Texas Rebels: Falcon

“Don’t ever let a boy pressure you into sex.”

“Did you pressure my mother?”

It was on the tip of his tongue to lie, but since his daughter was being so honest he had to do the same. “Yes.”

“Why do boys do that?”

“It’s hard to explain, baby, especially to my own daughter. Why don’t I make an appointment with the pediatrician and you can ask her these difficult questions. I’m sure she would be happy to go over this with you.”

“The pediatrician? Dad, seriously? I’m seventeen years old and I know about the birds and the bees. Remember we talked about it when I got my period and you took me to see the pediatrician then so she could explain intimate stuff that made you sweat?”

He remembered it vividly and he had been sweating bullets.

“I know about sex. My friends and I talk about it all the time. Kelley and Michelle are on birth control, but I’m not ready for that. Sex...well, it just makes me nervous.”

“You can talk to Rachel or Lacey. They’re in the family now.”

“I don’t need to talk to anyone. It’s about me and the way I feel.”

“Grandma is always here if you need her.”

“Dad, Grandma would really freak out.”

Falcon smiled. “Grandma’s a little old-fashioned, but I’m sure she would answer any questions you have.”

“Forget I said anything,” she mumbled.

“When it comes to boys, I want you to be very sure of what you want. I know most girls your age are sexually active, but you have to understand, as your dad, I’d rather you waited until you’ve found someone special.”

“I’ll probably die a virgin.”

He squeezed her. “I doubt that.”

She rested her head in the crook of his shoulder. “Daddy, I don’t want to go away to college. I want to stay here with you, Grandma, Grandpa, the uncs and Zane.”

At that little-girl’s voice, Falcon knew he’d failed as a parent. He’d protected and sheltered Eden, as his mother and brothers had. Now she was afraid to leave the nest.

“Is this what barrel racing is about?”

“I don’t know. Maybe.”

“Baby, just about every kid wants to go to college. It’s lots of fun, I’m told. Parties, staying up as late as you want, being an adult and making your own decisions.”

“Kelley is going and so is Michelle. They can hardly wait.”

Besides her conflicting thoughts about sex, something else was holding Eden back, keeping her from enjoying these years.

“What is it, baby? Why can’t you enjoy this with your friends?”

“Because...because when I go, you’ll be all alone.”

“What are you talking about? My brothers, Mom, Grandpa and Zane are here and enough work to keep me busy for the rest of my life.”

“But it’s always been just you and me and when I graduate, I won’t be here anymore in case you need me.”

“Eden, baby, that’s what life is about—changes. Nothing stays the same. I want you to grow up, be independent, but most of all I want you to be happy. And maybe every now and then you can come visit dear ol’ dad.”

Eden giggled and then became silent. “Do you remember that book you bought me when I was a kid about a genie granting wishes? I wanted to find a genie in a bottle so she could grant me my wish, and my wish was that my mother would come home.”

A lump clogged Falcon’s throat. He should tell her about Leah. Eden needed her mother now more than ever. But he had to be sure of Leah’s motives.

“Wouldn’t it be great if we could pick a time in our lives that we were happy and we could live in that moment forever? Do you know what time I’d pick?” She twisted her head to look at him.

“I have no idea.”

“It would be when I was little and Papa was alive. I know some people say I can’t remember because I was too small, but I do. I can remember the sound of his boots on the tiled floor when he came home and him shouting, ‘Eden. Where’s my Eden?’ I can remember the excitement in my chest when I heard his big voice. I’d shout, ‘I’m here, Papa,’ and run to meet him. He’d grab me and throw me in the air and hold me up until I could almost touch the ceiling. Then he’d sit me on his shoulder and I felt on top of the world. I was happy and Grandma smiled a lot then and all the uncs were in good moods. But then he died and everything changed. No one seemed to be happy anymore. I don’t like change.”

She rested her head on his shoulder again and they didn’t speak for a moment. It was uncanny how she remembered that. It happened just the way she’d said. His father had so many people who loved him. Why hadn’t he fought to live instead of giving in to the liquor? Sometimes that angered Falcon. And saddened him, too.

His dad had been the strongest man Falcon had ever known. But he also had his weaknesses and Falcon became very aware of them after the shooting. His dad would work all day on the ranch and then after supper he would retire to his room with a bottle of Scotch. He would drink until he passed out. That was the only way he could sleep.

When Eden was born, his routine changed and Falcon had hoped for better things. John Rebel would spend time with his granddaughter, but as soon as she’d go to sleep, he’d go to his room with a bottle. One morning his mom had found him on their deck with an empty bottle in his lap. He had died sometime during the night. It was a shock to everyone. John’s sons had thought he was invincible and could beat anything. But they’d been wrong. Admitting that had taken more courage than any of them thought they’d had. Life after their father hadn’t been easy.

“What time would you choose to live in, Daddy?”

“Eden, that’s silly.”

“No, it isn’t. I told you mine and now you have to tell me yours.”

He didn’t have to think about it. “I’d choose that time when your mom and I were teenagers and it was just the two of us. The world ceased to exist. We lived just for each other.”

“See, that’s what makes me nervous. You and my mom were so in love, but it wasn’t real. It only lasted for a little while. How do you know if it’s real? I don’t want to get hurt like that—like she hurt you.”

“Oh, baby girl.” He hugged her. “There are no guarantees in this world. You just have to go with your heart. I don’t regret one moment I spent with your mom. She gave me you.”

“Ah, Daddy, you’re gonna make me cry.”

“One day you’re going to meet a guy, and you’re going to feel a special connection like you’ve never felt before. I can’t explain exactly what it is, but you’ll know when it happens. He’ll be all you ever think about and when he touches you, you won’t be uncomfortable. It’ll be natural and everything will fall into place. Love is something you have to work on. Both parties have to work on it, not just one. A lot of things can go wrong. If the relationship falls apart, it’s the way it was meant to be. You can’t beat yourself up. You have to live in the moment. Remember that genie thing and all. Very few people get it right, Eden, but we all play the game because it’s worth it.”

She kissed his cheek. “I have the best dad in the world. Sometimes he’s grouchy but I still love him.”

“Love you, too, baby girl. Now you better go to bed. You have school tomorrow.”

She got up from his lap and stood there in tight jeans and bunny slippers. A woman, but the little girl was hanging on with all her might. Falcon would miss that little girl. But he was looking forward to getting to know the woman. She had values and principles and he hoped he had something to do with that. He knew in his heart that whatever she had to face down the road, she had the strength to do it. Even meeting her mother for the first time.

“You know what, Dad?” she said walking toward the stairs. “I’m going to barrel race, go to college and have sex.”

“There’s no rush on the last part. Take your time and make your dad happy.”

She laughed and ran up the stairs. Falcon stood with a weary sigh and clicked off the lamp. He had a big decision to make, but he knew he’d already made it. Eden deserved to know her mother. Or at least to meet her. He wouldn’t keep that from her.

Falcon headed toward his mother’s room. She hadn’t gotten up with the noise or the light and that bothered him. Her door was slightly ajar and he peeped in. She was curled up in the bed. Evidently, she’d heard them and gone back to bed, not wanting to interrupt.

On the way to his room, the responsibilities of life hit him. He had to make right decisions for everyone, but most of all for Eden.

In his room, he sat on the bed and took his cell out of the pocket of his robe. It was after twelve and Leah was probably asleep. He’d call tomorrow. But something in him couldn’t wait.

It was answered almost immediately. “Falcon.”

“Yes. We need to talk.”

“When?”

“Tomorrow.”

“Have you told Eden?”

“No, I want to be sure of your motives and I want answers. I want to know where you’ve been all these years and why you couldn’t pick up the phone to call your family. I want every damn detail, Leah. You’re not seeing your daughter until you give me those answers.”

“I’m not asking anything of you. I just want to see my daughter for a few minutes. You don’t have to grill me for that.”

“A few minutes? That’s all your daughter means to you? A few minutes?”

“Don’t make this difficult.”

He gritted his teeth. “You have a whole new life planned and your daughter doesn’t fit in. Is that it?”

“It’s too late, Falcon. Can’t you see that?”

“No. All I see is a selfish woman thinking only of herself.”

There was complete silence on the other end.

“Leah?”

“I don’t know what you want me to say. Eden is seventeen years old and I can’t just suddenly become a mother. I’m sure she doesn’t want that and I’m sure she hates me by now. Just let me have a few minutes and I’ll disappear out of your lives.”

“Oh, it’s easy for you to disappear. Why don’t you try staying for a while and facing your responsibilities?”

“When can I see her?” she asked instead of answering.

“Not until we talk. Where are you staying?”

“At a hotel in Temple.” She gave him the name and room number.

“I’ll be there at ten in the morning,” he said, and clicked off. She wanted to bend him to her will, but that wasn’t happening. He’d allow the few minutes she so desperately needed with her daughter. Not for Leah, though. For his daughter. Eden deserved at least that much. But he would never give Leah a divorce to marry someone else. That would be his ultimate revenge.

Chapter Four

A time for truth...

Falcon woke up at 5 a.m. and the morning seemed to drag. He had to call Eden three times before she got up. The late night had caught up with her. After all the craziness of the morning, one thought kept him focused: it was time to talk to Leah.

Rebel Ranch was getting ready for the fall roundup and he really needed to be home. His brothers gave him a funny look when he said he would catch them later. Of course, they had questions. Falcon was always on top of everything that happened at the ranch, but today he wasn’t in the mood to tell them about Leah. That would come later. His mother must’ve sensed his mood, because she didn’t ask questions. He was grateful for that.

At nine o’clock he was finally on his way to Temple. He called Leah to tell her he would be there early. She said she would order coffee and he started to tell her not to bother. But he might need something strong to get him through the morning.

The hotel was one of the nicer ones in Temple. He walked to the elevator and went up to the third floor. It didn’t take him long to find her room. He knocked and it opened almost immediately.

He paused at the sight of her in a slim-fitting black dress and a red belt circling her tiny waist. Her dark hair hung to her shoulders in a tousled style. On her feet were strappy high heels. This wasn’t the Leah he knew in jeans and sneakers. This woman was a stranger to him.

She held the door wider. “Come in.”

He followed her into what was obviously a suite with two rooms—a living area and a bedroom.

“Have a seat.” She motioned to the sofa.

The room was stylish with ornate furniture, and he’d guess it had cost a bundle to book. How could she afford this? Obviously her life had been good and for the first time, he realized that the young girl he had married had long been gone in more ways than one.

He sat down and placed his hat beside him. She stood a few feet away, looking as beautiful as he’d ever seen her. If he didn’t know her so well he would think she was as cool as a winter breeze, but he recognized the tension in her body and the nervousness in the way she kept glancing toward the door.

“Where have you been for over seventeen years?” He didn’t see any reason to postpone the inevitable. A knock at the door stalled her answer.

A waiter brought in a carafe of coffee and a teapot. That puzzled him, but not for long. She poured a cup of tea for herself.

“You drink tea now?”

“Chamomile. It helps me to relax.” She handed him a cup of coffee and then she stirred her tea.

He held the cup with both hands and forced himself to calm down so he wouldn’t break it into a million pieces. “Where have you been, Leah?”

Taking a seat in a wingback chair, she replied, “It’s a long story.”

“I’ve got time.”

She took a sip of tea and placed the cup back on the tray. “I...I don’t know where to start.”

“How about the day you left.”

“Okay.” She took a deep breath. “I was up all night with Eden. I couldn’t get her to stop crying and I was so frustrated and felt helpless as a mother. When you held her, or Kate, she would stop, so there had to be something wrong with me. I thought I was hurting her in some way.”

“That’s crazy.”

She glared at him. “Are you going to make snide comments or are you going to listen?”

“I’ll listen.”

“I never told you about my mother. It was difficult for me to tell anyone.”

“You said she died in an accident when you were twelve.”

“Yes. A terrible accident. See, my mom was bipolar and she would go into these violent rages that were hard to deal with.” Leah reached for her cup and took a swallow. “When she was in these rages, she always wanted to hurt someone, and I was always around so it was usually me. She broke my arm, my ribs, my collarbone and gave me more bruises than I can remember. I finally learned to hide from her and that was probably the only thing that saved my life. My dad just worked more and more. One day a guy cut her off on the highway and she followed him to a gas station ranting and raving. He pulled a handgun from the glove compartment and shot her. She died at the scene.”

Falcon was stunned and his heart ached for that little girl who grew up so afraid. He never knew she suffered like that. It was probably the reason she was so shy and quiet.

“Why couldn’t you tell me that?”

“I don’t know.” She placed the cup back on the tray. “I just wanted to forget it and start a new life in Horseshoe. You see, I didn’t want to remember I had that kind of mother. But when Eden wouldn’t stop crying I thought I was hurting my child like my mother had hurt me. That day when she cried and cried, I had this urge to put my hand over her mouth to stop the crying. As soon as the thought entered my head, I knew I had to get away. I just had to get out of the house for a couple of days to prove to myself that I wasn’t a terrible person.”

“Leah...”

“Eden finally went to sleep. I went downstairs and told your mother I was going out for a while and for her to listen for Eden. I got in my car and drove away.”

“Where did you go?”

Leah looked down at her clasped hands in her lap. “I was going to my cousin’s in Houston. I thought I could stay there until I got my head straight.”

“I called Nancy and she said she hadn’t heard from you, in case you’re planning to lie. I called her for six solid months and every time she said the same thing—she didn’t know where you were.”

“I never made it to her house.”

“What happened?” A sense of dread came over him. He had the same feeling the day he’d heard his dad screaming for their mother. Falcon had been feeding the horses when his dad had raced toward the barn with a bloody Jude and Phoenix in his arms. Whatever Leah had to say, he knew it was as bad as what had happened that day. Instinctively, he tensed as he prepared himself to listen to the rest of her story.

“I drove to Austin, to the bus station. I left my car about a block away. I’m not sure why I did that. It’s not clear in my head why I didn’t just drive to Nancy’s. But I think I was afraid you would come after me and make me go back when I wasn’t ready. I really needed some time.”

“The police called the next week and I picked up the car. There was no trace of you and the police concluded that you just wanted to get out of an unhappy marriage.”

“It wasn’t like that.”

“What was it like?”

“I loved you with all my heart, but I couldn’t deal with the baby and the crying and the fear that I was going to hurt her. Living with your family didn’t help, either. It was overwhelming.”

He swallowed, knowing part of her problem was his fault. “What happened next?”

“I took the bus to Houston fully intending to go to Nancy’s. The pay phone was broken at the bus station and the guy said there was one at the convenience store across the street. It was raining and I waited for it to let up before I ran down the street, but it started pouring again and I could hardly see. The light was yellow and cars were stopping so I darted across the intersection. One car didn’t stop and it hit me. I woke up a year later.”

“What?” The dread in his stomach became a burning ache and permeated his body. He felt as if he was on fire.

“Most of that time is a blur, but Miss Hattie...”

“Who’s Hattie?”

“Hattience Thornwall, but everyone calls her Hattie. She’s the lady who hit me. She was seventy-five years old and felt guilty over what had happened. Her car hit me and knocked me into the intersection, where another car ran over me. I had two broken legs, my chest was crushed and I had severe head injuries—the side of my face slid on the pavement, ripping away the skin and part of my ear, and one eye bulged out. Once in the ER they worked on my chest and my head, the most life-threatening injuries.”

Falcon stood up, needing to move as his emotions swamped him. “Why didn’t someone call me? I’m your next of kin.”

“Someone stole my purse at the scene and no one knew who I was. I had no identity. I was Jane Doe number seventy-two.”

“In this day and age there had to have been some way to identify you! What about your wedding ring? Our names were engraved on the inside.”

“I was told they cut it off my swollen hand and it must have gotten thrown away by mistake. The authorities ran my picture in the paper, but no one came forward. The picture was after the accident and Miss Hattie said I probably didn’t look like myself.”

“You talk of this woman with fondness and she caused you all this misery.”

“Yes, it’s a little confusing, but it was part my fault, too. Please listen to the whole story.”

He sat down again, unable to do anything else.

“They didn’t expect me to live, and the hospital had to get a court order to take me off the ventilator. Miss Hattie fought this, but she lost. They removed it and were shocked when I could breathe on my own. Since they didn’t know who I was and I had no insurance, they moved me to an indigent hospital. After many weeks, I was still unconscious, so they prepared to put me in a state institution. Once again Miss Hattie objected to this. She had me moved to a private facility and she paid the bills.”

“That was generous.”

“Yes, the nurses said she visited at least three times a week and always brought fresh flowers for my room. One year and two days later I opened my eyes and the first word I said was Eden. I had no idea who she was or where I was and I quickly drifted into a deep sleep again. I kept waking up, confused and disoriented. The nurses said I kept calling for Falcon and asked who he was. I had no idea, but I knew he was important to me.”

A catch in his throat kept him from responding.

“Little by little my memory started to come back, but my muscles had atrophied and I couldn’t even feed myself. I was totally helpless.”

“If you knew your name, why didn’t someone call me then?”

“My memory didn’t come back all at once. Bits and pieces came to me and it was five years before I could put all those pieces together. In the meantime they had to concentrate on my legs because they didn’t operate on them at the time of the accident. They were more concerned about my chest and my head and they didn’t think I would make it anyway. Nor did they think I could live through the surgery. Anyway, I had several operations on my legs. It was a long road to recovery. Miss Hattie hired therapists and they worked diligently with me to teach me to use my muscles and legs again. And David repaired my face.”

“David?” By the tone of her voice he knew this man was special to her.

“He’s Miss Hattie’s son and a plastic surgeon. It took numerous skin grafts but he did an amazing job. He even repaired my ear.”

Falcon looked closely at her face and saw the beautiful woman she’d always been. There was no way to tell she’d been through such a horrific tragedy. There were so many questions in his head that he didn’t even know where to start. The anger that he carried through the years wasn’t there anymore. All he felt was empathy for what she’d been through.

“When did you realize you had a husband and a child in Horseshoe?”

She glanced down at her hands in her lap. “It was probably about six years before I had the full picture.”

“And yet, you didn’t call home or ask anyone else to. You let us believe the worst.”

She kept staring down at her hands. “I know it’s hard to understand. But I woke up a completely different person from the shy, timid Leah that you knew. I always had this feeling that no one loved me until you filled that empty place in me. But then I met Miss Hattie and David and they loved me unconditionally. After two and a half years in the facility, Miss Hattie took me home to her house and hired a nurse and a therapist for me. I was on a walker and I couldn’t believe that she cared that much about me. We became the best of friends.”

“You had a family in Horseshoe who loved you.”

“I know,” she murmured, still looking at her hands. “After my memory came back, a day didn’t go by that I didn’t think of you and Eden, but I had so many health problems and I didn’t want to be a burden to you. I kept thinking once I got better I could go home. The surgeries to my face took a long time and it took forever for me to regain my strength. Each day was a struggle and I didn’t want to put the responsibility on you and your family.”

He stood up again as emotions hit him like a slap in the face. Why couldn’t she come home? He didn’t understand that. “When we got married, the vows said in sickness and in health. Did you forget that?”

She looked at him for the first time. “I caused all this misery to myself because I didn’t have the courage to care for my child. I ran away instead. That’s all on me and it was hard to live with. I didn’t want to come home until I was fully well. But then things happened.”

“Like what?”

“Miss Hattie had a stroke and I couldn’t leave then. She’d been so good to me and I had to stay to help her. She took care of me and I had to take care of her. She was the loving mother I never had. And David and I grew closer. He was just as nice and loving as his mother. I never had that kind of love in my life.”

It finally dawned on Falcon. “Oh, this David is who you want to marry. This David is why you want a divorce. This David is why you have finally come home, only to leave again. That’s not fair to Eden and it’s not fair to me.”