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The Love Trilogy
‘Reading about them or having them?’ Alex leant against the doorframe, looking too broad, too dark, too handsome for Cora’s girlish room.
‘Both.’ Lily tipped her head to one side and took the opportunity to really look at him, to catalogue the changes ten years had wrought in him. No longer a slender, pretty boy. He’d broadened out, become sturdier, rougher. Hotter. ‘It’s good to see you again, Alex.’
‘I wasn’t sure you’d recognized me.’ Hands in the pockets of his perfectly cut grey trousers, Alex cast a sheepish look at the carpet. ‘To be honest, I didn’t realize it was you until Cora told me. You’ve changed.’
‘Ten years will do that to a girl.’
‘Has it really been that long?’
Lily just nodded. No reason for him to remember, but she’d never forget. The last time she’d seen Alex, he’d been dropping her home after the Glastonbury debacle. His parting words – ‘Chin up. You wanted to go, you had fun. Own your decision and face the consequences.’ – had been the only thing to get her through the next two weeks of misery with her mother. And they’d stayed with her since. Somehow, some words of advice from a guy only four years older than her, a wise and worldly twenty at the time, had become a guiding principle in her life.
‘Cora tells me you’re moving home,’ she said instead, backing up against the whitewashed desk as Alex came into the room.
‘Well, back to Felinfach, at least. Mum and Dad’s old cottage is a bit ramshackle, but…’ He shrugged, a smile twisting at his mouth. ‘I always had an affection for the place.’
‘I heard about your dad,’ Lily said, remembering abruptly. ‘And your mum, last year. I’m sorry. I always liked them.’
‘I think Dad had a bit of a soft spot for you, too,’ Alex replied. ‘He always liked someone who did what was right for them and damn the consequences.’
Lily tried to smile. Was that how Alex remembered her? She wasn’t sure she could still remember that girl, these days.
‘So you’ve come to sort out all our money troubles?’ At least she’d remembered he was in finance. Faced with the reality of Alex Harper, facts were harder to hold onto. God, if she’d thought him crush-worthy at twenty, it couldn’t compare to him at thirty. Not that he’d ever thought of her at all. Or remembered her, apparently.
‘Actually…’Alex glanced away, then looked back, his eyes sharper. ‘I’ve got some new plans. A new direction, so to speak.’
Which sounded interesting. ‘Care to elaborate?’
He shook his head. ‘Not yet. Not until I’m sure where it’s going.’
She thought about pressing him for details, but from the way he darted aside, looking away, it was pretty clear he didn’t want to talk about it.
Alex sat on the bed, looking even more out of place against the pink ruffles, and patted the duvet beside him. ‘Come on, then. Catch me up. How’s the last decade been for you?’
‘I don’t know where to start.’ Lily left a good few inches between them when she sat. Somehow, she had a feeling being alone in a bedroom with Alex wasn’t a situation girls normally got out of with all their clothes intact.
‘How about telling me about your fiancé.’
‘Fiancé?’ Alex nodded at her left hand, and Lily blinked down at the ring she hadn’t designed. ‘Oh, that. Yeah. It’s… complicated.’
Alex raised an eyebrow. ‘Did he ask you to marry him?’
‘At the top of the Eiffel Tower on Valentine’s day.’ Lily sighed, remembering the way the other diners had stopped and stared when he got down on one knee, even as three other men were doing the same at other tables. They’d all had their pictures taken together afterward. It was, by far, the most conventionally romantic proposal ever conceived. Which was Edward all over. He knew the conventional, appropriate thing to do for every situation. And he did it, every time. Her mother thought that made him the perfect man. Lily had a horrible, growing suspicion that all it made him was predictable.
No, not predictable. Steady. Reliable. Dependable. All good things. She liked that Edward was the steady one. His steady job meant that she could pursue her dream career. Having Edward as a calm centre in her life made it easier for her to resist the flights of fancy and impulsive ideas she’d been so prone to as a teen. And when she was having a panic about the shop, or her mum, or life in general, Edward was the one to sit her down, stroke her back and remind her that everything was going to be okay. That she could cope.
Edward made her a grown up, and that was a good thing.
‘And did he give you this ring?’ Alex asked, interrupting her thoughts.
The ring, however, was still a sore spot.
‘Unfortunately.’ He frowned at her answer, and she felt compelled to explain, ‘I’m a jewellery designer.’
Alex winced. ‘Ah. He didn’t think you’d want to design your own?’
‘No.’ She really needed to stop sounding so bitter about that. She shook her head. ‘It’s okay. I understand. He wanted to have a ring to give me when I said yes, and wanted to choose it himself. It’s romantic.’
‘If you say so. Anyway, that aside, and this is the crucial bit: when he asked, and when he gave you this ring – did you say yes?’
No real way out of that one. ‘Yes. But…’
‘No buts. What, are you going to be one of those couples who get engaged but never get around to getting married?’
What would be so wrong with that? Why not just carry on the way things are, happy and content. Why does it have to be a big thing?
But then Lily thought about the way her mother was already planning the perfect day in her head, and the catalogues of invitation samples Edward had started leaving around the flat. It was a big thing to them. ‘Apparently not.’
‘Why would you want to be?’ Alex’s eyes were wide and disbelieving.
Oh, honestly. Talk about a double standard. ‘Don’t tell me you wouldn’t be sprinting the other way if someone told you that you had to get married this summer. The way Cora tells it, you’ve been running around with every single woman in the Greater London area for the last decade.’
‘Maybe I’m ready to settle down.’ The words were casual, but Alex’s eyes were serious.
‘Really? That’s why you moved home?’ Of course it was. Why else would he leave the bright lights and bonuses of the City? God, she was an idiot. Lily bit the inside of her lip. The way Cora talked about Alex’s life in London, it would be a pretty huge lifestyle change for him. She wondered if he’d make it stick. ‘Sorry, then. I’m just… I look at Cora, and how happy she is to be marrying Rhys, and I think… maybe I’m not cut out for marriage.’
‘Maybe you’re not marrying the right man.’
It wasn’t as if she hadn’t had the thought herself once or twice, in the dark of the night when the bad thoughts come, but hearing it in Alex’s calm, unconcerned voice made something sharp stick in Lily’s lungs. ‘That’s not it. He’s… Edward and I have been together since I was nineteen. He’s everything I ever wanted. I love him. And we’re happy. I just don’t see why that has to change.’
Alex threw up his hands in mock self-defence. ‘Sorry. What do I know? Back in town permanently less than a week, remember? I’m sure you know what you’re doing.’
But while his words sounded good, his eyes still said, Who are you trying to kid? ‘So, where is he today?’
‘He had to work.’ Jerking up off the bed, Lily headed for the door. ‘Sorry, I think I hear Cora calling me.’ Never mind that Cora was probably still having her ear bent by Evelyn; Alex didn’t know that. And Lily needed to be somewhere else, quite desperately. Somewhere where people wanted her to marry Edward. Not with someone who just made the restlessness rise up and try to break free. ‘Good to see you again, Alex.’
She didn’t look back as she shut the door behind her.
* * * *
Alex leant back on his elbows as he watched Lily’s blonde head disappear behind the door. Who was she trying to kid? No way she wanted to get married to this guy. So why was she going along with it? Sure, maybe she loved him like she said, but if she had cold feet about the engagement why didn’t she just say so? Just tell him what she needed.
What had happened to the Lily he remembered? The one who’d fight anything she didn’t like, tooth and nail? Maybe he’d never known her well when they were younger, but back then you only had to spend a few minutes in the same room with her to know that Lily never backed down from a fight, stood up for what she felt and demanded what she needed.
So, what had changed? The woman who’d sat beside him on the bed hadn’t seemed to feel anything at all except vague unease. Uncertainty. She’d seemed… lost, in her own life.
Well, even if Lily hadn’t talked to Edward about her concerns, Alex would bet she’d have spoken to Cora. Those two had talked about everything, endlessly, since they were little.
Jumping to his feet, Alex was halfway to the door, ready to go and demand some answers from his cousin, when another thought occurred. Why did he care? What did it matter to him if Lily got married or not?
It didn’t, of course.
It was just… He believed in marriage. He believed that it mattered, that it wasn’t something to be rushed into. Once he found the right person, he knew he’d be ready to commit for life.
His parents had, and they had gone on strong for almost forty years. And his brother, Gareth, he’d married the love of his life, given Alex two perfect nephews, and settled back to enjoy life.
It wasn’t that Alex was a romantic idiot or anything. He just thought marriage should be taken seriously.
Lily obviously felt differently if she planned to go ahead with marrying some idiot who didn’t even let her design her own ring. Not that it was his problem, or any of his business. But for the sake of the sanctity of marriage…
Maybe Alex should do what he could to help her see that settling for a life that wasn’t her dream was a really stupid idea. Just like his dad had helped him.
Decision made, Alex made his way to re-join the party. But when he reached the door, he found Rhys standing outside, looking confused.
‘Was that Lily?’ he asked, looking back towards the stairs where, presumably, Lily had escaped.
‘Yeah, we were catching up,’ Alex said.
Rhys raised his eyebrows. ‘Well, that explains why Cora was looking for her. Word to the wise, mate. She’s very, very taken.’
‘I know,’ Alex said, a little stung at the implication. He might have a bit of a history, but he was very strict about only getting involved with single women. ‘Like I say, we were just catching up. Been a long ten years.’
‘Yeah.’ Rhys studied him with a steady gaze. ‘Look, it’s none of my business anyway. But you know what your cousin’s like. She gets these ideas, however ridiculous, and then she decides to meddle. For my sake, save me from the meddling? It’s crazy enough here with all the wedding stuff. I swear, Cora hasn’t had a single thought that doesn’t have to do with the wedding in months. She’s probably only worried about you and Lily in case it upsets her table plan.’
Alex grinned. ‘Sure thing.’ After all, what did it matter to him who Lily Thomas married anyway?
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