Scandalous: Scandalized!

“I already ruined things, honey. And you deserve much more than an apology.”

That was the second time he’d called her “honey” and she loved it. There had never been a relationship in her life since her parents’ death that warranted an endearment. She hadn’t realized that she’d even been missing it. But hearing Tony say it now, hearing the gentleness in his tone, the affection, she decided she liked it very much.

Since he seemed determined to talk about it, Olivia asked, “Why exactly are you apologizing?”

“Because I lost my head. I gave you nothing.”

“Not true.” Oh how she loved feeling his hard, lean body pressed against hers, the contrast of his firm muscles and his hair-roughened legs and his warmth. She tightened her arms and rubbed her nose against his chest, loving his morning musky scent. He always smelled so good, so sexy. So like himself. It made her dizzy and weak to breathe his delicious scent. “I’ve never made anyone lose their head before, Tony. I think it’s a rather nice feeling.”

He gave a strangled laugh, then tangled his hands in her hair to make her look at him. “I’ll take the blame, especially given the fact I’ve never made love to a woman without a condom before. Feeling you, Olivia, all of you, was a heady experience.”

She felt stunned by his admission. “Never?”

“Nope. I’ve always been the cautious sort, even when I was just a kid. But you’re to blame just a bit, too, showing up here in that getup.” He ran one large palm down her side, rubbing the material that was now bunched at her waist. His voice dropped to a low rumble when he whispered, “I almost died when you opened your coat, and I knew I wouldn’t be able to draw another breath without getting inside you first.”

And he thought he hadn’t given her anything? With her heart racing and her throat tight with emotion, she kissed him again, getting quickly used to the feel of his mouth on hers. When he lifted his head this time, she was very aware of his renewed erection and the way his arms were taut with muscles as he restrained himself, holding his chest away from her.

Tony watched her so closely, it was hard to speak, but she forced the words out, for some strange reason, wanting to tell him her thoughts. “I was half afraid you’d laugh, that I’d look ridiculous. Though I love wearing sexy things, no one sees me as a sexy woman.”

“You’re sexier than any woman has a right to be.”

“Tony…” The things he said made her light-headed.

“It’ll be our little secret, okay?” He began tracing the small red marks left behind from his morning whiskers. That long finger moved over her throat, her breasts. He stopped at her nipples and lightly pinched, holding her between his finger and thumb. He watched her face as he tugged gently, plucking, rolling her flesh until she groaned. Olivia wanted nothing more than to make love with him again.

But Tony was suddenly lifting himself away. “I have to shower and shave,” he said in deep, husky tones. “Despite what you say, I don’t like leaving burns on your skin.”

“No.” She tried to protest, to hold him near, but he only stood up then lifted her again. The way he cradled her close to his heart was something else she could get used to.

“You can shower with me, Miss Anderson, then I’ll see about attending you the right way.”

“I loved the way you did things.”

“You didn’t come.”

A flash of heat washed over her mostly naked body. He had such a blatant way of discussing things that excited her despite her embarrassment. “I…I enjoyed myself.” She sounded defensive and added, “But I’m supposed to stay still for a while.”

“I can promise you’ll enjoy yourself more when I do things properly.”

He seemed determined to fulfill her demands, when she now felt horrible for having made them. She didn’t want this to be only about base satisfaction, a series of touches meant to excite, with no emotion involved. It was the emotion that she’d been craving for so long, that felt so good now. But there was no way she could say that to Tony, not after she’d told him she wanted to be privy to his excellent technique.

An idea came to mind, and as he stood her inside the shower stall, she said, “Aren’t we supposed to wait two hours before doing this again? To give you time to…to replenish yourself?”

Tony stepped in behind her and began working the teddy up over her shoulders. When he finally tossed it outside the shower and stood looking at her completely bare, Olivia knew he’d have his way. He took a long time scrutinizing her, and that gave her a chance to look her fill also. He was such a gorgeous man, so solid, his body dark, his muscles tight.

She wondered if he enjoyed the sight of her near as much as she did him, but then he met her gaze and there was such heat in his green eyes, and more emotion than she could ever wish for, she forgot her own questions.

Tony inched closer to her until their bodies were touching from the waist down. His hard erection pressed into her belly, stealing her breath. His hands came up to cup her breasts. “You don’t have to watch the clock, honey. I promise you, it’ll take me at least that long to get my fill of looking at you and touching you.”

Her heart thumped heavily and she could barely talk. “Tony?”

“It’s called foreplay, Olivia. I intend to make up for the orgasm you missed—and then some. We’ve got all the time in the world.”

Thirty minutes later, their still damp bodies tangled in the covers on his bed, Olivia knew she’d never survive two hours worth of this. Tony was gently lathing one nipple while his fingers were busy drifting over her hip and belly, pausing every so often for an excruciating moment between her thighs to torment and tease her until she groaned and begged. He used her own wetness as a lubricant, sometimes pressing his fingers deep, stretching her, other times circling her opening, sliding over ultrasensitive flesh.

He laughed at her soft demands, his fingers gently plucking, rolling. “Easy, sweetheart. I promise, you’ll appreciate being patient.”

“No. No more, Tony. I can’t stand it.” There was a touch of tears in her voice, but she was too new to this, too unskilled to rationalize an ending that she’d never before experienced. Tony kissed her softly on her parted lips, then whispered, “Trust me now, okay?”

When she felt Tony’s cheek, now smooth from his shave, glide over her abdomen, the only thought she had was of finding relief. Every nerve ending in her body felt taut, tingling. There was no room for modesty, for shyness.

His hands curved around her knees and she willingly allowed him to part her thighs wide, leaving her totally exposed to his gaze. She felt his warm, gentle breath, the damp touch of his tongue. And then his mouth closed around her, hot and wet, and his teeth carefully nibbled.

No, she’d never survive this. She arched upward, again begging, feeling the sensations so keenly she screamed. He tightened his hold on her buttocks, holding her steady, forcing her to submit to his torment.

And then it happened and she was only aware of unbelievable pleasure. Tony encouraged her, controlled her, and when the sensations finally began to ebb, he eased, soothing her until she calmed.

When she opened her eyes—a move requiring considerable effort—Tony was beside her again, his hand idly cupping her breast and a look of profound interest on his face. She blinked at him, not understanding that look, and he said without a single qualm, “You’ve never had an orgasm before, have you?”

Her only recourse seemed to be to close her eyes again. But Tony laughed and kissed her nose. “Don’t hide from me, Olivia. Talk to me.”

“We’re not supposed to be talking.”

“No? Well, don’t worry. We’ll get on to making love again soon. But answer me first.”

Disgruntled by his personal question and his persistence, she said, “It never seemed particularly important before. Besides, I told you my two attempts at this failed.”

“Your two attempts with a partner.” His voice gentled. “That doesn’t mean you couldn’t have—”

Her eyes rounded when she realized where this questioning was going, and it seemed imperative to divert his attention. “Aren’t you supposed to be…uh, excited right about now?”

His smile proved she hadn’t fooled him one bit. But to answer her question, he lifted her limp hand, kissed the palm, then carried it to his erection, curling her fingers around him. For one brief instant, he held himself still, his eyes closing as her fingers flexed. Then he gave a wry grin. “I’m plenty excited. But I’m also enjoying you most thoroughly.”

“You’re embarrassing me, is what you’re doing.” She said it with a severe frown, but he only chuckled.

“Why? Because I’m feeling like the most accomplished lover around? You screamed, Olivia.” He cupped her cheek and turned her face toward him. “Look at me, honey.”

There was that endearment again. She opened her eyes and stared at him. The tenderness in his gaze nearly undid her.

“I’m glad I could give you something you’d never had before. It makes this all seem very…special.”

“Tony.” She rolled toward him, wanting him again, right now, unwilling to wait another instant.

And then the doorbell rang, and she knew she might not have any choice.

Tony seemed inclined to ignore it at first, but the insistent pounding that came next had him cursing and rising from the bed. As he pulled on jeans, he surveyed her sprawled form, then cursed again. “Don’t move. I’ll be right back.”

Olivia waited until he’d stomped out of the room before scrambling off the bed and wrapping the sheet around herself. She went to the door and opened it to peek, then crept down the hall enough to see who had come calling so early. Tony’s brother, John, stood in the entryway, the baby in his arms, and a very worried expression on his face.

Though they spoke in hushed tones, Olivia was able to hear every word.

“I know this is the worst possible time, Tony…”

“You have no idea.”

“Yes I do. I saw the car. I assume Olivia is here?”

Tony crossed his arms over his bare chest and said, “What do you want, John?”

“I’m sorry, I really am. And I swear I wouldn’t be here if there was anyone else. But Mom and Kate went on a shopping spree this morning and won’t be back for hours, and I have to take Lisa to the hospital. You know she wasn’t feeling great yesterday is why we left early. And she’s always so busy with the three kids, she stays exhausted. But she started running a high fever early last night, coughing and having a hard time breathing, and she’s gotten sicker by the hour. I’ve never seen her like this.” There was an edge of desperation in John’s tone when he added, “I can’t watch my three hellions in a hospital and be with her, too.”

Tony immediately straightened, then took the baby from his arms. “Is Lisa going to be okay?”

John looked almost sick himself. “I don’t know what’s wrong with her, hopefully just the flu, but…”

“Don’t give it another thought. Of course I’ll take the kids. Where are the other two?”

“Waiting in the car with their mother. I didn’t want to leave Lisa alone, and I wasn’t certain if you were home.” He leaned out the door and waved his hand to get the kids to come in. “I really appreciate this, Tony. I know you probably wish we’d all go…”

“Don’t be stupid, John. Just take care of Lisa and keep me informed, okay?”

As John stepped out to gather up a packed diaper bag and some essentials for the other kids, Tony rushed around the corner into the hallway and almost ran into Olivia. He had the overnight bag she’d brought in his left hand while he held the baby in the crook of his right arm. He didn’t question her snooping, only led the way into the bedroom. “You heard?”

Olivia could sense the worry in his tone and expression, and was reminded once again how close he was to his family. “Yes. What can I do to help?”

He shook his head. “I’m sorry, babe. Here, can you get dressed real quick?” He no sooner handed her the bag than he was rushing to the living room again to relieve John of the children and send him on his way. Olivia closed the door and sighed. It seemed Tony was going to throw her out, which made sense considering he didn’t want her around his family. But it still hurt. While they’d been making love, she’d entirely forgotten everything else in the world, including their twice-damned deal and all the reasons she couldn’t feel what she was presently feeling.

Despite all her reasons for needing to stay detached from him, she wanted to stay and help; she wanted to stay, period. Very much.

Her body was still tingling, her heart still racing from Tony’s sensual torment, but she managed to get her slacks and sweater on before he reopened the door. The baby was still nestled in his bare muscled arm, but that didn’t stop him from coming toward her, then pulling her close with his free arm. “Damn, I can’t believe my luck.”

“Things do seem to be conspiring against us.”

He brushed a kiss over her lips, then surprised her by asking, “Can you stay?”

Olivia blinked, not certain what to say.

“I know our plans have changed, hell, we might even have the kids all night. But…I don’t feel right about all this. It worries me, Lisa coming down sick like that.”

Olivia cupped his cheek, touched by his concern, and warmed by the way he’d included her. “You don’t want to be alone?”

His jaw tightened and his eyes searched her face. He seemed reluctant to admit it even to himself, but then he nodded. “I guess that’s about it.”

“We’re friends, Tony. Despite any other agreements, I’d like to believe that. And friends help friends. You don’t have to worry that I’ll read more into this than exists.”

He stubbornly ignored her references to their situation, and asked, “Does that mean you’ll stay, Olivia? Please?”

At that moment, she would have done anything for him, but of course, she couldn’t tell him that. She looked up at him and smiled. “Yes, I’ll stay. For as long as you need me.”

CHAPTER FIVE

A LOOK OF RELIEF washed over Tony’s features, then he hugged her close again. “I believe the coffee is still in the pot. It might be a little strong now, but I could sure use a cup. And the kids are probably hungry. Kids are always hungry, right? So what do you say? You up to breakfast?”

At just that moment, two faces peeked around the door frame, and they were both very solemn. Olivia’s heart swelled with emotion for these two small people who were obviously concerned about their mother. She forgot Tony for the moment, forgot that she didn’t know anything about kids, and went down on her knees to meet the children at their level.

“Hello. Remember me?”

Six-year-old Luke stared at her with serious eyes, all the energy of yesterday conspicuously missing. “Sure we remember. It was just last night. You was kissing Uncle Tony in his garage.”

Olivia felt her face turn pink, but she smiled. “Actually it was the other way around. Your uncle was kissing me.”

Maggie, who at three seemed very small and delicate, popped her thumb from her mouth to say with great wisdom, “Uncle Tony likes kissin’. He kisses me lots, too.”

And just that easily, Olivia found a rapport. She reached out and tugged Maggie closer, and the little girl came willingly, wrapping one arm around Olivia’s neck while holding tight to a tattered blanket with the other. Olivia perched the little girl on her knee. “Are you two hungry? I think your uncle was planning on making breakfast for us.”

Maggie nodded, but Luke turned away. Tony stopped him with only a word. “Your mom will be fine, Luke, I promise.”

“Dad looked awful scared.”

Tony caught Olivia’s arm and helped her to stand, then began steering them all toward the kitchen. “Not scared. Upset. There’s a big difference. Your dad can’t stand to see any of you sick or feeling bad. The fact that your mom is sick makes him feel almost as bad as she does. He wants to take care of all of you, just as your mom does. But he needs time alone with her now, so he can make certain the doctors don’t flirt with her too much. He can’t watch her if he’s busy watching you two.”

Luke didn’t look as if he understood Tony’s humor. “Mom is awful pretty.”

“Yes, she is. And so you guys get to stay here with me.”

“For how long?”

Tony stopped to stare at Luke, pretending a great affront. “Good grief, boy, you’ll have Olivia thinking you don’t like me.”

Maggie twisted loose from Olivia’s hold to say in a very firm voice, “We do so like Unca’ Tony. We like him lots.” And Olivia couldn’t help but smile.

The chatter continued all the while Tony cooked, and with each second, Olivia became more enamored of Tony’s familial commitments. The kids, despite their concern, were happy and comfortable to be with him. There was so much love in the air, she could fill her lungs with it. And Tony proved to be as adept at holding a child while cooking as any mother. Olivia wondered if he did so because he enjoyed holding the baby so much, or because he didn’t want Olivia to hold him.

Unfortunately, as the day wore on, the latter proved to be true. Not once, even at the most hectic times, did Tony request her assistance with the baby. Not long after they’d finished breakfast John called to say Lisa had pneumonia and they’d be keeping her overnight. She was worn down from all the daily running she did, not to mention having given birth not that long before. And since she was staying at the hospital, John wanted to leave the kids with Tony so he could be free to stay with her.

Tony agreed, and surprisingly, once the kids were assured their mother would be fine and probably home the next day, they seemed thrilled by the idea of staying. Tony promised to bring in a tent that they could set up in front of the fireplace. Maggie asked, “Will Livvy get to sleep with us, too?”

It seemed Tony was caught speechless for a moment, then he said, “If she wants to. And it’s Olivia, sweetheart, not Livvy.”

“I don’t mind, Tony. Actually it’s a familiar nickname.”

“You look kinda funny, Olivia.” Luke watched her closely, and Olivia was amazed by the child’s perception.

“I’m fine, Luke, honest.” But hearing little Maggie call her by the same name her own mother and father had always used dredged up long forgotten feelings and left her shaken. And Tony seemed to notice. He held her hand and gave it a squeeze, then went to call his mother and sister to let them know what was going on. He hadn’t wanted to tell them Lisa was sick until he knew for certain she’d be all right. Olivia gathered by the one-sided conversation that his mother offered to come and take the children, but Tony only thanked her. He said they had already made plans, and she could have them in the morning, but not before their “campout.”

Finally, right after an early dinner, Luke and Maggie got bundled up from head to toe and went out back to play. Being children, they seemed impervious to the cold, but Tony insisted that it could only be for a short spell.

Even though the yard was isolated, with no other neighbors in sight, Tony still admonished both children to stay very close by. They could use the tire swing in the tree or play in the small playhouse he and John had built the preceding summer for just such visits. The infant, Shawn, lay sleeping on a blanket on the floor and Tony and Olivia were left relatively alone.

Tony dropped down beside her on the couch, then grinned. “Man, am I worn-out. Kids, in the plural, can really keep you hopping, can’t they?”

She knew he had loved every single minute, that he wasn’t really complaining. It had been there on his face, the way he smiled, the way he held the baby and teased Maggie and spoke to Luke.

She licked her lips nervously and slanted him a cautious look. “I would have been glad to help you out a little, you know.” She said it tentatively, hoping to broach the topic without setting off any alarm bells.

But all he did was pat her thigh in a now familiar way. “You help a lot just by being here. Pneumonia. Can you imagine that? Lisa always seems so healthy. But John said the doctor told him it could bring you low in just a few hours.”

“Will she have to stay in the hospital long?”

“No. She’ll probably get to come home tomorrow. And Mom and Kate are already making plans to take turns helping her out until she’s completely well again. John is swearing he’s going to hire someone to come and clean for her from now on, but he said Lisa told him to forget it. She’s funny about her house, likes to do things a certain way, you know?”

His statement didn’t really require an answer, and Olivia couldn’t have given him one anyway. “Your whole family really sticks together, don’t they?”

He seemed surprised by her question. “Of course we do.”

“I mean, even though Lisa isn’t really part of your family…”

“She’s married to John. She’s the mother of my niece and nephews. She’s part of the family.”

And that was that, Olivia supposed. It would be so nice to belong to such a family. She said without thinking, “When Maggie called me Livvy…It, well, it reminded me of when I was a child. That was what my mother and father always called me. But I’d forgotten until she said it.”

Tony wrapped one large hand around the back of her neck and tugged her closer. His lips touched her temple, and she could feel their movement against her skin as he spoke. “I figured it must have been something like that. I’m sorry, Olivia. You looked so damn sad.”

“No. Not sad really.” She tried her best to look cavalier over the subject, even so far as giving him a smile. “It’s been so long, I’ve forgotten what it’s like to miss them. I guess I’m used to being alone.”

It was a horrible lie, because who could actually get accustomed to spending her life alone? There was never anyone to share the triumphs, which made them seem almost hollow, and when the struggles to get ahead occasionally became too much, she had only herself to lean on.

Tony was staring at her in his intent, probing way and Olivia had the horrible suspicion he was reading her thoughts, knowing exactly what it was she concealed, and how empty she often felt.

He looked down at her hands, which were tightly pressed together in her lap, then covered them with one of his own. “Is that why you’ve isolated yourself?”

“I haven’t.”

His gaze snapped back to her face, as if struck that she would deny such an obvious thing. “Of course you have. You keep to yourself, don’t date, don’t form long-standing friendships. You put everything you have into the lingerie shops. It’s almost like you’re afraid of getting involved.”

“I am not afraid.” She didn’t know what else she could say. She felt defensive, as if she had to explain her choice of lifestyle, but that was impossible. She would never be able to give Tony the truth.

“It’s not natural for a woman like you to still be single, to not want some kind of commitment.”

Despite herself, she stiffened. “A woman like me? What exactly is that supposed to mean?”

Tony closed his eyes and made a sound of frustration. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that the way it sounded. It’s just that…I never thought of you as you are. You always seemed pleasant enough, but so businesslike and…well, detached. And here you are, a very warm, caring woman, wearing sexy lingerie that makes me go a little crazy and looking so damn sweet and vulnerable at the most surprising times.”

“Tony…” She didn’t like being labeled vulnerable any more than she liked feeling defensive.

“I don’t understand you, Olivia, and I want to. I really do.”

“But why?”

He quirked a smile. “Don’t sound so panicked. I promise, I’m not asking for orange blossoms and golden rings. I just…I guess I like you more than I thought I would.”

“Sex has a way of making a man feel like that. Believe me, it will pass.”

He reached out to wrap a lock of her hair around his finger, then gently pulled until her face was closer to his. His tone was low, his expression heated. “Honey, you don’t know enough about men and sex to make that assumption.” He laid his palm warmly on her thigh, gently squeezing. “And I’d say that nasty little comment deserves some form of retribution, wouldn’t you?”