Fate and Love

She twirled from side to side checking herself out from all angles. The ponytail bundled on top of her head seemed like a magical golden snake, bathing in the sunlight.

For the longest time, Mary rummaged through her pitiful wardrobe.

“Darn,” she mumbled, biting her bottom lip. “The first date in my life, and I have nothing to wear!

Finally, she chose simple black pants and a matching figure-hugging shirt. It was her favorite emerald green color, flattering and turned her mood on as she looked intensely at herself in the mirror.

For the first time, she noticed that the fabric emphasized perfectly the curvy shape of her upper body. Her cheeks blushed.

In amazement, because this was not her normal way, she watched her hand move slowly up, and her tiny fingers, acting of their own free will, undid the first two buttons. In an effort at modesty, she patted down the edges of her almost plunging blouse.

“Mustn’t tempt themselves or others,” she mumbled. A tint of shame flashed green across her kaleidoscopic eyes. “So our clothing should be decent and chaste…”

She tried to compel herself to close her shirt as usual. She couldn’t!

“Come on, stupid!” she snapped at herself. “As if a man like him would fall for a little flash of skin. What, is he a virgin or a monk? Give me a break!”

She noticed that the cross she was wearing around her neck accentuated the crevice between her breasts, and she took the necklace off.

“Don’t overdo it, girl,” she mumbled, looking at her reflection again.

In the corner of her eye she caught the flowers next to the mirror, and she grew angry again.

Neat, she thought. Her lips parted slightly, revealing her pearly teeth, like a tigress displaying her fangs. While I was sleeping… A man or maybe even MEN were walking around! Thank Goodness I didn’t sleep naked!

She checked the time, took her purse and left. The café wasn’t too far away, so she arrived within a few minutes.

The table had been reserved. Mary sat by the window and took a menu. But when she saw the prices, she nearly fell off her chair. Mary had never visited a luxury restaurant before and she was astonished.

Okay, she mused. Let’s hope if he invited me here, he’s going be the perfect gentleman and pay for my meal as well.

Mary ordered an orange juice and a chef’s salad, and waited. She was still very angry about the flowers and was preparing a few harsh words for the suspected culprit.

But Robert was late and Mary had plenty of time to calm down, people watching through the window, entranced by the endless stream of pedestrians and traffic rushing to who knew where.

***

It was already 1:00 p.m., and Mary was growing impatient, but decided to wait a few minutes longer.

Almost as if on cue, a limousine stopped out front of the cafe at 1:03 p.m. A heavily built but smartly dressed man opened the door and Robert quickly got out.

Mary J’s eyes flashed with joy. For the first time in her lonely life somebody stood up for her like he did last night and she felt more than just gratitude for Robert.

Mary observed Robert speaking on his cell-phone. At about five feet eight, with dark brown hair, Robert was very slender and elegant. He moved with masculine grace. When he was turning, his refined body curved like a snake, and his stylish business suit emphasized this serpentine likeness.

Mary involuntarily recalled the Bible: The Serpent, the Tempter, the First Snake. And she smiled. Robert impressed her, but unlike most women, she was not afraid of snakes, and she was also a strong believer in God, and plenty strong enough to fight Satan.

Robert looked at his watch and entered the cafe. Mary waved, and a smiling Robert came to her. The driver plus an equally hefty man followed him in and sat at the next table. She gazed at them with curiosity then playfully glanced at Robert.

“Did you send one of those guys to bring me the flowers?” She asked. There was no reaction, so she persisted. “You did grease the palm of the security guard in my building. Didn’t you?”

“No, birdie, I’ll explain.” Robert ordered his meal to the waitress and turned to Mary again. “I wanted your first morning in the new apartment to be special. So, I just did this!” He snapped his fingers, and Mary gasped, when she saw a cute tiny corsage of lilies of the valley appear on her plate.

“Wow! Neat trick. You must have clicked your fingers quite a few times to fill my apartment,” joked Mary J. She liked that she had made him smile then looked back down to admire the flowers. She continued to chat Robert up. “Are you always with bodyguards?” nodding her head in the direction of the men at the next table.

“I have to be.” Robert’s face was serious. “I have too many enemies.”

“They are both so gorgeous, I thought all bodyguards looked like gorillas.”

“I prefer them to be as strong as gorillas, but not necessarily quite so facially challenged, kitten…” Robert did not finish. He wanted to say: I only surround myself with things of the highest quality. But he was afraid she would misunderstand this.

“Especially, that left one,” Mary continued. “And his face is so intelligent, he looks like a senator, or some kind of professor…”

“His name is Roger Ahrman, and he’s more than just my bodyguard. He’s my most trusted companion, my valet and commander-in-chief.”

“What a name your valet has!” Mary laughed. “Did you say Ahriman or something?”

“Something.” Robert smiled.

“The Chief of Darkness Forces, eh?” Mary’s eyes were iridescent with interest.

“Look, little lamb, I have an awfully tense life. Sometimes it’s just vitally necessary to have a guy like him by my side.”

“Wow…” A nervous grimace replaced Mary’s smile as she felt a deep worry stirring up her heart. Please, she thought. Don’t let anything happen to him. Don’t let him disappear from my life so soon!

“So, how did you like your new apartment?” Robert asked.

“It’s great,” Mary said, sighing. “I’ve never even dreamed about such comfort. Especially the air conditioner! I like it. You know, when the night is so hot…”

She stopped short, seeing Robert’s eyes flashed, and he bent toward her. She blushed.

“I see, Mary, and plead, tell me, what did you do in the heat of the night?” Robert asked with his deep tempting voice.

“Nothing romantic, if that’s what you were inferring.” Mary’s lips flinched with a bitter grin. “I cried a lot, actually. Sad thoughts…”

“Feeling all alone?”

“No. I never felt alone. Just sad thoughts, that’s all. I prayed.” Mary saw Robert leaned back, slightly frowning, and now her own eyes grew narrow. “Do you have a problem with that, Mister Noirson?”

“My name is Robert.”

“I’m sorry, mist… Robert,” Mary voiced slowly, and liked the rumbling sound of his name. “But, you know, I’m a novice, so why are you surprised that I’m praising God?”

“No. It’s just a shame that a beautiful girl in the middle of the night dreams about being buried alive instead of how she meets her true love, for example.”

“How did you know I dreamt that?” she asked, taken aback.

“Maybe I just clicked my fingers.” He winked at her.

“Neat! You just guessed, didn’t you?”

“Call me lucky! Except I am sorry it wasn’t such a lucky dream for you.”

Mary was growing to like this compelling man, but pursued her defense of her chosen course in life. “I never thought about my decision to become a nun as about ending my life.”

“So what’s it all about then? A way of helping people?” He did not look convinced.

“You mean – there are many other ways to be helpful? You’re right. But in my situation, when I have no other family, and no one supports me…”

“I will.”

Mary gazed at Robert, melting under such a protective comment. She tried to overcome her softening attitude and went on the attack.

“It was mean to scare me half to death the other night,” she said with a reproach.

“I’m really sorry. But I needed to talk to you, and I knew that unless I went with any less back-up, you would start fighting and not listening. I know all about you being a bit of a feisty one when it comes to beating up people. Quite the warrior so Father Frank tells me.”

Mary felt her cheeks redden again.

“Don’t take me as a punk-girl,” she said, gasping. “But you have to understand – it’s one part of my education at the orphanage I am actually really grateful for.”

“So you can look after yourself, hey? You don’t need anyone looking out for you.”

“Please don’t say that.” Mary looked Robert straight in the eyes. “No one ever protected or defended me… before… quite like you… Thank you.”

“Oh I do understand you, my flower.” Robert carefully took her hands. “When I saw you in that green track-suit you resembled a drop of morning dew on an emerald leaf, when the sun beams touch it and wash over.”

Mary swallowed hard, her mind clouded, and a hot wave rose into her chest. Her breath stopped for a second.

“Wow.” She didn’t know how to react. “Sounds wonderful to me,” she blurted, “but please don’t pretend you didn’t have rather less romantic intentions… You know…”

“If I did, which I’m not going to say either way, but if I did, would you think it was unnatural?” Robert laughed. And Mary smiled.

“Look,” he continued. “You’re of age. I can ask you openly. When a healthy man meets a beautiful girl, it is natural if he has sexual desire for her. Am I right?”

Mary nodded. “Apparently, judging by that guy over there.” She winked at him as he turned to see an empty space where she was looking.

“Funny kitten!” He shook his head.

“Just saying, maybe there are lots of people who find the same person attractive, and maybe she should take the pick of the bunch!” Mary winked at him again and freed her hands from his. She didn’t want to offend him, however, and pretended to check her hair.

Mary felt that some tresses were not quite in the right place, but instead of rearranging them correctly, she slowly pulled them down. Her fingers ran through the blonde locks, and the gold cascade touched the tablecloth. She glanced at Robert, and leant on the table, propping her chin up with the gracious curve of her other hand.

She had never played with her hair in front of a man before. Mary was surprised at how pleasant she felt, looking at Robert’s intrigued stare when she wrapped a lock over her finger, let it uncurl, then touched her lower lip with her fingertip. Had she known how she was affecting him in public, maybe she would not have been quite so naively sensuous.

Resembling a noble senator, Robert’s valet, Roger, walked up to their table.

“I’m terribly sorry, sir,” he said quietly. “But we have to go. We’ve been here longer than planned.”

Robert looked at his watch, whistled and his face showed his dismay at being called away so soon. Mary felt pity for him and gently stroked his arm.

“It’s okay, Robert. I have a lesson pretty soon – I have to go too. I’ll see you tomorrow, I hope?” She looked at him intensely, then averted her gaze when she realized she felt drawn to him – and her feelings were far too intimate for such a public place.

Robert took her hand and she understood: he wanted to kiss it, but did not dare.

Mary took a deep breath, resolutely stretched her arm out and her reward? – a smile of pleasure when Robert’s lips touched her fingers so lightly, but with so much meaning.

***

After her lesson Mary went to the campus library, and worked on a computer for a while. She printed off the schedule of events for her team, then checked out the team’s account balance.

It was an unpleasant surprise to discover much less money than expected.

Hmm, she thought, frowning slightly, I thought Robert had donated more… Out of nowhere, at the slightest thought of his name, she was struck by a wave of passion. She savored so many pleasant sensations as her breathing grew short, and her body temperature rose. Involuntarily she stroked her chest, and was almost in a swoon, feeling her heart running wild and her head growing light. She smiled dreamily. What the heck, he would be so rich if he wasted all his money on charity…

Regaining her composure, a new thought came to Mary. She picked up the report, and went along to the office of good old Father Frank. She had to wait a while until the stragglers of a regular stream of visitors left, at which time she entered and approached his desk.

The priest looked at her with open displeasure in his eyes, but, nonetheless, he managed a wide all-sugar-and-honey smile.

Mary’s heart fluttered as a bolt of hot emotion struck triumphant.

Yes, you shrimp! flashed into her head. Look at you! Finally I’ve got you! And you know it. After all the suffering and tears you have caused me, oh, thank you, Lord, I’ve got you, you!

Wake up! her inner voice whispered. It’s only because of Robert’s patronage he has tripped up.

But it did not decrease her feelings of exultation. She bathed in the good feeling, and actually forgot momentarily what had brought her to his office in the first place.

“Is something wrong, Mary?” The syrupy voice of Father Frank brought her back to her senses.

It’s only because of Robert’s patronage, she reminded herself, trying to control her feelings.

She laid the report out on the priest’s desk right in front of him.

“Where is the rest of the money?” she asked casually. She was deriving great joy from the view she had of an ever more vexed Father Frank.

“Mary,” the priest said, trying to talk politely. “You have to understand. Your team…”

“Our team,” Mary corrected him coldly.

“Okay, okay, our team is not the only expense at our orphanage.”

“Fine. I agree, but for the next event you will be renting a bus,” she told him. “No way can we go to this place by public transport. First off, it’s a bad neighborhood. I’m responsible for the girls’ safety. Second, it’s much too far away. The girls would be tired by the time they got there. They have been training really hard and to get to the competition half exhausted. It just wouldn’t be fair.”

“Mary, I understand your concern,” the priest said as peacefully as he could. “Don’t worry, you’ll have this ride, be assured of that.”

Somehow the humble behavior of Father Frank lessened Mary’s sense of victory in getting a proper coach trip organized. Her heart, softened with love, could not hold a grudge against anyone. She looked at the priest with pity.

“Forgive and you shall be forgiven,” she cited, kneeling. “Forgive me, Father!”

“I bless you, my child, in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit.” Father Frank crossed the girl. “Go in peace to love and serve the Lord.”

Feeling happy, Mary got up and headed out the office. She was smiling, imagining the faces of her trainees, when she told them finally that they were all going to travel to the competition in some sort of style. She was just about to leave when she was struck by a thought. Oh, the missing funds! She stopped by the door, thinking.

Ah, whatever, she decided at last. I won’t let anything get in the way of the team. As long as Father Frank agrees to my suggestions, it’ll be fine. A compromise has to be better than a lawsuit, surely? At the end of the day, he does do a great job. And he’s not a bad person, I have to admit. All right, he is a leech, but he is responsible for the whole orphanage, for God’s sake! The Bible says “thou shall not judge” and I don’t want to judge him either.

Mary left, feeling like a huge weight had been dragged off her back.

***

In the evening, Mary was taking a shower. She turned the faucet until the water was so hot she could barely stand. The lukewarm mist filled the cabin, clouded her mind, relaxed her muscles. Mary felt herself dissolving in the murky fog that enveloped her like a thick blanket.

She slowly stroked her wet skin, so silky with shower gel. Her glorious hair was hidden under a shower cap, and she positioned herself so that her back was directly in line with the whipping stream of scalding water. She curled her upper body up, stretching with giddy dreams.

The torrent of water tickled her perfect skin, and when the physical pleasure of near pain mixed with some inappropriate thoughts of her and Robert together, Mary moaned audibly, shivering under the combined effect of such pleasant feelings.

What if Robert is watching me right now? she suddenly thought in a guilty panic. He gave me this apartment; maybe he placed some video cameras around?

She went on a thorough search of the bathroom.

Finally she got bored of that.

“If he wants to,” she mumbled. “Let him watch!” She made a few more suggestive stretching exercises, like a tigress preparing for a manhunt. She pulled the cap from her head and laughed at herself in the mirror as she ruffled her hair and posed. Mary finally left the bathroom, intensely rubbing her tingling, excited body with a huge green terry towel.

In contrast to the steamy bathroom, her bedroom was positively ice-cold.

“Oh my, what an empty head!” Mary scolded herself. Why did I set the air conditioner on maximum?

She turned off the offending cooler, and practically dived into her silky pajamas, a stunning emerald color that complemented her skin tone perfectly.

Finally she sat on the edge of her bed, and played some more with her hair. She shook her head, taking enormous pleasure in the feeling of freedom it gave her, and the gold cascade flowed extravagantly down onto the bed sheets. She stared at the phone on the bedside table.

Why hasn’t Robert called? she thought, annoyed. I hope it’s not too late for me to call him?

Hesitant, she lifted the receiver and dialed the number.

“Yes!” Mary heard Robert answer, and her heart stopped beating for a second.

“Mary, my birdie, is everything all right?”

“Hah… How did you know, it was me?” she asked, puzzled.

“The caller ID, honey?” Robert said with a smile in his voice. Mary felt stupid.

“Agh… I just want to be sure that your plans are unchanged for tomorrow.”

“Don’t worry, sweetheart. If there was anything different, I’d call you.”

“Thanks. Well, good night then.”

“Before you go, tell me, my dear, what are you going to dream about tonight?” he asked with his tender yet alluring voice.

Mary’s eyes widened with excitement and she brushed her fingertip over an excited breast.

“I don’t know!” she teased him. “Good night!”

She quickly hung up, crossed her arms to hug herself tight, and smirked. She did not know that the same self-satisfied grin was on Robert’s lips too, as he looked at his own now silent phone.

Jerry

Nineteen years old, Jerry was simply an awesome specimen. Well over six feet, he was every woman’s dream and a jealous nightmare for quite a few men. He had such a great body for his age, already gaining the hard solidity of full manhood, whilst in contrast his clean-shaven face was tender and girl-like.

When his thick wavy mane, the color of fallen leaves, was loose and flowed down below his shoulders, it gave him the appearance of a Viking, or some kind of deity from a Scandinavian saga. The big dark blue eyes shaded with long eyelashes, and his plum, refined lips made him even more attractive, and his natural, wild masculine beauty impressed all he encountered.

But this angelic-looking guy had a police record unlike that of even the most unpleasant and experienced criminal elements out there. His rap would have included robberies and burglaries; gun- and drug-running; suspicion of aggravated rapes and even a few murders thrown in. The cold-blooded, cruel demeanor Jerry showed when fulfilling the orders of his boss was legendary, even among his most hardened peers.

His luck couldn’t last for much longer, however. The police finally tracked his gang down, and despite determined resistance, a policeman shot him point-blank in the ensuing skirmish.

***

He was Beyond. And he saw numerous awful things that living human beings could not even imagine. Many, many times he went close to those horrifying events and felt intolerable despair and terror.

The worst aspect of this experience was that just as he seemed to win the fight to return to goodness, just as he felt a sense of peace at getting over the horror, a strong hand would guide him back forcibly towards new and boundless nightmares.

***

Jerry opened his eyes, and in his groggy state did not understand at first where he was. Suddenly he sensed pain again. He felt bandages and catheters and realized he was in a hospital.

An unknown man was sitting close to him and looking at him very attentively.

“My name is Robert Noirson, Jerry,” the man introduced himself in a deep low voice. “How do you like the place that you just visited?”

“Which place?” Jerry asked. It took a lot of effort.

The man smiled. “It was Hell, Jerry. And you’re going to that place. And all those events are waiting for you. You’re dying, poor boy.”

“No!” Jerry licked his lips and looked around the ward. “Where are the doctors? Why aren’t they trying to heal me?”

“They tried their best.” The man snorted. “But they are just humans. Besides, why do you want them to cure you? You’re going to have a lethal injection or get the chair. Which do you prefer?”

Jerry wept. He cried like a child. He did not want to die.

“Oh, come on, Jerry, what did you expect? Did you think you would go to Heaven? Did the Devil force you to do such things?” Robert waited for Jerry’s answer with curiosity. And he was pleasantly surprised.

“You’re right.” The teenager sighed. “Nobody forced me. I chose this path myself. Shit, it’s funny, you know, but I have never thought that everything has an end. But it does, doesn’t it!”

“I like your way of thinking.” Robert smiled. “So, how do you like the place that you’ve seen? How do you like Hell?”

“How the fuck do you know, what I saw?”

“Tsk, tsk, tsk…” Robert shook his head. “I’m a respectable creature, boy! Don’t use such vile language when you’re talking to me!”

The room was filled with the menace in the voice.

“Okay, sir,” the teenager replied derisively. “Could you explain, how do you know, what I saw in my delirium?”

“Because, I’m the manager of that place,” came a reply in a casual air.

The teenager stared at him. “Are you the Devil?”

“No, I’m just His Son. I did not say I’m the owner of that place. I said, I’m just the manager here, on Earth and there in Hell.”

“And you wanna get my soul?”

“Don’t be so naive!” Robert laughed. “I already have it! With my abilities, I don’t need servants at all, but I don’t like to waste the Power. So, if something can be done without using that, I prefer that way. And, well, I must follow some rules. One of them is that before I ‘hire’ someone, I have to tell him this: you can release yourself from me if you sincerely repent or commit something ‘noble’, and…” Robert stopped for a second and said with visible effort and spite. “And I must tell you, unbelievable as it seems, it happens sometimes! But I don’t think you’re such a person.”

The teenager double-checked his feelings. He really was not sorry. Reading his thoughts, Robert smirked and continued: “Here is one warning: if you die in fire, voluntary or accidentally, you’ll not go to Hell, you’ll just not exist until the Day of Judgment, when we all will answer for our actions.”

The gloomy anxiety in Robert’s voice made the teenager smile.

“Well,” he said, “everything you do you have to pay for, right?”

“Oh, you’re such a brave boy, eh?” Robert’s eyes glinted. “I like the way you think, Jerry! I like your sense of responsibility! Here is my offer: I promise you my patronage and caring as long as you are faithful to me. I know, you aren’t suited to being a leader, however, you’re smart enough to be a good soldier. All that I ask for is your submission. So, what will it be?”

“I’m hurting.” Jerry responded dismally. “I don’t know when I’ll be back on form.”