Matthew's Choice

“Why didn’t you just flat-out ask?”

Peter flashed a wicked grin. “Let’s see if that will work.” He cleared his throat and leaned toward her. “Miss Carson, I enjoyed dancing with you last night. There’s a nice supper club in Cedar Grove. So what do you say? Dinner and dancing Friday night?”

Why not? Dancing with Peter had been fun, and today had been...different. Just because they went out, didn’t mean she had to give him her heart. It was in too many pieces anyway. She tilted her head toward him. “I would love to.”

“Good.” He motioned to the waiter for another refill on their coffee. “Can I ask you a personal question?”

“You can ask. Don’t know if you’ll get an answer.”

“What did you ever see in Matt Jefferies?”

“I can’t believe you asked me that.”

He shrugged. “I just never understood why you dated him. He wasn’t good enough for you.”

Suddenly Peter’s interest in her became clearer. Allie blotted her mouth with her napkin. A memory from high school. Peter losing a math competition to Matt. Peter telling Matt he’d never be anything but the kid from the wrong side of town. Surely that wasn’t what Peter referred to. But she had to know for sure.

Allie fingered the handle of the porcelain cup, and on cue, the waiter appeared and refilled it with coffee. After he left, she stirred cream into her cup. “You’re not still competing with Matt, are you?”

“Compete with Matt? Of course not. I’m glad to see him doing well. I just always thought you belonged with someone more like me.” He smiled, exposing perfectly even white teeth.

“And not the kid from Beaker Street?”

A red flush started at his neck and ended at his ears. “That was a stupid remark I made a long time ago. I never should’ve said it. I didn’t like that he always beat me in everything. Math, quarterback position, you.”

She eyed him over the cup’s rim.

“Honestly,” he said, “I’ve always regretted saying that.”

What was it she’d always heard about people using the word honestly?

Peter’s cell phone rang, and he slid it from his belt. He frowned. “I can’t believe I’m getting another call from the office. Excuse me.”

He stepped away from the table. When he returned, his face was pinched and the muscle in his jaw twitched.

“That case from last night?” She’d been trying to figure out how to bring up the subject without being too obvious. Now the problem was solved.

“Yeah,” he muttered. “The kid’s run away.”

“Last night you said the child was a nine-year-old boy. He may be in my reading class. Maybe I can help. It’s possible I know the family, or where he might’ve gone.”

“Oh, I know where he’s gone. The hospital to check on his OD’d mother. Sarah at the shelter said that’s all he talked about.”

Protective son, overdosed mother. Don’t let it be— “Is the mother’s name Mariah Connors?”

He stared at her. “How do you know Mariah Connors?”

She swallowed the bile that rose up her throat. Poor Noah. “I’ve counseled the boy, had parent-teacher meetings with Mariah, so I know the situation. She’s Matt Jefferies’s sister.”

* * *

MATT TOOK ONE last look at the diamond engagement ring and closed the box. He’d locked the wedding band away in his wall safe until the wedding. Wedding. He liked the sound of the word.

A tiny flicker of regret pierced his memory. He’d asked Allie to marry him once, and she’d turned him down. Looking back, it was probably for the best. Allie never approved of his bold plans to get ahead, and she wouldn’t fit into his present lifestyle. Besides, she was his past. Jessica was his future. A future that was within his grasp, one he had worked hard to get. Jessica wanted the same things he did. But it was more than wanting the same things. She was kind and caring.

His heart tendered at a memory of Jessica in the park last summer. She’d set up her easel at the Memphis Zoo to sketch the snow leopards, and a small girl had wanted to “help.” Without hesitation, Jessica flipped to a new sheet in her sketch pad and spent the next fifteen minutes letting the child try her hand at drawing.

The kitten mewed, and he glanced at the cardboard box. The kitten had surprised him when he returned home with it, lapping milk from a bowl. It mewed again. “Shh,” he said as he knelt by the box. “You need to be quiet. Jessica will be here soon and if she hears you, she’ll want to hold you and that will make her sneeze. Are you hungry?”

Matt had cleaned the closed eye, and now the kitten stared at him with two good eyes. It mewed again, and he frowned. He’d barely gotten a little more milk poured when the doorbell rang. He settled it gently on an old T-shirt in a corner of the box. “Be quiet,” he said and closed the door to his bedroom.

“Happy New Year, love.” Jessica swept into the room and wrapped her arms around his neck.

He tilted her face toward him and gently kissed her as the strains of “Clair de Lune” played softly in the background. Matt kissed her again, and she leaned into him, returning his kiss. “Happy New Year to you, too,” he said when they broke apart. “Are you hungry?”

“Hmm, I don’t know. This is nice.” Her stomach growled, and she giggled. “I guess that ruined the mood.”

“Right this way, m’lady.”

“What’s this?” She shifted her gaze from the table set with his best china and back to Matt.

“Just setting the mood,” he replied. “You look great, as usual.”

And she did, in boots and black leggings and a short, hunter-green dress that brought out the green in her hazel eyes.

“You’re not so bad yourself.” She stroked the red cashmere sweater he wore, a Christmas gift from her. “So, what have you made me?”

He pulled out her chair. “Eggs Benedict—I just have to cook the eggs, but we’ll start off with fruit, and caramel coffee.”

An hour later, Matt refreshed their cups. Everything had gone off without a hitch, even the eggs. Jessica smiled.

“Thank you, Matthew. I don’t know when I’ve ever had a better New Year’s celebration. Last night and now this morning.”

His heart thumped faster as he looked into her eyes. The velvet box was in his pocket, waiting for him to bring out at the right moment. He took her hand. “Jessica, we’ve talked about marriage before, and you know how much I—”

A yowl from his bedroom made him flinch.

“What was that?” She looked over his shoulder toward the bedroom.

The kitten. Not mewing, but sounding exactly like it had in the parking lot. Loud. Pitiful. It was a noise that could not be ignored. “Uh...”

“Matthew, do I hear a cat?” She cocked her head. “It is. But...but you know I’m allergic.”

“I know. It’s a kitten, and I thought I ran over it. You stay here while I go check—”

The doorbell rang, and rang again. And again.

“I’ll get the door.” Jessica pointed toward the bedroom. “You see about that poor kitty.”

The kitten howled again, and Matt huffed a sigh. It probably needed milk again, and he grabbed the carton. “Be right back. Entertain whoever it is.”

The kitten stared plaintively at him when he opened the door and immediately hushed its crying. He picked up the bowl and refilled it. Voices came from the other room. Women’s voices. Matt placed the bowl beside the kitten and guided it to the milk. “You’re on your own, kiddo,” he said and went to wash his hands.

Then he stepped into the living room and stopped. “Allie?”

Jessica’s gaze went from Allie to him. “You didn’t tell me Clint’s sister was stopping by.”

Something was wrong. Bad wrong. It was stamped in the way Allie stood, in the slump of her shoulders, in her face. “What’s going on?”

“Matt, I don’t know how to tell you... Mariah is in the hospital. Your sister may not make it. And her son has run away from the shelter.”

He didn’t know why he felt so surprised.

“Sister?” Jessica turned to him. “You never said anything about a sister.”

“Everybody, just sit down.” He sank into the hard leather chair closest to him and looked at Allie. “What happened?”

“I’m not sure. All I know is she overdosed on heroin and her little boy has run away from the person who was looking after him temporarily,” Allie said. “You’ll have to ask Peter Elliott exactly what happened.”

He missed whatever she said next. Peter Elliott? He was taken aback the great man hadn’t already called to rub Matt’s nose in the news. Mariah. What have you done? His sister might be two years older, but he’d always taken care of her until she ran off with that Connors thug. He realized Allie had asked him something. “I’m sorry, I didn’t—”

“I have the hospital number, if you want it.” She held a slip of paper out toward him.

Matt folded his arms across his chest. “I don’t know what you expect me to do. I tried to talk to Mariah when she first started using—after Connors introduced her to drugs. She didn’t listen then, and I doubt that anything has changed. I’m sorry, but she made her choice a long time ago.”

And he had made his when he left Cedar Grove. He just never thought his past would choose today to catch up with him.

CHAPTER FOUR

NOAH WAITED FOR an opportunity to slip into the hospital entrance unnoticed. By now, the cops were sure to be looking for him, and they’d probably figure out where he’d gone. A man and woman with four boys walked toward the door. Maybe no one would notice if he tagged along. Noah fell in behind them, staying just close enough, but not so close the man or woman would notice him.

Noah almost bumped into the last boy when the man stopped and turned around.

“’Scuse me,” Noah mumbled and bent over to untie his shoe and retie it.

The man clapped his hands once. “Okay, boys, listen up. We’re going down this hall to the ICU waiting room. I want you to be quiet. There’s folks here that have really sick people in the hospital. You mind your manners now, you hear?”

Noah couldn’t believe his luck. As soon as they started walking, he stood and tagged along. Once in the waiting room, he glanced around. Adults sat in little groups, but there was one area where kids watched cartoons on a wall TV. An empty chair next to a girl about his age beckoned to him. He sauntered over and sat in the vinyl wingback like he owned it. After a few minutes, he braved a glance around. People seemed to be lining up toward the silver double doors. “Where’s everybody going?” he muttered under his breath.

“It’s almost visiting time. But you’re not old enough to go back.”

Noah whipped his head around. He hadn’t meant anyone to hear him. The girl never looked up from her book. “What do you know about how old I am?”

“Puh-leese.” She eyed him over the book. “We’re both in Miss Allie’s reading class. Hello?”

Heat crawled up his neck and spread to the tip of his ears. Ashley...something or other. She always knew the answer to everything, and she never stumbled over her words. Noah dug his fingers into the hard vinyl. Maybe if he squeezed his eyes hard enough, when he opened them she’d be gone. Nope, she was still there.

She stared at him. “What are you doing? You look like you’re going to be sick or something. Why are you here?”

“What’re you doin’ here?” he snapped.

“My granna’s real sick.”

Oh. He never had a grandmother. “Do you get to go back there to see her?”

“Of course, but with my mother.”

She tilted her head up in that superior way girls had, and he quit feeling sorry for her. “Well, when those doors open, I’m going through ’em.”

“They’ll just make you come back if you don’t have an adult with you.”

He crossed his arms. “No, they won’t.”

She gave him a sour look and picked up her book again. “Whatever. But you’ll see.”

Noah spied the man he’d walked in with standing in line. He had one of the boys with him. “See ya,” he said and nonchalantly strolled over to the boy. If Ashley told on him, he’d... He fisted his hands. She just better not.

The doors opened with a soft swish, and people streamed through them and down a hallway with glass enclosures. His heart pounded against his chest until he thought it’d pop out. He didn’t see his mom in any of the first rooms. What if she’d died?

Then he noticed each room had a name on the door, and he kept walking even though his legs had turned to spaghetti, peering at each name. Mariah Connors. He inched inside the room and approached the person in the bed. Black hair fanned across the pillow, just like his mom’s, but this couldn’t be her. This person had tubes and wires everywhere. And her face was so big. Then he spied the little black mole next to her lips. “Mom?”

He touched her hand that lay elevated on a pillow. “Mom. Wake up.”

The rhythmic hissing in the room and the steady beep, beep, beep over her head answered him. He blinked back the tears that threatened to flood his eyes. “Mom, please.”

“I figured I’d find you here.”

Noah recognized the cop’s voice and whirled around to face him. Jason didn’t look too happy.

Suddenly, the beeping increased and just as fast it stopped. One long beep scraped against his eardrums. Alarms went off. Jason grabbed him up and carried him into the hall as nurses swarmed the room.

“Mommm!”

* * *

ALLIE’S HEART PLUMMETED. Who was this person Matt had turned himself into? The man she had loved would never turn his back on his family. But that was the reason they broke up. He’d been so bent on shedding everything about his life in Cedar Grove, including his values, that she couldn’t bear to watch.

He just proved she’d made the right choice, and now every second in his presence picked at the scab on her heart, reminding Allie that the Matt she’d known was truly gone. Why had she even bothered? She should have just let Peter handle the whole matter.

For the first time, Allie noticed the closed blinds, the fancy dishes on the dining room table. We’re kind of talking about getting married. Uh-oh. Heat crawled up her spine and across her face. Could the floor just open and swallow her right now? “I’m sorry—”

“Matthew...” Jessica’s soft voice held a touch of steel. “Would you please explain about this sister you never told me about? And why you don’t want to help her?”

Allie stared at him. Yeah, Matthew, why didn’t you tell this woman you’re about to propose to that you had a sister? Exactly what kind of relationship did they have?

A wince flitted across Matt’s face. He sat a little straighter and rubbed his hands on his thighs. “She’s not anyone you would want to know. She hasn’t made the best decisions in life, and I rarely hear from her...I didn’t even know she had a son until Allie told me last night.”

Conflicting emotions crossed Jessica’s face. Allie sensed Matt’s fiancée was not happy. “Look, I’m kind of in the way here, and I need to get on the road home. Mariah is at Cedar Grove Memorial, if you change your mind.”

“Would you leave the number, as well?” Jessica’s gaze was on Matt.

Allie laid the paper on the coffee table. “Nice seeing you again, Jessica. Matt, I’ll see myself out.”

In the elevator, Allie hugged her jacket closer. Matt hadn’t even tried to stop her. If she never saw him again, it’d be too soon. She’d rather walk through a pasture full of cow pies. Be easier. At least in the pasture, she only had to watch where she stepped. She couldn’t wait to get away from Memphis.

As soon as Allie left the Memphis city limits and traffic behind, she voice-dialed the shelter’s director. For the past year, Allie had volunteered at the children’s shelter, helping several of the kids with their reading and writing skills. Friendship with Sarah had been a bonus. When she answered, Sarah sounded close to tears. “What’s wrong?” Allie asked.

“It’s this boy Jason brought in last—”

“Noah Connors? Has he been found?”

“You know?”

“Yes. Is he hurt?”

“No, he’s okay. I don’t know how the boy did it, but he made it to the hospital where his mom is. Jason found Noah in her room just about the time everything went bad. She stopped breathing, her heart stopped. Jason said it was terrible.”

Allie swallowed. “Did she...”

“No, she didn’t die. Well, she did, but they brought her back.”

“Where’s Noah now?”

“My helper, Brittany, is with him at the hospital. When Jason told me what happened, I just couldn’t make him leave until she got better.”

“I’m an hour away from Cedar Grove. I’ll stop at the hospital and check on him.”

“Does he have any other family?”

Allie hesitated. “His uncle is aware of the situation.”

“Oh, good. That boy needs family around him.”

Allie agreed. She ended the call and pulled over to the side of the road. Matt wouldn’t listen to her, and she didn’t have his phone number, anyway. Maybe he’d listen to her brother. She dialed Clint’s number.

Her brother answered on the second ring. “What’s up?”

“I need you to call Matt.” Allie explained about Mariah and Noah.

“The poor kid.” Clint’s concern came through the phone. “I’ll call Matt and see to it he gets his priorities in order.”

She wished him luck and ended the call. If she pushed it, she’d make the hospital in forty-five minutes.

* * *

WHEN ALLIE ROUNDED the corner to the ICU waiting room, she spied Noah huddled in a chair with his eyes closed. He reminded her of a fledgling bird that’d fallen out of the nest. She nodded to Brittany in the next chair, and then knelt beside him.

“Miss Allie.” He rubbed his eyes.

She brushed his blond hair back. “Are you doing okay?”

His chin quivered, but he nodded. “My mom. They won’t let me see her.”

“Maybe when she feels a little better...”

“But what if she doesn’t get better?” he whispered, his blue eyes round.

Allie gulped. Why couldn’t there be easy answers? Right now she could just about wring Mariah’s neck for putting her son through this hurt. “Let’s don’t cross that bridge just yet.” She squeezed his hand. “Let me see what I can find out.”

At the desk, she identified herself and asked the receptionist about Mariah’s condition.

“Are you family?”

“No. I’m a friend of the family.” Allie leaned in closer so she could see the woman’s name tag. “But, Melanie, I’m asking for a little boy who desperately needs to know how his mother is doing.”

Melanie eyed her, then her gaze slid past Allie toward the waiting room. “We have to ask,” she said. Her mouth quirked down into a frown. “Let me call her nurse.”

A minute later she nodded. “She’s stabilized, and they’ve given her something to keep her knocked out for a while.”

“Can I take him back, just so he can see that she’s okay?”

The receptionist hesitated, visibly tensing.

“If you were in his mom’s shape, wouldn’t you want your child to know you were okay?”

Melanie’s shoulders relaxed, and she nodded. “But you can only stay a few minutes.”

Allie walked back to where Noah sat. “They said I could take you to see her. But, remember, she’s sleeping—we can only stay a few minutes.”

His eyes widened. “Really?”

“Really.” He hopped from the chair and took her hand.

“Wait a minute.” Noah grabbed a piece of paper. “I wrote her a letter. Can I take it back?”

“I don’t see why not.” She turned to Brittany. “I can take over from here. I’ll get him back to the shelter.”

“Will that be all right with Miss Sarah?” Brittany asked.

“I’m sure it will be. I’m a certified volunteer at the shelter, and I’ve taken the children on field trips. You can call and check with her while we visit his mother.”

The double doors opened to let them through. When they reached Mariah’s cubicle, Noah pulled at her hand. “Come on, they might change their minds.”

Allie let him pull her inside the room. She hadn’t expected Mariah to look so...corpselike. Noah dropped her hand and approached the bed as a monitor beeped an irregular rhythm. Allie didn’t even recognize the woman lying in the hospital bed. Mariah lay unmoving, her bloated face as white as the sheet covering her.

“Mom,” Noah said softly. He patted her distended hand. “I’m here.”

The beeping sped up. Allie stepped toward him. “Noah, we can’t stay.”

He blinked fast, his eyes shiny. “Not yet.” He turned back to his mom. “Please, Mom. Wake up.”

A nurse appeared at the door. “You have to leave.”

“No!” His desperate cry squeezed Allie’s heart. “She’ll get better if I talk to her.”

As if on cue, Mariah’s heart rate slowed to an even tempo. The nurse glanced at the monitor then back at Noah. “Five minutes,” she said. Then she gave him a gentle smile. “She needs to rest.”

“I think he’ll be ready then,” Allie said.

Noah patted Mariah’s arm. “Mom, you’ve got to get better.” He licked his lips. “You didn’t finish teaching me how to dance.”

As the boy talked to his mom, the back of Allie’s throat ached. She dug in her jeans for a tissue and, not finding one, used the back of her hand to blot her eyes. The wall clock ticked the minutes by while she leaned against the wall and let her gaze travel around the room. On a white board, someone had written, Good morning. I’m Becky and I’ll be your nurse today. That solved the question of who the nurse was. She glanced through the glass partition at the nurses’ station. Becky tapped her watch, and Allie nodded. She turned to Noah. He’d found a wet cloth and wiped Mariah’s forehead with it. How many times had he done that in the past?

“Noah.” Her voice cracked. She pressed her lips together and took a breath and blew it out. “We have to go.”

“Just one more minute.”

“The nurse wants her to rest. Come on,” she urged softly. “We’ll come back.”

He reached on his tiptoes and kissed his mother’s pasty cheek, then ducked his head as he walked toward Allie.

She reached to take his hand, but he stopped short. “Wait! I didn’t give her my letter.” Noah slipped the paper from his pants pocket and folded it until it was small enough to tuck into Mariah’s closed hand.

At the nurses’ desk, Allie fished one of her business cards from her purse and gave it to Becky. “Would you call me if there’s any change?”

“I’ll put this with her chart,” the nurse replied.

“And thanks for letting us stay longer than five minutes.”

“I think your visit may do more good than all the medicine.”

Noah flipped his bangs out of his eyes. “Will you read my note to her when she wakes up?”

Becky leaned over the desk. “I will, honey. Your mama’s going to be all right. She’s got some mighty fine doctors.”

Don’t tell him that. You don’t know for sure. Allie bit the words back. The nurse meant well, but what if Mariah didn’t make it?

Back in the waiting area, Allie called Sarah and gave her an update on Mariah. “The regular visiting time is at three. I’ll bring him back to the shelter after that, unless something comes up. If it does, I’ll call you.”

Noah glanced up at her after she’d disconnected. “Do I have to go back?”

“You don’t like it there?”

He shrugged. “Miss Sarah’s nice. And Logan’s okay. Lucas is a pain....”

“But?”

He shrank back into the chair and lifted his thin shoulder in a timid gesture. “Have you ever stayed in a place like the shelter before?”

Noah glanced toward the exit sign. She cupped his chin and turned his face back to her. “Where was it, Noah?”

He licked his lips. “In another state. Before we came to Cedar Grove. Mom was...sick, and this woman came and took me to this house.”

“What happened?” She forced out the question, not sure she wanted to hear the answer.

“I ran away.”

* * *

AFTER THE DOOR closed behind Allie, Matt pressed his fingers against his eyelids, then slid his hands to the side of his head and massaged his temples. If New Year’s Day was any indication of how the rest of his year would be...he didn’t want to go there.