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Rescued by the Magic Of Christmas
“I haven’t met anyone I’ve wanted to marry….”
Except Iain.
Though Jake wondered how marriage to an adventurous, full-time climber would have been for Carly. Still, the fact she hadn’t seemed to have gotten over Iain’s death made Jake feel guilty. Okay, guiltier.
“But you could.” He wouldn’t be happy until she moved on with her life the way Hannah had. Carly deserved a happy ending, too. Jake would somehow make sure she found one. He owed her that much.
“I could.” Carly didn’t sound that confident as she opened her suitcase.
Jake didn’t blame her. He hadn’t known what to make of Iain the first time he’d met him. The kid’s confidence bordered on cockiness, but Jake had soon learned the talented climber had a heart of gold. He couldn’t help but like and respect Iain. Envy him, too. For his fearlessness. For his climbing talent. For being the recipient of Carly’s love and adoration.
At least until finding Iain’s bloody, bruised and broken body covered in snow. The image had given Jake nightmares for years. He blinked, hoping to erase the picture in his mind. “You really should.”
Another shrug. “Do we need to check on the kids?”
He listened to the sound of voices drifting upward. “Nope. I hear them.”
“I thought it was good when kids were quiet.”
“Noise is good,” Jake said. “Quiet means start worrying, but I can hear them. We’ll help them with their homework later.”
“What about you?” Carly asked.
“My homework days are long past.”
“That’s not what I’m talking about.” She picked up a black camisole from her suitcase and threw it at him. The same way she’d tossed a dishrag or a sweatshirt at him years ago.
He caught it as he always had. “Nice throw.”
But the action felt too intimate to Jake in a way it never felt before. This was the kind of top a man peeled off a woman.
Pink tinged her cheeks. “Sorry, habit.”
“It’s okay.” Jake handed her the top rather than tossing it back to her. “What did you want to know?”
“Have you given marriage much thought?” she asked.
He was hoping she wouldn’t go there, but maybe after coming home to face her demons—and the devil kids downstairs—she deserved the truth. It wasn’t as if the information would change anything between them. “I was engaged, but other than that…”
Her gaze met his. “Nobody told me. You never told me.”
He shrugged. “It was four…no, five years ago.”
“So what happened?”
His jaw tensed. “I don’t want to talk about it. I barely remember it.”
He’d wanted to forget. While Hannah and Carly had been holding themselves together, he’d been falling apart.
“Come on. Tell me,” she urged. “Did you kiss her and then have to get married?”
If only it had been that simple.
“Not exactly.” Jake wasn’t proud of what he’d become or done back then. “I was partying too much, met a woman who was nice but totally wrong for me and asked her to marry me. Luckily I realized getting married wasn’t the thing to do at that time in my life so I broke it off.”
And got his out-of-control life back together.
“Do you ever think about settling down now?” Carly asked.
“No. I see no good reason to change the status quo.”
She grinned. “That’s what I say, too.”
Jake found her words hard to believe, even harder to take. Her joy and excitement over her upcoming wedding to Iain seemed a hundred and eighty degrees away from where she was coming from now, and that hurt. She was meant to be a bride.
Someone else’s bride, Jake reminded himself.
He didn’t deserve her.
If he’d been on the mountain six years ago with Iain and Nick, everything would have been…different. Better. Okay. And it was up to Jake to make things right.
For Hannah, Kendall, Austin and…
Carly.
CHAPTER THREE
PATRONS PACKED the bar and dining area of the Wy’East Brewing Company. Carly hadn’t seen so many familiar faces since…
She felt a pang in her heart.
Since Nick’s and Iain’s funerals.
With a sigh, Carly glanced around the lodge-style building. Jacob’s place. She could see the care he’d taken with it, the improvements he’d made to the interior and the menu offerings since taking over after his father retired.
The aromas of beer and grease mingling and wafting in the air reminded her of the brewpub she managed back home. The conversations of customers drowned out the music being piped in through speakers. At least Christmas carols weren’t playing.
Too bad everything else was decked out for the holiday.
A swag decorated with miniature lights, pine cones and holly berries hung around the bar. Wreaths dangled from the vaulted log-beamed ceiling. A twinkling Christmas tree sat in the corner next to a small stage with neatly wrapped packages underneath.
Talk about being dropped in the middle of a nightmare before Christmas…. She shifted in her seat. Since arriving in Portland earlier today, she’d been forced to confront the worst moments of her life over and over again.
“Your adoring crowd awaits,” a glowing and very pregnant Hannah teased.
Carly forced a smile. She didn’t want to leave the comfort of this table, but she couldn’t hide behind her sister-in-law’s family for the next two weeks. Hannah was obviously excited. And Carly wanted her sister-in-law to be happy.
Fortified by a serving of shepherd’s pie and a salad topped with raspberry vinaigrette, she stood. Working her way through the jam-packed restaurant, she received hugs while having the same conversation over and over again.
Yes, she lived in Philadelphia now.
No, she wasn’t married yet.
Yes, it had been a long time.
She missed Iain, too.
Carly could hardly breathe as she spoke. Facing her demons was one thing, but this…She plodded through the way she had six years ago at her brother’s funeral and then at Iain’s, gritting her teeth and smiling. This time, however, the answers got easier to say the fifth time around. They became automatic by the tenth. Progress? Carly hoped so.
She looked around the room once more. She’d expected to see Jacob at some point this evening. This was his brewing company. His pub. Where was he on such a crowded Wednesday night? She brushed aside a twinge of disappointment.
It wasn’t easy to do. If Jacob were here, he would make this not such an ordeal. He would make her feel normal, the way he had at the house, and comfortable.
After what seemed like hours but was really only one, Carly reached the spot where she’d begun. The dinner plates had been cleared from the knotty pine table. A pitcher of beer had joined the kids’ and Hannah’s pitcher of root beer. A slice of half-eaten mud pie and five spoons sat between Hannah and Garrett.
They were sharing. Happy.
There was no reason for Carly to be here.
And no one for her to be with.
She swallowed the pint-size lump in her throat and sat opposite them. “Hey, you lovebirds. Where are the kids?”
“With Jake,” Hannah said.
So he was here after all. “I didn’t notice him.”
“He’s been here the entire time.”
And he hadn’t come over to say hello? At least, not until she left the table.
Ouch.
Carly rested her elbows on the table and supported her chin with her hands. Making the rounds down memory lane had drained her mentally and physically. The last thing she needed to worry about was Jacob Porter.
“Sorry that took so long,” she said. “I can’t believe all the people I know who are here tonight. Most of the local OMSAR members, too.”
“Word’s out you’re back in town.” Garrett looked at Hannah. “Though I can’t imagine who would have told them already.”
“I may have mentioned it to a few people,” said a sheepish Hannah.
“That’s a good one, my beautiful wife.” Garrett laughed. “Since your definition of a few ranges from two to two hundred.”
“I’m sorry,” Hannah said.
Carly bit back a sigh. She didn’t want Hannah to feel bad. Besides, if Carly got all the hard stuff over with her first day in town, she could breeze through the rest of the trip. “Don’t apologize. Now I won’t have to search people out since I saw them all here tonight.”
Hannah tucked her shiny, long, auburn hair behind her ears. “That’s the spirit.”
“She’s being a good sport, my dear.” With a smile, Garrett poured a pint from the pitcher containing a deep, amber-colored beer. He slid the glass in front of Carly. “Here. You earned this.”
“Thanks.” She appreciated Garrett’s thoughtfulness, as well as the way he honored Hannah’s past, making sure Nick’s memory stayed alive with the kids and accepting Carly as a part of their family. “I really need this.”
“Yes, you do.” Hannah’s green eyes danced. “It’s Nick’s Winter Ale.”
Carly should have known. A jumble of emotions ran through, but the biggest one—pride—made her raise her glass. “To Nick.”
“Hear, hear.” Garrett joined in the toast. “To the brewmaster extraordinaire.”
“And Iain,” Hannah added.
Carly took a sip. She wanted to remain impartial, to judge the beer on its own merits, to…
Delicious. Refreshing. Absolutely perfect.
The velvety smooth ale struck a perfect balance between the malt and hops. Full-bodied with a hint of cinnamon. She had never tasted something so yummy. Of course, Carly wouldn’t have expected any less from her big brother.
“Extraordinaire is right.” Her smile couldn’t begin to match the joy in her heart at Nick’s accomplishment. “An awarding-winning winter ale if I ever tasted one.”
Two hands rested on her shoulders. Large hands. Male hands.
Jacob.
No need to turn around and see he was the one standing behind her. She’d recognize the warmth of his touch and his familiar scent anywhere, even in a crammed brewpub with all the noise, sights and smells competing for attention.
He gave a gentle squeeze, but didn’t move his hands away.
The gesture, no doubt meant to be platonic, sent unexpected tingles shooting out from the point of contact. Carly gulped. She hadn’t experienced tingles in…years.
No big deal.
“From your lips to the judges’ scores,” Jacob said.
She glanced up at him. “It’s delicious.”
His gaze met hers. “I’m happy you like it.”
“My new favorite.”
“Mine, too. Especially if it keeps that big smile on your face.”
The way he stared at her, as if she were the only woman in the room, made Carly’s insides clench. Her temperature shot up. She looked away.
“Thanks for putting the beer into production.” She watched a bead of moisture run down her glass. “It means…a lot.”
“I know.”
Carly got the feeling he knew a little too much. She took another swig of her beer, but the liquid did nothing to cool her off or help her relax.
So what if he still had his hands on her shoulders?
No big deal.
He might still be a total hottie, but she wasn’t a schoolgirl with a crush on her brother’s best friend. No reason to freak out.
Jacob removed his hands. Thank goodness. Carly blew out a puff of air.
As he sat on the bench next to her, his thigh brushed hers. More tingles and a burst of heat erupted where he’d touched her. She scooted away. “Where are the kids?”
“In my office playing cards,” he said. “They finished their ice cream sundaes and were still hungry so I gave them cookies.”
Hannah tsked. “You spoil them, Jake.”
“I indulge them,” he countered. “A big difference.”
His easy grin made him look younger and so carefree. Compared to him, Carly felt old and troubled.
Sure, she was home for the first time in years surrounded by family and old friends. Laughter and cheers filled the air, a good time being had by all the smiling faces. But something was missing.
Not something, Carly realized.
Nick and Iain.
She looked across the table at Hannah, resting her head on Garrett’s shoulder. How did she handle this? Not just evenings like this, but every night, every day, raising Nick’s kids in his house, in his hometown where memories lay waiting around every corner.
Somehow Hannah had found the hope and the courage to love again. And had made her peace with the past.
Not Carly.
She had barely made it through dinner tonight.
She stared at her bare hands. There hadn’t been an engagement ring on her finger for years—never a wedding band like Hannah had worn. And yet…
Carly glanced sideways at Jacob, her cheeks warming. She almost felt guilty for being so aware of the man sitting next to her. It seemed strange to be feeling this way, for reacting to his nearness and his touch. This was where Iain had tended bar and she waited tables. Where they would have celebrated their rehearsal dinner had he made it down the mountain.
But he hadn’t made it down. And she hadn’t died up there with him even though it had felt like that at the time.
Losing him and Nick had hurt so bad.
She had wanted only to forget, but perhaps it was time to follow Hannah’s example and remember.
Instead of avoiding the past, Carly could try to embrace it. Maybe then she could finally put the pieces of her heart back together and learn to love…again.
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