Expecting a Christmas Miracle

“Come on, Ben,” Seth said, interrupting them. “Let’s go and visit Alyssa, shall we?”

Jadon told himself he was overreacting to Seth’s abruptness, but the way Kylie dodged his gaze only confirmed it wasn’t his imagination. With a flash of annoyance he tried not to obsess about how he didn’t even know Kylie on a personal level—she hadn’t been here in Cedar Bluff when he’d left—so there was no reason for her to carry a grudge against him. She’d obviously picked up on Seth’s disdain.

Part of their attitude might be because they were afraid he’d leave Alyssa again, he acknowledged.

But even more, he suspected Seth didn’t think he was good enough for Alyssa. A fact he couldn’t argue.

Even aside from the problem of sustaining a relationship, what did he know about being a father? Or having a normal family? Nothing. His family had been anything but normal.

He stood where he was, watching them make their way down the hall to Alyssa’s room, a closely knit family unit, regardless of the lack of formality of marriage. Clearly they were good friends with Alyssa.

Maybe this wasn’t a good time to visit after all. His presence in the room with Seth, Kylie and Ben would only make things awkward.

Coward, his subconscious jeered.

With a muttered oath he continued down the hall to Alyssa’s room. He stood in the doorway, watching her smile and laugh while hugging Ben.

He swallowed the hard lump in his throat and stepped farther in the room.

When Alyssa saw him, the light in her eyes dimmed. “Hi, Jadon.”

“How are you feeling?” he asked, avoiding Seth’s none-too-subtle glare. “You look much better this morning.”

“I am better,” Alyssa said. “Dr. Rayborn has written my discharge notice. I’m free to go home.”

“That’s wonderful news.” He was very glad to realize that Alyssa was stable enough to go home. At least he didn’t have to worry about the twins being born too prematurely.

“I have to stay on bed rest for a few days,” Alyssa explained, including all of them in her earnest gaze. “But Dr. Rayborn told me to come back to see her on Wednesday. If all goes well, I might be able to return to work after that.”

He bit back a protest, knowing his opinion on her working this late in her pregnancy wouldn’t be welcome. He wanted to reassure her about how he planned to help her to financially support the babies but at the same time he didn’t want to invite an argument, especially in front of Seth and Kylie.

“Don’t rush things,” Kylie warned, and he wanted to kiss her in gratitude for saying exactly what he was thinking. “Remember, stay healthy so you can carry those babies to term.”

“I know. I’ve already heard the same lecture from Dr. Rayborn,” Alyssa protested, holding up a hand with a wry smile. “I won’t rush things, but you know as well as I do that the longer I work before the delivery, the more time I can take off after the twins are born.”

Again, Jadon had to bite his tongue to keep from interrupting. If he had his way, Alyssa wouldn’t have to work for a long time after the twins were born. He might not know much about being a father, but he refused to let her struggle to make ends meet either.

Yet he understood they had a long way to go before she’d lean on him. So he’d be patient, taking one day at a time.

“Do you need a ride home?” Seth asked. “We’re happy to stop by your place since Ben’s officially discharged, too.”

“That would be great,” Alyssa said gratefully. “The nurses have already done the discharge teaching. All I need is a prescription for the oral terbutaline Dr. Rayborn wants me to continue taking and I’ll be ready to go.”

Jadon frowned, thinking her condition didn’t sound too stable to him. “I can give you a ride home, Alyssa. That way Kylie and Seth don’t have to wait.”

Seth flashed a grim smile, crossed his arms over his chest. “Oh, it’s no bother. We don’t mind waiting, do we, Kylie? And besides, you worked graveyard last night, didn’t you? I heard the ED was crazy. Might be better for you to hurry home and get some sleep. You look exhausted.”

The dismissive note in Seth’s tone put Jadon’s teeth on edge. Silently, Jadon glanced at Alyssa, giving her the final word. She hesitated, and then grimaced as she nodded. “Jadon, I didn’t realize you’ve just finished working the night shift. I’ll go home with Kylie and Seth. You do look like you could use some sleep.”

Her choice to go with her friends, rather than with him, stung. Maybe he’d made mistakes but, dammit, it wasn’t all his fault. He hadn’t left knowing Alyssa was pregnant.

When the nurse didn’t immediately return with Alyssa’s prescription, he knew he’d lost the battle. Swallowing a heavy sigh, he turned and left, trying to be happy that Alyssa was doing well enough to go home.

But if she thought she could avoid him forever, she was wrong. Maybe he did need some sleep, but he and Alyssa needed to talk. Soon.

Preferably without an audience.

Alyssa sat on her sofa, staring morosely at her crooked Charlie Brown Christmas tree standing in the livingroom corner of her apartment. She’d thought the ornaments would help fill in the sparse gaps between the branches, but instead the branches slumped beneath the weight of even her smallest ornaments.

Her apartment manager, Mr. Worthington, had brought her the tree and hauled her ornament boxes out of her storage bin located in the basement. Mr. Worthington was a sweet man; he’d been a devoted fan ever since the night he’d had crushing chest pain and she’d stayed by his side during the ambulance ride to the hospital.

So she couldn’t complain about the tree. Instead, she should be glad she had at least something Christmassy to look at. Christmas had always been her favorite holiday even while she’d been growing up. It had been the one time of the year when her mother had gone all out, lots of decorations and celebrating to make their time together special. In recent years, though, since her mother had passed away, the holiday spirit had been more difficult to find. Now, with the babies coming, she’d grown excited about Christmas again.

However, bed rest did not include putting up Christmas decorations, or baking Christmas cookies. Heck, she couldn’t even scrub the floors or really do anything to relieve the boredom of her apartment.

When the doorbell buzzed, indicating she had a visitor, she crossed over to the intercom system, expecting her coworker from the ED. “Susan? Is that you?”

“No. It’s Jadon.”

Alyssa closed her eyes and momentarily rested her forehead on the wall. She’d known Jadon wouldn’t leave her alone for long, especially after she’d turned down a ride with him earlier that morning. She’d seen the flash of hurt in his eyes when she’d agreed to go home with Seth. She’d felt guilty.

But she wasn’t any more ready to continue their discussion now than she had been earlier in the day.

Since avoiding him hadn’t worked, she pushed the button to release the door lock of the apartment. In moments he knocked on her door.

She ran her fingers through her hair and opened it, all too aware of how awful she looked wearing maternity sweats. Not that she should care.

But she did.

“Alyssa, are you supposed to be up off the sofa?” he asked, his brow furrowed with concern as he shut the door behind him.

She suppressed a sigh, telling herself it was natural he was worried about the babies. They were his babies, too.

“Yes, I can make simple meals for myself, walk to the bathroom and back. I’m to keep a log of any contractions I have and to call Dr. Rayborn if they become at all regular or sustained.”

Jadon nodded and thrust his hands deep into his pockets. “I’m glad. Kim seems like a great doctor.”

“Yes, she is.” Alyssa made her way back to the sofa. “Help yourself if you want something to drink.”

“I’m fine.” Jadon followed her into the living room, taking a seat on the chair across from her. If he noticed her pathetic little Christmas tree, he didn’t say anything. “Alyssa, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have left all those months ago without saying anything. Give me a chance to explain.”

She swallowed hard and shook her head. “Jadon, if this story involves some other woman, like an ex-wife, a fiancée or a girlfriend, I really don’t want to hear the gory details.”

“What?” His startled expression would have been comical if she hadn’t felt so sick to her stomach to be having this confrontation. “Is that really what you think? That I left you for some other woman?”

She rubbed a hand over her stomach, hoping she could calm the babies, sheltering them from her tension. “What was I supposed to think? Why else would you leave without a word?”

“There isn’t another woman, Alyssa. Not now, or during the time we were together.” His low tone and the seriousness in his gaze made it difficult to doubt him. “But you’re right, I haven’t been entirely truthful with you. About my past.”

She licked suddenly dry lips, suspecting she wasn’t going to like this. “To be fair, Jadon, neither one of us talked much about our pasts.” Their physical attraction had overridden most of the normal let’s-get-to-know-each-other small talk.

“Alyssa, I left Cedar Bluff a few months ago because of a family crisis.”

“A family crisis? One of your parents?” she asked in concern, remembering the few sketchy details they’d shared about their backgrounds.

Slowly he shook his head, letting out a heavy sigh. “They’re fine, well, sort of, but that wasn’t the problem. It was my brother who needed help. I know this isn’t fair, but I’d rather not go into all the details right now because it’s complicated.”

“Complicated,” she repeated, trying not to feel hurt. She tried to tell herself that whatever had happened wasn’t her business, but it was difficult. “I guess I can understand.” Even though she really didn’t. Then again, she shouldn’t be surprised. Jadon had always tried to keep his distance from her emotionally. This was just another example.

“I’ll tell you the entire story sometime, but right now I’m more worried about you. And the babies.”

“There isn’t anything to be worried about. I’m fine and so are the twins.” She gave a small shrug, hiding her true feelings. Jadon had never confided in her before, and obviously he didn’t see a reason to start now. Maybe he hadn’t left her for another woman, but that didn’t change the fact that he wasn’t open to a future. “All I can do is follow doctor’s orders and hope for the best.”

“Yes. But I’d really like to help.”

“Help?” she repeated, trying to figure out where he was going with this. “Like with what? The babies haven’t been born yet.”

“Do you have everything you need?” he asked. “It’s going to be rough as you need two of everything. So what about cribs? Car seats? Strollers?”

The thought of Jadon buying baby things almost made her smile. “Seth and Kylie threw me a shower, inviting all the ED staff, so I have most of what I need, thanks.”

He swept a skeptical glance over her apartment. “You’ll be crowded in here, don’t you think?”

She raised a brow. “For now maybe we’ll be a little cramped. But I won’t be living here forever.” At least, that was her plan. She had some small savings that she hoped to use as a down payment for a house, depending on how things went after the twins were born. If she could work enough hours to afford a small mortgage.

“Alyssa, I have a three-bedroom house. There’s no reason you can’t move in with me for the rest of your pregnancy and then even after the babies are born. Between the two of us, we should be able to help care for the twins, keeping our child-care costs down.”

Her eyes widened in shock. Was he crazy? Was he really suggesting they live together for financial reasons? As if the babies were nothing more than a business arrangement? “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

In fact, she was pretty sure it was a really bad idea. His emotions may not be involved, but hers would be.

“Please, think about it.” He didn’t back down as she half expected he might, but stood awkwardly in her living room, looking like a fish out of water. “I know things have been rough for you, and I’m sorry you had to go through this alone. But right now we need to focus on the babies. Having you move in with me, even temporarily, is best for them.”

CHAPTER FOUR

LONG after Jadon had left, Alyssa found herself replaying their brief conversation over and over again.

He’d asked her to move in with him. As a business arrangement. Because there was extra room in his threebedroom house. A temporary solution to solve her child-care needs.

Typical of Jadon to gloss over the emotional side of things. Did he ever think about their time together? Did he have any feelings for her at all? Other than as the mother of his children? Children he’d never planned on having?

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