Military Daddy

“Please don’t go. I’m a total jerk. Ask anyone who knows me. I put my foot in my mouth fifty times a day.”

The sincerity of his plea gave her pause, but it was the look in his eyes that made her stay. “That must make it hard to march in formation.”

He relaxed, a ghost of a smile curving his lips. “I’m lucky—in my outfit the horses do all the legwork.”

He drew his hand away slowly. Oddly she wished he hadn’t. For a tiny fraction of time she had felt comforted by his touch.

It was ridiculous. She didn’t need his help, his money or his comfort.

“Can you accept that I’m a well-meaning, if inept, person?” he asked.

“I guess I can accept that.”

“Good. I honestly do want to help. Tell me how.”

It would be so easy to give in to his pleading and let him shoulder the responsibility of providing the things she and the baby would need. Things like their own place to live, a crib, even clothes for the baby. But to do that would be like going backward in her recovery.

Once, she had used alcohol as her crutch to make life bearable. She wouldn’t substitute that addiction for a dependence on this man, even if it seemed harmless on the surface. Her track record with relationships didn’t include any that had been harmless.

“Thanks for the offer, but I think the best thing for both of us is to go our separate ways.”

“I have rights as a parent.” His tone carried a new determination.

So he wasn’t harmless after all. “What are you saying?”

“Under the law, I have the same right to this baby that you do.”

“Is that a threat? If you think you can take my baby away, you had better think again. I’m not afraid of you.”

He held up both hands and shook his head. “It’s not a threat. I’m not saying I would make the better parent.” Leaning forward, he clasped his hands together. “I have no intention of trying to take this baby away from you. I’m only saying that I have an equal responsibility to take care of him or her.”

She wasn’t sure she believed him. Trusting men was as foreign to her as owning diamond earrings.

He sat back and wrapped his hands around his mug of coffee. “You should drink your cocoa before it gets cold.”

Annie lifted the cup to her lips and took a sip of the rich, sweet chocolate. It helped steady her nerves and gave her a chance to think about what she needed to do next. Shane was making it evident that he wasn’t about to go away.

Suspecting he was right about the law, she had no intention of making it a legal matter. Even with the testimony of Marge as her sponsor, Annie doubted that a judge would overlook her past in a custody battle. For the moment, Corporal Shane Ross had the upper hand.

Would he turn out to be a dog in the manger? Once he got what he wanted, would he lose interest? His story about the little boy he had lost to a deadbeat dad didn’t mean that he wouldn’t follow the same pattern. Perhaps instead of fighting him, she should wait and let time do the work for her. Not many of the men she’d known came through on their promises. Why should she think Shane would be any different?

She couldn’t quite silence the small voice in the back of her mind that told her this man was different.

“Have you thought about adoption?” he asked after a few minutes.

“I’ve considered it, but I want to keep my baby.” She’d admitted the thought aloud for the first time and it felt right.

“That’s good to know. Thank you for telling me.”

Had she made a mistake? Confiding in him was easier than she’d expected. She quickly resolved not to give him any more information. “I should be going.”

“But you haven’t finished your drink.”

“I want to leave now.”

He looked ready to argue but finally nodded and said, “Sure.”

He motioned to the waitress and paid the check. Annie picked up her purse and headed for the door.

Outside, he walked beside her to the staff parking spaces, stopping beside a low-slung red Mustang with a wide black stripe down the hood. The car was obviously not new, but it was in pristine condition. He unlocked and opened the door for her. As she got in, she took note of the difference between his vehicle and hers. His didn’t have rips in the fabric of the front seat. His radio had buttons, while hers didn’t even have the knobs it had come with. She was pretty sure his heater worked no matter how cold it got. Judging by this, he could afford to pay child support.

Temptation came in many forms. Only knowing that she would have to give up more than she would gain kept her from accepting his previous offer. She and her baby wouldn’t have a lavish life, but they would have enough.

“Nice wheels,” she said when he slid into the driver’s seat.

“Thanks. This is a 1973 Mustang Mach One. This puppy is my pride and joy.”

“You can afford a classic car like this on a corporal’s salary?”

He laughed. “She wasn’t much to look at when I first found her, but it still took two summers of roofing in the hot Texas sun to pay for her back when I was a teenager. Restoring her has been a kind of hobby of mine ever since. Besides, I live on base so I don’t have many expenses. This car is my one luxury. Annie, is the fact that I’m in the Army part of the reason you don’t want me involved with our baby?”

It was as good a reason as any. “To my mind, guns and babies don’t to go together.”

“There’s a lot more to the Army than guns.”

“I’m sure that’s true, but how many years have you been in?”

“Six.”

“And how many different places have you been stationed in in that time?”

“Including basic training? Four.”

“That’s not exactly a blueprint for maintaining close family ties.”

“No, but it’s not impossible if you’re willing to work at it.” She heard the resignation creeping into his voice, even if he wouldn’t admit as much.

She drove home her point. “Tell me how we could make it work. Should we ship the kid back and forth between us every six months? Aren’t you going to Germany soon?”

“We live in the same place now.”

“But not for long. I might decide I want to move. Who knows where you’ll be stationed after Germany. It’s too complicated. I need to get on with my life and you need to get on with yours. I wish now that I hadn’t told you.”

“No, don’t wish that.”

A sadness to match his settled over her. “You probably wish you had never met me,” she said softly.

He stared at his hands clasped around the top of the steering wheel for a long moment, then looked over and met her gaze. “No, I don’t.”

He started the engine and shifted into Reverse. She gave him her home address, then leaned back into the plush seat. He didn’t speak during the ride and neither did she.

When he pulled up in front of her house, he shut off the engine and turned toward her. “I can’t help thinking that one of the reasons you don’t want me around the baby is because you don’t know me well.”

“I know you well enough.”

“If you’re referring to the night we met, I’ll be the first to admit that we started off all wrong.”

“So?”

He pressed his hand to his chest, his expression earnest and intense. “I’d like to change that. I’d like to get to know you and I’d like you to get to know me. Someday the kid is going to ask about me. I’d like you to be able to tell him something about what I do and what kind of person I am.”

“What are you suggesting? That we start dating?” She didn’t bother to hide her sarcasm.

“That’s an excellent idea. What are you doing Saturday afternoon?”

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