The It Girl: Team Awkward

‘Sophie was asked by the Sports department to put it up first thing this morning,’ Josie added as smugly as if Sophie had been asked to appear on the front cover of Vogue.

‘I take it you’ll be putting yourself forward to be team captain of the Puffins this year, Jess?’ Sophie raised an eyebrow. ‘Of course, there’ll be no competition for me – I’m going to be leading the Eagles.’

‘Actually, no,’ Jess answered calmly as I looked at them all in confusion. Puffins? Eagles? Had my school turned into a bird sanctuary over Easter? How had I missed this? ‘I want to put all of my focus on my Art project and my photography this term. So you don’t need to worry about me waving the winner’s trophy in your face when the Puffins win. I’m sure our captain will do the honours on my behalf.’

‘Oh per-lease!’ Sophie cackled. ‘The Puffins haven’t beaten the Eagles in years! Everyone knows you don’t have a chance. Besides,’ she looked me up and down, ‘it’s not like the Puffins have the . . . best team this year. Anna, I know you’re a Puffin. Good luck,’ she smirked. ‘I don’t think there are any plant-pot assault courses so you might not fail in every event.’ She turned on her heel and strode back down the hallway, with Josie laughing loudly next to her.

I looked at Jess in confusion.

‘Oh, don’t worry, I’ll fill you in about sports day later.’

‘Er . . . and the stern plant-pot telling-off you promised?’

‘Damn it!’

What’s wrong with you?

Nothing‘s wrong with me. I‘m concentrating, Jess.

No one concentrates this hard while Miss Brockley writes on the board in a language no one on the planet understands.

Yes they do. She‘s writing important words that we need to know for our end of term exams. And some people on the planet do understand French.

Some people like who?

Well, I‘m going to take a long shot and say that French people probably understand French.

Can you please tell me what’s wrong with you, so that we can hurry up and get to the bit where I tell you you’re ridiculous and then you realise that it’s actually fine? Are you worried about sports day? I told you I’d explain the whole Puffin thing to you. You don’t need to worry, the school’s just split into two teams.

Sounds weird to me – but no, I’m not worrying about sports day quite yet, although no doubt the fear will begin to loom soon.

Did Miss Duke say something weird? Was it something to do with the way you walk?

No, it wasn‘t a big deal, she just wanted to . . . Wait. What? What‘s wrong with my walk?

Nothing.

Jess! What is wrong with my walk?

Seriously, nothing. Stop passing notes. I’m concentrating.

Now I really am panicking. Why would you ask me if the headmistress wanted to see me about my walk?!

Geez, you’re such a drama queen. You just walk a bit funny, that’s all. Kind of . . . slumpy. I just wondered if she thought you had a problem or something that needed looking at. You know, in a caring way. Now tell me what’s bothering you. You have a funny look on your face. Is it Connor?

Forget what I’m thinking about Connor, now all I can think about is my ‘slumpy walk’.

Aha! So you were thinking about Connor! Spill.

It‘s nothing. I saw him this morning.

When?! What did he say???

When I came out of Miss Duke’s office. I walked straight into them.

Them? Who is THEM?

I mean him. Him. I think Miss Brockley is looking this way. Wait, no, she‘s looking past me. Hah, she definitely is. I‘m so stealthy at this. She’s none the wiser. What a dodo. Anyway–

‘What do you mean, you have detention?’

Why does Dad always have to make tiny things into such big deals? For example, that time when we went on holiday to the middle of nowhere in Ireland and as a joke I hid the hire car keys in a bush to make him panic. I couldn’t have predicted that I wouldn’t be able to remember which one I had hidden them in. I didn’t stop hearing about that for days.

And now here he was all angry at me because I’d had the courtesy to ring him to tell him I’d be late home for supper.

‘I got caught passing notes with Jess in French.’

‘And they gave you detention? That seems pretty extreme,’ Dad huffed. ‘Let me come in and have a word with them.’

‘In the note I called Miss Brockley a dodo for not realising I was passing notes.’

There was silence on the other end of the phone, and then a long-drawn-out sigh.

‘Fine. Come home straight afterwards, we have people round this evening.’

‘Who do we have coming round? Actually, never mind,’ I said hurriedly as Jess mouthed ‘lunch’ at me. ‘Got to go, Dad, see you at home.’

‘Bye, Anna,’ he said grumpily. ‘Try not to insult too many teachers this afternoon.’

I rolled my eyes, said goodbye and then hung up before heading to the dining room.

‘Why are you two always late?’ Danny grumbled, coming up behind us.

‘Duh, she’s an It Girl,’ Jess grinned. ‘It’s fashionable to be late. Anyway, Anna had to make a call.’

‘Don’t look too impressed,’ I said as Danny raised his eyebrows at me. ‘It was my dad.’

But as I sat down with my tray next to Danny I suddenly realised the whole room was staring at me and a spatter of giggles was coming from Sophie’s table.

‘What?’ Jess asked them, hands on hips. ‘Haven’t any of you seen a celebrity before? Play it cool, guys.’

There was an uncomfortable pause, and then everyone started talking again. I smiled gratefully at Jess. ‘Thanks.’

‘Whatever,’ she said, picking the mushrooms off her chicken. ‘They were probably just staring because of your walk. Nothing to do with any plant pots.’

‘Danny,’ I said, ‘do you think I walk funny?’

He shrugged. ‘Maybe a little. Not really. I’m not sure I’ve noticed.’

‘How would you describe Anna’s walk?’ Jess asked, picking up her glass of water. ‘If you had to use a word to describe her walk, what would it be?’

‘I don’t know.’ Danny looked thoughtful. ‘Slumpy?’

‘For goodness’ sake!’ I said as Jess raised her eyebrows victoriously at me. ‘That’s not even a thing!’

‘It is a thing. You have a slumpy walk,’ she said, with a smug I-told-you-so smile. ‘Will you tell me about seeing Connor this morning?’

‘Jess!’ I glanced around me nervously. ‘Stop talking about him so loudly.’

‘He’s not in here, I already checked.’

I craned my head to look carefully around the dining room. ‘You’re right. I wonder where he is.’

‘You should know that,’ Jess teased. ‘He’s your boyfriend.’

‘How has your morning been, Danny?’ I asked, attempting to change the conversation.

‘Oh you know, the usual, teachers trying to frighten us with exam talk,’ he sighed. ‘I watched such a good nature programme last night though. Did you know that a scorpion will attract a mate by taking her pincers in his and then commencing a dance of courtship?’

‘Well,’ Jess looked bemused, ‘that’s interesting, Danny. Has Connor done that to you yet, Anna?’

‘Done what?’ I played with my food.

‘Taken your pincers in his before commencing a dance of courtship.’

‘We did dance together at the Beatus dance last term,’ I shrugged.

‘Yeah, but all of us were dancing together then,’ Jess pointed out. ‘And he was doing a meerkat impression. I’m not sure that counts as a dance of courtship. We’ll have to consult Marianne. But tell us what happened with Connor this morning. You had such a weird face on in French class.’

‘Nothing, really. We just talked.’

‘No passionate kissing, then?’

‘No, Jess! Outside Miss Duke’s office is hardly a romantic setting,’ I hissed. ‘Stop talking about . . . kissing so loud! Imagine if someone heard you!’

Jess rolled her eyes but went quiet and Danny began to talk about scorpions again.

I was being honest: Connor and I had talked. But what I wasn’t telling Jess was that it hadn’t just been the two of us . . .

I was only in the headmistress’s office for about thirty seconds. She’d wanted to check whether if I was OK after the whole me-stuck-in-a-plant-pot-being-an-Internet-sensation thing.

‘You know . . .’ Miss Duke began, no doubt wondering how she could possibly comfort me, ‘. . . these things blow over.’

‘The Internet doesn’t help that.’

‘In this day and age I’m afraid that fame is a very difficult game.’ She sat back in her chair thoughtfully, like a wise owl. Now that I think about it, her bright, round eyes and pointy features do kind of remind me of an owl.

‘I’m not even sure why I’m famous. I haven’t done anything except fall into a plant pot!’ I shook my head. ‘Seems unfair, really.’

‘Well, if you feel like everything is getting too much for you,’ Miss Duke looked at me kindly, ‘my door is always open.’

I smiled at her and was getting up to leave, but she carried on.

‘Except for Friday lunchtimes, when Mrs Ginnwell and I play Cluedo. I’m afraid my door is firmly closed then. I need all the concentration I can get.’

I almost laughed, but then I noticed her deadpan expression, so I just nodded and hurried out of the office. That’s when I saw Connor down the corridor. He was talking animatedly with a girl from our year, Stephanie. I didn’t know her very well, and I definitely hadn’t been aware that Connor knew her that well either, but clearly he did. She was laughing out loud and tossing her very shiny hair around glamorously. Why hadn’t Connor ever mentioned being friends with her before?

Flustered, I turned round to walk the other way. But then Connor called out, ‘Spidey!’

‘Er, hi,’ I said, turning around. I could feel myself blushing all the way down to my toes. Connor had called me ‘Spidey’ ever since last term, when he had discovered in detention that I shared his love of superheroes and all things comic book. I was usually teased for my Marvel comic-book obsession – especially by Jess, who continued to call it my ‘weird, geeky Marvin habit’, despite me correcting her a hundred billion times – but Connor didn’t tease me one bit. He had even created a comic strip, called The Amazing It Girl, that was inspired by me. It was the nicest thing anyone had ever done for me.

‘You’re looking very furtive,’ he grinned as he strolled up to me. ‘Where have you been?’

‘Miss Duke’s office.’

‘We haven’t even got to the first lesson of term yet.’ He folded his arms and smiled cheekily. ‘That’s impressive, even for you, Anna.’

‘She just wanted to, um . . . she wanted to check that I was OK. After the . . . plant pot incident.’

‘Ah yes,’ Connor nodded slowly, a look on his face that I couldn’t quite work out.

Just then Stephanie and her impossibly shiny hair joined us. I saw that she had a cool, super short block fringe – I’d always wanted one and had considered cutting my long shaggy fringe shorter, but I knew I couldn’t pull it off. Once I’d combed my hair forwards to see if it would give me a geek chic celebrity look. Dad walked in as I was doing it and asked, ‘are you acting out War Horse again?’

I decided the look wasn’t for me.

‘Hi, Anna, did you have a nice holiday?’ Stephanie asked.

‘Um, yes, thank you. Not much happened,’ I lied, hoping that she was the only person in the world who hadn’t seen the plant pot video.

‘I felt like I was working the whole time,’ Stephanie said, rolling her eyes. ‘So much revision!’

‘Yeah, it wasn’t fun,’ Connor agreed. ‘But there were some highlights.’

I felt a flutter in my tummy. Was he talking about hanging out with me? He must be! He had just been doing revision or Art class otherwise. Oh my goodness, Connor had referred to me as a HIGHLIGHT. I couldn’t wait to tell Marianne and Jess!

‘Well, you might call them highlights. But they were quite stressful as well!’ Stephanie nudged Connor’s arm.

Well, that was a little uncalled for, I thought. Hanging out with me hadn’t been stressful! OK, fine, there had been moments of stress, like the time I got chased by a goose. But that only happened once and I was sure that Connor had just found it funny, not stressful.

‘We learnt a lot,’ Connor argued.

Very true. Next time, I was just going to surrender the bread to the goose.

‘Maybe, but I still think I enjoyed the milkshake bar more.’

Wait. There definitely hadn’t been a milkshake bar involved. What were they talking about?

‘Milkshake bar?’ I asked, as casually as possible.

‘Sorry, Anna, I should have explained,’ said Connor, turning to me. ‘Stephanie was in those Art classes I went to, and after class a couple of times we went to this amazing milkshake bar. It does every flavour in the world.’

‘You should come next time we go, Anna! Connor told me that you have a bit of a sweet tooth. They do Nutella flavour, and I know it’s your favourite.’ Stephanie smiled, hitching up all the books she was holding.

He’d told her about my Nutella love? I tried not to feel jealous of this girl who not only had very nice hair but was apparently artistic too, and who had spent her Easter holidays with Connor at a milkshake bar.

‘I had a Nutella milkshake once in your honour,’ Connor informed me proudly. ‘It was pretty good.’

The bell rang, echoing down the near-empty corridor.

‘Right, better get to class.’ Connor hitched his bag on to his shoulder. ‘Anyone walking this way?’

‘I am,’ Stephanie smiled.

Of course she was.

‘I’m going the other way,’ I said, in my most cheerful-not-minding voice.

‘See you later, Spidey.’ Connor smiled at me. ‘I’ll come find you.’

I nodded and walked away, glancing back to see Stephanie launching into what was probably another hilarious, sophisticated Art story that didn’t involve anyone being chased by a vicious goose. But just as my heart was sinking, Connor looked back over his shoulder, catching my eye and smiling slowly, and the butterflies in my stomach went sugar-high crazy.

Jess can be very secretive.

While we were in detention that afternoon I could see that she was working on something, but annoyingly she wasn’t sitting near enough for me to slip her a note as easily as we do in French. Mr Kenton had made us sit a couple of desks apart so we didn’t distract each other.

Like that could stop me.

I screwed up a piece of paper tightly and tossed it towards her desk. I missed. Jess didn’t look up.

‘Psst!’

She still didn’t look up. I saw how it was. Well, if it was OK for her to distract me and get us detention in the first place . . .

‘PSST!’

Mr Kenton looked up, and I smiled innocently at him until he slowly looked back down at his book.

More inventive measures were clearly called for. I folded a paper airplane, wrote ‘pay attention!!!’ on one of its wings and skilfully (I thought) hurled it into the air in Jess’s direction.

It went straight up and then just plopped back down pathetically on to the ground by my feet.

I’m almost FIFTEEN and I can’t even make paper airplanes.

In desperation, I threw a rubber at her head.

‘What the . . . ?’

‘Jess!’ I whispered enthusiastically. ‘It’s me!’

‘No kidding.’ She rubbed the side of her head and gestured irritably around at the empty room. Somehow even Connor, who had been in detention all of last term for drawing comics and not concentrating, had escaped detention today.

‘Are you practising French vocab?’ I asked in a low voice, glancing warily at Mr Kenton.

‘No.’

‘Science?’

‘No.’

‘Is it English? Are you going over some notes for the exam?’

She shook her head. ‘It’s my Art project.’

‘Geez!’ I exclaimed, a little louder than I meant to. ‘What is so good about Art?! I hear nothing else these days except for art, art, art!’

Mr Kenton looked up again and cleared his throat as Jess looked bewildered. ‘Miss Huntley, might I suggest you use this hour to actually do some work? I know that it’s far more tempting to throw rubbers at the heads of your peers and rant about creative subjects, but this is detention. I can’t bend all of the rules. I’m sure you have some homework to be getting on with?’

I nodded, flicking through some pages of notes and feigning interest in them until he went back to his book. Then I quietly tore out a piece of paper from my Chemistry book.

TOP SECRET

Jess, do you think Connor hasn’t kissed me because I can’t draw? WRITE BACK ASAP.

This time I got lucky. The scrunched-up ball landed on top of Jess’s pencil case. She rolled her eyes at me. ‘Read it!’ I mouthed, glancing warily at Mr Kenton. Luckily, he was now engrossed in his novel.

I watched Jess as she opened it up, sighed and then wrote what I hoped was a sensitive and intuitive answer to my love-life woes. The paper whipped past my nose and skitted across the desk on my right. I reached over and eagerly opened it.

You’re a loser.

When detention finally came to an end, Mr Kenton said, ‘You know, Anna, you shouldn’t let that YouTube video get you down. If anything, it’s a lovely insight into the life of celebrities! I’m rather inspired to get a set of palm trees to frame my own staircase now. They add a certain je ne sais quoi.’

‘Not a bad idea, Mr Kenton,’ Jess nodded. ‘Anna, maybe you should get Helena to put the palm trees on eBay! I bet you’d make a fortune.’

‘Excellent business thinking, Jessica,’ Mr Kenton said. ‘Gold star!’

‘They’re not palm trees,’ I cried, ‘they’re Dracaena Lisa plants!’ And I flung my bag over my shoulder and flounced out the door.

‘Word of advice, It Girl,’ Jess grinned as she caught up with me, ‘next time you make a witty comeback, try not to sound like the biggest nerd in the world. You just managed to make Mr Kenton look cooler than you.’

Note to self: kill Danny.

As we made our way towards the school gate, I caught sight of something that made my heart race about ten times faster than normal. Connor was standing right by it, rooting through his bag.

Jess sighed and shook her head as she noticed him. ‘Seriously? You guys kind of disgust me, you’re so cute.’

‘What?’ I played innocent.

‘You said he wasn’t your boyfriend! He’s totally waiting for you.’

‘Keep your voice down, Jess!’ I hissed. ‘He’s not my boyfriend. He hasn’t said anything about it and nothing’s, you know, happened. We haven’t even really been on a date, unless you count the goose incident.’

‘Just lean in and kiss him, it’s no big deal,’ Jess said a little too loudly for my liking as we crossed the yard towards Connor.

‘It is a big deal when you’ve never kissed anyone before. Anyway, stop talking, he’ll hear us.’

‘Hey guys,’ Connor smiled, looking up as we reached him. ‘How are you, Jess? How did the photography internship at the magazine go?’

‘It was great!’ said Jess cheerfully. ‘I’ll have to show you some of the work I did sometime. I’ve got to rush off now. See you guys tomorrow!’ She gave me the most unsubtle wink I have ever seen and jogged away, grinning.

I was left blushing at Connor. Then my phone beeped. ‘Sorry,’ I mumbled and dug around in my bag. I pulled it out.

SMOOCH TIME. Jx

Connor watched me, bemused, as I threw the phone back as if I’d been bitten. Did she have to use capslock?!

‘You OK there, Spidey?’ he asked.

‘Yeah, just . . . um . . . someone annoying messaging me,’ I sighed. ‘Fans, you know how it is.’

‘Sure.’

‘And, um, how come you’re still here?’ I asked as innocently as I could, hoping he might say something like, ‘I’m madly in love with you and I wanted to wait for you to tell you that. Will you be my girlfriend for ever more?’

He shrugged. ‘I was in the Art studio with Stephanie after school, doing a bit of planning for my Art project this term. I left, but then I thought I must have left my phone there, so I came back for it. I’ve just found it, though,’ he said happily, tapping his bag. ‘In here all along. Hey, this was great timing, I forgot you had detention.’

Oh.

‘I’ll walk you back home if you’d like? It’s kind of on the way to mine, after all, and it’s a nice day.’

‘I’d love . . . er . . . like, er . . . that would be cool.’

‘Right.’ He grinned and pulled a bag of Milk Bottles out of his bag. ‘So, how was detention without me?’

Distracted by my favourite sweets, I was relieved to find I could speak like a Normal Person again. ‘It was fine. Not as entertaining as when you’re there, though.’

He raised his eyebrows. ‘You and Jess didn’t just chat the entire time?’

‘She’s working on her Art project. And, you know, I’ve got lots of stuff to do. We were both pretty focused.’

‘Right,’ he chuckled. ‘All that stuff you have to do.’

‘Hey! I’m very busy and important, I’ll have you know.’

‘Oh, yes,’ he said, suddenly serious. ‘I forgot that you were Britain’s favourite It Girl.’

‘Second-favourite. Marianne is firmly in the lead, especially now that she and Tom Kyzer are a proper thing.’

‘Does it feel weird that you’re about to be the stepsister of someone who’s dating a rock star?’ he asked, looking at me quizzically and pushing back his dark hair from his eyes.

He was so nice to look at.

‘Anna?’

Oh my god. I’d been STARING at him.

‘Oh. Haha. Yes, well,’ I mumbled trying to remember the question. ‘I’ve only met Tom properly once, and my dad was so embarrassing then that I’m pretty sure Marianne will never bring him round again.’

‘Did your dad really ask him if he wanted to do a duet?’

‘A guitar duet,’ I sighed, recalling the moment in agony. ‘He actually said, “back in the day I could have been a rock star myself.” I almost died.’

‘Your dad’s amazing,’ Connor said, shaking his head.

‘Not when there’s a rock star in your house and he’s rummaging around in the attic for his old guitar. Then Helena told Tom the story about the time Marianne was little and she lifted her dress up in front of Madonna to show off her Disney pants, and I laughed so hard that I spilt my lemonade all over Tom’s shoes. To top it off, Dog nicked his wallet off the table and chewed his bank card.’ I bit my lip. ‘I don’t think any of us will be seeing Tom Kyzer any time soon.’

Connor laughed. ‘I missed chatting to you properly over the holidays, Spidey.’

He stopped and I tripped over my own feet before I realised that he’d stopped because we’d reached my front door. He’d MISSED ME.

‘I’ll see you at school tomorrow then?’ he asked.

‘Yeah. I’m glad I survived today,’ I chuckled nervously. ‘Plant pot incident and everything.’

‘Don’t worry about that,’ said Connor. ‘People will get distracted by something else soon. Plus, I think the plant pot video was an excellent publicity stunt.’

‘Connor, it wasn’t a . . . I mean, I didn’t do it on . . .’

‘Anna,’ he interrupted, winking at me. ‘It was an excellent publicity stunt . . . I think the whole thing is pretty genius of you. It was a brilliant way of cheering the nation, getting more followers on social media and guaranteeing more support for anything you do in the future. So if anyone else asks, I’ll say that it was an excellent publicity stunt.’