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Snowkissed
‘She told me she wished there had been repercussions. That if she’d ended up inside it would have been better for her than her life now.’
Ruby’s voice was sad and heavy with knowledge.
‘I don’t blame her for having that knife. Her home life makes mine look like a picnic in the park. Her dad is a violent loser and she is so damaged no carer can cope. That’s why she’s in a residential home. That’s why she reacted to Max like that—he was in her space and she panicked. Oddly enough after the incident Max tried to befriend her.’ She glanced at him. ‘Your doing?’
‘I did talk to him.’ He had tried to tell him there were other ways—told him that there were consequences to actions.
‘That’s fab, Ethan. Maybe they can help each other. I hope they’ll all come back in September. Once they let their guard down they were all so full of potential—I mean, did you see them after surfing? They had a blast.’
So had he. All the teenagers had been stoked to be in the water and he’d watched them—some of them carbon copies of himself and Rafael. Tough...so tough...and always out to prove it. Because if they didn’t there was the fear of being taken down. All swagger, all bravado—but up against the waves, up against the spray and the sea salt, they had met an element stronger than themselves that they could challenge with impunity. And they’d loved it. Enough, he hoped, to incentivise them to keep out of trouble until September.
A soft sigh escaped her lips. ‘I wish... I wish I could help. Take them all in and house the lot of them.’ She placed her empty plate down with a thunk. ‘Maybe one day I will. No—not maybe. Definitely.’
‘How are you going to do that?’
Her chin tilted. ‘I’m going to adopt,’ she said. ‘That’s my single parenthood plan.’
Maybe it shouldn’t surprise him—after all, Ruby had been in care and he understood why she would want to help children like the child she had been. Hey, he wanted to do that. But adoption by herself...
Her eyes narrowed. ‘You don’t think it’s a good plan?’
‘I didn’t say that.’
‘Then what? You think I can’t hack it?’
‘I didn’t say that either.’
‘Then say something. What do you think?’
‘I think it’s a very, very big thing to take on.’ He raised a hand. ‘I’m not saying you couldn’t do it. I think you would be a fantastic person for any kid to have in their lives.’ And he meant that—he’d seen the way she’d interacted with all the kids, seen her capacity for care and love. ‘But taking on older children... It’s a huge commitment—especially on your own.’
‘I know that.’
There was no uncertainty in her voice and he couldn’t help but wonder at the depth of her need to do this even as he admired her confidence in herself. The idea of anybody—let alone a child...let alone a child who had already been through the system—being dependent on him for their well-being made his veins freeze over. To those kids Ruby would be their salvation, and he knew that saving wasn’t part of his make-up.
But concern still niggled. ‘You said you’d decided on single parenthood because you can’t pick good father material. Don’t you think you should rethink that strategy?’
‘What do you mean?’
‘I mean why not open yourself up to the idea of a relationship? Find a man who will support you emotionally and be a great father to your family. You’re too young to give up on having love and a family.’
‘You have,’ she pointed out.
‘That’s because I don’t want love or a family. You can’t give up on something you’ve never wanted in the first place. You do want love—you’d never have been sucked in by Hugh or those other two losers otherwise.’
‘See?’ Tucking her legs beneath her, she jabbed her finger at him. ‘That’s exactly it. Three out of three losers. That’s a one hundred per cent miss rate. I can’t risk what is most important to me—having a family—by taking a side quest for love. Plus, if I pick wrong it could have a terrible effect on any children. I need to stay focused on my ultimate goal. I thought you of all people would get that. You want Caversham world domination and I want children. I won’t be sidelined by anything else.’
Well, what could he say to that?
‘I can see the “but” written all over your face, Ethan. I know it will be tough but it will be incredibly worthwhile.’ The finality in her tone suggested that any argument would be futile. ‘Like these past two days have been.’
‘Two days is one thing. A lifetime is another.’
He pressed his lips together. Ruby was right—she had her goal and he had his, and hers was none of his business. What did he know? It was not as if he thought love was a good idea, so why push Ruby towards it? He didn’t want the bright light of hope to be extinguished from those eyes by some idiot. But that wasn’t his problem or his decision to make—it was Ruby’s. So...
‘You’re right I think the past two days were a success—and a lot of that is thanks to you. The tree, the gifts, the food...and the karaoke carols were superb. You did a great job.’
Relief touched her face at the change of subject and he wondered if she regretted telling him of her plans.
‘So did you. Thanks muchly. And thanks for letting me be part of it.’ A glance at her watch and she straightened up in the chair. ‘Right. I’ll start the clear-up procedure and then I’ll be on my way. Leave you to your Christmas plans.’
Her voice was a smidge too breezy, and her eyes flicked away from his as she rose to her feet.
‘Don’t worry about clearing up,’ he said as he stood, his eyes fixed on her expression. ‘You’ve already spent so much time and effort on this—I want you to start your break as soon as possible.’
Deliberately casual, he stepped towards her.
‘Where did you say you were going, again?’
‘Um...’ For a heartbeat she twisted her finger into a stray curl, then met his gaze with cool aplomb. ‘I didn’t.’ As she moved towards the door she gave him a small smile. ‘Any more than you shared your plans.’
Her pace increased to escape speed and instantly he moved to bar her path.
‘That’s easily remedied. My plan is to stay here.’
Surprise skittered across her face. ‘Alone?’
‘Yup. My original plan was to host the teens over Christmas—when that changed I didn’t bother making different plans for Christmas Day. It’s just another day, after all. But I know you don’t agree with that. So what are your plans, Ruby?’
Her eyes narrowed slightly as she realised she’d walked straight into that. ‘I... Look, why does it matter to you?’
‘Because you have worked so hard, and made such a difference to those teenagers—I don’t want to think that doing that has ruined your plans.’
‘Oh. It hasn’t. Truly.’ A gust escaped her lips as he raised his eyebrows. ‘You aren’t going to let up, are you? Look, I haven’t got any specific plans. I never did.’
A slight look of surprise tilted her features.
‘It’s odd, actually. My original plan was to shut myself away with some weepie movies and a vat of ice cream. But now I don’t want to do that. In fact if I wanted to I could go out and paint the town red. Since your press release lots of people who had dropped me like the proverbial hot root vegetable are now keen to be my friend again. Or I could probably even rustle up an invite from a real friend. But I don’t really want to do any of that either. So I think I’ll just head home and use the time to relax. Read a book. Watch some sappy Christmas movies.’
Ever so slowly she started to edge around him for the door.
‘Not so fast.’ The idea flashed into his mind like a lightning bolt, zigzagged around and sparked a mad impulse. ‘I have a better idea.’
‘What?’
‘Let’s go away for Christmas.’
‘Who? You and me?’ Incredulity widened her eyes—clearly the idea was risible.
‘Yup. We’ve worked incredibly hard and we deserve a break. You said you wanted snow—how about the Alps?’
The realisation that he was making this up as he went along triggered a ring tone of alarm.
‘Are you serious?’
For a second excitement lit her blue eyes and Ethan ignored the warning blare of instinct—the reminder that mad impulses never ended well.
‘Of course I’m serious. Why wouldn’t I be?’
‘Because... Well... We can’t just up and leave.’
‘Last time I looked I was the boss and I say we can.’
The idea gave him a sudden surge of exhilaration—the kind he usually felt on a surfboard. It morphed into a mad desire to take her hands and twirl her round the room. Which was every kind of nutty—from peanuts to Brazil. Rein it in, Ethan. What exactly was he suggesting, here?
Welcome rationalisation kicked in. ‘I’d like to check out the Alps anyway—as a possible Caversham location.’
‘But you haven’t even opened the castle yet.’
Ethan shrugged. ‘Gotta keep on moving, Ruby. I told you I want to make it big, and momentum is key.’
Plus, it made sense—it would make this a business trip and not a mad impulse at all. With any luck he’d get there, feel the buzz of a new venture—and the odd, unwanted emotions that Ruby stirred within him would dissipate. Come to that, once the ball was over—which was a few scant days away—he wouldn’t need to spend as much time here. He’d see Ruby less, and his life would regain its status quo.
‘So what do you think? Shall we go and get a feel for the place?’
Ruby wasn’t sure she could think. Or at least think straight. His idea had conjured up cosy warm scenes. Snow, mountain peaks, magical Christmas card scenery... Ethan and Ruby walking hand in hand...
As if.
Ruby hauled in a breath and instructed her brain to think, to oust the temptation that had slunk to the table—a late and uninvited guest at negotiations. Ethan had probably never held hands with anyone in his life, and the very fact that the picture had formed in her mind meant she needed to be on her guard.
In fact... ‘It’s a crazy idea.’
‘Why? We both deserve a break. I have a good gut feeling about the Alps as a Caversham location, you’ve done a lot of research into the Caversham ethos, and I’d value a second opinion from you.’
It all sounded so reasonable. His words slipped into her consciousness like honey. From a professional viewpoint her boss had asked her to go on a business trip. It was a no-brainer.
Plus, if she said no would he take someone else? A sudden vision of gorgeous blondes and curvy brunettes paraded in her brain and her nails scored into her palm in instinctive recoil.
‘I think it sounds fabulous. Let’s do it.’
Temptation gave a smug smile of victory and panic assailed her nerves. Because all of a sudden thrills of anticipation shot through her veins. Chill, Ruby. Who wouldn’t look forward to Christmas in the Alps? Obviously those little pulse-buzzes had zilch to do with the prospect of one-on-one time with Ethan. Because that would be personal. To say nothing of certifiably stupid.
Ethan nodded, his expression inscrutable. ‘Okay. I’ll check flights and we’ll take the first available one.’
‘Fantastic.’
Though it occurred to Ruby that this whole idea could be better filed under ‘Terminally Stupid’.
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