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Building Dreams
Tess shook her head at the memory, a bemused half-smile tugging at her lips. It still boggled her mind that her warm, loving, unpretentious husband had been the offspring of two such stuffed shirts as Harold and Enid Benson.
Tess knew Tom’s older brother Charles only slightly better. He had visited them three or four times when he’d been in town on family business. Though not as stiff as his parents, he was ultra sophisticated and polished, but at least he had made a halfhearted effort to be friendly.
As yet, the Bensons did not know about the baby. The last contact she’d had with any of them—Charles included—had been at Tom’s funeral, and she hadn’t known then that she was pregnant. She had written to them twice but received no reply. She could only conclude that to Tom’s family, his death had severed whatever tenuous tie had existed between them.
Should she write and tell them about the baby? Tess groaned. She had been asking herself that question for months. On the one hand, it seemed wrong not to. But on the other hand, she was uneasy about how they would react to the news. Tom had always maintained that the only way to remain independent from his family was to have as little to do with them as possible. She certainly did not want them interfering or trying to take control of her child, as they had tried to control Tom.
Tess didn’t know what to do, so she kept putting the decision off. There was plenty of time.
From the McCalls’ apartment on the other side of her living room wall, came the faint sound of a shower running and Mike singing at the top of his lungs in his cracked voice. Tess grinned and closed her eyes. A minute later she heard Ryan McCall climb the stairs and enter the apartment.
Suddenly an idea occurred to her. Tess opened her eyes and sat up, mulling it over. Of course. Why hadn’t she thought of it sooner. She had been trying to come up with a way to thank Mike properly for all his help, and this was perfect. She would do it right now.
Getting up off the sofa proved difficult but after three tries she finally heaved herself to her feet and headed for the telephone.
Mike’s father answered on the second ring.
“Mr. McCall, this is Tess Benson. I—”
“Mike can’t come to the phone right now,” he said shortly. “He’s in the shower. You’ll have to call back later.”
“Oh, but I’m not calling for Mike,” Tess said in a rush, sensing he was about to hang up. “I called to talk to you.”
The statement met dead silence at the other end of the line.
Suddenly, Tess felt uneasy and she wasn’t sure why. “I uh…I called to invite you and Mike over for dinner Friday night. After all he’s done to hel—”
“No.”
“I beg your pardon?”
“I said no. I’m turning down your invitation.”
“I…” Tess was so flustered she could barely think. She had never met anyone quite as abrupt as Ryan McCall. “Oh. I see. Well, look, if Friday isn’t convenient we can make it—”
“The answer would still be no. It isn’t a matter of inconvenience. I’m simply not interested in having dinner with you.”
Tess was shocked to the core of her being. She could not utter a sound, and for several seconds the line hummed with a stunned silence. Never in her life had anyone spoken to her with such brutal frankness. Hadn’t the man ever heard of tact or social grace?
Finally Tess cleared her throat. “I see. Mr. McCall, have I offended you in some way? If so, I assure you it was unintentional.”
“Very good, Mrs. Benson. That really sounded sincere. But you’re wasting your time.”
“I—Pardon me? I don’t understand.”
“You can cut out the innocent act. I know what you’re up to.”
“Up to?”
“Having Mike over constantly. Flattering him, making him like you. Inviting the two of us over for dinner.”
“Mr. McCall, I have no idea what you’re talking about. I merely thought that you and your son would enjoy a home-cooked meal. It was just my way of thanking Mike for his help and you for allowing him to give it.”
“Yeah, right,” he sneered. “You know, at first I thought you were one of those licentious women who get their kicks by seducing young boys.”
“What!”
“But now I realize that you were just using Mike to get to me,” Ryan continued without missing a beat.
“Using—Me—? You—? You mean you thought I would seduce—? Oh!Ohhh! Why, you…you…”
Tess sputtered and fumed, too shocked and enraged to think of anything vile enough to call him.
“Save your outraged act for someone else,” Ryan snapped. “It doesn’t work on me. As I said, you’re wasting your time, Mrs. Benson. I’m just not interested.”
Tess gulped a deep breath and fought for control. “Mr. McCall, you are not only a colossal egotist, you’re sick and disgusting! I am hardly at the peak of my sexual attractiveness at the moment, but even if I were, let me assure you that I would not be interested in you!”
She had started off speaking slowly and distinctly through her clenched teeth but with each word her voice rose in pitch and volume, until by the time she reached the end she was shrieking.
“Good. Then we understand each other,” he said matter-of-factly, and hung up.
Tess gasped and jerked the receiver away from her ear. She stared at it. “Oh! Of all the—!” She slammed the phone down so hard it jumped out of its cradle and she had to do it again, which made her all the more furious.
Unable to move, she stood there, shaking all over, her heart pounding, breathing hard. Several seconds passed before she noticed. Oh, Lord. It couldn’t be good for the baby to get so upset, she thought. Calm down. Just calm down.
Leaning back against the wall, she closed her eyes, splayed one hand against her heaving chest, the other across her belly and drew several deep breaths.
“I’m sorry, baby. I’m sorry,” she soothed in a caressing voice. “I shouldn’t have yelled like that. But Mommy’s okay now. Everything’s fine.”
Gathering her scattered composure, Tess pushed away from the wall and returned to the sofa, lowering herself gingerly onto the cushion. She still felt shaky. No one had ever made her that angry before. She hadn’t known she could get that angry.
But then, who wouldn’t if they had to deal with an obnoxious man like Ryan McCall?
When she had met him, she had given him the benefit of the doubt and put his abruptness down to a bad mood, but not this time. The man was a rude, evil-minded, ill-tempered brute. Imagine! Accusing her, in her condition, of coming on to him! And worse, of trying to seduce his thirteen-year-old son. It was a mystery how that hateful man ever produced a boy like Mike.
Mike. Tess sighed, sadness washing over her. As bad as she hated to, she would have to break all ties with the boy. His father obviously did not approve of their friendship. Anyway, the way things stood, she doubted that she could hide her feelings. Certainly she wouldn’t be able to hold her tongue whenever Mike mentioned his father, which was sure to be often. Mike and his dad were close, and the boy clearly adored him. Whatever else he was, Ryan McCall was apparently a good parent.
Tess discovered that she did not have the heart to tell Mike that they could no longer be friends. When faced with those guileless blue eyes and that eager face, she simply could not utter the words. So she tried to discourage him by withdrawing.
Over the next few days she avoided him whenever she could. When he knocked, she didn’t answer her door. She monitored her telephone calls through the answering machine, never picking up when the caller was Mike. When she left her apartment or returned, she did so quietly, tiptoeing in and out like a thief, and feeling as guilty as though she were one. On the few occasions when she did run into him, she pretended to be either in a hurry to get somewhere or terribly busy.
Mike, however, was not one to be put off by evasions. On the evening of the third day after the disastrous telephone conversation, he waylaid Tess in the hallway outside their apartments.
It was late when she climbed the stairs and found him sitting on the floor outside her door. He looked as though he had every intention of staying there all night if he had to.
Tess jerked to a halt at the top of the stairs so suddenly that Amanda nearly barrelled into her.
“Hey! Watch out,” her friend yelped, but Tess didn’t hear her.
“Mike! What are you doing here? It’s late.”
Mike looked up, his expression sullen. “Waiting to see you.”
“Oh.” Tess licked her lips and glanced uneasily at her friend. “We’ve…uh…we’ve been to a Lamaze class. Amanda’s my coach.”
“Hi there, sweetie. How ya doing?” Amanda said, but he merely shrugged and mumbled, “Okay” before returning his attention to Tess.
He climbed to his feet and brushed off the seat of his pants. His gaze never left her.
“I thought you said we were friends.”
“Why…we are, Mike.”
“Then how come you didn’t answer your door this morning when I knocked?” Both his look and his tone accused.
“I…guess I wasn’t here.”
“Your car was in the parking lot. I checked.”
“I see. Well, then…” Tess gestured vaguely. “I must have been in the mail room.”
“Uh-uh. I checked there, too.”
Amanda remained silent. Her shrewd gaze switched back and forth between them.
“I see. Well…I, uh…I suppose we just missed each other somehow,” Tess said lamely.
Mike stared at her in silence. Tess could feel the guilt written all over her face, but there was nothing to do but brazen it out.
“Can I come in?” he asked finally.
“Oh. Well…I’m pretty tired, and it’s getting late. Maybe some other time.”
Hurt flashed in Mike’s eyes. Then pride took over and his young face grew remote. “Yeah. Sure.” He nodded and stuck his hands into his back pockets. “See ya.”
Tess watched him walk away with a lump in her throat.
“Would you mind telling me what that was all about?” Amanda demanded the moment they stepped inside Tess’s apartment. “You were downright cold to that boy.”
“I know.” Emotion threatened to choke her, and her voice wavered. Fighting back tears, she gave her friend a woeful look. “Oh, Amanda,” she whispered wretchedly.
Without a word, Amanda’s demeanor softened, and she gathered Tess close—or as close as her girth would allow—and led her toward the sofa. “All right, now. Tell me what’s happened,” Amanda said in a commanding but gentle voice once they were settled.
Hesitantly, Tess recounted what had transpired between herself and Ryan McCall. During the tale, Amanda’s expression ran the gamut—from a haughtily raised eyebrow to a sagging jaw and finally ending with her beautiful face set in an icy mask of fury. “Do you mean that bastard had the unmitigated gall to accuse you—you of all people—of trying to seduce Mike?” she said, enunciating every word in a tight, dangerous voice. “And of using that sweet boy to get to him?”
Miserable, Tess nodded.
“Why that sorry, no good…And to think, I thought he was the nice one.”
“For some reason, he seems to have taken an intense dislike to me. So you can see that I have to break off my friendship with Mike. I really don’t have any other choice.”
“I suppose you’re right.” Amanda sighed. “It’s a shame though. Mike is bound to be hurt.”
Tess tried not to think about that. “Yes, well…at least his father should be pleased.”
Ryan was delighted. For the past three days Mike had not so much as mentioned Tess Benson. He had been spending more time at home, as well. From his son’s glum mood, Ryan strongly suspected that after their talk Mrs. Benson had realized she was wasting her time buttering up Mike and had dropped him like a hot potato.
He hated to see the boy so depressed, but Ryan figured he would get over it soon. In a day or two he’d be enthused about something else and forget all about their new neighbor.
However, when Ryan entered the apartment on Friday evening, far from improved, Mike’s mood had worsened. Sprawled in a chair with one leg hooked over the arm, he stared morosely at the television screen. In response to his father’s greeting he mumbled something but barely spared him a glance.
“Hey, what is this? Why the long face? Cheer up, son. Things can’t be that bad,” Ryan teased, tweaking the toe of Mike’s sneaker.
“Oh, yeah? That’s what you think.”
“So what’s the problem?” The question brought no response, and Ryan nudged him again. “C’mon, you know you can tell me.”
Mike grimaced, but finally he shot his dad a sulky look. “I don’t think Tess likes me anymore. She doesn’t return my calls. She doesn’t answer her door. I think she’s avoiding me.”
Ryan’s lips thinned. Impatience rippled through him and edged his voice. “It that all? So what? Forget about her.”
He turned away, flipping through the mail. It contained nothing of importance so he tossed it onto his desk and sat down in his easy chair. Picking up the evening newspaper, he glanced at his son, again. To his surprise, Mike was watching him, his eyes narrowed and filled with suspicion.
“Have you eaten?” Ryan asked.
“Yeah. I had some frozen egg rolls.”
“Good.” He snapped open the paper and tried to ignore his son’s penetrating stare.
“Dad, do you know why Tess is acting strange?”
“How the hell would I know?” Ryan barked, his conscience stabbing him.
“You didn’t talk to her or anything?”
“Look, Mike. Why are you making such a big deal about this woman? She’s nothing to us.”
“The change in her was real quick,” Mike mused, ignoring his father’s question. “Like maybe somebody did something to upset her.”
“So? Women get upset easily.” Ryan shifted in the chair and snapped the newspaper again, scowling at the printed page without seeing a word.
Mike sat forward, his eyes widening. “You did talk to her, didn’t you?”
Faced with a direct challenge, Ryan could not lie. He was always honest with his son. But he resented being cornered. Why couldn’t Mike just let the whole thing drop? “All right, yeah, I talked to her,” he replied belligerently. “So what?”
“When? What did you say to her?”
“She called and invited us over for dinner. I turned down the invitation.”
“But why?” Mike wailed.
Rarely did Ryan lose his temper with his son, but the anguished question pushed him over the edge. “Dammit, Mike, you know why. I will not be manipulated by some man-hungry female. What’s more, I resent the way the woman has been cozying up to you to get to me.”
Mike leaped out of his chair. His gangly body vibrated with outrage. “Tess wouldn’t do that!” he shouted. “Anyway, she’s not interested in you!”
“Don’t kid yourself. All women are on the make for a man. Or maybe I should say, a breadwinner.”
“Not Tess. That’s just plain stupid. You don’t even know her. You don’t know anything about her! She’s nice, and…and…and she’s special! And now she probably won’t ever speak to me again! And it’s all your fault!” he shouted, and bolted for his room.
“Mike! Mike, come back here!” Ryan called after him, springing up out of his chair. He could have saved his breath. Mike’s door slammed with a force that rattled the walls.
“Damn.” Spinning around, Ryan slammed his fist down on the back of the chair.
He paced back and forth across the room. This was all that damned Benson woman’s fault. He and Mike had never had a serious disagreement until now.
Why was his son so taken with her? What the hell was so special about the woman?
Ryan stopped and glanced toward the bedrooms. Mike might be innocent enough to believe she had no interest in him beyond simple neighborliness, but experience had taught him otherwise. Ever since Julia had walked out on him and Mike, women had been pursuing him like hounds after a fox. Strangely, it seemed that the more he tried to discourage them, the more remote and abrupt he was, the more relentless they were. And the more devious their ploys. Tess Benson certainly wasn’t the first woman who had tried to use Mike to attract his interest.
Ryan sat down on the sofa. Slumping forward, he braced his elbows on his spread knees and massaged his temples. He sighed. Maybe Reilly was right. Maybe Mike did need a mother figure in his life. That gentling, nurturing female influence that he and his brothers and sister had grown up with.
Guiltily, Ryan recalled the wistful look that sometimes came over Mike’s face when he talked about a friend’s mom. On those occasions Ryan had always stifled his twinges of conscience and told himself that they were doing just fine on their own. But were they? Was Mike?
Yes, dammit! Ryan shot up off the sofa and began to pace. Mike was bright and happy and well adjusted. He was doing well in school; he had plenty of friends. Just because no woman played an active role in his life that didn’t mean he was deprived. He could even be better off. God knew, some women were wretched mothers. Julia certainly had been.
He wanted to forbid Mike to have anything more to do with Tess Benson, but he knew that would not be wise. Mike was at a touchy age. Ryan didn’t want to push him into rebellion. No, the best thing he could do was wait it out. It might take time, but eventually Mike would get over his infatuation with their new neighbor.
At breakfast the next morning the atmosphere between the two McCall males was frosty. Mike responded to his father’s pleasant “Good morning” with a curt nod and skirted around him in the small kitchen as though he weren’t there, his young face stiff. Ryan’s question about what Mike wanted to eat was met with an abrupt, “Never mind. I’ll get it myself.”
After five minutes of sitting side by side at the breakfast bar, eating their cereal in stony silence, Ryan had had enough.
“This is ridiculous,” he snapped. “We have to talk about this, Mike.”
Mike merely shrugged and kept on spooning cereal into his mouth.
“Look, son,” he said as patiently as he could manage. “You know how I feel about women. You’ve always known. But, hey! Just because I don’t want to be around Mrs. Benson doesn’t mean you can’t be friends with her.”
Mike cut his eyes toward his father, his expression still sullen. “You hurt her feelings. Now she doesn’t want to be friends with me.”
“Well then, I guess you’ll just have to try harder. Look, tell her I said it was all right.”
Mike grimaced and stared at his cereal bowl.
“C’mon, son.” Ryan cuffed him on the shoulder. “Whaddaya say?”
Dramatically rolling his eyes, the boy heaved a sigh. “O-kay,” he agreed finally, in a put-upon voice that only a teenager can achieve.
“Good. So, how about it? Are we friends again?”
Mike shot him another sharp look. Ryan could see that he was struggling to hold on to his rancor, but Mike’s basic good nature never allowed him to stay angry for long. In that respect he was far more like his Uncle Reilly than his father. Ryan’s twin was unfailingly, at times maddeningly, good-natured and jovial, and on those rare occasions when he did lose his temper his anger never lasted long.
Finally Mike’s mouth twitched in a reluctant, somewhat abashed smile. “Yeah. I guess.”
By the time they headed out to do their Saturday grocery shopping and errands, the camaraderie between father and son was fully restored. Ryan’s mood was buoyant…until, a mile or so from the apartment, he spotted Tess.
Her car was sitting by the side of the road with a flat tire, and she was bending over the open trunk. He couldn’t see her face, but there was no mistaking that bright hair or that battered little car.
Ryan speeded up, hoping that Mike wouldn’t notice her. That hope was dashed almost instantly.
“Look! There’s Tess!” he shouted. “And she has a flat!” He looked at his father, his face at first eager, then crestfallen. “Aren’t you gonna stop?”
Ryan opened his mouth to tell him that these days liberated women changed their own flat tires, but before he could, Tess straightened up and turned around with the jack in her hands.
Ryan’s head whipped around as he zoomed past her. “What the—?” His eyes bulged and his jaw dropped.
He snapped his mouth shut then opened it again to cut loose with a stream of colorful curse words that had Mike gaping, stomped on the brake and brought the Cherokee to a screeching halt on the shoulder of the road.
He stabbed his son with an irate glare. “She’s pregnant! Why the hell didn’t you tell me she was pregnant!”
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