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Wedding Promises
‘Sure.’ Iona laughed. ‘Well, everyone has to start somewhere.’
‘And those without the talent stay there,’ Caitlin finished, sending a ripple of amusement through the crowd.
‘It was sad, really,’ Melissa said. ‘She must have been quite beautiful once, I suppose. But you know how older women get sometimes, when they’re worried about being left on the shelf, or can’t find satisfaction in their marriage. They start running after everything that moves, no matter how ridiculous they look. She even went after your own boyfriend once, didn’t she, Eloise? And got him too, as I recall.’ She shook her head. ‘Poor woman; she clearly had issues.’ As if that false sympathy, tacked on the end, somehow made up for the fact that she was trashing Eloise’s mother’s name—and Eloise’s reputation at the same time.
‘Does Noah know about your family tendency to seduce co-stars?’ Melissa turned her most innocent smile and wide eyes on Eloise.
Eloise couldn’t take it any more. ‘Melissa, could I please have a word with you outside?’ she ground out between clenched teeth.
‘But darling! We’re all having so much fun here!’
‘I just remembered something about the arrangements for the...ah...photo shoot tomorrow. I’d hate for anything to go wrong.’
Melissa rolled her eyes and slid off her barstool. ‘Oh, fine. Honestly, finding capable people these days... You guys all carry on having fun! I’ll be right back.’
Eloise stalked out of the bar into the empty corridor, breathing deeply in the hope that she’d be able to talk to Melissa rationally and calmly. Like a grown-up. Like she’d never managed to do with her before.
‘So, what’s the problem?’ Melissa asked, all trace of her affected friendliness gone.
‘I’d rather you didn’t bring my mother into conversations, please,’ Eloise said as calmly as possible. ‘My family history has no bearing on this wedding, and I’m sure your friends don’t care about who my mother slept with over a decade ago.’
‘I’m sure they don’t either,’ Melissa said, her tone sharp. ‘Your mother was a slut and a disgrace, but who cares about that now, right? But if you’re sleeping with Noah Cross, you can bet everyone in Hollywood will care about that. It’ll be the biggest story of my wedding—and that is unacceptable.’
‘I’m not...I’m not sleeping with Noah. I only just met the guy,’ Eloise said, taken aback.
‘So? What difference does that make?’ Melissa asked. ‘He’s a huge name, he’s gorgeous, he’s loaded and he’s interested. Of course you’re going to sleep with him. You’d be an idiot not to. But not at my wedding, okay?’
Melissa turned and strode back into the bar, her perfect smile in place on her perfect face. Eloise stared after her, stunned.
‘But... But I’m not sleeping with Noah Cross,’ she said again, to the empty hallway.
‘And isn’t that a crying shame?’ Noah said from behind her.
* * *
Noah hadn’t meant to gatecrash the hen night. It was just that he felt about ten years too old for the stag do. Not in actual age, he supposed, but in maturity. And, given that he regularly expected to be the least mature guy at the table, that was saying something.
Riley might be getting married, but he still seemed like a kid to Noah. It was as if the whole wedding was a game, another act. That at the end of the day he could take his ring off and go back to being just Riley again—no harm, no foul.
Marriage meant somewhat more to Noah. That was why he had no intention of ever entertaining the institution.
Still, even knowing that not everyone in Hollywood shared his opinion on the importance of marriage, he hadn’t expected the stag do to feel so...shallow. Meaningless.
Irrationally, he blamed Eloise. She was the opposite of shallow. She’d given him false expectations for the rest of the world.
He hadn’t even been looking for Eloise, particularly. He’d been looking for a drink—a proper one, not a cup from the keg Riley had insisted on, as a homage to frat movies past. But when he’d heard Eloise’s voice...he had to admit that maybe it had been her he’d been looking for all along.
Melissa spat out something hateful about Eloise’s mother, and Eloise responded with a denial. Noah moved in closer, in time to hear Melissa rate all the things about him that mattered in her world, none of which were anything he’d want to feature in his obituary.
Then she left, and Eloise was alone in the hallway.
‘I’m not sleeping with Noah Cross,’ she said.
Noah stepped out of the shadows. ‘And isn’t that a crying shame?’
Eloise spun round, her eyes wide. ‘What are you doing here?’
‘Just looking for a drink.’ Was it the lights, or was that something akin to lust that he saw in her eyes? ‘And you.’
‘Why?’
He didn’t have an answer. It should have been easy—I want you. I desire you. He’d been sure that was all this was, this strange attraction between them. A game, a flirtation. A friendship with edge, that was all. At least until the kiss they’d shared at the Frost Fair.
Now...now he had no idea what this was, or why the need to be with her was thrumming through his body like a second heartbeat.
But it was. And he did need her. Right now.
Discretion be damned.
Noah moved forward, closing the distance between them in just a couple of steps. Eloise licked her lips, just a quick brush of her pink tongue against her lower lip, but it was enough to drive Noah wild. Enough for him to imagine those lips on his own again. To imagine them on his skin, covering his body, while his own mouth touched every single inch of her...
No, he had no idea what this was between them. But he knew he was done fighting it.
He wrapped his arms around her waist, just as he had on the stage that afternoon. But this time there were no costumes, no parts. No Romeo, no Juliet. Just Noah and Eloise.
She stared up at him, her lips parted, her pupils so large they almost eclipsed the blue-green of her beautiful eyes. She wanted this as badly as he did; he could see it.
But the most frightening thing was, he wasn’t sure that a kiss would be enough. Or one night. Or several nights.
He wanted her body, sure, but what scared him was how much more he wanted. What was it about Eloise that made him want to look deeper? To know more, to understand?
Deeper was off the table—and had been since Sally.
But if it hadn’t been...he had a feeling that Eloise was a woman he could have shown every inch of his soul, and come to know hers in return.
He shook his head, just an inch or so, just enough to dismiss the thoughts. He’d known the woman a couple of days. That wasn’t what this was about, for either of them.
All he needed to concentrate on was kissing her again.
He didn’t say anything—words were unnecessary now. As he stared into Eloise’s eyes he knew she understood everything he wasn’t saying. He tilted his head, lowering his lips to hers, and she rose up on her toes to meet him, pressing her body against his. He could feel every inch of her pressed against him, warm and soft and wanting where they touched, and he couldn’t help but deepen the kiss. It took everything he had not to sweep her up against the nearest wall and make love to her, without a thought for who might see or what they’d think. Or what might get back to Stefan, the director, who needed to believe that Noah could control his baser instincts.
Usually, he could, Noah was sure. He remembered having control, willpower, restraint once. Before he’d met Eloise.
He’d never felt this before—this desperate, unthinking desire. He’d dated the world’s most beautiful women and he’d had true love, yet none of them had ever inspired this sort of passion down deep inside of him.
Noah didn’t want to think too much about what that meant. He just wanted to enjoy it.
But then Eloise pulled away.
Noah let his hands fall from her waist as she stepped back, staring up at him, her mouth half open as if she wanted to talk but couldn’t quite get the words out. After a moment of wordless staring, she swallowed and said, ‘Not here. Please, not here.’
‘Right. Of course.’ This was a bad idea. This was everything he’d sworn he wouldn’t do this week. ‘I should go.’
But then Eloise met his gaze and shook her head before she turned away, stalking up the hallway towards the stairs.
He watched her go, his whole body at war with his mind. His feet ached to follow her, his arms to reach out and grab her. But his mind told him to stop this now, before it grew too much. Too dangerous.
Never mind that it could jeopardise the first movie role he’d been excited about in seven years. As much as he wanted it right now, the film seemed like the least important thing in his world.
There was a reason he didn’t normally feel this way about women—he didn’t let himself. But Eloise had pierced through every defence he’d ever built in less than forty-eight hours. How much more damage could she do with another day?
His eyes fell shut as he willed his body to leave it be.
But this time his body won out.
It took seconds to catch her up, halfway up the stairs to the third floor, but she didn’t acknowledge his presence at all. Which at least meant she wasn’t sending him away. In silence, they made their way up the stairs, down darkened hallways, to a room at the far corner of the hotel.
Eloise’s hands shook as she reached for her key, and he leaned over to take it from her without thinking. She rested against the door, her back to the wood as she looked up at him, her eyes vulnerable now. Wary.
‘I said I wouldn’t do this,’ she whispered. So had he. But some things couldn’t be denied.
‘Because you don’t want to?’ he asked softly. ‘Or because Melissa told you not to?’
‘Because I’m not normally this person.’
‘Do you want to be?’
If she said no, he’d walk away. The frustration might kill him but he’d do it. But he didn’t think she would. He’d seen something deeper in her—something more than she’d admit to. She might try and hide herself in those dark and dull dresses, might pin her beautiful hair back so it didn’t blaze so brightly, but she couldn’t hide who she really was for ever.
And Noah had a feeling that the real Eloise Miller would be spectacular.
How could he not want to see her in all her glory?
‘If you ask me to go,’ he said, his voice hoarse, ‘I’ll go.’
She bit her lip, then reached out to take the key from him again.
‘Don’t go,’ she whispered, and Noah’s whole soul sang.
CHAPTER NINE
WHAT WAS SHE DOING? What on earth was she doing?
Well, Eloise thought as Noah kissed her deeply, pressing her up against the wood of her bedroom door, whatever she was doing felt fantastic.
But then reality caught up with her.
‘Nobody knows,’ she managed to get out between kisses.
Noah tilted his head back from hers and she missed his lips the instant they were gone. ‘What?’ he asked, sounding hazy with lust.
Good. She shouldn’t be the only one losing her mind over this strange attraction between them.
‘Nobody knows,’ she repeated. ‘This is our secret, okay?’
He nodded. ‘Fine. Great. Anything. Just open the door.’
The man had a point, Eloise conceded as she turned within the circle of his arms and struggled to open the door with shaking hands. If they didn’t get to a bed soon it was very possible they’d both be naked in the corridor within five minutes. Maybe less.
Finally, the door gave way and they tumbled into Eloise’s room. It wasn’t anywhere near as grand as Noah’s, but she didn’t imagine he cared very much right then. She definitely didn’t.
As she fell onto the bed, Noah’s body covering hers, Eloise’s last coherent thought before giving in to pleasure was, As long as it’s a secret, no one can get hurt.
* * *
Later, much later, Noah drew lazy patterns on her skin with his clever fingers, and Eloise couldn’t even find the energy to care that she was naked beside one of the world’s official top ten most beautiful men, and he was staring at her. Her. Boring, embarrassed and blushing Eloise Miller, with her too bright hair and her too tall and straight body.
‘You’re really good at that,’ she managed eventually, the first words either of them had spoken since they’d fallen apart in each other’s arms after what seemed like hours of pleasure. In reality... Eloise squinted at the clock. How had it only been forty-five minutes since she’d been telling Melissa she wasn’t sleeping with Noah Cross? ‘Practice, I suppose.’
‘Maybe I was just very, very motivated.’ Noah pressed a kiss to her bare shoulder, then carried on up her neck. Eloise squirmed until he captured her lips and she let herself sink into the kiss.
It was secret. He’d promised. It was just them, just one night.
She could let herself have this, and enjoy it. Just this once.
Noah raised himself up on one elbow so he was looking down at her. Eloise wondered where he’d found the energy. Blinking and breathing were taking all of hers.
‘What Melissa was saying before...’ Noah trailed off, and Eloise would have groaned if she had the strength. The last thing she wanted to talk about while in bed with Noah Cross was Melissa. ‘About your mother...’ Noah began again, and she realised she was wrong.
The absolute last thing she ever wanted to talk about was her mother.
‘It doesn’t matter,’ she said quickly, hoping she could end the conversation before it really got started. ‘It was a long time ago.’
‘It seemed to matter to you earlier. I mean, you promised Melissa you wouldn’t sleep with me because of it.’
‘And look how well that turned out.’
Noah’s smile took on a hint of smugness. ‘Chemistry like ours...you can’t promise that away. Trust me, I tried.’
‘You tried?’ If the last couple of days had been Noah trying not to sleep with her, he sucked at it.
‘Not very hard,’ he admitted. ‘But you’re not the only one who needs to keep this a secret. There’s this director... Anyway, it doesn’t matter. Let’s just say it’s not in my best interests to have this be public knowledge either.’
That was good, Eloise thought. If they both needed it to stay secret, they’d both be more motivated to keep it that way. And that meant there was a chance she might survive this week after all.
‘So why did you risk it?’ she asked, frowning. She wasn’t the sort of woman men took risks over. That was definitely her mother, or Melissa. Not her.
‘Because I couldn’t not,’ Noah said, smiling. ‘I know my limits when it comes to resisting beautiful women.’
‘You’ve experienced this a lot?’ Eloise didn’t like that idea. For her, this was a completely new feeling. The idea that Noah had this with every woman he met... It wasn’t that she thought she was anything special, exactly. But if she only got one night with him, she at least wanted it to be one he’d remember.
‘Never,’ Noah swore, his gaze fixed on hers, truth in his eyes. ‘Not like this.’
‘Me neither,’ Eloise whispered. And, worst of all, she was very afraid she might never feel it again. She’d gone twenty-six years without ever feeling anything close, so it didn’t seem likely that the kind of intense passion she had with Noah was waiting for her around every corner.
‘I don’t do this,’ Noah admitted, and Eloise raised her eyebrows. He obviously sensed her scepticism because he went on, ‘Not the sex. Yes, I’ve slept with women. Probably less than you think, but that’s not the point. I mean...’ He sucked in a deep breath. ‘Normally, this is easy. Casual. I don’t feel the need to ask questions, to get to know a woman’s personal history. But with you...it’s different. You’re different.’
Something in Eloise’s chest tightened. Part of her wanted to be pleased, to be proud to be something more than the usual casual encounter that Noah indulged in. But another, larger part of her heart was curling up in the corner of her ribcage, wishing he’d move on and stop noticing her.
Because, whatever he said, she knew the truth. He might not feel it now, but Noah Cross didn’t do deep and meaningful. Maybe he wanted to hear all about her childhood woes, but would he give her anything in return? She doubted it.
But still she found herself saying, ‘What do you want to know?’
‘She was an actress, right? Your mother?’ Eloise nodded. ‘So, is she the reason you don’t date actors?’
‘I don’t date actors because I’ve known too many of them,’ Eloise said with a sigh. ‘And most of them were sleeping with my mum.’
Noah winced. ‘Ah.’
‘Yeah.’ She turned onto her side so they were face to face in the darkness, what little light there was coming through the window glinting in his beautiful eyes. ‘She was a big fish in a small pond, I guess. She’d been on the West End stage before she had me. She was pregnant when she met my dad.’
‘He’s not your biological father?’
Eloise shook her head. ‘No. But he was the one who was there for me, every moment. Every step of the way.’
‘So, what happened? They got married?’
‘They did. And they moved out here, back to the town where my dad had grown up. His family were all gone but...he loved this place, and he wanted Mum to love it too. But she didn’t.’
Eloise sucked in a deep breath, preparing herself for the rest of the story. Living it had been horrendous, but surely just telling it couldn’t be that bad.
She’d never had to tell it before. Everyone else around here just knew.
‘The one thing she did like was the Theatre Society. Our town has a small community theatre. A proper stage, raked seats—the whole thing. So, after I was born, Mum joined the Theatre Society. And because she had the experience on the London stage, well, she became the main attraction pretty quickly, I think. As long as I remember, she had every starring role in every play or show they did there. And if she didn’t...well, she’d threaten to walk out until they changed their minds. They couldn’t afford to upset her, you see. She was their star.’
‘I’ve known actresses like that,’ Noah said drily. ‘And actors too. They’re not fun to work with.’
‘No. I can’t imagine Mum was, for most of the people in the society. But her leading men...’ This was the hardest part. ‘Every production, it was the same story. They’d cast the best-looking guy against her, and every time Mum would make him fall for her. Whether she fell for them too, I don’t know. She always claimed to be desperately in love with them—at least until the show was over. Then she’d drop them and come back to Dad, until the next show. But by then...she’d destroyed those men’s lives. Their marriages were in tatters, their reputations ruined. Some had left their families, lost their friends, sometimes even their jobs, for Mum. And she just forgot them the minute the curtain came down.’
‘How many times did she do this?’ Noah asked, his voice soft.
‘Too many. I don’t know. Maybe six, or seven? It didn’t start until I was about ten, I don’t think—or, if it did, she was more discreet about it. But by the time I was a teenager, everyone knew what she was. What she did. And every guy swore she wouldn’t get him—but she always did. If she wanted a man, she had him. And every time my dad was left humiliated.’
‘But he always took her back. Why?’
‘He loved her.’ It was as simple and as awful as that. ‘And she loved him too, I think. In her way. She always came home in the end, full of apologies and talk about how things would be different. And they were, for a time. It just never lasted.’
Eloise had always known, from watching her parents, that love was as much a trap as a blessing. That she had to be careful who she fell in love with—because that would be the rest of her life, right there. She could leave, or he could, but it wouldn’t change the fact that she loved him, and she’d carry that with her every day.
Was it any wonder she’d never let herself feel that deeply before?
And she wasn’t going to start with Noah Cross.
‘And Melissa held your parents’ behaviour over you?’ Noah guessed.
‘For years. She made sure everyone knew—and told everyone who’d listen that I was just like my mother. So no girls would be friends with me in case I stole their boyfriends, and no guys would risk being seen with me in case people made fun of them. I didn’t even have a proper boyfriend until just before I went away to university. There were a couple of guys at school...but Melissa stole them away pretty fast. Then Derek...’
‘Derek?’ Noah prodded when she trailed off, and Eloise sighed. This was the most humiliating bit.
‘The summer before I left for uni, I was in a play at the Theatre Society. I’d been in loads before, but always in the chorus or helping backstage. This was my first real role. And Derek...he was the director. Older than me—he was twenty-five, I think, to my eighteen. But he took a shine to me. He was my first real everything, I suppose.’
Noah shifted closer, something Eloise hadn’t thought was possible until she felt his arms holding her tighter. ‘What happened?’
‘Mum had the lead role, of course. But her leading man broke his leg a couple of weeks into rehearsals. Derek stepped in...’
Noah winced. ‘And your mother?’
‘Did what she always did.’ Eloise shrugged. ‘I don’t know why I thought it would be any different, just because he was my boyfriend instead of someone else’s husband.’
‘How did you find out?’
‘Melissa, of course. She sent me down to the prop room to fetch something when she knew they were there together.’ Eloise swallowed at the memory, her throat suddenly tight. If she thought about it too long, she became eighteen again—in the grip of infatuation, sexual awakening and too many hormones, and seeing all her dreams and illusions shattered in one instant, as she saw her mother half naked against the prop table, and Derek kissing her.
Noah cursed. ‘What did you do?’
‘I shut the door, walked away and pretended I’d never been there. I finished with Derek, of course, who didn’t seem all that disappointed. And then I ran away to university.’ She’d been searching for freedom, the ability to be herself, without the baggage of her family history. But all she’d found was that she was the same shy, scared and gullible little girl in a different town.
‘And after college you moved back here?’ Noah sounded surprised. ‘You even came and worked at the same hotel. Why?’
‘It was my home,’ Eloise said firmly. ‘I couldn’t let them take that from me. When I first took the chambermaid job here at sixteen, I guess I was just looking for some freedom. But when I came back...it was a safe place. My place.’
‘I guess I can understand that,’ Noah said, but his tone said he couldn’t.
She sighed. ‘Also...university wasn’t the fresh new life I was hoping for. Turns out I was the same naive and gullible Eloise there too.’
She’d thrown herself into her business studies and, in her final year, a relationship with another student. Everything seemed perfect—they’d talked about setting up an events business together, about heading out into the real world and making it big. Everything she’d dreamed of seemed close to coming true—running her own business, living her own life, making a success of things at last. Until he’d run off with her best ideas and the only friend she’d made at university, leaving all her classmates talking about it.
Really, was it any wonder she avoided love these days?
‘Do you want to tell me?’ Noah asked, and Eloise shook her head.
‘Let’s just say, at least the guy who screwed me over personally and professionally at uni wasn’t an actor.’
Noah didn’t press for the whole sordid story, which she appreciated. She’d shared enough of her past disasters for one night.
Instead, he kissed her shoulder and asked, ‘Where are your parents now?’
‘My dad died while I was at university. My mum...she’s still in town. Her memory is going, though. Early onset dementia, the doctors said. She can’t even remember everything she did back then. These days she’s just a harmless old lady, I suppose. And the town... Well, they haven’t forgotten, I don’t suppose. But there are newer and better scandals to talk about most of the time.’