Her Honor-bound Lawman

“Sure do. Full staff today.”

Steffie was looking up at Tucker curiously as if fascinated by his face or maybe his hat. She reached out her little arms to him and he took a step back.

“Tucker?” Emma asked him, studying him closely.

The little girl’s big blue eyes beseeched him to hold her. He couldn’t resist…and held his arms out, lifting her into them. She fingered the star on his shirt and then touched his cheek and smiled up at him like a little angel who’d dropped down from heaven. His heart ached and his chest tightened. The feel of her in his arms brought back so many memories—Chad laughing and squealing as Tucker tossed him up into the air, as he pushed him on the swing, as he read him a story at night. The pain of letting the memory surface was more than Tucker could take.

He handed Steffie back to Emma. “I got a call from a detective in Omaha. There’s a man there who’s looking for his daughter. Her name is Emma. The photo I faxed them didn’t come through clearly and he’d like to see you…meet you and determine if you’re his daughter.”

Emma’s face paled. “You want to leave now?”

“Yes. I’ll call him and tell him we’re on our way. Roy said the man was free anytime. I’ll meet you outside.”

Steffie’s arms tangled around Emma’s neck and the year-old laid her head on Emma’s shoulder. Emma smoothed the baby’s hair and lightly kissed her forehead. When she looked up, Tucker was already through the foyer and opening the outside door.

The sheriff was such an enigma to her. His reaction to Steffie just now…There’d been such pain in his eyes and then such longing before he’d guarded himself, before he’d put Steffie back in Emma’s arms.

Hannah had set Sammy in the playpen and a string of red, yellow and blue beads kept his attention for the moment. Hannah held her arms out to Steffie, and Steffie went reluctantly to the woman who’d been her primary caretaker for the past two months. “Good luck,” Hannah said to Emma.

“Thanks. I’m almost afraid to hope. I can come in tomorrow and help until my doctor’s appointment at three-thirty.”

“Are you feeling all right?”

“Fine. It’s just a checkup. The neurologist wants to keep tabs on the headaches.”

“Have you had any lately?” Hannah asked, concerned.

“Not since that last flashback…if you could call it that.” She’d been here playing with Steffie and Sammy. All of a sudden, she’d had the vague memory of hanging baby clothes on a washline. Then she’d gotten a pounding headache. None of it made sense. If she was a virgin, she certainly didn’t have any children of her own. Maybe she’d worked for someone who’d had children.

“I’ll see you in the morning,” she said to Hannah as she brushed her hand tenderly once more over Steffie’s hair, then Sammy’s.

After Emma said goodbye to Aunt Gertie, she took her coat from the hall closet and went outside on the porch. Tucker was standing there waiting for her.

A few minutes later, he’d driven down Main Street past businesses and houses and finally fields when Emma asked, “What happened in there, Tucker?”

There was a pause. “I don’t know what you mean.”

“With Steffie. I noticed before when you came into the day-care center, you stayed away from the children.”

“You’re imagining things,” he said gruffly.

“I may have lost my memory, Tucker, but my eyesight is good. Don’t you like children?”

“Children are fine. I’m just not a…family man, that’s all.”

“Where is your family?” she probed, wanting to know more about him, wanting to know why he was so quiet sometimes, wanting to know why he was so strong.

“I don’t have any family.”

“Your parents are…gone?” she asked hesitantly.

He glanced at her and was silent for a few moments, but eventually answered, “My mother left my father and me when I was a kid. She didn’t like being married to a cop, and she wanted a different life than the one we had. She sent a few postcards and then we stopped hearing from her altogether.”

“And your dad?”

After a moment, he responded, “My dad died in the line of duty when I was at the police academy. I searched for my mother after that, found out she’d been in an automobile accident about three years before and didn’t make it.”

“I’m sorry, Tucker.”

He shrugged. “Life goes on.”

That sounded a little too glib to her and didn’t explain how he’d reacted to the children. But she could see he didn’t want to talk about it. He’d been so kind to her, so protective since that night when he’d taken her to the hospital, that she didn’t want to pry where she shouldn’t. “Aunt Gertie told me you’ve lived in Storkville about three years. Where did you live before that?”

With a frown, he cast a quick glance at her. “Why all the questions, Emma?”

She fiddled with her seat belt. “I need something to concentrate on. I can’t just sit here wondering what’s going to happen when we get to Omaha.”

He blew out a breath. “I see. I should have figured that out. I thought you might be asking because—Never mind, it doesn’t matter. Before I moved to Storkville, I lived in Chicago.”

“You were a member of the police force there?”

“Oh yeah.”

“So why’d you come to Storkville?”

His jaw tensed for a moment, then he replied, “I needed a change, and Storkville certainly was that. You’ve heard how it got its name, haven’t you?”

“No, I haven’t.”

“I don’t know how Gertie missed telling you that. Thirty-two years ago, a storm knocked out all the electricity in the town and there was a blackout that lasted quite a few days. Nine months later, a lot of babies were born. When the media in the surrounding areas heard about it, they dubbed the town Storkville. On the second year anniversary of the blackout, the town council officially renamed the town Storkville. Apparently there’s always been a lot of multiple births here. And Aunt Gertie gave the town its motto—When The Stork Visits Storkville, He Bestows Many Bouncing Bundles On Those Whose Love Is Boundless.”

“You sound as if you don’t believe that.”

“Some days I’m not sure what I believe.”

What had he seen, what had happened to persuade him to give up a life in Chicago and move here? But she knew he might not answer that question. So she asked another. “What made you become a police officer? Your dad?”

“I suppose. I said some days I don’t know what I believe, but that’s not quite true. My father taught me a code—a code of values, a code of behavior. He taught me right from wrong, and I saw him put it into practice. I never wanted to be anything else.”

“You’re a lucky man, Tucker.”

He gave her more than a glance this time. “Why?”

Their gazes held for a moment, then he looked back at the road. But she could tell he was intensely interested in her answer. “You had a good man for a father who taught you the basis of being an adult. It sounds as if you’ve always known who you are. You’re really blessed.”

The nerve in his jaw worked, and she had a feeling there was so much he hadn’t told her, so much he wouldn’t tell her. She went on, “Every minute of every day, I wonder who I am. I wonder what kind of parents I had. I wonder what they taught me and where I grew up and why I can’t remember any of it. The neurologist said traumatic amnesia is selective in a way. I’m not sure I understand what he means, but have I selected not to remember my parents, not to remember my upbringing?”

“Your amnesia could very well have a physical cause, too, and in about another half hour, you might know a whole lot more. How about some music? Will that distract you?”

She’d rather keep talking to him. She’d rather keep learning about what he thought and what he felt and why he considered their kiss a great big mistake. But she suspected he wouldn’t tell her that. She suspected he wouldn’t tell her a lot of things.

If Emma had ever been to Omaha, she couldn’t tell. None of it seemed familiar. Tucker knew exactly where he was going. When he parked near the police station, Emma took a deep breath.

He came around to her side of the truck and opened the door for her. His dark brown eyes stared down at her steadily. “Are you ready?”

She nodded and took the large hand he gave her to help her step down from the truck. His palm had calluses, and the heat from his fingers seemed to warm her down deep inside. She was glad he was here with her. She was glad she didn’t have to do this alone.

Tucker ushered her inside the six-story building where they were directed to Roy Compton’s office. A tall, broad-shouldered man opened the door, shook Tucker’s hand then hers, and introduced himself as Roy Compton. As soon as Emma stepped into his office, she was aware of another man also wearing a suit who had auburn hair, green eyes and looked to be in his fifties. She felt no flicker of recognition and her stomach somersaulted.

“Sheriff Malone, Emma, this is Robert Franz.”

It didn’t take long for a terribly disappointed look to come over the man’s face, then he shook his head. “She’s not my daughter. She’s not my Emma.”

Emma’s breath caught, her heart pounded. He didn’t know her. She might never find out who she was. But as soon as those thoughts clicked through her mind, she realized how distressed the man was, how agonizing this was for him. Without thinking twice, she crossed to him. “I’m sorry I’m not your daughter, Mr. Franz. I hope you find her. I hope you find her very soon.”

Robert Franz’s eyes grew moist. “I might never find her if she has anything to say about it. She thinks I want to run her life and she’s probably right.”

“But you’re her father and as the days go by, she’ll want that connection back. I know she will.”

Franz studied Emma and then nodded as if her words had given him some hope.

Although Tucker had been unsettled by Emma’s questions on the drive to Omaha, he realized her silence was just as disconcerting now. She wasn’t a silent woman and her quietness worried him. Even in the midst of her own situation, her own confusion, she’d reached out to a man she didn’t know to help him feel better. She was a special woman, a very young woman, probably in her early twenties. At thirty-seven, he felt a lifetime older than she was.

Emma’s silence lasted until they returned to Tucker’s house. He pulled into the garage next to his blue pickup truck. He should take it out for a run soon. He hadn’t started it in two days. But he wasn’t as concerned about his truck as he was about Emma. She’d stared into space on the drive home or out the window and he wished he could read the thoughts clicking through her head.

She climbed out of the SUV before he’d put the garage door down and started into the house. After he followed her, he found she’d thrown her coat over a stool at the counter and was washing her hands at the sink. “I’m going to make a meat loaf for supper and rice and green beans. I can whip up a batch of brownies for dessert if you’d like. It won’t take too long.”

Quickly she dried her hands, then moved to the refrigerator, taking out the ground beef. Her movements were almost frenetic, much too fast. She was hurrying and there was no reason to hurry.

“If you don’t feel like cooking,” he said, “I can go get some take-out. Do you like Chinese?”

“That won’t be necessary. I’ll have supper ready in an hour. Oh…maybe the meat loaf won’t be done by then. Would you like barbecued beef instead?”

As she talked and moved, Tucker knew he had to put a stop to it. Crossing the room, he blocked her path as she tried to make a return trip to the refrigerator. “Talk to me, Emma.”

“There’s nothing to talk about.”

“You’re upset.”

“Of course I’m upset, and that’s why I need to do something.”

She tried to go around him, but he caught her by the shoulders. “Stop.”

“Tucker, don’t,” she protested, her voice quivering. “I don’t want to think about what happened.”

“It could happen again. I might get another lead we have to chase down.”

Shaking her head, she tried to break free of his grasp. But he held her steady and, as he did, he saw tears come to her eyes.

“It’s okay, Emma. It’s okay to be disappointed and upset. I haven’t seen you cry since this whole thing happened. If anyone deserves to cry, you do.”

More tears welled in her eyes and spilled over, and he couldn’t help but fold his arms around her and hold her close.

She held on to him.

He let his cheek rest against her hair. Everything about her was so feminine…so tempting…so vulnerable. What had been a comforting embrace became more for Tucker. Her hair against his jaw was as arousing as her soft breasts pressed against his chest. The desire that rolled through him whenever he saw her, let alone whenever he touched her, became a rush of heat throughout his body, inflaming his hunger for her. But she needed him right now and no woman had needed him in just this way for a very long time.

“We’ll find out who you are. I’ve sent more inquiries to South Dakota and Wyoming, and I’ll do it across the country if I have to.” He rubbed his hand up and down her back. “And maybe you’ll have more flashbacks. You’re seeing the doctor tomorrow, aren’t you?”

She leaned away from him slightly and nodded. “It was just looking into Mr. Franz’s eyes that upset me. I wondered if anybody missed me that badly. But certainly they would have come looking for me if they had.”

“I’m sure someone misses you, Emma. A great deal.” Her upturned chin, her sparkling green eyes, the innocence he saw every time he looked at her, convinced him someone had to miss her tremendously.

“Thank you for being with me today, Tucker. Sometimes I feel as if I can handle anything—who I am, what I did, where I lived. I believe I’ll find out any hour, any day. But then others—It was good to have you there.”

“I don’t need your thanks. I was doing my job.” But as he said it, he knew that wasn’t entirely true. Emma had become more than his job, and that was the problem.

“Do you become this personally involved with all the people you help?” she asked.

His answer would be a catch-22. He’d be in trouble either way. “I do what I have to do.”

“But what do you want to do, Tucker?”

It was as if she knew everything in him was screaming at him to kiss her, to hold her in his arms more intimately, to give them both pleasure. But just because he’d given in to that impulse once, didn’t mean he was going to give in again. His father had taught him discipline, and he’d honed it on his own over the years. It was a necessary trait in law enforcement. It was a necessary trait when a man held a vulnerable woman in his arms.

“I want to find out who you are, and I want to return you to wherever you belong,” he answered her.

The startled look in her eyes became a hurt one. Pulling free of his arms, she straightened her shoulders. “I’m fine now. As you said, I have to get used to this type of thing happening…and I will. I’m not going to give up on finding out who I am anymore than you are. Maybe that’s the problem. I haven’t tried hard enough. I’ll talk to the doctor about it tomorrow. Maybe I should even go door to door throughout Storkville, asking anyone and everyone if they’ve ever seen me. I had to be here for some reason. Someone should know me.”

That’s exactly what Tucker thought. But Emma’s story had been in the Storkville paper and no one had come forward. Apparently no one was missing this beautiful young woman.

And Tucker wondered why.

The next morning Tucker was gone when Emma went down to the kitchen. She was relieved in a way, yet disappointed, too. Last night when he’d held her, she’d felt so secure, so safe. Being in his arms felt so right. But obviously he didn’t feel the same way. She’d thought he was going to kiss her again. Apparently he was just giving her comfort, just doing part of his job. Yet she couldn’t believe that the golden sparks in his dark brown eyes had been simply duty.

In the few days she’d been with him here in his house, she’d learned he was a complicated man. He’d worked in his den last night until supper. Then after supper, during which she hadn’t said much at all, he’d gone back to his office at the sheriff’s department. She’d gone to bed around ten and heard him come in shortly after. His room was next door to hers, and she could hear the clang of his belt as he undressed, his boots falling onto the floor. She could even hear the creak of his bed as he got in.

She didn’t know who she was, yet she was having these thoughts about a man she barely knew. She shook her head. Maybe the two went together. Maybe her thoughts were swirling around Tucker because he was the only stable person in her world right now.

After she nibbled on a piece of toast and drank a cup of tea, she walked the four blocks to the day-care center. When she’d first moved in, Tucker had wanted to drive her there in the mornings. But she liked walking in the crisp, cool air. She liked the quiet. She liked passing the people in the houses on the street. Every time she took the walk, she hoped something would trigger her memory.

As always, when Emma arrived at the day-care center, it bustled with activity as parents dropped off their children for the day. Emma helped them with their coats and then took them to play stations or the breakfast corner. Every chance she got, she played with Sammy and Steffie. Sometimes when she held them…she felt on the verge of remembering. But then afterwards she told herself she was being silly. She must just love babies.

The morning sped by and soon it was time to serve lunch. Emma worked beside Hannah and two other volunteers. “Gwen called this morning to let me know that she wouldn’t be in,” Hannah told her as she poured juice.

“How’s she feeling?” Gwen had come to Storkville, trying to escape the effects of a difficult divorce. She’d been pregnant and just wanted some peace and quiet. Instead she’d fallen in love with Ben Crowe and married him.

“Her doctor told her she could deliver anytime, so she’s sticking close to Ben and he’s sticking close to her. He probably won’t let her out of his sight for very long.”

Emma laughed. “Is he the protective type?”

“Very. Even more so than Jackson, and Jackson and I have go-rounds about it now and then.”

Hannah herself had just married in September to Jackson Caldwell. He was a pediatrician and the son of Jackson Caldwell Sr., who had been one of the wealthiest men in Storkville. Jackson had returned to the town when his father died six months ago. He and Hannah had the type of marriage that Emma admired. Anyone a mile away could see how much in love they were.

As soon as Hannah finished pouring juice, she and Emma served the children lunch. As usual there were spills and giggles, faces to be wiped, and energy to direct. It was almost three when Emma glanced at her watch and checked in with Hannah again.

“I’m going to spend a few minutes with Sammy and Steffie and then I’ll have to leave.”

“That’s fine. Penny Sue will be coming in. You know, it’s okay if you take a day off now and then. You don’t have to come in every day.”

“Nothing else seems quite as worthwhile as coming here and helping you.”

Fifteen minutes later, Emma was sitting on the floor, holding Steffie and watching Sammy awkwardly push a walking toy in the shape of a train engine. He wasn’t taking steps on his own yet, but it wouldn’t be long. He’d just fallen and was deciding whether to cry or laugh when Tucker suddenly towered above them.

“I came to take you to your doctor’s appointment.”

“I can walk, Tucker. It’s only a few blocks. You didn’t have to interrupt your work.”

“You’re part of my work,” he said briskly.

She wished that weren’t so. She wished he’d come to drive her simply because he wanted to. “We have a few minutes before my appointment. There’s coffee in the kitchen if you want some. I’ll get the twins busy with something in the playpen and then we can go.”

Tucker looked down at the floor at Sammy and then at Steffie in Emma’s arms. “Right. A cup of coffee would be good. Come get me when you’re ready to leave.”

As Emma watched him walk away, she again wondered what made him so uncomfortable being in the midst of children. She vowed to herself she’d find out what it was.

Soon.

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