Promise Of Passion

Ellis Frazer’s mother stared at Caroline for a full minute, a minute in which Caroline sensed she was being coolly assessed but not appraised. When she spoke, to Caroline’s dismay, it was with the same arrogant coldness which characterised her son.

‘You look nothing like a sculptress,’ she stated positively, as if, since she said it, it must be.

‘Caroline is, I assure you, Mother, the best, so don’t give her a hard time.’

That was good coming from him, Caroline thought, at the same time wondering if she should step closer to the woman. She stayed where she was, midway between that formidable wheelchair and the door Ellis Frazer had just propelled her through.

‘My mother, Vanessa Frazer,’ he told Caroline, pouring coffee as he spoke. ‘You might be honoured by being allowed to call her Vanessa—if she likes you,’ he went on, adding cryptically, ‘But don’t count on it.’ He spooned sugar in a coffee-cup and added a few drops of cream before taking it over to his mother.

Wide-eyed, Caroline gaped at the two of them, knowing deep in her heart that if she stayed and did this job it would be the most difficult of her life..

‘So what does she call you?’ Vanessa Frazer directed at her son, meaning Caroline but ignoring her as if she weren’t even on the same planet, let alone in the same room. ‘Not darling already, surely?’ she went on bitingly. ‘She looks far too sensible to fall for your disputable charms like the rest of them do. Heaven knows what they see in an ugly, whip-cracking tyrant like you but then most of them have been mindless society beauties only seduced by your money and your connections.’

Caroline listened in fascinated horror at the cutting words that spilled from her mouth.

Vanessa Frazer suddenly looked Caroline directly in the eye. ‘You wouldn’t be swayed into his bed by the thought of his wealth, would you?’ She immediately answered her own question before it had barely registered with a shocked Caroline. ‘Of course you wouldn’t. Far too sensible. Come closer; let me take a good look at you.’

Holy Mary! Caroline thought in utter dismay. This was a scene out of Dickens’ Great Expectations!

‘It’s for Caroline to scrutinise you, Mother, not the other way about,’ Ellis told her firmly. ‘Drop the Miss Havisham act and drink your coffee while I pour one for Caroline. Milk or cream?’ he asked her.

‘Neither,’ Caroline uttered weakly, still reeling at his perception in likening this scenario to the one she had been thinking of. But it wasn’t so surprising, she supposed; the two of them were as eccentric as any of Dickens’ characters.

‘So I live in a world of make-believe,’ Vanessa Frazer mused on, talking to no one in particular. ‘It’s all I have these days, that and memories. Nothing to live for because it’s all gone. I’m going out with a whimper because to fight is too wearing——’

‘Get out the violins,’ Ellis interjected quickly and to Caroline so cruelly that her hand shook as she took the coffee he brought to her. ‘It gets worse,’ Ellis told her, loud enough for his mother to hear. ‘She eats nurses for breakfast but before she does she reduces them to nervous wrecks with her demands and her insults. She enjoys it too.’

‘The only pleasure I have these days,’ Vanessa said sourly, burying her nose in her coffee-cup as if sniffing for poison. She lifted her head and nodded towards her son. ‘He gives me nothing but heartache.’

I can’t bear this, Caroline thought. I’ll never be able to work for these two; they’re awful to each other and to anyone who comes into contact with them. They are poison.

‘Darling,’ Ellis drawled, and stepped towards his mother, squatting down and taking a small, limp, blue-veined hand in his. ‘I give you the adrenaline that keeps you going from day to day, not heartache. Without our daily crossfire you would have crumpled long ago. Now stop giving Caroline a hard time and let her get on with her work. You’re going to like her, I promise you.’

He dropped an affectionate lingering kiss on the back of his mother’s hand and in that moment Caroline saw the deep love and devotion between them. Harsh words had flown around this room and now Caroline could see how wrong she had been in thinking the worst of them both. This was a game of survival. Vanessa Frazer was obviously a very sick lady and her arrogant son was her life support; whatever they said to each other wasn’t what it seemed.

It set a whole new scenario for this commission. It set a whole new problem for Caroline as she watched Ellis Frazer take the coffee-cup from his mother’s fragile hands and set it down on the floor while he rearranged the cashmere shawl around her legs. He wasn’t a cold, hard, arrogant man. Well, he was actually but maybe with good reason. He had his hands full. He wasn’t a mother’s boy, though; a mother’s boy wouldn’t have the nerve to handle his sick mother with such determined capability. So the man might be human after all.

But she had known that before entering this room. That shocking kiss had shown her just how wretchedly human he was. The kiss hadn’t swayed her thinking about the man, however. His mother had. Difficult she might be, but putting aside those difficulties which were sure to arise when she started the bronze of her, she knew it would be a challenge she couldn’t refuse. Vanessa Frazer was a fascinating subject from an artist’s viewpoint; and her son? He was just morbidly fascinating, Caroline acknowledged in her heart. An acknowledgement she wasn’t at all comfortable with but it wasn’t a problem, just a warning.

CHAPTER THREE

‘DID you bring a portfolio of your work for me to see?’ Vanessa Frazer asked at last.

Caroline nodded and lifted her bag from the floor where she had dropped it.

‘Haven’t you got a voice, young lady? You haven’t said a word yet,’ the not so frail lady said bitingly.

Ellis Frazer gave Caroline an encouraging nod from the side-table where he was pouring himself a coffee, a nod that Caroline didn’t need. She stepped towards the wheelchair by the fire, set her coffee-cup down on the hearth and sat down on a wing-chair across from her. She took her portfolio, photographs of her work, out from her bag.

‘Mrs Frazer, I’ve hardly had space to get a word in edgeways.’ She sat with the portfolio on her lap and looked at the lady. ‘And I think there is something you ought to know.’ From the corner of her eye she saw Ellis Frazer frowning at her and wondered if he thought she was going to mention Martha. ‘I don’t talk very much when I’m working. I’m usually concentrating hard on my subject so don’t expect scintillating conversation while I’m doing the preliminary sketches.’

Vanessa Frazer glared at her for an instant and then glanced at Ellis and pulled a face at him. It was a gesture that surprised Caroline but also delighted her. So she had a sense of humour. She wondered if her son had one too.

‘You haven’t got the job for sure yet, young lady, so don’t get clever,’ Mrs Frazer shot back at her.

It was a put-down, but Caroline didn’t take it to heart because she had faith in her own work. Without a word she handed the portfolio to the older woman and sat back while she leafed through it.

‘You can call me Vanessa,’ she murmured when she was halfway through the book, not looking up.

Caroline stole a glance at Ellis who gave her just the smidgeon of a smile.

At last Vanessa slammed shut the book and with tremulous fingers handed the book back to her.’You’ll do,’ she said. ‘You’re good, not exceptional, but I can’t expect better outside of London.’

‘I’ve seen the real thing,’ Ellis interjected smoothly, ‘and she’s exceptional, take my word for it, Mother. Now, Caroline, perhaps you’d like to explain to us both how you intend to work. Mother doesn’t travel so therefore a visit to your studio is out…’

Caroline felt a small glow permeate through her at the compliment to her work but quelled it when she realised it had probably been executed more for his mother’s benefit than hers. Yes, it was going to be a difficult assignment and she hadn’t met the stallion yet!

For the next ten minutes Caroline explained about the initial sketches she wanted to do and measurements she needed and the way she worked. She told them she used the lost wax method and would be able to show them her wax maquettes which would give a slightly smaller version of the completed work at a later stage and then she fell into silence and drew rapidly, taking careful and continuous observations of her subject. Not a difficult task, Caroline thought as she worked. Vanessa Frazer’s bone-structure was as interesting as her son’s.

When Caroline thought Vanessa was tiring she eased up and glanced across at Ellis who had stood all the while behind his mother, listening and occasionally nodding with satisfaction. Ellis gave her a look which suggested enough was enough. Caroline was glad. All the time she had been working a part of her had been worrying about Martha; now all of her was.

As if the child was psychic there was a sudden wail from outside the door. A wail that brought Caroline to her feet like a shot in panic.

‘I want Mummy!’

The door burst open and Martha tore into and across the room to Caroline before anyone could stop her.

‘Mummy, the horses are wonderful and there’s one that fits me——’

‘I thought I told you——’ In a rage Ellis Frazer strode across the room to Karen who stood helplessly in the doorway, her face flushed with embarrassment.

A heated exchange of words ensued behind Caroline as she clutched at Martha’s shoulders to hold her back, but she heard none of them clearly. Her total concentration was on the frail lady in the wheelchair who was staring with shock at the small girl in front of Caroline. Panic surged inside Caroline as the woman seemed to pale even more and visibly shrink back from the child.

The door slammed behind them and suddenly Ellis was there at his mother’s shoulders, steadying hands covering them in support. Caroline saw them tighten and then soften and she looked up at him in dismay.

‘I’m so…so terribly…sorry——’ she started to

whisper, but Ellis silenced her with a look that would have floored a giant.

‘I should have explained, Mother——’ he started, but didn’t finish because of an interruption from Martha.

‘Are you a queen?’ the little girl asked in awe.

Ellis snapped his eyes shut in sufferance and Caroline caught a gasp in her throat. Not now, she silently pleaded with Martha.

‘Do I look like one?’ Vanessa asked in a tolerant whisper, seeming to have recovered far quicker than Caroline or Ellis.

‘You haven’t got a crown but——’ Suddenly Martha stepped away from the restriction of Caroline’s hold on her and leaned across the wheelchair to touch the jewels at Vanessa Frazer’s throat.

Caroline noted Ellis’s hands moving down to the handles of the wheelchair as if he was about to pull his mother out of the reach of the inquisitive child. But mercifully he didn’t. None the less, his knuckles whitened as his grip tightened.

To her credit Vanessa Frazer suffered the scrutiny of the child’s curiosity with great control and dignity as Martha fingered the exquisite necklace at her throat. A true lady, Caroline thought, sensing that Vanessa had no time at all for small children. She sensed something more too but wasn’t sure how to interpret it. After the initial shock of Martha bursting into the room, Caroline thought she had seen a sign of sorrow in the old lady’s eyes but she could have been mistaken. Emotions were running high in the hot, claustrophobic room, more so Caroline’s for making that snap decision earlier to bring Martha with her. It had been an enormous mistake.

‘Do you like jewellery?’ Vanessa was asking the little girl.

Martha was now hanging over the arm of the wheelchair and kicking her legs behind her. ‘I want my ears pierced like my friend, Becky, but Nanny says I’ll look like a gypsy. I’d like to be a gypsy and then I could travel the world to find my father.’ The little girl took a deep breath before going on and Caroline felt faint. ‘My father is a prince and he’s looking for us.’

Vanessa’s watery eyes widened as she gazed at the child.

‘What an extraordinary child,’ she murmured, suddenly closing her eyes and leaning her head back.

Ellis moved her then, back a few paces away from the fire and away from Martha. ‘Time for your rest, Mother.’

A papery hand came up with surprising swiftness. ‘Leave me. I’ll rest when I’m good and ready.’ Without opening her eyes she went on to murmur, ‘So, you have a daughter, young lady. With or without a husband you are a very fortunate lady.’

Caroline’s eyes widened at the words which had echoed what Ellis had said yesterday and then her heart sank as the old lady added firmly, ‘Don’t bring her again. I’ve seen all I can bear.’

Dark undertones thrust Caroline back in time till she thought she must have stepped into a time warp when she’d entered this house. It was so wretchedly Gothic as to be unbelievable.

‘But I’d like to come again.’ Martha’s little voice filled the room when she realised the old lady had meant her. ‘I like the horses and I like you even if you don’t like me.’

Ellis cleared his throat. Caroline clawed at her drawing materials and thrust them into her bag and before she knew it had clutched at Martha with her free hand and was across the room with her before anyone could say anything else.

Outside in the hallway where a hundred years ago she had crossed the threshold, Caroline thrust her bag into Martha’s arms and the car keys into her small hand. ‘Get in the car, sweetheart. I’ll be out in a minute.’

Martha looked disappointed but for once didn’t protest. She turned to look up at Ellis who had followed them out and stood, just behind Caroline. ‘Thank you for letting me see the horses,’ she said politely, and turned and skipped out of the open front door, untouched by the old lady’s cool dismissal of her, obviously not having fully understood it.

In a fury Caroline turned to face Ellis Frazer. ‘Well, I’m the first to crack,’ she blurted. ‘Forget the com-mission, Mr Frazer. I would find it unbearable to continue one stage further——’

‘Just a minute——’

‘Not another minute more!’ Caroline rushed on. ‘I just don’t choose to go on with this. For a short time in there——’ her hand came up to wave towards the interior ‘—I warmed to your mother, but the feeling soon passed, I assure you.’

‘You don’t understand——’

‘Oh, but I do understand,’ Caroline interrupted again. She was going to get this out if it killed her. ‘So your mother isn’t a well lady but that is no excuse for her——’

‘That is every excuse for her,’ Ellis told her decisively, his eyes dark and defying her to question it. ‘She loathes being the way she is and living the rest of her life in that chair. Surely that’s understandable?’

With both hands Caroline scooped her hair from her forehead and tried to cool her temper but it was hard when she had been through what she had, witnessing those two clawing at each other’s emotions and then Martha rushing in that way.

‘I…I’m sorry your mother is so ill—truly sorry,’ she expressed sincerely. ‘But I have to be honest about all this…’ Her voice trailed away and she shook her head slightly as if she couldn’t find the right words.

‘Go on,’ Ellis urged tightly, making her feel bad.

She lifted her lashes and gazed at him, hoping he might understand. But then she supposed he wouldn’t. He was the sort to only see his own viewpoint.

‘I…I think I would find the work more stressful than I thought possible,’ she admitted. ‘I don’t know either of you well enough to begin to comprehend what I’ve seen today. I thought at first I could, that I could see why you were the way you were with each other—a sort of survival package to get you through the stresses of the incapacity.’

He nodded. ‘Partly true but we’ve always been like that with each other and see no reason to change a way of life and slip into morbid routine because my mother is so sick. You caught her on a bad day today. It isn’t always like this.’

Caroline nodded, understanding. It seemed to be a bad day all round for everyone. She thought of her mother at home, having one of her bad days, and the thought weighed heavy.

She nodded towards the car where Martha had switched on the ignition and slipped a cassette into the dashboard player. Pop music blared out from the open door.

‘That’s a new life,’ she told him. ‘Vibrant, full of fun, ongoing and not looking back.’ She let out a small sigh and looked up at Ellis Frazer. ‘I walked into your mother’s sitting-room and felt I’d stepped back in time, between the pages of a Dickens pot-boiler…’

‘She had me late in life,’ offered Ellis with a small, apologetic smile teasing at the corners of his mouth.

Caroline gave him a weak smile in return. ‘I wasn’t suggesting that she was that old, but…but——’ another sigh ‘—I felt there were dark undertones between you, perhaps bitterness even, dreams not achieved, disappointments.’

He raised a dark brow. ‘You’re very observant,’ he smoothed.

So she hadn’t imagined it all. ‘But not curious. I don’t want to know them,’ Caroline said quickly. ‘I’m not prying and——’

‘And I’m not going to tell you anyway,’ he put in equally quickly. ‘Let’s leave it with both of us keeping our skeletons in our own cupboards, shall we?’

Oh, that remark was well below the belt but at least he had admitted he had some dark secrets too. Hers were different, though; they didn’t belong to her and she realised this was the root of what she was trying to get at. These last years she’d seemed to be bogged down with everyone else’s problems but her own. And what were her own? Loneliness for one thing—the thought that there would never be a prince in her life; but she had a princess and she was indeed fortunate, as the Frazers were fond of telling her.

Caroline gave herself the familiar mental shakedown and looked Ellis squarely in the eye.

‘I can’t do this commission for you,’ she stated honestly. ‘I can’t guarantee that there won’t be times when I might have to inflict Martha on you both again. You find her discomfiting and your mother obviously can’t stand children. You’ve already made it plain she isn’t welcome here. She’s my daughter and I’m biased, I know, because I love her so much but she is a delightful child. She hasn’t a spiteful bone in the whole of her little body. She’s innocent and untouched by all that’s wrong in the world and I don’t want her subjected——’

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