A Case for Forgiveness

“No, I...no idea...”

“I really hope he’s all right, Shay. You know I love him, too.”

“I do know that, Hannah.” The entire James family adored Caleb.

“So, how did it go when you saw Jonah? Was there weirdness? Or was it like old times?”

“Okay, Hannah, you’re my sister and I love you, but can we not talk about this? About Jonah? I’m anxious for Jonah to call, but it’s only because I’m waiting for some news about Caleb—”

Hannah interrupted, “I can help you there.” Hannah held up her phone so Shay could see the display. “Jonah is at the Cozy Caribou having breakfast right now with Bering and some of the guys. So, I’m guessing that Caleb must be fine or else Jonah wouldn’t be...”

Every vein in Shay’s body seemed to throb at once. Jonah had said that he would call her after Caleb met with Doc, but he was hanging out at the Cozy Caribou instead? Having breakfast? No doubt chowing down on a pile of biscuits and gravy. How was she supposed to help him if he didn’t keep her informed? Why had she been so foolish as to think that he had changed even one bit in this selfish regard?

Shay stood up. “I have to go. Can you handle things while I’m gone?”

Hannah nodded. “Sure. Go kick some lawyer butt. But before you go—that Adele person called again.”

“Adele?”

“Yep.” Hannah looked down at the paper in front of her. “She called last night, too—twice. I told you.”

Shay shook her head, vaguely recalling the conversation. She’d been so distracted after the evening at Caleb’s she didn’t remember the details. “Did you get any details?”

“I tried, but she said she only wanted to talk to you. She said it was very important.”

“I don’t know anyone named Adele. Did she say what it was about?”

“Nope, but I think she’s from Utah. I recognize the area code.”

Hannah would recognize the area code for Utah—she’d spent a lot of time there in her ski-training days. Probably something to do with a reservation. Shay was continually surprised by how often guests thought only the manager could handle their special requests.

“Can you put her name and number on my desk? I’ll call her back later. I don’t have time right now.”

“Will do, but when you get back we need to talk about the staffing issues in the restaurant.”

“Have you had a chance to look over the applicants for the server positions?”

Hannah grimaced. “I have, but there’s not a lot to choose from there. Kyla Randle applied, but we know she was fired from the Cozy Caribou for stealing from the till. Randy Baxter applied, but Shay, he hasn’t showered in three years. There are a few other applicants with literally no experience and/or dicey references—Crystal Scower is a known meth dealer from Glacier City and this other guy who just got out of jail because of some brutal animal cruelty charges.”

“Nope. No way on that last one. I’d rather hire the drug user—but seriously, her name is Crystal and she deals meth?”

“Yes, and I agree—you know what Agnes used to say—if a person isn’t kind to animals then there can’t be much for kindness in there at all.”

“That’s the truth. We’re having open interviews on Friday, so maybe someone will show up then.”

Hannah looked doubtful and Shay felt the same. This was a problem. She was also short at least one more maid and a front desk person. But the restaurant was the most pressing problem. She and Hannah were picking up the slack, but it was becoming increasingly difficult with the tourist season officially upon them.

Shay had not only expanded and remodeled the dining room; she’d hired a professionally trained chef, Javier, who had overhauled the menu. Shay had been skeptical when Javier had introduced a few of the dishes—like honey-glazed salmon and halibut with mango chutney. She would have lost a lot of money betting that the men in this town would never eat “fish with jam,” as her friend Cricket Blackburn had taken to calling the dish.

The Faraway Restaurant was now quite a bit more upscale than Rankins’ other two eateries—the Cozy Caribou and the Top Rock Café. This didn’t include the Donut Den, but her sugar-addicted cousin-in-law Emily was the only person she knew who considered a donut a proper dinner.

Shay hadn’t realized there were quite so many people in Rankins hankering for a fine dining experience. Well, fine dining Rankins-style consisted mainly of changing out of your work clothes before grabbing a bite, but still the restaurant was filling a niche she hadn’t expected.

“Don’t worry—we will figure this out. I need to go, so let’s recap quickly—what are you going to do with the fish if Mr. Takagi shows up?”

Hannah looked skyward and slowly tapped a pink-polished fingertip to her pursed lips before pointing it at Shay. “Lightly bread and panfry?”

“Hannah—”

“Shay, chill—seriously, you need to lighten up. I’ve got this. You can leave the expensive lipstick-kissed koi in my capable hands.”

Shay wasn’t so sure about that, but she picked up her bag and headed out of her office. She had more important matters to attend to, because family trumped everything in her life—even the inn. And she considered Caleb family, so if Jonah thought she hadn’t been thrilled with him last night...well, then he hadn’t seen anything yet.

CHAPTER THREE

THE SUN SHONE bright amongst a smattering of high, fluffy clouds and from the Faraway Inn’s ridge-top location Shay could see the entire town of Rankins below. The Cozy Caribou’s distinctive red roof stood out like a beacon in the heart of its quaint downtown. Normally, on a day like this, she’d soak in the sight, be grateful for the sheer beauty of this place she was lucky enough to call home—but not this morning. Because now, instead of the lovely view and the drive down the hill calming her anger, the time only managed to rile her further.

Breakfast? With his buddies? Shay felt her blood pressure spike anew. Jonah had said he would call her as soon as he learned anything, but he had opted for breakfast instead? Unbelievable...

Shay marched into the Caribou, her eyes sweeping the place until they latched on to the table where Jonah sat, sure enough, shooting the breeze with a bunch of his old compadres—Bering, Cricket Blackburn, Gary Watte, Steve Howard and—Tag? That was a surprise. Could her big brother finally have let go of his animosity toward Jonah? It seemed unlikely. Like her, he’d probably been blindsided. Unlike her, he was too polite to make a scene.

As she headed toward the table, she heard a few greetings and comments in her periphery. She offered only quick replies.

Jonah jumped up from the table as she approached. “Shay, I was going to—”

The table went silent as she interrupted smoothly, “Can I talk to you for a minute?”

“I—”

“In private.”

All eyes were on her, every mouth shut. Tag asked a question with his eyes and Shay conveyed with a look that yes, she was fine.

Jonah nodded.

She pivoted and headed toward the back of the restaurant and into the area that served as a bar in the afternoons and evenings. The section was closed now and darker than usual in the normally bright space, but she could feel that Jonah was close behind her. Maddening how she still felt so much where he was concerned.

When she was sure they were out of earshot she turned and faced him. “Well?”

“Shay, calm down. I—”

“Calm down? Why wouldn’t I be calm, Jonah? Oh, right, because you’re here eating breakfast with your old posse while I’m up at the inn, concerned and waiting for you to call me with news about your grandfather?”

He opened his mouth but she began firing off more words before he could respond. “Look at me.” She pointed at her face. “See these bags under my eyes? That’s because I barely slept last night. The inn is crazy busy, I’m short-staffed, and I have a guest bringing in valuable live koi that we have promised to take care of—but none of that really matters to me right now, Jonah, because I am worried about Caleb. You remember him? Your grandfather? The man who, outside of my own father and possibly my brothers, is the single most important man to me in the entire world.”

“Did you say koi?” Amusement danced across his face and that spiked a fresh surge of annoyance.

“Yes,” she snapped. He didn’t deserve an explanation.

“Okay... Shay, listen—I was going to call you, but I left my phone—”

She tipped her head down and tapped on her forehead, trying to rein in her temper. “Just tell me what Doc said. That’s all I really want to know anyway.”

“He didn’t say anything definitive. He is sending Gramps to a specialist. His appointment is in three weeks.”

Her eyes shifted upward, connecting with his. “A specialist? What kind of specialist?”

“A cardiologist in Anchorage.”

“A cardiologist? What...? He doesn’t have a heart condition, or any family history of heart disease.” She didn’t care that she was informing him of this like he didn’t already know his own grandfather.

“He had some abnormal test results and Doc wants Gramps to follow up with a doctor in Anchorage.”

“What tests? And you didn’t think this was important enough to share with me? After you specifically asked me yesterday to help you out with this? We were going to be a ‘we’ where your gramps is concerned. Isn’t that what you said?”

Jonah stared into her eyes, and even in the dim light she could see the intensity shooting from their depths—pleading with her to listen. And there was some anger there, too, which she didn’t think she deserved, although she supposed she could dial it down a bit. She’d clearly gotten her message across.

She remained silent, waiting for his explanation.

“Yes, that is what I said. And that is what I want. Shay, I am sorry. I was on my way to see you... When we got home Gramps went into his room to take a nap. So I decided to jog up to the inn and talk to you in person.”

“A nap?” Shay repeated. “Caleb doesn’t nap.”

He pointed at his shoes.

Her eyes drifted down, taking in Jonah’s faded Yale blue t-shirt, gray shorts—and running shoes.

“I was doing that very thing when Bering pulled up behind me, stopped his pickup, and asked if I’d like to join him and some of the guys for breakfast. I agreed, thinking that I’d give you a call on the way over, but Bering didn’t have his phone with him. I’d left my cell phone behind—I don’t like to take it when I run—back in Chicago it’s the only time I have any peace. But, I was going to call you—” he paused and lifted one hand that held a phone, pointing at it with the other “—with Cricket’s phone.”

Shay stayed silent and admitted to herself that this all seemed plausible. The men in this town liked to gather together any chance they had—in packs—like playful dogs.

“I am sorry, okay? This town... It makes me crazy... How did you even know I was here anyway? I’ve only been in the place for maybe fifteen minutes—I haven’t even got my breakfast yet.”

Shay felt her temper deflating slowly like a sad helium balloon. “Okay. I know what it can be like here, with the gossip sometimes, and—”

“No, I should have called you—immediately. I forgot what this town can be like.”

Small-town life was something that had always bothered Jonah. Shay didn’t like the gossip either, hated when it turned cruel or nasty, but she loved this town, loved the support. The strong sense of community in Rankins was constant—something she felt all the time. She thrived on that—giving it as well as getting it. And knowing she could count on that support comforted her like a warm blanket.

“Do you forgive me?”

She exhaled a tired breath. “Yes, of course. And I’m sorry, too. I just want to figure out what’s going on with your gramps. This is really scaring me.”

His hand came up toward her shoulder and Shay anticipated his touch. But he lowered his arm instead, tucking the hand into his pocket.

“So, you’re admitting that you lost your temper?”

“Don’t push it, Jonah.”

He was grinning at her and Shay wished he would stop. A grinning Jonah had gotten her into deep trouble once upon a time. She immediately banished the memories.

If she were honest with herself, she knew she was going to be facing this situation with Caleb on her own now, at least until he consulted with the heart specialist.

Her brain began buzzing with possibilities, some of which she voiced aloud. “So, when are you returning to Chicago? Will you fly back and meet us in Anchorage for the appointment? I’ll have Tag fly us—or Cricket if need be. Do you think I should stay with Caleb at the house until then?”

“No, actually, um...I’m not leaving.”

“What?”

“Remember I told you last night that Gramps had something he wanted to talk to me about?”

“Yes.”

“Apparently there are some issues with his practice, too.”

That knocked her back for a moment. “With his practice? What kind of issues?”

“He has quite a backlog of work and he’s asked me if I could take a look at some cases while I’m here. Help him sort through them and catch up. So I figure I’ll be here at least another month.”

Shay frowned. They both knew that Caleb was meticulous where his practice was concerned. “A backlog? I don’t know anything about this either. I could have found someone to help him. I’ve told him for years he needs to hire a paralegal. And I love Betty, but she’s not a paralegal. Don’t get me wrong—she’s a great typist who knows her way around a legal document, but a paralegal could give him a hand with some of the more technical stuff.”

Jonah took a step closer and lowered his voice. Shay knew he would never want anyone to hear them talking about Gramps not being on top of his game.

“I had a quick look last night. It’s kind of odd because some things are absolutely perfect—classic Caleb Cedar legal perfection. But then, there are others that are just a mess.”

Shay tried to wrap her brain around what he was telling her. Caleb mentioned cutting back once in a while, spending more time fishing and less time “fiddling with the law,” as he liked to refer to his practice, but she knew he’d never really retire. He loved the law as much as Jonah did.

He’d been so proud when Jonah had chosen to follow in his footsteps, and he’d been downright giddy when Jonah had been accepted to Yale, his alma mater. Ironic that it was one of Caleb’s proudest moments that had marked the beginning of the end of her and Jonah’s relationship.

Still, one of the biggest differences in her mind between Caleb and Jonah was that Caleb loved other things, too, besides the law—and not just things that could be bought. Caleb loved life.

“So...maybe he is feeling worse than he’s been letting on. What should we do?”

Jonah raised a hand and squeezed the back of his neck.

His movement combined with her own ill-timed inhale resulted in a blast from the Jonah-scented past. He smelled like citrus and sweat and cedar trees. Bittersweet memories stabbed her in the chest—the pain located right in the middle of her heart. She squeezed her eyes shut and Jonah mistook the action.

“Hey, I’m worried, too. But I don’t think there’s much we can do until we know more—other than keep an eye on him, right?”

She opened her eyes. “And I think it’s important for us to stay positive, because although he says he’s fine—this still has to be scary—even for someone as strong as your gramps. My mom went through some of this last year—heart attack and then bypass surgery. It was terrifying.”

Jonah nodded. “Thank you, Shay. I can’t tell you how much this means to me. Your help and everything you do for him... I—”

Shay wondered...did he just not hear the me’s and I’s?

“—know this isn’t about me. You love Gramps as much as I do. And he loves you—probably more than he does me. Hell, you certainly deserve his love more than I do.”

Well, she thought as her eyes traveled up to meet his again, that statement was a nice surprise, and strengthened her hope that he shared her level of concern.

Jonah’s lips turned up into a grin, one side higher than the other. Her stomach tightened and then stirred with anxiety, because he was reminding her too much of the boy she fell in love with—too much of the man she used to love. Too much...Old Jonah.

“That’s not true, Jonah. It’s that I’m the one who’s here.” She broke eye contact and tried to focus on the giant moose rack hanging on the wall behind him. “We’ll figure this out. I’m not going anywhere—you know that.”

His eyes somehow lured hers back in again. But now they were hard and flat and she was a little startled by the change in his expression.

“Yeah, that much I do know, Shay. I learned that a long time ago—the hard way.”

His tone was bland, but she felt the words like a sharp bite. She took a step back—his bitterness toward her a welcome reminder that she was bitter, too.

Goodbye fond memories and heavenly man-scent and good riddance. He blamed her and she blamed him. That was it, in a nutshell, and she certainly was in no mood to rehash old relationship issues that would never—could never—be solved.

She sighed. “Whatever, Jonah—let’s just stay focused on your gramps, okay? Your breakfast is probably getting cold, so I’ll let you get to it. I have to be back at the inn anyway. You’re bringing Gramps to bingo, right?”

“Oh, yeah, I can’t think of anything I’d rather do with my time than play bingo. Gramps said the entire town is atwitter with talk of the record-breaking jackpot.” His mocking pretty well summed up his feelings about Rankins. “And, gosh, there are hundreds of dollars in prizes.” He worked in one of his eye-snaps. “Does he not know how long it takes me to make hundreds of dollars back in Chicago? A matter of minutes. Bingo isn’t exactly my thing, Shay.”

Shay’s jaw fell open. “Jonah, sometimes people just do things because they’re fun, without giving a thought to much else. People enjoy spending time together for the sake of nothing more than that. You’ve been in town for about twenty minutes and you can’t at least go along and pretend to enjoy something—for your gramps’s sake? Did you know your gramps never even keeps his winnings? He always donates them back to whatever cause is being played for.”

“I...” He let out a frustrated groan. “That really did sound bad, didn’t it?”

“Yes, it did.”

“I’m just... I’m out of my league here, Shay.”

Out of his league?

“You grew up in this league, Jonah, remember? And you used to kind of like it. At the very least—you liked some of the people. And you know what? Many of those people still think highly of you and some of them consider you a friend, although why that is I don’t know because I’m almost positive you don’t deserve it. But right now there’s a whole table of them waiting to have breakfast with you, so before you head back there, you might want to rethink that condescending attitude. People will catch on, Jonah. And they won’t like it.”

She turned to leave.

“Shay, wait.” Now he did touch her, reaching out and grabbing her elbow, but she had no problem shrugging him off this time.

He pushed his fingers through his wavy black hair, making it look messy and frustrated, like she felt.

“Look, you’re right. I’m sorry. It’s not that I think I’m better, it’s just being here again—like this...it makes me feel off-balance.” He inhaled a deep breath and then exhaled a sigh. “Of course I’ll go. Gramps is excited about it.”

Shay watched him, waiting. It was a pretty good apology, but... “And...?” she drawled.

He grinned—a sheepish, boyish grin and she had to resist its sneaky attempt to sweeten her mood.

“And, I will have a good attitude. I will do my best to have fun at bingo with Gramps.”

She gave him a short, single nod of satisfaction. “Good. I’ll see you there.”

* * *

“THAT WAS A terrible cast.” Doc clucked his tongue, his lips twitching in amusement.

Caleb yanked on his fishing pole. “Don’t you think I know that? That’s why I’m reeling back in.”

Doc chuckled. “Okay, don’t get all riled up now. But you are a little off your game—you have to admit that. This is the third time you’ve casted and that last one only went about four feet. You sure you’re all right?”

“Yes,” Caleb snapped, “for the third time. I feel fine.”

“I’m not talking about your health. Is something else bothering you?”

“Something besides this piece-of-junk reel my best friend gave me for my birthday, you mean? No.”

“That’s operator error where that expensive, state-of-the-art reel is concerned and you know it.”

Caleb snorted.

Doc executed a perfect cast. “You’re positive? Nothing is bothering you?”

“That’s what I said.”

“That’s your official statement? You’re ready to sign it?”

Caleb moved to face him. “Doc, you been nipping at the schnapps already this morning? It’s not even close to noon yet, and that would be early even for you. If you’ve got something on your mind I wish you would spit it out. I feel like I’m sparring with a cagey client here—and I’m not working today, remember?”

“That reminds me—how did you get out of the house? Where did you tell Jonah you were going?”

“I told him I needed a nap, asked him to turn off the phone and not bother me before noon. Then I climbed out the window.”

Doc belted out a laugh as he slowly worked the lure toward the boat. “You climbed out the window?”

“Yep.” Caleb’s lips curled up with the threat of a smile.

“Till noon, huh? That’s not a nap, that’s a whole night’s sleep.”

“You know I’m not a napper, Doc. Why don’t you tell me how long they usually last?” Caleb bit his line in two and stowed the flasher along with the lure he’d been using in the tackle box.

Doc shrugged. “Mine are usually an hour or two at the most. But let’s get back on track here.”

“I didn’t know we were off of it.”

“So, you’re not feeling the slightest bit guilty?”

Caleb didn’t answer and Doc finally, blessedly, remained silent as he shifted things around in his tackle box.

All that could be heard was the soft lapping of the water against the side of the boat. An eagle sailed overhead and they both looked skyward to watch it. Caleb didn’t know a soul who could stop themselves from pausing to watch a bald eagle fly by. Then he tied a favorite lure to the end of his line.

Eventually he answered, his tone taking a serious turn. “It doesn’t matter. I’m committed. There’s no turning back now.”

“Well, I don’t like it, Caleb. I’m feeling guilty. It’s dishonest, and I’m not a dishonest person.”

“What have you done to feel guilty about?”

“Besides lying to Jonah about what we’re up to today?” Doc fiddled with his own reel for a few seconds and then, instead of casting again, he laid the pole across his thighs. He leaned his head back and stared up at the clouds.

Caleb followed his gaze and marveled at the luscious blue of the sky. Alaska in the summertime, he thought, as he let the sheer beauty of it soak into him—there was nothing like it in the entire world. He used to take weeks off every summer so he and Jonah could enjoy as much of it as possible.

Jonah used to love summers here—fishing, hiking, biking, exploring...surely, being in Rankins now would make him realize how much. And hopefully before this thing was through his grandson would realize some other things, as well.

“Shay,” Doc muttered. “That’s the thing. That’s what I feel bad about. I understand what you’re trying to accomplish as far as Jonah is concerned, but I feel guilty about deceiving Shay. I didn’t think that through when I agreed to this. At the risk of waxing poetic—that woman is a shining example of all that is right with this town. She doesn’t deserve to be dragged into this. And I don’t like being a part of causing her any more pain.”

“Yep, she is a shining example. And, yes,” Caleb confessed, “I’ll admit that has been poking at me a bit, too. But I’m not doing it on purpose, Doc. That girl is like my own granddaughter. I promised Gus if anything ever happened to him that I would watch out for her.” Emotion clogged Caleb’s chest.