street, a shout of derision, and a hailstorm of offensive epithets followed me.

It was, I confess, some time before I recovered my equanimity enough to think of my visit. For myself, individually, I cared little or nothing; but who could tell in what form these things might reach my friends in England? – how garbled! how exaggerated! how totally perverted! And then, too, Miss Bellew! It was evident that she was alluded to. I trembled to think that her name, polluted by the lips of such wretches as these, should be cried through the dark alleys and purlieus of the capital; a scoff and a mockery among the very outcasts of vice.

As I turned the corner of Grafton Street a showy carriage with four grey horses passed me by. I knew it was the Rooney equipage, and although for a moment I was chagrined that the object of my visit was defeated, on second thoughts I satisfied myself that, perhaps, it was quite as well; so I rode on to leave my card. On reaching the door, from which already some visitors were turning away, I discovered that I had forgotten my ticket-case; so I dismounted to write my name in the visiting-book; for this observance among great people Mrs. Rooney had borrowed, to the manifest horror and dismay of many respectable citizens.

‘A note for you, sir,’ said the butler, in his most silvery accent, as he placed a small sealed billet in my hand.

I opened it hastily. It contained but two lines:

‘Miss Bellew requests Mr. Hinton will kindly favour her with a few moments’ conversation at an early opportunity.’

‘Is Miss Bellew at home?’

‘Yes, sir,’ said the servant, who stood waiting to precede me upstairs, and announce me.

‘Mr. Hinton,’ said the man; and the words echoed in the empty drawing-room, as he closed the door behind me. The next moment I heard the rustle of a silk dress, and Miss Bellew came out of the boudoir and walked towards me. Contrary to her usual habit – which was to hold out her hand to me – she now came timidly, hesitatingly forward, her eyes downcast, and her whole air and appearance indicating, not only the traces of sorrow, but of physical suffering.

‘Mr. Hinton,’ said she, in a voice every accent of which vibrated on my heart, ‘I have taken the liberty to ask a few moments’ interview with you; for, although it is not only probable, but almost certain, we shall not meet again, yet I wish to explain certain portions of my conduct, and, indeed, to make them the reason of a favour I have to ask at your hands.’

‘Permit me to interrupt you for a moment,’ said I. ‘It is evident how painful the matter you would speak of is to you; you have no need of explanation, least of all to me. By accident, I overheard that which, however high my esteem for Miss Bellew before, could but elevate her in my eyes. Pass then at once, I beseech you, to what you call a favour; there is no service you can seek for – ’

‘I thank you,’ replied she, in a voice scarcely articulate; ‘you have, indeed, spared me much in not asking me to speak of what it is misery enough to remember. But it is not the first time my unprotected position in this house has exposed me to outrage: though assuredly it shall be the last.’ The tone of indignation she spoke in supplied her with energy, as she hurriedly continued: ‘Already, Mr. Hinton, persons have dared to build a scandal upon the frail foundation of this insolent wager. Your name has been mixed up with it in such a way that no possible intercourse could exist between us without being construed into evidence of a falsehood; therefore, I have made up my mind to ask you to discontinue your visits here, for the few days I may yet remain. I have already written home; the answer may arrive the day after to-morrow; and, while I feel that I but ill repay the hospitality and kindness I have received, and have met with, in closing the door to a most valued guest, I am assured you will understand and approve my motives, and not refuse me my request.’

Delighted at the prospect of being in some way engaged in a service, I had listened with a throbbing heart, up to the moment she concluded. Nothing could so completely overthrow all my hopes as these last few words. Seeing my silence and my confusion – for I knew not what to say – she added, in a slightly tremulous voice —

‘I am sorry, Mr. Hinton, that my little knowledge of the world should have led me into this indiscretion. I perceive from your manner that I have asked a sacrifice you are unwilling to make. I ought to have known that habits have their influence, as well as inclinations; and that this house, being the resort of your friends – ’

‘Oh, how much, how cruelly you have mistaken me! Not on this account, not for such reasons as you suppose did I hesitate in my reply; far from it. Indeed, the very cause which made me a frequent visitor of this house, is that which now renders me unable to answer you.’ A slight flush upon her cheek and a tremulous motion of her lip, prevented my adding more. ‘Fear not, Miss Bellew,’ said I, ‘fear not from me; however different the feeling that would prompt it, no speech of mine shall cause you pain to listen to, however the buried thought may rack my own bosom. You shall have your request; good-bye.’

‘Nay, nay, not so,’ said she, as she raised her handkerchief to her eyes, and gave a soft but sickly smile; ‘you mustn’t go without my thanking you for all your kindness. It may so chance that one day or other you will visit the wild west; if so, pray don’t forget that my father, of whom you have heard me speak so much, would be but too happy to thank one who has been so kind to his daughter. And, if that day should come’ – here a slight gleam of animation shot across her features – ’ I beseech you not to think, from what you will see of me there, that I have forgotten all your good teaching, and all your lessons about London manners, though I sadly fear that neither my dress nor deportment will testify in my favour; and so, good-bye.’

She drew her glove from her hand as she spoke. I raised the taper fingers, respectfully, to my lips, and, without venturing another look, muttered ‘good-bye,’ and left the room.

As step by step I loitered on the stairs, I struggled with myself against the rising temptation to hurry back to her presence, and tell her that, although hitherto the fancied security of meeting her every day had made me a stranger to my own emotions, the hour of parting had dispelled the illusion; the thought of separation had unveiled the depth of my heart, and told me that I loved her. Was this true?

CHAPTER XV. THE LETTER FROM HOME

Feigning illness to O’Grady as the reason of my not going to the Rooneys, I kept my quarters for several days, during which time it required all my resolution to enable me to keep my promise; and scarcely an hour of the day went over without my feeling tempted to mount my horse and try if, perchance, I could not catch even a passing look at her once more. Miss Bellew was the first woman who had ever treated me as a man; this, in itself, had a strong hold on my feelings; for after all, what flattery is there so artful as that which invests us with a character to which we feel in our hearts our pretension is doubtful? Why has college life, why has the army, such a claim upon our gratitude at our outset in the world? Is it not the acknowledgment of our manhood? And for the same reason the man who first accepts our bill, and the woman who first receives our addresses, have an unqualified right to our regard for evermore.

It is the sense of what we seem to others that moulds and fashions us through life; and how many a character that seems graven in letters of adamant took its type, after all, from some chance or casual circumstance, some passing remark, some hazarded expression! We begin by simulating a part, and we end by dovetailing it into our nature; thence the change which a first passion works in every young mind. The ambition to be loved and the desire to win affection teach us those ways of pleasing, which, whether real or affected, become part and parcel of ourselves. Little know we that in the passion we believe to be the most disinterested how much of pure egoism is mixed up; and well is it for us that such is the case. The imaginary standard we set up before ourselves is a goal to strive for, an object of high hope before us; and few, if any, of our bolder enterprises in after-life have not their birth in the cradle of first love. The accolade, that in olden days by its magic touch converted the humble squire into the spurred and belted knight, had no such charm as the first beam from a bright eye, when, falling upon the hidden depths of our heart, it has shown us a mine of rich thoughts, of dazzling hopes, of bright desires. This indeed is a change; and who is there, having felt it, has not walked forth a prouder and a nobler spirit?