Mended Hearts

She jerked up, the shadow chased away by annoyance. “Maybe. Maybe not. I’ll meet you there. Eight-thirty.”

“Perfect.” He raised up the signature green-and-tan striped paper bag bearing Grandma Mary’s logo. “See you then. And thanks for the candy.”

He felt her gaze on him as he left the store, the bell jangling his departure. He headed left toward the hospital, but refused to glance back to see if she watched him stroll down the sidewalk.

Nope.

Let her wonder if he’d totally forgotten her the minute he stepped through the door, which he hadn’t. Give her something to stew over instead of whatever shadowed her expression.

Although he did understand the concept of shouldering burdens firsthand. His father’s illicit drug and gambling habits turned Neal Brennan’s brilliant mind into a disaster, nearly toppling their family business. Jeff intended to do whatever it took to polish the Brennan name until it gleamed.

Matt Cavanaugh’s sudden reappearance in the area didn’t make his goal easier, but Jeff refused to dwell on that new twist. He’d meet with Grandma later, get her opinion. And he’d run an internet check on his half brother, see what he could find. Good or bad, he’d face any showdowns with Matt well-informed.

And Hannah …

Hopefully he could establish ground rules with her over supper. If they were on the same page, perhaps they could jump-start the library fundraiser quickly. Start-up was always the most time-consuming part of fundraising. Between his grandparents’ and mother’s philanthropy, Jeff had seen that firsthand. So he’d get together with Hannah, make a plan and set it in motion. And the whole dinner with a beautiful woman thing?

Not too shabby either.

Chapter Two

“Dinner with Jeff Brennan? At The Edge? Oh, girlfriend, you are travelin’ with the big guns now.” Megan nudged Hannah as they crested the hill at the edge of town, late-day shadows beginning to lengthen.

“Stop.” Hannah scowled and increased the pace of the walk deliberately. Maybe if Megan was winded, she couldn’t ask questions.

“Have you met before?”

Not winded enough. “No.”

“Ever?”

“No. And don’t look at me that way. I’ve only been here a few years.”

“But he’s everywhere. Does everything. And not only because his family is like the royal family of Allegany County, but because he’s a people person. Jeff loves to be in the thick of things. A born manager.”

The last thing Hannah wanted was to be managed. “Whereas I prefer the background, thanks.”

Megan frowned, hesitated, then waded in. “You’re great with people, Hannah.”

“I’ve got nothing against people. I just don’t like getting involved.”

“But—”

“And I’m busy.”

“Do you need me to cut your hours at the store? Would that help?”

“Not if I want to continue to pay my bills.” Hannah started to surge ahead, then came to a complete stop, aggravated, wishing she didn’t have to explain herself. Explaining meant she might slip back into the dark waters of things she avoided. “See, that’s the thing. I love working at the library because it’s small. Quiet. I help a few people here and there. It’s perfect for me. If we make it all big and beautiful, I’ll be expected to do all kinds of things, all the time. I like things the way they are, Meg.”

“Why is bigger bad?” Megan wondered. “I would think you’d embrace the idea of helping more kids, more families, providing more books, more chances.”

Megan’s words struck deep.

Hannah had provided a lot of chances for kids back in the day. She’d gone out on limbs, taken the bull by the horns, encouraging, offering young adults a rare experience. She’d been a risk taker then, in her beautifully equipped classroom, before life flipped upside down.

She was a rabbit now. Emotional necessity ruled the cautious lifestyle she’d adopted. It suited her duck-and-cover personality.

“I’ll be on the committee if you’d like,” Megan offered. “Would that help? Then we could strategize while we’re at the store together. Kill two birds with one stone.”

“What horrible bird hater thought up that analogy?”

Megan laughed. “Don’t change the subject. What are you wearing Wednesday night?”

“Nothing special.”

“What about my blue sarong? The one I brought back from Hawaii?”

“Hmm. Show up at the library in a sarong. Perfect for children’s hour.” She flashed Meg a wry look. “End of story. And this discussion. Besides, I can’t wear blue.”

“What? Why?”

Hannah felt a blush rise from her neck and resented her fair complexion for the first time in several years. “We need another color.”

“You’ve lost me.”

Hannah sighed. “He said if I wear blue he’ll have a hard time concentrating on anything besides my eyes.”

Megan ground to a halt, pebbled stones skittering beneath her feet. “He said that? Out loud?”

Hannah stopped, as well, directed a bemused look to her friend and sighed. “He did, but it was most likely to throw me off track because he wants this project done. If he can’t weasel his way out of it and pawn it off on his sister.”

“Meredith’s back?”

“If that’s his sister’s name, then yes.”

“Huh.” Megan frowned and resumed walking. “I’ll have to call her, see what’s up. You’ll love her. She’s funny and down-to-earth. And she does great hair and nails.”

“Corporate boy’s sister is a hairdresser? Why did I not see that coming?”

“She loves it. And she’s wonderful, like I said. The Walkers aren’t your typical rich family.”

Jeff Brennan had seemed pretty typical earlier that day. Focused, frenetic and finite, a path she’d traveled once before. No way was she going down that road again.

“Is there such a thing as typical rich anymore?” Hannah asked. “There’s some pretty weird millionaires running around these days.”

“And some downright nice ones.”

Hannah laughed. “Present company excluded, of course. Although I hear candy-store entrepreneurs maintain their delightful normalcy because of their choice in wives.”

“Makes sense to me.” Megan offered agreement with an elbow nudge to Hannah’s arm. “And wear the blue. Call his bluff.”

A part of Hannah wanted to do just that.

Another part couldn’t take the risk.

The gold top Hannah wore said she had no intention of jumping into the water with him, metaphorically speaking. The fact that the soft knit looked just as good as the blue simply brightened Jeff’s evening.

Watching as she wove her way through the tables of The Edge’s second dining room Wednesday evening, it was impossible to miss the strength of her moves, athletic and lithe.

That inborn agility appeared out of step with her other body language. Her careful facial movements belied by nervous hands and the inward expression that shadowed her eyes intermittently.

Edgy hands. Cloaked expression. A rough combination, all told, reminiscent of his mother in the bad days of his parents’ publicly awful marriage.

He stood as she approached the table. The hostess smiled as she indicated a chair. Jeff pulled the chair out for Hannah, waited until she was comfortably seated, then sat in the adjacent chair.

“You had to choose that one, didn’t you?” She met his gaze with a quiet look of challenge. “Being across from me wasn’t close enough? Or intimidating enough?”

“I intimidate you?” Jeff unfolded his napkin, brow drawn, but not too much, just enough to let her know he could quirk a grin quickly. “Thanks, I’ll remember that.”

“Annoyed, possibly,” she corrected, looking more sure of herself. “Intimidated? No.”

“Good to know, although I was starting to feel pretty good about myself. I’ve been trying to intimidate my sister for years. No go.”

“And yet still you try.”

He grinned agreeably. “A brother’s job. Would you like an appetizer, Hannah? The Edge has great stuffed mushrooms. And the owner makes Shrimp le Rocco, huge shrimp done in a wine and cream sauce with a hint of Cajun, just enough to give it life.”

“Are you auditioning for the Food Network?”

“I’m a Paula Deen guy,” he admitted, smiling. “All that butter. Cream. Southern drawl. And she’s sweet but tough. Reminds me of Grandma.”

“Your grandmother is one strong lady.” Hannah looked more at ease talking about Grandma. She settled back in her seat and fingered her water glass, then smiled and nodded at the waitress as they gave their drink and appetizer orders.

The smile undid him, just a little. Sweet. Broad. Inviting. She had a generous mouth when it wasn’t pinched in worry.

“She is.” Jeff settled back, as well, surveyed her and sighed openly. “Which means you’re stuck with me, I’m afraid. My attempts to get Meredith on board fell on deaf ears. Seems she’s got other fish to fry.”

“Aha.”

“And your attempts? Still unsuccessful?”

She shrugged. “I didn’t try. There’s a part of me …” She paused, shifted her attention, then drew it back to him, reluctant. “That thinks this will be good for me.”

Good for her?

Jeff considered the words, the look, then chose not to probe. Seeing fundraising as therapeutic was beyond his understanding, but if they both had to be involved, at least they’d both accepted the fact.

Grudgingly.

However, sitting with her, watching her, eyeing the lights and shadows that played across her face, candlelight mixed with emotion, he didn’t feel all that grudging. He felt …

Drawn.

But he couldn’t be for two reasons: women of indecision annoyed him, which was precisely why he got on so well with his grandmother, and he had no time to devote to thoughts of a relationship.

If not now, when?

Jeff shut down the annoying mental reminder, thoughts of microchips, rare metal glazings and mobile communications taking precedence for the foreseeable future.

His grandmother was a thinker, doer and planner. Jeff followed her lead. Plan your work, then work your plan. He’d constructed his life that way, a goal setter to the max, doing anything to eliminate similarities to his narcissistic father. His appearance and affinity for inventive science labeled him as Neal Brennan’s son, but that was as far as the resemblance went.

Jeff pushed himself to be better. Stronger. Wiser. Although lately a part of him felt worn by having to be on the cutting edge constantly, he couldn’t afford the appearance of weakness. Not now. Not ever.

He leaned forward, elbows braced, hands locked, noticing how the freckles dusting her cheeks blended with her sun-kissed skin. “Hannah.”

She noted his shift and a hint of amusement sparked in her eyes, a look that downplayed her nervous gestures. “Yes, Jeff?”

She was playing him in her own way. He leaned closer. “Since we’re stuck with each other …”

“At weekly meetings.” She drawled the words, her tone teasing.

He sighed, then nodded as if pained. “For the better part of a year until enough money is raised.”

She met his look, but that small spark of humor in her eyes kept him moving forward. “Might I suggest we come to a mutual agreement?”

“That you buy me supper once a week? That sure would help my grocery budget.”

He grinned without meaning to. “We’ll put that on the negotiating table. Does that mean you’d cook for me once a week?”

“No.”

“Obviously we need to work on your bargaining skills. You never say no right out. It puts the other players off.”

“What if I’m not into games?” she asked. She eyed her water glass, then him. “Game playing isn’t my thing.”

“When it comes to raising funds, we’re all into games,” he assured her.

She sat back purposely.

“And when we’re talking cajoling benefactors, you and I will need to be on the same page,” he continued. “Which means we stay open to any and all ideas as if they’re workable, even if we know they’re not.”

“We lie.”

He shook his head. “Not lie. Improvise.”

“Lead people on.”

“Not in a bad way.” He studied her, and knit his brow, wondering. “As chairpeople, you and I need to appear open to others’ ideas even if we’ve already planned a course of action.”

“What if their ideas have merit?”

“We incorporate them, of course. But only if they don’t take us off track.”

His words quenched the spark of amusement in her eyes. “So as long as it’s your way, it’s a go.”

“No, not really.”

“That’s what you said.”

“What I said was spawned by your refusal to cook for me,” he shot back, hoping humor would soften the moment, noting her withdrawal with a glance. “You said no too quickly. If you’d said ‘I’ll consider that and get back to you,’ at least then I’d feel like I have a chance. And that’s how contributors want to feel. Like they’re appreciated. Considered.”

“So because I shot down your plea for a home-cooked meal, I’m being lectured on the ins and outs of fundraising?”

He sat back, confused. “Listen, I—”

She slid forward in her seat as if ready to do battle, a tactical move that surprised him considering her previous timidity. “For your information, I am perfectly capable of running this thing completely on my own. So feel free to take yourself back to Grandma and tell her I can fly solo, because it will be way more fun than dealing with a corporate know-it-all who pretends other people’s opinions matter when clearly they don’t.” She stood, back straight, face set, determination darkening her blue eyes. “And as for cooking you dinner, not only would you be wise to not hold your breath, you might want to consider a weekly grocery delivery service so the inconvenience of shopping doesn’t interrupt your goals and ambitions. Why should something as mundane as food interfere with total world domination? Let your grandmother know I’ll be glad to take this on independently. End of discussion.”

She strode out of the restaurant, shoulders back, head high, not glancing left or right.

Total world domination? Jeff sat back, mystified. Her reaction revealing two things. She had plenty of backbone, a trait he’d respect more when he wasn’t being publically reamed out over nothing.

And someone had done quite a number on her and he was paying the price.

He refused to glance around, not caring to see the surprise or sympathy the other diners might bestow his way.

The waitress appeared looking slightly stressed. “Uh-oh.”

“Yeah.” He sent her a look of bemusement. “Can I have the appetizers to go, please? Looks like I’m dining on my own tonight.”

“Of course. I’ll be right back.”

Her look of sympathy didn’t help his deflated ego.

Smacked down in public.

Ouch.

That hadn’t happened in … ever. Which made it almost interesting, despite the embarrassment factor.

Still … she hadn’t looked faint or weak or intimidated as she headed out that door after dressing him down. She’d looked strong. Angry. Invigorated.

Not exactly the emotions he’d been going for, but at least they were normal. Understandable. He glanced at his watch, nodded his thanks to the young waitress and tried to exit with his head high, fairly sure half the dining room was just too polite to stare.

They didn’t need to. He felt conspicuous enough as it was.

Chapter Three

She’d call Helen first thing tomorrow, Hannah decided as she kicked off her shoes in her apartment fifteen minutes later. If she had to embrace this task, she’d take the helm and do it alone. The idea of dealing with a power-hungry ladder climber like Jeff Brennan touched too many old chords. Her teaching success. Brian’s drive and goal-setting passions. The perfect couple when all was well.

No, being around Jeff nudged too many insecurities to the surface. She was better, she knew that.

But still scared. And scarred. Emotionally, if not physically.

The doorbell rang.

Hannah headed to the front entry, surprised. She stopped as her heart shifted somewhere closer to her gut.

Jeff stood framed in the glass, a to-go sack in his hand, his expression sincere, almost as if he was truly sorry for setting her off when he’d done nothing wrong except evoke bad memories.

Self-recriminations assaulted her from within. She opened the door, and sighed, letting the door’s edge offer support. “I shouldn’t have walked out on you like that.”

“Why did you?”

Hannah refused to open that box, although lately the cover seemed determined to inch off on its own, a concept that both worried and strengthened her. “You struck a nerve.”

“Sorry.” He didn’t demand an explanation, just stood there looking truly apologetic. He hoisted the bag. “I can’t eat these alone. I know you’re hungry, and I don’t want to start off on the wrong foot.”

The gentility behind this surprise move softened her heart. Meg had proclaimed Jeff to be a downright nice guy, invested in the community. At this moment, Hannah couldn’t disagree. “Come in.”

He smiled, not triumphant or teasing, but amiable and friendly as if he’d teased her enough for one night. A part of her wished she could play those getting-to-know-you games she used to be good at, but she’d lost that skill and had no interest in resurrecting it.

Get it back.

She sensed the inner admonition, felt the internal thrust forward and resisted, her fear of risk standing its ground.

“Do not be afraid for I am with you… .”

Isaiah’s words tinkered with her heart, her soul.

“I will strengthen you and help you… .”

“This is nice, Hannah.” Jeff swept the front room an approving look, then raised the bag again. “Here or in the kitchen?”

“The kitchen’s fine.”

“Lead the way.” He followed her, set the bag on the table, then faced her.

“I’m sorry about earlier. I shouldn’t have run away.”

“Interesting turn of phrase.”

She grimaced acceptance. “A trait I’m trying to change.” Tonight, with him here, delicious smells wafting from the to-go containers, a part of her longed to embrace change. And food. “I’ll get some plates.”

“Perfect.”

It wasn’t perfect, she knew that, but by coming here he’d leveled their playing field. Brian would never have swallowed his pride and come calling to make amends. She withdrew two plates from the cupboard and turned to find Jeff procuring silverware from the drawer alongside the sink.

“These okay?” He held up two knives and two forks.

She nodded. “Fine, yes.”

“Then let’s eat.” He drew her chair out, a gentlemanly gesture, then sat in the chair opposite her.

Hannah flushed. “You didn’t have to do that.”

“What?” He looked genuinely puzzled about her meaning.

“Sit over there. Here would have been fine.” She indicated the chair to her right with a nod.

He raised a brow in amusement. “If you’d prefer …”

“Not what I meant and you know it.”

The smile deepened. “I’m good here for the moment. The extra space gives me a buffer zone.”

This time Hannah smiled. His banter was tinged with a hint of compassion, just enough to help calm the encroaching waves within. Her therapist had told her she’d know when to test the waters, dive back into the game. Hannah hadn’t believed her then, and longed to believe her now, but mingled fears constrained her.

She wanted new memories. New chances. New beginnings. Wasn’t that why she’d come to Jamison in the first place?

You came here to hide. Nothing more, nothing less.

Then she wanted to stop hiding.

A rustle of wind brushed the leaves against the windows. The sights and sounds of fall leveraged her anxiety, but only if she allowed it to happen.

Determined, she sat forward, met Jeff’s gaze and nodded toward the food. “Will you say grace or shall I?”

He reached for her hand and it felt nice to have Jeff grip her fingers as he asked the blessing, his tone thoughtful, the strength of his hand a blessing in itself.

He smiled, released her hand and gave a delighted sigh as he opened the containers. “Since we’re main-coursing this stuff, I had them pack two slices of strudel, too. I don’t know about you, but I never have room for dessert if I eat a full meal, and Susan Langley’s apple strudel is amazing stuff. I wasn’t sure if you’d like raisins, so I got the one without them.”

“Thank you, Jeff.” She looked in his eyes and for the first time in ages didn’t question the sincerity and integrity in another person, or the veracity of their smile. She let herself bask in the moment and realized how good she felt to be there.

So far as the east is from the west has He removed our transgressions from us… .

She wanted to believe that, the sweet psalm anointing her, but she’d found out the hard way that simple faith was anything but easy.

And yet …

Something in Jeff’s look and his manner made her want to take the chance she’d been refusing to contemplate for years.

“You’ll know when,” Lisa had promised, offering her professional and personal opinion before Hannah moved east. “And when it happens, seize the day. Grasp the moment.”

Hannah hadn’t believed her; the thought that time eases pain was too simplistic to embrace then, despite the therapist’s assurance.

But maybe now …

“Try this.” Jeff speared a piece of shrimp, leaned forward and held the fork up, his encouraging look somewhat boyish and endearing.

She shouldn’t take the morsel. Sharing food was too personal, but she leaned forward, the moment charged with awareness. She paused at the last moment, rethinking her choice.

It’s shrimp. Nothing more.

Hannah knew better, despite her recent holding pattern, like a jet circling O’Hare in a snowstorm. But she took the bite anyway. The combination of cream and spices was melt-in-your-mouth good. “That’s amazing.”

Jeff grinned. “I thought you’d like it. Try another.”

She raised her fork, putting off another tidbit from his. “Feeding myself was one of my basic skills in college.”

“Where I expect you did very well,” he countered, following her lead, adeptly moving the conversation. “I did my undergrad and masters at MIT.” His interested expression invited her to reveal the same about herself.

“I was at Penn.”

“Philadelphia.”

She nodded. “My father and stepmother live there. That got me the occasional home-cooked meal.”

“Which always tastes better when you’re away from home. And you never fully appreciate the things of home until they’re gone.”

Hannah knew that firsthand. Her parents had split up amicably just shy of her ninth birthday. Both had remarried. Both marriages were still intact, but she’d never had a place to truly feel at home from that moment on. No matter which home she visited, a level of disconnect followed her as she figured out behavior that suited her stepfather and stepmother, a slippery slope for a kid. She’d hedged toward perfect, swallowing emotions, pasting on smiles, unwilling to make a scene, skills that turned against her later on.

As a science lover, she understood the intricacies of adaptation. What she didn’t quite get was how to turn it off and move ahead. And if she couldn’t do that, then all the adjustments in the world were of little importance because mere existence couldn’t equate with life. Ever.

“The quieter you get, the more I delve.” Jeff sent her a pointed look, his eyes amused but direct.

Hannah raised her fork in salute. “I only reveal things on a need-to-know basis, Jeff.” She leaned forward before hiking one brow. “And right now, all you need to know is that I’m amazingly grateful for this food. Thank you.”

“And the company?”

Ah, the company. She smiled, raised a glass of water and dipped her chin. “Even better.”

His grin said more than words as he sampled a piece of stuffed mushroom. Was his look of delight meant for her or the delicious food?