How to Lose an Ex in Ten Days

How to Lose An Ex in Ten Days

Lottie Lucas

One More Chapter

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First published in Great Britain by HarperCollinsPublishers 2020

Copyright © Lottie Lucas 2020

Cover design by Lucy Bennett © HarperCollinsPublishers Ltd 2020

Cover images © Shutterstock.com

Lottie Lucas asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work

A catalogue record of this book is available from the British Library

This novel is entirely a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental.

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Source ISBN: 9780008353650

Ebook Edition © November 2020 ISBN: 9780008353643

Version: 2020-09-22

Contents

Prologue

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

Chapter 28

Chapter 29

Chapter 30

Chapter 31

Chapter 32

Thank You for Reading…

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About the Author

Also by Lottie Lucas

One More Chapter...

About the Publisher

To my parents—for never once suggesting that I get myself a sensible job.

Prologue

“Are you ready?”

The gentle squeeze of my hand brings my attention away from the window. Outside, the scenery rushes past in a blur of azure sky, sparkling sea and golden sand, just visible over the edge of the cliffs.

I look into my sister’s concerned grey eyes, and for the first time, I feel something inside me waver. With every inch the car advances up the winding hillside road, I’m aware that I’m getting further and further away from the life I used to have.

Everything’s going to change. I’d thought I was so ready for that; I was too excited, too swept up in it all to stop and think. But now, as I sit between my two favourite people, my oldest friends and confidantes, I half wish I could turn the car around.

“Of course I am,” my voice sounds overly bright even to my own ears. “This is an adventure! I can’t wait.”

Even so, I find my fingers clutching more tightly around the bouquet in my lap. A simple posy of almond blossom – all we could manage at such short notice. Even so, Rosie’s done an amazing job; my hyper-organised sister wasn’t about to let anything so inconsequential as mere time constraints get in the way of making this into a ‘proper’ wedding (her words, not mine). In fact, with more almond blossoms dotted in my hair, and the ivory maxi dress I found in a boutique back in Limassol, I almost feel like a bride.

Rosie opens her mouth to say something more but then closes it again, to my immense relief.

I know she wishes we’d waited a little longer. I know she has her doubts. But when he swept down onto one knee like that, in the middle of our graduation ceremony… I mean, yes, it was a shock for everyone, not least me. I can still remember it now, so vividly. The nerves as I stood on the steps, waiting my turn to go up and collect my degree certificate. The way the mortarboard wobbled on my head each time I moved – I had visions of it falling off, perhaps hitting the Dean in the eye as I reached forward to shake his hand. Didn’t I hear about someone once who actually managed to knock themselves out with their mortarboard? They threw it up into the air and the sharp point of it hit them on the top of their head, and…

And then they were calling my name, the sound ricocheting around the cavernous hall.

“Belle Delphine.”

Someone nudged me in the back and I lurched forward, into the blazing spotlights which shone mercilessly onto the stage. I could see Ed walking away in front of me, certificate already clutched in his hand. I watched the back of his shoulders, using them as my anchor. And then he turned, and he was … walking back? I froze, my hand halfway extended towards the Dean, who was looking equally perturbed. For a moment I wondered if it was a trick of the light, but no, he was definitely coming back towards me, his gaze fixed on mine as the distance between us lessened with each purposeful stride.

A murmur rippled through the crowd. I could hear someone behind me in the wings hissing, “He’s going the wrong way. Why is he going the wrong way?”

And I… I was still frozen. Watching him advance ever closer, unsure if the fluttering feeling in my chest was more horror or anticipation. Because the one thing I’d learned in the short time we’d been together was that with Ed, you never knew what to expect. When I was with him, I felt alive like I never had before. I also felt more anxious than I ever had before. He was dazzling, brilliant… and wholly unpredictable.

“What are you doing?” I demanded in an undertone once he was within earshot, uncomfortably aware that the sound was probably carrying in the echoing old hall. “Are you crazy? Get off the stage!”

“I’ve just had a thought,” he said simply. “I thought you might like to hear it.”

I could feel my face beginning to burn under the avid gaze of so many onlookers. Somewhere, out in the blurred sea of faces, Rosie was sitting. I could practically feel her outrage from here.

“What… right now?”

My voice held a distinctly strangled edge but he didn’t appear to notice.

“Why not? This is the first day of the rest of our lives, isn’t it?” He took my hand, which was still hovering in mid-air, and looked at me with eyes the colour of a twilit sky. “I think we should get married.”

I stumbled over my own feet, even though I was standing perfectly still. My mortarboard lurched to one side.

“That’s not funny, Ed,” I gasped.

“I’m deadly serious. Look.”

And the next thing I knew, he was down on one knee. There was a collective intake of breath from the crowd. The Dean coughed awkwardly.

“Marry me, Belle.” Ed flung out his arms, a grin spreading across his boyish face. “Come on, what do you say?”

I just stared at him speechlessly. My mind seemed to have given up working all together.

They say that women always know when a proposal is on the way. But I couldn’t have been more stunned if I’d tried. Ed and I… we were so new. A matter of months. Intense, magical, life-changing months, granted, but still…

I could feel the weight of expectation, like a physical force. The hall had gone utterly silent, everyone leaning forward to hear what I would say. I took a breath, looked into Ed’s blue eyes, and teetered on the brink of my future.

“Yes.” The word rushed from my lips of its own accord. I certainly didn’t recall deciding to say it. But then I had, and it seemed like it was the right choice because the entire room exploded into a cacophony of cheers. And then Ed was kissing me and the sound became even more deafening.

“It’s so romantic,” one of the lecturers whispered to the Dean, dabbing at her eyes with a tissue.

“It’s all so romantic,” Tess chimes in supportively now, jolting me out of my memories as she smooths over the tense beat of silence which has settled within the car. She’s good at that, Tess; she always knows how to say the right thing. She rearranges one of the blossoms in my hair with artistic precision. “There. You look absolutely stunning, Belle. He’s going to be knocked off his feet when he sees you.”

The car crunches to a halt at the top of the hill, sending up little clouds of dust from the packed dirt road. As I step out behind Rosie, trying to keep the hem of my dress off the ground, the intensity of the midday sun beats down upon my shoulders. The air is tinted with the heady scent of pine mingled with salt blowing off the ocean below, and as I straighten up to look around me, every single remaining doubt in my mind just melts away.

This is why I said yes. The whitewashed chapel with its blue domed roof sits perfectly on the crest of the hill, with panoramic views all around. Hot pink bougainvillea clambers across the front of the squat little building, hanging down across the doorway like a curtain.

It’s perfect, every inch of it. It’s paradise. It’s the sort of thing only he could have come up with. If it had been left to me… well, I don’t know what I’d have done. I didn’t exactly have a lot of time to think about it. But it wouldn’t have been this. I would certainly never have suggested that we didn’t wait, that instead we just jump on a plane to Cyprus. A spontaneous wedding, as spontaneous as he is. The very reason why I love him.

And suddenly, I really can’t wait to see him. I can already picture him standing at the altar. He’ll be wearing his cornflower-blue suit, the one that brings out the colour of his eyes. It’s pretty much the only suit he possesses, so that’s a fairly safe bet. His dark blond hair will be falling over his forehead as usual. He’ll turn and smile, because he’s not the sort to wait with his back to me while I walk up the aisle. And when he does, that dimple will appear in his cheek, and I’ll fall for him all over again, as I have every single time he’s smiled at me for the past ten months.

Rosie and Tess link arms with me on either side as we navigate the last few metres of stony ground which lead up to the church. It’s hard going, and not for the first time I begin to wish we’d gone for flat sandals like I’d suggested. But there’s only so much informality my sister can take; I think it would have finished her off altogether if I’d insisted.

A figure moves out of the deep shadows which encircle the doorway.

“Leo,” Rosie hisses, as we approach. “What are you doing out here? You’re supposed to be inside with Ed.”

“Well…” Now we’re closer, I feel a small tremor in my glowing self-confidence of a moment ago. I’ve never seen Leo look worried before. He casts a quick glance in my direction. “There’s been a small delay, that’s all.”

That’s diplomatic speak for something’s gone wrong, even I know that.

“You mean he’s not here yet?” Rosie shrieks. Then she glances at the door of the church, which is wide open, and drops her voice. “He’s only staying in the village. It’s a two-minute walk away.”

She arranged it that way on purpose. She knew he’d be late. He’s always late.

“Why weren’t you with him?” Rosie’s demanding now. Leo tugs at the neck of his shirt. He must be roasting in that dark navy suit and the full power of Rosie’s ire can’t be helping. Nonetheless, he’s used to it by now. God knows they’ve been together for long enough.

“He wanted to be by himself for a few moments,” he replies calmly. “He must have just… lost track of time.”

Tess is nodding vigorously as though she has some inside confirmation that this is exactly what has happened.

There’s a tense, anxious silence during which they all dart worried looks between each other, apparently under the impression that I won’t notice.

“Oh, for goodness’ sake,” I burst out, exasperated. “This is ridiculous. I’ll go and look for him.”

“Oh no you won’t,” Rosie yanks me back with such force she nearly rips my arm out of its socket. “He can’t see you before the wedding.”

“You know we’ve never cared about any of that, Ro.”

“I’ll go,” Leo volunteers quickly, after a look at Rosie’s mutinous expression. “I’ll be faster.”

The wait seems to go on forever, although in reality it can only be about ten minutes or so. The three of us hover around outside under the shade of the pine trees. I wanted to go in to the church, not least because I’d be willing to bet anything that Mum is already subjecting the priest to her unwanted attentions, but Rosie won’t hear of it. And for once, I haven’t got the energy to argue with her.

Eventually, Leo comes striding back into view. For a heartbeat, I wait to see the familiar dark blond head behind him, the flash of cornflower-blue linen. But it’s not there. Leo’s on his own.

As he draws closer, I almost do a double take, wondering if the heat’s beginning to affect my vision. I’ve never seen him so lacking in composure. His hair is standing on end, as though he’s been running his hands through it.

“Belle, he’s not there.”

Almost of its own accord, my heart begins to thud in my chest, even as I tell myself that there’s a perfectly innocent explanation. I force a laugh.

“He’ll have gone for a walk or something and got lost. You know what he’s like.”

He’ll turn up, I reassure myself firmly. Any moment now, he’ll come around the corner with that gorgeous lopsided grin of his, full of apologies for being late. He’s done it so many times before.

“No, you don’t understand. I mean he’s gone.” Leo looks anguished. “His room’s empty. And the rental car’s gone too. He must have taken it.”

Suddenly, I’m feeling dizzy. I lean back against the trunk of the pine tree, no longer caring about my dress.

“That can’t be right,” Rosie insists, although she’s gone uncharacteristically pale. “There must be another—”

“There isn’t.” With a ragged sigh, Leo turns to me. “Belle, I’m sorry, but I don’t think he’s coming.”

His words sound as though they’re travelling from far away. It’s so hot; I can feel the heat rushing through my body in waves, shooting up into my head. Black spots are dancing in front of my vision.

“No.” My voice comes out thickly. “No, he wouldn’t do that.”

“Belle?” Tess clasps my arm. “Maybe you should sit down.”

But I shake her off, already moving forwards. My shoes catch on the uneven ground, slowing me down, and I kick them off, gathering my skirt up in my hand so I can break into a run.

He wouldn’t do this. He wouldn’t do this.

The words pound in my skull as I pick up momentum going down the steep, twisting hill which leads into the village. Sharp stones stab into my bare soles, but I scarcely notice. My entire focus is on the blue door at the end of the street.

The village is deserted at this time of day, everyone having retreated inside to escape the searing sun. It radiates off the white painted facades of the buildings, creating a dazzling, disorientating effect which makes my head spin.

Finally, I reach my target. I grasp the handle; it’s hot, and the metal burns my palm, but I ignore it, flinging open the door. It scrapes across the stone floor within, carving a groove through the rough surface.

The downstairs of the cottage is shadowed, silent. And empty. My heart leaps into my throat, and I will my nerves into steadiness, turning towards the wooden ladder which leads to the upper floor.

“Ed?” I poke my head through the gap, horrified at the way my voice shakes. “Are you here?”

A bare room stares back at me. Leo was right; he really has left nothing behind. No clothes slung across the bed, no toothbrush in the bathroom. The great irony is that he always manages to forget something; he loses things left, right, and centre. And yet, today, of all days… it’s like he was never even here.

I traipse back through the village in a daze. I’m not even bothering to lift the hem of my dress off the ground anymore; instead, it drags in the dust. I don’t know what to think; it’s like there’s a torrent of emotion, of pain, somewhere beneath the surface, just waiting to be unleashed, and yet…

He wouldn’t do this. Not to me.

Everything feels unreal. The blazing sun on my head, the church on the top of the hill, the people gathered in a nervous cluster in front of it. The people I know so well, suddenly looking like strangers. Looking at me like I’m a stranger, like they don’t know how to act, what to say… it’s all too awful.

“Belle…” Rosie begins.

I hold up a hand to silence her. My mind is racing, turning over every possibility. I mean, the packing… It doesn’t mean he’s gone, does it? Maybe he’s booked us a honeymoon suite somewhere, and he’s driven off to prepare it for later. Lost track of time, like Leo said.

The thought sustains me; I cling to it like a life raft. I can’t imagine the worst; I just… can’t. Everyone else has already decided; I can tell it by their faces. And if I allow myself to doubt him, to condemn him… well, what’ll be left?

“He’ll be here.” I’m amazed at how strong my voice sounds.

Tess’s eyes widen, then dart across to Rosie for guidance. Ro sighs.

“Belle, I understand that you don’t want to believe it…”

Her face is soft, pitying. So unlike my sister, who always says it like it is. I can’t bear it. I look away, not wanting to see.

“He’ll be here.” Even I can hear the stubborn desperation which tinges my voice. “And I’m not moving until he comes.”

Selecting a rock, I sit down. It’s not exactly comfortable, but that’s the least of my concerns right now.

“Belle…” This time it’s Leo’s turn to look uneasy.

“You can all go if you want.” I prop my chin on my hand, squinting down the road for any signs of a car, the tell-tale puffs of dust rising from the loose surface. “I don’t expect you to stay.”

They all share a look. I can just about see it out of the corner of my eye. But more than anything, I can sense it. I hold my breath.

“Of course we’ll stay.” Rosie settles down next to me, not even pausing to survey the rock with distaste as she usually would. “We’ll stay for as long as it takes.”

I don’t know how long we sit here for but gradually, the sun begins to sink in the sky, making the white walls of the church glow pink and amber. The vicar passes us on his way home with an apologetic look which I do my utmost to ignore. Mum takes Gran back to the hotel, promising to return as soon as they get a call from us. And still I sit there, trying not to think. Just hoping.

It’s dark by the time Rosie finally touches me on the arm.

“Enough, Belle. Let’s get you back. You’re freezing.”

It’s only then that I realise she’s right. I’m shivering violently in my thin dress. I try to speak, then find that I can’t. It’s like all the voice has gone out of me, along with all the light of the day. So I just nod. And in that moment, I release my grip on every dream I had for the future.

Leo drapes his jacket over my shoulders. Rosie takes one of my arms, Tess the other. And together, we begin the long walk back down the hill.

Chapter One

“Delphine? Are you with us?”

Steve’s booming voice, accompanied by the sound of meaty fingers clicking imperiously next to my ear, makes me sit bolt upright. The sight of dazzling sunshine on whitewashed walls dissolves from my mind’s eye, to be replaced with the familiarly dingy outline of the Illuminator newspaper’s office. It’s even worse than usual on a day like this, with the rain lashing down from a mercilessly leaden sky – a typically British May day, the sort that could easily be mistaken for February if one didn’t have the benefit of a calendar to prove otherwise.

Steve’s still glaring down at me expectantly, hands on hips. His shirt is half untucked, as it permanently seems to be, and his tie – faded pink spots against a brown background, which I suspect came with the shirt – has that same spot of ketchup on it which has been there since the day I first met him six years ago.

“I was just… thinking about this article I’m writing,” I lie hastily. Luckily, I’ve never been ashamed to bluster my way out of a situation. I’ve had a lot of practice. When I introduce you to my family, you’ll begin to understand why. I frown at my screen in what I hope is an intelligent manner. “There’s a lot of… nuance there. Lots to consider.”

His gaze flickers disbelievingly to my screen, where the headline, “Streetlamp Timers to be Altered in Bid to Cut Energy Costs” is clearly visible in stark black font.

All right, so perhaps I misjudged that one. I resist the impulse to shrink down into my chair.

“It will impact a lot of people, you know,” I add staunchly. “They might fall into potholes, or… or… get attacked by foxes!”

What am I talking about? Why don’t I just stop before I make it any worse?

Steve’s heavy eyebrows have been descending further and further down his forehead with every new word out of my mouth. By now, his eyes have almost completely disappeared.

“You’re a terrible liar, Delphine,” he says flatly. “Has anyone ever told you that?”

Not for the first time, I privately wonder if he even knows my first name. I’ve certainly never heard him use it.

“It has been mentioned on occasion,” I admit dolefully.

For a moment, I think I see the edges of his lips twitch. But within the space of a blink, his face is as dour as ever once more. I must have imagined it, then.

“Daydream on your own time in future,” he snaps. “If I catch you again there’ll be hell to pay.”

He says that every time so I’m not unduly worried. One day, maybe I’ll actually find out what this hell is that I’m expected to pay. Then again, maybe he’ll just keep throwing idle threats about the place.

“Tut tut,” Darren snipes gleefully from the desk next to mine, as Steve shuffles away out of earshot, presumably to terrorise someone else. “Caught slacking again, Delphine. You don’t do yourself any favours, do you?”

“Shut up, Darren,” I snap. Usually, I wouldn’t let him get to me, but today I’m feeling flustered. I’m annoyed with myself, not because I lost concentration – I mean, streetlamp timers, for goodness’ sake; that would challenge anyone’s attention – but because of where I found myself. Back in Cyprus, with my white dress fluttering around my ankles and almond blossom in my hair. I hardly ever think about that day anymore. I’ve long since trained myself not to; it belonged to another lifetime. Another person. I’ve become very good at pushing it to the back of my mind.

But the problem is that today isn’t just any old day, no matter how much I might try to pretend otherwise. Today’s the day. Six years ago, on this very date, my life changed forever. I changed forever.

And suddenly, it feels like no time has passed at all, like the distance I’ve put between myself and that fateful day is reduced to nothing. Like all of the work I’ve done to move on, to grow into a new person, to build a solid foundation for myself… it’s nothing more than a castle built of sand, swept away by the breeze of past recollection. All of the pain, the old feelings… they’re still there, pulsing vividly in my chest, in my soul.