Not-So-Perfect Princess: Not-So-Perfect Princess

“I’ve been told he changed after she died. He loved my mother very much.”

“He loves you, too.”

Hearing the words from someone outside her family made Jules feel as if all the sacrifices she’d made to live up to the expectations of her father, family and country had been worth it. Her tongue felt thick, heavy, so she nodded.

“A lesser man might not have recovered from such a tragedy,” Enrique continued.

She appreciated the admiration in his words. “My father is a king. He is a strong man. He mourned my mother’s death, but he remarried less than a year later. He needed a male heir. I was a young child who needed a mother.”

“Understandable.”

Jules wondered if that meant Enrique would do the same should she die. Probably. “La Isla de la Aurora seems more progressive than Aliestle.”

“It is, though we are a little old-fashioned about a few things,” Enrique said. “Do not worry. I intend to make sure you like it here, Julianna.

His words fed her growing hopes. She gathered her courage. “My father said you would decide whether I could sail on the ocean after we are married. You told Alejandro we couldn’t sail right now. Does that mean you’ve given some thought to my sailing after our wedding?”

“Your father also discussed this with me. I’ve already made my decision.”

Her heart raced. She held her breath.

Please, oh, please. Say yes.

Enrique squeezed her hand again. “Sailing on the sea is too dangerous.”

Jules felt as if someone had wrapped a line around her heart and pulled hard. She had to make him understand, to see how important this was to her. “I am a careful sailor. I would never take undue risks.”

“You are on the ocean. Weather can change. No one, not even the best sailors in the world, can remove all the risk.”

She understood that. She wasn’t a complete idiot.

Desperate to make this work she sought another test. “Sailing is a pleasurable leisure activity. Something we could do together in our free time.”

“I don’t have a lot of free time.”

“It wouldn’t have to be that often. Only once in a while.”

“We may have just met, but I must admit I understand your father’s concerns.” Enrique spoke to her as if she were a child. “You are to be the mother of my children, my wife, my queen. I wouldn’t want anything to happen to you as it did your mother.”

Disappointment settled in the center of Jules’s chest, but she didn’t allow her shoulders to slump. Being here was still better than Aliestle. “So I’m only allowed to sail on lakes and rivers?”

“I’ve seen what sailing has done to my brother. The sport killed your mother. Once we are married, I do not want you to sail again.”

The air rushed from Jules lungs. Tears stung her eyes. She clutched the railing. “But I’ve always been able to sail. Just not on the ocean.”

“That was your father’s decision. This is mine.”

No! Her chest tightened. This was so much worse than she imagined. It wasn’t only the sailing. The tone of Enrique’s voice told her she would be exchanging her controlling father for a controlling husband. Her freedom would be curtailed here, too.

“Don’t look so disappointed,” Enrique chided. “This isn’t personal. I’m not trying to be cruel.”

“What are you trying to do then?”

“Be honest and help you,” he said. “It’s time for you to grow up and put childish things aside, Julianna. You may believe sailing is good for you, but it’s been brought to my attention that sailing brings out a wilder side in you.”

She drew back. “What have I done?”

“Kissed Prince Niko.”

“One kiss. We were engaged at the time.”

“There have been other reports,” Enrique said calmly, as if they were discussing business and not her life. “Such a pursuit is inappropriate for a future queen. You must embrace the bigger duty you’ll now have.”

Jules forced herself to breathe. Carving a new life for herself and helping Aliestle would be an uphill battle. She would be constrained here on the island, too. “What is to be my role here? My bigger duty?”

“You are to be my wife. You will provide me with heirs.”

Both of those things she’d known about. Accepted. But she doubted that was all Enrique would want from her. “And?”

“You will be a conventional princess and queen the people can respect. It’s in your best interest to do what I say and not bring any embarrassment to our name.”

Her best interest? What about their best interest? Enrique seemed to want to tell her what to do, not have a real relationship with her. How could love grow out of that?

Emotion clogged her throat.

What was she going to do?

Returning to Aliestle in disgrace and marrying a nobleman would be the worst choice for her, Brandt, her country and her future children. Doing something more drastic didn’t appeal to her, either.

Other women might run away. But if she turned her back on her responsibilities she would be exiled. Her father would keep her brothers from seeing her. Not only that, her father would also denounce her. Conditions would worsen for the women in her country. She couldn’t give up on everything she’d sacrificed her whole life for and her family.

That left one choice—going through with the wedding. Her stomach churned.

Think of the bigger picture, the future, others.

Jules would be able to help Brandt and Aliestle. Her children would have a better life and more choices on the island. Those things would make up for everything she was giving up. In time, Jules would see she made the right decision.

But right now, it still … hurt.

In an apartment on the ground floor, Alejandro tried to relax. But being back at the palace made him antsy. So did something else. Someone else …

Julianna.

Maybe she wasn’t as bad as he originally thought. She seemed different tonight, warmer and more genuine. But if that were the case, he couldn’t understand her icy facade earlier.

Not that he should be thinking about his brother’s fiancée at all.

Alejandro sat on the floor and used a laser pointer to play with the kitten. This was the same room he’d had as a teenager, though the furniture had been replaced, the floors refinished and the walls painted. The decor wasn’t the only change. Back when he’d been a teenager, a guard had always been stationed outside the back door that led to the beach path to keep him from running away. Not that a guard had been able to stop him. At least his father hadn’t posted anyone there tonight.

The kitten sprinted across the hardwood floor after the red dot, pawing and pouncing until he plopped onto a hand-woven rug and purred. His eyes closed.

As Alejandro moved from the floor to a chair, a flash of blue passed outside the window. The same blue as Julianna’s gown.

He stood to get a better look.

Silky fabric and blond hair billowed behind her as she hurried down the path leading to the beach, making her look almost ethereal with the starry night sky as her backdrop.

Not his type, Alejandro reminded himself.

He glanced at the clock. Eleven o’clock. A little late to go beachcombing. Not that what she did was any of his business.

But no one seemed to be with her. Not Enrique. Not her bodyguard.

That didn’t sit well with Alejandro.

She shouldn’t be alone. It was dark. She could lose her way.

On a lighted path, an inner voice mocked.

Something could happen to her. Alejandro ignored the fact that he could find his brother and send him after Julianna.

Alejandro stepped outside onto the patio. The tile was hard beneath his bare feet. Planters full of fragrant flowers lined the edge. Lanterns hung from tall wrought-iron poles.

Maybe Julianna wanted a closer look at the water, or to dance on the beach under the moonlight … or skinny-dip.

As his blood surged at the thought, he quickened his pace. Now that he would like to see. Ice princess or not.

The lighted path stopped at the beach. Alejandro’s bare feet sunk into the fine sand. Thanks to the moonlight, he saw Julianna standing at the water’s edge holding her high heels in one hand. The hem of her gown dragged on the sand. Wind ruffled her hair and the fabric of her dress. Waves crashed against the shore, the water drawing closer to her. She didn’t move.

Mesmerized by the sea or thinking? About him?

He scoffed at the stupid thought. She would be thinking about Enrique. Her fiancé. Alejandro should leave her alone.

Yet he remained rooted in place, content to watch her.

Being here had nothing to do with the way her dress clung to her curves or the slit that provided him with a glimpse of her long, smooth legs. He was here for her protection. Even though this strip of white sand was private, reachable only from the palace or by water. He didn’t see any boats offshore, only silver moonlight reflecting off the crescents of waves.

Still he stood captivated by the woman in front of him. The individual, not incarnations of women she would become. Future sister-in-law, mother of his nieces and nephews, queen.

He longed to go to her, pull her into an embrace, taste her sweet lips and feel her lush curves pressed against him.

What the hell was he thinking?

Disgusted with the fantasy playing in his mind, Alejandro turned to leave. Julianna moved in his peripheral vision. He looked back. She sat on the sand, resting her head in her hands. Her shoulders shook as if she were crying.

A sob smacked into him. His gut clenched.

The instinct to bolt was strong. Tears made him uncomfortable. He’d been in enough short-term relationships to know crying women were to be avoided at all costs. He never knew what to say and feared making a situation worse.

Yet he walked toward her anyway as if pulled by an invisible line. Compelled by something he couldn’t explain. “Julianna.”

She didn’t look up. “Go away, please.”

Her voice sounded raw, yet she was polite, always the proper princess. He saw her behavior wasn’t an act like his brother’s. His respect inched up for her. “I’m not going away.”

“I’ll pretend you aren’t here then.”

“It won’t be the first time that’s happened.” He plopped onto the sand next to her. “I’ve been becalmed many times. Having the boat bob like a cork while waiting for wind to return used to drive me crazy, but I’ve learned to enjoy the downtime.”

She remained silent.

As waves broke against the shore, Alejandro studied the stars in the sky. He drew pictures in the sand. A boat. A crab. A heart. He wiped them away with the side of his hand.

Julianna raised her head. “You’re still here.”

“Yes.” Tears streaked her cheeks. The sadness in her swollen eyes reignited his desire to take her in his arms and kiss her until she smiled. “I may have some of the same stubborn streak shared by other members of my family.”

She sniffled.

He wished he had a tissue for her. One of those handkerchiefs his brother and father carried in their pockets would come in handy. “When you’re ready to talk …”

A new round of tears streamed down her face. She looked devastated, as if someone she loved had died.

Her vulnerability clawed at his heart, made him feel useless, worthless. He couldn’t sit here and do nothing.

Alejandro turned toward Julianna and lifted her onto his lap.

She gasped. Stiffened.

A mistake, probably, but he’d deal with that later. He needed to help Julianna.

The moment he wrapped his arms around her something seemed to release inside her. She sagged against him, rested her head on his shoulder and cried. He rubbed her back with his hand, the same way his mother used to do whenever he’d been hurt by something Enrique did or his father had said.

Julianna’s tears didn’t stop, but that didn’t bother Alejandro. She felt so perfect nestled against him. Her sweet scent enveloped him. He would have preferred to be in this position under different circumstances, but he knew that wasn’t possible. She had a fiancé—what she needed tonight was a friend.

He could be a friend. That was all he could ever be to her.

Her tears slowed. Her breathing became less ragged.

“Thank you,” Julianna muttered. “I’m sorry for inconveniencing you. This is so unlike me.”

Alejandro brushed the strands of hair sticking to her tearstained cheeks. “You’re in my arms and on my lap. Formalities and apologies aren’t necessary.”

She stared up at him. Even with puffy, red eyes she was still beautiful.

But she was almost family. She would be his sister-in-law.

Julianna scooted off his lap. “I’m better now.”

He missed the warmth of her body, the feel of her curves against him. “Tell me what’s wrong.”

She looked at the water. “It’s nothing.”

“Let me be the judge of that.”

A beat passed. And another. “Did you hang around after Enrique joined me on the terrace?”

“No.” Maybe Alejandro should have.

She took a slow breath. “I thought coming here and marrying Enrique would be so much better than staying in Aliestle. I believed things would be … different.”

“I don’t understand.”

“It’s difficult to explain. Do you recall at dinner when you asked if we sailed, and Brandt answered?”

Alejandro nodded. He’d thought that odd.

“Brandt spoke because he knows how much sailing means to me, and I would’ve gotten carried away. I love it. I’d rather sail than do anything. Being on a boat is the only time I can be myself. Not a proper princess or a dutiful daughter and sister.” She gazed at the water. “It’s heaven on earth for me.”

The passion in her words heated the blood in his veins. The longing for independence, for a freedom from all the expectations of being a royal matched the desire in his heart. This perfect princess was as much a black sheep as him. She just kept the true color of her wool hidden. “I know exactly how you feel.”

She studied him. “I thought you might. My father has never allowed me to sail on the ocean due to my mother dying during a race. That’s why Enrique turned down your invitation to go sailing. My father said once I married, Enrique could decide whether I could sail or not.”

“You’ll be living on an island,” Alejandro said. “Why wouldn’t you sail?”

“That’s what I thought. After you left the terrace, I asked Enrique about being able to sail.” Her lower lip quivered. “He has forbidden me to sail. Not only on the ocean, but ever again. He says sailing brings out a wildness in me that’s not appropriate for a future queen. I’m to be a conventional wife and princess.”

Tears gleamed in her eyes.

Damn Enrique. His brother was a complete moron. A total ass. As usual. “He has spoken without thinking.”

“He was quite serious about his expectations of me.”

“My brother might be a cad, but he isn’t a monster. He’ll come around.”

Tears slipped from the corners of her eyes. “I don’t think he will.”

Alejandro’s chest tightened. “I’ll talk to Enrique. Make him see how much sailing means to you.”

“No,” she said. “He might change his mind about marrying me.”

Not likely given her dowry. But Julianna was so much more than the money she brought to the marriage. She might act like a cold, dutiful princess, but underneath the perfect facade was a passionate woman looking to break free of the obligations that came with her tiara and scepter. La Isla de la Aurora deserved a queen like Julianna. Too bad Enrique didn’t deserve a woman like her.

“Ask to be released from the marriage contract.” Alejandro couldn’t believe those words had come from his lips.

“I can’t.”

“You won’t.”

“If I don’t marry Enrique, I’ll be sent home to marry one of the sons of our Council of Elders.” The way her voice cracked hurt Alejandro’s heart. “In Aliestle, it’s against the law to disobey your husband. I’d rather raise my children in a country that is more progressive. At least in principle. This is my fate. I must learn to accept it.”

Alejandro hated seeing her so distressed. She deserved to be happy, to have the freedom to do what she wanted to do.

“Not so fast,” he said. “In spite of a few traditional mindsets here, La Isla de la Aurora is a progressive country. That includes our laws. Enrique can’t throw you in prison or lock you away in a tower if you disobey him and go sailing.”

“This isn’t only about my sailing.”

“I’m not only talking about sailing. My mother left the island fifteen years ago.” Alejandro had learned an important lesson the day his mother left. Never rely on anyone but yourself. “Separation is an option here, even for royals.”

“That’s very modern compared to where I come from.” She wiped her eyes. “You see, I’d hoped to use my position as future queen to effect change back home without embarrassing my country and family.”

Alejandro remembered what she’d told him. “Working within the system.”

She nodded. “Royals can’t be selfish and ignore the people who look up to them.”

“That’s noble of you,” Alejandro said. Too bad most royals didn’t feel that way. “But you shouldn’t be too upset. My brother’s pulling one of his power plays with you. He’s done it to me many times and will change his mind. Your life will be better here than in Aliestle. You’ll have royal obligations, but you’ll also be able to do what you want to do, including help your country and sail.”

Her shoulders remained slumped. “Enrique could annul the marriage if I defy him. I’d have to return to Aliestle.”

“I don’t see a ring on your finger.”

“Not yet anyway.” She glanced at her left hand. Straightened. “No ring.”

“What?” Alejandro asked.

Her gaze met his. “Maybe Enrique will change his mind about things or maybe he won’t. I can’t change anything that will happen once I marry. But if I go sailing now, I wouldn’t be disobeying my husband since Enrique is only my fiancé.”

Her tone sounded different. Not as distraught. “You lost me.”

Julianna’s gaze met Alejandro’s with an unspoken plea.

Understanding dawned. He leaned away from her. “No. No way. I can’t get involved in this.”

“You’re already involved.” She scooted closer. “All I need is a boat for one sail.”

The flowery scent of her shampoo filled his nostrils and made him waver. He leaned backed to put some distance between them. “If you’re caught disobeying your father …”

“I’ll make sure I’m not,” she said. “You believe Enrique will change his mind, but you didn’t see the look in his eyes. It’s worth the risk for one last hurrah before I get married.”

“Maybe to you, but not to me.” Alejandro would be in deep trouble. That had never bothered him in the past. But the stakes were higher this time.

“What do you have to lose?” she asked.

His chance at freedom. He hated the way Enrique was treating Julianna, but Alejandro didn’t want to cause an even bigger problem between the couple. He needed the two to marry and have children.

A deep shame rose up inside him. He was thinking of himself while Julianna was trying to do her duty even if it made her unhappy.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “But I won’t be the reason you get in trouble.”

Disappointment shone in her lovely eyes.

“Fine.” She flipped her hair behind her shoulder with a sexy move. “I’ll find a boat myself.”

She would, too. He pictured her heading to the marina and going out with anyone who’d take her. That could end in disaster. If he helped her …

Alejandro couldn’t believe he was contemplating taking her out, but he didn’t want to think only of himself. “Sailing is that important to you?”

“Yes.”

The hope and anticipation in the one word made it difficult for him to breath.

“Please, Alejandro.” Julianna stared up at him with her wide, blue eyes. “Will you please help me?”

A long list of reasons why he shouldn’t scrolled through his mind. But logic didn’t seem to apply in this situation. Or with Julianna.

He thought about it a minute. Taking her sailing wasn’t that big a deal. “I suppose it would be against my character and ruin my bad reputation if I turned down an opportunity to do something Enrique was against.”

She leaned toward him giving him another whiff of her enticing scent. “So is that a yes?”

CHAPTER FOUR

YES. I’ll take you sailing tomorrow night.

Jules fell asleep thinking about Alejandro’s words. She woke up with them on her mind, too.

Sunlight streamed through the windows. Particles in the air gave the rays definition, as if a fairy had waved her magic wand to make the sunshine touchable. She reached out, but felt only air.

With a laugh, she rolled over in the queen-size bed eager to start her day. She couldn’t wait to go sailing tonight. Of course if she was discovered …

Don’t think about that.

She needed to do this. Everything else in her life, from her education to her marriage, had been determined for her. Not out of love, but because of what tradition dictated and what others believed to be best for Aliestle.

Going sailing tonight was the one decision she could make for herself. She was desperate enough for this one act of disobedience. A secretive rebellion of sorts, the kind she never did as a teenager.

Jules tossed back the luxurious Egyptian cotton sheet and climbed out of bed. Her bare feet sunk into a hand-woven Persian rug. Only the finest furnishings for the grand palace.

She entered the large bathroom. Yvette had set out her toiletries on the marble countertop. The gold plated fixtures reminded Jules of every other castle she’d stayed in. Gold might be considered opulent, but didn’t any of the royal interior designers want to be creative and try a different finish? Then again, royalty could never be too creative or different. The status quo was completely acceptable.

Jules stared at her refection in the mirror. Today she would maintain that status quo. People would look at her and see a dutiful princess. Even if she would be counting down the hours until her first and last taste of …

Freedom.

Her chest tightened. She had no idea what true freedom would feel like.

So far, Jules’s choices in life had been relegated to what she wanted to eat, if it wasn’t a state dinner, what books she wanted to read, if she’d completed all her assigned readings, and what she purchased while shopping. Perhaps that was why she’d become a consummate shopper.

Choosing what she wanted to do without having to consider the expectations of an overprotective father and a conservative country would have to feel pretty good. She couldn’t wait to experience it tonight.

Jules had thought about what Alejandro said about the island not being Aliestle, about the legal rights she would have here and about his mother leaving his father. Those things had led her to devise a new plan.

She would sail tonight, then return to being a dutiful princess in the morning and marry Enrique after the Med Cup. Once they had children, she would work to improve her position, get Enrique to be more cooperative and try to change things.

Thirty minutes later, Yvette clasped a diamond and pearl necklace around Jules’s neck. “Excellent choice, Yvette. You have quite an eye when it comes to accessories.”

“Thank you, ma’am.” The young maid stared at their reflection in the mirror. “You look like a modern day Princess Grace.”

Jules felt a little like Princess Grace, who had been forced to stop acting because someone said the people of Monaco wouldn’t be happy if she returned to making movies. Life for many royals didn’t always have a happy ending.

“Thank you, Yvette.” The retro-style pink-and-white suit had been purchased on a recent trip to Paris. Jules tucked a strand of hair into her French roll. “I’m sure the hairstyle helps.”

“Prince Enrique will be impressed.”