For Her Son's Sake

“Fine. I don’t think an affair is a wise idea either. For the record I’m not some kind of monster, Emma. I don’t get off on hurting women.”

She realized that her words had cut him and that hadn’t been her intent. She shook her head. “I never thought that. I just know where you and I are concerned there is too much baggage. We’re the oldest children in our families. The ones who are determined to carry on our families’ complex legacy, and that makes us the worst two people in the world to ever get involved.”

“I agree,” he said.

“It was probably a fluke,” she said. “Just the tension of the moment. I know I wanted to get the better of you at something.”

He gave her a wry grin. “You haven’t had the best of me.”

“Haven’t I?” she asked. Then smacked herself in the forehead. “I’m not flirting with you.”

“I’d apologize but I’m not sorry. This doesn’t have to be any more complicated then we make it.”

“I agree since we’re not kissing or touching again. Right?”

He put his hands up. “You fell into my arms.”

“You kissed me,” she said, pointing her finger at him.

“I did, but you looked up at me with your lips parted...what was I supposed to do?”

* * *

Kell prided himself on always being in control, and the fact that Emma had shaken him made him want to investigate this further. He didn’t want to ignore it or let it go. He needed to explore why he was weak where she was concerned and then ensure it never happened again.

Seeing the way she was running from him made him reconsider. She had a point. He would never let himself love any woman especially not Emma. He knew that his heart was still too full of hate. He’d never really learned how to care for a woman. It didn’t matter that he really didn’t know her as a person, that her last name had formed his opinion of her long ago.

But his racing pulse and lingering hard-on were sending a different message. He didn’t want to let her go. That’s why he was standing in the stairwell debating something that he knew he should drop. It made no sense that just as he was finally reaching his life’s goal, he’d find time to pursue this. To pursue her. Her?

Was he really doing this?

“I don’t know. I have no idea what that was about. I haven’t been attracted to anyone since Helio.”

With those few words she made Kell feel something for her. She was young, widowed and he’d recently outmaneuvered her in the corporate world. He understood that a gentleman would back away. There was no sense in chasing her.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. I honestly thought I’d never feel anything for a man again.”

“Silver lining?” he asked, sardonically.

“In a way. I’m sorry I enticed you to kiss me,” she said. “I had been a little curious about you since we were interns together.”

He arched one eyebrow at her. He liked Emma when she forgot to be all buttoned up and cool. He had a feeling she wasn’t going to ever be this honest with him again because it left her vulnerable. But he definitely liked seeing her this way.

“Me too. But your grandfather was always watching us back then,” Kell said.

“Yes, he was. I wanted to make a good impression and you were always Johnny-on-the-spot with everything. You were a very hard act to follow.”

He felt a flush of pride at what she said. When he’d been an intern he’d still had a few dreams that the world wasn’t the bitter place his grandfather had always made it seem. Of course after his experience with Gregory Chandler his entire perspective had changed. It was odd to think of those days now. Kell had been a completely different man.

“What can I say? I like to be the best at everything.”

“You certainly are good at kissing,” she said, and then flushed and groaned. “I’m going home now. Don’t follow me.”

He nodded. She was cute when she was flustered. Why was he just now seeing this? Probably because he’d taken over her company, his lethal focus on revenge had shifted somewhat.

“I won’t. I’ll see you at the meeting in two days,” he said, pushing his hands into his pockets. He had another meeting of his own in twenty minutes; he needed to start thinking about that instead of how good she’d felt in his arms and the fact that he could still taste her on his lips.

“Thank you,” she said, turning to walk down the stairs. Seeing the sway of her hips and the way the black Chanel dress clung to them made his breath catch.

“Emma?”

She paused but didn’t turn, just glanced over her shoulder at him. “Yes?”

“I...I don’t know if I’ll be able to resist you if you fall into my arms again.”

There. He’d said it. He felt better for having warned her. “I’m not saying that I want anything to develop between us. But I’m attracted to you and given how much time we spend together I wanted to be honest. If that happens again I don’t know if I’ll be able to stop.”

She gave him a smile that was at once the sweetest expression and the saddest. He’d have to analyze it later because right now he knew he was missing something really important in it.

“Fair enough,” she said.

“But then we both know that life isn’t fair, don’t we?” he asked.

“Yes,” she said in the quietest of voices.

He realized that she’d been hurt more than he wanted to acknowledge. Part of it no doubt had come from him and his hostile takeover but more of it had come from the personal tragedies in her life. And where she was right now.

He wanted to apologize but he wasn’t truly sorry for anything. If that elevator door hadn’t opened, who knew how much further the embrace would have gone. He hadn’t wanted it to end when it had. He was still on fire for her. But earlier she’d pointed out that he was a man of his word in business and he knew he was going to have to be the same when it came to this area too. He wasn’t going to be able to just go after her like any other woman he was attracted to.

It wasn’t fair to her or to him. And despite what the world had taught him, he was beginning to want life to be fair for her. She deserved it.

“See you at the board meeting,” he said, turning and going back up the stairs to the executive floor. When he got there, he walked through the massive reception area. Everywhere around him were the fruits of his labor. The signs of the success that he’d made from the broken dreams of his grandfather.

Usually this walk made him proud but today it felt a little hollow. When he entered the executive corridor and saw his cousins standing around talking and smiling, he felt left out again. And realized revenge hadn’t brought him what he’d thought it would.

* * *

Emma drove back to Infinity Games’ old headquarters, which now served as the satellite location for the merged company. Even in the middle of the day, the drive from downtown Los Angeles to Malibu wasn’t great. The traffic in this part of the world was ridiculous. By the time she got back, she was ready to call it quits but when she headed up to her office, she found her sisters waiting for her.

Clearly they were here on a mission. She suspected they wanted to help her, and that was touching but also annoying. She was the eldest. The one they turned to for advice and support. She didn’t like seeing them both sitting there looking at her as if she was the fragile one.

“How did we beat you back here?” Cari asked. “You left twenty minutes before we did.”

“Kell and I got stuck in the elevator together. At least I had a chance to talk to him about a new idea,” she said. Then he’d kissed her and made her forget her name.

“Good,” Jessi said. “He can be a dic—dictator but I think he’s fair.”

Fair. If she heard that word again today she was going to pick up the crystal paperweight her grandfather had given her on her twenty-fifth birthday and heave it at the wall.

“Nice,” Cari said. “You usually call him other things.”

“Yeah, I know, Jessie said. “But ever since Allan and I got together he said I couldn’t call Kell Darth-Sucks-A-Lot anymore.”

“Probably a good idea,” Emma said. “Don’t you two have work to do?”

“Why, yes, we do. Are you trying to get rid of us?” Jessi asked.

“Why, yes, I am. I need a few minutes to myself.”

Cari came over and patted her on the back. “We’re not leaving you alone until we’re sure you’re okay. You know you’d do the same if it were either of us in your position.”

“But that’s because I’m the oldest and I know best,” Emma said.

“You don’t. You just know three more years’ worth of stuff than we do,” Jessi said.

Emma had to laugh. She looked at her sisters and acknowledged how happy she was that they were both moving on with their lives. She was glad that the mess that she’d made of Infinity Games hadn’t taken them down with it.

“That’s so true. But I’m okay. I don’t need to discuss any of this today,” she said.

“Why not? I freaked out when Dec came back into my life,” Cari said. “And I tried to deal with it on my own, but I finally realized I needed you and Jessi to help me out. We’re stronger together, Em. We always have been.”

She wanted to lean on her sisters but she had no idea what she would say to them. She had to find a way to keep her job, stay away from Kell and never again kiss him. It was complicated.

She walked passed Cari and Jessi and put her handbag in the bottom drawer of her desk before sitting down and facing them. On her desk was a picture of Sammy smiling up at her with his little toddler face. He was so sweet and precious to her. She couldn’t afford to be anything other than successful in her bid to create a new role for herself at Playtone-Infinity Games.

“You don’t have to worry about me,” she said. “I’ve got a solid idea.”

“What is it?”

“Taking our charity arm and turning it into a foundation with a full-time chairman.”

“Great idea,” Jessi said. “So that’s a job for you but what will the foundation do?”

“I’ve been playing around with a prototype reading app with Sammy,” Emma said. “It’s tailored to his way of learning. I gave Kell a top-line view of what I’m thinking and he said it was worth pursuing.”

“I think it is, too,” Cari said. “Who’s doing the coding?”

Emma had studied computer programming in college so she had a rudimentary knowledge of how to code. “I have. But it’s very basic. I wanted to play with it myself and see if it would fly before I put our staff to work on it.”

“I’ve got two guys coming off a project this week. I could allocate them to you,” Cari said. As head of development it was her job to keep all their staff working.

“I don’t have a budget yet. I need to put something together for the next board meeting and once I get approved I would love to have your staffing help.”

“I’ll get Allan to help you with the budget,” Jessi said.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, I am. If he says no, he’ll answer to me,” Jessi said.

Emma felt surrounded by the love of her sisters and realized that even though she’d felt alone and isolated earlier, they were here for her. They had her back and always would.

“Thank you,” she said. “I’m a little too used to handling everything on my own.”

“We know. It’s your own fault because you made it too easy for us to just do our own thing and not really have to help you out. But this merger has been tough on all of us,” Cari said.

“And if we’ve learned anything, it’s that we need each other,” Jessi added. “We got your back, big sis.”

When her sisters left her office, Emma pretended that the only real concern she had was her upcoming presentation to the board. But she was lying to herself. And she knew it. She couldn’t stop thinking about Kell and how his hands had felt on her body. The ache deep inside of her reminded her that she wasn’t going to be able to forget that for a long time.

Three

Sammy sat off to one side of the other kids and looked down at the tablet in his hands at the childcare center on the Infinity Games campus in Malibu. It worried Emma. He wasn’t antisocial, but he only engaged when he wanted to. She’d considered lecturing him on it or trying to correct his behavior but Helio’s mother said he used to do the same thing when he was growing up.

There were times when Emma missed Helio so much. They’d had a whirlwind courtship and a glamorous marriage in Dubai before he’d started the Formula 1 racing season. Then he had the accident that ended his life, and it was all over. So they hadn’t really ever lived together. It was moments like this when she saw him so clearly in her son that she felt the emptiness.

“Your secretary said I could find you here,” Kell said, coming up next to her.

“Why are you looking for me?” she asked, blinking to clear away any lingering emotion from her eyes before turning to look at her nemesis. He hadn’t lost all his hair overnight as she’d hoped. Or developed a big potbelly. Instead he was just as handsome as he’d been yesterday in the elevator. And if the way her pulse quickened was any indication, she still wanted him.

“Allan came by this morning with some financials on your new idea and I thought it might be a good time to discuss it,” Kell said.

“Why did Allan bring my numbers to you? I was planning to present them tomorrow.” She’d been working almost nonstop on the business plan for the foundation. Now that she didn’t have to concentrate on keeping Infinity Games in the black she felt sort of free. And the foundation had been a dream of hers for a long time, one she’d never been able to talk her grandfather into pursuing.

“They’re better than you expected. Allan and Dec have recommended we skip tomorrow’s meeting and let you get on with the project,” Kell said. “If we can go back to your office, I have some new targets I’d like to discuss with you.”

That was good news. She glanced back into the nursery and noted that Sammy was watching her where she stood in the doorway. She smiled over at him and he put down the tablet and got to his feet in that awkward toddler way of his.

“I can’t go back just yet,” she said. “Sammy and I have a morning appointment for a snack.”

“This might be why your company failed,” Kell said. “You’re on the clock.”

“I started working at six a.m. so I think a ten minute break is acceptable.”

“It might be, but business should always come first.”

“That you think so might be why you’re all alone,” she said quietly. “It’s only for ten minutes and I’m sure even the great and powerful Kell Montrose can wait that long.”

The look he gave her was frosty and hard. But underneath it she could see that she’d hurt him. She had to remember what she’d learned yesterday—beneath his all-business exterior Kell was a real man. She remembered what he’d said about his mother and thought that maybe because he hadn’t had a bond with her, he didn’t realize how important it was.

Before he could say anything though, Sammy came over to them where they stood just inside the doorway by the coatrack.

“Mommy,” he said, launching himself at her.

She scooped him up in her arms and hugged him close. Then she kissed the top of his head and set him back on the ground. He kept his tiny hand in hers.

“Hi,” Sammy said, looking up at Kell.

The two had met before. Since Jessi and Cari were both moms now and engaged to Kell’s cousins, their families had spent time together. And Emma actually liked both Dec and Allan. But they were nothing like Kell. He’d always seemed out of place and uncomfortable around the new babies and around her son.

“Hiya,” Kell said. “What were you doing on the tablet?”

“Playing a game.”

“One of ours?”

“Mommy didn’t make it,” Sammy said. “It’s snack time.”

“I heard,” Kell said. “Can I join you?”

What? She looked over at him and he raised one eyebrow at her in response.

“Yes. Mommy made enough for me to share,” Sammy said.

They followed him to a table where three other children were already seated. The chairs were tiny and as the nursery teacher brought over a chair for Emma, she looked at Kell. There was no way his big frame was going to be able to perch on this tiny chair.

He just sat down cross-legged on the floor at the head of the table. Sammy sat next to him in front of his The Avengers lunchbox and opened it up. He took out a package of raisins and placed a few in front of Kell and then couple in front of Emma.

“Thank you,” she said.

“Thanks,” Kell said. “What game were you playing again?”

“Music,” Sammy said.

“It’s a program that teaches kids to play simple melodies. They can sing along with it and follow a little bouncing grape on the keyboard.”

“What can you play?”

“Can’t take it away,” Sammy said, popping a raisin into his mouth. “It’s Mommy’s favorite.”

“Is it?” Kell asked, glancing over at her.

“Yes. He means ‘They Can’t Take That Away From Me.’ I like old jazz so he is sort of growing up listening to Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong. Plus it’s a duet and we sing it at night before bedtime, don’t we?”

Sammy nodded. “Uncle Dec plays me rap so that I’m not—what’d he call it?”

“Stodgy,” Emma said.

“Sounds like Dec.”

She could tell that Kell had more questions but Sammy started talking to the little girl, Anna, next to him. They were trying to swap snacks.

Kell turned to Emma. “I have more questions.”

“I know, but he’s three and it’s snack time,” she explained.

“After snack time then. I want to know why he likes his game,” Kell said. “Do the other kids play with tablets as well? I recently read an article about kids in Estonia who are learning to program robots at the age of seven. Your idea for the reading app is right on trend.”

Great. “I bet you’re glad you didn’t just fire me outright.”

“Don’t get cocky. You still have to prove you can make it work.”

Of course she did.

* * *

As far as mistakes went, this was one was colossal. He’d told himself he’d come to the Malibu campus of Playtone-Infinity Games to meet with Emma about her idea. But he knew that was a lie. As soon as he’d entered the building he’d felt a zing of emotion go straight through him.

He’d thought of nothing but how she’d felt in his arms the day before. He hadn’t slept or been able to concentrate on his five-year plan as he’d gone for his run that morning. Instead he’d thought of all the ways he wanted to make love to her.

For a man who’d been focused on revenge and corporate takeovers for most of his adult life, it had been unnerving to say the least. So he’d driven here to talk to her. To prove to himself that he’d remembered it all wrong. That she hadn’t changed him by falling into his arms.

But that wasn’t the way this was going.

Instead he was sitting at the kiddie table listening to the babble of three-year-olds and realizing two things. One, that if this was they were going to launch a reading app for this market, he was going to have to find a lot more patience for dealing with his future focus groups. And two, he was still just as attracted to Emma as he’d been the day before. In fact he might be even more so than he’d previously thought.

Never before had the way a woman nibbled a breakfast snack turned him on. But it had today.

“Is that okay?” she asked.

No, he thought. Then realized she had to be talking about something else. There was no way she could possibly know that she’d rattled him. “I’m sorry, what did you say?”

“I asked if you’d mind if Sammy and some of his friends played with the prototype and then gave us some feedback.”

“That’s what I was going to suggest,” he said. He glanced around the table and noticed that the kids had finished their snacks and were putting away their lunch boxes. It was just he and Emma sitting there.

He popped his last raisin into his mouth and then pushed up to his feet. He was more than ready to get out of the nursery. He hadn’t been around this many kids since he’d been one himself. The merger and the relationships that had sprung up from it were making his life a mess, Kell thought. There were babies everywhere. Which made him think about things he’d never really considered before. Like the future.

Emma stood up as well, brushing her hands down the sides of her pantsuit and tucking the tail of her blouse back into the waistband where it had come out. Her long hair hung around her shoulders. His palms tingled with the remembered feel of its silkiness and he wanted to touch it again. Touch her again. He didn’t know how he was going to keep his word that he wouldn’t pursue her.

It was all he wanted.

It made no sense. He felt like an idiot. Why was he here? He should be running in the other direction instead of stopping by her office.

“Kell?”

“Yes?”

“You okay?”

No, he wasn’t okay. In fact he to admit, he’d never been okay. He’d always been just a little messed up. And part of that was due to his mom. He saw the way Emma was with Sammy, and couldn’t help thinking that his own mom had never come and had a snack with him at school.

No matter how many times he’d told himself he hadn’t expected her, he’d always sort of hoped she’d show up at something. But she never had.

Sammy was lucky to have Emma. And Kell knew that probably the best gift he could give the kid would be to make sure that Emma’s job didn’t take up too much of her time. He should fire her now, get her out of his life, give the kid his mom full-time and—

Pretty much piss off the only family he had. There were really only two people in the world that he’d always cared about, and they were Allan and Dec. If he fired Emma they’d be furious.

He was stuck.

It didn’t matter that it was common sense to avoid the mess that was this five-foot, five inch, one-hundred-thirty-pound woman with reddish-brown hair and eyes that made him forget she was the granddaughter of his sworn enemy and the only person still alive who’d witnessed his greatest humiliation.

“Yes, I’m fine. Just realized that a focus group with kids is going to be very interesting,” he said, trying to bring his mind back to business.

“I agree. I think we should give it to Jessi’s team and see what they can do with it,” Emma said with a grin.

“Your sister already doesn’t like me, despite Allan’s best efforts to change her mind. I think if I suggested that she should head up focus groups with three-year-olds she’d go ballistic.”

Emma laughed. The sound was full and infectious and he couldn’t help almost smiling. The fact that he never smiled was the only thing that kept him from doing it now.

“We can work out those details in your office,” he said.

He wanted to get away from her son and this environment. He was seeing Emma as a person and not simply an employee in a company he’d taken over. She was no longer looking like collateral damage but like a woman. His woman.

No. She’d never be his and that was the only way it could be. And after today, he wasn’t coming to the Malibu office.

He’d make Dec deal with Emma and her transition from now on. Kell had to keep his distance before he did something he’d totally regret like pull her back into his arms and kiss her yet again.

* * *

Emma took the stairs up to her office, not wanting to risk getting trapped in the elevator with Kell. Not this morning, when she was seeing him in the new light that had started yesterday. It was one thing to say their behavior in the elevator had been a fluke but to see him this morning, sitting on the floor and talking to her son, had made Kell seem like a regular guy. And that had put images in her head that she had no business believing. Images that made it seem as if maybe she could kiss him again and more.

Which was absolutely insane. He was still Kell Montrose. A man who was ruled by the past and determined to eradicate her from the face of gaming.

Was that his play?