Christmas With The Cowboy

Emma was right, and it totally grated.

His knee ached after a long day and he wasn’t sure which hurt most, the smooth dismount while roping the mechanical bull or the multiple awkward exits from the saddle while working in the pasture. There was definitely a learning curve to remembering to guard the knee. Should have worn his brace.

Except, he hated the brace. Sure, it was worn under his jeans but he felt like everyone knew it was there.

He also refused to take the narcotics or the muscle relaxers that the physician ordered. Instead, Zach grabbed the familiar tube of prescription analgesic cream from his bag.

With a dab of cream in his hand, Zach rolled up the pant leg of his sweats and massaged the scars with vengeance. Six months ago, after the last unsuccessful surgery, he had come face-to-face with his future. Like the ranch kids, he was exploring his new normal.

In his last covert reconnaissance operation, Zach not only lost his best friend, Ian Clark, but his career and life as he’d known it for twelve years had been buried.

No matter how many surgeries he endured, he would never be 100 percent fit for duty again. The military docs were big on reminding him that he was fortunate to be alive, much less walk.

Lately, he was feeling far from grateful. What would he say to Ian’s family when he visited them?

Sorry I made it and Ian didn’t?

No, that wasn’t going to cut it for parents with only one child, a child who was not coming home.

Zach hung his head.

He’d postponed meeting with the Clarks multiple times, waiting until he could figure that out. In the meantime, life as he knew it was over. A washed-up navy SEAL. Who was Zach Norman outside of the uniform? He didn’t know, but he was about to find out.

As if on cue, the bunkhouse door flew open and Dutch Stevens, the wrangler Zach met earlier in the day, strode into the room, his scuffed boots beating a rhythm on the oak floorboards. The wizened cowboy tipped back his well-worn Western hat and pointedly stared at Zach’s knee.

“That’s quite a few scars you got there.”

“A road map to the unknown after three surgeries.”

“Ouch.” Dutch grimaced.

“It looks worse than it is.”

“Not from where I stand, so I guess I’ll have to take your word for that.” Dutch shook his head. “Did you meet Tripp Walker, the equine manager?”

“Yeah. Talkative guy.”

Dutch chuckled. “Tripp believes that if more people would think before they spoke, they’d open their mouth a whole lot less.”

“He’s on to something.”

“Not sure I agree with him. But that’s our Tripp.” He rubbed his chin and kept talking. “Anyhow, he’s got weights and a bench set up for the staff in the back of the equipment barn near Travis’s office. Use them anytime you like.”

“Thanks, Dutch.”

“You looked pretty good out there roping with Travis. Like maybe you’ve done that before.”

“A time or two,” Zach admitted. “Did a little bulldogging in my time, as well as heading and heeling.”

“You don’t say?” The words held a tinge of awed respect. “A real cowboy then. I suspected as much.”

“My father used to run a ranch outside of Pawhuska. That’s how I met the Maxwell kids. When they were pulled out of foster care by a relative, they lived right next door.”

Dutch gave a slow nod. “Sure. That’s right. Jay Norman. Retired a few years ago. Steve was your brother?”

“Half brother.”

“Sorry for your loss.”

“Thanks.”

“I was out of town during the funeral. I guess I missed meeting you then.”

Zach nodded. He’d been in and out on the day of the funeral. Arrived on the red-eye and left before sunset.

“Shame for Emma and those babies. She and Steve weren’t married very long, either.”

“No, I guess not.”

“I know she’s glad to have Steve’s family here.”

“Maybe so,” Zach murmured.

“You’re gonna need linens if you’re staying.” Dutch walked over to a closet and pulled open the door. “They’re in here.”

“Thanks, but who said I’m staying?” Zach asked.

“Aw, don’t worry. Travis said to zip my lips. I can do that on occasion.”

“I appreciate it. So where do you bunk?” Zach asked.

“Over yonder.” He raised a thumb. “Couple of bunkhouses to the right. This here is the guest bunkhouse.”

“I’m the only guest?”

“For the moment.” Dutch gave a nod, obviously still thinking and sizing up Zach.

“So you grew up with the Maxwells?” Dutch continued.

“I did.” Zach smiled as he recalled the first time he saw Emma. Five years old, with long dark braids, a big grin, full of sass and already riding. He hadn’t thought about that in a long time.

“Must have been pretty young, huh?” Dutch said.

“Too young. No one should have to deal with the death of their parents and then have their foundation ripped out from under them like they did.”

“Yet, that’s exactly what our kids here on Big Heart Ranch deal with. All of them.”

Zach paused. “I hadn’t thought of it like that.”

“Sure enough. That’s what has made Lucy, Travis and Emma so determined to turn around the burden of their past. They took the land their mother’s cousin left them in Timber and started this ranch. A new beginning.” He shook his head. “Those three bring good to everything they touch.”

“I believe that.” Zach put the cover back on the jar and tightened the lid. “How long have you been on Big Heart Ranch, Dutch?”

“Oh, a while and a half, for sure.”

“That long, huh?”

Hand on the doorknob, Dutch hesitated before he headed out. “You know, I was just like you, once upon a time. Came for a visit and ended up staying.”

Zach blinked at the bold statement. “I’m not staying. This is only temporary.”

“Oh?” The old cowboy stared him down. “Just sticking around until you finish mending?”

“My knee, you mean?”

He shook his head and offered a sly smile. “Don’t take offense, but I got a feeling the good Lord put you in the path of Big Heart Ranch for a reason and it’s got nothing to do with your knee.” Dutch tapped his own chest and placed a hand over his heart as his gaze met Zach’s.

Zach narrowed his eyes. “Though that isn’t my plan, I wouldn’t rule out the possibility.”

A grin lit up Dutch’s face, and he offered a nod of respect. “I expected an argument.”

“Not from me. I’ve learned to never say never. Life has tossed me into too many situations where my next move was completely a walk of faith.”

“Wise man,” Dutch murmured.

“I don’t know about that. Not so much wisdom as it is lots of experience making mistakes.” He rolled down the leg of his sweatpants. “Where’s that meeting I’m supposed to go to tonight?”

“Meeting? It’s a party. One of the biggest of the year.”

“Okay, where’s this mandatory fun I’m required to attend?”

“Downtown Timber. Oklahoma Rose restaurant. Across from the Timber General Store. There’s a parking lot behind the restaurant. Might make it easier on your leg.”

“Thanks.”

The door closed softly and Zach pulled out a bandanna to wipe his hands while thinking about his conversation with the wrangler.

Easier. He wasn’t handicapped. It was a simple knee injury. So he couldn’t jump out of planes anymore. That wasn’t a good enough reason for the world to keep trying to turn him into a desk jockey.

Zach paused. Unless they were right. If so, he wouldn’t be much use to Travis on the ranch either, would he?

Once again, the urge to leave rose up strong. What was he doing here anyhow? Had the Lord led him here or had he come to Oklahoma simply to clear his conscience?

Twice he had changed his mind during the long drive from California. The only thing that kept him from making a U-turn on I-40 eastbound was the promise made to Ian’s folks. He was determined to keep that promise. Their son was gone and they needed closure only Zach could provide. He was willing to relive the anguish of that mission to do that.

Besides, where would he go? He didn’t have a home anymore. His apartment in California had been cleared out and his few possessions put into storage until January.

Zach took a ragged breath and ran a hand through his hair. His gaze landed on last year’s photo Christmas card Emma had sent him that peeked out of his duffel. Elizabeth and Rachel.

His brother’s children. Family. They deserved so much more from him. He owed Emma and Steve that. In truth, he was long overdue for facing the past. It was time to man up. Maybe if he did he’d find the path to his future, however uncertain that future might be.

Chapter Three

“Candy canes?” Emma asked.

Lucy Maxwell Harris held up the plastic shopping bag that dangled from her right arm. “Check.”

Emma pulled open the door of the restaurant for her sister, who waddled past and headed into the Oklahoma Rose with a protective hand on her large abdomen.

“Whew.” Lucy ran a hand through her dark cap of hair and adjusted the Santa hat on her head. “Is it hot in here?”

“No. The female air-conditioning system is a little overworked during pregnancy.”

“Is that it?”

Emma nodded. “Any success finding mistletoe?”

“Got that, too. I bought extra to take home to Jack.”

“Isn’t Jack coming?” Emma asked.

“I wish. He’s in charge of the papier mâché volcano the kids are making for the science fair.”

“Hmm.” Emma shook her head. “Difficult to say who got the better assignment.”

Lucy sniffed appreciatively and glanced around. “Oh, this place smells wonderful. Is that steak? You know, I haven’t had anything to eat in over an hour.”

A hand to her mouth, Emma stifled a chuckle while grabbing a menu from a nearby empty table. “Here you go. We won’t let you starve. I promise.”

“They have sweet potato fries.” She shot Emma a conspiratorial glance. “Do not tell Jack, but it’s apparent that I got the better deal tonight.”

“May I help you?” the smiling hostess asked.

“Big Heart Ranch Christmas party,” Emma said. “I was here this morning. The manager said you could unlock the room for us.”

“Christmas? And here I thought that was a typo,” the woman murmured.

“We like to get a jump on the holidays at Big Heart.”

“I guess so. Do you want to schedule Groundhog Day now, as well?”

Emma choked on a laugh. “I’ll get back to you on that.”

They followed the woman through the restaurant, weaving past tables toward a banquet room. As they passed the small dance area where a band was setting up, Emma nudged her sister.

“Look. Live music tonight,” she said.

“Those are the Dixie Hens,” the hostess said, excitement lacing her voice. “They’re almost famous around these parts. Last year they went on tour with L.C. Kestner.”

“Who?” Lucy mouthed to Emma.

Emma shrugged and rolled her eyes.

“I’m happy to ask the band to play Christmas dance tunes for your group,” the woman continued.

“Thank you. That would be great,” Emma said.

“Planning to dance?” Lucy asked.

“Perhaps. I am, after all, highly skilled at the hokey-pokey. Ask my daughters.”

Lucy grinned as the hostess unlocked the door to a private room. Taking a step in, she paused to look up at the ceiling where glittering snowflakes suspended on clear fishing line gently swayed.

“Emma, this is beautiful.”

Emma peeked over her sister’s shoulder at the long tables covered with red tablecloths. Burlap runners decorated the center of the tables and were dotted with mason jars tied with red and green ribbons and filled with berried greenery. In the corner of the room, an artificial Christmas tree complete with ornaments and twinkling colored lights stood proudly. Red and green envelopes with the staff’s holiday stipends tucked inside also hung from the branches.

“I love Christmas.” Emma sighed with pleasure and inspected the room once again. “It did turn out nice, didn’t it?”

“Come on, Em. Nice? This is perfect. Rustic and Christmassy. This is the perfect way to launch the Holiday Roundup.”

“That’s what I thought, too.”

“What’s in those shiny silver favor boxes next to each place setting?”

“My secret recipe truffles to take home.”

Lucy did a double take. “You’re amazing. When did you have time to decorate if you were baking?”

“I snuck over here this afternoon after the cutout cookies were done.”

“Of course you did. I forget that you inherited the family gene for OCS.”

“What?”

“Overcommitted syndrome. Emma, do you ever relax?”

“Sometimes.” Relaxing only gave her time to think. She didn’t need more time to think than she already had.

“Try to remember the D word that Jack taught me when he hired Iris as my admin.”

“D word?”

“Delegate, Em. Delegate.”

“Delegate, huh? That certainly sounds odd coming from the queen of micromanaging.”

“Be nice. I’m still a work in progress.” She glanced at Emma. “What happened to your admin?”

“It turned out she was allergic to the ranch. I’ll get around to hiring a new one, soon enough,” Emma said. “So did you bring your gift to trade?”

Lucy gasped. “The gift exchange!”

Emma reached into her tote bag and handed Lucy a wrapped box. “No worries. I brought several in case someone forgot theirs.”

“Okay, this time your OCS saved the day. What’s inside?”

“I can’t tell you. That spoils the fun of the exchange.”

“Ow,” Lucy moaned. “Junior just kicked me.” She placed one hand on her belly and one on her lower back.

“How are you feeling, Luce?”

“Large.” She sighed. “And don’t you dare laugh.”

“Trust me, you are not large. Not like I was, expecting twins.”

“Tell that to my lower back. And my feet are so swollen that I can’t wear my red cowboy boots.” She grimaced. “Aren’t you glad you asked?”

“Think positive. You’re having a Christmas baby.”

“I am thinking positive. I’m positive that my back is killing me.”

“Turn around.”

Lucy obliged and Emma massaged her sister’s lower back with the heel of her hand.

“Bliss,” Lucy murmured. “Oh, look, our staff are arriving.”

The band began to play an upbeat and popular Christmas tune at the same time the front door of the restaurant opened and the party guests began to pour in to the small foyer. The scene seemed straight out of a holiday movie. Everyone was smiling, laughing and carrying gaily wrapped presents. Snow falling outside would have made things complete, but the November weather continued to be unseasonably warm.

“Look,” Lucy said. “Dutch is already on the dance floor.”

“It’s hard to resist a rousing chorus of ‘Frosty the Snowman.’”

Shivers swept through Emma and she immediately turned her attention back to the front door of the restaurant. Zach had arrived. He wore a nondescript gray dress shirt and charcoal slacks. Nondescript on anyone but Zach.

“Zach is here,” Lucy commented.

“I see him,” Emma murmured. She swallowed and put a hand to her chest where her heart beat wildly.

Lucy tilted her head and blatantly stared at the tall former navy SEAL. “Why was it you fell for Steve instead of Zach?”

For a brief second the answer stumped Emma. Then she remembered. Steve had courted her. Zach had never made a single overture beyond friendship. She’d fallen for the Norman brother who’d first loved her.

“I’ve always preferred my life simple,” Emma said aloud. “Zach is anything but simple.”

“He’s simply handsome.” Lucy sighed.

“Definitely hard to ignore,” Emma admitted.

“Yes. Which would be why every woman in the restaurant is checking him out,” Lucy said.

“The man is completely oblivious.”

Lucy grinned. “Just like my Jack. I like that in a man.”

Emma laughed. “You’re incorrigible, Lucy.”

“Do you ever think about dating, Em?”

“Women with small children don’t have time to date. What is dating anyhow? It’s auditioning husbands. I’m not looking for another husband.”

“That’s not all it is. It can be cultivating a friendship with someone with the same interests as you.”

“I don’t have time to cultivate anything but dirty laundry and mold in my refrigerator.”

“While I can relate to that, I’m guessing your house is spotless.”

“All the same, the last thing I need is a man in my life. I’m not ready for that kind of challenge. I may never be ready.”

“Zach was always your friend. You could do worse than Zach Norman in your life in any capacity.”

Emma’s hand froze. “What are you talking about?”

“I’m just saying.”

“Well, don’t. Zach is like a brother to me.” She silently corrected herself. He was never a brother to her. A best friend? Yes. Though that bond had disappeared once she married Steve. She had struggled many times over the past few years trying to figure out why they couldn’t at least be friends.

“Zach? Like your brother?” Lucy echoed Emma’s words. “Um, not exactly.” She turned and met Emma’s gaze, then released a small gasp. “You’re afraid.”

Emma glanced away and didn’t answer her sister.

“Em,” she said softly. “Steve died in a car accident. Three years ago. You’re entitled to grieve in your own way and in your own time, but please, don’t let fear get a foothold in your life.”

“I won’t have the rug pulled out from under me again. I might not survive the next time.”

“There are no guarantees for any of us, Emma. You and Travis and I know that firsthand. In fact, every child on Big Heart Ranch knows that lesson.”

“Lucy,” Emma warned.

The eldest Maxwell sibling was silent for a long moment staring across the restaurant at Zach. “Do you ever wonder why Zach has stayed away?”

“I assumed it was something between him and Steve. I’ve asked. The man circles any sort of substantial answer with vague responses.”

“You have eight weeks to find out what’s going on in that navy SEAL head of his.”

“Eight weeks?” Emma’s hand shot to her lips, setting the decorative red and green sleigh bells on her bracelet into tinkling motion. “What are you talking about?”

“He’s here until January.”

“Says who?”

“Me. I signed off on his HR paperwork this morning.”

“I’m confused. Why would Zach have paperwork with Big Heart Ranch?”

“Travis hired him.”

Emma’s jaw dropped. “Zach?”

“Yes. He picked up his security badge this morning.”

“Why would Zach...? Why would Travis...?” she sputtered.

“Uh-oh. Don’t look now, but Mr. Navy SEAL has his eye on you,” Lucy said.

“What?” She turned toward the door.

“He’s sort of lost out there in the crowd. Go save him,” Lucy said quietly.

Emma blew a soft raspberry. “Zach Norman does not need saving.”

“Everyone needs saving, Emma.”

“Fine. Whatever.” She started across the room, pausing at intervals to greet the staff.

Zach’s gaze followed her the entire time.

“I heard you’re staying until January,” she said when she was finally standing in front of him, looking up at all six feet five inches of solid muscle.

Zach offered a silent scrutiny, his expression shuttered.

“Well?” she prompted.

“Hi to you, too, Emma.” He nodded and stared at her. “Blinking reindeer earrings, huh?” His gaze moved to assess her holiday party outfit. “Interesting sweater.”

She glanced down at the knit vest with the ornament embellishments. “Ugly sweater contest.”

“I’m guessing you’re going to win.”

When Zach winked, Emma’s eyes widened with surprise.

Focus, Emma.

She pushed the hair back from her face, setting her jingle bell bracelet into motion. The sound was a welcome distraction.

“Nice bracelet,” he said.

She began to smile and then remembered that she was annoyed. The man had bested her. Again.

“So is it true? Are you staying?” she asked.

“Who told you?”

“The source is really not important.”

“I’m working for Travis.”

“You are so stubborn. You’ll work for Travis, though your knee says otherwise, but you refuse to even discuss RangePro.”

When Zach just stared at her, Emma almost backed down from the stormy gaze. Instead, she stood her ground and refused to look away.

“Could we call a truce on this whole RangePro thing? At least until the holidays are over?” he finally said. “I mean, isn’t this time of year supposed to reflect peace on earth? Goodwill to all men?” Zach paused. “Even me?”

Emma wilted at his quote from the Bible. Suddenly, she recalled the kid next door forced to return home to an apathetic mother for the holidays when he longed to stay at his father’s ranch for Christmas.

Ashamed of herself, she took a deep breath. Why was it the man brought out the cranky and uncharitable in her?

Big Heart Ranch staff continued to enter the restaurant, pushing Emma closer to Zach as they tried to make their way to the banquet room.

Emma stepped back, struggling to overcome with a smiling face and a positive attitude. “You’re right. I apologize.”

“A holiday truce, then?”

When Zach held out a hand, she nodded and stared at his hand, afraid to actually touch him. “A truce it is. The party is this way.” She started toward the back of the restaurant.

“Excuse me, Emma,” a woman said from behind her.

She turned. “Oh, Zach, this is Josee. One of our wranglers.”

“Pleased to meet you, ma’am.”

“Zach, is it?” the pretty blond-haired woman asked.

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Would you like to dance?”

“Pardon me?” Zach’s eyes widened as his gaze skimmed the dance floor.

“I wondered if you’d like to dance,” Josee repeated.

“I’m so sorry, ma’am. I already promised this dance to Emma.”

“Another time, then.” Josee smiled and looked from Zach to Emma with curiosity before she turned away.

“You didn’t promise me this dance.”

“I fully intended to.” Laughter filled his gray eyes. “Besides, isn’t this your favorite song?” he asked.

Emma cocked her head. “That’s ‘Jingle Bell Rock.’”

He held out his hand. The hand she’d avoided only minutes before.

“As if you really want to dance,” Emma mumbled.

“Are you going to turn me down in front of all these people?”

Emma glanced around at the speculative gazes turned their way. He had her and he knew it.

Leaving her no choice, Zach took her hand. “It’s a two-step,” he said. “Your other hand goes to my shoulder and then you step.”

“I know how to dance.” She hesitantly placed her left hand on his shoulder. “What about your knee?”

“Let me worry about my knee.”

“But...”

Zach shook his head. “You’re a substitute mother to sixty some kids at Big Heart Ranch. That’s plenty, don’t you think? Besides, I don’t need a momma.”

“I... I...” What was he saying? Didn’t he realize that she could not concentrate on the conversation while her hand was enveloped in his?

A long silence stretched between them as Emma worked hard not to tangle her feet and fall on her face.

When Lucy walked past the dance floor and her gaze connected with Emma’s, her sister stopped and did a double take.

“Lucy sure looks, um, ripe,” Zach said. “When’s she due?”

“Christmas.”

“Christmas. Everything seems to revolve around Christmas.”

“Only for eight weeks of the year.”

“Only eight weeks,” he murmured.

Emma turned her head and stared at her hand in his. His hand was so large, yet hers seemed to fit perfectly.

“This is quite the crowd,” he observed.

“This is nothing. Wait until Thanksgiving.”

“Was I supposed to bring a present?” Zach asked with a nod toward the guests who walked past with gifts tucked under their arms.