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Christmas Secrets
“I know enough.”
“You only think you know enough.” His gaze captured hers again, and the noise and commotion of the sidewalk seemed to fade.
“I’ll sweeten the pot,” he said. “We’ll go to the penthouse. I’ll work my magic and put Zachary to sleep. Can Isabel stay for the evening?”
“You’re bribing me?”
“Absolutely.”
“Why, Cole? The jig is up. I know you were using me to worm your way into Coast Eagle.”
“Amber, I don’t need you to worm my way into Coast Eagle. I walked through the front door and got a meeting with the soon-to-be president without an appointment.”
“Roth’s not going to be president.”
“Good decision.”
“You just switch your opinion on a dime, don’t you?”
“I never thought he should be president.”
She didn’t know what to say to that. She didn’t care what Cole thought. Still, for some reason she was glad to hear him agree with her.
“You need to get out for a while,” Cole continued. “Take a break. Forget about everything.”
She fought a smile at the absurdity. “What I want to forget is you.”
His expression faltered, and she felt a stab of guilt.
“I’m sorry to hear that, Amber.”
She was sorry she’d said it.
Wait, no, she wasn’t. No good could come of her attraction to him. A date? The idea was absurd. He lived in Alaska, and her life was a mess.
The best they could hope for was a one-night stand. Which, when she thought about it…
Hoo, boy. She reached out to grip the brick wall.
“You okay?”
“I’m perfectly fine.” She paused. “No, make that confused. Why do you want to go out with me? And why do you still want to help me with Zachary?”
It took him a moment to shrug. “Why not? I like you, Amber. I like Zachary.”
“That’s too simple an explanation.” Amber raked her hand through her hair to tame it in the freshening wind.
“I’m not complicated.”
“I am.”
“It’s ice-skating, Amber. What could be simpler than ice-skating?”
“You’re trying to get your hands on our Pacific routes.”
“Only if you want to sell them.”
“I don’t.”
“Fair enough. Did you know you missed your train?”
It was pulling smoothly away on the tracks. He really was the most infuriatingly distracting man.
“My car is only a block away. What do you say?”
She wanted to say yes. She suddenly, desperately wanted to leave her troubles behind for a few hours and go ice-skating with Cole.
She gave in. “Okay.”
He grinned, and she couldn’t shake the feeling she’d been outmaneuvered.
Five
As they passed by the lit trees that lined the outdoor skating rink, Cole turned backward so that he was facing Amber. She wore a short white puffy jacket, blue jeans and bright yellow knit hat.
“Impressive,” she told him with a smile.
He was grateful that she seemed relaxed. “Hockey.”
Since it was barely below freezing, he’d gone with a windbreaker and a bare head. The fresh air felt good in his lungs.
“You’re a hockey player?”
“Snow and ice sports are big in Alaska. I also snowboard and ski cross-country.” He glanced over his shoulder to make sure the path was still clear as they rounded a corner.
“I swim,” she said.
“Competitively?”
“At resorts, usually in the leisure pool, sometimes on the lazy river.”
He brought up a mental image. “Impressive.”
“Yeah, I float with the best of them.”
“I was picturing you in a little yellow bikini. It was very impressive.”
“That’s just mean.”
“Why?”
“Because I’ll never live up to your imagination.”
“Sure you will.” His gaze took a reflexive tour of her trim figure. “Wait a minute. Do you intend to try?”
She laughed, and he loved the sound.
“Not this time of year,” she singsonged.
“If I come back in June?”
“Maybe.” She twirled neatly around.
“You’re pretty good yourself.”
“Flatterer.” But her smile was bright.
“You’re beautiful, too.”
“I’m not interested in a one-night stand.”
The statement took him by surprise. “Excuse me?”
“Just so you know. I wouldn’t want you to get to the end of the night and be disappointed.”
“Is that what you think this is about?”
He didn’t know whether to be insulted or just plain disappointed. He hadn’t invited her out to get her into bed. But he didn’t deny he’d give pretty much anything for an unbridled night of passion in her arms.
“You’re not staying in Atlanta,” she said.
“True,” he agreed, even though he kind of now wished he was.
“And you’re putting in an awful lot of effort flirting with me.”
“Also true.” But only because flirting with her was so much fun.
“So the options are limited.”
“Maybe I’m trying to romance the Pacific routes out from under you.”
“You know that will never work.”
It was true. Cole couldn’t imagine her falling for something so simplistic. Then again, he wasn’t remotely interested in the Pacific routes.
He and Luca were following a carefully planned and meticulously orchestrated expansion scheme for Aviation 58. It was on track, and he had no intention of deviating from it for the next few years. He’d never make a knee-jerk decision based on random availability.
“You’re great with Zachary, you know.” Cole didn’t want to talk business.
“You’re great with Zachary. I’m mostly treading water.” Then she frowned. “But if you’re ever called to testify, the correct answer is that Amber is fantastic with Zachary.”
“I’ve never seen such incredible natural mothering instincts,” he said.
Her frown deepened. “I’m not his mother.”
“I didn’t mean that,” Cole quickly corrected the innocent comment. “I only meant that it’s obvious that you love him.”
She skated in pensive silence for a moment, the lighthearted music and bright lights suddenly seeming out of place.
“I’m sorry,” he offered, moving back to her side, reminding himself that she had grown up without the love of either of her natural parents.
“He’s so young,” she said softly. “He won’t remember either of them.”
Cole reached out and took her hand. “He’ll remember you.”
“It’s not the same thing.”
There was a deep sadness in her eyes, and it wasn’t at all what he’d planned for her tonight.
“Hot chocolate?” he asked, nodding toward the strip of shops and cafés. “I’ll spring for whipped cream and orange brandy.”
Her expression relaxed again. “Sure.”
They coasted to a stop, exchanged their skates for boots and made their way through the colored lights and happy crowds. It felt natural to take Amber’s hand again as they strolled along the pedestrian street. He helped her pick out a stuffed dog and a soft rattle for Zachary. They waited while the clerk gift wrapped the toys, and Cole slung the package over his shoulder.
“That looks nice.” He pointed across the street to a fenced restaurant patio with padded chairs and glowing propane heaters.
“Sold,” said Amber.
They crossed through the crowds and were shown to a table near a festively lit garden.
He glanced at his watch. “I read there were fireworks at ten.”
“Perfect timing.” She glanced around. “I love it down here at Christmas.”
“There’s nothing like this in Juneau.”
“Too cold?”
“During the holidays, yes. We do fireworks on the Fourth of July, but they lose something since it doesn’t get completely dark at night.”
“Not at all?”
“A sort of twilight look around 2:00 a.m. But you can golf at midnight on the solstice.”
“I can’t even picture it. Do you like living there?”
“I love living there. Juneau has a great sense of community.”
“Tell me about your mother.”
Cole brought up fond memories. “She was very pretty. She was kind and cheerful. She worked hard. Looking back, I realize just how hard she had to work when I was young.”
“She never went after your father for support?”
“She didn’t want him to know I existed.”
The statement clearly piqued Amber’s interest. “Why not?”
Cole immediately realized his mistake in letting Samuel get into the conversation. He purposely kept the rest of his answer casual. “She thought he’d be more trouble than he was worth.”
Amber nodded her understanding. “I hear you.”
How she said it made him wonder if she’d had bad experiences with men. He wanted to ask, but just then, the waitress arrived with magnificent mugs of hot chocolate, decorated with whipped cream and chocolate sprinkles.
“Dessert in a cup,” said Amber with a happy smile.
Cole took the opportunity to shift the conversation away from his father. “Tell me about your dad.”
She thought for a moment while she spooned a dollop of the whipped cream into her mouth. “He was tall. He had this booming, infectious laugh. I remember him flipping pancakes in the air, and how he used to trot around the yard, whinnying like a horse, with me on piggyback.”
“Little girls like that?”
“I did.”
“My mom baked bread on Friday nights,” said Cole. “I’d hear her in the kitchen after I went to bed. She’d let it rise all night, then bake it in the morning. Best breakfast of the whole week.”
“I’m trying to picture you young.”
An image of Zachary came to his mind, and he hoped she wasn’t trying to picture back that far. He’d hunted the internet for more photos of Samuel, found many and he realized there was a significant family resemblance. Then he’d had a friend back in Alaska send him some of his own baby pictures to compare to Zachary. They were all but identical.
Amber took another spoonful of the whipped cream. “I can’t picture it. You must have always been old.”
“Old? Thanks a lot.”
“How old are you?”
“Thirty-two. You?” He already knew, but it seemed logical to ask.
“Thirty-one. So I guess you’re not so old.”
“Gee, thanks.”
She grinned. “But I’m surprised you’re not married, or at least in a relationship.”
“There’s no current or likely future Mrs.—” He caught himself. “Mrs. Parker. You?”
“Married?” she scoffed.
“I meant in a serious relationship?”
“Nope.”
“What about in the past?”
“These questions are getting quite personal.”
“They are, aren’t they?” He didn’t apologize or retract it.
She wrapped her hands around the mug. “Nobody of note.” After a pause, she kept talking. “I left home right after high school, worked days, went to school at night to get my accounting designation. I might not be a vice president, but my job at Coast Eagle is significant.”
He stirred the whipped cream into his hot chocolate. “I never doubted it was.”
“I oversee six branch offices and several dozen staff members.”
“Have I said something wrong?” He couldn’t figure out what had made her defensive. He had nothing but admiration and respect for what she’d accomplished in her professional life.
She took a sip. “Not you. Roth, I guess. And some of the other executives. Sometimes I think they assume I’m just like Coco. They all knew her, while most of them had barely met me before the crash. They seem to have forgotten that I was at Coast Eagle before she met Samuel. I sometimes get the impression they think Coco got me the job.”
He could imagine that would be frustrating.
“I decided the best defense was to ignore it,” she continued. “And to do a good job, hard work and success would prevail and all that.”
“Did it work?”
“Not really. And then the plane crashed. And now everyone thinks there’s a ditz at the helm.”
“They’re wrong.”
“They don’t know that.”
“Fair enough. But you know what I think?”
Her expression seemed to relax a little. “What do you think, Cole Parker?”
“I think they’d better learn. They’d better learn to respect your intelligence and your tenacity.”
Anyone could see she was the perfect guardian for Zachary. The judge was going to see that, too. And soon she was going to be in charge of all of their lives.
“You’re good for my ego, Cole.”
“I’m trying.”
“But, wow, did I ever get off topic.” She took another sip. “That was a very roundabout way of explaining that I didn’t have time for boyfriends. It’s not that I never had offers.”
“Of course you had offers.” He couldn’t figure out what made her so insecure. “You’re amazing. And you’re gorgeous. And I never meant for a second to hint that men didn’t seek you out. I meant… Okay, I was fishing around for the competition.”
She drew back. “Competition for what?”
“That didn’t come out right. I’m attracted to you, Amber. I know I’m not staying in Atlanta. But I think of this as a date. And I guess it’s a reflex for guys to wonder about who else might be out there in the wings.”
“There are no wings. I mean, I have no wings. At least none with guys waiting in them.” She closed her eyes and shook her head. “I’m making this worse and worse, aren’t I?”
Cole struggled not to smile. “You’re making it better and better.”
“Tell me some more about you instead.”
“Sure. What do you want to know?”
She settled back into the chair. “Women.”
The first volley of fireworks burst in the night sky, and Amber laughed.
“Timing,” she said.
“I wish my love life was that exciting.”
“Give.”
“Marcy Richards,” he said.
“She is?”
His memory was warm. “My high school sweetheart. Tall, lanky, long red hair, a few freckles. She was captain of the girls’ basketball team.”
“What happened?”
“Tragic story, really. Senior year, she met a guy from Skagway. He was in town for a tournament. He kissed her. I punched him. She cried. But then four months later they both went off to U of Alaska. They’re married now with two kids.”
“Do you miss her?”
“Not really. She’s my accountant, so I see her every week. She’s great. And so, it turns out, is her husband, Mike.”
“You’re saying you’re over the heartbreak?”
“I went off to flight school and had a series of short but satisfying relationships. Turns out, women can’t resist a pilot.”
“How short?”
“Hours, sometimes days.”
“That’s appalling.”
“I was recovering from heartbreak. I was young and vulnerable.”
“Vulnerable isn’t the word I’d use.”
He grinned. “You’d be right.”
“And now?” she asked, brandishing her nearly empty mug.
“A few dates here and there, nothing that’s ever turned into anything but a friendship. I’m pretty busy with Aviation 58, and Juneau’s population is not that huge. A lot of the women my age have moved on.”
“You ever think about moving on?” she asked.
He shook his head. “I love it there. And given how much Aviation 58 has grown, my roots are pretty deep.”
“Maybe you can find a nice girl in Atlanta and take her home with you.” There was a glow in her blue eyes that seemed to reach right down to his soul.
“Good idea. You doing anything for the next thirty or forty years?”
She set down the empty mug. “I know you’re joking, but that’s a pretty good line.”
He wished he was certain it was a line. He pointed to her mug. “You want another?”
“I need to get home so Isabel can leave.”
Six
As Isabel left the penthouse, Amber made her way down the hall to where Cole had gone in search of Otis. The dog had apparently plunked himself down in Zachary’s open doorway and gone to sleep.
She found Otis there, with Cole inside the bedroom, tucking a blanket over the sleeping Zachary. Cole rubbed a gentle hand across Zachary’s forehead before turning away from the crib. In the doorway, Amber stood to one side, her chest strangely warm.
“Sound asleep,” Cole whispered as he stepped over Otis.
The dog opened one eye but didn’t lift his head.
“Isabel said he slept right through,” Amber whispered in return.
“Good for him.” Cole stopped right in front of her.
He was close, too close, but she didn’t want to move. Instead, she inhaled deeply, letting his fresh, masculine scent fill her lungs. It was a fight to keep from reaching out to touch him.
“Hi,” he breathed.
She lifted her chin to gaze up at him, wishing he would kiss her, but knowing any more intimacy was a very bad idea. Her life was complicated, and he was leaving, and she needed to keep her focus on the court case. But the temptation to lean into his arms and forget everything for just a little while was almost overwhelming.
He brought his palm to her cheek, and the warmth of the contact seemed to flow through her entire body. Her breasts tingled and she parted her lips, subconsciously inching toward him.
His free arm slipped around her waist, and he slowly dipped his head to meet hers. “Is this just a kiss good-night?”
“I don’t know.” She grasped the sleeves of his shirt, anchoring herself.
“Fair enough.” His soft lips captured hers.
His kiss was everything she remembered and more. It was more than his lips, more than his tongue, more than his taste. Every pore on her body drank in his essence. Her heart rate increased. Her blood heated. She pressed herself against him, nipples beading against his hard chest, thighs molding to his, hands twining around his neck, into his hair then back again, tracing the planes and angles of his face.
She wanted to memorize his skin. She wanted to touch him everywhere, imprint every contour onto her brain.
Arousal swiftly pushed away reason.
Needing to get closer still, she worked her hands between them, struggling in the tight space to release the buttons on his shirt. In answer, his hands slid down her back, across her waist, cupping her rear, pulling her tight against his body, letting her know how strongly he desired her.
She stripped off her sweater. Her tank top followed. And she was before him in a white lacy bra.
He drew back and his pupils dilated, his breathing labored. He swore under his breath, then stripped off his shirt and backed her tight against the cool wall. He lifted her there, bringing her legs around his waist.
He flicked the catch on her bra, pulling it from between them, and they were skin to skin. She was in heaven.
His voice was a rumble against her mouth. “Amber?”
It was a struggle to speak. “Yes?”
“This is more than just a good-night kiss.”
“Yes,” she rasped. “Yes.”
He worked his way down her neck, kissing the curve of her shoulder, then the swell of her breast. His lips fastened onto her nipple, and her body bucked, fingertips curling hard into his muscular shoulders. He switched sides, and her head tipped back, legs going tight around him.
“Which way?” he asked.
“Left,” she rasped. “My left. End of the hall.”
He scooped her into his arms and paced to the bedroom door, pushing it open and crossing to the big bed.
There he tossed back the covers and set her down. In a split second, he was with her, covering her body with his, kissing her deeply, his hands roaming her skin.
She went on an exploration of her own, following the hard definition of his shoulders and biceps, to his pecs and his washboard stomach. She unsnapped his jeans. He immediately did the same.
Then he pulled back to look into her eyes.
Without a word, he dragged down her zipper.
She followed suit, the backs of her knuckles grazing him as she went.
He sucked in a tight breath, eyes as dark as coal while they watched her.
She tugged down his jeans, and he kicked them off.
He pulled off her pants, palms skimming across her silk panties, back and forth, until she twitched in reaction. She moaned his name.
He kissed her breasts, and her arms stretched out, hands clenching into fists. And then her panties were gone. His boxers disappeared, and he had a condom. Thank goodness he had a condom.
He was on top of her, pressing into her, so slowly, so exquisitely. She arched against him, wrapping her arms and legs around him. She’d never felt anything that came close to Cole Parker.
He smelled of fresh air and wide-open spaces. He tasted like chocolate and brandy. His callused fingertips were rough and hot as he caressed every intimate spot on her skin. His body was shifting iron beneath her hands.
His weight felt good. His thrusts were focused, and her body reflexively adjusted its angle to accommodate him. He whispered her name. Then his arm braced the small of her back, pressing them tighter and tighter together.
Everything else was forgotten except the sensations cresting endlessly through her body as she climbed higher and higher. Colors glowed behind her eyes while white noise roared in her ears. Her world contracted to their joined bodies, tighter and tighter, until the dam exploded. The colors turned to fireworks, and sound boomed like a symphony as Cole called out her name.
Her pulse was in overdrive, and she was dragging in oxygen. Her limbs lost all feeling as she sank deeper and deeper into the soft mattress.
“You still with me?” Cole asked from what seemed like a distance.
“I think so. I’m not sure. Are we in Kansas?”
He chuckled. “I was definitely over the rainbow.”
Reality floated its way back. “Oh, my.”
“Don’t second-guess,” he warned.
“That was a lot more than just a kiss.”
He brushed back her hair and looked into her eyes. “It felt kind of inevitable.”
She knew what he meant. Every second they spent together seemed to draw them closer and closer.
“Maybe it was good to get it over with,” she ventured.
“At least we’re not wondering anymore.”
“Were you?” she couldn’t help asking. “Were you wondering?”
“Absolutely. From the first second I laid eyes on you. That’s why I botched it so bad that night at the dance.”
“It was a rocky start,” she agreed. “But you rescued me. Then you rescued my shoes.”
“You hate those shoes.”
“True. But you do get points for trying.”
He skimmed the backs of his fingers along her side. “Are those points redeemable?”
His touch was distracting, and his eyes were taking on that dark glow again.
“For valuable prizes,” she told him.
He traced the curve of her hip. “What do I get?”
“What do you want?”
He seemed to hesitate for a moment. “To stay.”
A shimmer of anticipation warmed her chest at the thought of sleeping in Cole’s arms, waking up next to him, having breakfast together with Zachary.
“Are you serious?”
“Absolutely.”
“Okay.”
Cole awoke to the feel of Amber spooned in his arms and the realization that he had to tell her the truth. Up until last night, he’d been prepared to breeze into town, make sure Zachary was settled and breeze back out again. But things had changed. She had changed them.
She rolled onto her back, blinking her eyes in the dim light from the window.
“Morning,” he said softly.
A pretty smile grew on her face. “Morning.”
Otis whimpered at the door.
Then Zachary let out a cry down the hall.
“Is Isabel in yet?” Cole asked.
Amber craned her neck to look at the bedside clock. “Not for an hour.”
Otis whined more insistently and Zachary’s cries grew steady.
Cole grimaced. “I’ll walk the dog if you feed the baby.”
“Sorry,” said Amber.
“Not your fault at all.” He sat up, shaking off sleep. “We jumped from a one-night stand to an old married couple in the blink of an eye.”