Matthew's Children

Ever since, work had been her only safe outlet.

But she couldn’t tell him that.

She struggled to think of something to say. “I joined a health club last September.”

He laughed. “That’s your news?”

“Hey, it was a big step for me.”

“Do you ever go?”

“To use the sauna and the hot tub,” she confessed.

“I joined a health club, too.”

“The Executive Club downstairs?”

“Yes.”

“I thought I saw you there the other day.” She’d gone to unwind in the sauna after a grueling day in court. As she’d headed for the change rooms, she’d noticed Matthew running laps, his face so tense she’d ached for him.

“We’ll have to meet for a workout sometime.”

She nodded, assuming they wouldn’t. “How are your brothers?”

“Nick’s still busting his butt, hoping for that promotion to detective. And Gavin’s living the small-town dream in New Hampshire, with his new wife, Allison, and his daughter, Tory.”

Though she’d never met anyone in Matthew’s family, Matthew talked about them a lot. She had a soft spot for Gavin, who had lost his daughter Samantha, Tory’s twin, in a terrible accident about two years ago. “I heard that Gavin remarried. That’s good.”

“Yeah, it is. Allison’s been great for him. And for Tory. Even Mom likes her.”

“And how’s your mom? Is she handling the changes in your life okay?”

“She’s not happy about the divorce. But since she sold the house and moved into a condominium for seniors, she’s doing a lot better. She’s made friends and isn’t so anxious anymore.”

Matthew gave her a speculative look tinged with sympathy. “How’s your dad? Have you visited him lately?”

“Two Christmases ago.” Back in the days when she and Matt had worked together often, she’d confessed how ambivalent she felt about her dad’s second marriage. She was glad he was happy, but his life was so full now he didn’t have much time left for her.

Oh, boo-hoo, Jane. You’re an adult. Stop feeling sorry for yourself. She straightened her back. “So. Are we all caught up now? Can we finally discuss our case?”

Matt laughed ruefully. “Back to business, huh?”

“You said you met Coach Keller at a party for your son’s soccer team. So you know him quite well then.”

“Not really. This is the first year he’s coached Derrick’s team. It’s a volunteer position.”

She flipped a page in the file Russell had left for them. “The notes say Wally Keller is new to Hartford.”

“That’s right. His family moved from Maine for the start of the school year.”

“We’ll have to find out why.” Any hint of scandal behind the relocation wouldn’t bode well.

“Yes. He told me he was transferred through the accounting company where he works, but of course we’ll need to check that.”

They went through a list of discussion points regarding their new client. He’d been married fifteen years, had a son Derrick’s age and a younger daughter. His work history was solid, and he had no priors.

“He sounds like your average upstanding citizen,” Jane concluded at the end of half an hour.

“Let’s hope appearances aren’t deceiving.”

When they left the conference room, it was almost noon. In the old days they would have gone to the deli downstairs for a quick sandwich.

But times were different.

They stood in the hallway looking awkwardly at each other, before Jane finally broke away to catch the elevator. She thought Matt was watching her, but when she glanced back, he was gone.

He was probably planning to eat lunch in his office. That was what he seemed to do most days.

Down in the lobby she picked up a chef’s salad at the deli. But as she sat at a small table for two and tried to eat, her stomach refused to cooperate. She set down the plastic fork and gave up the effort.

Her career meant everything to her, and it hung in the balance. Russell Fielding had been tactful, yet he’d made it clear that this past year had put a strain not only on her and Matt, but on their coworkers, too.

For twelve months she’d been resisting the truth, but now she faced it. If she couldn’t get past this thing for Matthew, she would have to find another job.

AFTER THE MEETING with Jane, Matthew ordered a sandwich to be delivered to his desk. Work had been his sanctuary in the past, he certainly needed the escape today. He opened the top file from a stack and stared at lines of type that blurred into illegible scratching.

How did Jane feel about working with him again? Was any part of her, however small, happy at the prospect?

He was divorced now, so it wouldn’t be the same as before. He wouldn’t have to hide his admiration…or fight his attraction.

Yeah, right. Who was he kidding? After all he’d put her through, he was lucky she’d consented to work with him. Let alone anything more.

His phone rang. A client was in trouble. He’d been driving under the influence of alcohol when he’d had a traffic accident. His second that year.

Silently, Matthew swore at the stupidity of some people. “Here’s what you need to do…” he said.

Hours later, Matthew was talking to another client, this one in an even deeper mess, when he noticed the time. Ten minutes to seven. He scrolled down on his BlackBerry, then groaned. Derrick had a soccer game tonight, at seven-thirty.

In the past, Matthew had missed a lot of Derrick’s soccer games. But no longer. He’d vowed that this spring he would catch every game he possibly could.

He offered his client one last piece of advice, then scheduled a meeting for the following day. Quickly, he closed down his computer, then left the office. Derrick hated it when he came to the games dressed in his business attire, so he took the time to change at the Executive Club in the basement. That he might see Jane here crossed his mind, but he didn’t.

Finally, dressed in casual jeans and a sweater, he rode the elevator to the parking garage. Once he was behind the wheel of his Audi, he punched the address of the soccer field into the GPS.

Now that his son was in the league for older kids, he was expected to play all over Hartford. Matthew wasn’t familiar with most of the fields anymore, and the GPS had kept him from arriving late more than once.

As he drove past a burger joint, he realized he was starving. Hours had passed since that sandwich at noon. He longed to stop, but was afraid that if he did, he’d miss the opening kickoff. In the end, he arrived at the game five minutes early. The spring sky was cloudy, but rain didn’t appear imminent. As he headed for the bleachers, he spotted Gillian amid a group of other soccer moms. He settled on a bench as far away from her as possible.

He didn’t want his relationship with his ex-wife to be hostile—it wouldn’t be healthy for his kids. Yet he felt powerless to change things. Every conversation he tried to have with Gillian ended in an argument, with her making the same accusations and drawing the same—erroneous—conclusions as ever.

She hadn’t reacted to his arrival, yet he knew that somehow she had seen him. If ever he missed a game, she would be the first to call him on it.

His son’s team, the Blazers, was wearing blue-and-yellow uniforms. He searched for lucky number six, Derrick’s number, and spotted him goofing around with another kid, rough-housing on the sidelines.

Stuff like that never went on when Coach Keller was in charge, but of course Wally Keller wasn’t present today, and neither was his wife, Leslie. Andy Crosby, another of the soccer dads, was attempting to fill in. Judging by the flustered expression on his face as he jogged from one boy to another, giving instructions that were largely ignored, he wasn’t finding the job easy.

Coach Keller’s son, Daniel, was among the boys on the field, but Robert, Sarah Boutin’s brother, was absent. Matthew watched as Daniel, a large, athletic boy, took shots at the net. Matthew wondered if he’d been told what his father had been accused of. Did the other kids on the team know, too?

The referee blew his whistle and play began. The Blazers came out disorganized and weak, and five minutes into the game the opposing team scored. The team was hurting without their usual coach.

But something else was going on, Matthew realized. One of the Blazers’ midfielders went out of his way to jostle Daniel, who was playing center.

Well, that answered his question about how much the kids knew.

Poor Daniel.

By halftime the team was down two goals. The sun was low on the horizon and Matthew decided to use the short break in action to run to his car and grab his sunglasses.

To his discomfort, his ex-wife followed him.

Chapter Three

“HAVE YOU HEARD about Coach Keller?” Gillian asked. Her voice was stiff and censorious, as if somehow Matthew was to blame for the situation.

He slipped on his sunglasses. “Yeah, I have. Where’s Violet?”

“With a sitter.” Gillian sounded impatient. “Who told you about Keller?”

He wasn’t about to reveal that Wally Keller was now a client of the firm’s. “Who told you?” he countered.

“The soccer association sent out an e-mail. I didn’t see your address on the distribution list, though.” Her eyes narrowed suspiciously.

“Maybe you could ask them to add it for me. I would appreciate receiving e-mails about Derrick’s team.”

“Fine.”

He guessed she would have argued if she’d had any basis to do so. But since she claimed to want him more involved with Derrick’s life, how could she?

“Have you heard how Sarah’s doing?” he said. “I noticed Robert wasn’t here.”

“Neither of the Boutin kids was at school today, according to Derrick. I heard they were receiving counseling.”

“That’s good.”

Gillian shook her head. “I still can’t believe this could happen in our neighborhood. We need to screen our coaches more thoroughly from now on. It makes me sick to think that I trusted Wally Keller.”

“Maybe Keller isn’t responsible for what happened to Sarah.”

Gillian rolled her eyes. “Innocent until proven guilty.”

She’d heard him say the phrase so often the words had no meaning to her. Matthew couldn’t blame her. Most people he met felt the same way. Maybe because not that many of them had ever been accused of a crime they hadn’t committed.

“Please don’t tell any of the other parents you think Sarah is lying.”

“I didn’t say I thought Sarah was lying, Gillian.” But…it was possible.

In the course of his career, Matthew had seen it happen often enough. Children who were hurt or scared sometimes lied or made up scenarios for reasons that adults didn’t always understand. While Sarah’s sexual abuse seemed irrefutable, he wouldn’t automatically condemn Wally of the crime.

And he certainly felt sympathy for the Keller family. Leslie and her children didn’t deserve the grief that this was bringing them.

He didn’t like to think that Wally deserved it, either.

AFTER THE GAME, Matt waited on the sidelines for an opportunity to speak to his son. The boys lined up to shake one another’s hands, then each team huddled around their coach for a postgame wrap-up.

Due to his smaller size, Derrick was easy to pick out in the crowd. He appeared despondent after the loss, and left the field with his head low.

“Nice effort.” Matthew clasped Derrick’s sweaty shoulder. He referenced a play late in the second half when Derrick had set up the center for a goal. “That was a beautiful pass.”

For a second his son’s eyes gleamed. Then he shrugged. “We still lost.”

Unfortunately, that one goal hadn’t been enough.

Matt bit back the platitudes. You can’t win them all wasn’t something he wanted to hear after a bad court case. Neither was There’s always the next one or At least you gave it your best.

The truth was losing sucked. “You must be tired. I noticed you were playing shorthanded.”

Derrick nodded. “Some of the guys are thinking of quitting the team.”

Matthew needed a second to figure out why. “Because of Coach Keller?”

Derrick nodded. “Now we have to find a new coach.”

“What about the father who filled in today?”

“He doesn’t know a thing about soccer. He just stepped in at the last minute so we wouldn’t have to forfeit the game.”

“Oh.” Matt slipped his hands into the pockets of his jeans. Derrick shot him a quick look, then grabbed his soccer bag.

Silence stretched between them, and Matt realized that his son was waiting for something. Oh, cripes. Derrick wasn’t hoping Matthew would volunteer for the job, was he?

“I wish I could help, but my work is too unpredictable.” He was making most of the games, but no way could he handle practices, plus all the prep work in between.

“I know that.” Derrick sounded angry. “I didn’t ask you to, did I?” He swung his soccer bag over his shoulder and started toward Gillian’s car. His mother was sitting in the driver’s seat, waiting.

Matthew didn’t want the evening to end this way. “How about we grab a slushy? I’ll drop you off at home later.”

Derrick paused. He seemed tempted. But then he shook his head. “I’ve got an English assignment due tomorrow. I’d better go straight home.”

“Sure.” Matthew swallowed, but the hurt didn’t go anywhere. It stayed lodged in his throat, its favorite hangout.

He was being dissed, but he couldn’t blame Derrick. How many times had his son asked him for a little time, and Matthew had put him off because of work? It was such a cliché, the workaholic father, the needy son. Yet the pattern had been set and he didn’t know how to change it.

All he could do was keep trying. “Okay. Get your schoolwork done and I’ll see you on the weekend.”

“You mean next weekend, right? I’m at home this one.”

“Actually, no. Check the calendar, son. You were with your mom last weekend, so it’s my turn.”

“Fine.” Derrick nodded curtly, then upped his pace to a jog. Matthew watched him go, wishing he’d been able to give his son a hug. But there’d been no opportunity.

Or none that he could find.

“I CAN’T FREAKIN’ BELIEVE this.” Wally Keller had refused a chair, and was pacing the small meeting room. He had a broad face, stocky body and intelligent but now frightened-looking eyes.

An average dad, Matthew thought. In terrifying circumstances.

It was Tuesday afternoon, one o’clock. Jane had offered Wally Keller coffee at the beginning of their meeting, and when he’d refused, she’d poured a cup for herself. She was leaning against the sideboard now, mug in one hand, eyes trained warily on their new client.

Matthew didn’t blame her for being cautious. Keller was radiating tension and anger. Innocent people tended to behave that way when they were falsely accused of a crime. Unfortunately, guilty people often reacted the same way.

“You think you’re doing a good thing, coaching your kid’s soccer team. A lot of parents can’t be bothered. They drop their sons at the field, then drive off to run errands or go back to work.”

Matthew glanced down at his notebook. Guilty as charged. Not so much now, but in the past he’d definitely been one of the parents Wally Keller was describing.

“And this is my reward.” He stopped moving and gripped the back of a chair with enough strength to drain the blood from his knuckles.

For a moment Matthew trained his eyes on those hands. They were average-size for a man, but to a kid they would seem mighty intimidating. For a moment he found himself speculating. Was Keller guilty?

But that wasn’t a productive line of thought.

“This must be hard, Wally.” He and Jane had agreed that since Keller knew him, Matthew would lead the conversation.

He wanted to begin by offering a bit of hope. “Just because the police called you in for questioning doesn’t mean that charges will be laid.”

“God, I hope you’re right.”

“But we still have to be prepared,” Matthew continued. “We have a lot to cover. Why don’t you sit down.”

Wally hesitated, then nodded. Once he was seated, Jane took a place at the table, too. With a subtle nod in Matthew’s direction, she picked up her pen, indicating that she would keep notes, leaving him free to concentrate on the questions.

She’d always been able to anticipate where he was going in a way none of his other colleagues managed to. He smiled appreciatively then turned to Wally.

“We need to establish your relationship with Sarah Boutin.”

“There was no relationship!” Wally’s face reddened.

“Would you know her if you saw her?”

“Well, sure. Her twin brother plays for the Blazers. She used to watch all the games and often showed up at practices, too.”

“The practices?” That was unusual. Mostly, it was just the players who attended those. “Why?”

“She said girls’ soccer was boring and she liked working out with the boys better. I used to let her join in on some of the drills and exercises.”

“So you treated her just like the other kids on the team?”

“Well, not always. Sometimes she would follow me around and try to talk.”

“Did you have time to do that?” Jane seemed surprised.

“Not really. When you’re running a practice, you’re pretty busy. Setting up exercises, watching the kids, providing feedback.”

“What did Sarah like to talk about?” Matthew asked.

“I didn’t pay that much attention. Like I said, I couldn’t. But I do recall that she talked about her dad a lot. Her folks split up not that long ago. I gather her father left town. It was pretty obvious she missed having the old man around.”

Matthew nodded. At the preseason soccer party Sarah and Robert’s mother, Claudia Boutin, had cornered him. She’d told him that she, too, would soon be divorced. There had been a few awkward moments when he’d wondered if she was hitting on him.

He’d been rescued from potential embarrassment when Wally had asked for a volunteer to barbecue burgers. Matthew had practically raced out to the deck.

“It was pretty obvious the kid missed having her dad around,” Wally continued. “Frankly, she was disruptive, and I was often tempted to send her home, but I felt sorry for her and I didn’t.”

From his expression, he clearly regretted that decision. So did Matthew.

“Were you ever alone with her?”

“I’ve been thinking about that, and I can only think of one time.”

Damn. He’d been hoping there’d been no times. “What happened?”

“A thunderstorm brewed up during practice last week. I had the kids phone their parents to pick them up.”

Matthew remembered that night. Gillian had been busy with Violet’s gym class, so she’d phoned to see if he could get Derrick. He’d been at a meeting on the other side of the city, too far to reach the field on time. So he’d called Derrick and suggested he catch a ride with a neighbor.

“Did Sarah and Robert’s mother show up to get them?”

“No. I didn’t realize it, but Robert had accepted a ride home from a teammate who lived on the same block as the Boutins. I guess he forgot about his sister. When the storm hit, she was the only kid left on the field. The lightning seemed close. It was safer for the two of us to wait in my car. But her mother never did show up, and eventually, I drove Sarah home myself.”

Matthew glanced at Jane and saw the same dismay in her eyes that he was feeling. It was an emotion he did his best not to reveal as he asked, “How long were you and Sarah alone together?”

“Fifteen minutes, maybe twenty. If you count the drive home, half an hour.” Wally seemed to understand the potential danger in this, because he exploded with anger again. “What was I supposed to do? There was lightning, for God’s sake.”

“Where was the assistant coach?” Matthew wondered.

“Gone home.” Keller’s voice was little more than a growl. “He’d checked off all the boys’ names, so he decided he could leave.”

“Didn’t he realize Sarah was there?”

Keller shrugged. “You’ll have to ask him that. I sure as hell did.”

“Right.” Matthew got up from the table. “I’m going to grab a coffee. Changed your mind, Wally?”

The man hesitated, then nodded. Matthew left the room. This would give Jane an opportunity to question Wally without appearing to interrupt him. When he returned, Walter was in the middle of an answer.

“We were settling in okay before this happened.” He accepted the coffee with a faint thanks.

Good. She was filling in some of the background info. Matthew sat back in his chair and let Jane continue. She asked their client about his job and how the kids felt about the move. When she was done, Matthew had some more questions about Sarah. Over an hour passed before the meeting was finally concluded.

Together he and Jane escorted Keller to the elevator. Just before he got on, Wally turned to him.

“Thanks for helping me out, Matt. Three nights ago I met with the board of the soccer association. I could see the doubt on their faces when I told them I was resigning and why. Half of them have already decided that I’m guilty. But I’m not.” He stared Matthew straight in the eyes, his expression sincere and earnest.

Then the elevator arrived and he left.

“Do you believe him?” Jane asked quietly.

“Yeah. I think I do.”

Jane gave him a skeptical glance before sinking back against the paneled wall with only partly feigned exhaustion. “That was tough.”

Emotionally, yes, it had been. But Matthew’s adrenaline was flowing. He hadn’t felt so up for a new case in a long time. He didn’t kid himself why.

It was great working with Jane again.

“Want to go for a drink?”

She looked surprised, but her voice was collected. “Are you sure that’s a good idea?”

“I’m not married anymore, Jane. I believe it’s allowed.”

Chapter Four

SULLY’S TAVERN WAS A HALF flight of stairs below street level, just off Bushnell Park, and though it was a favorite haunt of trial lawyers, Jane hadn’t been there for over a year. She felt Matthew’s hand at the small of her back as she descended into the familiar, dimly lit haven. Matt guided her to one of the booths and her black skirt slid smoothly over the leather seat.

The music playing in the background was too subtle for her to place. She glanced around. Fewer than half the seats around them were occupied. She tented her hands on the clean, cool tabletop and waited until Matt was seated, too.

“It’s so quiet,” she said.

“Yeah. It’s weird to be here on a Monday.”

In the past they’d frequented Sully’s at the end of the work week. A bunch of them would gather here from Brandstrom and Norton—not just the partners but all the lawyers, and some admin staff, too. On Fridays the tavern was packed, the music loud and raunchy.

“It feels like a different place.”

“Too quiet?” Matt half rose. “We could go somewhere else.”

“This is fine.” The truth was she would feel uncomfortable wherever they went, because she hadn’t been in a social situation with him for a very long time.

She’d avoided Sully’s this past year in order to avoid him. In her heart she knew the reasons for his divorce had nothing to do with her. Yet, her conscience demanded that she keep her distance while he was going through the process of ending his marriage. Just knowing how she felt about him—and that her feelings had the potential to become much deeper if she let them—had been reason enough.

A server came and they placed their orders. Jane’s emotions steadied now that she had a drink in her hands. She swirled the glass and watched the ice cubes jostle in the translucent amber liquid.

Sometimes, when she was playing dangerous “what-if” games with herself, she wondered what would have happened if she and Matt had met each other much earlier—before Gillian. Jane was pretty sure he found her attractive. And she knew he liked her. So was she crazy to believe they might have ended up together?