Destination Thailand

‘It’s easily done, babe.’ Marie paused. ‘OK, I’m going to be real with you for a second, and don’t get mad. I hadn’t wanted to say anything because, you know, the whole not getting married thing, but actually, hun, you’ve changed. Going away with you last week reminded me what the real Georgia was like. Not the one who fusses over Alex, who stresses about table runners and ruddy place mats. Not the one who checks the weather to see if they can put their washing out rather than if it’s hot enough to head to a beer garden, not the one who pretends to enjoy eating kale and drinking pomegranate juice. You never used to be like that, but over time you’ve changed. So maybe you did get lost along the way, but now it’s like you’ve been given a ticket to start again, to reinvent yourself and do exactly what you want. Not go along with what Alex likes, or follow Catrina’s direction, but actually think: what does Georgia Green want to do?’

‘I guess,’ I mumbled tearing the moist edges of the beer mats in front of me. She was right, about all of it. Kale is bloody nasty.

‘I’m serious hun, if I was in your situation, but obviously minus a child, then I’d be out of here faster than when Big Claire orders her kebab at closing time. The world is your oyster. Go and grab it by the pearly balls!’

*

‘Oh hello, I’ll be with you in just one tic. Oh you silly bugger just work!’ A woman was wrestling with an ancient printer almost half her petite size. Papers were strewn everywhere and a strange gurgling noise was blaring from the knackered machine. ‘This is why I write everything down. Don’t trust these impetuous things. You know where you are with a paper and pen.’ She ran a wrinkled hand through her grey hair, flattening down loose strands that had formed a halo in the dust-particled light streaming through the window.

I’d taken Marie’s advice and left the pub having googled nearby travel agents, one I hopefully wouldn’t be humiliated in. ‘Have you changed the ink recently?’ I suggested stepping over documents flung on the floor to get a closer look. ‘We used to have the same model at work and all it needed was a good whack. Like this.’ Without thinking I thumped down hard on the lid. It wheezed to life then began churning out copies like brand new.

‘Oh my days. Thank you so much. Do you know how long I’ve been faffing with this? Turning it on and off again, trying different paper and I never once thought to do that.’ She beamed a genuine heartfelt smile at me.

‘No problem. Glad to be of service.’

‘So now that’s working, I can properly introduce myself and make you a cup of tea, the least I can do for saving my sanity!’ She wiped her hands on her trousers and came round from behind the desk, cautiously placing her pale pink court shoes amongst the carpet of paper between us. ‘Welcome to Making Memories. Owner, explorer and technology-phobe Trisha at your service! How can I help you?’ She stuck her ink-splatted hand out to me.

This small slightly sweating woman was a world away from the intimidating chimps at the other travel agency. Trisha was more like someone’s grandma. In fact, how had she not yet retired? Her cotton wool-coloured hair was loosely pulled into a low chignon and gold necklaces jangled against her crinkly tanned neck. She was wearing a smart trouser suit with a name badge and smelled like incense and sun lotion.

I shook Trisha’s hand and smiled down at her. ‘Hi. Georgia. Wannabe backpacker, gherkin hater and printer fixer who would love a brew,’ I said gratefully.

‘Coming right up! Eurgh I hate gherkins too, why ruin a perfectly good burger by plonking slimy bogey-coloured strips on the top?’

‘Exactly!’

Trisha smiled. ‘Oh, and please excuse the mess, usually there are two of us here but Deidre’s had to take some time off. To be honest I’m not sure if she’s coming back. Her son’s just had a baby you see, a little girl, so now it’s babies rather than brochures,’ she chuckled. ‘I’m so pleased for her but I could probably do with another pair of hands around the place, especially where modern technology is involved.’ She laughed lightly, awkwardly hiding some dirty mugs behind a framed picture of a handsome young man grinning by the Empire State Building. ‘I guess it’s good to keep busy though. Right, now for tea.’

Even though this shop had a prime position just off the packed high street, I’d walked past it every day not giving it a glance. It was a beautiful old room. I remember my dad telling me that there used to be an old bank on this street, I guess a few of these smaller shops must have been born from spare bank rooms when it moved location. Looking past the messy stacks of paper, a striking ornate marble fireplace drew my eyes, my feet sank into the faded, thick plum-coloured rug that partially covered decorative floor tiles, and large lanterns hung from the high ceiling that was iced with gilt trim carvings. So grand, for such a small travel agent’s.

Apart from the stacks of bright, glossy brochures the rest of the room was dark, muted colours with a weathered world map above the fireplace and an ancient-looking globe standing proudly in the corner. A melodic tune emanated from some hidden speakers; it sounded aboriginal and enchanting.

Trisha noticed me tilting my head to listen. ‘It’s from a remote Botswanian tribe I stumbled across when I visited the country many years ago. The bushmen from the Kalahari Desert performed at this tiny camp I was sleeping in for the night and their voices, rhythms and unusual dance moves were nothing like you would find down the local discotheque back home. I just fell into a trance and persuaded the tribesman to let me tape them on my Dictaphone. It’s not the best quality, but it takes me back.’

‘I’ve never heard anything like it,’ I admitted, as Trisha returned to making the tea, humming along.

Brochures on a walnut bookcase were meticulously separated into areas – exactly how I would have placed them, with European breaks at the top followed by Russia, China, Asia, Africa, the Americas, Australia and New Zealand and even Antarctic brochures. Trisha had the whole world covered here. My fingers reached out instantly to a South East Asia brochure. I lazily flicked through pages of colour from Indonesia, Malaysia and Thailand, each exotic image drawing me in.

‘You take milk and sugar, love?’ Trisha called out, making me pop the brochure back on the shelf nervously.

‘Just milk please.’

‘Ah, sweet enough are you?’ She smiled, repeating my dad’s favourite catchphrase.

‘Yeah, something like that,’ I grinned and padded over to the far wall that was covered in postcards from all over the world. Must be from happy clients, I thought, absently picking one that had dropped to the floor and turning it over. ‘Greetings from Uganda! You were right Trish, the tilapia is incredible here. Who knew I’d be choosing fish over greasy kebabs, how things have changed hey! Having an incredible time. It’s hard work getting around this beautiful country, especially in the heat, but it is so worthwhile. Hope all is good with you and you’re following the doctors’ orders? Love Stevie x’

‘Ah, most of those are from Stevie, he’s such an adventurer,’ Trisha said warmly. I quickly put the card back on the wall, flushed from reading her personal messages. Who was Stevie and why did Trisha need to be following doctors’ orders? I thought she seemed quite sprightly, albeit a little tired-looking.

A liver-spotted hand passed over a cup of tea, breaking my thoughts. Beckoning me to sit on the sofa with her, Trisha explained that she’d picked up the beautiful emerald green teacups in Iran eighteen years earlier. Sat close up Trisha didn’t look like your typical explorer; there were no stuffed animals hung on the walls, none of those round brown hats you imagine adventurers wearing or rifle guns proudly displayed. She looked like she would be more at home watching Bargain Hunt rather than bartering for crockery in an exotic eastern market.

‘Your shop’s beautiful, how long have you had this place?’ I waved my hand around the mysterious room, taking in the heavy aubergine velvet drapes hung majestically at the windows and a large sumptuous chandelier casting droplets of golden light from its vertical glass shards. It was a mix of safari meets Moroccan boudoir.

‘Ah, this is my baby,’ Trisha beamed as if seeing the room for the first time. ‘Never got round to having children of my own as me and my wonderful late husband Fred spent most of our time globetrotting. When we finally settled in Manchester I’d unfortunately missed that boat. His health wasn’t in the best condition back then so we used every penny we had to buy this place and focused our energies here.’

‘It’s a stunning space; you must actually enjoy coming to work here every day?’ A world away from my nondescript desk in the ugly grey office building I used to work at.

‘I truly love it and have been very blessed to have loyal clients help me, but I’m not getting any younger and the day will soon come when all this gets passed on to my godson, Stevie.’ She nodded towards the collection of postcards. ‘He’s about your age and just one of the few family members I have left.’ She rubbed her neck, wincing slightly. ‘He’s always sending me postcards from the countries he travels to, mostly on work trips. We have a lot of itchy feet in our family if you know what I mean!’

‘Athlete’s foot?’ I asked.

Trisha let out a long chuckle. ‘No dear, I mean that our feet itch to be on the move. To travel. That’s why sometimes I worry that when my time is up Stevie will struggle to cope with staying in one place indefinitely. Don’t get me wrong, he’s a good boy, but exactly like his mother was when she was his age, always looking for the next challenge and country to discover. I don’t think he’s lived in one town for longer than a year, keeps you on your toes our Stevie!’

God, this guy sounded like the polar opposite of Alex, who wouldn’t have moved to turn off the television if he’d lost the remote. Imagine leading such an exciting and fun life, always on the road, travelling all over the world. I could understand why the poor lad didn’t want to come rushing to Manchester to help his godmother’s business, it would be such a comedown.

‘I saw you earlier actually, running with a handful of brochures from those idiots up the road. I wanted to open my door and shout out for you to come in here as I was certain you wouldn’t find what you were looking for in that noisy, childish place. They should be ashamed, being so dismissive of anyone who isn’t 18 years old, doesn’t look like them or is only clutching pocketful’s of Daddy’s money on some sort of enriching gap year,’ Trisha said before breaking into a laugh. ‘Ha! The only thing those kids will be learning is how to get out of a Bali jail after being caught with marijuana on them. They think that traveling is just risking their lives, livers and futures for a jaunt around Asia with their eyes completely closed to the beauty and hospitality that receives them. But you – you remind me of me when I was your age.’

I spilled a little of my tea. ‘Oh, erm, really?’

‘Now, of course I don’t know you, but I don’t think you do either. That can be confusing, scary but also exhilarating.’ She had a point. ‘Over the years I’ve become pretty adept at understanding others; you need to, if you want to see the world. You also have to understand that everyone has a story and many of those stay hidden unless you really look for them.’ She sipped her tea. ‘So, have you just finished work for the day?’

‘I got fired.’ The words tasted bitter in my mouth.

‘Ah, I see. I’ve also noticed you’re not wearing a ring on an important finger and I look into your eyes and see a sadness, so I’m guessing there has been some recent mess-up in the love department?’ I fidgeted slightly, almost getting swallowed up on this cloud of a sofa. ‘You want to make changes in your life, but are scared of what these will mean, both to you and others around you.’

‘Yeah, something like that.’ She was right, of course. After I gave Trisha a much shortened story, as apparently I was sat with ‘Mystic Meg’, she rose and handed me the South East Asia brochure – the one I’d previously picked up myself.

‘It sounds like you’re new at this game, so I don’t want to fling you in some Outer Mongolian goat shed. Not just yet, anyway,’ she smiled, taken back to some distant memory. By the look on her face I thought maybe I did want to stay in some stinky goat shed.

‘I think Thailand would be perfect for you. They mostly speak English; it’s a country full of joy, charm and smiles. Just what you need to be around at the moment. It has beaches, jungles, metropolitan cities and the capital, Bangkok, is a place I’d advise anyone to go at least once in their life.’

‘That does sound pretty great.’ I thought back to my travel wish-list that I’d hastily unscrunched from my wastepaper bin, mentally checking things off: ride an elephant, laze on white sandy beaches, get some culture and visit temples. The images shining from the sleek pages were so tempting. Suddenly my mum’s shrill tones clanged in my head: Who would help me if I got sick? What if someone tried to drug me, or even worse, force me to become a drugs mule?

Trisha must have sensed my hesitation: ‘For the first-time traveller it can all feel a bit overwhelming, so why don’t we look at joining you onto a tour group? That way you’ll be with people in similar situations to yours; maybe first-timers or nervous about solo travel, but you also have the safety and ease of the trip being planned for you?’

I hadn’t even thought about that as an option. ‘Yeah, I reckon that could work,’ I smiled, giving Trisha the date I wanted to leave – basically as soon as possible – and she began tapping at a clunky keyboard.

‘Let me see… I think all my popular Thailand tours are booked up as it’s so last-minute. Looking at your dates of travel and discounting geriatric retirees, the only one I could book you on is this one.’ Her printer spluttered into life, acting as if it had always been so efficient. ‘It’s a family-owned business and will hopefully open your eyes to the world.’

The itinerary consisted of Bangkok, Chiang Mai, Kanchanaburi, and island-hopping, with organised visits to temples, street markets, cooking classes, language school and paradise beaches. ‘It sounds perfect,’ I breathed, noticing the uneasy look on Trisha’s face as she chewed her bottom lip. ‘What’s wrong with it?’

‘Nothing, nothing. The accommodation isn’t going to be 5-star luxury and at times it may feel far from home, especially after everything you’ve told me you’ve been through. My advice would be to keep your mind open and if it all gets too much then you must head to the Blue Butterfly Huts on this island here.’ She pointed to an ant-sized speck in the ocean off the larger Koh Phangan island called Koh Lanta. ‘They’ll look after you.’

An hour, nearly a full pack of biscuits and a few more cups of tea later, we had everything finalised; I was booked onto the six-week tour leaving in ten days! I didn’t want to worry about what I’d do once that was over and I was back here again. Stop trying to make plans for the future and just, for once, go with the flow. Trisha helped me apply for a fast-tracked Thai visa, sorted my travel insurance, booked me in for a few immunisations and gave me a list of all the things I needed to buy and pack. My cheeks were hurting from smiling; there was no going back now.

OM effing G! Georgia Green was going travelling.

CHAPTER 7

Eleutheromania (n.) An intense and irresistible desire for freedom

This evening was my leaving party, and also the first time I’d seen my mum since our slight disagreement over the phone last week when I’d come clean about my travel plans.

‘Georgia Louise Green.’ Oh God. She’d full-named me. ‘Why, when I called your work phone, did some rude woman tell me you’d been fired?’

I was transported back to being 11 years old, to when I’d accidently broken two of my mum’s china dogs that stood proudly on each end of the mantelpiece. I’d been dancing slightly too energetically to the Spice Girls album, trying to perfect Sporty Spice’s high kick, when my heel took out the left dog. In an effort to hide the evidence, I figured my mum would be less likely to notice if both were smashed and hidden in the bin. Genius logic. What I forgot was that my mum has the nose of a bloodhound sniffing out any change in her surroundings. I’d been grounded for a week and had to save a month’s worth of pocket money to replace them.

‘I haven’t been fired, no I, erm, quit,’ I replied, hoping she was sat down. OK so that was only a half-truth but I needed to rein in some control over this messy situation called my life.

‘What?!’ My mum’s shrill tones screamed down the line, forcing me to hold the phone away from my ear.

‘I need to have a change of scene and get out of Manchester for a while. You know I wasn’t happy in my job and it wasn’t going anywhere, so I quit.’ I felt like I was being interrogated over the china dogs all over again. Where did you put its right paw? What happened to its left ear?

‘I’d hoped this hoity-toity lady was wrong and this was all a misunderstanding.’ She paused, collecting her thoughts. ‘So what are you going to do? Please tell me you have another job lined up?’

‘I’m going to travel.’ I didn’t wait for her reaction as I continued, feeling braver with every word. ‘I’ve bought a plane ticket to Thailand. I’m going to go and see the world, Mum.’ There was silence on the other end of the phone, punctuated by a deep sigh.

‘Oh, Georgia. I thought you said all that was just a silly game you played with Marie, not that you were going to go and actually do it! I understand you’ve been through the wringer, but gallivanting off is not the answer. You can’t run away from the past. It will always find you.’

‘Mum, I’m not running from but running to. I’m changing my life. Surely you want me to be happy? And I really think by going out there to see the world, I will be,’ I said, full of confidence and a little bit of fear, having never been so forward with her before.

‘But…but how on earth will you survive? You’ve never done anything on your own!’

I flinched at that comment. It was one hundred percent true of course but it still stung that I hadn’t been more independent in my twenty-eight years. I’d never have been accepted into Destiny’s Child, I was a let-down as a Spice Girls fan. ‘I’ll be fine, Mum. People say you should treat strangers as friends you haven’t met yet.’ I tried to ignore the thought of the pulsating vein on the left side of her temple that would be throbbing at this conversation.

‘Yes, but they also say one in three murder victims know their killer,’ she blustered. ‘You know this world is a dangerous place and all me and your father have ever wanted was to keep you safe. We can’t do that from the other side of the world. I’ll not be able to sleep a wink every night you’re away – have you thought about that?’

‘Actually, Mum, I want to think about myself. Just me, for once in my life.’ There was silence on the line. Immediately I regretted biting her head off.

‘Well…well, OK then. I just hope for your sake you don’t end up regretting this silly holiday. Anyway, I need to go.’ With that she hung up, leaving me breathless, staring into the white noise in shock.

I hadn’t heard from her since then, but my dad had been sending me the odd secretive supportive text message. #DON’T WORRY ABOUT YOUR MUM. YOU GO FOR IT KIDDO. LOL. He clearly didn’t know what a hashtag was but the thought was there, in all its shouty glory.

‘You nervous about tomorrow then?’ Marie asked in the taxi as we made our way to the Chinese restaurant.

‘Yeah.’ I pulled a face. ‘A little! Although I think I’m more excited than terrified.’

‘I bet! Excited about all the hot men you’re going to meet?’ She winked and passed Cole his Sophie the giraffe toy he’d chucked on the floor.

‘Is that all you think about?’ I rolled my eyes. I don’t know what was with Marie but at the moment she was like a dog on heat, more obsessed with men than I’d ever seen her before.

‘Not all I think about.’ She stuck her tongue out which made Cole laugh. ‘But you must have imagined the tanned hunks, from all over the world, that will be backpacking too? You have to admit that there’s something sexy about a guy going off to explore the world, to face the unknown, unafraid of challenges and obstacles in his path,’ she sighed. ‘So manly and adventurous.’

‘Like Stevie,’ I said before clapping my hand to my mouth stopping myself. Where had that come from?!

‘Stevie?’ Marie turned to face me. ‘Who’s Stevie?’ Her eyes were glowing with excitement.

I shook my head quickly. ‘Forget I said it.’ I blushed.

‘Err, come on! Out with it, if you’re keeping some man gossip from me, Miss Green, I swear I’ll make you walk the rest of the way there.’

‘OK, OK! But listen, I’m sorry to disappoint you but there’s no gossip. I don’t even know anything about him.’ She looked confused.

‘OMG, wait, are you online dating! Swiping left on Tinder?’ she gushed excitedly getting her phone out of her handbag.

‘No!’ I shuddered at the thought. ‘Stevie’s the godson of Trisha, you know the lovely lady I booked my tour with?’ Marie nodded. ‘Anyway, in her shop I’d seen these postcards from, like, all over the world and I read one.’

Marie looked visibly deflated. ‘Postcards?’

‘Yeah, from all these cool places. Anyway, I read one by accident and he just sounded so lovely and like you said, adventurous, caring, kind, exciting.’ I pulled myself to a stop and cleared my throat. Marie was now staring quizzically at me with a sly smile on her bright fuchsia pink lips. ‘I just have this image in my head of the type of man this Stevie is. The type of guy that I guess in the future, I’d like to be with.’ I closed my eyes wincing, waiting for the moment that she burst into a fit of laughter, but she stayed silent. Squinting one eye open Marie was looking at me, but not with a what-a-ridiculous-stupid-idea type look but more an understanding yeah-I-get-it type look. ‘It’s crazy isn’t it?’

Marie shook her head, her recently tonged vibrant red curls dancing about. ‘No, not crazy. Inspiring. It’s good that you’re thinking about the future, about guys again – ’

‘Loooooooonnnnnng into the future,’ I interrupted her.

‘Yeah, OK, long into the future. But still, this is a positive sign, hun.’ I smiled, realising this was one of many reasons she was my best friend. Having a crush – was that what this was? –on a guy I’d never met, wasn’t that strange to her. ‘And you never know, maybe you’ll bump into this Stevie when you’re away, get married on some exotic beach, have a ton of kids and live happily ever after.’

I scoffed. ‘Yeah and maybe one day you’ll realise that Mike is the one for you.’

She busied herself with Cole’s car seat straps, ignore my teasing. ‘Mmm. Right. Here we are.’ Saved by the bell or what.

‘Err, you don’t get out of it that easy, Marie. One day you’re going to realise that I’m right and I don’t want you to be heartbroken if that day’s too late for Mike to still be waiting for you,’ I said. Maybe a bit harsh but true.

‘Georgia. I’m fine.’ She patted her hand on mine. ‘Like I’ve told you a million times before, me and Mike just won’t work. We had Cole, had some fun but that’s it. I’m having way too much fun being single for all that anyway.’ She wafted her hand away. ‘You’ll see!’ She took a note out of her purse to pay the driver. I knew her well enough to know when she was telling the truth but kidding herself at the same time. Maybe that was what all this sudden infatuation with other men was about, she didn’t want to admit her true feelings for the father of her child. ‘Now come on, we’ve got a leaving party to enjoy!’

Since arriving at the almost empty restaurant neither myself nor my parents had mentioned the argument, an unspoken ceasefire had been called for my last night with them all. Marie had surprised me with a pair of sunglasses, a cheap wind-up torch and a hand-drawn card from Cole that my parents cooed over. Mum and Dad gave me an envelope stuffed with Thai baht and a rape alarm which, when they had tested it prior to arriving here, had almost given my mum a heart attack. I guessed that this was their olive branch.