It Should Happen To You

My table. Her eyes narrowed. Nothing like arrogance to piss a woman off, especially Mickey. She had heard the tone before. Dr. Breedlove had tried it her rookie year at Astrophysical Sciences Research Center. Her nuclei and elementary particles prof at U of C tried it, too, and both had been easily shot down. That’s what happened when you could solve Maxwell’s equation at the age of eighteen.

Mickey pulled at her tortoiseshell glasses until she could stare down her nose at him. “I’m here on business, so you might as well stop your gawking and sit your pretty little ass right down.” She smiled innocently. “Sweet cheeks.”

The coolness in the dark eyes heated. Damn, he was a handsome devil. Handsome in the ways of those Italian boys with high cheekbones and dark, brooding looks that said, “Casanova was my grandfather.”

Not the sort of man that roamed the composite-floor hallways at Astrophysical Sciences Research Center.

Not that she was noticing, or anything. Defiantly she raised her chin.

“Say what you want to say. It’s a free country.” Then he sprawled into the tiny chair next to her, his legs comfortably apart. A pose designed to draw attention to his well-muscled thighs and his well-muscled other parts.

Not that she was noticing, or anything.

Mickey tore her gaze away from his parts. “I want to hire you.”

His reaction wasn’t quite what she wanted. His legs closed, his arms folded across his chest, and his eyes could’ve turned her to stone. “No.”

“You haven’t even asked what I want you to do.”

He stared up at the ceiling, doing a fine job of avoiding her eyes. “I don’t want to know.”

This was not good. “I could pay you,” she whispered. “Pay you well.” The dark eyes flickered back to earth.

“I don’t do anything illegal,” he said, slow and quiet, in a tone that implied that he did things illegal on a daily basis.

Mickey took a sip of coffee. “It’s not that illegal. I’ve got some property that needs returning.”

“To who?” he asked.

“Whom,” she corrected, now portraying the part of a bimbo grammarian. Focus, Mick. “To me.”

“You got the wrong city block for drug deals gone bad.”

“No drugs. It’s a tape.”

His dark eyebrows drew together at a perfect forty-five degree angle. “Who’s holding it?”

Mickey slid a piece of paper across the table. Slimeball Intern’s name and address were printed in twelve-point Arial type so that there were no mistakes. She’d seen that on Law & Order.

“How much are we talking here?”

“Two-hundred dollars.”

The eyes closed off again. “Sorry, lady.”

Quickly Mickey backtracked. The going rate for breaking and entering was not posted on CNN. “Two thousand.” It would kill her savings, but for a career-sustaining insurance policy, it was worth it. She needed muscle, and she was willing to pay for it.

Again she caught the flicker of interest in his face before it disappeared. “No.”

“Please,” she said. It was about the closest she’d ever come to begging in her entire life, but she needed help.

“How do you know there’s only one tape?”

Mickey closed her eyes. This was where things got tricky and moved into the realm of diplomatic finagling. “If there’s more than one tape, then work—of a more forceful nature—might be involved. You do any leg breaking? Whacking?” she asked, successfully imagining Slimeball Intern screaming in pain. She smiled.

“No,” he said, and the screams in her dreams drifted away.

“Oh,” she muttered softly, thinking it was probably a good thing that Slimeball Intern wouldn’t get hurt. Secretly she was still disappointed.

“So you’ll do it?” she asked, just as the door swung open. The bells on the top jangled, and a big man walked through. Big, beefy, with frown lines that were carved permanently into his face.

Mickey shot a quick glance in Beth’s direction to see if she’d been watching, but right now Beth was missing. And where was moral support when you needed it? Off refilling the Frappuccino mix.

Slowly the big guy lumbered over to where she was sitting.

“We’re done,” Dominic said to Mickey, as if she were nothing more than a nanofly.

Sensing the other man was a business associate, in the haziest definition of the word, Mickey stood. “You’ll do it?”

He didn’t reply, just grabbed her and dumped her in his lap.

Whoa.

“What—”

And he kissed her. Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God…

An electrical charge fired everywhere he touched, and somewhere in her nether regions condensation began to form. What had she been missing out on by not kissing wise guys before? That was the last thing she remembered before her brain began to spark and fizzle.

Her body melted, draping over his in a nicely accommodating fashion. Another two nanoseconds and she’d be ready for sex.

He stopped before she really embarrassed herself, which was a good thing. Then he patted her bum and whispered in her ear, “You need to get out of here really, really fast. Meet me here tomorrow at ten. I’ll help you, but don’t say anything right now.”

Like she was capable of speech. Ha.

For a long moment she stared at him, trying to read exactly what he was thinking. This time what she saw in his eyes surprised her. None of the “leg-breaking” coldness, nor the “Come to me, cara mia” heat, but instead there was just—curiosity. The kind that she saw everyday at Astrophysical Sciences Research Center.

She blinked, and whoosh—it was gone and the cold was back.

“See you later,” he said, in a husky tone that implied all sorts of carnal treats. He spoiled it all by giving her another pat on the rear.

She should have socked him, but that “later” part was still echoing in her head.

Then she glanced at the big Gonzo that cast a long shadow over the table. “Yeah, all right,” she said, then pulled down her glasses, just so he didn’t think he could boss her around. “Sweet cheeks.”

2

DOMINIC CORLUCCI HAD to work hard to keep the smile off his face. A woman like that? She could make a man forget a lot.

However, Dominic’s memories were too well ingrained to forget anything. Self-preservation was his number-one priority now. The only reason he had kissed her was to stave off unnecessary questions; his companion saw one use in a woman and one use only.

Maybe that was his only reason, or maybe she aroused his curiosity—among other things.

He watched her walk away, an exaggerated swing in her hips that didn’t look normal. He didn’t know who she was, but he did know that something reeked of a setup. That worried him.

“So I was telling Louise, ‘Louise,’ I said, ‘I’m not ready to settle down. If you’re looking for a man to play house with, then you need to be finding greener pastures.’”

Dom turned his attention away from the puzzle of the retreating female and back to the job at hand. Namely Frankie “Lumpy” DeCarlo.

“Yeah, females ain’t nothing but trouble,” he muttered, trying to figure her angle.

“Amen. Who’s the legs?”

“A potential sheet warmer. Need to try her on for size.” He cracked his knuckles for effect.

The big man considered it for a moment, rubbing his chin. “I’d do her.”

Dom stretched in the damned little seat, all casual, a man having a cup of coffee, nothing more. “You seen her around before?”

Frankie scratched his head. “You know, she looks a little like Big Jake’s ex, but that one—and she was trouble, I tell you—didn’t wear no glasses. Odd look, the glasses and all.”

Definitely odd. Dom didn’t trust anybody. A man got real dead, real fast that way. “Yeah, but it’s kinda cute, don’t you think?”

“Me, I like my women stacked. A man needs something to hold on to.”

Dom gave Frankie a sideways look. “I bet you have all the women panting after you.”

Frankie gave him a palms-up. “All my problems can be attributed to slow horses and fast women. I’m a veritable babe in the woods compared to you lothario types.”

Dom kept silent. It helped his image when he didn’t talk about women; he just smiled mysteriously every now and then. Made everybody wonder. He smiled now, the smile of a man remembering his last good lay.

“I haven’t seen Johnny C. around lately,” he said, casually changing the subject. “Where’s he gone? Sold us out for those guys back east?”

“Don’t know. Vinny’s been keeping quiet lately.” Frankie looked around, watching the other people in the store. “Let’s go to Dilly’s place.”

Dilly’s place was a good sign. Dom hadn’t yet been invited to the more sacrosanct confines, and if he was getting an invitation now, that meant Frankie was starting to trust him.

That might be the perfect time to pitch his ATM scam. Nothing obvious or too eager. Cast the floater out and then just skim the line back and forth over the surface.

Dom uncurled his legs and stood. That was the bitch of these little places. A tall man needed a place to stretch out.

He caught the eye of the street cop that walked in the door. Badge 271. They’d been in the Academy together. Dom shrugged into his jacket, keeping his face turned away. The cops didn’t worry him as much as the attorneys. Cops knew to keep their mouths shut. But an attorney? Slimeballs who were paid to yap. Still, as he walked past 271, he kept his face firmly in the shadows. Big Frankie didn’t notice at all.

MICKEY CAUGHT HER reflection in the rearview mirror, just as she hit the highway to Batavia. She had forgotten to rub off her eyeliner. Not that anyone would notice. Nobody really noticed her looks except when she was dolled up, either as a bridesmaid, or a bimbo.

Neither of which was her.

No, guys like Dominic Corlucci would never notice Mickey in the world that she lived in.

He was the polar opposite of Slimeball Intern Monihan and a hell of a kisser. Her lips were still tingling from the effects, and if she closed her eyes she could still recall the centrifugal force that was buzzing between her legs.

Times like this, a woman could be glad that the man was a gangster. It made him oh so easy to resist.

Definitely trouble. In fact, by the time she’d made it to the triple-axe sculpture that bridged high over the entrance to the lab, she had made up her mind. No point in endangering her loins or her life. She could just forget about Dominic Corlucci altogether.

I’m not going to be disappointed about it, either, she thought sternly to herself and to all body parts that reverberated whenever his magnetic field snapped its fingers.

She slid her badge into the front-door locks and went inside the long narrow corridors. Astrophysical Sciences Research Center. This was her home. Sometimes it still overwhelmed her. Quarks, tau neutrino, hell, even the Internet was conceived of here, contrary to what the politicians thought. These were the discoveries that rocked the world.

These discoveries were the very building blocks of the universe. People never appreciated the simplicity of the atom and all its components. Such a small, simple body, so powerful yet so overlooked.

And Mickey knew just how that felt.

Her sneakers squeaked as she walked down the halls where Lederman had walked. The seventh floor of the high-rise was where she did her work, and she found her way to the small, functional desk in the back of the pen.

She worked on the Sloan Digital Sky Survey, which she considered her own personal heaven. Mapping out the cosmos with pictures and light. That was all Mickey had ever wanted to do—work with the stars.

Every morning the schedule was the same, even if she came in late, which she was today. The great thing about research was that most scientists kept odd hours. Inspiration couldn’t be scheduled, nor could experiments that took three years to complete.

She turned on her computer and checked e-mail first. Empty. Next, just because she was a creature of habit, she checked to see who was online.

Chao: Unavailable.

Dr. Lindstrom: Available.

J.: Unavailable.

Yeah, Jessica was off having a honeymoon in China. Dejected, Mickey rolled back in her chair. Mountain climbing, which was about the silliest thing that Mickey had ever heard. Her ideal honeymoon would involve a trip to Geneva to see CERN and possibly some sightseeing. Then a long week in the hotel, with room service and HBO.

In lieu of actually having someone to talk to, Mickey started typing to herself.

“M, what’s up?”

She clicked Send and delighted herself when new mail appeared. Getting into the game, she hit Reply and started typing.

“M, glad you asked. What to do, what to do? I’m not a girlie-girl. I don’t want to be a girlie-girl. But I keep doing these stupid men things. Just like a girlie-girl. Does that make me an idiot?”

Then she clicked Send.

Magically, a few moments later, she had new mail. She started hammering away at the keyboard.

“M, no, you’re not a girlie-girl, because all members of the Coleman family—except your mother, and we’re not going to talk about that—are scientists. We use our brains to succeed where others have failed.”

Send.

“If I’m not a failure, then why am I being blackmailed with a sex tape? Why am I considering an affiliation with the mob? Why am I attracted to Dominic?”

Send.

“M, I lied. You’re a loser AND a girlie-girl. Get over it.”

Mickey stared at her screen and wished that the J-woman was back. Jessica wasn’t this harsh.

Maybe she should build Beth a computer and teach her how to use it. Actually, that wasn’t a bad idea. Tomorrow, definitely tomorrow.

She took a quick look up to the front of the bull pen.

Damn, John was in. His Michael Crichton Sphere screen saver flickered eerily in the fluorescent lighting. Of course he couldn’t be sick today. Illness would be nice. Something vile and long lasting with symptoms that included pain-racked stomach spasms, huge bouts of nausea and perhaps a high fever, where he might be so incapacitated that he would simply hand over the tape.

She’d seen that on TV once.

When he walked into the room ten minutes later, he looked disgustingly healthy. Now, when she looked at him, her poor vision free of lust and alcohol, she could see the weak chin, the beady eyes that darted like a rat’s. Man, she had been so blind before. It was probably his golden hair that had blinded her to the rest of his faults. Yeah, definitely. The laughing blue eyes—that darted like a rat’s, of course—hadn’t helped.

Then he winked at her. Winked. As if she would be happy to see him. He was lucky she wasn’t working in the Tevatron. Proton collisions could be really messy. One false move, and zap—a human body could be transported to—well, everywhere, really. Just tiny Monihan particles floating in the air. Wouldn’t that be nice?

Oblivious to her degenerative thoughts, he lifted his Coke in greeting and strolled over. “Top of the morning, Miss Coleman. We on for this evening?”

She stared down at him over her glasses. “Go choke on a quark, Monihan.”

“I love it when you get feisty.” He pitched his voice an octave higher, “Oh, baby, yeah, right there…”

Had she really said that? Thank God she’d been too drunk to remember. She kept her eyes on her computer screen and whispered. “I got friends, Monihan. Friends that can really hurt you. I wouldn’t be so quick to make jokes.”

He leaned forward, the laughing blue eyes deadly serious. “You think this a joke? Not at all. Your career’s been shot into a black hole unless you cooperate. You know the presentation for Heidelman? I’ll bring the video.”

“I could go to Heidelman and just report you for sexual harassment.”

He looked intrigued. “Are you going to? A tough character-defining choice. Which is more important to you? Justice or your academic image? That’s how you know what you’re really made of. Which path are you going to take?”

Mickey looked up, close enough where she could see the true ugliness of his nature. “What has happened to you? You used to be nice, now you’re just a bastard. Have you ever seen what a positron beam can do to human flesh? I’d say that’s one directional splatter we’ve yet to map. What do you say, John? Want to go down in history?”

He took a sip of cola, looking completely unfazed by threats of evaporation. “Does that mean we’re on for tonight? I’ve got to work late in the lab this evening, but for you? I’ll wait up.”

Wait up? He’d have to wait for hell to freeze, for time travel to be possible and for the discovery of Higgs Boson. “I have a hot date with my boyfriend,” she said.

“You don’t have a boyfriend, Mickey. Remember?”

She raised an eyebrow. Very Queen Elizabeth. “Maybe I do.”

“Yeah, right. Look, I’ll let you have your fun. Tonight you’re off the hook. And I’ll be nice and leave you the weekend free, but come Monday…” His voice trailed off, and he flicked a finger under her chin.

At his touch, she flinched, saddened that she’d actually had a pleasant carnal-knowledge experience with this creep. “You’re watching too many bad movies, Monihan.”

He walked over to his computer and clicked on his mouse a few times. Instantly the air was filled with moans and heavy breathing.

She slapped her hand down on her desk, welcoming the pain. “Shut it off.”

“Monday night?”

When the seventh quark was discovered, and not a moment before. Mickey shot him a dire look. “Whatever.”

IT WAS DARK OUT; the apartment complex was in a seedy part of the South Side. Thankfully, security lights were nonexistent. Mickey brought out her flashlight as they made their way to the side of the building.

“Ready?” she asked, whispering behind her.

“Are you sure we should be doing this?” was Beth’s sole vote of confidence.

“I don’t have a choice.”

“Yeah, you do. Hire Dominic.”

“He’s too expensive. And besides that, he’s dangerous.”

“Well, yes. But expensive means that he’s good, and you live for danger.”

Mickey shone her flashlight in Beth’s face to see if she was serious. Not a trace of a smile. Sometimes Beth scared her.

“I can do this,” Mickey answered, just as she found the old fire escape. Bingo.

“And why do you think that?”

Mickey pulled at the ladder, and the whole world resounded with the painful creak. “I researched breaking and entering on the Internet.”

Behind her, she heard the sound of Beth rolling her eyeballs.

Now wasn’t the time for naysayers, though. She searched through her bag until she found the can of WD-40. There’s always another use. Little did the advertisers realize, it could also be used for B and E. One spritz and the ladder was as quiet as the lab on Sunday.

“Okay, Shifty, what do we do next?” asked Beth.

Mickey climbed onto the fire escape and got to the second floor. Quickly Beth scampered up behind her. Then Mickey shone her light on the wooden window frame. It looked just like the diagram on the Net. “We can lift up on this and slide it off its tracks.”

“I’ll take this side,” said Beth, positioning herself at one end.

Mickey put down the flashlight and grabbed the other side. “One, two, three. Lift.”

They heaved.

Nothing.

Mickey took a long breath. “Okay, we’re just not putting enough into this.”

“Excuse me. I was. I put everything into that lift. Aren’t you supposed to know how to do this? Can we just teleport it, or something?”

“Transport. And that only works in Star Trek.”

“I’m losing faith in you, Mickey. I didn’t think this was going to work, but I told myself, ‘No, if anybody can hypothesize her way out of this, it’s you.’ I was wrong.” Beth, when tired, got mouthy.

Mickey, who had no patience for tired, mouthy women, shot her a warning look. “Shh. One more time.”

They got in place again.

“One, two, three. Lift.”

Somewhere in the dark they heard a noise.

“What was that?” Mickey asked, her heart pounding wildly.

Beth looked down below. “A cat.”

“One more time.”

“Maybe we could just break it?”

Mickey cased the joint, considering the idea. Everything was too quiet. “Nah. Somebody might hear us.”

“Can we try the front door? Maybe it’s unlocked.”

“You have no imagination.”

“Logic, Mick. It’s called logic.”

Beth had a point. Mickey abandoned her short life of crime. “Okay.”

They climbed back down and entered the building’s lobby. John’s apartment was on the second floor, right at the top of the stairs. Mickey handed the flashlight to Beth and tried the doorknob.

Locked.

Beth stared at Mickey’s hand, her mouth open. “You’re wearing gloves?”

“I didn’t want to leave any prints.”

“And what about me?”

Mickey had researched that, too. “Your prints aren’t on file. No worries.”

“What? You’ve been arrested before?”

“No. Anybody that handles plutonium gets printed and filed in the national database. Procedure.”

Beth got a little wide-eyed. “You really work with plutonium?”

“Nah. Just a little prison humor.”

Beth wasn’t amused. “Can we go now?”

A long beam of headlights lit up the window off the stairwell.

“Somebody’s coming,” Mickey said, and then took off up the stairs to the third floor. “Up here. If it’s John, he won’t see us.”

Beth followed right behind, a streak in black spandex and sweater. Very stylish. Silently they waited for the door to open below.

The door eased open and an old man creaked his way into the foyer. Mickey began to breathe again. “False alarm.”

“Look, this isn’t working. You need to hire Dominic.”

Oh, hell.

Mickey leaned against the rickety stair rail and faced the whole truth. Sadly, her life as she knew it was pretty much screwed unless she got that tape back, and Dominic Corlucci, mob guy extraordinaire, seemed the best answer.

Somewhere upstairs, a stereo cranked up. Loud, discordant and really, really bad music.

Mickey sighed. “Oh, all right.”

“Want to get a beer?”

“Soft drink for me,” she answered. She was still paying for the aftereffects of her last binge.

“I’ll buy.”

Mickey stuffed her gloves in her pocket and studied her own attire. Black sweatshirt and matching knit pants. Passable, but barely. “You think we should change?”

Beth shook her head. “Nah. Black is very in.”

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