Suspect Lover

“Encrypton provides encryption software. We’re not one of the bigger names out there but we’re growing. Thankfully there is a tremendous demand. Government regulations require that much of the data being transferred over the Internet be secured. We secure it.”

“How?” she pressed.

“Generally speaking, the data goes into a box, the box is locked, then transmitted over the Internet. Someone on the other end has a key that opens the box. We make both the box and the key. Specifically I couldn’t tell you how the code works. That’s Denny’s department. I mentioned him, didn’t I?”

“He’s your partner.”

“One of them, yes. Steven is the other. Denny and I…got together about twelve years ago. He had the idea for the program and I had a talent for business. Steven joined the company later, but recently took on the role of partner. He is our financial man. We’re bidding on a large government contract and he’s making sure we’re in a position to do the work if we get it.”

“I see.”

Dominic poured her another glass of wine and prayed he wasn’t boring her to death. She didn’t seem bored, though. She seemed interested. “Ironically, I’ve been traveling to your side of the country lately. You said you were close to D.C?”

“Relatively. I live in Leesburg, Virginia. How does one go about winning a large government contract?”

“The biggest concern is stability. The government has to believe we can deliver. Second is getting the job done within the budget. I’ve been lucky to have some inside help. A former…employee of mine works for the FBI. Having dealt with the government for years, she’s been giving me advice on how to speak their language.”

Caroline’s lips twitched at the edges. “You stumbled over the word employee.”

“Did I?”

“If she was a girlfriend, you don’t have to hide your former lovers from me, Dominic.”

Dominic frowned. “She’s not a former lover. She’s a former employee. I wouldn’t lie about that, Caroline.”

He watched her shift in her seat and he could practically feel her skepticism. Reaching across the table, he circled her wrist with his hand. “I wouldn’t lie about that,” he repeated. “I have no reason to. If there was a lover you needed to know about, I would tell you. I hope you would do the same. I want us both to go into this with our eyes wide open.”

“This?”

“Marriage,” he said firmly.

He felt her retreat and regretted his haste in bringing up what was essentially the reason for this little get-together. But it was too late now.

“Caroline, you must know marriage is my goal. I believe I’ve made that very clear from the beginning. The point of the service we hired is not casual dating.”

“I know,” she said quietly. “You just startled me by talking about it so quickly. I thought we would have more time. I want to get to know you, Dominic.”

“You know me. You know about my work. You’ve seen my home. I don’t know that there is much else to talk about.”

That made her laugh, but there was no humor in the sound. “What about your family, your friends? Your whole life before you started your business?”

“I have no family.” He shook his head and forced himself to take a deep breath. Slow down, he thought. “That sounds more melodramatic than it is. My father left my mother before I was born. My mother died years ago. She was Mexican. My father was American. Is that a problem?”

“Your heritage? No. Besides, it was on your profile. But that isn’t enough. It isn’t nearly enough for two people to read each other’s résumés, have dinner and then decide on marriage.”

Dominic sighed and leaned back in his chair. “I don’t have time for a drawn out romantic courtship. Hell, even if I did, I doubt I would be very good at it. I want to marry you, Caroline. I knew after a few conversations that ultimately you would be suitable.”

She flinched and Dominic cursed under his breath. He was making a hash of the entire evening. He should have said nothing, had more wine and taken her to bed. The morning would have been soon enough to discuss the future.

Dear Caroline,

I told you my world resolves around work. However, last night during our conversation you seemed determined to find some other hobby or interest. I suppose I enjoy swimming, as well. I like the feeling of floating above the surface. Pushing my body in exercise. I love the freedom.

D

Unable to sit, Caroline stood up and wandered out of the kitchen and through the living room. Once there she could look down to the office and gym and from there see the glittering reflection of light on the surface of the pool. Beyond the glass house, the ocean crashed against the surf, leaving nothing but puffs of white to assure her that she wasn’t lost in space.

It had taken so much courage to come here, she thought. So much to beat down the coward inside her. To pull herself away from her quiet little house and her quiet little town. The strength of ten men to leave her quiet little life and take a chance on the unknown.

She hadn’t needed the therapist she’d worked with after her parents’ deaths to explain the obvious. Her life, the life she’d known until she was sixteen, had been suddenly and irrevocably altered. It had changed her from a free-spirited teenager into a coward. Someone who always played it safe, who didn’t take chances for fear of getting hurt again.

This wasn’t safe. This had taken courage. Just to get on the plane and come here.

Only Dominic was asking for more.

“I don’t know that I can do this,” she muttered. It was the coward speaking and she hated it.

“Why did you come, then?”

She turned and found him nearer than she would have expected. Unnerved by his closeness, she took the stairs down to the pool room.

Maybe it was the pool that brought her here. His description of swimming gave him character beyond his curt e-mails. His one-syllable answers during their phone calls. It made her believe there was more to him. More of what she wasn’t sure. It was too intangible to name.

“I asked you a question.” This time he left a few feet between them but he still had followed her.

“Why did you pick me?” she asked instead. “Of all the profiles what was it about mine?”

He looked away and she wasn’t sure if he was searching for the truth or the answer she wanted to hear.

“I picked you because of your career,” he finally said. “I thought you would be used to a quiet life. Being on your own for so long, I didn’t think you would make unnecessary demands on my time. Time I don’t have to give.”

The truth. It was certainly brutal enough. She supposed she had to respect him for that.

“I’m sorry if that upsets you,” he said.

The truth couldn’t upset her. It helped to ground her in a reality that was quickly slipping away.

“Answer me. Why did you come?” he repeated.

He took a step closer, his eyes fixed on hers forcing her to meet his gaze.

Why had she come?

Why hadn’t she stayed home? With her work and her small circle of friends. Her fuzzy slippers and flannel pajamas. Why hadn’t she just gotten a damn kitten?

Because you were tired of being afraid. Because you decided you could want again. A family. A chance at having a family.

That seemed too personal to share with him. Because it meant so much more to her than a simple word. She struggled to find an answer that would appease him. “I wanted to find…”

“Love?” he interrupted. “Surely you’re not so naive, Caroline. Love is an aberration. At best a fleeting emotion that dies quickly once routine sets in. Two people of the same mind, with similar goals and compatible personalities can form a bond. A marriage based on that can be infinitely stronger than two people in love.”

She didn’t agree. But she didn’t see the need to contradict him, either. “I was going to say happiness.”

“I don’t know about happiness.” Dominic took another step closer. This time he reached out and took her hand. “But I can give you what you want.”

“What I want?”

“A child.”

She jumped a bit and he must have seen her reaction because he stilled.

“Your profile said you wanted children. You told me you even considered having a child on your own.”

“I did,” she blurted out. “I did consider that.” But the coward had won then, too, convinced her she couldn’t do it alone.

“You want a family don’t you?”

The word was like a punch to her gut. It struck at the very core of who she was and what she’d lost and she realized that there was no point in holding back. Not if he was going to be her husband.

“I have no family, either. My parents were killed in a car accident when I was sixteen. I lived with an older aunt but she passed away two years ago. I’ve been alone. Not lonely. But alone. I decided I wanted more.”

He nodded and she thought that he understood. A man who had lost his mother would know what it meant to start again. To take a risk and try to create a new family when you had already suffered the pain of losing one.

“Let me give you that.”

“I’m thirty-five,” she whispered even as he was tugging her closer. “It might not be that easy.”

A hand reached up and slipped around her neck. She felt the warmth and the weight of it in her hair tilting her neck ever so slightly to the side.

“We can try. We can keep trying.” He bent his head then and his lips touched hers. The bolt of attraction she’d been struck with when she saw him for the first time tripled, then quadrupled as his lips played with hers. His mouth opened and took possession. His tongue thrust deep. It had been so long. It felt so sinfully good.

Dark hair, dark eyes and the body of man who liked to push himself in exercise were easy excuses for his appeal, but Caroline knew it was the other things that coerced her into wanting him. His small barely-there smile. How his hand stroked Munch’s fur. The way he held her close to him without suffocating her.

His head lifted and she knew he was staring down at her, but she didn’t want to open her eyes. She didn’t want to see the man she’d just met for the first time tonight. The man she’d only exchanged e-mails and phone calls with. Instead she needed him to kiss her again so she could go back to feeling as if she was in the arms of someone she’d known most of her life.

“Tell me you want this, Caroline. Tell me and I’ll take you upstairs.”

She lifted her hand to his chest and felt his heart beat heavily through his shirt. It was time to say that it was happening too fast. Time to retreat and head to her own bedroom. The coward was ready to bolt. But the fighter, the one who pushed her out of the house and on the plane to come here, the one who was willing to take another chance on life, stood her ground.

“Tell me.”

His urgency was palpable and it fueled her need.

Tell him. Tell him.

But words wouldn’t form in her mouth. Since they typically fell easier from her fingers, she reached up and cupped his face and then lifted herself so that she could kiss him in return. Letting him know in the only way she was capable of that yes, she did want this.

She wanted him.

Chapter 3

Caroline let Dominic lead her back up the stairs without a protest. She didn’t want to tug on his hand, fearing he might stop. A stern “stay!” kept Munch happily curled up on the couch in the living room. Then the next thing she knew, she was standing in the bedroom.

His room.

She reminded herself that this wasn’t like her. A woman didn’t stay single as long as she had without having some reservations when it came to men. Sex was an important thing and she took it seriously. Maybe too seriously. But all her internal defense mechanisms evaporated with his kiss.

She should have known it would be this way.

Hadn’t she reacted the first time she saw his picture? As if her stomach had plummeted to her feet. His serious eyes and serious mouth. When his name popped up in her e-mail, she smiled. His voice on the phone made her shiver. She wanted him before she’d agreed to his invitation.

She told herself it was her active imagination. That it was just the hope of what he could give her that made him seem so attractive. But she knew there was nothing imaginary about it. She’d come here for him. Because something inside her said he was waiting for her. And he kissed her not like a man bent on seduction, but rather like a man already in the grip of need. As if he’d wanted her before he’d ever seen her, too.

“Caroline,” he whispered. His mouth left hers, taking her breath with it. “I’m sorry. I should go slower.”

“No.” She didn’t want to go slow. She didn’t want to have time to think. She wanted to act. Reaching down she pulled her sweater over her head, letting her hair fall in a muss about her shoulders.

The simple bra wasn’t enticing and it hadn’t occurred to her to wear anything more daring, but she could feel Dominic’s eyes on her. With a gentle push, he turned her around so that she faced away from him. He bent her head forward and brushed aside her hair, his mouth falling hot and wet on the nape of her neck. His hands cupped her breasts from behind and squeezed.

The sensation was stunning. After so long—so long she didn’t want to even think about it—of not being held or touched or treated like a woman, this was sensory overload. His fingers pulled down the straps of her bra until the cups gave up their hold on her breasts and his hands were there instead. He pinched her hardening nipples while his mouth made a trail down her spine. One sharp tug and the bra was gone. Then his hands were on the front of her jeans while his lips traced soft kisses over her bare shoulder.

She watched him undo the button and zipper, saw him sink his hands into her practical white panties. The sensation of watching and feeling his fingers touching her sent a bolt of heat through her belly. Then he bent to pull off the rest of her clothes. Was it her imagination or did he linger over the socks? His fingers pulled them off. First one, then the other. His hand settled on her calf and even that simple touch made her shudder.

She could hear the rustle of material behind her and knew that he was taking off his clothes. Instinct demanded that she turn and help him. That she entice him with small touches and kisses like he’d done as he undressed her, but instead she stood frozen staring at the bed. Soon he’d be inside her and it would probably change her life.

A hand gently grazed her ass as he stepped around her. He sat on the bed and moved to the center of it, stretching himself out. The moon, high on a clear night, provided more than enough illumination for her to see. He seemed bigger to her without his clothes. More substantial. His sex thrust up high and thick from a dark nest of hair between his legs. His thighs were slightly separated, urging her, it seemed, to step between them.

“Caroline.” Dominic reached out his hand to her.

Crawling—there was no other word for it—onto the bed and up his body, she settled her bottom gingerly on his belly, her arms pinned on either side of his head. His hands came up to play with her breasts again, his finger and thumb tugging on her nipple until her neck arched, then her back.

“Do we have a condom?” Her words were muffled as one of his hands circled her body. A finger traced her spine, ran over her bottom, then up her stomach until he once again palmed her breast.

“You can trust me. I’m safe.”

She shook her head, as if to say that wasn’t what she meant. But he was pulling her head down toward him, his tongue playing with her lips until it pushed deep into her mouth.

“This is your decision,” he muttered. He teased the corner of her lips making her want more than ever the deep impact of his kiss.

“Mine,” she conceded. Her choice. Her life. Her decision.

Her future.

She found herself shifting backward, twisting her hips until she felt the broad head of his erection butting up against her curls. She could feel how wet she was, knew he could feel it, too, and wasn’t sure if she should be embarrassed by how quickly he’d brought her to this state.

“You have to help me,” she said even as she reached down to bring him closer. She forgot how thrilling it was to hold a man’s sex in her hand. To feel it pulse. Soft skin over resolute hardness. It beckoned her to take more. His hand was on her hip, guiding her and she could feel him sinking into her one hard inch at a time. Her body resisted at first, but his insistence and her slickness were no match for any defense she might muster.

Joining. Mating. The words were weak in comparison to how it felt to take him inside.

Instinctively she moved on him as he thrust up slightly. His knuckle found its way between her legs, teasing that perfect spot that made her see light even though her eyes were closed.

“More,” he muttered. “Take more.”

Opening her eyes, she wasn’t sure what he meant. It felt as if she were already speared on him. But his eyes were closed and his jaw was tight. The muscles in his neck were corded as if he were in pain. It wasn’t what she wanted for him. Her hands rested on his smooth chest and she used them for leverage as she sat up and indeed felt him slide deeper. Then that persistent finger between her legs, so intent on pulling on her, stroking her, catapulted her into a climax before she knew she was that close.

When the last tug of her muscles had subsided, he rolled her onto her back with gentle persistence. His face above hers, his mouth only a breath away. In the dark, the harsh lines of his cheeks and chin should have been frightening, but they weren’t.

“Tell me if this is too much,” he muttered in her ear, as his body lowered completely over hers. She felt him push into her and knew that she’d barely taken half of his erection. For a moment she wanted to protest. Her nails dug into his shoulders as her body was stretched and filled beyond what she thought she could take. She felt him stop and instinctively knew what it cost him. Focusing on relaxing, she tilted her hips toward him, encouraging him.

“It’s okay,” she muttered. “It’s okay.”

“I don’t want to hurt you,” he growled.

She could feel him pulling back. In retaliation she wrapped her legs around his hips. The action sent him deeper and this time beyond the pain she knew a fulfillment she’d never dreamed was possible.

“You’re not hurting me.” At least not enough to make her give up the pleasure of it.

His head dipped and he took her lips even as his body began to move more urgently. Each penetration was so deep. Before she could think about how one thrust felt there was another and another. It was too much. Too much heat. Too much power. Too much intensity. But she wouldn’t have stopped him for the world. It was like being in the center of a storm. There was danger. A sense of fear. But also the thrill of watching it happen, of feeling it explode around her. She embraced it, all of it and relished in her triumph over the coward because for now it was gone.

For the second time she came and wondered if she might faint from the incredible rush.

Hanging on to her senses, she felt his body surge. She heard his muttered growl against her neck and felt the wet hot seed from his body pumping inside her. Caroline didn’t realize you could feel that. Didn’t know it was possible.

Slowly he eased away from her, rolling onto his back. She could still feel him between her legs and imagined she would continue to do so for hours. There was something entirely erotic about that. She rubbed her legs together and felt the wetness there.

Harsh short breaths from both of them broke the silence until she couldn’t not say something.

“I can’t believe we didn’t use anything,” she panted.

He said nothing.

She didn’t turn toward him, didn’t feel that she could. The intimacy they had just shared was suddenly gone. He wasn’t touching her. Wasn’t stroking her. She felt tears well up in her eyes and willed them away. This had been good. Amazing. Maybe he was nervous about the step they had just taken. Maybe he was as afraid as she was.

“You said you wanted to be a father, but I didn’t realize you wanted it that quickly.”

The bed shifted as he adjusted his weight toward her, but he still didn’t touch her.

“I said I wanted a child. I have a legacy to offer. Something I’ve built. I want to give that to my child. What kind of father I will be, I don’t know. I want to be honest with you, Caroline.”

“You have been so far. I think.”

She turned her head and saw even through the darkness the stark white of his eyes. His hand reached out and settled on her stomach. A slow warmth built there and radiated throughout her limbs.

Finally. A touch.

“I don’t imagine that I would make a decent parent. Or husband, for that matter. My work, it is who I am, not just what I do. But I will provide for you. I will never let anyone hurt you or our baby. I will be as much a part of your lives as I can. That has to be enough.” He seemed to catch himself. “Is that enough?”

Was it enough?

Caroline glanced down at the hand that rested protectively against an unlikely conception. She easily could get up now, dress and leave. He’d given her a snapshot of her future, their marriage. An absent husband and father. She had no real ties to him. There were other men that the service she’d hired could set her up with. Another man might be more open to having a real family rather than simply inviting a woman and a child to come live in his house. If she’d found the courage to do this once, maybe she could do it again.

But that man wouldn’t be Dominic. That was the true trap. Not some wisp of an idea that their relationship might result in a child.

“What happens if you fall desperately in love with me?” She smiled as she cupped his very stern face in her hand. She felt a muscle twitch under her palm and soothed it.

“Marry me, Caroline. Please.”

Talk about a leap of faith. She might as well have been standing outside on the cliffs. She could turn back and take the safe path home, something she’d been doing all of her life. Or she could jump. She waited for the fear to creep up on her. Was ready to do battle with it. But there was nothing. Nothing but a sense of certainty.

“All right.”

He thought she might have fallen asleep but it was hard to tell. The sex and the overwhelming release of his orgasm should have been enough to put him in a coma for the next few days, let alone hours. Instead he was staring at the ceiling.

A soft purr emanated from the space beside him.

Yes, she was definitely out. Dominic envied her sleep and wondered why he couldn’t follow. Surely, he’d gotten the better of the deal tonight. He wanted sex. He wanted a conclusion. He wanted a child.

He received one, was promised the other and had the hope of the last.

His eyes were wide open.

Was it because of the feelings she’d invoked? Taking her, he’d gone beyond desire or need. Yes, there was the symmetry of motion that made for good sex. It was easy to label it chemistry. He’d had good sex before. He knew what it felt like. This was good and different. Memorable, but also unnerving.

That was okay. They liked one another. Lusted after each other. That would help make their marriage stick.

He didn’t think that was keeping him awake.

It could be he had some antiquated notion that good sex automatically equaled a baby and as ready as he said he was for that, he wasn’t.

He only wished he could make himself believe that.

There was no point in lying to himself. He was wide awake, listening to his fiancée—his fiancée—breathe because he knew that despite his declarations he hadn’t told her the whole truth.

He should have told her who he really was. What he really was.

He should have let her know before she agreed to marry him that he could be dangerous.