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A Princess Under The Mistletoe
Instead, she poured herself a cup of tea and sat on the couch, blinking her eyes so she would stay awake.
* * *
Gavin ushered Sam in the door of the cottage. They’d returned much later than he’d intended, but the palace had ordered road construction on a twenty-four-hour basis. Despite the limited population of the Mediterranean island, there’d been a ton of traffic tonight.
Sam proudly carried the small white bag holding a cup of mostly melted gelato for Sara. He darted toward the den and skidded to a halt. He glanced up at Gavin. “She’s fast asleep,” Sam said in a loud whisper, using the language from some of the books Gavin and his mother had read to him.
Gavin gazed at the new nanny to his children and felt a shot of sympathy. He could understand her exhaustion. Between Sam’s fear of new people and Adelaide’s general crankiness, he’d wondered if he should ask for two nannies instead of one. He stepped closer to Sara, taking in the sight of her. Faint blue circles shadowed her eyes, but her skin was like ivory porcelain. Her dark eyelashes spread like fans under her closed eyelids and a heavy strand of her dark hair covered one eye. Her pink lips parted slightly, almost as if in invitation.
Her body was slim, but hinted at the warm curves of a woman. A thud of awareness settled in his gut, startling him. He shook it off. Heaven knew he had no room for those kinds of thoughts. His kids needed him and he needed to get himself centered. Gavin and his late wife had grown apart during the past couple of years. They’d tried to put things back together—that was how Adelaide had happened. But he’d been concerned when Lauren had gotten pregnant again because she’d suffered from postpartum depression after she’d given birth to Sam. Even though he knew Lauren’s death had been an accident, he still couldn’t shake his feeling of guilt. He wasn’t sure he ever would.
Sam nervously clutched the paper bag between his hands. Sara’s eyes fluttered at the sound and she glanced up at both of them. She winced and straightened. “Oh, no. I fell asleep. What time is it?”
Gavin glanced at his watch. “Ten after eight,” he said.
“Oh,” she said, laughing. “Eight-minute nap. Ten at the most. Welcome back. Shall I pour you some tea?” she asked Gavin. “Would you like something to drink, Sam?”
“I’m not a big tea drinker,” Gavin said. “We’ll both take water. Sam has something for you.”
Sara looked at Sam and saw the paper bag he held. She smiled and clapped her hands together. “Oh, don’t tell me what it is. Let me guess,” she said. “Is it pizza?”
Sam shook his head.
“Is it cheese and crackers?”
Sam shook his head.
“Is it a bunny?”
Sam shook his head and his little mouth lifted in a grin. “Here,” he said, offering the bag to her.
She opened the bag and pulled out the small cup of gelato and took off the top. She dipped her head and took a swipe with her tongue. “Hazelnut. My favorite. Thank you so much. What kind did you have?”
“Chocolate and marshmallow,” Sam said.
“I took your advice and got the hazelnut. You were right. It’s pretty good. You’d probably better eat that quickly. We got caught in road construction, so it’s melted.”
“Just nice and soft. Let me get your water,” she said as she headed for the kitchen.
As soon as she left, Sam turned to him. “She’s pretty, but she’s a terrible guesser.”
Gavin couldn’t shut off his awareness of her presence. It wasn’t all bad. She smiled easily and something about her made everything feel a little less dark and gloomy. She talked with Sam even though he rarely gave her a verbal response.
“Go to bed,” Gavin told her although it was early. “Tomorrow’s another day.”
She nodded. “So it is. Shall I put Sam to bed?”
Gavin shook his head. “No. That’s my treat. I’ll take the first middle-of-the-night wake-up, but I’d appreciate it if you would take the second.”
Her eyes widened. “Two wake-ups?”
He shrugged. “We’re still adjusting.”
“Then I’ll try to be ready. Good night, Sam. Thank you for the delicious gelato.”
Sam nodded and Gavin nudged his son. “Say you’re welcome.”
“You’re welcome,” Sam echoed in a small voice.
“Sweet sleep to both of you,” she said, and then she left the room.
* * *
Sometime when it was dark, Sam awakened. He felt panic overtake him. His heart raced. He glanced toward the cartoon night-light and took a deep breath.
He took more deep breaths and thought about his mother. She had left, then never come home again. He missed her so much. He didn’t want to lose anyone else.
Sliding out of his bed, he silently scampered to his father’s room. The door wasn’t closed all the way. Sam pushed it open and went inside. His father was on his back, softly snoring.
Sam felt a sliver of relief. He watched his father for several more moments. Then he wandered down the hall to the new nanny’s bedroom. Her door was also open. He wandered inside and saw her sleeping on her side. He heard an odd sound. It took a moment for him to figure out what it was.
The ocean. Waves. He loved that sound.
He loved the sound so much he wanted to hear it more. He decided to lie down on the carpet. Sam wished he had a blanket, but he liked the sound more than he missed his blanket.
As the swooshing sound continued, he calmed down and felt droopy and sleepy. He didn’t remember when he fell asleep.
* * *
Sara awakened to an unfamiliar sound. She heard a series of humming and grunting sounds and frowned as she shifted in her bed. Staring into the darkness, she saw a small figure on her floor. It took a moment for her to figure out who it was. Sam.
Sliding from her bed, she picked him up and held him against her. He startled.
“It’s okay. I’m your nanny. Sara,” she said, walking toward his room.
“But—”
Gavin appeared in the hallway. “What happened? I usually find him sleeping on the floor of my bedroom.”
“He was in my bedroom.”
Gavin gathered his son into his arms. “What’s up, bud?”
“I liked the waves,” he said.
Gavin looked at her curiously.
“My sound machine,” Sara said. “I keep it on an ocean setting.” She looked toward Sam and stroked his forehead. “Would you like to hear the waves at night?”
He nodded.
“Done,” she said. Then she went and moved her sound machine to Sam’s bedroom.
With his hands on his hips, Gavin stood looking at his son. Protecting his son, she thought. His stance tugged at her heart. She couldn’t remember a time she’d awakened to the sight of her father watching over her. Stop, she told herself, closing her eyes. Her life was all about now and the future. No whining about the past.
Taking a deep breath, she opened her eyes and found Gavin staring at her. He crooked a finger at her and pointed toward the hallway. She followed him outside the door of Sam’s bedroom.
“That’s a first,” Gavin said. “For six months Sam has been coming into my bedroom and staring at me, making sure I’m not going to leave him forever. The way, in his eyes, his mother did.”
Her heart twisted at his words. “He’s had a hard time. You’ve all had a hard time.”
Gavin gave a slow nod, and she was all too aware of his height, his power, his masculinity. “Yeah, we have. Who would have known a sound machine would make such a difference?”
She shrugged, knowing that the sound machine was her secret to a good night’s sleep. “Yeah. Who would have known?”
“Thank you,” he said, lowering his head toward hers.
She caught her breath.
He squeezed her arm. “Get some sleep.”
Sara nearly collapsed in a combination of relief and strange disappointment. She stared after him and felt a flip in her stomach. Yes, she definitely needed more sleep.
Hours later, she heard the sound of Gavin’s voice. She immediately sat up in her bed. His voice was coming from the nursery. She glanced at the clock in her room. Seven thirty.
Sara leaped from her bed and ran into the nursery. “Problems?” she asked. “I can’t believe I slept this late.”
Gavin, still wearing pajamas, was changing Adelaide’s diaper. “She hasn’t slept this long in forever. She wet through her diaper to her sheets.”
“Oops,” she said.
Gavin shrugged. “It’s a good problem. Did you do something different with her bedtime routine?”
“I played a little Bach on the piano,” she said.
Gavin glanced at her. “Must have worked.”
She shrugged. “We can hope.”
“Yeah,” he said.
“Can I take a quick shower?”
“Sure,” he said. “You’re due that after the past twenty-four hours.”
Sara grabbed a quick shower, rubbed herself dry and wrapped her hair in a towel for two minutes. Pulling on her clothes, she ditched the towel and pulled her hair into a wet knot at the back of the neck, all the while resolving to take her bath at night. She’d just been too tired last night.
Racing into the kitchen, she smiled her best smile. “I’m here for duty,” she said.
Three pairs of brown eyes stared back at her full of hope, fear and expectation.
“All right. Let’s get going.”
“You’re a brave woman,” Gavin said. He was dressed to head out the door. “Or crazy,” he muttered as he handed Adelaide over to her. “Just tell me you’ll last the week.”
Sara blinked. “Week? I thought this was at least a two-or three-month assignment.”
“Yes. Of course. Three months,” Gavin said. “Call me if you need me,” he added as he headed out the door.
“But you don’t really want me to call you, do you?” she said.
He paused just before he closed the door behind him. “Truth...” he said, turning around to face her. “I’m grateful for all you’ve already done. Call me for anything.”
Her heart took a strange twist and turn. He was a great father. Maybe even a great human being.
Chapter Two
Sara fed the kids, then secured them into child safety seats in her car. Sam attended preschool three days each week and this was one of his designated days. She’d also prepared a snack for him to eat.
Driving toward the small building, she got into the short car line.
“I don’t like preschool,” Sam said.
Sara glanced at him from the rearview mirror. “What’s not to like? You get to play and meet other children. You get to make things and eat a snack.”
“I don’t like my teacher,” he said. “She’s mean.”
“Mean,” Sara echoed. “What do you mean she’s mean? Does she hit you?”
“No,” he said reluctantly. “She won’t leave me alone. Sometimes I don’t want to play with everyone else.”
“You can play by yourself when you get home. Preschool is good for you. It’s only for a few hours. Maybe you can help someone else who is having a bad day,” she said in the most firm, positive nanny voice she could muster. “I’ll be back to pick you up before you know it.”
She wanted to give him a hug and kiss but knew he wasn’t interested in her affection. Just her sound machine, so far, she thought wryly.
Sara returned home with Adelaide and attempted to get more settled in to her bedroom. She called her sister to check on her, but the call went straight to voice mail. Who knew what her sister was up to? Tabitha was working as a hostess at an exclusive restaurant until the Devereaux family could help find a more suitable position for her.
Tabitha had seemed more than a bit restless lately, and that worried Sara. Their brother, Alex, had persuaded them to leave their home country for safety concerns. He’d assured them he would meet them in Chantaine, but he was nowhere to be found. Tabitha hadn’t tolerated any sort of restraints on her activities very well in the past and she’d been known to act impulsively. Sara hoped Tabitha would be able to keep herself under control a little longer.
Closing her eyes for a moment, Sara took a deep breath and tried to shake off her worries. There was little she could do about Tabitha since they weren’t supposed to be seen together, and there was nothing she could do about her brother. She needed to focus on the present. Who knew what the future would bring?
She picked up Sam from preschool and he presented her with a note from the teacher. Sara decided to pass it along to Gavin later and tried to converse with Sam to no avail. After asking ten questions and trying several times to start a conversation, she decided to shut up. Maybe Sam was decompressing.
Just as she pulled into the driveway, she heard Sam’s heavy sigh. “Everyone is talking about Christmas,” he said in a grumbly voice.
“Well, it’s that time of year. We’ll need to get a tree and decorate soon.”
“Bet Daddy won’t want one,” he said.
Sara looked at Sam in surprise. “Why not?”
“He doesn’t want to do anything fun,” Sam muttered. “Can I go inside?”
“Of course,” she said, and she unbuckled his seat belt.
In contrast to the previous day, the afternoon passed quietly. The part-time housekeeper and cook arrived to clean and prepare meals. Janece Dillon, a lovely middle-aged woman, prepared several meals to freeze for later. “So, you’re the new nanny,” Janece said. “You look so young.”
“Thank you. That’s what Mr. Sinclair said to me. I’m actually twenty-seven,” she said.
“Well, I hope you’ll be able to stay around for the sake of the mister and his little ones,” she said.
“What do you mean?” Sara asked, carrying Adelaide on her hip.
“Well, there have been quite a few,” Janece said as she stirred a pot of pasta sauce. “Nannies, that is. Poor man and his children have been through so much.”
Sara hadn’t been told there’d been several previous nannies. That must be why Gavin had expressed hope that she would make it through the week.
That evening after Gavin arrived home, she slipped him the note from Sam’s teacher. “I didn’t read it,” she said.
He opened the note and sighed, raking his hand through his hair. “I don’t know what to do. He hates going for therapy. He doesn’t like preschool. I feel like we’re not making any progress with him.”
“It hasn’t been that long,” she said. “Just six months, right?”
“But he’s four years old and he hardly ever smiles,” he said.
“He smiled when you took him for ice cream,” she said, wanting to encourage him.
He looked at her and chuckled. “That’s not something I can do every night.”
“True,” she said. “But we can figure out other things. His favorite foods. Maybe a pet would help.”
“A pet?” he echoed. “I’m barely surviving with these two. Add in an animal and I’ll have to wave a white flag.”
She shrugged. “I wasn’t allowed pets when I was a child. Except one of my nannies allowed me to sneak in a few visits with her hamster, Willie. That was a lot of fun.”
“Why so many nannies?” he asked. “I can’t imagine you causing a lot of trouble, although most of us can’t resist getting into trouble every now and then.”
“I didn’t,” she said. Was that a hint of a sexy glint in his eye? Or was she imagining it? “I stayed out of trouble. My sister and brother, though, made up for me.”
“Is your family originally from Chantaine?” he asked.
“No. We’re from the mainland, but my parents did a lot of traveling,” she said. Uncomfortable with the curiosity she glimpsed in his gaze, she waved toward the stove. “Janece left a pot of pasta and sauce for dinner tonight. Sam has wandered in here a few times, but I thought you might like to eat together.”
“That will work, and it’s one of his favorite meals,” he said. “I’ll wash up, change clothes and help serve it.”
“I can serve it,” she said. “I just don’t possess advanced cooking skills.”
“Me neither,” he said. “That’s why a part-time cook and housekeeper was part of my package of compensation for this job. And a nanny,” he said, meeting her gaze. “The children may not show it yet, but we’re glad you’re here to help.”
“Speaking of helping, we need to think about celebrating the holidays. Sam mentioned that everyone at preschool is talking about Christmas.”
Gavin raked his hand through his hair. “I haven’t really been in the mood for Christmas.”
“Well, you can’t just ignore it,” she said. “Children love Christmas.”
“Maybe we should keep it low-key this year,” he said.
“Sam mentioned that he didn’t think you would want decorations,” she said.
“He may be right. Besides, we left our decorations in storage in the States.”
“He also said you don’t want to do fun things anymore. It’s not my place to tell you how you should act, but perhaps if he saw that you could enjoy some aspects of life, then maybe he would feel free to do so, also.”
Gavin stared at her for a long moment. “You’re right. It’s not your place to tell me how to act.”
Sara felt his assertion for her to step back. Yes, sir, she thought. Adelaide let out a squawk from her infant seat. She’d been snoozing and now clearly wanted to be entertained. “Dinner may take a few more minutes. I suspect the queen of the house will need her diaper changed and she doesn’t like to wait. Can’t say I blame her,” said Sara.
* * *
After dinner, Sara took Sam and Adelaide for a walk down the street while Gavin worked on the palace construction project for a bit. “A beautiful evening for a walk, isn’t it, Sam?”
Sam shrugged and stuck his hands in his pockets. “I wanted to play my video game.”
“You can do that tomorrow. The sun is still shining, so we should take advantage. Getting outside is good for you. I always loved getting outside when I was a child.”
Sam glanced up at her and sighed. “Did you have video games?”
“Not that I remember,” she said. “I had a piano and my house always seemed dark.” Sara glanced at Adelaide and noticed the baby’s eyes were closed. “Oh, no, Adelaide is falling asleep. Help me keep her awake so she’ll sleep through the night.” Sara thought a minute, then began to sing. “Two little blackbirds sitting on a hill. One named Jack. One named Jill.” She wiggled her finger on the handle of the stroller. “Fly away Jack. Fly away Jill. Now your turn,” she said.
Sam gave her a blank look.
“Surely you’ve played this game before. It’s been around forever.”
Sam shrugged.
“Two little blackbirds sitting in the snow. One named Fast. One named—” She broke off and waited and waited. And waited. “One named Fast. One named Ssss—”
“Snake?” he said. Sara smiled.
“One named Fast. One named Slow,” she said and continued the rhyme. “Two little blackbirds soaring in the sky. One named Low. One named?” She glanced at him expectantly. “It needs to rhyme with sky.”
“High,” he finally said, and Sara spotted a twinge of triumph in his eyes.
“High,” she said. “Say it louder so we keep Adelaide awake.”
Sam yelled the word and Adelaide gave a start, blinking her eyes. “Good job. Two little blackbirds...”
They played the game for the rest of the walk. She hadn’t heard Sam speak so much since she’d started working with the family, and although she couldn’t exactly call it conversation, it counted as interaction. She planned to put Adelaide on her tummy on a blanket to get her moving a bit. Hopefully both children would sleep well after the exercise. Princess Bridget had told her that one of the keys to parent and child happiness was to wear out the children, and Sara was taking that child-care tip to heart. Trouble was she wondered if she would last through the evening herself.
In fact, after she washed her face and brushed her teeth, she took a book with her to her room and fell asleep midpage. She awakened in the middle of the night, her book resting on her chest and the light from the lamp making her squint her eyes. Reaching for the cup of water she liked to keep on the bedside table, she realized she’d forgotten to bring a cup last night.
Not wanting to awaken Sam by going into the adjoining bathroom, she tiptoed from her room and down the dark hallway. She poured herself a cup of water and drank most of it, then turned off the light at the kitchen sink and slowly made her way down the hall.
She bumped into something that wasn’t a wall. Panic rushed through her. A squeak escaped her throat and she nearly dropped her cup.
“It’s me,” Gavin said before he swore under his breath, probably from the water she spilled on him. “What?
“I am carrying a cup of water,” she said, trying to catch her breath, caught in an unexpected swirl of emotions and sensations. He felt so strong and sure against her. He was holding her to keep her from falling. She couldn’t remember the last time someone had held her other than her family. “You startled me.”
“I heard a noise and thought it might be Sam,” he said, still holding her in his arms.
She felt so safe. His strength vibrated throughout her. Clinging to him, she felt a surprising mix of awareness and emotion thrum through her.
Still struggling for balance, she leaned against him. She inhaled his scent and nearly fell. “Sorry,” she managed. “I didn’t mean to pour water on you.”
“Could be worse,” he said, still holding her.
Sara wanted him to keep holding her. She wanted this feeling never to end. Where were these thoughts coming from?
“Yes,” she said. She still clung to him, soaking him up.
The moment stretched between them. “You okay?” he finally asked her.
“Yes,” she said reluctantly.
“You sure?”
She took another deep breath and inhaled his scent again. “Yes,” she whispered.
He gradually stepped away from her, releasing her from his embrace.
In the darkness, she was caught off guard by the strange stirring in her stomach. Was this desire? “I’ll go back to bed,” she managed.
“What about your water?” he asked.
“I’ll be fine,” she said, and forced herself to back away from him as much as she could when she really wanted to stay close to him.
“Good night, then,” he said in a husky masculine voice that raced through her bloodstream.
Why was he affecting her this way?
“Good night,” she said and stumbled to her bedroom. Her heart pounded in her chest. She felt something she hadn’t felt in a long time.
Sara didn’t know what to do with the strange sensation. She’d pushed her wants aside for too long. Sara sank onto her bed and closed her eyes. The room spun. This wasn’t at all convenient. Perhaps it was all an aberration and would disappear in the morning. She couldn’t want the father of the children she was caring for. It just wouldn’t work.
Taking several deep breaths, she wished she could also drink some water to calm herself. Instead, she took more deep breaths, telling herself that she wasn’t attracted to Gavin. She absolutely could not and did not want him.
Her heart still racing, Sara counted backward from three hundred and prayed she would fall asleep before she reached one.
* * *
During the next few days, she avoided Gavin as much as she could, which was difficult due to the small size of the cottage. Despite her best efforts, he brushed against her or she bumped against him. Each time it happened, she felt as if she had received an electrical shock. She felt increasingly aware of his body. Bloody inconvenient. When she crawled into bed at night, she should have been exhausted, and she was. When she closed her eyes, however, crazy images filled her mind. What would it be like to be held in his strong arms? What if, for once, she could let down her guard and relish the protectiveness of a man? She wondered what his mouth would feel like if he kissed her.
Sara groaned and frowned at herself. Stop it. At the same time her contrary mind nudged her. Could she even remember the last time she’d been kissed?
Nine days after she’d started her position, she put Adelaide to bed and went to the kitchen to get her cup of water. She didn’t want to make the mistake of running into Gavin again in the dark. Just as she left the kitchen, he approached her.