The Bachelor's Baby Dilemma

They’d dated for six months. They’d been inseparable but they hadn’t gone to the same high school. She’d attended an all-girls academy, an environment that made her shy around boys.

As a beauty queen, she’d hidden behind the persona she’d created. But she was different in real life. Even now, he could see fragments of the girl she’d once been: the awkward manner in which she tugged at her clothes, the way she broke eye contact.

He couldn’t help but be intrigued by her. Her chestnut-colored hair was sleeker than it used to be, worn straight and falling softly to her shoulders. Her clothes were simple: a fitted T-shirt paired with black leggings—or whatever those impossibly tight things were called. Her lean, athletic shape wasn’t hard to miss. And with her being a yoga instructor, he suspected she was beyond flexible. But she’d always been able to get into bendy positions. In the talent competition of the pageants, she used to perform modern dance.

The girl with the sugary name.

He used to call her all sorts of silly things: gumdrop, taffy, peanut brittle, gummy bear, lollipop. But his favorite had been cotton candy, especially when she wore pink. Did she still wear that color? Or had she outgrown it? Seventeen years had passed. A lifetime of memories.

She led him through the back door and into the kitchen, and he suspected that this was her prized room in the house, with its butcher-block island and bright white appliances. An antique cart in the corner was crowded with spices, pots and pans, old salt and pepper shakers, and other culinary knickknacks.

No doubt she liked to cook. It even smelled like cookies. It appeared as if a candle was creating the fresh-baked aroma, but it still struck him as homey, with the desired effect being the same.

She definitely seemed domestic. Even at a young age, she’d been marriage-minded. Back when they were together, she’d been determined to save herself for her future husband. She’d thought it was a romantic notion. And now she was divorced.

He wondered about the type of guy she’d married and what had gone wrong, but he sure as fire wasn’t going to ask her, no matter how curious he was.

His thoughts continued to be scattered as Candy walked him all over the house, pointing out architectural details and decorative features.

Once they were in the second guestroom, she said, “This could be Ivy’s nursery. It’s already painted in pastels.” She motioned to the walls. “Lilac trimmed in yellow.”

He checked out the color theme, and she smiled, quite sweetly, as if she was picturing the baby snuggled up in this room. Seeing her expression gave him comfort, reminding him of how special she was. “Did I ever thank you for being there for me? When everything happened?”

“You were my friend. My boyfriend. I wanted to help you through it.”

“I know.” Behind her, the light from a set of etched glass windows was bathing the potential nursery in a warm glow. “But I just wanted to clarify that if I didn’t tell you how much it meant to me then, I’m telling you now.”

“You don’t need to.” She kept her voice soft. “Really, you don’t. But I appreciate it.”

“I don’t want to go backward in time. But ever since Meagan asked me to become Ivy’s guardian, I keep sliding into the past.”

“And now, of all things, you run into me.”

“It’s strange, isn’t it? Especially since we have a friend in common that we didn’t even know about.”

“Did you tell Eric that your sister is in prison and that you’ll be taking care of her baby?”

He shook his head. “That wasn’t something I was inclined to mention while we were getting caught up. I probably should have, though. You can tell him if you want to. You’ll probably talk to him before I will. Or you’ll talk to Dana or whatever.”

“Does Meagan know that you’ve been thinking about Ella?” she asked.

“No. I couldn’t say that to her. It wouldn’t be right to burden her with it. And if it’s crossed her mind, she hasn’t said anything to me about it, either. But I think she made peace with what happened to Ella a long time ago. She talks about our sister as if she’s an angel looking down on us. But maybe it’s because Meagan was so young when Ella died that she saw it in a softer way.”

“Kids are supposed to be more resilient.”

Tanner shifted his stance, glad that Meagan didn’t share his fears. “We discussed other aspects of me becoming Ivy’s guardian, like how taking care of a baby is going to affect my lifestyle. I warned her that I don’t know anything about being a single dad. Or any kind of dad.”

“You’re not the father. You’re the uncle.”

“Not according to tradition. In the old Cheyenne way, being an uncle is the same as being a father, and it’s especially important if the dad is unavailable. In the early days, the word for father and uncle was one and the same. Tshe-hestovestse.”

She flashed another of her sweet smiles. “That’s nice. I like that.”

Tanner didn’t. To him, it just intensified his role in his niece’s life. “I bought a bunch of baby books.”

She moved a little closer. “You did?”

“Yes, but I haven’t read them yet. Still, I figured it would help to know the stages and what to expect. It wouldn’t be fair to Ivy to leave everything to the nanny. I don’t want my niece to think I’m treating her like a leper. Babies can probably sense that kind of stuff.”

“I’m sure they can.” She was looking at him as if he’d just bewitched her.

Teasing her, he replied, “Is this how women are going to react to me now? Am I going to become a major chick magnet because I have a baby?”

“What are you talking about?”

“You’re acting all dreamy over me, Candy.”

“I am not.” She got downright indignant, squaring her shoulders and jutting out her pretty little chin. “I’m just standing here.”

“Making goo-goo eyes at me.”

“You’re full of baloney.”

He shrugged, then laughed. “I was just kidding around.” It was his twisted way of cracking a joke, of making light of the chemistry that still existed between them.

She made a face at him. “You always did have a rotten sense of humor.”

“At least I haven’t lost that side of myself. With everything that’s going on, I could be crying in my beer.”

“Are you kidding? You practically are.”

Touché, he thought. She’d got him there. He rolled his eyes, and they both managed a genuine laugh.

He returned his attention to the pastel-colored walls, going back to where the conversation first started. “I don’t know anything about decorating a nursery.” He didn’t have a clue about that sort of thing. “When the time comes, I’ll have to get someone to help me pick out the furniture, just to be sure I don’t screw it up.”

“Maybe you can order a complete set, with everything already going together.”

“That should work.”

“It will, Tanner. It’ll all work out.”

“Thanks.” He appreciated that she was offering positive affirmations. He needed as many good vibes as he could get. Then he took a second look at her and said, “You seem like you should’ve had kids. With you knowing so much about them.”

She cleared her throat. “I spend a lot of time with Eric and Dana’s son.”

That made sense, of course. But she still seemed as if she should’ve had some of her own. He wondered why she hadn’t, but he decided not to push the issue or pry into her personal affairs.

Next up was the master bedroom, and as soon as Candy led him to the place where she slept each night, being in the proximity of her silk-draped bed hit him square in the chest.

But why wouldn’t it? Not only had they never been together in that way, he hadn’t even been allowed in her room when they were kids. Her mom had been superstrict about that. But her mom wasn’t part of the equation anymore. Candy and Tanner were adults now.

When their gazes locked, she began fussing with her clothes, resorting to her nervous habit. Clearly, she was feeling the heat, too.

He tried to think of something to say that would ease the tension. But nothing came to mind.

She started a choppy conversation instead, prattling on about the room: the walk-in closet, the built-in window seat, the French door leading to the backyard.

“It produces a nice breeze,” she hastily said.

“And a beautiful view,” he replied, trying to glance past her and failing. Candy was the beautiful view he was talking about. He admired the way she looked, surrounded by the feminine trappings of her room. A candle was burning in here, too, like in the kitchen. Only it was something floral, a light, fluttery scent mimicking the flowers she grew in her garden. He didn’t know one bee-kissed posy from another, but he remembered giving her a corsage when he’d taken her to his junior prom. But mostly what he remembered was the sweetly sinful dress she’d worn. Red, like the color of fire.

“Where do you live?” she asked suddenly.

Her question threw him off-kilter. “What?”

“You never mentioned where you live now or why you can’t have the nanny and Ivy move in with you there, at least until Meagan comes home.”

He snapped back to reality. “I live at the stables in a bachelor-type pad above my office. I’m going to keep it for when I need a quiet place to be alone.” He quickly added, “Or to date or whatever.”

“That would be better, I suppose.”

“For me, it is.” Curious about her future, he asked, “Are you planning on buying another house?”

She shook her head. “I wasn’t going to mention this, but there’s no point in hiding it. I could never afford another house. After my divorce, I bought this place with a small inheritance from my grandparents, but I got in over my head.” She made a tight face. “I’m starting to fall behind on the payments on my first mortgage, and I owe a balloon payment on my second and don’t have the money for that, either.”

“I’m sorry.” He could see how distressing it was for her. It also explained why her ex wasn’t involved. She hadn’t owned the house with him.

“I’m down to a part-time job now. Enrollment is low at the studio where I work and some of my classes had to be cut. I’ve been looking for another part-time job to make up the difference, but I haven’t found anything yet.”

“I’m sorry,” he said again.

“I’ll get through it. Eric and Dana offered to let me stay with them after this place sells so I can take a little time to get on my feet and not burn through the money. Not that it will be that much. I messed up my equity by taking out that second loan.”

“How close are you to foreclosure?”

“The bank hasn’t started the proceeding yet, so there’s still time. But it concerns me.” She swallowed, as if a lump had formed in her throat. “I never imagined being this broke.”

“I understand. I’ve been through some tough times, too. My mom loaned me the money for the down payment on my stables, and she took a huge risk on me. It was a run-down facility, and building it into a successful operation didn’t happen overnight. It was touch-and-go there for a while. I was really worried that I was going to lose everything, including her investment in it.”

“What’s it like now?”

“It’s everything I envisioned it should be. We offer full-service boarding, riding lessons and trails to Griffith Park. The public can rent horses from us, of course, and go on guided tours of the trails, but we also provide rentals for the movie industry. It’s like the stables I worked at when I was a kid, except way nicer. We cater to both English and Western riders. We host equestrian events, too.”

“It sounds wonderful. I’m glad for you, Tanner.”

“Thanks. I hope things improve for you.”

“For now, I just need to sell my house.”

Deciding to be direct, he said, “I like this place. It has a lot going for it, but I don’t know if I’m going to make an offer. I still have other properties to see.”

“I understand, and I appreciate you letting me know up front. A lot of people have gushed over it, but then they disappear without a word.”

“I’ll let you know, either way.”

“Thank you.”

They exited her bedroom, and she walked him out to the porch.

Neither of them leaned forward for a hug. The emotion connected to this reunion was too heavy for a lighthearted embrace, and they both seemed to know it.

But that didn’t mean he didn’t hunger to take her in his arms or breathe in the scent of her skin or put his mouth against hers. If she was the kind of woman who was prone to affairs, he would seduce her, just to satisfy the longing. But he sensed that Candy wasn’t that kind of woman. That deep inside, she was the same proper girl he’d left behind.

Before the moment got ridiculously quiet, he repeated his promise to keep in touch. “I’ll call when I make a decision.”

“Okay.” Her gaze lit softly on his. “Talk to you later.”

“You, too.” He almost smoothed a strand of hair that blew across her cheek, but he caught himself, keeping his hands at his sides. Saying goodbye shouldn’t be this hard.

He descended the steps and strode out to his truck. By the time he climbed into the cab and glanced back at the house, Candy was no longer on the porch. But it was just as well. Tanner didn’t want to see her standing there, tempting him to feel things he didn’t want to feel.

* * *

Later that evening, Candy sat on the sofa with her legs tucked beneath her and her smartphone on speaker. She and Dana were in the midst of a conversation, with Candy relaying the events of the day.

“Tanner seems the same, but different.” A swoon-worthy boy who’d grown into a powerful man. Her heart was pounding just thinking about him. “It was a gripping reunion, that’s for sure. His life is even more mixed-up than mine.” She repeated his tale, going all the way back to when they were teenagers.

Dana reacted with sympathy. “That’s so awful for his family, to lose a baby. And now his other sister being in prison and being forced to be separated from her child. I can’t imagine how she must feel.”

“You wouldn’t have to imagine it. You wouldn’t have embezzled money from your job. But I feel sorry for her, too. She was such a sweet little girl when I knew her.”

“Tanner certainly must be a decent guy. I mean, let’s face it, not many men would do what he is doing. Eric was petrified of marrying me and becoming a new father, as you well remember. And here Tanner is going to be a father figure to his niece.”

“I agree that what he’s doing is admirable. But he’s beyond scared.” Candy blew out a sigh. “He’s concerned about everything, including how raising his niece over the next two years is going to affect his dating life.”

“Why? Is he a player?”

“I have no idea how much he plays around.” Nor did she want to envision him with a slew of women at his beck and call. “But he definitely likes being single. He made that clear. He’s even keeping his apartment at the equestrian center to make dating easier. I guess he doesn’t want to bring someone home to where his niece and the nanny are going to be.”

Dana went silent, as if the cogs in her pretty little blond head were turning. Then she said, “Why am I getting the feeling that his dating life bothers you?”

Candy’s pulse quickened. Should she admit that she was still attracted to him or keep that bit of information to herself? She opted for an evasive answer. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Yes, you do. Come on, fess up. Give me the skinny.”

She should have known better than to think she would get away with this. Fooling Dana was like trying to fool a wise old owl, even if Dana was younger than Candy. “All right, fine. There was definitely some rekindled heat between us.”

“Well, thank goodness for that.” A big sappy smile sounded in Dana’s voice. “Do you realize that he’s the first man you’ve been attracted to since your divorce?”

“Yes, and he’s someone I used to date. Starting up with him again would be a disaster.” A road that was better left untraveled.

“Maybe so, but at least you’re getting your libido back.”

She didn’t see where that was going to help, not if it left her fantasizing about him. She needed to be careful. Because if she let her hormones drive her, she just might do something she would regret. Even now, as she touched a finger to her lips, she could conjure the long-ago flavor of his kiss.

“I think he’s going to buy your house.”

Distracted, Candy nearly bit the tip of her finger. She was still dreaming about the taste of Tanner’s kiss. “You do? Why?”

“I just felt all along that something good would come of this.”

“You always think something good will come of everything.” Dana was a naturally positive person. She didn’t have to try to be happy; she just was. Candy worked heart and soul to feel that kind of inner bliss. “But I hope you’re right. If he buys it, then Ivy will be growing up in my house, and that’s a nice thought. I also like the idea of it becoming the place Meagan shares with her daughter.”

But what about Tanner? she asked herself.

How did she feel about him being part of the mix? Did she want him—this beautifully complicated man from her past—drinking coffee in her kitchen or showering in her tub or sleeping in her room?

Yes, heaven help her, she did. As romantically frazzled as her connection to him was, Candy was intrigued by the notion of Tanner living there, too.

Chapter Three

The sun shined in the sky, reminiscent of the happy drawings Meagan used to do. But the crayon-colored weather didn’t improve the setting, and neither did the other families gathered on picnic-style benches. The chain-link fence and watchful eyes of prison guards ruined it. As much as Tanner loved his sister, he hated visiting her here.

Struggling not to frown, he glanced across their bench, where she sat attired in her unflattering uniform. Meagan was a level-one inmate, which meant that she was the least dangerous kind of offender. At the moment, she was considered special needs because of her pregnancy.

But she wasn’t glowing, the way an expectant mother should. Shadows dogged her eyes, and her long dark hair hung limply down her back. She kept her hand on her swollen belly, rubbing it from time to time.

Was she trying to comfort Ivy? Her due date was two months from now, and providing there were no complications, she would be allowed to stay in the hospital twenty-four to forty-eight hours after giving birth, before the baby would be taken away and Meagan would be returned to the prison population.

Tanner wished that he didn’t know so much about the system or about how newborns were brought into it. He wished his sister had never committed a crime and that he wasn’t beholden to help raise her child. But that was the way it was, and he had to learn to cope with it.

“I found two houses that I’m considering,” he said. “I just need to make a decision between them, and I don’t know which one to pick.”

“The choice is yours.” She sounded cautious about caring too much, as if it was too far in the future for her to grasp. “It’s going to be your house.”

“It’ll be yours and Ivy’s, too.” And he wanted her to feel as if she was part of the process. “I didn’t take any pictures. I should have, but I just got so overwhelmed with it all.”

“It’s okay. Just choose the house you like best.”

Trying to stir a better reaction out of her, he said, “The first one is on a really nice piece of property with a flower garden, a big green lawn and fruit trees. The guesthouse in the back has its own yard. It even has a fountain.”

She leaned forward, her interest piqued. “That sounds pretty.”

He thought about the owner and how pretty she was, too. “It’s weird, though, because it belongs to an old girlfriend of mine.”

Her eyebrows shot up. “Since when did you have a girlfriend? I thought you just...”

Screwed around? He decided not to fill in the blank. It was already perfectly clear as to what she meant. “It’s Candy, from when I was a teenager. I’m not sure if you remember her, but you liked her when you were a kid. In fact, you more or less idolized her.”

Meagan laughed a little. “Of course I remember her. She was like Miss America or something. Mom used to talk about her all the time. There are even some pictures of the two of you in one of those old photo albums Mom put together. I paged through them after Mom died.”

“I didn’t know there were pictures of us around.” But he hadn’t gone through the albums. He wasn’t keen on reminiscing. Of course he’d been doing it since he’d run into Candy, letting his mind stray in all sorts of directions.

Meagan’s voice cut into his thoughts. “As far I could tell they were from a school dance.”

When Candy had worn the red dress? Now he was curious to see them, to refresh his memory about that night in greater detail, but he wasn’t about to go digging through the storage shed where Meagan kept their mother’s belongings. He missed his mom, but being around her things didn’t give him comfort, the way it did for his sister. “If they’re from a school dance, then it must be my junior prom. That’s the only dance we went to. So, how did we look?”

“She looked like she just stepped out of a magazine.”

He didn’t doubt it. He’d been wildly proud to show her off, introducing her to anyone she hadn’t met before. “And what about me?”

“Are you kidding? You looked like a total goof.”

“Gee, thanks.” He rolled his eyes. “Spoken like a true sister.”

Meagan shrugged. “I wanted to grow up to be just like her.” She twisted her stringy hair. “Did I accomplish it? Is she a mess these days, too?”

“She’s still beautiful, and so are you.”

“Spoken like a true brother.” She glanced away, heavy with emotion. “A lying brother.” She returned her gaze to his, still resting a hand on her stomach. “Does Candy have kids?”

“No.” He noticed how many children were visiting their loved ones in this awful environment, though, and every time he brought Ivy back here to see Meagan, it would be a constant reminder that his niece would be one of them.

“So, she’s not married or anything?”

“She’s divorced.” From the husband he wondered about. The man who’d become the mystery Tanner shouldn’t care about solving. To keep Meagan from asking more personal, Candy-related questions, he went back to discussing the real-estate purchase. “The only concern I have is that her guesthouse isn’t big enough. It’s only one bedroom, so I’d have to hire a contractor to add another one.”

“Is that a major ordeal?”

“Candy said getting the permits wouldn’t be a problem.”

“Would the addition cost a lot of money?”

“That depends, I guess, on how you evaluate it. The other house I’m considering has a two-bedroom guesthouse already on it. But the overall price of the property is more.”

“So it balances out the same?”

He nodded.

“Tell me about the other house and what you like about that one.”

“Besides the guesthouse? It’s less maintenance. It wouldn’t require as much yard work. It’s newer, too. But it doesn’t have the charm, either. The guesthouse on Candy’s property has that storybook-type architecture.”

“Like the magic cottages in the stories Mom used to read to me?” She sighed, behaving like the dreamy kid she used to be. “I loved those stories. I’m going to read them to Ivy, too.”

His heart clawed its way to his throat. “Maybe I should buy Candy’s place.”

She snapped out of her gentle musings. “You don’t have to do that for me. Like I said before, you should choose the one you like best.”

“Truthfully, I don’t have a preference. I’d rather choose it for you and Ivy, and I think Candy’s place would suit you and your daughter.” The other house seemed dull by comparison. “I could see Ivy running around in the yard when she’s a little older, darting through the flowers and trees.”

“Oh, that’s sweet. I like that.”

“I like it, too.”

“Thank you, Tanner. For everything you’re doing for me and my baby.”