The Devil in Britain and America

‘Octob. 29. Their businesse having now received so much forwardnesse, as to be neer dispatcht, they encouraged one the other, and resolved to try further, therefore they provided more lights and fires, and further, for their assistance, prevailed with their Ordinary Keeper to lodge amongst them, and bring his Mastive Bitch, and it was so this night with them, that they had no disturbance at all.

‘Octob. 30. So well had they past the night before, that this night they went to bed confident and carelesse, untill, about 12 of the clock, something knockt at the door as with a smith’s great hammer, but with such force as if it had cleft the door; then entred something like a Bear, but seem’d to swell more big and walkt about the room, and out of one room into the other; treading so heavily, as the floore had not been strong enough to bear it; when it came to the bed chamber, it dasht against the beds heads some kind of glasse vessell, that broke in sundry pieces; and, sometimes, it would take up those pieces, and hurle them about the room, and into the other room; and when it did not hurle the glasse at their heads, it did strike upon the tables as if many smiths, with their greatest hammers, had been laying on as upon an anvill: sometimes it thumpt against the walls, as if it would beat a hole through; then upon their heads such stamping, as if the roof of the house were beating down upon their heads, and, having done thus during the space (as was conjectured) of two hours, it ceased and vanished, but with a more fierce shutting of the doors than at any time before. In the morning they found the pieces of glass about the room, and observed that it was much differing from that glasse, brought in three nights before, this being of a much thicker substance, which severall persons which came in carried away some pieces of. The Commissioners were in debate of lodging there no more, but all their businesse was not done, and some of them were so conceited as to believe, and to attribute the rest they enjoyed the night before this last unto the Mastive bitch; wherefore they resolved to get more company, and the Mastive bitch, and try another night.

‘Octob. 31. This night, the fires and lights prepared, the Ordinary Keeper and his bitch, with another man persuaded by him, they all took their beds, and fell asleep. But, about 12 at night, such rapping was on all sides of them, that it wakened all of them. As the doors did seem to open, the Mastive bitch fell fearfully a yelling, and presently ran fiercely into the bed to them in the truckle bed. As the thing came by the table, it struck so fierce a blow on that, as that it made the frame to crack; then took the warming pan from off the table and stroke it against the walls with so much force as that it was beat flat together, lid and bottom; now were they hit as they lay covered over head and ears within the bedclothes; Captain Carelesse was taken a sound blow on the head with the shoulder blade-bone of a dead Horse (before, they had been but thrown at when they peept up, and mist,) Brown had a shrewd blow on the leg with the back bone, and another on the head; and everyone of them felt severall blows of bones and stones through the bed clothes, for now these things were thrown as from an angry hand that meant further mischief; the stones flew in at the window as if shot out of a Gun, nor was the bursts lesse (as from without) than of a Cannon, and all the windows broken down. Now, as the hurling of the things did cease, and the thing walkt up and down, Captains Cockaine and Hart cried out, In the Name of the Father, Son and Holy Ghost, What are you? what would you have? what have we done that you disturb us thus? No voice replied (as the Captains said, yet some of their servants have said otherwise) and the noise ceast. Hereupon Captains Hart and Cockaine rose, who lay in the Bed-chamber, renewed the fire and lights, and one great candle in a candlestick they placed in the door, that might be seen by them in both the rooms; no sooner were they got to bed, but the noise arose on all sides more loud and hideous than at any time before, in so much (as to use the Captain’s own words) it returned and brought seven Devils worse than itself; and, presently, they saw the candle and candlestick in the passage of the door, dasht up to the roof of the room, by a kick of the hinder parts of a Horse, and after, with the Hoof trod out the snuffe, and so dasht out the Fire in the Chimnies. As this was done, there fell, as from the sieling, upon them in the Truckle beds, such quantities of water, as if it had been poured out of Buckets, which stunk worse than any earthly stink could make. And, as this was in doing, something crept under the High Beds, tost them up to the roof of the House, with the Commissioners in them, until the Testers of the Beds were beaten down upon them, and the Bedsted-frames broke under them. And here, some pause being made, they all, as if with one consent, started up, and ran down the stairs until they came into the Counsel-Hall, where two sate up a Brewing, but were now fallen asleep; those they scared much with wakening of them, having been much perplext before with the strange noise, which commonly was taken by them abroad for thunder, sometimes for rumbling wind; here the Captains and their company got fire and candle, and everyone carrying something of either, they returned into the Presence-Chamber, where some applied themselves to make the fire, whilst others fell to Prayers, and, having got some clothes about them, they spent the residue of the night in singing Psalms and Prayers; during which, no noise was in that room, but most hideously round about, as at some distance.

‘It should have been told before, how that when Captain Hare first rose this night (who lay in the Bed-Chamber next the fire) he found their Book of valuations crosse the embers smoaking, which he snacht up, and cast upon the Table there, which, the night before, was left upon the Table in the presence, amongst their other papers. This Book was, in the morning, found a handful burnt, and had burnt the Table where it lay; Brown the Clerk said, he would not for a 100 and a 100l. that it had been burnt a handful further.

‘This night it happened that there were six Cony-stealers, who were come with their Nets and Ferrets to the Cony-burrows by Rosamond’s Well, but with the noise this night from the Mannor-house, they were so terrified, that, like men distracted, away they ran, and left their Haies all ready pitched, ready up, and the Ferrets in the Cony-burrows.

‘Now the Commissioners, more sensible of their danger, considered more seriously of their safety, and agreed to go and confer with Mr. Hoffman, the Minister of Wotton (a man not of the meanest note for life or learning, by some esteemed more high) to desire his advice, together with his company and prayers. Mr. Hoffman held it too high a point to resolve on suddenly and by himself, wherefore, desired time to consider upon it, which, being agreed unto, he forthwith rode to Mr. Jenkinson and Mr. Wheat, the two next Justices of Peace, to try what Warrant they could give him for it. They both (as ’tis said from themselves) encouraged him to be assisting to the Commissioners, according to his calling.

By which it is to be noted that a Presbyterian Minister dares not encounter an Independent Devil

‘But certain it is, that when they came to fetch him to go with them, Mr. Hoffman answered, That he would not lodge there one night, for £500, and being askt to pray with them, he held up his hands, and said, That he would not meddle upon any terms.

‘Mr. Hoffman refusing to undertake the quarrel, the Commissioners held it not safe to lodge where they had been thus entertained, any longer, but caused all things to be removed into the Chambers over the Gatehouse, where they staid but one night, and what rest they enjoyed there, we have but an uncertain relation of, for they went away early the next morning; but if it may be held fit to set down what hath been delivered by the report of others, they were also the same night much affrighted with dreadful apparitions; but, observing that these passages spread much in discourse, to be also in particulars taken notice of, and that the nature of it made not for their cause, they agreed to the concealing of the things for the future; yet this is well known and certain, that the Gate-keeper’s wife was in so strange an agony in her bed, and in her bed-chamber such noise (whilst her husband was above with the Commissioners) that two maids in the next room to her durst not venture to assist her, but, affrighted, ran out to call company, and their Master, and found the woman (at their coming in) gasping for breath: and the next day said that she saw and suffered that, which, for all the world, she would not be hired to again.

From Woodstock the Commissioners removed unto Euelme, and some of them returned to Woodstock, the Sunday sennight after (the Book of Valuations wanting something that was, for haste, left imperfect), but lodged not in any of those rooms where they had lain before, and yet were not unvisited (as they confess themselves) by the Devil, whom they called their nightly guest. Captain Crooke came not untill Tuesday night, and how he sped that night, the gate-keeper’s wife can tell, if she dareth; but, what she hath whispered to her gossips, shall not be made a part of this our Narrative, nor any more particulars which have fallen from the Commissioners themselves, and their servants to other persons; they are all, or most of them alive, and may add to it when they please, and, surely, have not a better way to be revenged of him who troubled them, than according to the Proverb, tell truth and shame the Devil.

There remains this observation to be added, that on a Wednesday morning, all these Officers went away; And that, since then, diverse persons of severall qualities, have lodged often and sometimes long in the same rooms both in the presence, withdrawing room and bed Chamber belonging unto his Sacred Majesty, yet none have had the least disturbance, or heard the smallest noise, for which the cause was not as ordinary, as apparent; except the Commissioners and their company, who came in order to the alienating and pulling down the house, which is well nigh performed.’

As to the authenticity of the above, we are told in the Preface: ‘And now, as to the Penman of this Narrative, know that he was a Divine, and, at the time of those things acted, which are here related, the Minister and Schoolmaster of Woodstock, a person learned and discreet, nor byassed with factious humours, his name Widows, who, each day, put in writing what he heard from their mouthes, (and such things as they told to have befallen them the night before), therein keeping to their own words.’

There was also a metrical account6 of these strange doings, printed in the year in which they occurred; but although it exactly tallies with the prose as above, it is not written in so refined a strain.

The British Magazine for April, 1747 (vol. ii., p. 156) professes to give ‘The genuine history of the good devil of Woodstock, famous in the world in the year 1649, and never accounted for, or at all understood to this time.’ It is by an anonymous writer, who says he found it in some original papers which had lately fallen into his hands, ‘under the name of authentick memoirs of the memorable Joseph Collins of Oxford, commonly known by the name of funny Joe,’ and it puts forth that this said Joe, under the name of Giles Sharp, entered the service of the Commissioners as a servant, and with the help of two friends, an unknown trap-door in the ceiling of the bedchamber, and some fulminating mercury, played the part of the Devil; but as the document is not known to be in existence, and is only mentioned in the pages of a magazine a hundred years afterwards, the reader may attach whatever credit he pleases to it. At all events, it proves that something very extraordinary, according to popular rumour, did take place at Woodstock during the Commissioners’ occupation.

CHAPTER IV

‘The Dæmon of Tedworth.’‘THE DÆMON OF TEDWORTH.7

‘Master John Mompesson, of Tedworth in Wiltshire, being about the middle of March, in the year 1661, at a neighbouring Town, called Ludgarshal, heard a Drum beat there, and being concerned as a Commission Officer in the Militia, he enquired of the Bayliffe of the Town, at whose House he then was, what it meant. The Bayliffe told him that they had for some dayes been troubled by that Idle Drummer, who demanded money of the Constable, by virtue of a pretended pass, which he thought was counterfeit. Upon this Information Master Mompesson sent for the fellow, and ask’d him by what Authority he went up and down the Countrey in that manner, demanding money, and keeping a clutter with his Drum? The Drummer answered he had good Authority, and produced his pass, with a warrant under the hands of Sir William Cawly and Colonel Ayliffe of Gretenham. These papers discover’d the knavery, for M. Mompesson knowing those Gentlemen’s hands, found that his pass and warrant were forgeries; and upon the discovery, commanded the vagrant to put off his Drum, and charged the Constable to carry him to the next Justice of Peace, to punish him according to the desert of his Insolence and Roguery. The fellow then confest the cheat, and begg’d earnestly for his Drum. But M. Mompesson told him that if he understood from Colonel Ayliffe, whose Drummer he pretended to be, that he had been an honest man, he should have it again; but in the interim he would secure it. So he left the Drum with the Bayliffe, and the Drummer in the Constable’s hands; who, it seems, after, upon intreaty, let him go.

‘About the midst of April following, when M. M. was preparing for a Journey to London, the Bayliffe sent the Drum to his house; and, being returned, his wife told him that they had been much affrighted in the night by Thieves, during his absence; and that the House had like to have been broken up. He had not been at home above three nights, when the same noise returned that had disturbed his Family when he was abroad. It was a very great knocking at his Doors, and the out side of his House. M. M. arose, and with a brace of Pistols in his hands, went up and down searching for the cause of the Disturbance. He open’d the door, where the great knocking was, and presently the noise was at another. He opened that also, and went forth, rounding his House, but could discover nothing; only he still heard a strange noise and hollow sound; but could not perceive what was the occasion of it. When he was returned to his Bed, the noise was a Thumping and Drumming on the top of his House, which continued a good space, and then by degrees went off into the Air.

‘After this It would come 5 nights together, and absent itself 3. Knocking very hard at the out-sides of the House, which is most of it, of Board. This It did, constantly, as they were going to sleep, either early or late. After a month’s racket without, It came into the room where the Drum lay, where It would be 4 or 5 nights in 7, making great hollow sounds, and sensibly shaking the Beds and Windows. It would come within half an hour after they were in Bed, and stay almost two. The sign of Its approach was an hurling in the Air over the House; and at Its recess they should hear a Drum beat, like the breaking up of a Guard. It continued in this Room for the space of two months; the Gentleman himself lying there to observe It: and though It was very troublesome in the fore part of the night, yet, after two hours disturbance, It would desist, and leave all in quietness: At which time perhaps the Laws of the Black Society required Its presence at the general Rendezvous elsewhere.

‘About this time the Gentleman’s Wife was brought to Bed; the noise came a little that night she was in Travail, but then forbore for three weeks till she had recover’d strength. After this civil cessation, it return’d in a ruder manner than before, applying wholly to the younger children; whose Bedsteads It would beat with that violence that all present would expect, when they would fall in pieces. Those that laid their hands upon them, could feel no blows, but perceived them to shake exceedingly. It would for an hour together beat, what they Call Roundheads and Cuckolds – the Tattoo, and several other Points of Warre, and that as dextrously as any Drummer. After which It would get under the Bed, and scratch there as if It had Iron Tallons. It would lift the children up in their Beds, follow them from one room to another; and, for a while, applied to none particularly but them.

‘There was a Cock-loft in the House which had been observed hitherto to be untroubled; thither they removed their children, putting them to bed while it was fair day: and yet they were no sooner covered, but the unwelcome Visitant was come, and played his tricks as before.

‘On the 5th of Novemb. 1662. It kept a mighty noise, and one of the Gentleman’s Servants observing two Boards in the children’s room that seemed to move, he bade It give him one of them, and presently the Board came within a yard of him. The Fellow added, Nay, let me have it in my hand: upon which it was shuft quite home. The man thrust it back, and the Dæmon returned it to him, and so from one to another at least 20 times together, till the Gentleman forbad his servant such Familiarities. That morning It left a Sulphurous smell behind It, very displeasant and offensive… At night the Minister of the place, Mr. Cragge, and many of the Neighbours came to the House – and went to prayer at the Children’s Bed-side, where, at that time It was very troublesome and loud. During the time of Prayer It with-drew into the Cock-Loft, but, the Service being ended, It returned; and in the sight and presence of the company, the Chairs walked about the Room, the Children’s Shooes were thrown over their heads, and every loose thing moved about the Chamber; also a Bed staffe was thrown at the Minister, which hit him on the Leg, but so favourably, that a lock of Wooll could not have fallen more softly. And a circumstance more was observed, viz., that it never in the least roul’d, nor mov’d from the place where it lighted.

‘The Gentleman perceiving that It so much persecuted the little Children, lodg’d them out at a Neighbour’s House, and took his eldest daughter, who was about 10 years of Age, into his own Chamber, where It had not been in a month before. But no sooner was she in Bed, but the troublesome Guest was with her, and continued his unquiet visits for the space of three weeks, during which time It would beat the Drum, and exactly answer any Tune that was knock’d, or called for. The House where the Gentleman had lodged his Children, being full of Strangers, he was forced to take them home again; and, because they had never observed any disturbance in the Parlor, he laid them there, where also their old Visitant found them; but, at this time, troubled them no otherwise than by plucking them by the hair and night-cloathes.

‘It would sometimes lift up the Servants with their Beds, and lay them down again gently, without any more prejudice than the fright of being carried to the Drummer’s quarters. And at other times It would lie like a great weight upon their Feet.

‘’Twas observed, that when the noise was loudest, and came with the most suddain and surprizing violence, yet no Dog would move. The Knocking was oft so boysterous and rude, that it hath been heard at a considerable distance in the Fields, and awakened the Neighbours in the Village, none of which live very near this house.

‘About the latter end of Decemb. 1662. the Drummings were less frequent, and the noise the Fiend made, was a gingling, as it had been of money, occasioned, as ’twas thought, by some discourse of an antient Gentlewoman, Mother to M. M. (who was one day saying to a Neighbour that talked of Fairies leaving money, that she should like It well, if It would leave them some to make amends for the trouble It made them) for that night there was a great chinking of money all the house over; but he that rose earliest the next morning, was ne’re a groat the richer. After this It desisted from its ruder noises, and employed It self about little apish Tricks, and less troublesome Caprichios. On Christmas Eve, an hour before day, one of the little Boyes arising out of his Bed, was hit on a sore place in his Heel by the latch of the Door, which the waggish Dæmons had pluckt out and thrown at him. The Pin that fastened it was so small, that ’twas for the credit of his Opticks that he pick’t it out without Candle-light. The night after Christmas Day, It threw all the old Gentlewoman’s Cloaths about the Room, and hid her Bible in the Ashes. In such impertinent ludicrous fagaries, it was frequent. After this the Spirit was very troublesome to a Servant of M. Mompesson’s, who was a stout fellow, and of sober conversation… His Master permitted him to give this proof of his courage, and lodg’d him in the next room to his own. There was John engarrison’d, and provided for the assault with a trusty Sword, and other implements of War. And, for some time, there was scarce a night past without some doubty action and encounter, in which the success was various. One while, John’s bag and baggage would be in the enemy’s power, Doublet and Breeches surprized, and his Shooes raised in rebellion against him; and then lusty John by Dint of Weapon recovers all again, suppresseth the insurrection of his Shooes, and holds his own in spight of Satan and the Drummer. And for the most part, our combatant came off with honour and advantage, except when his enemy outwatch’d and surprized him, and then he’s made a prisoner, bound hand and foot, and at the mercy of the Goblin; till he hath got the opportunity of recovering his Diabolical Blade, and then our Champion is in good plight again…

‘About the beginning of Jan. 1662 they were wont to hear a singing in the chimney, before It came down. And one night, about this time, Lights were seen in the House: One of which came into M. Mompesson’s Chamber, which seemed blue and glimmering, and caused a great stiffness in their eyes that saw it. After this light, something was heard coming up the Stairs, as if it had been some one without Shooes. The light was also 4 or 5 times seen in the Children’s Chamber; and the Maids confidently affirm that the doors were at least ten times opened, and shut in their sight. They heard a noise at the same time when the Doors were opened, as if half a dozen had entred in together. After which, some were heard to walk about the room, and one rusled as if it had been in silk. The like M. M. himself once heard.

‘During the time of the Knocking, when many were present, a Gentleman of the company said, Satan, If the Drummer sets thee a work, give three Knocks, and no more, which It did very distinctly, and stopt. Then the Gentleman knockt, to see if It would answer him as It was wont, but It remained quiet. He further tryed It the same way, bidding It, for confirmation, if It were the Drummer, to give 5 Knocks and no more that night, which It did accordingly, and was silent all the night after. This was done in the presence of Sir Tho. Chamberlain of Oxfordshire and several others.